All language subtitles for sul e4

Oh, this is getting pretty dark.

Welcome to Sexy Urban Legends, the show
dedicated to all those demon stories

everyone's heard and everyone swears are
true. I'm Tony. And I'm Mick. Our first

Sexy Urban Legend focuses on a grand
tradition that all true -blooded

men would gladly lay their lives down to
defend.

Spring Break.

Yes, sir.

Nothing beats the jiggle fest that is
Spring Break. It is a veritable flesh

parade. A carnal caravan to... places
where the weather is hot and the women

hotter. So begins our story of Jack and
Diane.

Jack's a frat boy visiting from out of
town, and Diane's a hometown girl whose

local boredom leads her to participate
in the greatest of spring break

traditions, the wet t -shirt contest.

It's down to the final two girls.
There's a brunette with plump double D's

proven to be quite the crowd pleaser.

And sweet Diane, who's giving this co
-ed a run for her money. The competition

is stiff, and so is Jack, especially
when Diane throws him her T -shirt.

When jackets are matching panties, he
knows it's love.

And he watches, captivated, as Diane
turns this into a wet TNA contest.

Hi, how you doing? Congratulations.

You like my jacket?

Diane goes to fetch her clothes, but it
seems Jack has another fetching idea and

invites her outside.

Hooking up is another spring break
tradition, and these two can't wait to

experience that as well.

Poking by a dumpster is not the most
romantic spot, but it's convenient, and

Diane is basically naked from the
contest.

until you put your mouth right there.

Oh, God. Suck on my clit.

Yeah.

Not only is this not the most romantic
spot, it's also not the most private.

Jack keeps plowing away, clueless that
his buddies have stepped outside for a

smoke. When his buddies catch on, they
sneak over to watch Jack treat this

to a wallbanger.

Spring break is off to a killer start.

Jack was expecting Diane to be a one
-night wonder, but after this

he's hooked.

The next night, Jack drags Diane into a
public men's room for some stall sex.

Jack pops her top while Diane checks his
undercarriage.

They both know that stealth is key.

But Diane can't help moaning, so Jack
knows how to shut her up.

Oh, yeah, that's good. Of course, Diane
knows when she gets oral, it's Jack

who's going vocal.

Oh, God.

By the time Jack's ready to take the
plunge, all concern for Quiet is lost.

Diane rides him like a bucking bronco as
they bang away in the stall.

Their rumpty gets interrupted, and
Jack's barely able to muffle the muff

as some guy comes in to take a piss.

Only it seems Piss Boy has a full tank
to empty, and being only a few feet

Jack and Diane struggle to stay quiet.

Piss Boy keeps pissing, and Jack's dying
for this guy to finish his whiz so he

can get back to doing his biz.

Yeah, and shooting his jizz.

Anyway, Shakespeare, piss boy starts
thinking maybe he's not alone.

Our copulating couple has to stifle
their laughter. The last thing they need

for this guy to get pee shy. But no
worries. He finally manages to drain his

vein, then dips up and walks out. What,
he didn't wash his hands?

I know.

Yuck, dude, toilet sex is about as hot
as a bathroom is hygienic. Tell me about

it, man. And Jack's getting a little fed
up with these public displays of

affection. What about her place?

Can't. She lives with her parents.

Jack suggests the park, but Diane gets
all weird.

Seems there's stories of frolicking
couples getting murdered there at night.

Ah, the maniac of the woods.

So what do they do?

Well, they're either really broke or
they really want to get laid. Either

the next night Jack takes Diane to the
park for a little loving under the

Ah, I hope she likes sand in her box.

She brings a bunch of camping gear with
her and they head to the park

campground.

The park is deserted, so they have no
problem finding a private spot to pitch

their tent.

Dude, I'm pitching one right now just
thinking about it.

Anyway, these two have finally found a
peaceful place for pleasure.

Jack's prepared to totally Romeo Diane
tonight, maniac or no maniac.

He peels off her bra.

Taking his time and lays her back on the
sleeping bag.

See, baby?

Yeah.

That's so bad.

Things are going great, but there's a
slight problem. They aren't exactly

Yeah,

that's how you do it.

Strangers approaching in the middle of
the night can only mean...

But Diane keeps grinding away with
reckless abandon.

She's on top of them, and they're nearly
on top of her.

Suddenly, the tent flaps ripped open,
but instead of the maniac, it's a deputy

sheriff. What do we have here?

Jack's spooked, but Diane's relieved.

You guys know it's illegal to have sex
in a public park?

I wouldn't exactly call this an open and
shut case.

Diane's pussy pleads their case, and the
deputy is overwhelmed by her compelling

body of evidence.

Maybe we could work something out.

Now you, come on, out of the tent.

Jack bounces out of the tent, pulling on
his clothes.

He starts to complain to the other cop,
but discovers the town sheriff ain't

interested. Well, well, well, looks like
it's our turn today.

So you know you're in big trouble,
right? Mm -hmm.

So you're going to take care of me?
Yeah.

Jack can't believe Diane is actually
cooperating with the authorities.

Copulating, you mean.

This deputy's scared straight program
involves jamming himself straight into

Diane.

I'm going to bat, girl.

Yes, you have.

Oh, yeah. Oh,

yeah. I feel so good.

This deputy is giving her a lesson about
the slammer.

And it seems they're all getting a
glimpse of life on the inside.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, just like that.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh,

God.

Our sheriff has seen enough, but it's
not the deputy's behavior that makes him

step forward.

Jack can tell this sheriff's only
planning to bust one thing.

Yeah, his own nuts.

Exactly.

This police department has a policy.

The man with the biggest nightstick
takes the final swing.

Only there's a problem.

Daddy!

Oh, not the sheriff's daughter.

Busted.

So did he fuck her?

Dude, you did not just ask me that. I'm
kidding. But obviously that night put an

end to little Diane's wild spurt. Well,
I think it was the deputy's spurt and a

little Diane that troubled the sheriff
more.

Hey, so what about the Maniac of the
Woods?

Apparently those stories were untrue.
The sheriff made them up just to keep

kids out of the park at night.

Ah.

Well, if you like that case of mistaken
identity, then this one's guaranteed to

double your pleasure.

I call it Double Trouble.

It's about twins.

Oh, you're so good to me.

Kelly and Shelly are identical in every
way. They share the same house, the same

hairstyle, the same... Smoking body?

They're not Siamese, jackass. There's
two of them.

Two very hot girls who also share the
same job, dancing in an exotic cabaret.

Ladies and gentlemen, now to entertain
you on our runway of fame, introducing

the fabulous Kelly.

Kelly's a stripper in her prime, and she
gets top dollar for her talent. She

knows how to please the crowd.

and please herself in the process.

But what really makes her happy is those
dollar bills landing on stage when her

dancing is done.

Ladies and gentlemen, a round of
applause for my fabulous Kelly.

And this crowd ain't seen nothing yet.

You are.

Both sisters take the stage. It's time
for everyone to grab their poles.

Yeah, I'll bet, dude.

These two put the art in party, and they
dance together, working the crowd in

tandem.

perform their simulated sex show, the
money just pours in.

Hey, there's nothing like a thriving
family business, is there?

Throbbing is more like it.

It's time to take a bow and show their
appreciation.

Can you say a wow?

Double wow.

We're talking legs for days.

And the crowd just eats them up. They
wish.

They earn cash hand over fist.

But this is just chump change.

The real money comes from lap dancing in
the VIP lounge.

That's where the customers shell out the
large green.

Especially one fat cat who takes a fancy
to Kelly.

He's clutching a sweaty fistful of cash,
and she's hoping to relieve him of some

of that extra weight.

Kelly drops down to her hands and knees
and crawls around his chair, allowing

her to make the big switch. For you see,
Shelly wants in on the action too.

Shelly picks up where Kelly left off and
kicks things up a notch.

And again, they make the switch. But
Kelly doesn't miss a beat. She steps

in and continues the charade.

Dude, they're totally tag teaming this
guy.

You got a problem with that? Hey, I say,
the more the merrier.

Exactly. And once the fat cat figures
out what's going on, it's too late. He's

hooked.

Double the pleasure, double the money,
right?

That's okay. I got plenty, honey.

Pardon my engorgement, but where is the
legend in this? You have no patience, my

friend. Don't you know the finest things
always take time?

So what? These chicks are all about
driving guys nuts and then taking their

money. Tell me something about chicks
that I don't know. Well, they have a

sensitive side.

And for Kelly, that involves her
boyfriend, Lance.

He's the only thing that makes Kelly and
Shelly different.

See, Shelly's happy to play the field,
but when Kelly's not dancing at the

she's giving Lance his own private show
back at her place.

Kelly knows Lance is the man for her.
Her one true love, and she's totally

devoted to making him happy. I'm sure
Lance ain't arguing.

Especially when Kelly cops a feel of his
morning wood.

These two start each day right with a
nutritious breakfast in bed.

Then they take the dog out for a walk.

That's my kind of morning routine.

Kelly swears that she needs her daily
lancing to scrape the horns away so

not tempted to fool around at the club.

But Lance isn't taking any chances.

He likes swinging by the club just to
keep her on her toes.

But there's also a great side benefit.

Sometimes Shelly joins in.

Excellent! A twofer for the double meat
twins.

And both girls give Lance double
treatment.

Of course, Lance has a dilemma.

Two hands, two sisters.

So while one hand fondles Kelly, the
other finds its way to Shelly's fine

And in all this excitement, it's hard to
tell who's who.

But sadly, this is as far as it goes.

Kelly wants Lance all to herself, so she
drags him off to the VIP lounge for

some private time.

It seems a no -touching policy at the
club doesn't apply to boyfriends, and

Lance is taking full advantage.

Oh, God, this is so good.

Look at the Lord.

There you go.

Kelly shoves her honey hole in Lance's
face and he makes like a busy bee.

My pussy.

Just as these two are about to blow,
Sister Shelly pokes her head in for a

peek.

They're having such fun, Kelly is sort
of bummed she couldn't join the party.

Shelly decides to slip away and take
matters into her own hands.

We talking a solo soiree?

You know it, dude.

She finds a private room and makes
herself nice and comfy.

Seems Shelly's got a secret lover of her
own.

And it's of the battery -powered
variety.

She fires it up to iron out the kinks.

And this girl's got some kinks.

Don't get me wrong.

She can definitely take care of herself.

But at times like these, she wishes she
had a man like Lance.