Original subtitles

A nuclear event would be a tragedy.

- But also an opportunity. - Mr. Howard?

Huge fan. I'm Henry, but everyone calls me Hank.

If the American government needs a hand

in settling our more international disputes,

well, they know who to call.

Are you familiar with Robert House?

Are you asking me to spy on the wealthiest man in America?

Not spy on him.

Your wife is going to Vegas next week

to sell Cold Fusion to Robert House.

When the bombs drop, it'll be Robert House

that presses the button.

I'm in Vegas these days, back in your old stomping grounds.

Trying to pick up where you all left off.

When this is all over, you will be begging me to help you.

- I was Bud's personal assistant. - Hm.

"Future Enterprise Ventures"?

The whole plan for Vaults 32 and 33?

Phase 2 was very important to the experiment.

I know you think you being helpful

shootin' folks in the kneecaps and the ass.

Ah, fuck!

I'm not gonna apologize for not murdering people.

My name is Diane Welch,

congresswoman for the District of Glendale.

I don't think America can afford

any more corporate influence in Washington.

I take it you're not a vet.

'Til next time, Mr. Howard.

Got any cigarettes? I'd like to try one.

One addiction at a time.

Before we start, there's the small matter of my fee.

Fusion Core?

You don't see those around much anymore, do you?

Okey-dokey.

I defer to you about what to do in this situation.

Run.

Do you have any more drugs? I really think I need some more drugs.

- You have any more? - Drugs?

No, I ain't got any more drugs!

Okay, then which weapon would you recommend for this?

- You got a rocket launcher in that bag? - Nope.

So, this is Vegas, huh?

Yep.

And those surprisingly smelly lizard monster bull things?

Have they always been here?

Nope.

Okay.

I'd ask why my dad ran into a den of giant monsters,

but you'd probably just tell me to shut the fudge up.

Before the war, there was a plan...

for a special Vault.

A Vault for management.

That's where my wife is.

Where my daughter is, too.

You never found it?

Oh no, I found one, in California.

It was empty.

Found another one in Oregon.

It was empty, too.

Turns out, there's more than a few special Vaults for management

sprinkled across the Wasteland.

All of 'em empty.

But I've never found one in Vegas.

So, you think if my dad's in there,

maybe your wife and daughter are, too?

Uh-huh.

And now, they're surrounded by these fuckin' things.

I think we should just go in there and get them.

You can't just waltz past a pack of Deathclaws.

They're called Deathclaws?

Look, I know it's not an ideal situation, but we...

Oh, uh, I'm okay. Thank you so much.

But nothing is, up here, right?

Now, I'll admit, I am in an altered mental state

but I think we should just shoot these monsters in the face.

And frankly, whatever we do, we need to do it quickly,

'cause I am very much out of drugs.

Take this.

There's a general store over there called Sonny's.

Ask for somethin' called Addictol.

It'll clean out all that shit you got runnin' through your veins.

Hey, maybe they'll have something to take down one of those lizards.

I wouldn't bet on it.

Where are you going?

To get fucked up.

Whiskey.

The bottle.

Guess you saw them Deathclaw things

come up from Quarry Junction.

They fightin' around the Strip.

Big whup.

Just another fuckin' round o' change in management's all it is.

Like one of 'em merry-go-rounds.

NCR. Legion. NCR. Legion.

Fuckin' robots.

No matter to me.

Always somebody tryna tell us what to do.

Long as they don't come 'round and charge me taxes,

I don't give a fuck.

Don't try to charge me taxes, lizard.

- I'll shoot your goddamn head off. - Stop...

talkin'.

While the government twiddles thumbs

at the negotiating table with our communist adversaries

from across the Pacific,

Captains of Industry gather in Las Vegas, Nevada,

to decide the fate of the free world.

And the leader of this historic summit?

Robert Edwin House, founder of RobCo,

the nation's leading robotics manufacturer.

So, what does this titan of the private sector

think about his odds at succeeding where the government has failed?

Where I come from, which is America,

the House always wins.

Mrs. Howard! Mrs. Howard! Coop! Hey.

I'm sorry I'm late. Uh, let me take your bags to the gate.

It looks like you already got your hands full.

Oh! I'm suddenly a very important person

and a possible assassination target.

- We'll meet you at the gate, Hank. - Okay!

Uh, you go ahead.

I gotta call my agent.

Alright.

Glad you chose to do the right thing.

Is that what you call killing a man?

Check the coin return.

If Robert House gets Cold Fusion, Vault-Tec gets the bombs.

This is the only way to stop it.

- Is this what I think it is? - You're a soldier.

You've killed before.

In uniform.

Wearing a costume doesn't make it any better.

I am giving you the opportunity to save countless lives

in exchange for one.

I think in this case, the ends justify the means.

You know, people've been saying shit like that for years.

I tell you what.

I'll stop the exchange. I'll get your Cold Fusion back.

But I'm not gonna kill a man to do it.

Corporate greed has no place in government!

Please, remain calm.

Hey, you sold us out!

There's a Vault-Tec hotel?

Your ad campaign has been an enormous success.

Yeah. Ah.

What a crazy world.

- Hello. I'm a big fan. - Oh yeah, okay. Sure.

Private companies shouldn't be allowed

to unilaterally dictate American policy.

I deserve to be part of this conversation.

I'm a United States congresswoman!

Oh! That's Congresswoman Welch...

Hey, here.

- I'm really sorry about that. - No, it's fine.

Fighting the good fight is mostly a series of humiliations.

Coop?

Keep at it.

Oh, I, uh, I need to talk to those reps from RobCo.

- Care to join? - What do you think?

I'm gonna get a couple of drinks. Nukatini?

These government knuckleheads can't solve anything.

It's up to us.

Government should be run like a business.

Thank you.

- It's Robert House! - There he is!

Mr. House would like to see you.

Well, howdy, pardner.

Howdy.

Right this way!

Hello!

I'm Robert House.

From the fuckin' toilet?

I apologize, I was just very eager to meet you.

Now...

I know that you came to Vegas to kill me.

Did you not?

Die! Die! Die!

Let's get lucky, shall we?

Hello, gorgeous.

How I've missed you.

I'll admit you'd be disappointed in how I've behaved

since we've been apart, but...

you can't begrudge a man for filling the void, can you?

Fully Integrated Security Technotronic Officer

active and reporting for duty.

That makes two of us.

Oh, a looky-loo, eh?

Go watch from behind a shrub or something, like a civilized pervert.

Now, where were we?

How would you like to forget everything you've ever known?

Everyone you've ever known?

Your language and motor skills will remain intact.

But every choice you've made, every moment you've cherished,

will be completely and utterly removed from your memory.

Please. Yes.

Oh. Oh.

Ooh.

Ooh, good gracious!

Ooh!

Oh, no, no, no, no. Oh, no, no!

No, no, no, no, no!

Nooo!

Let's begin.

Ew, it's so dirty in here.

It's like walking on garbage.

One of these guys must be the janitor.

- Guys? We really need... - Hey, look.

It's Janice.

Ugh, still at her desk. Yeesh.

- She always was a kiss-ass. - Yeah.

I need to craft a weapon.

We should get outta here.

This is my squat.

- It's our squat. - They know what I mean.

Well, I'll be.

More Vault Dwellers.

What do you mean, "more Vault Dwellers"?

Can I ask you a question?

Mm-hmm.

What is making that noise in the elevator?

Roach farm.

How big are they?

Not big enough for market yet, but they'll get there.

So, you met my sister?

Yeah, back in Filly.

Before the Brotherhood of Steel burnt it down.

Had her help a fella from the Enclave

get through the Shithole to some folks from the NCR

who weren't in town when Shady Sands blew up.

Pretty slim odds.

What with it being Khan country.

- What? - Hmm?

I don't understand what any of that means.

Oh, I'm sorry. I forget you Vaulties

don't much care for current events.

Your sister is dead, honey.

You don't know that.

You don't know my sister.

I know the Wasteland better than you do.

And I know plenty well what it does

to folks as soft as you all are.

Now, I wanna tell you what I told her.

And for y'all's sake, I hope you listen.

Go home, Vaultie.

Let's go, Barv.

If you idiots need supplies for the trip home, help yourselves.

But don't you touch my roach farm.

Good luck, dipshits.

Suddenly, you're a big Samaritan, huh?

Baby, shut the fuck up. I'm trying to be a better person.

- Come on. - Yeah!

What are you doing?

Uh, n...

I... I just, um... I came in the wrong door, so...

Are you... Sonny?

He left town.

Okay.

So...

he's not in that trash can behind me?

No.

That's the guy who tried to rob the place.

And he's naked.

So...

did he come in here naked?

Yeah.

I mean, it's not weird for someone to rob a store naked.

Lots of people do it, okay?

Anyway, I'm just gonna be leaving now,

and you're not gonna shoot me as I go.

Sir, don't touch that gun. If you touch that gun,

I'm gonna have to maim you.

Sir, I'm sorry, I...

Oh, gosh.

Oh.

Who are you?

I don't know.

Mr. Howard.

I've been following you for some time.

- Have you? - Oh, don't worry.

I'm not a crazed fan of one of your films.

Unlike Edison and some of the rest, I don't care for fiction.

It's not real. Doesn't matter.

My interest in you, though, on the other hand...

well, that does matter.

- How you figure that? - Our destinies are, um...

mathematically intertwined.

How long have you been pretending to be this guy?

About ten years.

Ten years.

It's a living.

Mr. Howard.

Come down here.

Let's you and I talk.

I'm not gonna come down there.

- Come down here. - I don't want to come down there.

Mr. Howard, I was there with you in Alaska.

I doubt that very much.

Not physically, of course.

I'm not insane.

But I did license a piece of software to West Tek,

which gave me access to the T-45 Armor you wore.

So, I saw what you saw.

I saw it all.

I saw the demon in the snow.

And I believe that it's connected to the future of this great nation.

And to your wife.

Like yourself, Mr. Howard,

I am an apex competitor.

We are the very best at what we do.

And what I do, is I know everything.

I know who is making what technology,

and I acquire that technology at the most lucrative moment

in its span of functionality.

This week, I'm acquiring Cold Fusion from Vault-Tec.

From my wife.

Correct.

It will allow me to stay alive indefinitely

in roboticized, non-biological form and protect Las Vegas

from the coming nuclear war.

Initiated by my wife.

Hmm.

Unclear.

By Vault-Tec, then?

No, I doubt that, despite what we've both heard in that meeting.

Vault-Tec is a collision of bureaucrats.

Your wife, though...

I don't know.

You said you knew everything.

I routinely design and run mathematical paradigms

based on global, political, and socioeconomic conditions

in an effort to... predict future events.

And one spring morning, the data coalesced,

and it told me, in no uncertain terms,

that the world would...

well, end.

Calculator told you that?

The date of the end of the world

may not interest you, Mr. Howard.

But the date the data coalesced might.

April 14th, 2065, at 5:17 a.m.

Is that date of any interest to you?

That's my daughter's birthday.

Oh, that is vexingly curious, isn't it?

More curious is that you were not meant to come to Vegas this weekend.

Your wife Barbara was meant to come alone.

The moment that you bought your ticket to Las Vegas,

the date the world was going to end...

jumped forward by one month.

What are you, a f-fortune teller now?

I am a mathematician, a roboticist, and a casino owner.

And I don't know yet how you figure into all of this,

but you most certainly do.

And I don't like unknown variables.

Irksome.

Not knowing exactly how you play a part in ending the world.

You know, the...

person who wanted me to kill you, you know what they think?

They think that you are gonna end things

by selling Vault-Tec the weapons it needs.

No.

The bombs will not be dropped by me or any of the idiots at that meeting.

What I believe...

I believe there is a...

another player at the table.

The same unknown entity

responsible for your demon in the snow.

- Who? - I don't know.

It's like I said. Irksome.

As you see, I live my life by one simple maxim.

- The House always wins, right? - And it does.

I'm making sure of it using every single piece

of technology at my disposal.

But what if I'm not the House?

What if someone else is?

What if you're just a fucking lunatic?

I'm a lunatic?

Yeah.

I would encourage you to gaze inward, Mr. Howard,

to your small life,

spending your days pretending to be a cowboy,

while your wife is making apocalyptic proposals

at board meetings, and I'm building a missile system

to defend this glorious city from what's coming.

But from whom, Mr. Howard?

From whom?

Who ends the world?

Is it you? What if it is you?

I don't think you're a cowboy at all, no.

I think you're a killer!

I think I know exactly who you are!

Alright. Comms Room.

Clark, Pete, with me.

It's dead.

Who were you hoping to contact?

The investors.

Hey, Clark, you're project manager. Get this operational, stat.

Shouldn't take long.

Hey, Pete, go try that one.

You okay?

Sorry.

You'd think it would have all hit me at once, but, uh...

Nope.

Even if my parents survived the bombs, they'd be gone by now.

Same with my friends.

My cat.

Your cat have a name?

His name was Puppy.

- Puppy the cat. - It's funny, huh?

I mean, not right now, I guess.

Yeah.

You don't strike me as the kind of person

who would sign up for a program like this.

Did you know going in about the Future Enterprise Ventures?

Like I said, I just started this job a week ago.

But everything these people talked about sounded pretty nutty to me.

But you don't remember what they said?

Nothing about doing something to the people in Vault 32 or 33?

No.

There was this exec.

Bud's boss? Her name was Barbara Howard.

She was in charge of all the Vault proposals.

Do you know where her office is?

You're not really Bud's successor, are you?

How'd you know?

Mm.

Because you're not absolutely nuts?

Thank you?

But the rest of them, they are nuts.

I mean, they bet their whole lives on Bud Askins

and his weird multi-millennial plan.

If they realize you took that from them,

there's no telling what they'll do.

Sorry if that came across as a little dramatic.

But in my defense, I did just see the world end, like, a week ago.

I could really use a drink.

Do you want a drink?

- I've actually never had one. - Really?

I'll be right back.

Future Enterprise Ventures.

F... E-V.

Forced Evolutionary Virus.

You lied to us.

I think we can say I am officially done with dru...

Window.

Watch it!

You done?

Thanks.

Least I can do, considering.

Who's that?

I'll let him explain.

Hi!

I was sent here by your father.

Mr. MacLean is very impressed that you've followed him this far,

but he's quite secure in an underground facility.

There's no reaching him from here,

not without his explicit invitation.

You're gonna walk right back out of here and lead us to my father, now.

Unfortunately, I don't have permission.

Mr. MacLean is watching over this gentleman's wife and daughter.

They are quite peacefully resting in stasis.

And wouldn't it be a shame if Mr. MacLean

had to terminate that slumber prematurely?

They almost assuredly wouldn't survive the process.

Don't listen to him. Whatever it is, we can't trust him.

However, Mr. MacLean is willing to make a deal,

one family's safety for another's.

Mr. MacLean will leave your wife and daughter

safe and sound in their cryo chambers

if you bring his daughter back to the safety of her Vault.

- What? - Your father is in the process

of setting certain plans in motion.

He'd like it if you'd be able to wait it out,

safe and sound, back at home.

Do you accept?

You can't actually be considering this.

Lucy, I brought you here to bargain with.

This is the bargain.

We were actually beginning to get along.

Yeah.

Mm, wonderful!

I'll inform management that you made an agreeable decision.

Good afternoon.

Take a nap.

When you wake up, you'll be home.

Couldn't be helped.

Family's a fucked-up thing.

Oh, my God. Cooper Howard! Can I have a kiss?

You have to ride the missile!

I thought we were friends.

We need to talk.

My little Sugarbomb.