Original subtitles

Conceived by PHOTON PROJECT

I, Keyne Aqua, have recently become the wife of Photon Earth.

I may be incompetent, but I will try hard to meet your approval.

Is this true, Photon-chan?

I will protect her. I promised.

My, you've become a fine adult, far from the little boy I knew.

You sure found a beautiful wife.

Right! We'll celebrate tonight!

I'm going to make the most special banquet!

Let's see... l'll make that for starters, that for dessert.

There are five people in all...

Oh?

I thought there was one more...

Photon-chan, will you fetch her?

I'll accompany you, Sir.

Aun, you're going to help me in the kitchen.

She used to be so beautiful.

Is it possible, when I get older, that I will also...?

No! Not that. I'd rather die!!

PHOTON

Papacha Turns

the Key

What the hell is this!?

Terrible food, no sake, no spa, and no women!

On what grounds must I endure such squalid conditions!

But, Sir, you tried to peep into the lady's spa and destroyed it.

So we were thrown out from that inn...

Don't you see I had profound and noble designs?

Is that so?

If only you had vaguely grasped my profound and noble designs...

and captured Keyne when you had the chance!

Then, a woman with a faintly cherry-pink complexion...

would have approached me with her wet, horny lips.

"Mercy! Your profound and noble allure is driving me crazy!"

...or so her moistened eyes would seem to say.

"I won't let you sleep tonight."

Right! That's the kind of nasal, sexy voice she would have...

Have you come all this way for a treasure hunt, Sir?

Chief Commander Bulan!

So, it was you who brought the princess here.

She insisted on helping you, her dearly beloved.

I must say too much adoration can be a nuisance.

But, why would you endanger your position to leave the Empire,

even at the request of the princess?

I was moved by her implicit affection for you.

Oh, I see. I never realized to what extent...

...she would go to see me.

By the way, Sir...

According to Professor Ma Gene Aqua's Laws of Aho Energy,

the Anti-Aho Furnace is found where the Singularity occurs.

What about it?

The revered Count that you are, you must surely know...

...that the Singularity exists on this planet?

Singularity?

The guy named Photon Earth, that is.

Photon... That punk?!

He is the core of Un-Aho?!

No wonder my Aho had no effect on him!

And here I thought your recent activities were meant to...

prove that theory...

You're exactly right!

Excuse me, Sir Papacha...

In all seriousness, Sir, what exactly is your strategy?

So long as Aho exists in the galaxy, so does Photon's power.

Calm down! Why do you think I am pursuing Keyne?

If I enable Professor Aqua's Anti-Aho Furnace,

I can shift the Singularity off its proper coordinates.

Then, that twit will be just another punk.

That is, if I can obtain the key to the Furnace...

Keyne is all I need to take care of that little punk!

- That makes perfect sense, Sir! - You're a genius!

Pa-Pa-Papacha! Pa-Pa-Pa-Pa-Papacha!

Naturally!

Take advantage of anything and everything!

If you love me that much, make yourself useful.

That's the least you can do, Lashara.

Sir Papacha.

Princess Lashara.

Sir Papacha is not who we thought he was.

He has acquired no less than thirteen wives already.

Pochini...?

The Count has made advances to you, Princess,

just so he could exploit your stature as a royalty.

I don't believe it!

I implore you, go back to your home planet.

No, I will not!

You're lying.

Pochini, if anybody should know my feelings, it's you.

How could you say such things?

What possessed you to come to this backward planet?

You trouble me, dear Princess.

Sir Papacha!

Nevertheless, I am pleased to see you again, Princess Lashara.

Sir Papacha!

Princess.

Are you pleased because I am the Galactic Emperor's daughter?

What did you say?

Please answer me, is it true you're already married...?

What have I done?

My career concerns have caused me to hurt your feelings.

Has my absence preyed on you to such distraction?

In this life, great men are often haunted by vicious remarks.

That you should be swayed by such unfounded rumors!

Rumors...?

I swear to the gods of heaven and earth.

The sparkle of this rose is the proof of my undying love.

Sir Papacha.

You must believe me, please.

Sir Papacha.

Sir Papacha... Can I... really believe you?

Say, there is one favor I'd like to ask you...

Lashara?

Sir, I don't think you would find her in there...

Princess Lashara!

- Oh... Photon-san. - Let's go back!

No! Let it go!

Princess Lashara?

You don't want?

Nee-san will get mad.

Forgive me. I didn't mean it.

I would gladly go with you.

Aren't you happy now, Photon-san? Come, Princess Lashara!

What's gotten into Photon? He's like a dog around that landlady.

As his wife, I can't help feeling a little jealous.

She is so... Still, she has big breasts...

But, that's beside the point...

Not too tough, are you? Oh, well.

One fewer rival to worry about.

The breasts are a measure of femininity, indeed.

At any rate, why is there a hot spring in a non-volcanic zone?

I hear there is a heat-producing site underground in the area.

The water is pumped up from there.

A heat-producing site?

Could it be that Grandpa's Aho System is still active...

and releasing its energy?

I'll be going now...

Boy, this place is crawling with magnum bodies...

I'm not like my sister. No way, no how!

Here is to celebrate my getting to know you all!

No formalities tonight!

Gosh, I am so honored to be a guest at your dinner party!

Stop crying and eat. Nee-san, your food is great!

Oh, good. Eat up then.

This is not snake meat, I hope?

Don't worry.

Here, honey, say "ah"...

Photon-san, you should eat this, too.

Not so fast, honey. Your face is stuffed!

Don't eat too much at once, Photon!

Why aren't you eating, Aun?

Eat?! Eat... you mean...

Get fat.

Hey, what's wrong, Aun-chan? The food is absolutely yummy!

Delicious!

Say, I was wondering, is it true what they say...

about a place underground that produces hot water in this area?

Oh, you mean the "Devil's Hot Spring"?

Devil's Hot Spring...?

Long ago, an explorer found a cavern that is now called...

"the God's Resting Place."

The story goes that this place is guarded by a shrine...

where no man can set foot.

That place could be the... No, that must be it!

That's got to be the one!!

I did it! I did it, Photon!

Ya-hoo! I really did it!

The destination: The Devil's Hot Spring!

Buckle up, everyone!

Go ahead, Photon.

You promised to protect her. Then, you must keep your word.

Sir Papacha. Keyne is on the move.

Where to?

East-southeast, point 45.

It's a limestone cavern called "God's Resting Place."

God's Resting Place?

What a fitting place to obtain the almighty power...

that will conquer the universe!

- Prepare to depart at once! - Certainly, Sir Papacha!

I shall finally see the treasure.

I'm counting on you, my dear Princess.

I guess we'll have to walk from here on.

Come on. Let's go.

Walk? No way!

Exercise shapes you up, y'know.

Then again, it may be too late.

But, if you tried...

Then again, the breast always goes first when you lose weight.

But...

- Don't tease me! - Hey! You ungrateful little...

The two of you, please stop!

Please stop fighting for my sake!

All right? Please?

Photon-san, please don't stray. You'll get lost!

You won't get away with this!

Nee-san.

Nee-san!

Photon-san, it's okay. That's only a doll.

It's not Nee-san... Oh, good!

I wonder how far we've fallen.

Let's hurry back, or we'll be separated for good.

- I will protect Keyne. - Let's go back.

I'm afraid I cannot let you through.

Princess Lashara!

Please, you must stay here and not make a fuss.

I will keep my word.

Please halt, or else...

Photon? Where are you, Photon?

How could he leave me alone with this obesity-prone woman?

In this desolate, claustrophobic cave, no less!

Hey, I heard that. You trying to jinx me?

Jinx? Isn't it fate?

Of course not! I won't end up like my sister. I'm different.

Maybe. Anyway, it's good that Photon's fond of you.

Why wouldn't he be?

It's like, he and I have been living together all these years.

It's not a matter of days as in your case. Ha ha ha.

True. Besides, Photon likes your FAT sister so much.

Photon! Where are you, FAT ladies' man?

I'm not like my sister!

Not yet.

Over there!

I'm sorry but I must do this for Sir Papacha.

If you insist on going, then...

- Don't! - Pochini!

Please stop, Princess Lashara.

Get out of my way. It's an order!

Why do you antagonize him? Please wake up!

Wake up?

Lashara, I know what you're trying to do.

By hurting Photon, you hope to erase your own doubts.

That is not like you, Lashara!

Is that what you think, knowing full well how I feel, Pochini?

I have no choice but to believe in him and execute his wishes.

If you stay here, you will know the truth.

Lashara...

What tremendous Aho energy! But how...?

Princess Lashara!

No, this isn't me! It won't stop...

I can't...

Princess... My dear Princess Lashara.

Sir Papacha!

You've served me quite well in separating Photon from Keyne.

But, alas, destiny is such a cruel thing.

Who would have imagined that those Aho rings are designed...

to explode at a preset time?

What happens to you then is anybody's guess...

Well, I'm sure you wouldn't mind it for your dearest Papacha.

What?!

Oh, no...

To you, the annoying obstacle to my ambitions: Adios and cheerio!

And, you too, Princess. Adios and cheerio!

Princess, rest assured, I hereby acknowledge your love for me.

So long.

Oh, no... Sir Papacha...

Why?

Photon-san!

Photon!

What are they?!

You just have to rub it in, huh?

Who do you think got us in this mess to begin with? What?

What's that over there?

That must be...

Wait up! What are you doing?!

Wait up! C'mon, Keyne!

Princess Lashara!

Pochini...

You...!

Sir Papacha...

I've always believed in him. And yet... he...

Lashara.

Why did you save me? Why me? I stood in your way and you...

Lashara, that's the kind of man Photon-san is.

He's given me something that I never had with Sir Papacha...

in all the years of my service.

Do you mean to say that you...?

He's been so kind to me and I liked the snake meat we shared.

That's all.

But, it really touched me.

I didn't know. Yet there I was, trying to...

It will make you feel better.

Oh, no, I couldn't possibly...

If you insist...

Here.

She laughed! Princess Lashara has laughed! All right!

Yeah! All right!

Thank you...

This must be it! Now, I'll know what Grandpa wanted to tell me.

Hey, wait up! Don't leave me out here!

What is this? Is this what you were looking for?

Now you know.

Relax. They're the robotic guards of this ship.

Robotic guards?

Come on. Take me to the system Grandpa left behind.

Er... hello?

What is this? What is going on?!

I don't think they like you.

Don't just sit there watching. Help me!

Should I or not? I mean, you've been making fun of me and all.

I was just kidding around. You know, a harmless joke!

Oh, well... I guess I should.

Oh, darn! You incapacitated my Aho, didn't you?

Oops.

C'mon! Hurry up!

Threaten a fool and you might make her useful...

What did you say? Can't you be a little grateful, you...!

There's tremendous energy in the air. I can feel it.

Koro-chan.

Wow!

- Keyne... Keyne Aqua. - Grandpa.

Keyne, my dear, I must tell you the truth.

Long ago, I developed a system that enables Aho to be used...

throughout the galaxy.

I believed Aho would be an agent of peace...

for the entire universe.

However...

One of my fellow researchers turned out to be a wicked man...

who wished to rule the galaxy by abusing that power.

He has gained enormous power by collapsing into the Singularity...

who contains Aho within his body.

He is the Galactic Emperor.

No!

Chin up, Keyne, my dear. My precious granddaughter.

Grandpa...

In order to restore Aho to its original state,

the program has to be modified within the Anti-Aho Furnace.

But it seems I won't be able to do it myself.

Instead, you must reprogram the system for me.

The system exists right here on Earth.

And the key that will enable the system is...

...You, Keyne!

Oh, no! Papachump!

The key... I am?

I don't like the look of the sky. It's ominous.

I am so sorry, Photon-san.

You shrew!

Oh, no! Shrew!

Hey!

Don't worry. I won't kill you.

You're the goddess that will help me fulfill my ambitions.

No way. I won't!

Lemme out!

You can't escape now, Keyne.

Help me...

Help me, Photon!

To be continued

NEXT EPISODE

Remember what I asked you the night we met?

"From now on, you'll protect me, too, won't you?"

I will protect Keyne. I promised.

Thanks, but I don't think I'll make it this time.

No!

My heart is leaving my body...

I will protect Keyne.

I'm beginning to doubt Photon.

- I will protect! - Photon!

I will protect you forever and ever!

Photon, the sixth episode: Photon on the Green Planet

Photon on the

Green Planet

Will you remain my husband even after I'm gone, Photon?

Yeah! A rival bites the dust!

Now this pretty-face will rise as the new heroine!

You're out of time, idiot!

No way!

There's nothing like love. That's what keeps me going.

My heart palpitates at the slightest omen.

Hard knocks. False alarms. Hunt by instincts.

What a trouble-maker.

Hold your breath. Will it be another unrequited love?

Another heartbreak...?

Bad feelings are creeping up on me again.

In times of trouble, I count on you to come flying to my rescue.

I'll be in love again tomorrow, just as usual.

You always make me feel safe, my lucky charm.

Isn't it the most important thing there is?