Original subtitles

So, how's your life going?

Having any chest pains?

Been in an accident?

Are you bleeding anywhere?

I'm the one you call when shit goes wrong.

I am your best friend on your worst day.

And all of the shit you're about to see

happened to a real, actual paramedic.

Me.

Well, well, well, Taggert.

Randy.

What's up, Mike?

- Who's your friend? - Nobody.

Student ride-along. Not a real person.

Man, don't take that shit from them.

Hey. What y'all doin' here anyway?

We got a disturbing the peace call.

What?

Taggert, what the fuck you talkin' 'bout?

They told us it was an unknown medical.

Shit, I hope it is.

Somebody gotta go to the hospital,

that's yo' paperwork, not mine.

Yep, the ABCs of police work.

"Ambulance before cruiser."

Please be "disturbing the peace."

Please "disturbing the peace." Come on!

Police!

OD.

That's on y'all, suckas.

Shit.

- You wanna get the stretcher? - Gladly.

Is she dead?

She's not dead. Dying, but not dead.

What do we assess first?

- ABCs. - ABCs.

- Airway, breathing, circulation. - Yes.

First thing, that's what we check.

- Understand that? - Yes.

- ABCs. They didn't-- - ABCs...

Oh, man.

Oh! Hey!

You know what the treatment is for a dirty needle stick? Chemo.

Same as for a cancer patient.

Seventy-two hours flat on your back and puking.

And a year's worth of HIV tests.

Alright. Now...

I'm gonna kill you motherfuckers.

I should mention at this point that you're all going to die.

Heart attack.

Car accident.

Murder.

Cancer.

Diabetic shock.

Fork in the toaster.

Or peanut allergy.

Rich, poor. Old, young.

Sometimes they don't find you for days.

You'll be dead too one day,

and sooner than you think.

Because guess what?

It all ends.

You know the movie of your life?

The one you're starring in.

One day, that movie just ends, and you're gone.

Remember what it was like before you were born?

It'll be just like that.

Forever.

But sometimes, 'cause of people like me,

you get a little borrowed time.

I'm gonna kill you motherfuckers.

Get the fuck outta my house.

Gun!

Secure your scene, Taggert! Secure your fuckin' scene!

Fuck, man. First of all,

I ain't know you could run that fuckin' fast.

God damn, you fast!

Second of all, who had a fuckin' gun?

I'm gonna fuckin' kill dispatch for this.

She shot at us.

You idiot! Someone pulls out a gun, you run!

- Clear! - Get your fuckin' ugly-ass

motherfuckin' hands off me,

you goddamn ugly fuckin' mutt!

Scene's all yours, EMS.

Randy, man, you okay?

I'm fine.

It's gonna be alright, okay, ma'am?

We're not gonna let you die.

Seriously, you say that one more time,

I'm gonna punch you in the throat.

We never say that to a patient.

- Ever. - Sorry.

What's that?

This is NARCAN.

It kicks the heroin off of the narcotic receptors.

This woman just paid a lot of money

to get higher than Jimi Hendrix

and we're about to take that away from her like... that.

Okay. You know what?

I wouldn't sit there if I were you.

Why?

Because...

of the puke.

It's in my mouth!

What the fuck?!

What did she eat?!

You stole my high, motherfucker!

You're welcome. Your life was saved.

We're taking you to the hospital, ma'am.

You need to-- Ma'am, settle down.

Hey, no. Hey! Calm down!

You need to calm down!

Oh, shit! Her arm's free!

No!

Oh, shit! Oh, no!

No!

- Got a needle! - That is illegal, ma'am!

Oh, God...

Are you kidding me?

You stuck me with a dirty needle!

You shit!

Hey! Mike, brake!

What the fuck?

Right... right in the face.

Hold her down!

Hey! Now-- Shit! I fell in it!

You crazy bitch!

- Shit! - Hey, hit her with the oxygen!

- Breathe, bitch! - What are you doing?!

I said hit her with it!

What happened?

We administered oxygen.

Yes, and then the patient needed to be restrained,

thereby possibly resulting

in some self-administered bruising.

Is that your medical opinion?

Sorry, what medical school did you go to again, doctor?

- Not a doctor. - Sorry?

- Not a doctor. - That's right!

You're not a doctor.

So what do you say we leave the diagnosing of the patients

- to the real doctors, huh? - Okay.

I got a dirty needle stick in the ambulance,

so if you'd please write a prescription...

- What a shitshow. - ...for retroviral--

You are unbelievable.

Hope you enjoy this nice, clean hospital...

- Any dignity left in the EMS? - ...while I'm out on the streets

getting vomited on, having to take pills

that smell like a hobo shat in my mouth!

Hey!

In one day, I've been...

shot at...

thrown up on, and... strangled.

And what, we still have...

11 hours left in the shift.

How do you guys do this every day?

It's our job.

Your job sucks!

Yeah, and it sounds real shitty when you say it like that.

Yeah, well, I can't go back on that ambulance.

Okay?

I quit.

I'm sorry, Mom.

Your job sucks!

Now there goes a future doctor.

Temperature readings warming up a bit today

into the upper 80s.

By noontime, into the low 90s.

Ninety-four today.

We're looking at some changes as we head into the weekend.

However, dry and pleasant weather continues.

Rain expected to return next week.

That's bullshit! You can't talk while intubated.

Crescent Premium, how may I help you?

Certainly. One moment, please.

Crescent Premium, may I direct your call?

Well, I see you've certainly put in your time as a paramedic.

Well, I imagine insurance sounds pretty boring,

but we do work under some pretty tight timetables.

How are you at handling stress?

Well, I'm a paramedic.

So...

I'm always stressed.

Is that why you chose insurance?

Well, I think that with my many years of experience

as a medical provider,

that transitioning to another

kind of medical or healthcare field,

I could bring beneficial experience.

Beneficial how?

Well, I...

think that being a paramedic is really important work.

And...

in all honesty, I got into EMS

'cause I really wanted to help people.

But the reality is...

we hardly ever help anybody.

We're just kind of a mop-up crew

for the worst tragedies in people's lives.

You know?

And, man, I have seen stuff.

I mean, dead bodies don't even register.

I've seen millions of dead bodies.

Body parts. I've seen arms and faces ripped off.

And, man, that image gets scarred into your brain

for the rest of your life, and I'm tired.

I'm tired. I show up to work first thing in the morning

and my first thought is, "Fuck everybody."

And given the opportunity,

I would set fire to that ambulance.

Because it's broken, Bruce.

It's broken. The whole system is fucking broken.

And it's sinking

and I'm out with a thimble, trying to bail it out,

and if I make one mistake, someone could die.

And you wanna know my experience?

I'm burning out.

I'm burning out.

I'm burning out.

I'm burning out, and...

I need the hell out of EMS

before I fuck up and kill somebody.

You have any other questions?

22, are you 10-8 yet?

Negative.

- Waitin' on hospital paperwork. - Waitin' on paperwork.

They are there hittin' on nurses.

That's some bullshit.

22, get movin'.

Here you go, baby. Put that back for me?

Oh, hey, Shanice.

- Hey. - Hey, Randy.

How'd you enjoy your week off?

Oh yeah, great. All the fun of cancer without the cancer.

Yeah, I had a needle stick once.

Oh, I remember.

That junkie behind the chicken place, with the hair.

Oh yeah, I forgot. I was ridin' with you.

Hey, that's right.

Hey, listen.

You gotta take me off the schedule.

Please.

You gotta cut down my hours, somehow.

Really. I'm in... I'm in terrible shape, Shanice.

Shanice, listen.

- I'm not okay. - Randy, I am sorry,

but I am shorthanded. I don't have anybody else,

so you're in 42 with Mike.

Come on...

Why you always sticking me with Mike?

He's the only one that can put up wit' your prickly ass.

You may not know, but you're not good at interpersonal relations,

and I hope that's not a shock to you.

'Cause know what? I rode with you for two years

but you break most people within two or three months.

Oh, come on. That's not true. That's not fair.

Lots of people like riding with me. Like Kim.

You like riding with me, right, Kim?

Oh. You do so like riding with me.

She likes riding with me.

Shanice, when we gon' get a raise?

Oh, baby, I would love to give you a raise,

and as soon as the government ups our reimbursements,

that's when you will get your raise.

And by the way, Randy, you have another student.

- No. Unh-uh. - Yes.

No. There's no way. No.

You are senior. You get the student.

Is there another paramedic I should put them with?

Somebody better than you?

- Nobody's better than me. - What I thought you'd say.

Oh, come on, baby. Don't do me like that.

You know I'm at work.

Look, I don't get off 'til seven.

No, not p.m., a.m.

I can get at you at 7:30, baby. All I need's 45 minutes.

That's more than enough time, you know?

Mm-hmm, about 15 pumps.

Aw, yeah, you know I like that.

Randy's here. I'll call you back.

Look at this old creaky bitch.

You know you only got like ten summers left.

Don't start with me.

I haven't even had breakfast yet.

Mike, you gonna let me drive today?

No. Okay? I drive. You know that.

- Come on. - No!

Look, I wheel, you heal.

Why do you wanna upset the natural order of things?

And look, we got a student today too.

I know. I'm hoping we can pull out

before that dipshit shows up.

Dipshit's already here.

Oh, fuckwad.

Or Jessica.

- Randy. - Hey, Randy.

- Thanks for having me. - Hey!

You know something? You seem pretty smart.

Bet you on the top of your paramedic class

and everything, ain't ya?

Hmm. Pretty smart.

I'm smart too.

Game recognize game.

- Okay. - Listen up.

We work a 24-hour shift, from 7:00 a.m. to 7:00 a.m.

You really wanna spend 24 hours

in this hot box with two sweaty dudes?

- Yep. - You're gonna see things

that you can't unsee.

I'm sorry, did I make a mistake?

Because I asked Shanice to set me up with the best

because I wanna learn from the best, so...

am I in the wrong truck, or...?

Okay. Alright. You wanna tag along, fine,

but here's what you're gonna do.

Nothing.

You are going to do nothing,

you are going to touch nothing,

you are going to say nothing

unless I instruct you to. You understand?

This is not a democracy, it's a dictatorship.

Okay? What I say goes.

Period. End of story.

Alright, "dick-tator." Let's hit it.

What the hell? We're supposed to be saving lives

and you're getting a latte?

We don't get lunch or bathroom breaks.

We got 24 hours ahead of us,

we gotta grab what we can when we can,

and right now I am starving.

Hey!

Do you guys really have to park like this, man?

You're taking up like three fucking spots.

We park that way in case we have to leave quickly

in an emergency, sir.

You know what? All you people do is tie up traffic.

You know that? You should get a fuckin' real job.

How 'bout that?

Hey, dipshit, we do have a real fuckin' job.

What do you do with this plastic-ass name tag, Kevin?

Huh? Go back to RadioShack, motherfucker!

- Chill out, man. - I don't have to chill the fu--

- You chill the fuck out! - What an asshole.

- Yeah, people are mean. - Fuck you. I'm not chilling!

You'll see.

Fuckin' handlebar mustache bitch.

Yeah, I'm sorry, Mama.

Coffee and a muffin.

No, you know what?

Two muffins. One chocolate, one blueberry.

Two muffins, one coffee. That is...

$10.25.

- Free coffee for heroes. - Oh.

Free coffee for firemen and policemen only.

I'm a paramedic.

Medic 42, emergency traffic.

Sorry...

Medic 42, respond emergent

to 5200 West Imperial Highway

for psychiatric patient.

Oh, it's your boy Johnny.

Man, I hope he's wearing clothes today.

You know something? I bet ya he's not.

Matter of fact, 20 bucks say he's gonna be butt-ass naked.

- Oh, no way. - Twenty dollars.

- Bet you right now. - I'm in.

You're payin' for my lunch today

'cause he gon' be fuckin' butt-ass naked.

- Let's do this. - Let's do it.

- Come on, big money. - Okay.

Hey, student of the year, what do you think? You in?

- Balls in or out? - Balls?

I am Satan and his only messenger!

Well, there you have it. It's a draw.

Shirt, no pants.

What are you talkin' 'bout? That's bullshit, okay?

I can see his dick. That qualifies.

He's not naked!

Call that naked? He's wearing a shirt.

Shirt, no pants. That's like... Winnie the Pooh.

I guess Winnie the Pooh got his dick out

because I can see Winnie the Pooh's dick.

Johnny, bring your naked ass over here!

Leave this place...

or I'll destroy you all!

Oh. Okay, so you really wanna test your immortality?

- Okay. - Leave now!

I am Satan and his only messenger.

Man, that's greedy as fuck. You cannot be Satan

and his only messenger.

Just pick one, okay? Got too many fuckin' jobs!

I am Satan and his only messenger!

Okay. You know what?

Have some breakfast. But...

leave people alone. Lay low. Okay?

Or I'm gonna hook the defibrillator up to your face.

Bzz! You understand?

Look. It don't matter. Put some fuckin' pants on

and get your ashy leprechaun ass from over here.

Nobody want to see that shit!

Satan does!

What...

County, it's Medic 42.

We are available. No patient on scene.

Repeat, no patient on scene.

Wait. What are you doing? You abandoned your patient.

You could lose your license.

- Satan loves me! - That is not a patient.

That is Johnny.

If he was actively schizo,

he'd be pulling out his hair

and biting his lips until they bleed.

That's what Johnny does when he's not on his meds.

Right now, Johnny's acting this way because he's hungry.

- Oh, he's hungry. Yeah. - Yes.

The guy wagging his dick around.

- Yeah. - He's hungry.

He wants us to take him into the ER

where they have to give him a meal before they let him go,

because the ER has no choice.

They legally can't turn anyone away.

Now, we could bring him in for his ER happy meal,

but guess what? There's a shit-ton of paperwork involved.

So it's a lot easier for me to skip the middleman

and give him my breakfast. And I'm starving!

Okay. So just to recap.

Your medical solution is muffins.

I sacrificed my delicious muffins

for the good of humanity.

- Mike, let's roll. - Alright. We're outta here.

Why are you here?

Because I wanna save lives.

- Is that funny? - You wanna save lives.

You think we savin' lives?

Come on, now. We just gave a dude muffins.

Yeah, I used to want to be a hero,

but the fact is, we're not heroes.

Okay?

The fact is that most of the calls we get

are bullshit.

The people that need us don't call,

and the people that call don't need us.

People live, people die.

You rarely make any kind of difference whatsoever.

This is a job.

Okay? You clock in, you clock out.

At the end of the day you go home. That's it.

I don't think you really believe that.

No, I do.

I do. I really, really do.

And you should too if you want to last.

But you have people's lives in your hands.

How can you not care? How can you not give a shit?

Caring is what kills you.

The fact is,

most people in this job can't last a year.

They can't hack it.

And the good ones, the really, really good ones?

Five years.

Five years, max. That's all they can handle.

How long have you been doing it?

Eighteen years, nine months.

Alright, class president,

this one's for real, so pay attention.

You're with me. Grab the bag.

- Okay. - Don't touch anything.

Nothing. Got it?

But then why am I...

even here?

Walk. Don't run. Never run.

- Why? - Why?

Oh, shit. Door's stuck.

- BSI. - What?

- BSI! - What the fuck is that?

- Put your gloves on! - Oh. Okay.

- Hey, Jimmy. - Hey.

Gonna need you to pop that door.

- Got it. - Also need an additional driver.

I need Mike in the back with me.

- We're on it. - Hey. Everything's okay?

What is that?

I answer questions after the fact.

It's a window punch.

Okay, go ahead.

Pull her out the side.

- Move in. - Little more.

Alright, head of her class, what do we assess first?

Airway, breathing, circulation.

He's breathing, but it's rapid deep breaths.

Kussmauls?

Wait, am I right?

Rookie, get out the way.

What's goin' on here?

Got Kussmauls.

Possible broken everything. What about you?

Lady was just a little shook up but she's alright.

Alright. Grab me a collar, will ya?

Okay, I got you.

- Get out the way. - Sorry. Sorry.

Alright, and grab me a non-rebreather.

You just said not to touch anything.

And now I'm asking you to touch a non-rebreather

and bring it to me.

Wait. No.

Sorry.

Not in the truck. In the bag!

- The what? - In the bag!

Oh, shit.

Walk. Don't run.

Hey, buddy. Can you hear me?

One, two, three.

One, two, three.

No. Yeah, I got him.

- How am I doin'? - Alright.

Nothing in the belly, good in all four.

Got this, hero?

Oh, shit. He's in V-fib.

You, I need you to do CPR.

Now. Go. Go!

Harder.

Harder! You're not doing anything.

Harder!

Oh, God! I think I just broke his ribs.

No. That's a good thing.

Don't stop, okay? Means you're doing it right.

Yeah. I can fix broken. I can't fix dead.

Come on!

Are we gonna shock him?

No, we gonna wax his chest.

Yes, we gonna shock him.

Charging.

Clear.

Brainiac is clear. All clear.

Comin' through.

Hello? Hello!

Got a approximately 40-year-old male, two-car MVA.

Restrained driver.

Severe damage to the vehicle.

Ten-minute extrication.

Kussmauls at first,

but once we got him out went apneic and V-fib.

Been shocked three times. Last was on the drive here.

Now asystolic.

Ready? One, two, three.

Pupils are fixed and dilated.

Fractured right arm and depressed skull fracture in--

Hold compression. Just hold. Please.

He's asystolic.

You said he was traumatic. Did you ever get a pulse back?

- No. - No.

No.

Time of death, 10:29.

Oh, God. You gotta be shitting me.

Is that mud?

Well, nice job, Dr. Randy.

Just track all the mud and bacteria you want

into my ER.

Seriously?

Hey. What happened?

The doctor just called it? That's it?

Yes, that's it.

Dude was dead when we got there.

Okay, well, if you thought he was dead,

then why did you make me do CPR?

Because nobody dies in an ambulance.

What do you mean? It's an ambulance.

- People die all the time. - Nobody dies in the ambulance.

It's a legal nightmare. Once we start working on you,

we're not allowed to declare you dead.

Only a doctor or coroner can do that.

So even if he has zero chance of making it,

even if we're just pumping blood through a corpse,

we cannot declare him dead.

Now, he can be dead before we show up,

he can be dead once we drop him off,

but never, ever in between.

That doesn't make any medical sense.

It's not medicine.

It's healthcare.

Welcome to EMS.

No.

No! God damnit.

Stay.

No! Go!

Take my dollar, you motherfucker!

God damnit!

Children can hear you.

Fine. Good. Do you have a dollar?

What I don't understand is, if you hate your job so much,

why don't you just quit?

'Cause I like to eat and I don't like to sleep in the gutter.

- So get another job. - Like what?

Like airline pilot? Huh?

I've tried. I am stuck here. Okay? Work at the hospital?

All I'm qualified to do is change bedpans and wipe asses.

My training doesn't mean shit here.

Go to med school? Forget it.

No. By the time I finish,

it will be time for me to retire.

Okay.

Wait. What? No!

God! I hate you!

No!

God!

Okay.

Randy?

Oh, Christ. I feel like my heart's coming out my asshole.

Hey.

What's the matter?

No, I'm fine.

- You havin' a heart attack? - No. Just stop it. God.

- No. - Okay, so a panic attack.

- No, it's not. - Take some slow, deep breaths.

Hello? Paramedic.

Are you okay to work like this?

Look, I'm gonna be fine. I just...

Just need some-some time.

You don't understand.

You know, when I was 13...

my mom and my sister and I

went camping in the middle of nowhere.

And my mom really liked cold chicken,

so we were eating cold chicken

on a picnic table with some potato chips,

and my mom got a piece stuck in her throat.

And I didn't know the Heimlich or anything...

so right there...

in that dumb campground...

my mother died.

And I just watched.

So that's why I'm... that's why I'm here.

I'm gonna tell you something

that I wish someone had told me a long time ago.

Run away from this job as fast as humanly possible...

or you will end up like this.

That's weird.

Hello? This is Randy.

Okay.

Okay.

What you mean you can't be late?

I know you're a teacher. Fuck those kids.

Just don't-- It's too early to be...

What the fuck goin' on wit' you? Hey, stop.

Mmm!

Yeah, I think Randy doin' crack.

Whoo-hoo!

Yeah!

Hey! I quit!

I quit!

I got a new job. I'm quitting!

That's it. I'm done.

I'm done. I got a new job. I can't believe...

I totally thought that I blew the interview,

but apparently they loved my honesty.

So... that's it. I'm outta here.

So... It's...

Shanice, you've been amazing. It's not you. Really.

Thanks. You're the best supervisor.

I really-- Thank you s--

I don't need to give you two weeks, do I?

I don't think I could stay another two weeks.

I can't do two weeks' notice. They need me to start Monday.

Come on. Please l-- I can't believe it!

Honestly, I didn't know that I could feel happy.

Hello? Are you still there?

Yes, I'm still here.

Can we re-up on rubber gloves,

hypos, and normal saline-- Hang on!

Randy! I did not say you could quit.

And you have to finish your shift!

- Asshole. - Excuse me?

No! Not you.

Okay! We ride!

We ride!

It's my last day-ay!

It's my last day!

Whoo!

So long, fuckers!

Yeah!

Ah... I love the smell of nursing home in the morning.

How you doin'?

Hmm. What's for lunch?

What the fuck is wrong wit' you?

Sorry?

This happiness is making me uncomfortable.

It's actually kinda freaking me out.

Yeah, it's a little unnerving.

Well, in 18 more hours, I am done with EMS forever.

Hi. Hello.

What took you so long?

What you mean what took us so long?

We got here in six minutes.

That's two R&B songs. Six minutes.

We can't get here faster than six minutes.

The fuck you think we got, a teleporter?

Where's the patient?

Alright, look. Just...

follow me.

This way.

Come on.

How the fuck did he get this job?

She's been having a little trouble breathing lately.

Define "lately."

Newbie, what's your assessment?

Well, she's cyanotic, appears to have lividity.

In my professional opinion...

she's dead.

Hmm.

- You gotta do something. - Do something? What? CPR?

She's dead.

Got a better chance of reviving the nightstand.

You gotta try.

No, we're not touching her.

- Unh-uh. - Alright.

I'm gettin' the charge nurse.

You can if you want to.

Is the charge nurse a magician?

Because that's the only way this lady is coming back alive.

With magic!

Waste of time.

Even the newbie knew she was dead.

No offense.

I am offended.

Hey, County. Medic 42.

Medic 42, this is County. Go ahead.

County, we need a coroner.

We have a DOA on the scene

and we're standing by for paperwork.

Copy, 42. Contacting coroner.

What do you mean, coroner? What's going on here?

Your patient is assuming room temperature,

I declared her dead,

the coroner is coming, and we are going to leave.

How do you know she's dead?

What are her vitals?

You wanna know her vitals?

Well, if you must know, zero pulse,

zero over zero blood pressure,

zero respirations.

Like all... zeroes.

Would you like to know her blood sugar?

She was just fine when I checked on her a few minutes ago.

A few... minutes ago? Really?

Shake her hand.

Go over and shake her hand.

Do it.

- I'm good. - Mike?

Look.

Look!

"Hi. I'm dead."

Goddamn, she cold.

You know why she's fuckin' cold?

Because this is rigor.

'Cause she's dead.

This type of stiffness don't take a few minutes.

We talkin' five or six hours.

Huh? You can iron your clothes on her,

that's how stiff she is!

Stiff as a board!

Can I be honest wit' you?

You're probably the worst nurse

I've ever fuckin' met.

This is totally unacceptable.

I'm calling your supervisor.

Oh. Please do.

That would be hysterical.

In the meantime, I suggest you get Mrs. Pustelli on ice.

She's starting to add to the lovely aroma around here.

I smell dead people.

- Hello! - Randy,

who is this nursing home lady

screaming at me on the other line?

Look, these people are idiots, okay?

They had a patient of theirs that was dead for hours.

Randy, you have got to learn to manage these people

and stop acting like an asshole to everybody.

Now I gotta deal with this mess.

It's my last day, Shanice.

It's not my last day, and if you finish your shift

we'll see if it's your last.

Really? Oh, no. This is definitely my--

I said what I said.

Fuck.

So, Carol, if you were assessing that patient,

would you classify them as alive?

I see. No. No, you're right.

I don't have a nursing degree.

I was trained as a paramedic.

Uh-huh. Well, let me ask you something, Carol,

since you deal in elder care.

My grandmother died 12 years ago at the age of 99

and we buried her next to my grandfather

at that cemetery out by the airport. Know the one?

Uh-huh. Well, let me ask you this.

If you and I were to go out there together right now

and dig up my grandmother's corpse,

do you think you could revive her?

Because that makes about as much sense

as what you're saying to me right now.

Your patient was dead, bitch.

Mm-hmm. And your people didn't realize it

for five or six hours.

That is called negligence.

But you thought you'd just call 911

and cover your asses, is that it?

Ah. Well, how 'bout you and I call your administrator

and go over this incident point by point

and see which one of us still has a goddamn job

by the end of the day?

Oh! You're suddenly okay?

We're clear now, Carol?

Great. Well, if you have any more problems,

my name is Shanice, you call me immediately.

You got that?

Damn right.

Oh my God, I am so hungry.

Mike, find a taco truck or something.

My stomach is eating itself.

Got you. That's all you have to say.

You didn't really quit, did you?

Yeah. I did.

- No, you didn't. - Yeah, I did.

- No, you did not. - Yes, I did.

Look. Let me say this, okay?

Randy has been in this way too long, okay?

EMS is not supposed to be working this long.

He don't know what he's gonna do out in the real world.

This motherfucker can't do shit.

What are you talking about?

I wouldn't know how to function out there?

Oh, but you know how to function out there.

- You damn right I do. - Yeah.

I function well out there too.

'Cause I'm a normal fuckin' person.

I go home, I take a shit,

then I take a shower and I put on my clothes

and I pick up my lady, we go to dinner,

then we come back home and we fuck.

Okay? That is called being a part of society.

You, on the other hand,

would not survive one day in the real world.

'Cause he ain't did shit. Don't do nothin' besides this.

When the last time you been on a date?

Hmm? When was the last time you washed your fuckin' sheets?

Oh...

Well, where are you gonna work?

I'm working in an insurance company.

- What?! - What?

- Are you... - What?

You gon' work in insurance. Please.

Man, you can't even work at fuckin' Subway.

I could too work at Subway.

You gotta deal with customers to work at Subway.

Yeah. I could deal with customers.

You could? Let's pretend I'm a customer.

- Okay. - Okay. You ready?

- Yeah. - I walk in. Ding!

The little bell go off. I'm in there.

Oh, hello, sir. Are you having a nice day?

I'm having a great day.

I would like a sandwich for lunch.

- Okay. - You really supposed to--

Would you like a six-inch or a footlong?

Okay. I want a six-inch vegetarian sub, okay?

- On wheat with chicken. - Mm-hmm.

- Hmm. - Okay.

That doesn't make it

a vegetarian sub if you add chicken.

No. I would like, like I said,

a six-inch vegetarian sub on wheat with chicken.

I'm sorry, sir, we can't do that

'cause that's not a vegetarian sub.

Motherfucker, it is.

- I'm the customer. - If you have chicken on it...

See? That's exactly why you couldn't work there.

- But it's not vegetarian! - It is vegetarian!

There are rules here, sir. There are rules.

I can order whatever the fuck I want. Alright?

I want a orange Fanta

with grape juice in it.

You can serve your own drink, sir.

Here's your cup. Go to the drink station.

What type of racist shit is that?!

Fuck that. I'm calling corporate.

Beep-beep-boop-beep-beep. Corporate.

Hey! This dude named Randy that work at the Subway

is a asshole, okay?

He tried to make me make my own fuckin' drink!

Also this is a Black man calling,

so you know what that's about!

Bye! Fired!

- Shit. - Alright.

Well, you know what? I'm not working at Subway,

so... win-win.

Medic 42.

No. Come on!

Not now. Don't take it. No. No, Mike. Please.

Come on, man. It's our job.

- 42 is here. Go ahead. - Oh, God.

Medic 42, emergency traffic.

Respond emergent in 33 Cooper Court.

Oh man, I hope this patient is dead so I can eat.

I need a taco.

Oh, this is gonna be fucked up.

Hey. Sir?

Sir, excuse me. We just wanna take a look at--

Yeah. Hey.

- What? - Hey, sir...

Why don't you get on the ground so we can help you out, okay?

- Here, come here. - Should I take my helmet off?

No!

- No. - No.

Real s-- No! Okay.

God damnit.

- Better... - Oh.

You've had a little too much to drink this afternoon?

- Just a little. - Be right back.

I'ma get the rest of the equipment.

Hold C-spine, please, madam.

- Yep. - Thank you.

Hello there. My name's Randy.

We're gonna be taking you to the hospital today.

- What's your name? - My name's Matt.

Or Matthew.

Okay, Matthew.

I'm... just wondering if you--

Know what? Maybe call me Matt, actually.

- That feels more like... - Okay, Matt.

Matt it is. Any other pain anywhere? Hmm?

Eh, just like... a little headache,

but I don't think it's a big deal, doc.

Not a doc. Paramedic.

Can you tell us a bit about what happened?

Yeah. I crashed my bike--

- Oh, hey! - Okay!

- We wanna hold you real still. - Sorry.

Real still.

I don't have to go to the haps-- hospital, do I?

'Cause I don't have insurance.

Matt, don't worry about that.

They're just gonna send you a soul-crushing bill later on.

Excuse me. I'm a nurse!

Excuse me. I'm a nurse.

I saw the ambulance and figured you'd need help.

Let's get this helmet off.

You don't have to do that.

Lady, I don't wanna be mean to you

'cause you remind me of my auntie,

but leave us the fuck alone.

Is this like a turf war over me?

Right. I need you to bandage his eyes.

What's wrong with my eyes?

Eyes. Both. Both eyes.

Why? The other eye's fine.

Not a democracy.

- Both eyes. - That doesn't make any sense.

- Why would I do that? - Both eyes.

Hey, do you guys know what you're doing?

Because, like, it sounds like you don't agree.

Oh, we know exactly what we're doing.

Let him see out of his good eye.

Taggert! Escort this lady out of my presence immediately.

What?

- Come with me, ma'am. Let's go. - Out.

I'm not leaving my patient.

- Mm-hmm. - No. This is my patient!

Mine!

Sorry. I'm trying to understand.

Did you have me wrap both eyes

because you didn't want him to panic?

What did I say? Not in front of the patient.

- I don't understand. - Not in front of the patient!

- I'm trying to understand. - Dictator, remember? Dictator!

Yeah, dic-something.

I can hear you guys.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is Matt, or Matty.

- 42-year-old male. - Matthew.

Conscious but not alert. ETOH on board.

Penetrating injury to his right eye.

As far as we can tell, no neuro involvement.

Vitals are stable. No SOB or other injuries detected.

Wow. That wasn't interesting at all.

'Cause to me, what I'm seeing here

is a stick in the eye!

What?

I'm sorry, sir. Your eye, it's...

jelly.

Aw, man!

I can sew it up and give you an eye patch.

That's the best I can do for you, though.

You can thank your friends in EMS.

I did everything right.

Get out of my ER.

That guy's a dick.

No. Why both eyes?

- It is a reasonable question. - Listen.

Our patient is scared and confused

and he needs to know we know what the fuck we're doing.

So stop asking questions in front of him

like a fucking five-year-old.

Know what? I came here to learn from you

because I thought you had something to teach me.

Instead, you give me bullshit

about how saving lives doesn't matter

because you're dead inside.

You're everything I don't want to be. Everything.

- Shh! - Top to bottom. What kind of--

Boo-hoo. Are you jaded? Are you Mr. Tough Guy?

- What's behind the eyes? - The brain.

Right. And do we want that stick moving, carving the brain?

- No, we don't. - No. We do not. Right?

- How many eyes do we have? - Oh, come on.

- How many eyes do we have?! - Two! We have two.

Do they work independently?

Oh, shit.

Yeah.

Where one eye moves...

the other one follows.

They move in tandem.

How far is that stick back there?

We don't know. Is it digging up the brain?

We don't know.

Our job is to stop the trauma

and get him into the ER as soon as possible.

Listen.

The problem at an accident scene

is everyone is so amped up and full of adrenaline

they get tunnel vision.

They're just looking at the one problem.

They're not seeing the big picture.

Our job, while everyone else is freaking out,

is to take a deep breath, step back,

and see the whole thing.

You're right.

- Sorry? - You're right.

I didn't think about that. Thank you.

Okay.

I shouldn't have questioned you in front of a patient.

I'm sorry.

It won't happen again.

Are we good?

Yeah. Yeah, we're good.

Well...

Let's go get a burger before I drop dead.

Did you put that dipshit in his place?

No.

Because he was right and I was wrong.

Okay, look. Randy can be an asshole sometimes, you know?

Okay, yes, he's a asshole all the damn time.

But there's nobody else I would ride with other than him.

Jesus!

What the hell, man?!

- What are you-- - He's falling apart.

Pedestrians have the right of way!

You almost killed me!

We all end up like that?

- Calling yourself a paramedic! - A broken mess?

Get out!

Hey.

Can we go? Please? I'm hungry.

- Okay. - Alright.

Let's go feed this motherfucker.

Stop!

- Okay? - What?

What you're doing is fuckin' disgusting.

- I'm hungry. - What you mean, you hungry?

Just puttin' shit in your mouth.

You're eatin' like a fuckin' Pac-Man.

You know something? I don't even wanna eat no more.

I done lost my appetite watchin' you eat.

Pretty soon, I'm starting this job,

I'm gonna have a real lunch hour.

One hour every single day.

I'm gonna work nine to five.

I'm gonna go home, I'm gonna sleep.

Hey.

Excuse me. Are you an ambulance driver?

- Paramedic. - Okay. Wait.

Can I just ask you one question?

Okay. Can I just have like ten more minutes

and then I'll answer whatever question you have.

Wait. One thing. Super quick.

What's the worst thing that you've ever seen?

Why do people always ask me that?

I mean, I get that there's a morbid fascination,

but I mean, why do they ask me that?

What's the worst thing that's ever happened to you?

Want to think about that right now?

I sure don't.

I have seen some terrible things.

I know things that you do not want to know.

I know what brains smell like.

Brains have a distinct smell. Did you know that?

Sometimes I smell it when I come out of the ambulance

and I know right then and there, better watch my step

or else I'll slip and fall in some poor dead soul's memories.

You know what's in there?

Dead two-year-old.

She got decapitated by the seat belt upon impact.

Wanna look in there?

You want that image seared into your brain

forever and ever?

Well, someone's gotta look inside.

Someone's gotta have that image

in their brain for the rest of their lives.

I'm that somebody.

That's not even the worst thing I've seen.

So we get a call, unknown medical,

neighbor's complaining about smells.

Go into the apartment, meet the woman,

she seems totally normal,

but apparently she's suffering from postpartum depression.

So I ask her, "Where's the baby?"

"Where is the baby?"

Sure enough, there it is, in the microwave.

- Stop. - And its face...

was like melted cheese.

Oh my God.

That is the worst thing I've ever heard in my life.

I know! I ordered it medium rare!

Ah, come on!

- What the fuck? - Come on!

Hey, come on. Don't be like that.

You wanted to know.

You don't want your chicken sandwich?

You gonna finish that?

Okay, so, there wasn't actually a baby in the microwave.

See, that's what it is. You still new to all this.

And you ain't seen shit yet.

Like, nothing. Not at all.

You still got all that resilience in you.

You got the emotional reserves in the bank.

You got all that in there.

And when bad shit happen,

you still got that cushion inside.

Yeah, but when you been doin' this long enough...

you run out of those reserves.

Yeah, but you keep doing it.

Aw, hell no.

Shit, I'm goin' to law school in six months.

- What? - Yeah.

Why law school?

You know who gets fucked over more

than anybody in this country?

Hardworking people.

Hardworking people.

Perfect example: My mom.

She passed two years ago of cancer.

And two years before that, she went to the hospital

'cause she knew something was wrong.

You know, and they checked her out.

Her insurance covered that.

They diagnosed her, and her insurance covered that.

But when it came to actually helping her...

they told her she didn't have the right policy.

She did her best. She was calling the insurance company

and... arguing and fighting and...

But as she was doing that, the cancer spread.

And she died.

Wasn't even about the doctors at that point.

She needed a lawyer.

Look, I wanna help people. That's why I became EMS.

You know? I wanted to make a difference.

And I don't feel like that's what we doin', man.

Also, I...

would love to not make minimum wage anymore.

I'm broke as fuck.

I'm taking all this shit home and warm it up later.

I don't have a goddamn thing.

Well, you know, it's nighttime now,

so it's 'bout to get really weird.

- Weird. - Weird how?

Medic 42, respond to A143 Orange Avenue

for a psychiatric patient.

Shit, man. It's the president.

I'm the president of the United States!

Ah! Shit! He hit me in my nuts!

Mike! Help! Mike!

Get your hands off my friend, motherfucker!

Mike!

Ah!

Hit him with something!

Not fruit! Don't hit him with fruit!

Call another ambulance!

Charlie, we're trying to fucking help you!

- Stop it! - I'm the president!

I'm the president of the United States!

This is what happened last time.

So that is why we gotta get him in the ambulance peacefully

or he will kick the living shit out of us.

He sounds like he needs to be in a psychiatric facility.

No. Look, he's a sweetheart, man.

He don't mean any harm, you know?

That's usually when he's on his meds.

Now, if he's off his meds, it's a different story.

Plus it's the end of the month.

What happens at the end of the month?

Look, the system give him 20 pills a month, right?

But there's 30 days in a month.

What do you think Charlie do with those other ten days?

Loses his shit.

Sometimes he makes it to the end of the month,

sometimes he don't.

Right now look like he didn't.

So we're not calling PD?

- No. - No.

Look. Charlie is a 6'6" Black man

with mental health issues.

Would you call the police?

Hey, Mike, kill the lights.

We don't wanna set him off any more than he already is.

I'm the president of the United States!

I hate the end of the month.

Wait.

Hey.

- You have all your teeth? - Yeah.

Then you're gonna wanna stay about, oh, I don't know...

- Oh. - ...that far back.

Alright.

Alright, look.

- Y'all ready? - Ready.

Okay, I'm 'bout to knock.

Secret Service!

Shit.

Hey, Mr. President.

Look... The Secret Service, man.

We here to evacuate you and take you to the White House.

What about the first lady and the vice president?

We're gonna send a second chopper.

Mm-hmm.

We're not leaving anyone behind.

- Okay. - Okay?

- Top secret. - Top secret, so lay low.

Come. Sir.

- Come on. - Please. Come.

Come on.

Stay low. Watch for snipers, sir.

Right this way, sir. Right this way.

- Here we go. - No.

- No. - It's the chopper.

Hey, show him that it's the chopper. Like...

The chopper's right here, sir.

Right this way.

Come on, man. You got this. Come on. It's good.

Alright, we got Mr. President with us.

Come on, sir.

Shit.

- Hey. - No. Hey.

Officers. Excuse me.

Hey, we've got this totally under control, okay?

This is a patient of ours.

He's having an episode right now.

There's really...

- Calm down. - No reason to panic.

Just relax.

We just came here to help. We got a call.

Just back up.

If you could please turn off your lights.

- We got a call... - Got a psychiatric patient.

The lights are gonna make him really nervous.

Calm down, alright?

- I'm the president. - I know you are. You are.

I'm the president of the United States.

- We're just here to help. - He's having an episode.

Just back up. Back it up! Now.

Listen. But you gotta chill.

Just relax, okay? We got you.

- I'm the president. - I know.

- But you've gotta stay calm. - I'm the president!

- Please. - I'm the president!

- Calm down! - I'm the president!

I'm the president of the United States!

- Whoa! - No!

- I'm the president! - Hey, chill! Chill!

Calm him down.

No. Please. You do not have to do this.

- Ma'am, back up. - Okay.

Please, you've gotta put the guns down!

He's not a danger!

- I'm the president! - Now!

- Now! - Come on!

- I'm the president! - Calm him down, or I will!

- I will! Okay. - Right now! Or we will.

- Okay, let me-- - Right now!

Hey. Calm down.

Look at me. Calm-- You gotta calm down, man.

Please, please calm down for me.

Okay?

Please calm down. They don't give a fuck, man.

But I give a fuck, okay?

Hey, Mr. President.

Charlie.

I see you, okay?

I see you and I got you.

But you gotta calm down, okay?

I don't want anything to happen to you.

I won't let nothin' happen to you.

Just calm down. Okay?

Okay.

Hey...

As you can see, he's calmed down, okay?

I'm EMS.

That's our ambulance right there. We got him.

Okay? He's just havin' an episode today.

Alright?

Just put the guns down, alright?

Please.

Okay.

Alright.

Hey. Hey! Look at me.

I'm proud of you, man.

Thank you.

Thank you.

I'm good.

- This way. - Everything's fine, okay?

Just have a seat.

She's gonna belt you in, okay?

We can't take off until we get you belted in, okay?

I'm the president of the United States!

I'm the president of the United States!

I'm the president of the United States!

I can't fuckin' do the IV!

- Okay, I got it. Just breathe. - I can't get it!

I'm the president of the United States!

I'm the president of the United States!

Randy, can you do me a favor and maybe...

maybe keep the president calm for a little bit?

Yeah, I'm on it.

County ER, it's Medic 42.

Can I get a physician on?

Copy. Standby.

I need a doctor's permission to administer a sedative.

This is Dr. Serano. What?

Yeah, Dr. Serano, this is Paramedic Randy.

Currently en route to your facility,

and an emergent psychiatric patient.

Patient was uncontrollable at scene

and actively fighting the restraints.

Blood pressure 172 over 100.

Seeking two milligrams of atropine for sedation.

- Wait. - Atropine?

Yeah, for sedation. Yes.

Atropine?

Do you mean Ativan?

Are you trying to kill your patient, Paramedic Randy?

Fuck!

Ativan. Yes, Ativan.

Two milligrams for sedation.

ETA ten minutes.

Wonderful.

Try not to murder anyone on the way.

Fuck.

It had to be Serano. Fuck!

Shit! You scared me.

Oh, please.

Give me a fuckin' break.

Hey. You know, there are three other hospitals in this area.

Why don't you drop your patients in one of them, huh?

It's a busy night. It's not up to me.

You take care of what, one patient at a time?

I got 25 full beds in there, man.

I got a waiting room with an eight-hour wait.

I got emergency codes going off upstairs constantly.

I got an administration that won't hire enough staff,

and simultaneously tell me that I gotta be fuckin' nicer?

I gotta be nicer and I gotta be faster.

This whole building is on my shoulders, man.

And now, now I gotta take time to fix your mistakes.

Well, I got a better idea.

Maybe you take your bullshit patients

somewhere the fuck else.

Dr. Serano, come to emergency, please.

Well, you'll excuse me.

I gotta go back to never being done.

Alright, here we go.

- Let's go. - Watch this.

- Yeah. - Can you handle the heat?

I got it, playboy. Come on, now.

Oh!

- Whoo! - Oh, yeah?

- That's not a home run. - That's a home run, man.

You didn't even make it to the sidewalk.

Went right over your head.

The gutter is the home run line.

- That's bullshit. - Oh, shit. That ain't bullshit.

That's a fuckin' home run.

- Don't be a hater. - Go get your ball.

- I'm up. - No. What...

Know something? This is crazy that this is...

We been doin' this silly shit for three years now.

You gon' miss me?

Oh...

We're gonna see each other. We'll hang out.

What you mean? We don't hang out.

Yeah, we do. What are we doin' right now?

Dude, this don't count. We're at work.

- This is fun, friendship. - This is work.

- This is not hanging out. - This is...

This is EMS shit, man.

I don't know shit about you.

We don't even talk like that.

What type of shit you want me to ask?

Like, how's your mom doing? Or...

if your lawn is being tended to.

If you have a lawn. I don't even know...

My mom is dead and I don't have a lawn.

And... I don't know. What else?

Goddamn, man. We're just coworkers, man.

You act like I'm like your best friend or something.

Come on.

Pfft.

- Oh, shit, I'm your best friend. - Okay, who's up?

I have a lot of friends.

I have a lot of...

- lot of really... good friends. - Medic 42, respond.

- Damnit. I'm his best friend. - Medic 42 responding.

- That sucks. - You're not my best friend!

- Jerry's my best friend. - Who's Jerry?

- Who the fuck is Jerry? - Jerry's my cousin.

He lives in Tempe.

That's why we don't run.

Excuse us. Comin' through.

Excuse us. Thank you.

What happened?

Hit with a line drive in the chest and passed out.

- I got it. Thank you. - Are you his father?

No.

Uncle.

Do you know if he has any medical problems?

Problemas...

Yeah, none that he knows.

Did the AED shock him?

Yeah, twice now.

- Did he wake up at all? - No.

Let's hold CPR.

Okay, he's in V-fib.

Charging.

Okay. Clear.

- Clear. - Clear.

Okay, Mike, continue CPR.

How long was he down before you started CPR?

We thought he just had the wind knocked out of him--

- Yeah, how long exactly? - I don't know, maybe a minute.

Okay, that's good enough.

Ho!

We have a pulse.

- My chest hurts. - Oh. Hey, buddy.

What's his name?

Vicente, hey. My name's Randy,

and we're gonna be taking care of you, okay?

Hey, spike that for me?

Get a blood pressure.

Am I gonna die?

We're gonna do everything in our power

to make sure that doesn't happen.

Alright?

My chest hurts.

There's no easy way to say this, Vicente.

Your heart got hit with a baseball

and it stopped. That's why your chest hurts.

In the exact millisecond, your heart got hit

just as it was contracting.

It's like the ball reached out

and sucker-punched your heart.

It's a one-in-a-million chance.

And as a matter of fact, after all this,

I would go buy a lottery ticket if I were you.

So... am I gonna die?

You're with us now, and our job is to keep you healthy.

Okay? So just lie there and relax.

BP's 90 over 60.

Okay. That's not a bad start.

You're gonna feel a little sting.

Gonna get an IV started.

One, two, three.

Okay.

Now... you having any trouble breathing?

A little. My chest hurts.

Any pain anywhere else?

No. Not really.

You have any medical problems?

- No. - On any meds? Any allergies?

- No. - No? Okay.

- How old are you again? - Eleven.

- Are you married? - What?

- No. - I get it.

You're not ready to settle. You wanna play the field.

You wanna keep your options open.

That commitment is scary.

I get it. I'm with you. Pound it.

Boom.

I'm gonna call the hospital. You just lie there and relax.

So... am I gonna die?

You're gonna be alright.

Promise.

County ER, Medic 42.

Medic 42, this is County. Go ahead.

County, Medic 42 en route to your facility

emergent with 11-year-old patient post-cardiac arrest

due to a baseball to the chest.

Patient was down for approximately a minute

before receiving CPR.

Two shocks by AED, one by me.

Patient is in sinus tach.

Conscious, alert, oriented times three.

Blood pressure 90 over 60.

ETA approximately seven minutes.

County copies.

Medic 42 clear.

Hey, Vicente. So you're quite the baseball player, huh?

What position they have you playing?

My chest...

I feel funny.

Start CPR.

Charging.

- Clear. - Clear.

Clear.

County ER, Medic 42.

Medic 42, go ahead.

Update: Patient is back in cardiac arrest.

ETA two minutes.

- What do you need? - Let's get him outta here.

Comin' up.

Okay, we're good.

- Comin' through. - Comin'. Excuse us.

- Watch out. - What was his last pressure?

90 over 60. Pulse 110. About 20 breaths a minute.

He was fine and then just went right back into V-fib.

Eleven-year-old child, male,

hit in the chest with a baseball.

Was down for about a minute before they started CPR.

Shocked three times,

became alert and conscious three times.

Went back into V-fib, he was defibbed at 200.

One milligram of epi, shocked again,

second milligram of epi.

He's currently asystolic.

- Do we have a name? - Vicente.

That's all we have is Vicente.

You got half a name? Great work.

Hey.

Thought you'd wanna know. Your patient didn't make it.

Thanks, Colette.

Yeah, that sucks.

You were great with him, Randy.

No, I wasn't.

Yeah.

You were. You didn't make a single mistake.

It's not your fault.

You did nothing wrong.

I made a big fucking mistake.

I told the boy he was gonna live and he died.

It's a rookie fucking move, and I knew better.

But God damnit, he just kept...

asking and asking.

That boy died...

thinking I was gonna save him.

I have to live with that for the rest of my life.

And that's...

why we build a wall.

Not to keep people out

but to keep shit like that inside.

This job breaks everybody.

All we wanna do is save your life.

Oh! Shit!

Some of you...

don't make it easy.

You should be dead five times over...

but no matter how many times

you brush with death...

you refuse to die.

Respect.

Others of you, we do everything right...

and you die on us anyway.

What the fuck?

We see you struggling.

They can't deny you service...

but they can bankrupt you.

- Wait. Who had the blister? - She did.

You? Okay.

We carry you on our backs,

every one of us,

and you crush us a little more every day

until you grind us down to a nub.

This is all part of the job,

so you deal with it.

You compartmentalize it.

You eat shit and shove it down, down, down,

until one day you wake up and you say,

you know what?

Fuck the patients.

Fuck the nurses.

Fuck the doctors.

Fuck this ratty-ass hospital!

Fuck all the blood and shit and puke.

Fuck your documentation!

Fuck the fakers.

Fuck the bullshit calls.

Fuck every shoplifter who got caught

and pretended to pass out.

Ah!

- Come on. - Get up.

Fuck the fire department.

Fuck the PD.

I know my rights!

Fuck every 2:00 a.m. drunk who think they know the law.

Fuck the bystanders, the rubberneckers,

the lookie-loos.

Fuck the dead ones.

Fuck the live ones.

Fuck this bullshit pay.

Fuck me! Fuck you!

Fuck this job!

Fuck everyone,

except the kid who just wanted to play baseball.

Exit paperwork.

You don't have to sign it.

- I'm goin' home. - Randy...

Please don't go out like this.

Just leaving without even finishing your last shift?

Don't go out like a chump.

Mike, turn on the lights.

Randy, come on, now. You...

You know I can't do that unless we get a call.

Come on, man.

Alright.

One last time.

Medic 42, emergency traffic.

- You gonna answer that? - No.

Let another crew handle it. Just...

You know what? Drop me off at home.

What? Motherfucker, I don't know where you live.

Medic 42, respond.

I'll get it.

This is Medic 42 responding.

Come on, man. One more and you're done.

Hey, what the hell?!

Alright, you grab the stuff. I'll check this out.

- What the hell?! - I got you!

Where's PD to control these assholes?

Oh, whoa!

What the fuck?!

That's not good.

Fuck.

All dead in here.

Watch your step.

She's got a pulse.

She's breathing.

Shallow and ragged.

- Hold C-spine. - Okay.

Okay. Let's roll her on three.

One, two, three.

Grab the collar. Keep her breathing.

Oh, lucky...

lucky baby.

How'd you get so lucky? Huh?

Okay.

It's okay.

Hey-hey-hey-hey-hey-hey. Oh!

You're a lucky baby.

Stop that car! Whoa!

- Hey! Heads up! - Oh! Move!

Move!

Hey!

You almost killed us, asshole!

Hey, Jimmy. Take your truck, park it perpendicular,

- block that ramp. - Hold on. Wait. What?

Block off the whole fuckin' freeway!

No one gets through!

Oh, shit.

County, Medic 42. Do you have another unit incoming?

Negative. Next available unit is 15 minutes.

Want us to start a second unit?

Negative. We're taking the baby with us.

- Good lung sounds. - That's good.

A crying baby is a healthy baby.

Alright, switch with me.

Your job is airway.

Keep her breathing at all costs.

Let's see if she takes an OPA.

Yeah, she took it. No gag reflex.

Mom's got a lot of rib fractures and head lacs.

She's gagging on the OPA, but it's intermittent.

- Should I take it out? - Yeah, take it out.

She's had too much trauma already.

Talk to her. See if she can obey commands.

Miss, can you raise your right arm, please?

Alright, not bad. Hang on there, Mom.

Ma'am, you're in an ambulance.

You were in a pretty bad wreck. We have your child. She's okay.

We're taking you to the hospital.

County ER, this is Medic 42.

Incoming to your facility, emergent with two patients.

One a Level I, the other a stable pediatric.

Medic 42, be aware, we're on diversion.

We've got way too many patients here.

You'll have to take them to the ER at University.

Negative. Negative.

She will not make it to University.

Listen up. Got an approximately 30-year-old female,

a head-on collision, ejection, massive damage to vehicle.

What's their GCS?

Well, right now it's a 14, but...

Your patient doesn't meet Level I criteria.

Yes, she does!

Listen. We're gonna be there in five minutes,

so just page out a team.

Negative, 42, we are on diversion.

Do not come here, understand?

You need to reroute to a different ER.

We are coming there whether you like it or not!

So get ready for us!

- Hey, Astor? - Yeah?

- Wanna take that baby... - Got it.

...meet us inside?

Medic 42. What bay?

Two. But they're not happy.

Serano's on the warpath.

No one is happy.

No. No. No.

- Stop. - No. Doctor, listen.

- This is a 30-something-- - No!

- A head-on collision. - No. No. No.

The four other passengers are DOA.

She is not a Level I criteria.

Do you have any idea how expensive a Level I criteria is?

Any idea, you idiot?

Okay! This patient meets all Level I criteria.

She's not even intubated!

You got her bagged? What the hell is that?

This patient is dying, asshole!

- Now listen to my report! - Asshole?

How 'bout fuck you, asshole!

- Come on! - Shit.

I will be happy to kick your ass and put you in a bed next to her

but you need to listen to my report!

How 'bout this? How 'bout instead I call your supervisor,

we settle this right now.

Who the fuck do you think you are?

Excuse me?

- Who are you? - This patient just went apneic

three times with no gag reflex on the way to the hospital.

She's got a skull fracture.

She meets all Level I criteria.

Because last time I checked,

when a patient goes apneic with no gag,

their GCS goes down to three. Right?

And I just watched this paramedic fight like hell

to save this woman's life while caring for her child

and dodging incoming traffic at the same fucking time!

And all I see you doing is standing there,

like a fucking asshole, with your dick in your hand,

arguing with him about this patient

who is dying!

Your patient!

And if you refuse to treat her,

you'll lose your goddamn license.

Who are you?

I'm Dr. Romero. I'm your new resident.

Oh, shit.

Well, Dr. Romero...

I look forward to working with you.

We're gonna have so much fun.

Get the patient.

Okay, look.

You mean to tell me you're a doctor?

Resident, but yeah.

But you told us you were a paramedic.

No, I didn't. You said that.

I just didn't correct you.

I never said that.

That's what you said when we first met you.

No. Why would I? I'm a doctor, not a paramedic.

Hey, Dr. What's-your-face.

Grab a bedpan and come with me.

We're gonna have so much fun!

- Hmm. - Whoa.

That's...

Huh.

Hey.

Good news:

Patient's gonna live.

I mean, usually once we drop 'em off

it's not our problem anymore. But...

But it's good to...

it's good to know she made it, you know?

Yeah.

Way to throw yourself under the bus...

doctor.

Serano's gonna make your life a living hell.

I know.

I never wanna be that kind of surgeon.

Thanks for the coffee, doc.

She should have died.

She would have died in my care.

Right now, I'd be telling that family that their mom is dead.

You know, I thought I'd come out here today

and I'd meet the paramedics and...

see what you do, how you work.

And I know you're sick of your job.

I know you're burnt out.

I know you think you don't make a difference.

But you made a difference today.

You did.

You saved her life.

And you saved her family.

You're the kind of doctor I want to be.

Not a doctor.

Well...

if I ever need saving...

God, I hope it's you that shows up.

Hey, one of those is for Mike.

Not anymore.

That is a gift from the crews.

This is breakfast, on us.

Dispatch and the crews chipped in after they heard

you told Dr. Serano to go fuck himself.

So this is a retirement gift.

Wow.

Come on.

Aw.

Now, get out of my substation, civilian.

Keep your password safe.

If you have any trouble at all, call IT right away.

If you have any trouble with them, call me right away.

Okay.

Alright.

Now, to access the forms for the preauthorization...

You guys ever see anyone choke to death?

You get the fist like right under here,

and then it's just straight back.

Ha!

Drowning's the worst way to go.

Absolute worst way to go.

Best way to die?

Decapitation.

What are you still doin' here?

Oh. Is that it?

That's it.

Come on. Let's get outta here.

Hi.

So...

Well, as it turns out...

your close-out paperwork was never properly...

filed.

- Thanks. - Mm-hmm.

Hey, maybe I could...

thank you properly sometime.

Take you out for lunch.

Alright.

And you will be in truck 42 with Mike today.

Hey, Randy!

That's right.

Listen, man.

You gotta let me drive this one.

- Nope. - Mike.

Not a chance. You know the rules.

Okay? I wheel, you heal.

Come on, now. Ain't shit changed.

"Let me drive this one."

Yeah, the system is still broken,

but what am I supposed to do, quit trying?

I'm no hero.

But... the truth is...

I only feel alive when you're about to die.

See you out there.