Original subtitles

Why don't you have a seat?

Why

don't

you have a seat?

According to your transcript, you're a 35 -year -old married woman.

That's not true.

That's not true because you're actually 37.

I fucking love that.

Why don't you have a seat?

Why don't you?

Be a dick.

We're doing a story on Predators, but with yourself.

Shut the fuck up.

Are you watching?

You're taking good fucking notes.

I expect you to do this to me.

Come on.

Well,

there's one problem with your story.

I had her chat transcripts.

Let's put an end to the charades.

I'm Chris Manson with Late Night SCV, and we're doing a story on ungrateful,

adulterous she -devils.

Well,

there's only one problem with that story.

I have your chat transcript.

She proceeded to protest her innocence until I pointed out what appeared to be

semen stain from a previous encounter on her skirt.

Why, that's absolutely absurd. I would never do such a thing. I'm a happily

married man. Really?

Because I have chest pain.

This is 37 -year -old Monica Delmonico, a schoolteacher from El Paso and wife to

a frequently cuckolded insurance broker husband.

Hi. Hey, come on in. I'm just finishing putting my comic books away. There's

cookies I made for you tomorrow.

Go have that.

Like all of these predators, she seemed apprehensive at first.

You never know if they're going to get spooked or suddenly grow a conscience

bolt for the door.

We almost lost this one on account of the chocolate cookies.

Really?

Chocolate cookies?

I told you I was on a low -carb diet.

And I'm vegan.

And diabetic.

Um, those are gluten and dairy free. And

sweetened with Splenda?

Why don't you have a seat?

Okay.

Sure thing, sir.

So, do you mind telling me what you're doing here?

Nothing.

I'm here to see my friend.

We were going to have cookies.

Cookies? Really? These cookies?

Here.

Why don't you try one? They look delicious.

No thanks.

No thanks because one bite will send you into an insulin shock and you won't be

able to seduce a young boy behind your husband's back if you're foaming at the

mouth on the floor.

Isn't that right?

I don't know what you're talking about.

Really? According to your chat transcript, you're a 35 -year -old

That's not true.

That's not true because you're actually 37.

You tell our decoy...

I'm in my sexual prime, and I need a young, hairless college boy to make me

like a woman again.

Our decoy says, and how can I do that? And you say, you know, by putting your

rock -hard blank in my sweet, warm, wet blank.

Did I fill in the blank for you?

Clearly, I was drunk. I don't remember that.

Drunk? Really?

You also say, give me your address. I'll swing by after my AA meeting.

Wow. Please don't tell my husband.

I don't typically do this kind of thing.

Well, admitting that you have a problem is the very first step.

She proceeded to tell me about dozens of similar encounters and that her vagina

has accepted more students than community college.

Look, I'm Chris Manson, and we're doing a story on shameless, promiscuous tramps

who seek the affections of younger boys in order to satisfy their own selfish

sexual desires.

Oh, I admit it.

I'm addicted.

Just let me do it one more time and I swear I'll never do it again.

I'm sorry, honey.

I'm sorry. I love you.

So very sad.

Rock, paper, scissors.

Fuck. Rock, paper, scissors.

Fuck. Whoa.

Oh, my God. I'm sorry. I've been so fucking horny.

I just don't fucking get it at home anymore.

Oh, my God. I'm so fucking horny. Oh, my God. I need some young chicken.

I can't fucking take them.

Fucking pull my panties off.

Yeah. Fucking pull me off.

Yes. Lick it, fucking pussy. It needs some fucking pop. It needs to... Yeah,

fucking lick it good.

Lick it good.

Lick it good.

Oh, fuck.

Fucking milk pussy. It's so fucking horny.

Oh.

Yeah.

Yeah, bitch, you're really fucking good. Get that little fucking... because

you'd come all over your face.

Oh,

my

God.

Oh, my God.

Oh,

my God, right there. I'm going to come all over your fucking face if you get

this.

Can I please step on your couch?

I'm so fucking horny to have you coming up.

Yeah, fuck my face.

fucking dick today.

fucking face what you put me yes for that fucking pussy oh my god

Fuck!

Yes!

Oh, my God.

Yeah.

Stay around my fucking little spot.

Yeah. Let me come on your car some more.

Don't fucking stop. Yeah, don't fucking stop.

Fuck me.

There you go. Fucking panda. Oh, fucking pussy.

Panda fucking good.

Just hang around.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Fuck.

Yes. Yes.

Yes. Yes.

Yeah,

you want to fucking cum so bad on my pussy, huh?

On my fucking chest.

Oh, my God, I love tasting my pussy.

Look at all that cum dripping down.

Fuck. Oh,

my God.

My big juicy tips.

Yes.

Yes. Yes.

Yes.

I fucking love that.

Oh, God.

I love when the fucking cock comes up to my mouth.

Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm. Oh,

yes. Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.

Fuck, these big juicy fucking limbs.

Mm -hmm.

Yeah. Fucking good.

Yeah, they don't ever get sucked at home

Fucking pussy. It's all yours.

Yeah, fucking shove me on your cock.

Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck.

Yeah.

Shove me down on your dick.

Yeah. Oh,

shit. Yeah, fucking rub that little fucking pussy. Oh, my God.

Oh,

my

God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. I love feeling your fucking cock through my ass.

Yeah. Feel your cock in my pussy and my ass.

Oh, my God. Like a dirty fucking slut. Oh, God. Yes, you are.

You are. Just go in both your holes.

Oh, my God.

Just go in.

Just like this.

Just like this.

Yes. Yes.

Oh my god, this is fucking perfect.

Fuck

yeah.

Shut up.

Oh, my God, yes.

Fuck.

Fucking God.

Oh.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Holy shit.

Holy shit.

Fuck, this is going to make me fucking cum. Oh, shit, I'm going to cum. Oh,

fucking cum. You can't take your asses off. Oh, fuck.

Come everywhere. Oh, my God.

Yeah.

Oh,

my God. Oh, my God. Oh,

yeah. Oh, my God.

And there are more potential predators

to confront. This woman is 35 -year -old Melinda Montgomery.

Her oblivious husband thinks that she's at the mall buying him a gift for his

birthday.

She goes by the screen name Who's Your Mommy 24.

She thinks she's chatting online with a 19 -year -old kickboxer named Helmut.

She says, so what do you look like?

My husband is flabby and soft.

It's like having sex with a beanbag chair.

I hope you're good looking.

Our decoy says, I like to keep myself in shape.

Also, I shave virtually every area of my body so that I'm smooth like a hairless

cat.

Hi. Hi. I just need five minutes to finish waxing the area between my

and my anus. I made you strudel. It's on the counter.

Help yourself, okay?

Oh, hi, honey.

Yeah, no, no, I'm not at the mall anymore. I'm at the, uh, bakery.

Yeah.

You like strudel, don't you?

This woman has no shame.

That strudel's filled with piping hot adultery.

Perfect.

Mm -hmm.

Yeah.

Uh, look, I really gotta go. Uh -huh, uh -huh.

What is true? Bye.

No, please.

Don't hang up on my account.

Um, no.

I must be in the wrong place. Let me just get out of here with my hair.

I'm pretty sure this is the house you were looking for.

Why don't you have a seat?

So, are you in the habit of wandering into strange houses, or is this your

first time?

Uh, I really thought this was my friend's new house. I just must have

these dresses.

Really? So your friend is an Austrian kickboxer who goes by the name Helmut.

Does your husband know about this friend?

I don't know anyone by that name. I thought this was my friend Ruthie's

And you expect me to believe that?

I was very much hoping that was a sufficient response.

Well, there's one problem with your story.

I have your chat transcripts.

You say, I've never had sex with an Austrian.

I want you to pretend that my blank is Poland and invade it with your rock

blank. Our decoy says, don't you feel guilty about cheating on your husband?

you say, the only thing I feel guilty about is not having smothered him to

with a pillow.

This woman is crazy.

I like that.

Let's put an end to the charade.

I'm Chris Manson with Lateline MCV, and we're doing a story on ungrateful,

adulterous she -devils who solicit young boys for sex over the Internet.

Oh, my God.

I'm so fucked.

Yes. Yes, you are.

Now, I'm obliged to inform you that you're free to go or stay and have sex

our decoy.

Is he really Austrian and smooth as a hairless cat?

Well, that'll be for you to ascertain.

I'm already busted, so I guess I might as well.

I'm sure he'll be very happy to hear that. Here, take some strudel.

Hi.

You must be Helmut.

Really?

Thank you.

Mmm.

Our next predator was perhaps the most aggressive and remorseless sexual

that we've ever encountered on this program.

Her screen name is Ballcrusher18.

She writes, Hey sexy, I hope you can handle an older woman who knows exactly

what she wants.

Our decoy responds, I'll do my best. I hope I can make you happy. To which she

says, I hoped a unicorn would fly into my bedroom when I was four, but then I

grew some balls.

Man up, bitch. I'm coming over.

Have any trouble finding the place?

No, I'm not quite today.

Good thinking.

Why don't you have a seat?

Why don't you eat a dick?

Okay. Do you mind if I ask what you're doing here today?

First of all, it's none of your fucking business.

And second of all, it's none of your fucking business.

She threatened to feed me my own testicles and made childish remarks

hair. This wasn't going well at all.

Do you mind if I ask what's inside the bag?

My favorite fuck me pump, a leather thong, and a dildo for my ass.

So you're freely admitting that your goal here today was to have sexual

relations with a younger man behind your husband's back.

My husband, you moron, is downstairs waiting in the car.

He knows exactly why I'm here.

And if his cock wasn't the size of a pencil eraser, I'd be home fucking

brownies right now.

Well, I was going to read your chat transcript, but I imagine you already

what's in them.

May I ask you something?

Certainly. Who the fuck are you?

Well, actually, I'm Chris Manson with Lateline NCB.

We're doing a story on predators such as yourself who prey on... Back the fuck

up!

So this is a setup?

I'm afraid so.

Listen, buddy.

If that dude with the pretty fucking teeth isn't back there getting ready to

fuck the shit out of me, I'm going to jam this dildo right up your ass.

Oh, decoy.

Put your helmet on.

Are you watching, pretty boy?

You better be taking a nice fucking close look.

This is how I'm going to warm my fucking self up for you.

Are you watching? You taking good fucking

notes? I didn't expect you to do this to me.

I don't know if this is going to be a little too much for you though.

Seeing it's your first time with me.

Have you ever seen something like that before?

You haven't, huh?

You think you can handle it?

Yes would be the correct answer.

Yes. Yes.

That's a very good boy.

We should start with the pussy.

I think you can handle the pussy.

We'll see.

We'll see if you get a gold star.

You should take your dick out and start stroking it.

Do it.

Get it fucking hard for me.

I don't want no limp dick. Come on.

I want to watch you. Yeah.

Just like that. Get it nice and fucking ready for me.

Come on, pretty boy. I know you got it in you.

I want it in me.

Real soon.

bodies that can keep up with me.

You think you can do the job?

What was that?

Yes ma 'am.

You're learning.

That would be a yes ma

'am. Yes ma 'am.

Hmm.

like watching the big

you a thing or two? Yes.

That's yes, ma 'am. Yes, ma 'am.

I want to ride this

cock like it's never been ridden before.

with mature women they have a lot of tricks up their sleeves

watch

this one

This is 42 -year -old college professor Miranda Wilmington.

She thinks she's here today to have a sexual liaison with a young and virile

student, but we're about to teach her a lesson.

She goes by the screen name HotForTeacher22.

She tells our decoy, hey cutie, I'm looking for a hot young stud for my

biology class.

Wow, I could use some extra help. My parents are so mad at me for flunking

of college.

I can't guarantee all your grades will improve, but you'll definitely get an A

in anatomy class.

Hey, have you been to Collins and the wine coolers?

Great, okay.

I'm going to be done with my homework in like five minutes. I'll just meet you

over there.

None of my teachers ever looked like that.

True. But today, she's here to teach a lesson in infidelity.

Kind of a bumpy road getting up here?

Uh, yeah.

Who are you?

Hmm. Kind of thirsty, huh?

I guess.

Why don't you have a seat?

There must be some mistake.

I thought this was a teacher's conference.

Not quite. Are you typically in the habit of bringing condoms and wine

to a teacher's conference?

I forgot the condoms. I mean, I don't have any condoms. And who doesn't enjoy

nice wine cooler every now and again?

Look, why don't we end this little game right now and you tell me exactly what

you're doing here.

I told you. I thought this was a teacher's conference.

Well, there's only one problem with that story.

I have your chat transcripts.

You tell our decoy, if my husband ever found out I was having sex with my

students, he'd have a stroke and die.

Maybe I should tell him.

LOL. Our decoy says, well, what kind of lesson do you have planned for me? And

you say, first you'll give me an oral presentation, and then I'll test your

skills in blanking the living blank out of me with your fully engorged blank.

Oh, look, hey, that was just talk. I mean, it's not like I'm going to do any

that.

Really? Because you also go on to say, I'm totally going to do all of that.

is not just talk.

I'm never lonely because I have a wide selection of student bodies on speed

dials. She proceeded to protest her innocence until I pointed out what

to be a semen stain from a previous encounter on her skirt.

Look, I'm Chris Manson, and we're doing a story on deceiving harlots who engage

in sexual liaisons with young boys.

Oh my gosh, is this going to be on TV?

husband. He's the dean of the college. If he finds out, I'll lose my job.

Well, you should have thought of that before you decided to let so many

admissions into your curriculum.

You see, I'm also good with euphemisms.

Now, you're free to go or stay and have sex with our decoy.

Is that going to be on TV?

Of course not.

This is a family program.

It's nice to touch a hard bar.

I did five sit -ups this morning.

Five? Five.

You're cute, too.

God,

I'm probably going to get fired for this.

Don't worry.

You can teach at community college.

Fuck, shut up.

I like community college.

Shut up.

I learned how to weld there.

That's my tip.

I'll find out at community college.

You remind me of my math teacher.

Yeah.

Young boys like teachers.

She was 26 days ago.

I like you young guys.

Fucked up, but it's a good one.

Yeah, yeah,

yeah, yeah

Mmm.

Oh, fuck.

Oh,

fuck.

Yes. There you go.

Yes.

Yes. Yes. Yes.

Yeah, you gonna make it worth it? Yeah.

Oh, fuck it, yeah, just like that. Just like that.

Yeah, yeah.

Fucking drill that pussy good, come on. Come on.

Come on.

Come on. Get it deep, eh?

Get it fucking deep.

Yeah.

I feel the ball flapping around.

Come on.

Come on.

Come on.

Just like that. Just like that.

Just like that.

Yeah. Yes.

Yes.

She's on fucking fire, really.

Thank you.

Yes.

Come on, come on, come on.

Breathe to me, breathe to me, breathe to me.

Yes,

there you go.

There you go.

That's good.

That's good.

Oh, God.

Oh,

God, yes.

Fucking God, come on. No.

Fuck me. Fuck me.

Yes.

Come suck. Come suck. Yes, come suck. Come suck. Come suck.

Yes, there you go.

Yes.

I think you've got some more in here.

what type of house you're looking for.

If you're looking for a house with 15 hidden cameras in it, then yes, you're

the right place.

Why don't you have a seat?

Okay, are you Chris Manson?

We'll get to who I am in just a minute.

You still haven't answered my question.

I'm a Russian mail -order bride, and you send me 2 ,000 rubles.

Why, that's absolutely absurd. I would never do such a thing. I'm a happily

married man.

Really? Because I have a check transcript.

You send.

Listen here, Ruski. I'm a famous American broadcaster and I want to spray

blank all over those natural blanks.

Again, that's absurd. Someone must have hacked into my computer pretending to be

me. I am a happily married man.

You also say just in case you think I'm lying about who I am. Here is a picture

of my driving lesson alongside my fully erect penis.

I believe it was erect penis.

Whoever wrote that.

It is.

You also say we can use one of the houses where I tape my show.

My wife won't suspect anything if she thinks I'm at work.

Yes, okay, wow. I believe it's all coming back to me now.

I'm obliged to tell you, you're free to go, so you should probably go now.

And you complain about your wife.

You say she sucks cock like a reptile.

I think I said good.

She does. Can we maybe shut the cameras off?

Oh, wait, there is more.

Then you ask whether I would be willing to thank you and tell you

that you are grounded.

I said shut those fucking cameras off!

Well, I just gotta make sure that my crew destroys those tapes.

First, let me see what I paid for here.

I love you.

Yeah.

You want to see my boobs, right?

I do.

Indeed.

Worth

every

ruble.

How are you?

Much

better

than my wife.

This is why I'm here, right?

back to me.

Come on.

I'm firmly glad that the iron curtain has fallen.

Yes, come right over here. Let me get a closer look at you.

So tiny.

You could order, right?

Oh,

yeah, don't

stop.

Oh, my God.

Oh,

that is beautiful.

Let me just give it a look.

I'd like you to... Oh, yeah?

Suck my cock, but not like a reptile, please.

Oh, thank you to me.

I'm going to fill in my...

Why don't you have a seat right here?

Like a dad?

Like this.

I can play with your cuddling, Dad.

Yes, yes.

Like this.

Yes. You love it, you love it. I love it.

I love it.

Why don't you have a seat?

Yeah.

Thank you.

Thank you.

You want this? You want this?

You want this? You want this?

You want this?

You want this? You want this?

You want this?

You want this?

This one is going to be too tight right now.

Too tight.

You see?

See how tight?

This is tight right now.

Right now, it's been tight the whole time. Yeah.

Heh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh

And you expect me to believe that.