Original subtitles

♪ There's a hundred and four days of summer vacation ♪

♪ And school comes along just to end it ♪

♪ So the annual problem for our generation ♪

♪ Is finding a good way to spend it ♪

♪ Like maybe ♪

♪ Building a rocket or fighting a mummy ♪

♪ Or climbing up the Eiffel Tower ♪

♪ Discovering something that doesn't exist ♪

Hey!

♪ Or giving a monkey a shower ♪

♪ Surfing tidal waves, creating nanobots ♪

♪ Or locating Frankenstein's brain ♪

It's over here!

♪ Finding a dodo bird, painting a continent ♪

♪ Or driving our sister insane ♪

Phineas!

♪ As you can see, there's a whole lot of stuff to do ♪

♪ Before school starts this fall ♪

Come on, Perry!

♪ So stick with us 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all ♪

♪ So stick with us 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all ♪

Mom!

Phineas and Ferb are making a title sequence!

We're back, my loyal Schwartzes, all ten of you.

And as I was saying,

O.W.C.A would be nothing without me.

My evil helps them exist.

Wait, wait. What's this?

BeefyMustache55 is calling me a hack?

All right, you're going live.

Oh, I should've known it was you, Francis.

Doofenshmirtz, you would be nothing without O.W.C.A

foiling your evil ridiculous ploys.

My sweet, misguided Francis.

Your jobs wouldn't exist without us.

Let's see, "fight it out..." what, what's a simp?

"Settle it over a soccer match?"

That's so random.

Hmm...

What do you say, BeefyMustache55?

A bunch of expertly trained athletic field agents versus some...

haphazard scientists?

I am in.

Okay, if Love Muffin wins,

you have to shave your mustache.

How dare you?

When we win,

you have to shave your head.

Wh-- Wh-- When we win,

you have to shave Karl.

Please keep me out of this.

Oh, too late, Karl. A deal's a deal.

All right, gang.

It's time for us to play...

Can You Hit That Thing With A Stick!

The thing in this case being that rock.

What may I ask is this?

Can You Hit That Thing With A Stick.

Where we...

well, try to hit that thing with a stick.

I guess I should not knock it until I try it.

Wow.

The thrill of hitting that thing with a stick

- is like no other. - Truth.

Like no other? What's like no other? What are you up to?

Ooh, I feel the rush of hitting that thing with a stick.

Are you guys seriously just throwing sticks at things?

That is so not bustable.

Hmm.

Whoa!

That's weird.

I can throw balls, no problem. Watch this.

That can.

That mosquito.

That Hadron Collider.

Huh. Strange we never noticed that.

Now let me try this stick again.

Why?

I know what we're gonna do today.

We're gonna build a stick throwing target practice arena.

Hey, where's Perry?

He's just over there.

Okay. Let's go get some supplies.

Super code red emergency, Agent P.

The super code red emergency is that our organization, O.W.C.A.

has to square off with the evil scientists organization,

Love Muffin, in a soccer game.

And I get to be unpaid waterboy.

And I would obviously lend my incredible athleticism to the team, but...

I get a little too competitive.

It's uh, not pretty.

Anyway, Agent P, get over there and see what Doof's up to.

I know he'll find some way to cheat.

♪ Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated! ♪

Perry the Platypus.

How nice of you to showcase your loyalty to me.

You're on-- you're on our team, right?

No? Okay, fine.

The Love Muffin team will still be unstoppable.

As you know, kicking a ball is not my forte.

Behold, my bring me a ringer-inator!

Which, as you may have deduced, will bring me a soccer player,

because let's be honest, we are athletes of the mind,

not the body, obviously.

So, our team, you know, needs a little-- Ow.

My bad.

♪ You gotta hit that thing with a stick ♪

♪ Just loosen up your wrist and give it a flick ♪

♪ You gotta hit that thing with a stick ♪

♪ You're not too old of a dog to learn a new trick ♪

♪ You gotta be a stick throwing lunatic ♪

♪ You gotta hit that thing with a stick ♪

♪ It's gonna be sick ♪

♪ And it's gonna be sick ♪

Seriously?

You're just tossing little slender pieces of wood all day?

I'm not upset.

I'm just disappointed in you.

Ah! Left again.

Everything keeps going left.

- I'm cursed. - Maybe it's time

we go back to the drawing board and--

More sticks.

All right, O.W.C.A. This is for the honor of the agency.

Drill time.

Agent W pulled a muscle! Get the stretcher.

The big one.

Teamwork makes the scheme work.

I even convinced Vanessa to come show her support.

Ra, ra...

Dink Winkerson here, and out of prison so many times I've lost count.

But I'm out again, and I have a compulsive need

to report on the first thing that I see.

Ooh, a soccer game. That'll do.

And it's a beautiful day for the ultimate contest of good versus evil.

Francis.

Prepare to shave your upper lip and your intern.

You're lucky I'm exercising boundaries.

Otherwise you'd be burnt toast, Doofenshmirtz.

Oh, yeah? Let me introduce you to my little friend.

Cristo Fernandez?

Soccer is life.

But more importantly, acting is life.

Don't give me that look, Francis. You brought Megan Rapinoe.

Uh, yeah. I'm just here 'cause my house is being tented.

♪ The termites have nested, the house is infested ♪

♪ Tuff Tents ♪

And your misfortune is our fortune.

Let me get this straight. You're a soccer player turned actor,

turned actor-soccer player?

Si. Si. Si. But those are just three of my dimensions.

I have way more to offer.

Like... I'm also devilishly handsome.

And I'm back in the game.

Ra, ra!

Yeah, listen, you're an actor, so act.

If anyone slightly bumps into you,

fake an injury.

Do a, do a whole soliloquy, just sell it.

Hold on a second.

So, you just want me here to flop?

I actually played some professional soccer.

I don't need your life story,

just flop on the ground like a kid throwing a tantrum.

Our ref for today is Klimpaloon.

the old timey bathing suit that lives in the Himalayas.

♪ Give the ball a kick ♪

- ♪ Give the ball a kick ♪ - Ai!

♪ You've got to give that ball a kick ♪

♪ Give that ball a kick ♪

♪ Run up and down the field real quick ♪

♪ Wind up, give that ball a kick ♪

♪ Give that ball a kick ♪

♪ You've got to be a goal making lunatic ♪

♪ Hold up, stop ♪

♪ And pose for a pic ♪

♪ I don't want to be impolitic ♪

♪ But you should give that ball a kick, man, it's gonna be sick ♪

♪ Give that ball a kick, man, it's gonna be sick ♪

- ♪ Give that ball a kick ♪ - ♪ Yeah, it's gonna be sick ♪

Ow.

I should have stretched.

Oh, come on. That goal is not regulation size.

Enough of this.

Are you serious?

What?

And we're at half time.

Let's talk to the players.

- Well, I-- - The important ones.

Thoughts on the game so far?

Good question. I really feel like I've found my character's motivation.

What do you mean, structural damage?

Well, that sounds expensive.

And now a word from our sponsors.

Tuff Tents!

Just what we need to help Buford hit his targets.

Almost done.

And the second half is underway.

Agent B takes the ball and flutters gracefully down the field.

It hurts.

It hurts so much.

The pain, the drama.

Everything-- I have representation

and can also do comedy--

No, wait, no, you're overselling it.

You were supposed to stay in the game.

Oh! My house is ready.

Bye!

Ooh, both teams are down a player.

But O.W.C.A no longer has enough players to even continue the match.

They may have to forfeit.

That is, unless their coach enters the game.

Well, Francis? I've been playing this whole time.

Are you gonna step up, or do you want to just let me know

what shaving cream works best with your skin?

Karl, get over here.

You're putting me in?

No, I need hydration. I'm going in.

In the final seconds Love Muffin leading by one

on a two on one breakaway heading toward the keeper.

They pass back and forth, forth and back,

keeping the Platypus on his toes.

Incredible.

The block ties the game.

Hit me! Hit me, I'm open! I'm open!

Not today, Heinz.

Not today.

You're a monster, Francis.

Ooh, illegal tackle.

Doofenshmirtz gets a chance for a penalty kick to win the game.

It's all on you do, Doofenshmirtz.

Don't blow it.

Ha-ha!

Oh, come on. Don't act surprised.

I literally just said we're evil, so we have to cheat.

Okay, everyone.

Time to finish helping Buford hit his target.

A-ha!

Wait. Giant hands?

I guess it's not nothing. I'm getting Mom.

On the count of three, we'll activate Lenny.

One.

Two.

Three.

Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom!

What the--

Phineas and Ferb.

Yes, I did it.

I hit that thing with a stick.

Take that, thing.

Moving the entire city eight inches to the left was just what Buford needed.

Candace, sticks.

They're throwing sticks, sweetie.

But... but, but, but--

What the...

No way. How did-- What the--

You heard the referee.

Tie game.

This is Dink Winkerson, going back to prison.

Oh, sportsmanship. Fine.

Sir!

Okay, fine.

Well, I have to admit, that game reminded me

how important Love Muffin is for O.W.C.A to stay motivated.

And it reminded me why I'm behind a desk now.

My brain is more stable than my brawn.

Okay, fine. But you didn't win,

so I get to shave your mustache.

Well, you didn't win either, so I get to shave your head.

- A bet is a bet. - Carl, get back here!

Do you know what day it is today, gang?

It's a special one.

Well, my calendar says it's Bread Bowl Hot tub da--

Groan.

Oh, okay, let's focus on what Phineas and Ferb want to do.

We never do that.

Hey, kids. We're heading to the park for Danville Day.

I've got pie.

And the Mayor's giving a grand speech.

Okay, we'll meet you there.

All right, gang. Danville Day.

How can we crank this party up a notch?

Good luck with that.

There's already a grand speech.

I don't know. There might be a couple of notches up to which we can crank it.

♪ Doofenshmirtz finally got his oven repaired! ♪

Nothing says Danville Day like doonkelberry muffins.

Uh, Norm, can you bring me the thing I just printed?

The recipe or the essay?

Essay?

Oh! Vanessa's applying for college.

They grow up so fast.

"The most positive role model in my life,

by Vanessa Doofenshmirtz."

Se-- See look, Norm. She wrote about me.

I'm programmed to show interest.

Oh, here it is.

"Charismatic, inventive, beloved...

should be leader of the entire Tri-State Area.

My dear... Uncle Roger, the mayor?"

Wait. What? Why would she choose my brother over me?

Dad?

Sir.

Uh, uh... Oh, hi, Vanessa. Nothing to see here.

Just hanging out.

Whatever. I'm headed to the park

to watch Uncle Roger's speech. Want to come with?

Roger, Roger, Roger.

Okay, fine.

I've just gotta take care of a few things.

Ready.

Agent P, we have intel that Doof is headed to the Danville Day celebration,

which Roger is hosting.

He's giving a grand speech.

Don't let Doof ruin it.

Did you just bring me here to remind me how great my brother is?

Don't be ridiculous, Dad.

Just find us a good spot, yeah? I'll be right back.

I smell slushy dog.

Now, where's the best view?

Grassy knoll?

Book depository?

Ooh, a jungle gym.

Dunno why they call it a jungle gym.

It's not very jungle-y, but I do love a slide.

Whatever they're building is gonna disappear.

Mysterious force, why must you be so cruel?

Incredible, Ferb.

Wait till Candace gets a load of this.

Ooh. And get a load of that I shall.

That should keep the kids away.

From up here...

I'll have a clear view.

Perry the Platypus.

Uh, it's not what it looks like. I'm...

Well, I guess it is what it looks like.

So, I'm-- I'm having some trouble.

Little help?

Ha-ha!

Improvised trap.

Anyway, I'm here to teach Vanessa a lesson.

Here, look, she thinks Roger is her role model,

and aside from the strong jaw

and the dazzling smile, what has he got?

Just a sparkling personality, that's all.

And it got me thinking. What if I made an Inator

that gave Roger my personality?

Because my personality doesn't sparkle even a little bit.

Behold, my duplicate-inator!

With this, I'll make Roger a cheap imitation of me.

Therefore, I'll be Vanessa's role model by default!

By default, my favorite way to win.

Welcome to our annual Danville Day celebration.

Prepare to be duplicated.

Oh, come on.

His dazzling smile can't be that reflective.

Extra onions.

Extra evil.

Dunno what Candace sees in that guy.

Mmm.

Okay, wait for him to close his mouth.

Nice award winning smile.

You don't have to remind me.

You gave me an award for that.

Now.

Great work, Ferb.

These suits will help us build

a continuous carnival ride through the whole city.

How much fun is that?

And nothing is more fun...

than evil!

Why stop at Danville?

I know what we're going to do today.

Take over the entire Tri-State Area!

Ah! Candace the sister.

You're just in time.

For what, talking weird and hunching over like a praying mantis?

No, for the beholding.

The be-what-ing?

Let me explain, through a brief flashback,

and not so brief monologue, about my childhood.

Your childhood?

You mean your now-hood?

You are a child!

Nevertheless, our long necked nemesis,

your thwarting days are numbered.

Behold. The fun-inators!

Get ready, Danville, for the ride of your life,

you know, 'cause it'll last a lifetime.

It's a trap!

And with no one to stop us,

the Tri-State Area will be ours.

Happy Danville Day.

Join the fun, or else!

Or else? Like what do you mean, "or else"?

And again, what's with the accents?

♪ Look around it is a beautiful day ♪

♪ Come and join us let's get carried away ♪

♪ We've got no obligations and the city is ours ♪

♪ It's like sunshine, rainbows and a fistful of flowers ♪

Um, why are these restraints so tight?

It's a trap.

Remember to smile for the picture!

Are you a fan of my...

fan?

Make it stop!

Why? You're on a... roll!

Doesn't this feel like old times, Ferb?

Really takes me back to when I was a boy.

To last summer.

Phineas and Ferb, what are you doing?

Ah. Candace the sister.

How predictable.

And by predictable, of course, I mean...

completely dictable!

Care to join the fun?

Fun? These people are trapped.

- Come on, Candace the sister. - Stop calling me that.

I know you can't contain your excitement,

so let me contain it for you!

Curse you, Candace the sister!

Thanks for staying trapped for so long, Perry the Platypus.

I really needed to vent about Vanessa's essay.

This was nice.

Mom, Mom, Mom, Phineas and Ferb have turned evil.

How wonderful, Candace the Daughter.

Almond brittle pie?

Oh, no, not you, too.

Jeremy.

Jeremy, I need your help.

Ah, Candace the Girlfriend.

Doonkelberry dog?

Oh! Oh, no.

It's everywhere.

Ow. Hey!

Whoa! Whoa! Slow down, girl. Are you okay?

Oh, Vanessa, you're you.

Everyone's talking in weird accents.

My brothers are scheming to take over the entire Tri-State Area with Inators.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Did you just say Inators?

Yes.

I don't usually like to get involved with this stuff,

but if there's an Inator,

there's a self-destruct button.

There's always a self-destruct button. That will take care of it.

That easy? Wait, how do--

You know what? No time. Gotta stop 'em.

♪ Are you having a good time? ♪

♪ Is this your best day ever? ♪

♪ Don't you fret none, 'cause it's neverending fun ♪

♪ It's gonna go on forever ♪

♪ We're going out of our way to entertain you ♪

♪ Not sure why we have to restrain you ♪

♪ Why do you look upset? ♪

♪ This is as good as it gets ♪

♪ Are you having fun yet? ♪

♪ 'Cause we're taking over ♪

♪ We don't mean to scare you ♪

♪ But we're taking over the Tri-State Area ♪

♪ Dink Wilkerson here straight out of white collar prison ♪

♪ I'm the man on the street telling you what is and what isn't ♪

♪ Giant robot takeover ♪

♪ I think you better run, or you may be forced to have nonconsensual fun ♪

♪ We swear that we're not a threat ♪

♪ Just get in the net ♪

♪ Are we having fun yet? ♪

♪ 'Cause we're taking over ♪

♪ We're taking over ♪

♪ We don't mean to scare you ♪

♪ But we're taking over the Tri-State Area now ♪

Agent P, the Tri-State Area has been taken over.

Stop Doof immediately and...

Oh! You've already got him.

So, it's somebody else?

What kind of evil mastermind would...

Not our problem. Monogram out.

There's the self-destruct button.

But how am I gonna--

Uh-uh-uh. Not so fast, my nosy little nemesis.

No. No, I have to stop them.

They're destroying the city with... fun.

First the Tri-State Area, next...

the world!

How can I get up there?

Curse you, Perry the Platypus!

Oh, mysterious force.

If I ever needed you to destroy the boys' invention, it's now.

If you can hear me, please answer my call!

Mysterious force, you work in mysterious ways.

Well, that was fun, right?

Happy Danville Day, everyone.

Dad, are you okay?

Oh, hi, Vanessa.

So, tell me, how was Roger, your role model?

- Huh? - You know, your essay,

the college application? I read it all.

Dad, I only wrote that because namedropping the mayor would get me in.

Oh, you mean calling Roger your role model was just part of a diabolical scheme?

That's my little girl.

Who puts almond brittle in a pie?

Ew! Who puts doonkelberry on a dog?

Huh?

Wow, Ferb. What did we do today?

♪ Are you having fun yet? ♪

♪ 'Cause we're taking over ♪

♪ We don't mean to scare you ♪

♪ But we're taking over the Tri-State Area ♪

♪ Dink Wilkerson here straight out of white collar prison ♪

♪ I'm the man on the street telling you what is and what isn't ♪

♪ Giant robot takeover ♪

♪ I think you better run or you may be forced to have nonconsensual fun ♪

♪ We swear that we're not a threat ♪

♪ Just get in the net ♪

♪ Are we having fun yet? ♪

♪ 'Cause we're taking over ♪

♪ We're taking over the Tri-State Area now ♪