Original subtitles

And how long have you been a superhero?

Me? Well, I guess I've always been a superhero.

I don't know much else.

Arthur, what's the tick really like?

The tick? He's great. He's a little hard to work with sometimes, but he's

stronger than anybody.

Listen, ours is an epic tale. True friendship. Heart -stopping danger.

Men and women in tights. Making the rules and breaking them. We are not two

We are ten men. Listen!

It all started in Reno.

Every year, heroes flock to the National Super Institute to compete for the best

cities to protect from crime.

Ladies and gentlemen, the Blowfish Avenger.

Blowfish at New Rochelle. Way to go, Blowfish.

One year, I decided to compete.

Now you may ask, but how does one prove one's mightiness? To this I reply by

surviving the deadliest engine of destruction 1974 had to offer.

Ladies and gentlemen, you may want to shield yourselves with your dessert

I might be dangerous.

Well, this is disappointing.

Whoa.

And the rest is history.

Thank you.

Destiny's powerful hand has made the bed of my future.

And it's up to me to lie in it. I am destined to be a superhero.

To right wrongs and pound two -fisted justice into the hearts of evildoers

everywhere.

You don't fight destiny. No, sir.

And you don't eat crackers in the bed of your future. Or you get all...

Scratchy. Hey, I'm narrating here.

They've assigned me a city.

My mission? To free it from the ravages of evil and supervillainy. So its

citizens may sleep easy.

Secure in the knowledge that they are protected.

The city.

My, the city.

It cries to me of its need.

Excuse me.

Arthur? Yes, Mr. Wieterspan?

Arthur, I'm afraid the firm feels that it's time to allow you the opportunity

pursue other avenues of employment.

I'm fired?

Is there a problem with my work? Oh, no, Arthur. No, it's... It's that stupid

bunny outfit.

Oh, no. Not bunny, sir. Moth.

It's my moth suit. Actually, it's a flying suit. The wings are in my

Arthur, you're making the other accountants nervous.

We all find this kind of rampant individuality very disturbing.

I know you think I'm crazy, Mr. Wieterspan, but I'm not.

It's just, ever since I found this suit, I felt strange new needs, urges.

I can't live this life a moment longer.

Somewhere out there, a destiny of adventure and excitement waits for me.

Accounting is a fine skill to fall back on, but the road less traveled. Much

less traveled. The Moth Suit and Wings Road is a lot more exciting than taxes.

It is I, the Tick, your destined defender.

Show me where it hurts.

Oh,

there's crime here. I can smell it. I can taste it.

So shall I begin my first patrol of the city with one giant leap.

Soon, they will know me.

Soon, they will need me.

Well, great.

Now I'm unemployed.

How am I going to find adventure and excitement when I can't even cover my

expenses?

And double snip!

Aha!

I'll bounce off that flagpole and flip to safety.

Aha!

I'll bounce off that broad, flat surface.

I don't eat out. And reverse my underwear to get an extra day.

Or maybe not.

Gravity is a harsh mistress.

Are you all right?

I'm fine. I'm a superhero.

I'm nigh invulnerable.

I'm built for this kind of thing.

Nice outfit.

A superhero?

Known to evildoers everywhere as the... Tick. I'm Arthur, known to taxpayers

everywhere as the accountant.

I'm looking for adventure.

Come have lunch with me, Arthur.

Adventure will follow.

Why would they send a superhero of my caliber to a place like this?

Oh, I'm not sure this city even needs a champion.

Oh, you're a superhero, huh? And what sort of costume is that supposed to be?

Costume? No costume, friend.

I am simply the Tick. Well, you can't be the Tick.

Ticks are arachnids. They got eight legs.

How do you know I don't? Ticks suck blood. Do you suck blood?

Uh, yeah, I suck blood all the time. Yeah, right.

Look, I got a straw right here, pal. You want a demonstration?

No, no. No, no, thanks. No.

An explosion.

Come, Arthur. Evil is afoot.

Afoot? That's funny. I have only seconds to shed my everyday disguise.

This looks like a job for... There's somebody in here.

Occupied.

This looks like a job for... The Cape Chameleon!

This is definitely illegal.

Arthur,

do you fly?

My wings are in my briefcase.

Back at the diner. I'll go get them.

No time, chum.

I think I'll just lie down here for a second.

Criminals! You face the sworn protector of this fair city, you face the tick.

Speak up! I can't understand a word you're saying through those stupid

Are we dead yet?

Far from it, Arthur. We have them on the run.

Hey, cool.

They got a blimp.

That was the scene today at the Reeve Droit Bank as the mysterious gang known

the Idea Men struck again, continuing their terrible crime wave.

It was the sixth time in as many days that the baffling criminals have

from the sky.

the city's most valued assets.

But today, their nefarious plot was thwarted by an heroic blue stranger.

Hey, cool.

They got a blimp.

Our modest blue benefactor exited the scene without comment.

The idea, Mad Menace, is far from over, says Mayor Blank. In fact, we have

reason to believe that these criminals have been merely practicing for a much

larger caper. We'll have more on this story as it develops.

Meanwhile, on a lighter note...

I always have trouble with these keys.

Well, this is my place.

What do you think?

It's great. It looks just like an apartment.

Where's your secret headquarters trigger?

Is this it?

No, wait.

You know, the trigger. Like a statue or a candlestick that you twist and then

everything flips over and all your crime -busting equipment pops out. This is

it, right? Ah, no.

What does your sofa turn into? Your sonar radar perimeter. Does it sense

No. It turns into a bed.

Please, this is just an apartment.

It is?

Yes, yes!

Well, this place is going to take a lot of work if it's going to be our

superhero headquarters.

No! Oh, I don't know. I just don't know if I'm ready for this. Too much

excitement, too much adventure.

I think I'm going crazy.

You're not going crazy, Arthur.

You're going sane in a crazy world.

Some people are destined for greater things.

Arthur, you are one of those people.

You can't hide from it. You've got to hug it.

Hug your destiny, Arthur.

Hug it.

Uh -huh.

Well, I think I'll just sleep on it, okay?

That's fine, my small friend.

You rest up, and I will monitor the culture.

Taste me.

That's Drama Flakes Tasty Challenge.

Attractive, successful people love Drama Flakes.

Guaranteed to make your life more dramatic and eventful with every golden

spoonful. Just listen to them get an earful.

Good evening. This is Sally Vacuum with a special report.

I'm here at the city hydroelectric plant.

Apparently the notorious idea men have taken the city dam hostage.

Although we can't understand a word they're saying.

What?

I'm sorry we didn't get that.

Good heavens.

They're going to flood the city.

Arthur, get up. The city calls upon her steadfast protectors.

What? This looks like a job for bipolar bear.

But I just can't seem to get out of bed this month.

This looks like a job for Captain Lemming.

Come on, Spine. Work with me.

Excuse me, miss. I've got to change my outfit.

This looks like a job for the human bullet.

Fire me, boy.

Get those wings on, Arthur.

This isn't such a good idea. The wings. Put them on. I'm not so good at this.

You'll get better. I've never flown before.

Not a problem.

No. No.

No. No. No. Change my mind. I want to come down.

It's your destiny, Arthur.

Hug it.

very frightened.

No, Arthur, you're very flying.

You see, no more doubting yourself.

Now, on to the death. We have work to do.

What happens now?

Wow. Wow.

All out of roofs, eh?

Uh, yeah. Guess so.

Deflator mouth.

I should have known you'd be out tonight.

Well, if it isn't American made. The world's most patriotic domestic.

This looks like a job for deflator mouth.

Not some mop squeezer. Why don't you go...

Scrub out a toilet somewhere.

Why don't you go smell up some cave?

People, people, there's a dam about to blow up. We should team up and use all

our resources to battle this evil. Team up? I'm not going to team up with her.

There's that fear of commitment again.

Oh, listen to Miss Intimacy here.

Jerk. Jingoist. Rabid goon. Clean freak. Nerf. Ice cream. Some people just

shouldn't be in this business.

You are so... To the dam!

But how?

We'll figure it out.

are so incredibly immature.

Amateurs. None of them really know how to handle evil.

This looks like a job for Big Shot.

The

mayor

is just now arriving and it looks like he's brought the ransom money.

Mayor Blank, are you actually going to give in to the idea of men's criminal

demands? Well, Sally, let me put it this way.

How well can you swim?

But seriously, we have no choice. They have our dam and no force on Earth can

stop them now.

Let's see, 15 % of... Arthur, onward!

Oh, just keep the change.

Seconds from now, the mayor will hand over a briefcase containing 10 million

municipal dollars, the biggest ransom ever paid in the city's history.

They must have gotten their money.

They got their money and they're still going to blow up the dam.

Oh, no fair.

Okay, idea man, what's the big idea?

Well, we thought we'd steal a lot of money, and then we'd be rich, and we

wouldn't have to work anymore.

You cads!

Now turn off your bomb!

We can't. Once it's activated, it can't be shut off.

What are you doing?

Shh! I'm defusing it.

Guns and superheroes don't mix.

Seek professional help.

My goodness!

I'm a walking time bomb!

Get out of my way!

Why didn't you love me, Mom?

Guess we saved the city.

For the moment, yes, my friend. But with luck, our future holds still more dire

threats, more perilous plots.

Wherever villainy rears its great big head, wherever evil sets its giant, ill

-smelling foot, you will find the tick.

Oh, and Arthur is a sidekick.

Good show.

And yes, my sidekick Arthur. Certainly a force to be reckoned with.

And so, may evil beware. And may good dress warmly and eat plenty of fresh

vegetables.

I'm okay.