Original subtitles

Alright, so, Shark Week officially starts tomorrow, but, uh, Wallabies on

rampage. Now you're talking.

Yeah, you see, like, see, they're clearing that fence. It's not tall

fence for a wallaby.

It's a rookie mistake.

Building a fence that tall in the outback.

I'll take your word for it. Your cow's gonna go hungry. I'll change.

Hey, you.

Hey. Who?

Well, it's the, uh, discovery. Oh, God.

Discovery plan.

Yeah, which is really interesting. It's about, you know, Australian wildlife.

And you're seeing the outside.

It's a gorgeous day. We need to do something.

Yeah, you guys have been watching TV for... You're always watching TV. It's

at our house. It's at your house. Well, he's got a nicer TV. He really does.

It's so much bigger. We should get a bigger TV.

Then let's go out. We'll go out and go shopping or we'll... I got it.

We could...

Go to a strip club.

I was going to go crazy.

Whoa, that's not even where I was going. I like it.

It's your bachelor party. Honey, I would never do anything to jeopardize the

integrity of our marriage like that.

Not on the cards.

Well, I would love to go to a strip club, but we just spent a lot of money

food for this party. I mean, we should probably eat this food.

Then we'll go to a strip club or something, but I doubt it.

Shark Week.

Really? You guys don't want to see some sexy girl? I have a beautiful wife.

Maybe I want to see other people, other girls doing... I don't... Guys,

be sure to come back before it's too late. No, you're not listening.

Just think about it.

You can sit on your lap.

We can walk and dance on the pool.

I don't want to objectify another woman like that in front of you. That would be

terrible. You know what?

Lacey, I have that recipe you wanted to take a look at in the kitchen.

Oh, yeah.

I'm pretty hungry.

Yeah, thank you very much. The food. We got everything.

So, yeah.

It's already got the grill going. It's going to be fantastic.

They were pretty loud. Only adults descend to drink.

I just, I've tried to, you know, ease him in gently.

Obviously, you know, you've made some suggestions as well, right?

Yeah, he keeps, like, every time that I bring up the snowballing thing, he keeps

saying the same snowboarding. I think it's, like, the accent is different.

I asked about that, too, and he didn't understand.

No. How do they not, like,

watch, like, any, like, online videos?

Like... I'm sorry about that. I don't know what's gotten into it lately.

Suggesting, like, strip clubs and stuff like that? That's a bit weird.

Strippers, strippers, strippers.

The other day, she suggested we do something called snowballing?

I don't even know what that is.

Snowboarding?

Yeah, it must have been snowboarding.

But she's crazy.

I mean, ever since she's got this internet channel.

website or whatever. She just wants to do all kinds of crazy stuff, but it's

somebody else's wife. I mean, you're married to that one person for the rest

your life. You only have sex for the rest of your life with that one person

because it's so good.

I mean, honestly, it keeps on getting weirder and weirder, the shit that I'm

putting in the search engines now, but I mean... And you're not getting any of

it?

No, he doesn't want to watch it because one of it has some weird tentacles, but

we're not going to talk about that. I tried to get my husband to stick a

in my ass.

And you won't even do that.

Titty bar, titty bar, titty bar. All the time, wasn't it? No, it's just not it.

There's more. There's like, let's do some threesomes and orgies and gang

and pegging.

Really? No, I had to look up what pegging is.

I just, we're just, we're going to have to take matters into our own hands.

I just don't know how we can, like, we need to think about this, okay? We've

prude husbands.

How are we going to break them into trying new things?

Well, I'm getting freaking bored. I need some new dick.

Okay.

That just gave me a really good idea.

So, how about we do a little flop?

Mm -hmm. I know.

Back where I'm from, a small country town.

We would never ever even consider doing anything like that. I wouldn't look at

your wife twice.

Well, no. I mean, even if they're beautiful. I mean, really, really hot.

I would never look at your wife. No, I'd look at your wife, ever.

What if we trick them, though?

Let's take these, cover those little eyes, and we'll see what's going on. And

then we'll just walk, and it'll feel so good. They won't want us to stop.

Well, I mean, what are they going to do anyways? Tell us no?

I don't think so.

We're going to get some new dick.

New tips!

New tips!

Whoa, hey, what's going on?

What's going on?

Well, you know, we've just been cooking up a storm for you two.

Yes. So much cooking.

Yes, that recipe I haven't heard of. Some kind of something magical, because

thought I heard you guys go, new trick, new trick out there. So is that some

kind of magical thing on there?

Yeah, you know, you can cook a lot of magic in the kitchen. What? That sounds

like it. I'm excited about it. So this surprise, though, involves kind of like

blind taste testing here.

So, yeah.

We're watching church here.

Why say no when it feels so good to say yes?

Yeah,

we had that discussion before.

We had that discussion before.

Smell all that goodness.

So we're going to go grab the food real quick.

So just keep those blindfolds on though. You have to keep them on. Otherwise you

don't get fed.

Okay, I still don't smell food.

What's a little bit?

It's nothing, honey.

We're just, you know, all that cooking could have put us in the mood.

And we're hoping to, you know, get our little fix before we sit down for

Thinking that maybe we need to...

expand our teeth butt a little bit.

So the trick is you guys are ventriloquists now. You can like throw

over from one spot. This is amazing.

I'm over there.

And I'm over there.

How are you doing that? What's going on with this though?

I mean, don't be shy.

This is what we've been talking about, right?

What?

I feel like you're such a big c***. Am I about to get pegged here?

No, no, no.

Oh no, don't touch it. No, no, no.

We're just tape testing.

I can't see what's going on. You have the blindfold on, huh?

I suppose that makes it.

Put the blindfold on.

Get that out of the way. I'm so scared.

Oh, that's new.

Is it appropriate in front of my friends? I

can't hear you. I love being around my friends.

I suppose it's not that wrong if I can't.

I got to see you.

Oh.

It's my wife on your dick and it's, what the hell?

Babe, do you really want her to stop?

Um, not really.

Do you want me to stop?

No.

I mean, do I?

No, of course not.

You're not in trouble here.

You're going to treat him real nice, right?

Catching up to do with you, huh?

Yes, I want that new dick so fucking bad.

I love you, baby.

I love you.

Really, that is new.

Oh, my God.

Oh,

my God.

Oh,

my God.

Oh, my God.

Well, your pants are a little wet.

It's not like he does his own laundry anyways.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

It's a new deck, honey.

Oh, my God.

Is everything okay, baby?

Oh.

You've been watching more, huh? Yeah?

Yeah?

on your dick face?

Do you like that?

cup of sugar.

Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

oh my

god oh my god

It's fucking harder than it is.

Thank you. Thank you.

Tell her you like her pussy.

Tell her you fucking like her pussy.

It's just like that.

Yeah, it's just like that.

I love you.

I love you.

I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you.

I love you.

I love you.

Oh, I think we heard you saying that you don't like threesomes.

Well, you like it when I suck her titties.

Does it make you feel real nice and hard and happy?

Yeah,

so you better fuck that fucking pussy.

You better show your wife how bad that you want a fucking threesome.

You can do it to me.

You can do it to me.

Oh my god. Oh my god.

Oh my god.

fucking pussy now. I want you to come on my fucking face. I want you to come on

my fucking face.

Can you do that? Can you do that for us?

Please. Please.

Please.

So you make it good, baby, huh?

Yeah?

Mm -hmm.

You messed up the pretty face, huh?

Can I do a good job, huh? Mm -hmm.

Oh, fuck.

Oh, wow.

Oh,

shit, girl.

Oh,

you drained him.

My husband's tongue looks so cute on you.

Oh, this worked out well.

Thanks, boys.

Yeah, thank you.

Shark week.