Original subtitles

Cecil!

Cecil! Cecil!

Cecil!

Cecil, my sheep!

My lady, have you lost your sheep?

Sir Jack, you’ve come at the right time.

I’ve lost my sheep Cecil.

Well that is my job,

I find the sheep to bring back to the people.

Tea, my lady? - Yes, please.

Thank you.

Good Lord, obey.

Pardon me?

Pardon me for my blue-bees.

Oh no, my blue-bee was showing.

In the twenties, they would like paint their knees.

What? Yeah.

Like face paint but for your knees

’cause they’re like so perfectly,.

Can I have some please? - Yeah, of course.

Thank you.

Mm, raspberry is my favourite.

Really? - Yeah.

I like the watermelon. - Really?

Personally, yeah.

I release everything that is no longer serving you

into the universe of love.

Oh no, got it on me.

Mmmm.

Yeah, it looks good.

I’m sorry, that went so in your eye.

And in my nose.

Here, I’m sorry.

I’ll do the same for me, I’m sorry.

I meant to not do it so near you.

You doofus! Lea!

Oh my god, I’m sorry.

I’m blind!

So I gesture back.

Yes, gesture back to the people.

I’m talking to every individual person.

Yes, I love that.

I’m just like "Hello! Hello, Ms. Banks."

Yes, I love that, I love that.

And then when you fall, you’re gonna do like a big,

yes, yes, yes, yes.

Oh no.

Oh my god.

So I’m like "But oh, is that him?"

Yeah, that’s, that’s, that’s my vision.

You’ve nailed it.

Do you do prayers at dinner?

- No. - Oh.

Um...

Pictures of Jesus around the house?

No. No, nothing like that.

But we did go to church every Sunday.

Ugh. Yeah.

We’d sit in Sunday school and sing songs about

how we’re all loved and how not to be afraid, you know?

That kind of hokey stuff.

So you didn’t go to church?

No.

What? Mmmhmm.

That’s wild.

Well when I turned 13,

I already didn’t feel all that comfortable in church

and, uh, that year I ended up giving a blowjob

to this guy from Hamilton.

Oh no. I know.

At the time, I was really excited but...

I don’t know, then I got home and

just felt so gross.

Like I felt dirty.

I kept trying to wash my hands

’cause I felt like I did something really wrong.

And I just couldn’t go back to church after that.

Like I didn’t belong there anymore.

I mean, Jesus loved whores.

Oh, fuck you!

Okay, so I stopped going to church,

and then I stopped caring about it.

Like...like I don’t give a fuck about church.

I’m not religious,

I don’t believe in any of that stuff.

But I miss that feeling of warmth, you know?

Like it was a real comfort being there as a kid,

and I’m scared all the time as an adult.

I’m scared and nothing can calm me down.

Like I’ll be going to bed whimpering

because I’m so scared.

That sounds really hard.

Then Kevin came along

and when he crawls into bed next to me,

and wraps his arms around me and presses against me,

and he’s all hard,

gosh, it’s like that same feeling again.

The feeling of being safe, of being loved.

It’s comfort.

The comfort of a man.

Oh.

Sorry.

- Does it hurt? - A little bit, yeah.

Okay.

I don’t know what’s going on over there.

I keep on going back and forth about the set.

I mean, we don’t have a huge budget

but, I don’t know,

part of me wants to build something really exciting,

you know?

Go all out.

On the other hand, maybe simpler is better.

Let your performances carry the story.

I don’t know, what do you think?

I don’t know,

I’m happy with anything.

I want it to look nice.

Professional.

Noah’s coming up to take pictures.

Noah! Yeah.

And he’s bringing the wig.

Yes, he’s bringing the wig.

He’s not even charging anything to take photos.

- What?! - He’s such a good guy.

That’s okay? - Mmmhmm.

- Okay. - Thanks.

Are you talking like horror movie scared

or real life scared?

Anything.

I guess...

I’m afraid of

not having enough money to pay rent.

Like, rent is due and I just don’t have enough money

and then the landlord kicks me out and I have nowhere to go.

You?

I’m scared of the security guards at the hospital.

One time when I was really sick,

I was running around and tried to leave,

like I wanted to go home,

and one of the security guards

just body checked me against the wall.

It was really painful and scary.

I’m sorry, Lea.

Poor!

Pretty sure only dogs can hear you.

♪ I have come with the water to boil ♪

♪ The water ♪

♪ The water ♪

♪ To boil ♪

♪ To boil ♪

♪ Boiling the water ♪

♪ The water ♪

It’s on.

Great.

Great, boss. Okay.

Hi, hi, hi!

Mmmm.

- Hey, you. - Hey, you.

You’re here. - I’m here.

I can’t believe you’re here.

Good to see you again, baby.

Gabby! Hey!

So nice to meet you in the flesh.

Nice to meet you too.

Yeah. Excited?

Yeah!

Got all those lines learned?

Only if you do.

Hmm.

This is a nice place, Lea.

How long your parents been on this lake for?

Oh, they bought in ’87, I think?

Or ’88, I can’t remember.

So nice.

The air, it’s so fresh!

Yeah, it sure beats my basement apartment.

Yeah, Lea says you’re out there in the West End near Kipling?

Ah, it’s a, it’s a bit further west than that.

Oh, like Mississauga?

All the way out there?

You like your place?

Um, yeah, it’s, it’s okay, it’s just a bit small.

Here, I can grab one of those.

No, no, it’s all right, I’ve got it.

Okay.

Did you bring it?

Did I bring what?

Of course I brought it.

You wanna unpack everything before I show you?

Yes, come on!

All right.

If there’s one thing uniting

Canada’s crop of emerging theatre makers,

it would be a common interest in distancing themselves

as far as possible from the classical canon.

But not every theatre artist

is approaching their storytelling in this way.

For Lea Houston’s new take on "Rapunzel",

which opens next month in the Distillery District,

the audience will be met with a very traditional take

on the old Grimm fairytale.

Her story is set during a massive plague

that has taken over a small town.

A bipolar woman, who is stuck in her third floor apartment,

has been growing out her hair.

Her ability to survive depends upon a kindly knee surgeon,

Dr. Ezra Eliot,

who has been dropping off supplies

at the bottom of her staircase every week.

When Rapunzel finally agrees

to let Dr. Eliot up to her apartment,

Houston treats this scene with a kind of magic and romance

that is hard to spot

in a world full of jaded Millennial productions.

Houston stands her ground

as one of our country’s promising voices.

Oh my god.

Lea! "One of our country’s promising voices?"

Yeah, wow.

Uh, thank you so much for picking that up!

To celebrate...

No way, you are too cute.

Thank you.

Wow, sorry, I’m gonna need a second. I’m...

God, I’m so excited.

I should have bought ten copies!

Really, baby, and I’m so excited for the show.

You’re gonna do so great.

You both are.

But how many people did you invite?

Just a few, right?

Oh no, she invited the whole lake.

The whole lake?!

Okay, wait.

Do you see that cottage over there just beyond the trees?

Yeah.

That’s Holly Banks’ cottage.

She’s the Artistic Director of Stratford Festival.

Yeah, I’m trying to see if she wants to come to the show.

You sneaky devil!

You don’t care about the other cottagers,

you just want the rich, influential-

Hey, hey, hey,

there’s nothing wrong with being a little strategic.

She’s very well connected,

loaded and she likes to invest in up and coming talent.

So I’m hoping she’ll see it and just be like...

wildly impressed and, I don’t know.

Oh, she’ll love it.

We’ll make her love it.

Yeah.

And, uh, what about you, Gabby?

Ready to go a little psycho?!

Okay, sorry, I’ll get some-

Flutes? Yes! On it.

Get some flutes.

Let’s celebrate.

Yeah.

Ahhh! Stop it!

Okay, no more, no more, no more.

No, stop it!

Hey! Stop it, it’s not funny!

Hey!

No, don’t.

Hey, stop it!

Stop! Ah!

Whoa!

Hey, stop it!

Bring it on, bring it on. Come on!

Yeah!

Hey, why isn’t she coming in?

’Cause she doesn’t like swimming.

I hope she doesn’t feel left out.

Oh no, she’s good.

We shouldn’t leave her out.

Stop it, Kevin.

Hey, Gabby?

Watch out, Gabby.

Kevin, no!

Come on, Gabby.

- No, no, no, no, no! - I’ve got ya, Gabby.

No, don’t! Gabby! Kevin!

Kevin, no! Kevin, no! - I’ve got ya, Gabby.

- Kevin, no! - I got ya.

- Nooooo! - Got you a little wet!

Gabby! Gabby!

Gabby! Gabby!

Gabby, I’ve got you! I’ve got you!

Gabby, I’ve got you!

Gabby!

Fuck.

What just happened?

She doesn’t like swimming.

Who doesn’t like swimming?

Someone tried to drown her.

It was really serious,

they had to give her mouth to mouth.

It really fucked her up.

I think she’s okay now but yeah,

clearly she doesn’t like swimming.

Oh, fuck. I’m sorry.

I didn’t know. I didn’t know!

- It’s okay. - I didn’t know.

I should have told you.

It’s fine.

Hey.

Hey.

I’m okay.

He didn’t know.

I should have told him.

It’s okay. He was just trying to have fun.

You okay though?

Yeah, I’m okay.

I’m gonna get you.

Hi, hi, hi.

Will you be my friend?

Ooh.

Goodbye.

Guess I’m...

alone again.

Wow.

Oh babe, the neighbours have the cutest dog.

Oh, I have to show you him.

He’s so sweet!

Oh yeah? Yeah.

He’s a little poodle.

What’s his name?

WeeWee.

That’s a good name.

Right? That’s a good name.

It is a good name.

Oh, he’s so sweet.

I’ve always wanted a dog.

I was never allowed one growing up.

There it is. I know, babe.

I know. You’ve told me this before.

Oh, have I? Yes.

Oh wait, have you?

Like, do you want a dog?

Ever? Maybe?

I want to travel.

I want to be able to leave at the drop of a hat.

Ugh, that’s fair, that’s fair.

You can’t do that with a dog.

Yeah, but dogs are so cute!

I’ve got you to cuddle me.

That’s fair, that’s fair.

So I’d say she was maybe 70,

maybe 65.

But she’s one of these older ladies

who still insists on wearing all the thick makeup, you know?

The blue eyeshadow, the blush, the lipstick, just...

So she’s renovating her bathroom

but she keeps on getting into all these fights

with the, the contractor

because he’s smoking weed on his lunch break,

so they’re not talking that much.

Now one day, the contractor leaves for the evening

and she goes into the bathroom in the middle of the night,

she told me she was sleepwalking,

and she just falls through the floor!

Lands in the kitchen, broke a bunch of bones.

So whose fault was it?

Well in the end she got a bit of money,

but it all boils down to these minute details,

like the contractor just didn’t warn her properly.

But you meet all these dumbasses.

Ugh, and that is just their problem.

They’re dumb and they do dumb shit,

and then they want money for all the dumb shit that they do,

and honestly, it got pretty disheartening to see just

how many dumb, greedy people there are in the world.

Oh, which is why you left.

Yeah.

One day I looked at myself in the mirror and I thought,

it’ll be an absolute shame

to let this handsome and chiselled face go to waste.

Yeah.

I don’t belong in the courtroom performing in front of judges.

I belong in the theatre

performing in front of audiences.

Well, it’s lucky that Lea found you then.

Where’d you find this one, Lea?

On the internet.

Yeah, I landed the fucking jackpot.

Ah!

So, uh, so Gabby,

I can’t say I really know very much about you.

You’re an actor, I get that.

And a painter.

I mean, I’m not really-

You’re a painter!

Say it, you’re a painter, you paint things!

I am a barista and I make coffee.

You’re an actor and a painter

and do barista stuff on the side!

A painter, eh?

My dad was a curator at the Vancouver Art Gallery.

Really? - Yeah.

Can’t say I know too much about art but...

I like to look at images.

I noticed there’s quite a few books kicking around here.

Yeah, this is a nice little collection.

You like Degas?

Um, it’s a bit of a cliche to like Degas.

How can you call him a cliche?

He’s a genius.

Just look at his paintings of the young ballerinas.

Here, wait a sec.

"The Ballet Class."

"The Ballerinas."

"The Green Dancer."

"Dancers in Blue."

These depictions of innocence!

Of young women on the cusp of adulthood!

I mean, that’s what I’m seeing.

They haven’t yet been disappointed by life,

their lives unburdened by unfortunate complications!

Truly, they’re pure,

virtuous,

untouched,

perfection!

Thanks, babe. Thank you.

Yeah, he’s gotta be one of my favourites.

You know they were all young prostitutes, right?

Were they? - Yeah.

The backrooms of the Paris Opera House

were kind of built to be like gentlemen’s clubs.

Well, I’m gonna pretend I didn’t hear that.

You wanna be able to look at an image like this

and believe in the fantasy.

Well, that’s kind of a-

that’s a fucked up way of looking at all this!

These young girls were exploited.

Okay. I’ll put away the Degas book.

Do you like Monet?

Again, bit of a cliche but he’s all right, I guess.

It’s ridiculous you don’t have running water though.

The plumber takes a vacation.

You know, I could just have a look at that pump tomorrow.

If you’ve got some tools kicking around,

maybe a screwdriver,

then I will be able to manage.

Lea?

Screwdriver?

Toolbox?

Yeah, I’ve got it.

We will figure it out tomorrow.

Yeah, sounds good.

Shouldn’t take more than a couple of hours.

Let me know if you want me to do anything else.

You know, I could chop more wood,

I could, uh, clean out the eavestroughs,

anything you need.

Yeah, whatever you want.

It’s so nice to be up here,

and it’s gonna be a beautiful show, baby.

And Gabby, what an interesting person!

You know, she told me she wrote a whole paper on Frida Kahlo!

- Yes. - Yeah.

Bit of a cliche in the canon but,

you can tell she’s very passionate.

Gabby’s amazing. - Yeah.

And you’re gonna do such a good job, Dr. Eliot!

Mm, it’s a beautiful script, babe.

You’re a beautiful script.

Come into bed, Doctor!

I’m ready for my physical!

Are you now? Yep.

As it happens, you are my favourite patient.

My favourite, most ticklish patient.

No!

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Oh yeah.

Oh fuck.

Kev.

Kev, Kev, Kev.

- Sorry. - Sorry, just a bit rough.

Oh, I’m sorry.

It’s okay, it’s okay.

- I’m sorry. - No, it’s okay.

We can keep going.

- Are you sure? - Yeah, yeah, of course, yeah.

- Just gentle. - Okay. Gentle.

Gentle, gentle, yeah.

Yeah, okay.

Oh yeah.

Doctor!

Oh yeah, oh!

Oh, Doctor!

Oh, you’re a good patient!

Am I?

Oh, you’re a good doctor!

Oh yeah!

Oh, fuck me, Doctor!

Fuck me!

Yeah, I’ll fuck you!

[birds c

Hello.

Hello.

Is this Lea Houston’s cottage?

Yes, I’m Lea Houston.

Oh, I heard about the show coming up

and I’d love to attend

but I’m heading into the city later tonight,

but I’m coming back tomorrow afternoon.

You know what?

We’re actually pushing the show to tomorrow night.

Oh! Well, then I’d love to come!

Okay, um, amazing!

I, I will reserve a seat for you and I’ll see you tomorrow.

Okay, I’ll see you then.

Great!

- Bye. - Bye!

No, sorry Gabby, it’s the, uh, the Robertson one.

I need the Robertson screwdriver.

It’s the one with the little...

No, sorry, it’s the, uh, here, let me have a quick look.

Um, we’re postponing the show.

- What? - What?

Holly Banks is coming.

Oh my god!

She just came by in her canoe

and said she wants to come to the show.

- This is huge! - I know!

No kidding!

But she can’t come tonight, she can only come tomorrow.

So we have to push the whole production.

Could you both stay an extra night?

It’s not a problem for me.

But do we need to let the other cottagers now?

Yeah, we’ll figure it out! We’ll figure it out!

Yeah, cool.

Um, I figured out what’s wrong with the pump, by the way.

Oh.

I think it’s gotta be a piece of loose tubing out there

in the lake.

So we’re gonna have some runnin water for dishes tonight.

Amazing! - Yeah.

Ah! I can’t believe this!

Oh, god this is amazing!

This is huge!

Okay, if she sees it and she likes it, then-

Okay, shit, maybe we need to focus a bit more

on the mise-en-scene.

- Yeah. - Yeah, yeah.

Uh, candles, what do you think?

Should we have some candles? - Yeah!

Okay, great.

Oh, wow, sorry.

This is so exciting!

This is wild! - Oh, uh-

I’m actually shaking.

When does Noah get here?

Um, later, like 3ish.

Okay, is he allergic to anything?

Try the water!

What? Try the water.

Oh, okay.

That was fast.

Oh my god.

Go, go, go, go, go, go!

I’m going.

Okay.

It works! What?!

- Oh my god, you legend! - That was really fast!

Wow. Ah!

I was thinking we need some more candles

which I think I have closer and maybe some string lights.

Oh yeah, some string lights along with that red fabric.

Yes, I love that fabric.

String lights...

and I will get some fabric, some red fabric.

It’s really nice.

It’s not finished yet.

Keep it up.

Ah, very, very nice.

I fucked up the lettering.

"Rapoonzel".

Shut up.

Oh, I’m sorry, babe.

It’s...it’s beautiful.

- Thanks. - Yeah, well done.

But Gabby...

Wow, this is actually really good.

Thanks!

Yeah, it’s amazing!

So you must paint a lot, eh?

Uh, yeah, when I’m in the mood.

Gabby paints a lot, you should see her studio.

You’ve got your own studio?

It’s a living room, not a studio but...

But you must show your stuff around town?

No, that’s not really my-

Gabby has big philosophies about making art.

Okay.

You do.

Big philosophies?

No, I just, um...

I just don’t think that making art

should be about being flashy or loud.

Painting is actually about being quiet and very small,

looking around the world and observing it.

You don’t need to share your art publicly

to be a successful artist.

All you really need is to be

honest and...

expressive.

Yeah.

But yeah, you don’t need flashy shows in flashy galleries

to be valid.

That’s a really beautiful attitude.

So are you gonna paint a whole bunch of these, or?

No, no, um, we’re just gonna photocopy them in town.

Right.

Of course, you’d be here all night painting posters

for the lake.

And we’ve got drinking to do.

Uh, anybody want one?

Oh, I’d share a beer with you.

Sure, I’ll have one. - All right.

Sweet!

Noah is bringing the wig, which will be great.

Gotta get some candles...

Got some candles in the closet, yes.

Oh my god, and I’ve got the string lights

from outside that I can put inside.

That’ll look so fricking good, yes!

Ooh, red fabric! Where is the red fabric?

Hey, can I talk to you for a sec?

Oh yeah, sorry, I’m just trying to figure this out, um...

- You okay? - No, yeah, I’m good!

Sorry, I’m just so excited, Gabs!

This is just big time, you know?

Don’t wanna fuck it up.

Have you eaten anything today? - Yes, I’m good.

I’m good, Gabby. - Are you sure?

Yes, I’m just fricking pumped!

Ah, good. - Hey.

Oh, Kevy, Kev, hi, uh, did you get the, yep, photocopies?

Got them there, yeah.

Do you want me to do the rounds dropping them off?

Oh, that would be amazing.

Thank you. Mwah! - Okay.

Thank you. - Hey.

Hey.

Sorry, I just need to sweep right there, thank you.

Have you seen the red fabric, you know the like big one?

Actually, I think I know where-

Sorry, could you just go look for it?

Yeah.

No, actually I know where it is.

Okay, I can go look for it.

With string lights and candles,

some dried flowers?

Oh my god, sorry, it’s gonna be amazing.

It’ll look so good!

Hi.

Hi.

What are you reading?

A book.

Yeah, I could see that.

Is this your cottage?

Yeah, um, it’s...

well, it’s my stepdad’s cottage,

but he’s, like, married to my mom,

so I guess...

I guess, yeah,

I don’t know.

Well, uh, we’re putting on a play

down at our cottage, number 27,

it’s "Rapunzel." Do you, uh...

do you like "Rapunzel?"

Are you in the show?

Yeah, I’m the lead actually.

So, it’d be good to see you there.

Hello?

Oh my god!

Noah, oh you’re here!

Wait, Gabby, Noah’s here!

It’s so nice to have you here!

It’s so nice to be here.

- How are you? - Do you have the wig?

I’ve got it right here.

- Hi! - Hey, Gabby!

- How are you? - Yay, you’re here!

It’s so nice to see you again.

Oh my god, it’s so good to see you.

It’s been way too long.

Way too long.

Noah.

Good to meet you, man.

- Nice to meet you. - Wow, you’re colourful.

This one won’t stop talking about you.

Is that right?

Need a hand with your stuff?

Yes please, there you go.

No problem.

Hey, I read your review in The Herald!

Are you excited?

I, yeah, I’m pumped, yeah.

I, I have not been sleeping very well.

I’m just like this vibrating ball of excitement!

Oh, I haven’t even told you,

Holly Banks is coming!

You’re fucking kidding me. - I’m not.

Are you serious? - Yes.

Oh my god, okay, I’m kinda nervous.

Oh, you’re good, you’re fine.

Okay, before we get started,

can I just like change up a little bit?

- Yeah! - Oh my god, of course, yes.

Kevin, can you show Noah his room please?

Yes, right over here.

Thank you.

♪ The gang’s back together ♪

Yeah.

- Here. - What?

It’s for you.

It’s a rock.

Yeah, I know.

It’s a rock for you.

Oh.

Thank you.

Do you wanna come in for a swim?

Oh no, I’m good. I’m just gonna read.

- Okay. - Thank you.

Woohoo!

Woo! Woo!

Yeah, that’s perfect.

Can you just stand a little closer together?

Yeah.

Good?

Yeah, that’s perfect.

Yeah, I like it.

Beautiful.

Yeah.

Can we get a few where Gabby’s sitting down?

Mm, yes, love that!

- Right? - Mmmhmm, yeah, okay.

Thank you.

Yeah, just like that.

Okay.

Yeah Gabby, right here.

Perfect.

Kevin, can you just put your arm around her shoulder?

Yeah.

- Yeah. - Good?

Yeah.

- Yeah. - I like that.

Perfect.

Kevin, can you just tilt your head a little bit to the left?

Thanks.

Beautiful, Gabby.

Yeah, right here.

Awesome.

- Hey. - Hey!

Do you need any help? - Sure.

So, how has..

Lea been doing recently?

What do you mean?

You know, with, um...

their stuff?

I don’t know.

With her mood. Oh! She’s good.

Like she hasn’t really been...?

Um, honestly, we haven’t spent this much time together

in a really long time,

so I don’t really, um...

I don’t really know what it looks like when she...

Goes crazy?

I really don’t like that word.

I love her.

I really do care a lot about her.

But there is just no other word to describe it.

So you’ve never seen it?

No.

Well, I, I’m glad that she’s feeling stable.

Knock on wood.

Yeah.

Sixteen people?

Yeah.

- Okay. - And only one kitchen.

Oh my god, and no one did their fucking dishes.

It was so gross!

It was... it was fun.

Yeah, it was.

The parties were so good.

Yeah, they were all right.

They were all right.

Dude, it was the hugest house,

like a mansion.

The backyard was probably

three times the size of the normal size.

Yeah, three. It was huge!

So we would throw the hugest party,

probably like 200 people.

And your brother would DJ the sets.

My brother, my brother did.

And in the summers,

we would invite a bunch of indie bands

and have like an art installation

playing in the backyard

where it was all happening at the same time!

Sounds amazing!

No, there was just so much alcohol poisoning.

Oh my god, and that sorority girl who threw that beer bottle

through the front window, do you remember?

And the homeless guy!

Oh fuck, the homeless guy who broke in through the back door

and watched her, what was her name?

What was her name?

Cherie! Yeah!

Just watched Cherie sleep!

Oh my god, could you imagine?

Could you imagine waking up

and there’s just this homeless guy staring at you?

It was, it was fun.

Not for Cherie.

Well...

you had fun.

Mm. I guess.

Yeah.

I mean, you were a little bit of a ho back then.

A bit of a ho?

Yeah. What?

What? No.

I mean, it’s true.

You know, every night,

a different man climbing up the fire escape.

A long string of gentlemen callers.

No, fuck off.

Fuck off, Noah.

What?

It’s true.

No, sorry, you got it all wrong.

We just drank tea and read poetry.

Hmm. No, we did!

No, they were gross!

They were disgusting!

They, they all smelled like herbal cigarettes

and didn’t trim their dirty fucking toenails.

God, they were gross, ugh.

And at the end of the day, they only cared about

their own satisfaction, if you know what I mean.

But all you did was read poetry?

Yes.

What? Yes.

We read the big poets and-

Gabby, where were you when all of this was happening?

Oh, I couldn’t afford to live at student hous-

Sorry, sorry, yes, sorry.

I couldn’t afford to live at student housing,

so I lived at home.

Sorry.

Gab, sorry, Gabby lived in a nunnery!

She couldn’t be out past 9:00 PM!

Ugh god, Gabby, you missed out on so much!

On so much living!

Do you remember Cherie used to have really loud sex

in the shower?

I just wish you would’ve been there, Gabby.

God, I wish you would’ve been there.

We were just so dumb and impulsive and alive!

God, ugh!

Yeah, Gabby really lived the life of a nun in her early 20s.

It sucked.

Um, I’m not feeling very well,

so I’m just gonna go outside for a bit.

Gabby?

Whoa.

What the fuck?

Oh fuck, fuck, fuck.

Uh, sorry, um...

What were we talking about?

I’m all over...

I’m all over, I’m all over the place, um...

You know, those other guys weren’t my favourite, you know?

You’re my favourite.

You’re my favourite baby.

You’re my favourite baby too.

Yeah?

Oh, it was just a wild time.

It was just a wild, wild time.

Yeah, why’d you leave?

Oh. Why did I leave?

Um, that’s a good question.

You got sick.

Sick?

Like the flu?

No, um...

Sorry, uh...

No, I...

I got sick and...

and sick and fat

and I just couldn’t live there anymore.

But I don’t, sorry, I don’t wanna talk about this.

I’m just a little embarrassed.

There is nothing embarrassing about manic depression, Lea.

Manic depression?

Are you- - Bipolar?

Uh...

Yeah, yeah, yep, yep, yep, that’s me.

Um... sorry.

Ah, fuck, uh...

just getting you, sorry, can you not tell-

can you not tell anybody?

Especially, um, especially Holly Banks.

I just, um...

I’m just a little, shh,

I’m just a little embarrassed to be sick like this.

There’s nothing embarrassing about it.

More people have it than you think.

Okay, um...

Hmm.

Do you...

Kevin, hello, uh,

do you know what bipolar is?

Like the character in your play.

Um...

So, yes.

Sometimes I get really, really sad and

sometimes I get really, really excited and then, um,

um, sometimes when I’m really sick,

I just go insane.

But...

ooh fuck, why... why are we talking?

Why are we talking about this?

Why are we talking about this?

We’ll talk...

we’ll talk about it tomorrow.

Yeah, that’s what we’ll do.

We’ll talk ab-

Uh, we’ll talk about it tomorrow

and, um, I’ll kiss you tomorrow

and why don’t I make brunch for everybody in the morning?

Yeah, that’s what, that’s what I’m gonna do.

Okay.

Okay, babe.

I’m gonna bring you over to the couch, okay?

- Okay. - All right, thank you.

Lift your arm.

There we go. All right, that’s it.

Okay. Okay.

I ran out of medication.

There you go, here you go.

What’d you say? - I ran...

Iran?

Yes, I would love to go to Iran.

There you go.

I ran out of medication.

That was a lot.

She shouldn’t be drinking.

Have you seen her like this before?

I’d like to be alone, please.

I had to live at home

because I couldn’t afford student housing but, um,

also because I was ,

I was taking care of my dad.

He was sick.

My mom worked night shift, so

I had to stay at home and take care of him.

So I couldn’t live in student housing.

And I feel like she doesn’t get it.

Like it feels like she forgets that other people exist,

that other people have problems and feelings.

Like, I’m...

I’m really happy that her art is taking off,

her writing but, I don’t know,

it feels like...

feels like she doesn’t put any...

any effort into my art.

And like, I’ve had little successes too.

Just because...

just because they’re not being written about

in a national newspaper,

doesn’t mean that they’re insignificant.

And she comes from a lot of privilege.

You know that, right?

That’s the problem with rich kids making art,

they think that all of their success

comes from their talent and not from their parents’ money

and their fancy fucking degrees and all their connections.

Not everybody has that.

I’m gonna have to move back.

I can’t keep up with rent in Toronto.

I’m not making enough money,

and I’m gonna have to move back home.

Life is shitty and unfair.

Not yours.

Look at your family.

Your dad!

Ugh, my dad’s a dick.

He didn’t treat my mom all that well

when we were growing up.

He didn’t treat me all that well either.

I’m sorry.

Sorry, I didn’t know that, uh, that was stupid.

That was a stupid thing to say.

Ugh.

Tomorrow’s gonna be great.

It’s gonna be great.

Like it’s a big deal for Lea

but it’s also a big deal for both of us.

I don’t know, maybe...

maybe we’ll get noticed

and something great will happen!

Who knows?

Hey.

Hi.

How’s the book coming?

It’s good.

Cool.

You look so pretty in your bikini.

Thanks.

Yeah.

I’m gonna keep rowing but, um, I’ll see you tonight?

Yeah, yeah, I’m excited.

My mom and my stepdad are also excited too.

Cool. I’ll catch you later.

- Morning. - Morning, how you feeling?

I need to take a shower.

You should eat something.

Can I make you some eggs or something?

Cereal’s good.

Fuck, no more drinking.

Morning. Morning!

Morning! Can I make you some eggs or something?

Uh, no, I’m good with cereal, thank you.

You excited to rehearse?

Yeah, looking forward to it.

Do you need any help setting up, Lea?

Like with the set?

Lea?

No, no, I’m good.

I can do it myself.

Um, I think I’m gonna get going.

What?

You’re not, you’re not staying for the show?

Fuck! Fuck!

Fuck, fuck, Noah!

Lea, are you okay?

I’m fine.

See you later, friend-o!

All right, stay well.

Noah.

Noah! Jeez.

Noah, wait!

Noah, slow down!

I can’t be with her when she’s like this.

Do you think that she-

Yes, she’s on her way to, just look, wait and see!

It’s all escalating!

I do love her but I just don’t have the bandwidth

to support her this time.

It’s gonna be okay ’cause we’re all...

we’re all here together, so...

You know what? I also fucking hate her art.

No offence, but she makes really bad art.

She’s like completely obsessed

with her own pains and struggles,

just like completely ignoring the real difficulties

that other people have!

And you know that.

I’m sorry.

I know you’re excited for the show tonight

and I do hope it goes well.

But I just can’t be here to watch.

Just take care of her, okay?

Yeah, I will.

Everything okay?

Yeah, I’m all right.

- You sure? - Mmmhmm.

Last night was pretty crazy.

I can’t really remember what...

You and Noah were sharing some memories from undergrad.

Right, yes.

It sounds like you had some fun.

I got into a lot of trouble.

Yeah, I heard all about the fire escape.

Shit. Did I-

So, like, how many are we talking?

I really don’t wanna talk about this.

Like five, ten?

It was so long ago, they were all just friends.

Twenty?

Uh, we just drank tea, so.

I’m sure you did a little bit more than just drink tea, babe.

Why do you care?

No, it’s just...

are you easy?

Fuck off, Kevin, seriously.

I don’t need this cross-examination.

No, it was kind of...

kinda turns me on a little bit.

But look, I just want to know

how many men?

Fuck off.

Hey, hey baby, I still love you and everything.

Even if you were a bit of a whore.

- Lea! - Fuck off, Kevin!

Hey.

Hey, I just wanted to apologize for storming off last night.

Sometimes I get emotional thinking about that time,

you know,

taking care of my dad.

And I know sometimes when I just think about everything,

I just get so sad.

You wanna talk about privilege?

What?

You think I’m just some overprivileged asshole

whose entire career was born out of the wealth of my family,

is that right?

Lea...

Why don’t we talk about the privilege

of having a healthy body, hmm?

You wanna talk about that kind of privilege?

Like, how would you like it if I came up to you

and said the only reason you’ve had success as an actor,

all the lead roles you’ve played over the years,

"Merry Wives of Windsor,"

"The Crucible,"

"Fiddler on the Roof".

The only reason you were cast in those roles

was because of the way you look

and the fact that you have a healthy body,

things that you can’t control.

How does that make you feel?

Do you feel it reduces you?

You know, like it, it completely ignores the possibility

that you may actually have something special going on?

Lea, I-

How many hours have you spent in the emergency room

restrained in a gurney,

forced to stare up at a white light?

How many thousands of dollars

have you spent on prescription medication?

How many hours have you wasted in bed

because you just couldn’t function?

Lea. Lea, I’m sorry. I, I didn’t mean-

You can have all the money in the world

but without your health, you have nothing!

So next time you feel like chewing me out

because my dad was a fucking dentist,

just remember I had to give up acting

because of my fucked up brain chemistry,

and you’re about to perform in front of Holly Banks.

Look at the quality of your life, Lea.

Look at everything you’ve written.

You still lead an incredibly rich life.

You know, so many people wish so badly

they could do what you do.

We’re gonna put all of this behind us

because there’s too much at stake right now.

Get ready, we’re rehearsing in ten.

Okay, uh, so Gabby,

remember that Rapunzel is lonely and sick, right?

And she’s, she’s been trapped in this attic,

like she’s trapped and she’s going crazy,

like, stir crazy, right?

And the first time that she sees Dr. Eliot,

it’s like seeing God himself.

He is the perfect man.

He’s kind and gentle and handsome and makes you laugh,

and he’s been leaving supplies at the foot of your house.

So with all of that in mind,

if we can just take it from where we left off.

The bed is gonna be here.

You’re gonna stand just a little bit forward.

Right here, that’s great. - Sorry, actually,

just before we start, Gabby,

I wanted to make sure that we’re still on the same page.

I, I know that we already talked about this,

but I just wanna make sure you’re gonna be okay

if I touch your hair around, uh,

- "It’s growing so long." - Yeah, that’s totally fine.

Okay, and also that I touch your hand a little bit,

sorry, just like this when I’m down next to the bed.

- Yeah. - Can we get going?

Please?

Great.

From you know where and whenever you’re ready.

So here she is trapped in her tower,

growing her hair long just waiting for him,

the perfect man,

the only person capable of saving her from her broken body

Okay, stop, stop.

You seem angry.

Rapunzel’s not angry.

She’s lonely and sick, not angry.

So if you can just do it again, just a bit more graceful.

I need to go. - What?

Yeah, I need to go. I need to leave for a bit.

We’re in the middle of rehearsal, Gabby.

Yeah, I just...

I can’t be here right now,

so I’m gonna go and we can rehearse later in the afternoon.

You’re about to perform in front of Ms. Banks.

This is a pivotal moment of all of our careers.

I’ll be back.

The show is at 7:00.

If you’re late, you’re fucking with all of us, Gabby!

Hi!

Hi, just right through here.

Hi, thanks for coming.

- Thanks. - Thank you.

Just through the curtain, thank you.

I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I fell asleep.

The wig’s in crew, go!

Ms. Banks, hi.

Holly is fine, please. - Holly, right.

I’m so glad you could come.

Of course.

Um, there’s a seat for you right through there.

Oh, thank you, Lea.

I’m excited for the show.

Oh, amazing.

Um, where can I find your bathroom?

Oh, bathroom, yes,

uh, second door on your right just down there.

Thank you, I’ll see you soon.

See you soon.

Okay, good.

Okay.

Rocky day.

I’ve been a bit hungover and emotional,

and we didn’t get as much rehearsal

as I would’ve liked,

but I believe we’re gonna be okay, yeah?

This is a big moment for all of us,

and I just...

I’m just gonna ask you to take a risk tonight, okay?

Do something different.

I want the audience to leave shocked and in awe.

- Of course. - Great. Um...

Lose, uh, lose the crown, Gabby.

Sorry, yeah, I don’t want it, um...

Just, yeah, it’s gonna get ruined.

Yeah, that’s better, that’s better.

Okay.

All right, I’m gonna make a short announcement

before the show.

I’ll hit the lights and you’ll know when to start.

Lea, sorry for interrupting

but I don’t think your taps are working.

Sorry?

The water from the taps, it’s not working.

Thanks for letting me know.

Hello all, thank you so much for coming,

it means a lot.

Um, my name is Lea Houston,

and I am just thrilled to share

this little piece with you tonight.

Uh, so it’s actually a small excerpt from a full play

that will be done at the Distillery Theatre

in Toronto next month.

Uh...

Just to give you some greater context of the piece,

um, it is a,

a story about a great plague

that has wiped out thousands of people in Rapunzel’s town

and Rapunzel is stuck in her attic

and is suffering from Bipolar Disorder.

And there’s a kind doctor in town, Dr. Eliot,

who has been leaving supplies at the foot of her bed,

uh, house, sorry,

and has been longing to come climb up the stairs,

and just now in this scene actually,

sorry, why, why am I giving it away, right?

So without further ado, here is "Rapunzel."

We don’t like stories about sick women.

We don’t like looking at sick women.

They are...

pitiful things,

full of problems.

When she was just a girl we promised her motherhood,

we promised her dinner parties

and form-fitting dresses and daughters to call her own.

We promised her

afternoons of berry picking

and homemade jam projects and morning aerobics classes.

But instead,

she grew up to be a sick woman,

weak in the joints

and sometimes unable to fill her own prescriptions.

We promised her health and happiness,

but instead it is 3:00 AM in the morning and she is very,

very

alone.

Trapped in her tower,

growing her hair long,

waiting for him,

the perfect man,

the only person capable of saving her

from her broken body.

But oh,

is that him?

Maybe I don’t want him to come.

No.

Oh no, no, no, no, no, no!

There goes my head again!

Racing, racing, racing!

I am sick.

I am too sick.

He won’t want me if he sees me like this.

No one will want me.

I am not fit for anything.

Not fit for love, not fit for marriage,

not fit for courtship.

No, I don’t want him to come.

He will only see what a colossal disappointment I am

as a human being.

Yesterday, I was in pain,

today I’m insane,

and tomorrow I’ll have a migraine.

No.

It’s better for me to be alone.

Do you hear that?

You may be handsome and kind

but it is better for me to be alone.

Don’t be silly, Rapunzel,

it’s no fun to be alone.

It’s bad for your health.

I have no health!

Exactly!

So why don’t you let me come up?

No, Dr. Eliot, I have the virus.

I don’t care if you have the virus.

I’m sick of throwing rocks at your window.

I’ve come to this forest every night this week

and I will not let you refuse my company once more.

Do you hate me that much?

I don’t hate you at all!

Then why don’t you let me come up?

It’s complicated.

You are a silly woman, Rapunzel

It’s true that some people don’t understand

but you can’t paint us all with the same brush!

There are people out there who will love you,

despite all those complications!

No one will love me.

And besides, anyone who-

Rapunzel, Rapunzel!

Anyone who comes near risks death.

Now you’re just being self-pitying.

Please let me up, Rapunzel.

I brought a bouquet of daisies,

and a poem written by my late father.

My mother, she loved daisies.

Oh, please let me up!

What was that old song she used to sing?

Throw me the key!

Will you bring up the daisies?

Of course.

♪ Daisy, daisy,

♪ Give me your answer, do

♪ I’m half crazy

♪ Over the love of you

♪ It won’t be a fancy marriage

♪ I can’t afford a carriage

♪ But you’d look sweet upon the seat

♪ Of a bicycle built for two ♪

♪ Daisy, daisy,

♪ Give me your answer, do

♪ I’m half crazy

♪ Over the love of you

♪ It won’t be a fancy marriage

♪ I can’t afford a carriage

♪ But you’d look sweet upon the seat

♪ Of a bicycle built for two ♪

No, Dr. Eliot, I have the virus.

I don’t care if you have the virus.

You shouldn’t be alone.

I am sick.

Sick in the joints, sick in the head,

and soon, sick in the lungs.

Sick people see beauty in the world

that goes ignored by healthier populations.

Daisies!

And a poem from your father?

Let me not to the marriage of true minds

admit impediments.

Love is not love which alters when it alterations find,

or bends with the remover to remove.

Oh no!

It is an ever-fixed mark

that looks on tempests and is never shaken.

It is the star to every wandering bark,

whose worth’s unknown, although his height be taken.

Your father didn’t write that!

You tricked me!

And I would trick you again

if it meant I could climb these stairs

and run my fingers through your hair.

It’s growing so long.

I’ve been going insane.

That’s just a story you’re telling yourself.

You’re good.

You’re better than good.

No, I am dying, Dr. Eliot.

And soon you’ll be dying too.

So long as blood runs through this tired frame,

so long as Leonardo paints his faces

and Claude paints his lily pads,

and so long as rain clouds create rainstorms

and poets create poetry

and so long as the florist at the corner

sells cheap daisies for penniless lovers,

then I am here for you.

I don’t care that you’re sick!

And I will sit here all night long if I need to.

I will hold your hand...

and I will scare away all of the hob-

all the hobgoblins that keep you up at night.

And if you die,

if you’re sick with the plague,

then I will die with you.

You are safe with me by your side.

If every person in danger had a man like you by their side,

all the world’s suffering

would quickly turn into something more gentle.

They’d all start whistling in their beds.

No.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, Rapunzel.

Rapunzel, no, my love, you can’t!

I’m following you, just moments behind.

You are gone and I will go with you.

I am your person,

your only person ,

and the darkness will not change any of that.

Thanks so much for coming.

It’s really great that you were able to make it.

Congratulations, you did a really good job.

I appreciate that so much.

Did you have a favourite part or...?

All of it was amazing.

It was a great time.

Thank you so much for coming.

- Wonderful event. - Thank you, thank you.

Just wonderful. Thank you. - Thanks for coming.

Thank you. - Bye.

Thanks for coming.

Thank you so much. Goodnight.

Cool, yeah, I’m sure you’ll be great at it someday.

Yeah.

Thanks for inviting us. Yeah, for sure.

Absolutely, no problem.

See ya.

So?

What the fuck?

What the fuck was that?

I thought that went well.

What was that fucking sex scene at the end there?

Oh.

We didn’t rehearse any of that!

Fuck!

Were you involved in this new blocking, Gabby?

No, I had no idea, he just-

Yeah, I’m sure you had nothing to do with it, yeah.

He just fucking sprung that on me!

- Okay. - It worked well!

Did you see Ms. Banks?

She just left!

She didn’t say goodbye, she didn’t say anything.

She just stormed out, she fucking hated it!

This is a failure!

It’s a huge failure!

It’s autobiography, right, Lea?

Like when that string of gentlemen callers

came up to your apartment on the third floor,

they didn’t just sit around and read poetry, babe, okay?

There was a little more action than that, I’m sure of it.

It’s better to portray the truth than some fanciful fiction.

I’m going to bed.

Blow out the candles before you leave.

Lea. Lea!

Lea, hey.

Hey, that went well!

Didn’t you hear the applause?

You fucked it up, Gabby.

Rapunzel’s supposed to be virginal, okay?

She’s supposed to be chaste.

It was supposed to be a really

fucking innocent little scene there.

I’m sorry, Kevin just-

Don’t act like you didn’t like it.

I’ve seen the way you’ve been looking at him.

At Kevin? Mmmhmm.

No.

Lea, are you okay?

You just seem a little off.

I’m fine, I’m just exhausted.

It’s been an exhausting day full of a lot of bullshit.

Is this because of what I said about the privilege?

I’m sorry.

I didn’t mean to upset you.

It hurts to be diminished like that.

I just need to go to bed.

I just need to go to fucking bed.

♪ Away in a manger

♪ No crib for a bed

♪ And the little Lord Jesus

♪ Laid down His sweet head ♪

Hey.

Hey, hey.

What’s, what’s happening?

I’m building a little manger.

What?

I’m building a little manger

so I need a lot of soft materials,

like soft towels.

Can, can you go and get me some towels, please?

Hey, what’s happening?

What is all this stuff?

♪ Away in a manger ♪

What are you doing?

- Lea? - Oh no.

My name isn’t Lea.

My name is Mary,

the Virgin Mary.

Are you okay?

Yeah, this is what Kevin wants.

He wants an untouched woman,

so here I am, the mother of all.

Lea, you’re not...

you’re not all right now and you’re not thinking right.

You’re not thinking right.

I’m the Virgin fucking Mary!

The most perfect woman that ever was!

What’s going on?

Lea?

You’re here.

You’re here, you’re here, you’re here.

Okay, sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down.

What are you doing? - Sit down, please.

Ladies and gentlemen,

for one night only here at Fortescue Lake.

Welcome to the show.

Lea.

Lea.

Hey, hey, Lea.

Fuck, okay.

Kevin, can you call an ambulance?

It’ll take an hour to get out here.

Throw away your phones, please, please.

Please, just sit, sit, sit, sit.

I will do whatever you want me to do, okay?

Okay, just after the show,

just indulge me for one quick moment

and then I’m in your hands, okay?

Okay? Okay?

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you.

All little girls learn about how to be women

from the stories we hear as children.

We hear about princesses and we hear about witches.

But the most important person I ever heard about

was the Virgin Mary.

That’s me.

Lea, this is- - Shhhhhh!

The audience doesn’t talk during the presentation, Kevin!

Mary was perfect,

she was perfect, she was perfect,

perfect, perfect, perfect, perfect, perfect, perfect!

And all the other women wanted to be like her.

And you know what else?

Actually, this is where we do have some

audience participation,

so you’ll love this bit, Kevin.

Okay, I’m gonna say "You know what else?"

And you’re gonna say "What, Mary?"

Ready?

And you know what else?

Lea.

No, sorry.

You’re not,

you’re not doing it right.

I’m gonna say, "You know what else?"

You say "What?" I’ll do it again.

You know what else?

What, Mary?

All the women in those stories who fucked around

really, really, really, really, really, really,

really bad, like so bad,

like all the men could fuck around as much as they wanted

but the women, they were whores!

The worst kind of person to be.

Okay, that’s it.

Lea, you’re sick right now, okay?

Show’s over. Wrap it up!

That’s why I went all the way back in time, Kevin.

I went all the way back in time.

I’m the Virgin Mary,

untouched, just like you prefer.

You’re crazy, Lea.

You’re going crazy.

Okay, that is not,

that is not helpful right now.

I’m giving myself to you, Kevin.

I’m the Virgin Mary!

Okay, Lea, I can’t.

Could you just fucking chill, please.

I’m calling for help.

Oh, come, yeah, no, come, like, like,

like little ballerinas, Kevin?

Tell me, how young do you think those ballerinas were, hmm?

In the Degas paintings?

How, how young do you think they were?

You’re crazy, Lea.

You’re a crazy fucking bitch!

Oh, am I? But like tell me, Kevin,

how young do you think those girls were?

Just on the brink of adulthood?

Fuck off! - Hmm?

You’re a fucking asshole, Kevin!

- Get the fuck off me! - You’re a fucking asshole!

It’s just a painting!

Kevin, Kevin, put me down.

Get off me. Get off, Kevin.

Kevin, get off of her. - She hit me.

Kevin, get off of her, you’re hurting her!

You’re hurting her!

She attacked me, Gabby.

She’s crazy!

- What if she grabbed a knife? - - Ow!

Kevin, get the fuck off of her!

Get your shit packed and get the fuck out of here

or I’m gonna call the cops!

She’s gonna-

She’s not gonna do anything.

I’m not gonna hurt you, just get off me, please.

You guys are fucked up!

Fucked up women.

Lea!

Fuck!

Lea! Lea!

Lea!

Lea! Lea!

Please come back.

No.

Please.

Lea.

Hi.

Are you okay?

No.

Come on.

Are you gonna stay out here forever?

Until I die.

No one’s ever gonna love me properly, G.

I love you.

Come on.

Hey, babe.

You okay?

Do you need anything?

No.

- Okay. - Okay.

I’m heading into town to pick up your lithium.

I’ll be back soon.

The kindly badger thrust them down on a settle

to toast themselves at the fire,

and bade them remove their wet coats and boots.

In the embracing light and warmth,

warm and dry at last,

with weary legs propped up in front of them.

But when they actually saw, at last, the supper

that was spread for them,

really it seemed only a question

of what they should attack first,

where all was so attractive.

It’s beautiful.

Thanks.

How you doing?

Good.

Hanging in there?

Yeah.

Good.

Oh gosh, mm.

Cool.

- Yeah! - You did it.

You’re incredible, wow.

Ah!