Original subtitles

Winter is coming.

Winter is here.

Come here, John.

I'll warm you.

You're going to cover yourself.

I may have abandoned the watch, but I still wear the black and adhere to the

oath.

Do you not love me?

Of course I love you.

I just cannot love you.

You know that.

John, how are we ever supposed to be together?

Every night I lay next to you, I find a hard time not touching you.

I have a hard time as well.

Very hard.

All the time.

It's not healthy, John.

Your balls will fall off. Just pop right off.

But what am I to do?

I took an oath.

And what did you swear?

I swore to hold no land, to take no wife, and to father no children.

What are you doing?

I have no lands to give.

And I understand we cannot marry.

But we can still fuck.

Say it would be fire.

Too weakly been on the road. Not a single word.

Are you mute?

Had your tongue cut out for knowing how secret?

Perhaps you're mentally deficient.

But then...

No retard could capture the Kingslayer.

Fire bad.

I think the Kingslayer has been captured by a retard, but are you a woman?

No woman could wield a sword this large.

Brienne, woman.

Jamie man, yes, Jimmy man

You

can lay with me

Ugh.

Thank you.

King Slayer has good colors.

I'll have to get you out of all the filthy

clay.

He's sucking my...

Good.

To what do I owe the honor of this divot?

My husband is thankfully dead.

My brother, captured by some sort of mute half -man, half -woman beast.

And my son.

My son needs to be kicked in the balls at least a dozen times.

Well, surely it can't be as bad as all that.

Now the people are uprising because Stark is dead and Arya.

That asexual cunt is missing.

And, of course, there's that dragon bitch in Karth.

Dragons? Really?

Well, dragons are the in -thing things.

And I can't remember half of the characters because all of their names

same.

Not mine.

And we keep hearing, winter is coming. Can these people say anything else,

My house's motto is, for the love of cock.

I don't know.

My great -grandmother chose it.

And my midget brother just married Sansa Stark.

Sansa? Even I can't stand her, and now she's part of the family?

Can you imagine all those Christmas dinners?

What were we thinking?

What the fuck is Christmas?

Varys, I need to get fucked.

Well, why didn't you bathe, though?

I thought you were a eunuch.

Well, if I didn't keep this a secret, I wouldn't get any work done.

How's this for a royal blowjob?

Magnificent, Michael.

All

these

damn clothes to get in the way.

That's obviously my car here.

Thank you.

Do you like that cream?

Oh, yes.

um

Don't rip it out.

I'm sorry, my lady.

I'm so sorry.

That's better.

It feels so good.

How long have you served the Dothraki?

My whole life, Mistress.

Have you always been a handmaiden?

What's that?

I was a pleasure slave.

Before you came.

And who exactly did you pleasure?

Whoever I was told to.

Except for the horses.

Never the horses.

What was it like?

What was what like?

Having sex with all those people.

I've only had sex with Khal Drogo.

My lady, Khal Drogo left us months ago.

That's okay.

He wasn't very good, I think.

Is it normal for a man to insist on feeding you carrots during sex?

And tell you how glossy your coat is?

Oh, mistress.

This will never do.

Let me show you.

I'm getting my nipples nice and hard.

Oh my god.

Fuck yes.

She's got a hand in it.

Okay, goodbye.

Oh, darling wife of mine.

One who inspires the thoughts of suicide and others merely by her presence. Come

with me.

Husband, I'm here.

Good girl.

What do you wish of me? I wish you not to be such a whining, mewling bitch.

I wish that you had not placed this in this arrangement.

Through your stupidity.

My lord?

It's time for you to ride the Shetland Pony.

What? I thought all girls liked to ride the Shetland Pony.

I'm Tyrion.

I'm a dwarf.

But I'm everyone's favorite character.

Where's you? You?

You should have been killed off in the very first book.

No one loves you, Thanta.

No one loves you.

Tyrion should be saddled with a red -headed cunt.

Tyrion had no other plan for his knife.

Oh, no.

I'll marry you.

Everything will be fine.

I just have to listen to your endless mindless whining.

Take off your clothes.

Take off your clothes and show me the one thing that you do well.

Show me the one thing that you do well.

By morning I'll have you sandwiched between Littlefinger and Tywin.

Good night.