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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,043 --> 00:00:02,395 NARRATOR: Previously on "Wynonna Earp"... 2 00:00:02,419 --> 00:00:03,419 SHE LAUGHS 3 00:00:04,046 --> 00:00:05,253 LOUD SHRIEK 4 00:00:05,339 --> 00:00:07,422 WOMAN: This is... - DOC:...Bulshar's ring. 5 00:00:08,050 --> 00:00:09,382 Gift. May it protect you 6 00:00:09,468 --> 00:00:10,675 in your upcoming battle. 7 00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:13,656 JEREMY: I just wanna read the signals. - ROBIN: I wanna try something. 8 00:00:13,680 --> 00:00:15,342 I need you so bad it hurts. 9 00:00:15,432 --> 00:00:17,048 Now we're linked together forever. 10 00:00:17,142 --> 00:00:18,383 No strings. 11 00:00:19,228 --> 00:00:21,060 You are abandoning your family. 12 00:00:21,146 --> 00:00:23,934 Like I'm gonna let a vampire lecture me on love. 13 00:00:24,233 --> 00:00:27,476 John Henry Holliday, you're not welcome in my home anymore. 14 00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:32,943 ROCK MUSIC PLAYS 15 00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:35,116 What you wanna do is aim right of the placenta stain 16 00:00:35,202 --> 00:00:36,429 which should drive the seven ball 17 00:00:36,453 --> 00:00:38,695 straight into the corner pocket-slash-stirrup. 18 00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:41,201 HE SIGHS 19 00:00:41,542 --> 00:00:43,408 This is why no one will play with us. 20 00:00:43,794 --> 00:00:46,207 Can we at least pretend you didn't give birth on this table? 21 00:00:46,338 --> 00:00:49,081 That's not even the grossest thing that's happened on this felt. 22 00:00:49,424 --> 00:00:51,224 As in, you might want to lift your chin a bit. 23 00:00:51,385 --> 00:00:52,421 OK, yeah. 24 00:00:52,636 --> 00:00:55,299 If only someone had the pull to talk Doc into buying a new table. 25 00:00:55,514 --> 00:00:56,425 Hard pass. 26 00:00:56,515 --> 00:00:58,757 Kate's the only one pulling that ass-chap these days. 27 00:00:58,850 --> 00:01:00,432 Ah, sorry, that sucks. 28 00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:01,974 Doc's a hard thing to lose. 29 00:01:02,813 --> 00:01:04,270 This is not a "lose" situation. 30 00:01:04,356 --> 00:01:07,770 This is a "you're welcome to the moustache thigh burns if you want him" offer. 31 00:01:07,859 --> 00:01:09,816 Well, actually, I am, uh, taken. 32 00:01:09,945 --> 00:01:11,902 And my guy only has a fraction of Doc's PTSD. 33 00:01:13,156 --> 00:01:14,522 How is lil Christopher Robin? 34 00:01:14,616 --> 00:01:16,323 Still patrolling the Hundred Asshole Wood? 35 00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:18,572 Look he's fine, and I wanna keep him that way. 36 00:01:18,870 --> 00:01:19,973 That means I've moved things 37 00:01:19,997 --> 00:01:22,580 to an exclusively text-based relationship for the moment. 38 00:01:22,666 --> 00:01:23,702 Mm. OK. 39 00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:26,326 My advice is to squeeze all the juice out of that lemon 40 00:01:26,420 --> 00:01:29,504 while it's still ripe, before he does something stupid like... 41 00:01:30,882 --> 00:01:32,464 you know, become a va... 42 00:01:33,885 --> 00:01:36,548 Vandalizer of your heart. - JEREMY: OK. Wow. 43 00:01:36,847 --> 00:01:38,930 You're... You're giving me dating advice? Really? 44 00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:40,431 Just stuff it, Chetri. 45 00:01:40,517 --> 00:01:42,634 Just call Smokeshow the Bear and ask him on a date. 46 00:01:42,853 --> 00:01:46,847 You know, before the world ends or he starts fang-banging his old wife. 47 00:01:47,149 --> 00:01:49,869 Yeah, I don't think that's going to be an issue for us but thank you. 48 00:01:50,235 --> 00:01:51,271 WYNONNA GASPS 49 00:01:52,654 --> 00:01:55,146 Think I lost an umbilical cord around here somewhere. 50 00:01:55,365 --> 00:01:58,165 Don't you mean your dignity? - FIREMAN: Hey, buddy. Can I get a whisky? 51 00:01:59,661 --> 00:02:00,902 FIREMAN: Yeah. No, not that one. 52 00:02:01,330 --> 00:02:03,290 Yeah. Is this about your friend with the big hose? 53 00:02:03,332 --> 00:02:04,932 He sent me three texts and I ghosted him. 54 00:02:05,167 --> 00:02:07,784 What happened to squeezing his lemons? - I don't know. 55 00:02:09,671 --> 00:02:11,128 Hey, Charlie? Hey, uh... 56 00:02:11,465 --> 00:02:13,252 There is something hot under this table 57 00:02:13,342 --> 00:02:14,819 and you might wanna... - WYNONNA: Shut up! 58 00:02:14,843 --> 00:02:16,675 ...hose that down with your big old hose! 59 00:02:16,762 --> 00:02:17,843 No more hose jokes. 60 00:02:18,305 --> 00:02:19,466 OK. see ya. - Wait. 61 00:02:20,599 --> 00:02:23,182 Take this thing and lock it in a thing inside of another thing 62 00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:25,927 so I can just forget about it and the damned vandalizer. 63 00:02:26,396 --> 00:02:27,436 Good luck hosing the deal. 64 00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,021 SHE GRUNTS 65 00:02:35,113 --> 00:02:36,445 So... - WYNONNA: So... 66 00:02:38,784 --> 00:02:39,820 I got your message... 67 00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:41,988 ...ges. - Yeah, I know. 68 00:02:42,079 --> 00:02:44,617 I... I got yours, loud and clear. You said no strings. 69 00:02:44,706 --> 00:02:46,666 And you're really busy shooting supernatural shit. 70 00:02:47,042 --> 00:02:48,704 Well, not so busy I don't have to eat. 71 00:02:51,755 --> 00:02:54,338 And sometimes when I eat, I like to look at things... 72 00:02:54,424 --> 00:02:55,915 Nice things... Nice faces. 73 00:02:57,719 --> 00:02:58,755 HE LAUGHS 74 00:02:59,471 --> 00:03:01,087 Dinner? - Yeah, I'd love to do dinner. 75 00:03:01,640 --> 00:03:02,640 I mean, if you're sure? 76 00:03:04,142 --> 00:03:06,429 Did Shorty once cover this entire thing in pulled pork? 77 00:03:07,479 --> 00:03:08,639 I don't know. - LAUGHING: Yes. 78 00:03:21,243 --> 00:03:23,030 CRUMBLING 79 00:04:00,449 --> 00:04:02,111 Do not fail me this time. 80 00:04:08,707 --> 00:04:09,743 Fetch! 81 00:04:09,833 --> 00:04:10,869 WOMAN BREATHES HEAVILY 82 00:04:39,446 --> 00:04:40,482 DOC: Countessa? 83 00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:45,403 Kate? 84 00:04:46,536 --> 00:04:47,777 KATE: Bon appétit, darling. 85 00:04:48,914 --> 00:04:49,950 DOC: What is this? 86 00:04:50,707 --> 00:04:53,040 KATE: A succulent filet of jackass. 87 00:04:55,670 --> 00:04:58,208 You kidnapped him. - It's a gift. 88 00:04:59,007 --> 00:05:00,464 I know how hard it is at the start 89 00:05:00,967 --> 00:05:01,967 so... 90 00:05:03,637 --> 00:05:04,673 here. 91 00:05:11,061 --> 00:05:14,680 You may have made me what I am, but that does not make you my mistress. 92 00:05:15,273 --> 00:05:17,230 I hunt for myself. I always have. 93 00:05:18,026 --> 00:05:19,642 Find yourself another occupation. 94 00:05:21,238 --> 00:05:22,319 I am not yours. 95 00:05:24,157 --> 00:05:25,193 You used to be. 96 00:05:34,709 --> 00:05:35,709 He knows I'm here. 97 00:05:36,294 --> 00:05:37,294 Who knows who's here? 98 00:05:39,381 --> 00:05:40,417 HE SNEERS 99 00:05:40,549 --> 00:05:44,384 Hey bitch, I like it kinky but I gotta take a whiz. 100 00:05:53,144 --> 00:05:54,680 SHE GROWLS - HE SCREAMS 101 00:06:02,654 --> 00:06:03,815 ROBIN: What should I wear? 102 00:06:03,905 --> 00:06:06,363 Should... Should I bring crackers, you know, nuts, cash? 103 00:06:06,449 --> 00:06:07,489 JEREMY: None of the above. 104 00:06:07,659 --> 00:06:09,366 It's just a super-cazh BGD. 105 00:06:09,536 --> 00:06:10,401 ROBIN: BGD? 106 00:06:10,495 --> 00:06:11,611 Big gay dinner. - ROBIN: Oh. 107 00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:12,991 Yeah, Waverly's a great hostess. 108 00:06:13,206 --> 00:06:15,243 ROBIN: Yeah. You know, I'm just excited, you know? 109 00:06:15,333 --> 00:06:16,519 The last time I ate with a group 110 00:06:16,543 --> 00:06:19,286 some zombie beekeepers were tossing raw chicken skins into cages. 111 00:06:19,379 --> 00:06:21,120 TENSE MUSIC 112 00:06:26,177 --> 00:06:27,918 HE PANTS AND GROWLS 113 00:06:31,308 --> 00:06:33,641 Yeah, I wanted to ask, This whole Earp curse thing? 114 00:06:33,935 --> 00:06:36,678 It's... a rumour, right? A family joke? 115 00:06:37,856 --> 00:06:40,189 Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Totally. Totally. Like um... 116 00:06:40,275 --> 00:06:43,155 Um, how those kids on Party of Five pretended to be orphans for sympathy. 117 00:06:43,778 --> 00:06:45,189 Well, they were orphans, Jeremy. 118 00:06:45,280 --> 00:06:46,646 What? Spoiler alert! 119 00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:48,990 Hey, so we need to be there for seven for pre-drinks 120 00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:50,515 and then we're gonna have mid-drinks 121 00:06:50,577 --> 00:06:52,409 and then we're gonna have post-drinks. 122 00:06:52,662 --> 00:06:55,200 It's gonna be, uh... Well, easy-breezy. 123 00:06:55,290 --> 00:06:57,828 DOC PANTS 124 00:07:03,006 --> 00:07:04,213 Robin. Are you still there? 125 00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:07,166 DOC ROARS LOUDLY 126 00:07:07,385 --> 00:07:08,385 HE SCREAMS 127 00:07:08,511 --> 00:07:09,547 Robin! 128 00:07:09,804 --> 00:07:11,011 HE SCREAMS 129 00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:14,348 DOC: Do not panic. He is still alive. 130 00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:15,914 Hey, you know, Doc, when we met before 131 00:07:15,977 --> 00:07:19,470 I didn't see what you are: Perfect. He smells like sex tobacco. 132 00:07:19,648 --> 00:07:20,889 What the hell is going on? 133 00:07:21,483 --> 00:07:22,483 Wait. 134 00:07:25,403 --> 00:07:27,395 Oh my God, what is wrong with you? 135 00:07:28,239 --> 00:07:30,856 Holy shit. You had Kate turn you. 136 00:07:33,411 --> 00:07:34,451 You could have killed him. 137 00:07:34,955 --> 00:07:36,742 He tastes of rancid earth. Foul. 138 00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:39,536 I wonder if he is ill. - No, no. You bit him! 139 00:07:39,626 --> 00:07:42,744 You don't get to decide who's ill, even if your name is Doc! 140 00:07:42,837 --> 00:07:43,918 I brought him here 141 00:07:44,923 --> 00:07:47,085 to make it as right as I could under the circumstances. 142 00:07:47,258 --> 00:07:48,920 If this is you making things right? 143 00:07:50,345 --> 00:07:51,881 No wonder Wynonna's moving on. 144 00:07:58,645 --> 00:07:59,681 Now so am I. 145 00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:01,516 Adiós. 146 00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:06,146 Good. Yeah. Go feed on someone your own size! 147 00:08:11,616 --> 00:08:12,652 SOFTLY: Hey. Hey. 148 00:08:13,618 --> 00:08:15,780 Hey, hey. Hey, did I miss Big Gay Dinner? 149 00:08:18,081 --> 00:08:20,118 Did that albino squirrel go all aggro again? 150 00:08:20,917 --> 00:08:21,953 GROANS 151 00:08:24,295 --> 00:08:26,582 Uh, we'll have the chicken balls, the eggs benedict 152 00:08:26,673 --> 00:08:29,040 and the Great Wall spaghetti and meatballs. 153 00:08:30,135 --> 00:08:31,135 Namaste. 154 00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:36,930 CHARLIE: So, this is Purgatory's finest restaurant? 155 00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:41,515 They have breadsticks and knives that look like tiny swords. 156 00:08:42,230 --> 00:08:43,391 Five stars! - Yeah. 157 00:08:47,944 --> 00:08:49,664 So what was it like growing up in Purgatory? 158 00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:52,800 Well, I could tell you how shooting my dad put a damper on things 159 00:08:52,824 --> 00:08:56,033 but that would probably put a damper on this fancy feast we're having too. 160 00:08:56,453 --> 00:08:57,453 Ha. 161 00:08:59,914 --> 00:09:02,554 Basically I don't know how I thought a dinner date was a good idea. 162 00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:04,867 CHARLIE: Well, you kinda surprised me with that one too. 163 00:09:05,128 --> 00:09:07,128 I mean, I was... I was promised a genuine hot mess. 164 00:09:07,172 --> 00:09:09,755 So far all I see is a smart, beautiful sass mouth with some... 165 00:09:10,425 --> 00:09:11,425 Some butter on her chin. 166 00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:18,513 Bad shit follows me around everywhere. 167 00:09:20,143 --> 00:09:22,806 I run into burning buildings. Willingly. 168 00:09:23,271 --> 00:09:24,853 OK, but I'm kind of like the Batman. 169 00:09:25,356 --> 00:09:26,688 OK, but I'm Lego Batman 170 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:28,920 except for being all smooth down there. 171 00:09:29,861 --> 00:09:30,897 HE CHUCKLES 172 00:09:31,321 --> 00:09:33,563 CHARLIE: So when it comes to Fake Hot Mess Wynonna 173 00:09:34,365 --> 00:09:37,358 all I can say is, buckle up, Buttercup. 174 00:09:39,162 --> 00:09:41,245 That... didn't sound right. 175 00:09:41,790 --> 00:09:42,906 KNOCKING 176 00:09:43,166 --> 00:09:44,202 LOUDER KNOCKING 177 00:09:47,879 --> 00:09:49,836 Can you excuse me por uno momento. 178 00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:51,292 Sure. Yeah. 179 00:09:54,469 --> 00:09:55,334 What the hell, Jeremy? 180 00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:56,739 You do not interrupt a girl's bread course! 181 00:09:56,763 --> 00:09:59,255 OK. Doc is not a vandal, he's a vampire! 182 00:10:00,225 --> 00:10:02,065 And do you want to know how I figured that out? 183 00:10:02,102 --> 00:10:03,329 I'm betting you're gonna tell me. 184 00:10:03,353 --> 00:10:04,913 Because he bit my maybe kinda boyfriend. 185 00:10:05,230 --> 00:10:07,347 I haven't even bitten my maybe kinda boyfriend yet! 186 00:10:08,691 --> 00:10:09,691 Is Robin OK? 187 00:10:09,943 --> 00:10:12,481 Yeah, he's fine. He's gonna be fine. He's not gonna turn. 188 00:10:13,822 --> 00:10:14,903 Plus, he was glamoured 189 00:10:14,989 --> 00:10:17,109 so he thinks he was bitten by a Caucasian tree rodent. 190 00:10:17,659 --> 00:10:19,525 But you know, you remember the part 191 00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:21,702 about me wanting to keep him safe and PTSD free? 192 00:10:22,872 --> 00:10:24,408 This calls for a whole lotta wood. 193 00:10:24,582 --> 00:10:26,073 Wait, no... What are you gonna do? 194 00:10:26,417 --> 00:10:28,079 What I always do: fix it. 195 00:10:29,546 --> 00:10:30,582 JEREMY WHISPERS: Yes! 196 00:10:31,089 --> 00:10:32,942 Remember the time you said "buckle up, buttercup"? 197 00:10:32,966 --> 00:10:34,485 For the record, I'm... I'm the buttercup. 198 00:10:34,509 --> 00:10:36,796 Well, date night has officially become stake night 199 00:10:37,554 --> 00:10:40,262 as in vampire, not filet. You in? 200 00:10:41,724 --> 00:10:42,931 I filled up on bread anyhow. 201 00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:45,394 Good. 202 00:10:46,229 --> 00:10:47,345 I got your text. 203 00:10:49,315 --> 00:10:50,806 Wynonna, I am sorry. 204 00:10:52,694 --> 00:10:55,107 In the haze of the forest I did not recognize him 205 00:10:55,196 --> 00:10:56,396 and I brought him to Jeremy... 206 00:11:02,787 --> 00:11:03,618 Argh! 207 00:11:03,705 --> 00:11:05,788 You can try but that rope's soaked in holy water. 208 00:11:06,499 --> 00:11:07,535 DOC: Who did this? 209 00:11:09,085 --> 00:11:10,201 Wynonna? - CHARLIE: Yeah. 210 00:11:11,045 --> 00:11:14,083 She wanted to discuss a few things with Kate without you interrupting. 211 00:11:16,009 --> 00:11:17,170 I'm getting good at that. 212 00:11:17,594 --> 00:11:20,052 Oi! Lady bloodsucker, show yourself. 213 00:11:20,930 --> 00:11:21,930 Oh shit. 214 00:11:22,807 --> 00:11:25,568 I was wondering when you'd pop in. - Why do you get a better entrance? 215 00:11:26,060 --> 00:11:27,460 Been working on them for a century. 216 00:11:29,022 --> 00:11:30,124 NICOLE: Hello! - JEREMY: Hey! 217 00:11:30,148 --> 00:11:31,148 NICOLE: Come on in! 218 00:11:31,399 --> 00:11:33,857 WAVERLY: Welcome! Hi! - JEREMY: How are you? 219 00:11:33,943 --> 00:11:35,684 NICOLE: Ooh, it's cold outside! - I know! 220 00:11:36,571 --> 00:11:37,937 How are you? - Yeah. I got bit. 221 00:11:38,239 --> 00:11:39,821 Um... - You got bit? 222 00:11:39,908 --> 00:11:41,274 ROBIN: Yeah. - Oh, uh... 223 00:11:41,367 --> 00:11:44,951 He got a bit cold... He got a bit cold on his rounds. 224 00:11:45,038 --> 00:11:45,949 Mm-hm. 225 00:11:46,039 --> 00:11:47,951 Poor Robin, come with me. Yeah. 226 00:11:48,041 --> 00:11:50,158 Uh, listen, I'm so behind schedule with the food. 227 00:11:51,377 --> 00:11:53,039 Oh, is that for me? - Wine, yeah. Yeah. 228 00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:55,337 Thank you. Listen, how do you feel about potatoes? 229 00:11:55,423 --> 00:11:56,834 Oh, I find them very a-peeling. 230 00:11:56,925 --> 00:11:58,257 OK, uh, take care of him! 231 00:11:58,509 --> 00:12:00,669 NICOLE: Hey, lemme grab your coat. - Uh, oh, yes. Sure. 232 00:12:01,012 --> 00:12:03,470 Oh. OK. What up? What app? 233 00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:06,139 Uh, any apps? You making any appetizers? 234 00:12:06,226 --> 00:12:08,309 Uh, wow. You're really nervous. 235 00:12:08,394 --> 00:12:10,260 Jeremy it's just dinner. It's mostly drinks. 236 00:12:10,355 --> 00:12:12,688 Yeah, but you... You only get crowned sheriff once. 237 00:12:12,982 --> 00:12:14,314 Am I right? Do you get a crown? 238 00:12:14,609 --> 00:12:16,521 Is... Is there a crown? That would be great. 239 00:12:16,611 --> 00:12:18,211 Hey, have you heard from Wynonna at all? 240 00:12:20,531 --> 00:12:21,647 Your husband bit someone 241 00:12:22,825 --> 00:12:24,487 an innocent person, a friend. 242 00:12:25,370 --> 00:12:26,406 He was hungry. 243 00:12:27,330 --> 00:12:29,530 That's the price we pay for having Doc forever and ever. 244 00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:31,115 I don't remember ordering that. 245 00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:32,571 You're blaming his choices on me? 246 00:12:33,503 --> 00:12:35,586 And here I thought you were the progressive type. 247 00:12:35,672 --> 00:12:37,959 Sexy lady vampire isn't exactly 248 00:12:38,049 --> 00:12:40,166 hashtag modern feminism either. 249 00:12:41,135 --> 00:12:42,613 You tricked him. Like you did before. 250 00:12:42,637 --> 00:12:47,723 You seduced him with your designer vampire pheromones. 251 00:12:48,393 --> 00:12:50,476 That's what you think. For real? 252 00:12:53,690 --> 00:12:54,851 Laugh while you still can. 253 00:12:54,941 --> 00:12:56,701 I'm gonna shoot you through your undead heart 254 00:12:56,734 --> 00:12:57,895 and give Doc back his soul. 255 00:12:59,112 --> 00:13:00,569 Come on. The whiskey's warm. 256 00:13:00,989 --> 00:13:01,900 You monster. 257 00:13:01,990 --> 00:13:04,698 You should at least get to know a lady before you try to kill her. 258 00:13:04,826 --> 00:13:07,534 It's a good story. - Well, I'm sort of over stories. 259 00:13:07,912 --> 00:13:09,699 Doc is the one responsible for turning me. 260 00:13:10,373 --> 00:13:12,786 You said you'd always been a vampire. - I lied. 261 00:13:16,587 --> 00:13:17,623 Fine. 262 00:13:18,506 --> 00:13:21,169 But if you start doing voices, I'm shooting us both. 263 00:13:23,303 --> 00:13:24,589 My family is from Europe. 264 00:13:25,555 --> 00:13:27,512 And we weren't vampires, we were nobility. 265 00:13:28,933 --> 00:13:30,140 And girl, don't look shocked. 266 00:13:31,269 --> 00:13:32,510 We all know who wrote history 267 00:13:33,104 --> 00:13:35,517 and how they have a habit of leaving people who look like me 268 00:13:35,606 --> 00:13:37,188 out of official records. 269 00:13:38,651 --> 00:13:40,142 KATE: We came looking for liberty. 270 00:13:40,486 --> 00:13:42,603 We found a cesspool. 271 00:13:43,489 --> 00:13:45,526 Both my parents died soon after we arrived. 272 00:13:46,117 --> 00:13:49,076 I was supposed to return to Hungary and my creepy Uncle Otto. 273 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:51,366 But I knew what he was. 274 00:13:52,206 --> 00:13:53,242 I knew a lot of things. 275 00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,000 It was a useful talent. 276 00:13:55,752 --> 00:13:57,914 Now, this card represents the past. 277 00:13:59,714 --> 00:14:01,546 This one, the present. 278 00:14:04,510 --> 00:14:05,671 And this... 279 00:14:08,931 --> 00:14:10,211 You'll be engaged within a year. 280 00:14:11,809 --> 00:14:12,809 Oh, thank you. 281 00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:14,222 Welcome. 282 00:14:14,562 --> 00:14:16,895 KATE: Then one evening, I met a man I refused to read. 283 00:14:18,107 --> 00:14:19,894 It wasn't that I couldn't read his future 284 00:14:20,401 --> 00:14:21,401 It's that I wouldn't. 285 00:14:22,195 --> 00:14:23,356 MAN: Do it! - I won't. 286 00:14:24,822 --> 00:14:27,109 DOC: The lady said no. 287 00:14:27,658 --> 00:14:29,741 MAN: This is no business of yours. 288 00:14:31,120 --> 00:14:32,520 I have this aimed at your business. 289 00:14:33,289 --> 00:14:34,325 Take your money and go. 290 00:14:49,347 --> 00:14:50,347 Sir, wait. 291 00:14:53,601 --> 00:14:54,601 May I buy you a drink? 292 00:14:55,353 --> 00:14:59,723 Now, what heartless bastard could deny you a thing? 293 00:15:03,861 --> 00:15:04,897 Barkeep. 294 00:15:08,282 --> 00:15:09,693 WYNONNA: Doc to the rescue, huh? 295 00:15:10,576 --> 00:15:12,283 You paint quite a pretty picture. 296 00:15:12,370 --> 00:15:13,906 Well, it gets a lot less pretty. 297 00:15:14,163 --> 00:15:16,325 Say what you want about John Henry Holliday. 298 00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:18,790 He's never boring. 299 00:15:20,044 --> 00:15:23,287 How did you end up taking a bite out of this kid anyhow? 300 00:15:23,423 --> 00:15:26,086 Oh, let me loose, and I'll give a demonstration. 301 00:15:26,259 --> 00:15:30,048 I can handle myself against you in any way at all. 302 00:15:30,471 --> 00:15:33,805 You are but a passing whim, and you'll never last. 303 00:15:33,891 --> 00:15:36,053 Oh, I have no problem lasting, old timer. 304 00:15:37,603 --> 00:15:38,719 No problem at all. 305 00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:40,637 DOOR SLAMS 306 00:15:40,731 --> 00:15:41,767 BOTH: We're closed! 307 00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:44,943 CHARLIE: Oh! 308 00:15:45,736 --> 00:15:50,151 What is that? - Charlie, welcome to Purgatory. 309 00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:51,782 WOMAN GROWLS 310 00:15:55,413 --> 00:15:57,029 DOC GROWLS 311 00:16:01,377 --> 00:16:02,377 CHARLIE SCREAMS 312 00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:03,772 What do I do? What do I do? What do I do? 313 00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:05,879 Let me loose, Charlie! Now! 314 00:16:12,346 --> 00:16:13,382 WOMAN HISSES 315 00:16:25,109 --> 00:16:27,269 We just got attacked by a woman with a barbecued skull. 316 00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:28,856 Then I punched her through the heart. 317 00:16:29,113 --> 00:16:31,105 As you do, if you are me. 318 00:16:32,283 --> 00:16:33,563 CHARLIE: What do we do with her? 319 00:16:37,079 --> 00:16:38,115 Salt. 320 00:16:39,624 --> 00:16:42,958 That like a vampire thing? - It is a witch thing. Call Wynonna. 321 00:16:43,044 --> 00:16:45,286 She didn't... Didn't want to be disturbed. - Call her. 322 00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:47,448 You're a lot like Wyatt, you know. 323 00:16:47,507 --> 00:16:48,372 PHONE RINGS 324 00:16:48,466 --> 00:16:51,630 Same eyes, full of mischief and foreboding. 325 00:16:51,886 --> 00:16:53,155 You're not going to talk me out of shooting you 326 00:16:53,179 --> 00:16:57,264 with fortune teller-y adjectives... Ad... verbs... Nouns. 327 00:16:58,976 --> 00:16:59,976 You gonna get that? 328 00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:03,355 They'll leave a message. 329 00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:06,731 I just didn't think you wanted to hear any more about me and Doc. 330 00:17:08,069 --> 00:17:09,401 Maybe it makes you uncomfortable. 331 00:17:09,487 --> 00:17:10,898 No, there's no me-and-Doc 332 00:17:10,988 --> 00:17:14,072 so you're welcome to as much you-and-Doc as you can handle 333 00:17:14,617 --> 00:17:16,609 cos I can... too... 334 00:17:18,496 --> 00:17:20,408 Handle it. - And yet you dropped everything, 335 00:17:21,082 --> 00:17:23,119 even your fine-ass date, to come over here. 336 00:17:28,422 --> 00:17:30,129 Um, yeah. To do my job. 337 00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:35,594 To turn Doc back into a regular asshole instead of a vampire asshole. 338 00:17:36,430 --> 00:17:38,763 You don't make Doc Holliday do anything, Wynonna 339 00:17:40,017 --> 00:17:41,053 He makes you. 340 00:17:46,357 --> 00:17:47,393 I love you. 341 00:17:51,153 --> 00:17:52,769 Smells like rain is coming. 342 00:17:57,577 --> 00:17:58,613 Henry... 343 00:17:59,537 --> 00:18:01,403 I bought a ticket for the coach next week... 344 00:18:02,290 --> 00:18:03,326 to New York. 345 00:18:04,917 --> 00:18:05,953 What is in New York? 346 00:18:07,795 --> 00:18:08,795 A ship. 347 00:18:12,300 --> 00:18:14,838 You're going home? Back to Hungary? 348 00:18:16,887 --> 00:18:17,923 Yes. 349 00:18:18,764 --> 00:18:19,800 What do you think? 350 00:18:23,978 --> 00:18:28,439 I came here to build a life, make my own way, and it's not working. 351 00:18:30,067 --> 00:18:31,649 Purgatory, Las Vegas, Kansas City... 352 00:18:31,902 --> 00:18:34,315 They're just places. We pass on through them and forget them. 353 00:18:34,739 --> 00:18:36,196 Well, we were pretty drunk. 354 00:18:38,909 --> 00:18:42,073 Well, I'm sure you won't be remembering me much longer. 355 00:18:48,210 --> 00:18:49,746 Are you playing games with me, girl? 356 00:18:50,796 --> 00:18:51,832 No. 357 00:18:53,424 --> 00:18:54,460 Smart. 358 00:18:55,551 --> 00:18:57,713 Because Doc Holliday never loses at games. 359 00:19:07,271 --> 00:19:08,682 COUGHS 360 00:19:09,106 --> 00:19:10,106 Doc? 361 00:19:11,233 --> 00:19:14,647 DOC COUGHS LOUDLY 362 00:19:20,451 --> 00:19:23,444 WYNONNA: This is some beautiful revisionist love story bullshit. 363 00:19:24,205 --> 00:19:25,885 Just get to the part where you abandon him. 364 00:19:25,956 --> 00:19:26,992 He had Wyatt. 365 00:19:27,083 --> 00:19:31,578 You left him alone, and he was sick and scared and dying. 366 00:19:32,380 --> 00:19:34,747 Now what could a fortune teller do? Cry over him? 367 00:19:36,008 --> 00:19:37,715 You palmed it. - He also taught me that. 368 00:19:51,190 --> 00:19:52,226 WYNONNA MUTTERS: Dammit. 369 00:19:52,650 --> 00:19:54,607 That is a bigger tiny sword. 370 00:19:55,403 --> 00:19:56,439 INDISTINCT POP MUSIC 371 00:19:57,446 --> 00:19:58,446 WAVERLY: So... 372 00:19:59,115 --> 00:20:00,356 Jeremy, huh? 373 00:20:00,783 --> 00:20:02,194 Quite the catch. 374 00:20:02,284 --> 00:20:04,596 You know, judging from your roster of high school boyfriends 375 00:20:04,620 --> 00:20:06,260 I'm not sure I can accept that compliment. 376 00:20:06,330 --> 00:20:10,119 Uh, says the guy who dated Chrissy Nedley for two semesters! 377 00:20:10,668 --> 00:20:11,687 I did. You know, that poor girl 378 00:20:11,711 --> 00:20:13,605 I made her watch Friday Night Lights like six times. 379 00:20:13,629 --> 00:20:15,211 What, for the football? - Oh sure. 380 00:20:19,093 --> 00:20:20,709 TENSE MUSIC 381 00:20:20,803 --> 00:20:23,170 What do you think a potato feels when it's in the ground? 382 00:20:24,765 --> 00:20:25,765 Uh... 383 00:20:26,392 --> 00:20:29,851 You know, I... I haven't really thought about it. 384 00:20:31,147 --> 00:20:32,934 I have been thinking about it. 385 00:20:35,025 --> 00:20:36,937 Seeds in the ground, whispering to one another. 386 00:20:38,821 --> 00:20:40,312 Bulshar can talk to them, you know. 387 00:20:41,824 --> 00:20:43,816 Wait, Robin, can you hear them? 388 00:20:45,244 --> 00:20:46,280 The trees? 389 00:20:47,079 --> 00:20:48,786 Do you know what he's telling them to do? 390 00:20:49,498 --> 00:20:52,241 You know, sometimes I want to lay down and let the forest have me. 391 00:20:58,174 --> 00:21:00,917 So, uh, he's out there, he's minding his own business, when... 392 00:21:01,010 --> 00:21:03,093 OK, OK. Just slow down. Take it easy, OK? 393 00:21:04,221 --> 00:21:06,324 Yeah, I would but now I'm freaking out at the giant ring 394 00:21:06,348 --> 00:21:07,634 sticking out of your biscuit. 395 00:21:08,267 --> 00:21:09,303 SHE GASPS 396 00:21:13,063 --> 00:21:14,099 Guys... 397 00:21:14,815 --> 00:21:15,976 Oh my God. 398 00:21:16,901 --> 00:21:18,062 Oh my God. This is happening! 399 00:21:18,152 --> 00:21:19,017 JEREMY: Yes! 400 00:21:19,111 --> 00:21:20,898 I feel dizzy. - Me too. 401 00:21:20,988 --> 00:21:23,071 Hey, I better be your bae of honour! - Course. 402 00:21:23,365 --> 00:21:24,365 This is Bulshar's ring. 403 00:21:25,201 --> 00:21:26,201 JEREMY: Oh. - Oh. 404 00:21:28,454 --> 00:21:29,490 I threw this away! 405 00:21:29,747 --> 00:21:31,516 JEREMY: Yeah, and I locked it away just today. 406 00:21:31,540 --> 00:21:32,540 You had it? 407 00:21:32,583 --> 00:21:34,950 Yeah. Well, Wynonna gave it to me. She got it from Doc. 408 00:21:35,169 --> 00:21:36,169 Stupid Doc! 409 00:21:36,212 --> 00:21:38,374 Guys, something's really, really wrong with Robin! 410 00:21:38,464 --> 00:21:40,817 Well, I mean, he... He probably just has meet the parents jitters. 411 00:21:40,841 --> 00:21:43,003 No, from the trees. - Bulshar's ring is following me. 412 00:21:43,427 --> 00:21:45,259 Yeah, and Doc's a vampire, and he bit Robin. 413 00:21:45,346 --> 00:21:46,462 WAVERLY AND NICOLE: What? 414 00:21:46,847 --> 00:21:48,407 Is that why Robin just licked a potato? 415 00:21:48,724 --> 00:21:50,886 Because, you guys, Robin just licked a potato! 416 00:21:51,060 --> 00:21:52,392 Potato? - Yeah. 417 00:21:52,478 --> 00:21:53,309 DOOR CLICKS SHUT 418 00:21:53,395 --> 00:21:55,978 Also? I think he just left, so... 419 00:21:59,693 --> 00:22:01,650 CHARLIE: She's got a good-sized trunk on her. 420 00:22:01,987 --> 00:22:02,987 Right? 421 00:22:03,906 --> 00:22:06,523 Who cares if she failed her emissions test. 422 00:22:17,253 --> 00:22:18,289 DOC GROANS 423 00:22:18,838 --> 00:22:21,797 Still smells like Bobo Del Shit down here. 424 00:22:22,091 --> 00:22:23,627 This where you hide all your bodies? 425 00:22:24,593 --> 00:22:27,802 This was my personal hell for over one hundred years... 426 00:22:28,514 --> 00:22:30,927 until the Earp heir came to retrieve Peacemaker. 427 00:22:32,643 --> 00:22:33,679 Wynonna rescued you? 428 00:22:35,646 --> 00:22:36,646 You know, unfortunately 429 00:22:36,689 --> 00:22:38,489 she doesn't seem to be available this evening. 430 00:22:38,691 --> 00:22:40,091 You might want to get used to that. 431 00:22:40,568 --> 00:22:42,355 CAR STARTS UP, ENGINE REVS 432 00:22:43,195 --> 00:22:44,311 CHARLIE: Oh! Oh! Oh! 433 00:22:44,655 --> 00:22:46,271 DOC: She put herself back together again! 434 00:22:46,490 --> 00:22:47,526 Shoot the tires! 435 00:22:47,741 --> 00:22:49,107 I'm not gonna shoot Charlene! 436 00:22:49,368 --> 00:22:50,404 No, but... 437 00:22:51,579 --> 00:22:52,615 DOC CHUCKLES 438 00:22:53,414 --> 00:22:58,000 Well, goddam. It seems only fair. I stole her car. Now she's stole mine. 439 00:22:59,461 --> 00:23:01,578 That was Constance who put me in the well 440 00:23:02,339 --> 00:23:04,672 and damn, if I didn't almost get to return the favour. 441 00:23:05,134 --> 00:23:06,528 I thought a witch threw you in the well? 442 00:23:06,552 --> 00:23:08,293 Constance Clootie is the Stone Witch 443 00:23:08,387 --> 00:23:11,095 resurrected by Bulshar, her husband, no doubt. 444 00:23:12,057 --> 00:23:13,093 I'm gonna need a chart. 445 00:23:13,642 --> 00:23:16,350 Oh, we're gonna need better shoes. 446 00:23:18,522 --> 00:23:19,962 NICOLE: Hey, Robin? - WAVERLY: Robin? 447 00:23:20,024 --> 00:23:22,437 JEREMY: Robin, it's freezing. You... You don't have a coat. 448 00:23:22,526 --> 00:23:24,726 NICOLE: Robin? - WAVERLY: Guys, let's check in the barn. 449 00:23:25,070 --> 00:23:26,311 Sweetie are you in here? 450 00:23:29,742 --> 00:23:30,778 JEREMY: Oh, his stuff. 451 00:23:31,785 --> 00:23:32,821 Robin? 452 00:23:35,122 --> 00:23:36,158 JEREMY: Where is he? 453 00:23:39,710 --> 00:23:40,746 ROBIN MUTTERS: Soon. 454 00:23:43,964 --> 00:23:45,330 It'll all be over soon. 455 00:23:48,385 --> 00:23:50,502 We need to keep fertilizing the soil. 456 00:23:54,892 --> 00:23:56,758 Tired? - No. 457 00:23:57,895 --> 00:23:59,431 You? - Psht. Nah. 458 00:24:00,648 --> 00:24:03,186 But how long do you figure this stand-off is gonna last? 459 00:24:03,567 --> 00:24:05,149 Why, you got monster truck tickets? 460 00:24:05,235 --> 00:24:06,817 So we just keep on keeping on? 461 00:24:08,447 --> 00:24:10,313 Unless something more interesting happens. 462 00:24:10,407 --> 00:24:11,443 DOOR CLICKS OPENS 463 00:24:13,118 --> 00:24:14,154 WOMAN GROWLS 464 00:24:16,121 --> 00:24:17,157 Hey. Huh. 465 00:24:22,294 --> 00:24:23,375 WOMAN GRUNTS 466 00:24:25,881 --> 00:24:26,917 What did he do to her? 467 00:24:34,890 --> 00:24:36,256 That was... - The Stone Witch. 468 00:24:40,062 --> 00:24:42,395 I hardly recognized her without her resting witch face. 469 00:24:42,481 --> 00:24:43,481 How'd you know? 470 00:24:44,066 --> 00:24:45,352 Power recognizes power. 471 00:24:45,985 --> 00:24:47,021 Even if it is fading. 472 00:24:48,612 --> 00:24:51,104 She's looking for... Doc? 473 00:24:51,740 --> 00:24:53,606 Someone. - Or something. 474 00:24:57,287 --> 00:24:58,598 DOC: I could go on ahead, if you want. 475 00:24:58,622 --> 00:25:00,308 CHARLIE: I can keep up. You see me keeping up, right? 476 00:25:00,332 --> 00:25:02,092 I have to pass a physical every three months. 477 00:25:02,376 --> 00:25:04,709 DOC: Oh, I'm much faster, if I choose to be. 478 00:25:04,795 --> 00:25:06,595 CHARLIE: You can barely stand. You need blood. 479 00:25:08,048 --> 00:25:10,335 I would refrain from mentioning that substance. 480 00:25:10,801 --> 00:25:12,212 I already lost control once today 481 00:25:12,302 --> 00:25:14,419 and the only reason I didn't tear out his throat 482 00:25:14,513 --> 00:25:16,254 was for the taste of moulding earth. 483 00:25:16,348 --> 00:25:17,348 CHARLIE: Take it easy. 484 00:25:18,308 --> 00:25:19,344 Huh? 485 00:25:19,852 --> 00:25:22,219 Whoa. Alright, alright. I got you. I got you. 486 00:25:23,856 --> 00:25:24,892 Take it easy! 487 00:25:25,566 --> 00:25:26,932 This is me taking it easy. 488 00:25:29,862 --> 00:25:31,899 Ah hell, just do it. 489 00:25:36,910 --> 00:25:38,492 Like a sack of old west potatoes. 490 00:25:39,955 --> 00:25:41,412 "How was your date night, Charlie?" 491 00:25:42,708 --> 00:25:43,744 It was a little tense. 492 00:25:46,253 --> 00:25:49,337 He's like a beautiful shirtless roomba. - We need to get him inside. 493 00:25:49,965 --> 00:25:51,172 Or get him talking. I... 494 00:25:52,134 --> 00:25:54,296 I think he might be tapping the bad guy's phone lines. 495 00:25:55,971 --> 00:25:57,428 What can you hear, Robin? 496 00:25:58,599 --> 00:26:01,262 They entombed him for decades... 497 00:26:02,686 --> 00:26:03,686 but he's close now. 498 00:26:05,105 --> 00:26:07,267 JEREMY: Bulshar? What's he close to? 499 00:26:12,988 --> 00:26:14,024 Hi. 500 00:26:15,449 --> 00:26:19,318 This is not the bathroom. - Uh, no, you're in the barn. 501 00:26:20,871 --> 00:26:22,988 OK, maybe don't step in this general area? 502 00:26:23,624 --> 00:26:26,617 WAVERLY: What are you doing out here? - I... I heard whispers. 503 00:26:27,252 --> 00:26:28,788 I think it's the tree roots? 504 00:26:29,463 --> 00:26:32,251 They don't want to but he's making them do his bidding, Bulshar. 505 00:26:33,717 --> 00:26:35,583 Shit, I know... I know this sounds crazy. 506 00:26:35,677 --> 00:26:39,296 Hey, I survived a massacre and I'm being haunted by a demon's ring. 507 00:26:39,723 --> 00:26:43,057 Yeah, I touched tentacle goo and made a lightning rod of spoons. 508 00:26:43,936 --> 00:26:45,643 I was in a car crash when I was a kid 509 00:26:46,063 --> 00:26:47,707 trapped with my mother's body for three days 510 00:26:47,731 --> 00:26:49,893 and now I can sense when my friends are super scared. 511 00:26:51,527 --> 00:26:52,563 You're not crazy. 512 00:26:53,153 --> 00:26:54,953 Also not the first person to pee in this barn. 513 00:26:55,364 --> 00:26:56,229 We have a bathroom. 514 00:26:56,323 --> 00:26:58,406 Yeah, what is it with dudes, seriously? 515 00:26:59,118 --> 00:27:00,450 JEREMY: You have my affection. 516 00:27:01,787 --> 00:27:03,267 Now, how about giving me your potato? 517 00:27:03,956 --> 00:27:04,956 With pleasure. 518 00:27:08,627 --> 00:27:11,547 The rest of you seeing that lady with the flame-broiled noggin over there? 519 00:27:12,631 --> 00:27:13,667 WOMAN GROWLS 520 00:27:13,841 --> 00:27:15,127 WAVERLY: Constance Clootie! 521 00:27:15,843 --> 00:27:18,381 Woman, can't I have one goddamn dinner party 522 00:27:18,470 --> 00:27:20,803 without you getting all up in my biscuits? 523 00:27:22,724 --> 00:27:23,724 WAVERLY CRIES OUT 524 00:27:26,603 --> 00:27:27,468 NICOLE SCREAMS 525 00:27:27,563 --> 00:27:29,179 WAVERLY: Oh my God. Are you...? 526 00:27:29,815 --> 00:27:30,935 Are you OK? - NICOLE: I'm OK. 527 00:27:31,859 --> 00:27:33,942 She belongs to Bulshar too. - Woah. Hey, hey. 528 00:27:34,027 --> 00:27:36,394 I just found a man I like. I'm not losing him to some woman. 529 00:27:36,697 --> 00:27:37,983 Especially one with grill marks! 530 00:27:38,490 --> 00:27:39,526 SHE GRUNTS ANGRILY 531 00:27:44,496 --> 00:27:46,237 Argh! Hot. Hot! 532 00:27:46,707 --> 00:27:48,369 Argh. Hot, hot, hot! 533 00:27:50,002 --> 00:27:51,038 Waverly, don't touch it! 534 00:27:54,965 --> 00:27:56,001 It... It fits me. 535 00:27:56,216 --> 00:27:57,252 WOMAN SNARLS 536 00:27:58,886 --> 00:28:00,468 What are you doing!? No, no, no! 537 00:28:01,513 --> 00:28:02,549 WOMAN SCREAMS 538 00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:04,676 JEREMY: Ooh. 539 00:28:10,480 --> 00:28:12,517 What? Since when did you get a finishing move? 540 00:28:16,987 --> 00:28:18,728 Was that whole thing normal for you guys? 541 00:28:19,698 --> 00:28:21,155 Honestly, yeah, Kind of. 542 00:28:22,242 --> 00:28:24,029 Yeah. Let's go get some wine. 543 00:28:25,037 --> 00:28:26,573 Three for me. - OK. 544 00:28:29,082 --> 00:28:30,082 Thank you. 545 00:28:34,254 --> 00:28:36,997 Zombie Skullhead Constance was going through Doc's stuff. 546 00:28:37,090 --> 00:28:38,090 His cigar box? 547 00:28:38,467 --> 00:28:41,050 Yeah, as far as we could tell, she only took three cards 548 00:28:42,137 --> 00:28:43,344 red border, vintage. 549 00:28:44,264 --> 00:28:46,847 Tarot cards, Kate's, from when they first met. 550 00:28:48,060 --> 00:28:49,900 KATE: Henry palmed the cards after the reading. 551 00:28:50,229 --> 00:28:51,989 He always swore he didn't, but I knew he did. 552 00:28:52,064 --> 00:28:53,680 Whose cards were they? You never said. 553 00:28:55,817 --> 00:28:57,604 Well, at that point, he was just a Sheriff. 554 00:29:02,324 --> 00:29:03,656 MAN: I am the Sheriff Clootie 555 00:29:05,077 --> 00:29:07,865 and I am looking for something... in the Ghost River Triangle. 556 00:29:09,414 --> 00:29:11,656 They say that place is cursed. - I'm close... 557 00:29:13,543 --> 00:29:14,954 but one piece eludes me. 558 00:29:15,837 --> 00:29:19,456 Powerful though I am, I cannot find it on my own. 559 00:29:19,549 --> 00:29:21,415 So you will do it. 560 00:29:40,696 --> 00:29:42,312 KATE: This card represents the past. 561 00:29:45,993 --> 00:29:47,029 This, the present. 562 00:29:51,623 --> 00:29:52,623 The... 563 00:29:54,418 --> 00:29:56,000 I can't read your future. - Finish it. 564 00:29:56,169 --> 00:29:57,410 No, I mean, I won't. 565 00:29:59,423 --> 00:30:00,423 Do it. 566 00:30:00,674 --> 00:30:01,710 DOC: The lady... 567 00:30:03,593 --> 00:30:06,631 ...said no. - This is no business of yours. 568 00:30:08,098 --> 00:30:09,760 KATE: I have this aimed at your business. 569 00:30:10,225 --> 00:30:11,261 Take your money and go! 570 00:30:12,602 --> 00:30:14,764 DOC: But leave the cards. 571 00:30:28,994 --> 00:30:32,453 You read Sheriff Clootie... Bulshar's cards? 572 00:30:33,123 --> 00:30:35,581 Not all of them. He wants to find his last one 573 00:30:36,293 --> 00:30:37,329 his future. 574 00:30:38,670 --> 00:30:40,332 Or is it now his present? 575 00:30:41,882 --> 00:30:45,341 Then we better intercept the bitch kebab and make sure she doesn't give it to him. 576 00:30:51,266 --> 00:30:53,223 Don't underestimate the power of this relic. 577 00:30:53,560 --> 00:30:55,142 It's older than most things on earth. 578 00:31:03,987 --> 00:31:05,148 Oh fudge-nuggets. 579 00:31:06,615 --> 00:31:08,197 It couldn't have been a princess cut? 580 00:31:23,215 --> 00:31:24,251 WOMAN GROWLS SOFTLY 581 00:31:29,721 --> 00:31:30,757 BULSHAR: Past. 582 00:31:35,852 --> 00:31:36,888 Present. 583 00:31:41,650 --> 00:31:42,686 Glorious future. 584 00:31:47,906 --> 00:31:51,775 BULSHAR LAUGHS WILDLY 585 00:32:04,297 --> 00:32:05,297 WYNONNA: Constance. 586 00:32:07,634 --> 00:32:08,670 It's OK. 587 00:32:10,720 --> 00:32:11,720 KATE: We're too late. 588 00:32:12,264 --> 00:32:13,800 God, she can't even speak. 589 00:32:15,225 --> 00:32:18,059 KATE: What has Bulshar done to you? - Made her pathetic. 590 00:32:20,730 --> 00:32:24,223 Listen you've been a thorn in my side for way too long, Stone Witch 591 00:32:25,735 --> 00:32:27,943 but nobody deserves to be somebody's meat puppet. 592 00:32:29,573 --> 00:32:30,573 Help us find him. 593 00:32:32,868 --> 00:32:34,780 KATE: She has nothing left to give, Wynonna. 594 00:32:35,370 --> 00:32:36,577 She's as cursed as you are. 595 00:32:39,624 --> 00:32:40,660 Sucks, right? 596 00:32:42,544 --> 00:32:43,705 So does this. 597 00:32:46,173 --> 00:32:49,086 WOMAN GROWLS SOFTLY 598 00:32:49,342 --> 00:32:50,583 KATE: It's no small thing... 599 00:32:51,344 --> 00:32:52,801 to be able to choose your own end. 600 00:33:01,229 --> 00:33:02,515 GUNSHOT RINGS OUT 601 00:33:10,447 --> 00:33:12,814 DOC: What is this? - I've got a buddy who's a paramedic. 602 00:33:13,783 --> 00:33:15,740 We didn't know your blood type, so we went a... 603 00:33:17,162 --> 00:33:19,404 nice neutral O negative. 604 00:33:21,541 --> 00:33:22,577 DOC: Thank you. 605 00:33:23,418 --> 00:33:25,501 CHARLIE: Those canines aren't made for nachos. 606 00:33:28,423 --> 00:33:32,007 Perhaps this way I can avoid run-ins with friends of friends. 607 00:33:44,689 --> 00:33:45,725 I like her, Doc. 608 00:33:47,150 --> 00:33:48,561 DOC: I'm thirsty not stupid. 609 00:33:50,862 --> 00:33:52,569 You don't know her like I do. 610 00:33:58,078 --> 00:34:01,287 You will never know her like I do. 611 00:34:01,748 --> 00:34:03,410 I know she hunts what you've become. 612 00:34:13,385 --> 00:34:14,876 Well, she will come to understand. 613 00:34:16,930 --> 00:34:18,637 WYNONNA: You can't remember his cards? 614 00:34:19,182 --> 00:34:21,182 KATE: You know how many reads I've done since then? 615 00:34:21,851 --> 00:34:23,342 It was a bad one I chose to forget. 616 00:34:23,436 --> 00:34:24,472 WYNONNA SIGHS 617 00:34:25,063 --> 00:34:28,397 WYNONNA: Bullshit's always one step ahead. - Yeah, well, he's still just a demon. 618 00:34:29,484 --> 00:34:30,645 While you, Wynonna Earp 619 00:34:30,735 --> 00:34:32,672 are the best demon hunter I've seen in a long time. 620 00:34:32,696 --> 00:34:33,812 Certainly the prettiest. 621 00:34:34,781 --> 00:34:36,741 You're trying to make me forget about killing you. 622 00:34:38,660 --> 00:34:40,697 You know, my death won't return Doc to mortality. 623 00:34:41,580 --> 00:34:42,580 It's a myth. 624 00:34:43,915 --> 00:34:45,355 Well, you should have led with that. 625 00:34:49,004 --> 00:34:51,712 It'd be awesome if Bulshar's cards just said 626 00:34:51,798 --> 00:34:54,916 "Hey Bulshar, you're a big old bag of deflated dicks". 627 00:34:56,761 --> 00:34:59,094 Yeah, I... I haven't seen that card. - What? 628 00:34:59,764 --> 00:35:02,552 There's no 'ye big olde sack of airless dingadongies' card? 629 00:35:03,018 --> 00:35:05,852 OK. You mock, but the Tarot has a lot to say 630 00:35:05,937 --> 00:35:07,553 to those with the will to listen. 631 00:35:10,775 --> 00:35:15,566 And my will is a stone-cold, bemulleted iron woman... 632 00:35:16,740 --> 00:35:17,740 on steroids. 633 00:35:19,159 --> 00:35:23,028 Girl, I'm a mystic, and I still can't decode that sentence. 634 00:35:23,705 --> 00:35:24,741 As an Earp, I'm linked... 635 00:35:25,540 --> 00:35:26,576 to Bulshar 636 00:35:26,875 --> 00:35:29,458 Call it fate or whatever, but we're all linked by this curse 637 00:35:29,544 --> 00:35:33,663 so maybe we share a future too. 638 00:35:34,841 --> 00:35:37,161 So I read your cards to know his. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 639 00:35:38,303 --> 00:35:39,339 KATE: You're certain? 640 00:35:40,138 --> 00:35:41,574 They may tell you something you don't wish to know. 641 00:35:41,598 --> 00:35:44,386 Lady, I'm made of things I don't wish to know. 642 00:35:46,645 --> 00:35:48,261 NICOLE GRUNTS 643 00:35:48,647 --> 00:35:50,855 NICOLE: Why did you put it on? - I was meant to. 644 00:35:51,858 --> 00:35:52,894 What does that mean? 645 00:35:54,110 --> 00:35:56,227 I don't know, but don't you think it's weird 646 00:35:56,321 --> 00:35:57,812 that I can't get it off either? 647 00:35:58,239 --> 00:35:59,650 Whoa. Wait, wait, wait! 648 00:35:59,741 --> 00:36:01,698 Ow! Ow, ow! Jeremy, my finger's still attached! 649 00:36:01,785 --> 00:36:03,777 Sorry, sorry, but what's that? 650 00:36:04,496 --> 00:36:06,909 Maybe... Hebrew or Aramaic? 651 00:36:07,248 --> 00:36:08,364 That wasn't there before. 652 00:36:09,334 --> 00:36:10,334 What? 653 00:36:10,919 --> 00:36:13,127 OK, wait. Your... Your finger made this word appear? 654 00:36:15,632 --> 00:36:18,045 Dictionaries. We need dictionaries people. 655 00:36:18,218 --> 00:36:20,488 WYNONNA: I know why Bulshar is in the Ghost River Triangle. 656 00:36:20,512 --> 00:36:21,878 Perfect Nose Kate read my cards. 657 00:36:22,806 --> 00:36:24,798 I'm apparently Tarot twins with Bulshar. 658 00:36:25,684 --> 00:36:27,346 We think these are the cards he wanted. 659 00:36:28,603 --> 00:36:29,603 First, the past. 660 00:36:30,563 --> 00:36:31,929 The devil, because yeah 661 00:36:32,023 --> 00:36:34,936 our family's taken a whole metric shit-tonne from that demon-bag. 662 00:36:35,402 --> 00:36:37,314 The next card represents the present. 663 00:36:38,071 --> 00:36:40,529 Bulshar wants the tower. 664 00:36:40,824 --> 00:36:42,486 Well, that's obviously a Wang metaphor. 665 00:36:42,575 --> 00:36:44,988 Kate says that represents darkness and destruction. 666 00:36:45,078 --> 00:36:46,694 Yeah, like I said, Bulshar's wang. 667 00:36:47,706 --> 00:36:50,540 But if he gets it, his future is gonna be... 668 00:36:54,129 --> 00:36:56,997 Make out city? Um, is this about Bulshar's wang? 669 00:36:57,799 --> 00:37:00,712 It's the first two lovers who ever... 670 00:37:05,223 --> 00:37:06,634 The first first lovers, guys. 671 00:37:06,725 --> 00:37:10,059 The first two to grab some birds and rub 'em on their bees. 672 00:37:10,687 --> 00:37:12,474 Season one, episode one of Boneland. 673 00:37:12,564 --> 00:37:16,433 So the couple normally referred to as Adam and Eve. 674 00:37:16,985 --> 00:37:18,351 OK, so, the devil... 675 00:37:19,529 --> 00:37:20,529 the tower... 676 00:37:21,781 --> 00:37:22,988 Adam and Eve. - Paradise! 677 00:37:24,617 --> 00:37:25,653 Jeremy! 678 00:37:25,952 --> 00:37:27,363 You dunked on my mic drop, man. 679 00:37:27,787 --> 00:37:31,952 No, it's Arabic, on the ring. It means Garden of Paradise. 680 00:37:32,125 --> 00:37:33,832 WAVERLY: What? - That's what he's after. 681 00:37:34,544 --> 00:37:36,581 OK, so I had negligent hippie parents 682 00:37:36,671 --> 00:37:39,414 and I smoked cigarettes behind church instead of ever going in 683 00:37:39,507 --> 00:37:43,171 but is paradise supposed to be in North America? 684 00:37:43,595 --> 00:37:45,587 In the fudging Ghost River Triangle no less? 685 00:37:46,306 --> 00:37:48,514 Juan Carlo said this was sanctuary, right? 686 00:37:49,726 --> 00:37:50,762 That's why. 687 00:37:51,686 --> 00:37:53,803 He's looking for the Garden. - ROBIN: No. 688 00:37:55,106 --> 00:37:56,666 He's not looking for the Garden of Eden. 689 00:37:58,067 --> 00:37:59,067 He already found it. 690 00:38:02,071 --> 00:38:03,482 DOOR OPENS 691 00:38:07,452 --> 00:38:08,772 WYNONNA: I'd invite you in but... 692 00:38:09,496 --> 00:38:11,096 But I'm a vampire, and you're not ready? 693 00:38:11,539 --> 00:38:13,326 Ding, ding, ding. Smart girl. 694 00:38:14,959 --> 00:38:16,951 Charlie said he'll call you later. 695 00:38:20,381 --> 00:38:22,861 We were all just trying to have a nice dinner for once, y'know? 696 00:38:23,176 --> 00:38:24,792 Yeah, well, someone had a good time. 697 00:38:31,017 --> 00:38:32,849 Kinda wish he hadn't signed it "Buttercup". 698 00:38:32,977 --> 00:38:35,377 KATE: There's something to be said about the sentimental man. 699 00:38:36,231 --> 00:38:38,689 Or one who tells you that he's feeling something... 700 00:38:39,901 --> 00:38:41,608 Anything. - You gave up on Doc. 701 00:38:42,028 --> 00:38:44,270 I hoped he'd chase me, for once. 702 00:38:45,865 --> 00:38:48,073 Instead, I left him thinking he had nothing left. 703 00:38:48,701 --> 00:38:49,566 Nothing to lose. 704 00:38:49,661 --> 00:38:51,243 So he went and made a deal with a witch? 705 00:38:52,664 --> 00:38:54,326 One last attempt to escape the disease. 706 00:38:54,707 --> 00:38:55,993 She threw him down in a well. 707 00:38:58,086 --> 00:38:59,952 He was alone. - KATE: But I came back. 708 00:39:00,755 --> 00:39:03,042 Don't you see, Wynonna? I was playing a game. 709 00:39:05,593 --> 00:39:06,629 But this time, I lost. 710 00:39:08,012 --> 00:39:09,932 KATE: Where is John Henry Holliday, Mrs. Clootie? 711 00:39:10,390 --> 00:39:11,390 Where is my husband? 712 00:39:11,975 --> 00:39:13,091 Husband? 713 00:39:13,268 --> 00:39:16,432 Oh, come now, wasn't he still paying you? - Tell me what you've done! 714 00:39:21,067 --> 00:39:23,775 Do you feel pain? Do you feel loss? 715 00:39:24,988 --> 00:39:25,988 Good. 716 00:39:26,781 --> 00:39:28,488 It's a balm to my own wounds. 717 00:39:30,285 --> 00:39:31,321 I am a mother 718 00:39:31,870 --> 00:39:34,578 a mother whose children were slain for no reason. 719 00:39:35,957 --> 00:39:36,993 That is pain. 720 00:39:37,667 --> 00:39:39,283 That is loss. 721 00:39:44,465 --> 00:39:45,797 Doc had nothing to do with that. 722 00:39:46,718 --> 00:39:48,358 No, but his best friend, Wyatt Earp, did. 723 00:39:48,511 --> 00:39:49,718 Doc is innocent. 724 00:39:50,930 --> 00:39:52,050 Even you don't believe that. 725 00:39:53,558 --> 00:39:56,050 I feel it. I know he's still alive. 726 00:39:56,311 --> 00:39:58,394 And will be always, as per our deal. 727 00:39:59,188 --> 00:40:02,101 But you could search for centuries and never come close to finding him. 728 00:40:05,111 --> 00:40:07,103 I'm gonna try. - How? 729 00:40:07,655 --> 00:40:09,066 I'm fresh out of immortality. 730 00:40:10,408 --> 00:40:11,819 I don't need you for that, bitch. 731 00:40:13,745 --> 00:40:16,829 Or you could leave him behind, like he left you. 732 00:40:18,207 --> 00:40:20,324 Consider it my consolation gift. 733 00:40:21,085 --> 00:40:22,121 Your independence. 734 00:40:27,050 --> 00:40:28,632 Turns out, independence didn't take. 735 00:40:29,135 --> 00:40:30,855 That's when you went to see your Uncle Otto. 736 00:40:32,639 --> 00:40:33,846 Claimed my immortal kiss. 737 00:40:34,557 --> 00:40:36,014 So I could search for him forever. 738 00:40:38,061 --> 00:40:40,178 But it was you who found him, freed him. 739 00:40:41,814 --> 00:40:43,726 It was an accident. - KATE: Yeah, well... 740 00:40:44,692 --> 00:40:46,228 the universe loves a bad joke. 741 00:40:52,450 --> 00:40:54,157 You became a vampire for Doc? 742 00:40:56,454 --> 00:40:57,865 And he became one for you. 743 00:41:01,125 --> 00:41:02,161 Goodbye, Wynonna. 744 00:41:02,543 --> 00:41:05,627 WYNONNA: Where are you going? - To see if I can find a stagecoach. 745 00:41:24,357 --> 00:41:25,848 DOC: Wynonna. - Jesus! 746 00:41:26,818 --> 00:41:28,400 You just about gave me a heart attack. 747 00:41:28,528 --> 00:41:30,690 Well, I was uninvited from the house, remember? 748 00:41:32,365 --> 00:41:35,608 So now I skulk in the barn like the dog you think I am. 749 00:41:36,911 --> 00:41:39,824 Just because you can hide in the shadows, doesn't mean you should. 750 00:41:46,587 --> 00:41:48,169 I am done hiding from you. 751 00:41:52,593 --> 00:41:53,754 I don't like you like this. 752 00:41:55,805 --> 00:41:57,091 I have became this... 753 00:41:58,433 --> 00:42:02,143 because I am determined to be here as long as you require 754 00:42:02,937 --> 00:42:03,802 and if you should fall 755 00:42:03,896 --> 00:42:06,263 to fight for Alice and beyond, if necessary. 756 00:42:08,151 --> 00:42:09,232 You think I can't do this? 757 00:42:10,611 --> 00:42:12,193 I think we need to do this together. 758 00:42:16,409 --> 00:42:17,445 Good. 759 00:42:19,537 --> 00:42:22,280 The curse ends now. With both of us. 760 00:42:23,499 --> 00:42:24,535 It has to. 761 00:42:27,378 --> 00:42:28,938 Bulshar is here for the Garden of Eden. 762 00:42:30,298 --> 00:42:32,540 That's what the Ghost River Triangle is protecting. 763 00:42:33,384 --> 00:42:34,384 Dear God. 764 00:42:35,762 --> 00:42:38,129 BULSHAR: God has nothing to do with it. 56602

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