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1
00:00:03,567 --> 00:00:05,667
willie,
big news,
2
00:00:05,734 --> 00:00:07,968
the alfer's
won a contest.
3
00:00:08,033 --> 00:00:10,934
yeah, oh,
let's see.
4
00:00:13,467 --> 00:00:15,734
you won a copy of
"cat lover's monthly"?
5
00:00:15,801 --> 00:00:19,634
kind of a letdown;
no recipes.
6
00:00:19,701 --> 00:00:22,200
how did you
win this?
7
00:00:22,267 --> 00:00:25,467
i entered that publisher's
sweepstakes thing.
8
00:00:25,534 --> 00:00:28,234
i licked all those
magazine stamps,
9
00:00:28,300 --> 00:00:30,100
and stuck them
on my entry.
10
00:00:30,167 --> 00:00:31,834
you sent in...
11
00:00:31,901 --> 00:00:33,000
all...
12
00:00:33,067 --> 00:00:34,267
those stamps?
13
00:00:34,334 --> 00:00:36,767
well, all
except "redbook."
14
00:00:36,834 --> 00:00:39,701
it's still stuck to
the roof of my mouth.
15
00:00:41,367 --> 00:00:44,934
just how many
magazines did you win?
16
00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:46,767
check the
front porch.
17
00:00:52,300 --> 00:00:53,934
oops.
18
00:00:55,334 --> 00:00:59,467
alf, you didn't
win any sweepstakes.
19
00:00:59,534 --> 00:01:03,868
you've subscribed to
hundreds of magazines!
20
00:01:03,934 --> 00:01:08,734
that explains this personal
thank you note from ed mcmahon.
21
00:01:14,300 --> 00:01:18,334
**
22
00:02:02,300 --> 00:02:04,667
here's your
cappuccino.
23
00:02:04,734 --> 00:02:06,634
where's the
grated cheese?
24
00:02:06,701 --> 00:02:08,868
i'll get it.
25
00:02:08,934 --> 00:02:10,934
[ alf ]willie, kate,
26
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:13,534
i have something
to tell you.
27
00:02:13,601 --> 00:02:17,067
this time the ol' alfer's
really won something.
28
00:02:17,133 --> 00:02:20,067
what now?
11 records for a penny?
29
00:02:20,133 --> 00:02:25,100
no. this time the alfer's
won stuff for everybody:
30
00:02:25,167 --> 00:02:27,300
pony rides
for brian,
31
00:02:27,367 --> 00:02:29,601
tennis lessons
for lynn,
32
00:02:29,667 --> 00:02:31,767
dinner and dancing
for you two,
33
00:02:31,834 --> 00:02:35,133
and best of all,
for the ol' alfer,
34
00:02:35,200 --> 00:02:36,901
a toaster.
35
00:02:40,534 --> 00:02:42,100
i guess you
didn't hear me;
36
00:02:42,167 --> 00:02:43,801
a toaster!
37
00:02:43,868 --> 00:02:45,100
we heard
you.
38
00:02:45,167 --> 00:02:48,400
did i mention that
the toaster talks?
39
00:02:48,467 --> 00:02:52,434
oh, alf, this is a
real estate promotion.
40
00:02:52,501 --> 00:02:54,234
a free toaster for
listening to a...
41
00:02:54,300 --> 00:02:57,234
sales pitch about
vacation homes.
42
00:02:57,300 --> 00:02:59,367
you mean,
no pony rides?
43
00:02:59,434 --> 00:03:01,300
there may be
a pony ride,
44
00:03:01,367 --> 00:03:03,968
but there's also
a 7-hour car ride...
45
00:03:04,067 --> 00:03:06,133
to get to
this place.
46
00:03:06,200 --> 00:03:07,667
i'm not driving
7 hours.
47
00:03:07,734 --> 00:03:09,133
sorry, alf.
48
00:03:09,200 --> 00:03:10,667
alfer.
49
00:03:10,734 --> 00:03:13,200
alfer.
50
00:03:13,267 --> 00:03:16,200
[ doorbell ]
51
00:03:16,267 --> 00:03:19,267
they lied
to a child?
52
00:03:22,467 --> 00:03:23,467
hi,
neighbor.
53
00:03:23,534 --> 00:03:24,467
oh, hi.
54
00:03:24,534 --> 00:03:27,434
got you
a present.
55
00:03:27,501 --> 00:03:29,667
thanks, won't
you come in?
56
00:03:29,734 --> 00:03:32,968
i noticed your garbage cans
have been flowing over.
57
00:03:33,033 --> 00:03:37,367
oh, we've been throwing
out a lot of magazines.
58
00:03:37,434 --> 00:03:42,534
these insert things were
all over your porch and lawn.
59
00:03:42,601 --> 00:03:44,634
i kept the
perfume samples.
60
00:03:44,701 --> 00:03:46,601
the wife's birthday's
next week.
61
00:03:46,667 --> 00:03:49,200
she'll
be touched.
62
00:03:49,267 --> 00:03:50,434
as am i.
63
00:03:50,501 --> 00:03:55,501
hey, you got a letter
from rancho estates, too.
64
00:03:55,567 --> 00:03:58,834
yeah, the
toaster people.
65
00:03:58,901 --> 00:04:03,000
raquel and me go to these
things all the time.
66
00:04:03,067 --> 00:04:05,067
hey, you want to
go together?
67
00:04:05,133 --> 00:04:06,000
together?
68
00:04:06,067 --> 00:04:08,467
no, we're
not interested.
69
00:04:08,534 --> 00:04:10,200
because
of me?
70
00:04:10,267 --> 00:04:11,501
no, i didn't
mean that.
71
00:04:11,567 --> 00:04:16,367
we'd love to spend
a weekend with you folks.
72
00:04:16,434 --> 00:04:19,367
we're not interested
in a 7-hour drive.
73
00:04:19,434 --> 00:04:21,133
you can fly
there in 1 hour.
74
00:04:21,200 --> 00:04:23,234
sure, but who
can afford it?
75
00:04:23,300 --> 00:04:25,067
i'll fly you
there for nothing.
76
00:04:25,133 --> 00:04:28,067
my friend lets me borrow
his plane on weekends.
77
00:04:28,133 --> 00:04:30,501
you're
a pilot?
78
00:04:30,567 --> 00:04:32,834
yeah, i flew
in korea.
79
00:04:32,901 --> 00:04:36,367
over inchon, i took some
commie flak in my ribs.
80
00:04:36,434 --> 00:04:37,267
you want to
see the scar?
81
00:04:37,334 --> 00:04:40,100
no, please--
82
00:04:40,167 --> 00:04:41,534
how ya doing,
kate?
83
00:04:41,601 --> 00:04:43,100
trevor.
84
00:04:43,167 --> 00:04:46,067
then it's
settled.
85
00:04:46,133 --> 00:04:48,000
see you friday
night after work...
86
00:04:48,067 --> 00:04:49,834
at the
airport.
87
00:04:49,901 --> 00:04:52,567
what's settled?
what airport?
88
00:04:52,634 --> 00:04:55,234
thanks again for the
garbage can, trevor.
89
00:04:55,300 --> 00:04:56,667
what
garbage can?
90
00:04:56,734 --> 00:05:00,000
this garbage can.
91
00:05:00,067 --> 00:05:03,000
trevor wants to fly us
to rancho estates.
92
00:05:03,067 --> 00:05:05,968
way to go,
mister "o"!
93
00:05:06,033 --> 00:05:08,434
we don't have to
see mr. ochmonek...
94
00:05:08,501 --> 00:05:10,501
in a bathing
suit, do we?
95
00:05:10,567 --> 00:05:12,701
no, because
we're not going.
96
00:05:12,767 --> 00:05:15,601
why?
it'll be fun.
97
00:05:15,667 --> 00:05:17,801
a weekend with
the ochmoneks?
98
00:05:17,868 --> 00:05:21,234
it's not as if we have to
share the same bathroom.
99
00:05:21,300 --> 00:05:21,801
do we?
100
00:05:21,868 --> 00:05:22,667
no.
101
00:05:22,734 --> 00:05:25,534
let's go,
anyway.
102
00:05:25,601 --> 00:05:29,267
even if you could get me
in a plane with trevor,
103
00:05:29,334 --> 00:05:32,267
we still have the problem
of leaving alf alone.
104
00:05:32,334 --> 00:05:36,033
maybe that's not
that big a problem.
105
00:05:36,100 --> 00:05:39,033
alf has gone 6 months
without starting a fire.
106
00:05:39,100 --> 00:05:40,300
right, dad.
107
00:05:40,367 --> 00:05:41,767
please?
108
00:05:41,834 --> 00:05:46,367
gee, a vacation
would be nice.
109
00:05:46,434 --> 00:05:47,667
okay,
let's go.
110
00:05:47,734 --> 00:05:49,367
oh, great!
111
00:05:49,434 --> 00:05:52,267
i'm ready.
112
00:05:55,868 --> 00:05:59,834
uh-oh, am i
going alone?
113
00:05:59,901 --> 00:06:03,701
no, alf, we're
going alone.
114
00:06:11,667 --> 00:06:14,234
this is captain ochmonek
speaking.
115
00:06:14,300 --> 00:06:16,100
for those
with cameras,
116
00:06:16,167 --> 00:06:18,901
on your left is the
tujunga toxic waste dump.
117
00:06:18,968 --> 00:06:21,033
i'll fly lower so you
can get a better view.
118
00:06:21,100 --> 00:06:25,000
no, we can see
it fine from here.
119
00:06:25,067 --> 00:06:26,701
i sure get
a kick out of...
120
00:06:26,767 --> 00:06:28,734
flying passengers
for a change,
121
00:06:28,801 --> 00:06:30,834
instead of
just cargo.
122
00:06:30,901 --> 00:06:33,534
where's that
smell coming from?
123
00:06:33,601 --> 00:06:36,934
from the cargo hold
where the pigs are.
124
00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:38,801
oh, daddy, i
feel so sick.
125
00:06:38,868 --> 00:06:43,400
why do we have to fly
facing backwards, anyway?
126
00:06:43,467 --> 00:06:45,467
i guess so we can keep
our eye on the pigs.
127
00:06:51,334 --> 00:06:53,033
there you go.
128
00:06:54,367 --> 00:06:57,634
willie, this place
is nice. i'm surprised.
129
00:06:57,701 --> 00:06:59,801
me, too. the
hotel is great.
130
00:06:59,868 --> 00:07:02,601
i keep looking
for the catch.
131
00:07:02,667 --> 00:07:04,701
hello, you must
be the tanners.
132
00:07:04,767 --> 00:07:06,234
i'm bill loman,
133
00:07:06,300 --> 00:07:08,167
sales manager
for rancho estates.
134
00:07:08,234 --> 00:07:09,434
i was
expecting you.
135
00:07:09,501 --> 00:07:11,367
no, mr. tanner, i think
you were expecting...
136
00:07:11,434 --> 00:07:12,534
the hard sell.
137
00:07:12,601 --> 00:07:14,634
there's no need
to worry about that.
138
00:07:14,701 --> 00:07:15,934
good.
139
00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:17,968
after you've seen
this slide show,
140
00:07:18,033 --> 00:07:20,934
you are going to be begging
me to sell you a home.
141
00:07:21,000 --> 00:07:22,534
[ recorded voice ]buenos d�as!
142
00:07:22,601 --> 00:07:24,334
[ recorded voice ]that means good day.
143
00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:26,367
[ recorded voice ]and at rancho estates,
144
00:07:26,434 --> 00:07:28,334
[ recorded voice ]every day is a good day.
145
00:07:28,400 --> 00:07:30,234
would it
be okay...
146
00:07:30,300 --> 00:07:32,133
if we looked
at this later?
147
00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:33,801
when later?
148
00:07:33,868 --> 00:07:35,200
much later.
149
00:07:35,267 --> 00:07:38,667
absolutely
no problem.
150
00:07:38,734 --> 00:07:40,400
you folks should
enjoy some tennis,
151
00:07:40,467 --> 00:07:42,200
some swimming
and some fishing.
152
00:07:42,267 --> 00:07:43,367
if you need me,
153
00:07:43,434 --> 00:07:46,801
i'll be following
you in a golf cart.
154
00:07:49,868 --> 00:07:52,667
you know, we expected
a sales pitch.
155
00:07:52,734 --> 00:07:54,200
that's no
reason why...
156
00:07:54,267 --> 00:07:56,067
we can't enjoy
ourselves.
157
00:07:56,133 --> 00:07:57,133
alf!
158
00:07:57,200 --> 00:07:59,434
buenos d�as!
159
00:08:08,100 --> 00:08:09,834
let's clear
this up.
160
00:08:09,901 --> 00:08:11,934
are you, or
are you not...
161
00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:13,200
happy to
see me?
162
00:08:13,267 --> 00:08:15,234
i'm happy,
alf.
163
00:08:15,300 --> 00:08:16,734
are those
chocolates?
164
00:08:16,801 --> 00:08:19,133
how did you
get here?
165
00:08:19,200 --> 00:08:20,601
i stowed away...
166
00:08:20,667 --> 00:08:22,200
in kate's
suitcase.
167
00:08:22,267 --> 00:08:23,334
oh, no.
168
00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:26,033
now i'll have your hair
all over my clothes.
169
00:08:26,100 --> 00:08:28,267
take it easy.
170
00:08:28,334 --> 00:08:29,601
your clothes are
hair free and...
171
00:08:29,667 --> 00:08:33,033
hanging neatly in
the closet back home.
172
00:08:33,100 --> 00:08:35,234
what am i supposed
to wear here?
173
00:08:35,300 --> 00:08:38,300
well, i love what
you've got on now;
174
00:08:38,367 --> 00:08:40,667
perfect for
every occasion.
175
00:08:42,167 --> 00:08:46,033
alf, we trusted you to
stay out of trouble.
176
00:08:46,100 --> 00:08:48,868
i trusted you to
get my toaster,
177
00:08:48,934 --> 00:08:50,834
but i don't see
it anywhere;
178
00:08:50,901 --> 00:08:53,367
let alone,
hear it.
179
00:08:54,701 --> 00:08:57,501
but the fact is,
i felt neglected.
180
00:08:57,567 --> 00:09:01,834
i'm a member of this
family, too, you know.
181
00:09:01,901 --> 00:09:05,367
i just wanted to be with
the people i love,
182
00:09:05,434 --> 00:09:07,934
and get
that toaster.
183
00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:09,667
[ knocking at door ]
184
00:09:09,734 --> 00:09:11,200
[ trevor ] hey, tanner, guess what?
185
00:09:11,267 --> 00:09:13,133
[ trevor ]we have adjoining rooms.
186
00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:14,534
[ trevor ] hey, open up.
187
00:09:14,601 --> 00:09:16,834
can't we shake
this guy?
188
00:09:16,901 --> 00:09:18,767
brian, hide alf
in the bedroom.
189
00:09:18,834 --> 00:09:19,834
all right,
190
00:09:19,901 --> 00:09:23,934
but don't start that
slide show without me.
191
00:09:36,734 --> 00:09:37,501
[ door bangs ]
192
00:09:39,501 --> 00:09:41,634
dad, what are you
doing up so early?
193
00:09:41,701 --> 00:09:44,601
i'm sorry.
194
00:09:44,667 --> 00:09:46,534
i never got
to sleep.
195
00:09:46,601 --> 00:09:48,067
i spent the whole
night listening to...
196
00:09:48,133 --> 00:09:50,667
the ochmoneks
snore.
197
00:09:50,734 --> 00:09:53,200
they both
snore?
198
00:09:53,267 --> 00:09:56,267
in a pattern...
199
00:09:56,334 --> 00:09:59,634
like a
conversation.
200
00:09:59,701 --> 00:10:00,901
didn't you
hear it?
201
00:10:00,968 --> 00:10:04,467
i just thought it
was the ice machine.
202
00:10:06,100 --> 00:10:07,868
alf?
203
00:10:07,934 --> 00:10:08,868
where's alf?
204
00:10:08,934 --> 00:10:10,367
i thought he
was in with you.
205
00:10:10,434 --> 00:10:11,334
kate!
206
00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:12,868
what's wrong?
207
00:10:12,934 --> 00:10:14,834
i can't
find alf.
208
00:10:17,434 --> 00:10:20,234
i'm right here.
209
00:10:20,300 --> 00:10:23,133
willie,
what's wrong?
210
00:10:23,200 --> 00:10:26,634
where
were you?
out catching
catfish.
211
00:10:26,701 --> 00:10:27,701
somebody could
have seen you.
212
00:10:27,767 --> 00:10:29,567
no way!
213
00:10:29,634 --> 00:10:31,901
this place is a
morgue before dawn.
214
00:10:31,968 --> 00:10:34,200
i wanted to surprise
you guys by...
215
00:10:34,267 --> 00:10:37,901
serving catfish
in bed.
216
00:10:37,968 --> 00:10:39,300
[ knocking at door ]
217
00:10:39,367 --> 00:10:41,901
[ trevor ] hey, tanner, rise and shine.
218
00:10:41,968 --> 00:10:42,934
bedroom.
219
00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:45,000
bathroom. gotta
clean the fish.
220
00:10:45,067 --> 00:10:47,267
come on, b.
221
00:10:49,901 --> 00:10:51,167
oh, morning,
trevor.
222
00:10:51,234 --> 00:10:52,801
good, you're
already up.
223
00:10:52,868 --> 00:10:55,801
[ alf ]hey, we'vegot a bidet!
224
00:10:57,934 --> 00:10:59,367
it's brian.
225
00:10:59,434 --> 00:11:01,868
in the morning his
voice is a lot lower.
226
00:11:01,934 --> 00:11:04,434
[ electric shaver ]
sounds like he's shaving.
227
00:11:04,501 --> 00:11:05,601
ah, yeah,
228
00:11:07,033 --> 00:11:09,968
i won't allow him
to have a mustache.
229
00:11:10,033 --> 00:11:11,834
that's good.
230
00:11:11,901 --> 00:11:14,200
you've got to
take a stand.
231
00:11:14,267 --> 00:11:15,734
listen, since
we're up already,
232
00:11:15,801 --> 00:11:17,901
why not go for
a pony ride?
233
00:11:17,968 --> 00:11:20,100
no, thanks,
trevor.
234
00:11:20,167 --> 00:11:22,400
we're just going
to stay here.
235
00:11:22,467 --> 00:11:24,133
yes, it's such
a great room,
236
00:11:24,200 --> 00:11:27,267
we don't want to
waste it by going out.
237
00:11:28,267 --> 00:11:29,634
but you
gotta go out.
238
00:11:29,701 --> 00:11:31,801
you gotta go to the
big sales presentation.
239
00:11:31,868 --> 00:11:34,734
it's mandatory
for everybody.
240
00:11:34,801 --> 00:11:36,033
all of
us?
241
00:11:36,100 --> 00:11:37,467
away from
this room?
242
00:11:37,534 --> 00:11:38,701
at the
same time?
243
00:11:40,267 --> 00:11:42,367
yeah, what the
heck, get crazy.
244
00:11:44,367 --> 00:11:46,434
[ door closes ]
245
00:11:47,901 --> 00:11:50,133
alf, he's
gone.
246
00:11:50,200 --> 00:11:53,000
[ brian ]he's busyscaling catfish.
247
00:11:53,067 --> 00:11:55,267
catfish don't
have scales.
248
00:11:55,334 --> 00:11:58,300
then i won't be needing
your shaver anymore.
249
00:11:59,868 --> 00:12:01,400
neither
will i.
250
00:12:09,868 --> 00:12:11,968
nice dress,
mom.
251
00:12:12,033 --> 00:12:14,834
yeah, kate, you look
real sexy in that.
252
00:12:14,901 --> 00:12:19,267
well, anyone would
look good in this.
253
00:12:19,334 --> 00:12:20,968
trevor,
254
00:12:21,033 --> 00:12:24,367
you're not supposed
to eat shellfish.
255
00:12:24,434 --> 00:12:25,667
you'll have an
allergic reaction.
256
00:12:25,734 --> 00:12:28,133
it's safer than the mexican
food tanner's eating.
257
00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:29,667
huh, tanner?
258
00:12:29,734 --> 00:12:32,234
what?
oh,
259
00:12:32,300 --> 00:12:34,634
i'm sorry. i was
worrying about...
260
00:12:34,701 --> 00:12:36,934
whether
our room...
261
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:38,100
would be
all right,
262
00:12:38,167 --> 00:12:40,267
all alone.
263
00:12:42,868 --> 00:12:44,901
our room will
be fine, dad.
264
00:12:44,968 --> 00:12:47,501
it has a toaster
to keep it company.
265
00:12:52,767 --> 00:12:53,467
[ talking toaster ]
toast.
266
00:12:53,534 --> 00:12:55,701
hah! hah!
267
00:12:55,767 --> 00:12:58,167
[ toaster ]
toast.
268
00:12:58,234 --> 00:13:00,634
[ toaster ]
toast.
269
00:13:00,701 --> 00:13:03,033
[ toaster ]
toast down.
270
00:13:06,234 --> 00:13:07,801
hello,
room service,
271
00:13:07,868 --> 00:13:12,400
send another bag of
bread to room 13.
272
00:13:12,467 --> 00:13:14,501
yeah, leave it outside
the door again.
273
00:13:14,567 --> 00:13:15,300
[ toaster ]
toasting.
274
00:13:15,367 --> 00:13:17,534
quiet, i'm
on the phone.
275
00:13:17,601 --> 00:13:21,400
oh, hey, and bring
some tartar sauce.
276
00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:23,634
thanks.
277
00:13:23,701 --> 00:13:25,200
now let's see
what you can do...
278
00:13:25,267 --> 00:13:26,901
with catfish.
279
00:13:26,968 --> 00:13:28,534
oh, hot!
280
00:13:29,667 --> 00:13:34,200
your daughter is a
terrific tennis player.
281
00:13:34,267 --> 00:13:37,067
honey, if you lived up here
you could play every day.
282
00:13:37,133 --> 00:13:38,767
yeah.
283
00:13:38,834 --> 00:13:40,100
why don't you
tell your dad...
284
00:13:40,167 --> 00:13:41,801
how much you'd
like to live here.
285
00:13:41,868 --> 00:13:42,634
no.
286
00:13:42,701 --> 00:13:44,267
go on,
tell him.
no!
287
00:13:44,334 --> 00:13:45,133
tell him!
no!
288
00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:46,234
mr. loman--
289
00:13:46,300 --> 00:13:47,801
settle down, folks,
290
00:13:47,868 --> 00:13:49,334
we'll begin the sales
presentation...
291
00:13:49,400 --> 00:13:51,067
in just
a minute.
292
00:13:51,133 --> 00:13:52,801
that's why
we're here, right?
293
00:13:56,000 --> 00:13:57,601
of course, there
are some people who...
294
00:13:57,667 --> 00:14:01,100
keep coming back for the
free room and shellfish.
295
00:14:03,267 --> 00:14:05,400
last chance
for seconds.
296
00:14:05,467 --> 00:14:06,501
trevor,
297
00:14:06,567 --> 00:14:08,767
you said you were only
going back for salad.
298
00:14:08,834 --> 00:14:12,834
i did. it's
underneath the shrimp.
299
00:14:12,901 --> 00:14:15,000
hey, tanner, you
didn't eat a thing.
300
00:14:16,601 --> 00:14:18,234
you still worried
about your room?
301
00:14:18,300 --> 00:14:19,701
no.
302
00:14:24,167 --> 00:14:26,334
willie,
was that--
303
00:14:28,801 --> 00:14:30,601
yes,
it was!
304
00:14:33,100 --> 00:14:35,200
ohhhhhhhhhh!
305
00:14:35,267 --> 00:14:38,334
i warned him about
that mexican food.
306
00:14:46,100 --> 00:14:47,400
i tell you,
tanner,
307
00:14:47,467 --> 00:14:50,834
i thought only rock stars
got kicked out of hotels.
308
00:14:50,901 --> 00:14:53,067
i can't imagine
what caused...
309
00:14:53,133 --> 00:14:54,367
that toaster to
short circuit,
310
00:14:54,434 --> 00:14:56,534
but i'm going
to find out.
311
00:14:56,601 --> 00:14:59,467
it sure stunk
up the place.
312
00:14:59,534 --> 00:15:01,634
it smelled of burned fish
all the way to the lobby.
313
00:15:03,701 --> 00:15:05,133
by the way,
314
00:15:05,200 --> 00:15:08,000
how's that smell back
in the cargo section?
315
00:15:09,868 --> 00:15:12,634
i, for one,
miss the pigs.
316
00:15:12,701 --> 00:15:14,734
i'm sorry.
317
00:15:14,801 --> 00:15:17,067
i meant to hose
down the jackals.
318
00:15:17,133 --> 00:15:18,434
hey, raquel,
319
00:15:18,501 --> 00:15:20,767
i feel a
little woozy.
320
00:15:20,834 --> 00:15:22,133
get me a bromo,
will ya?
321
00:15:22,200 --> 00:15:24,534
i warned you about
that shellfish, trevor.
322
00:15:24,601 --> 00:15:26,467
just get it,
all right?
323
00:15:26,534 --> 00:15:28,767
i'll get it,
in a second.
324
00:15:28,834 --> 00:15:32,467
i have to put
ointment on my shoulders.
325
00:15:32,534 --> 00:15:36,467
that hotel ought to warn
their guests about the sun.
326
00:15:41,968 --> 00:15:43,067
quite possibly,
327
00:15:43,133 --> 00:15:45,067
the worst
weekend...
328
00:15:45,133 --> 00:15:47,234
of our
entire lives.
329
00:15:47,300 --> 00:15:49,834
you haven't stopped
complaining...
330
00:15:49,901 --> 00:15:52,300
since i burned
down that room.
331
00:15:55,067 --> 00:15:57,400
you, back with
the jackals!
332
00:15:57,467 --> 00:15:58,968
they're hyenas,
333
00:15:59,033 --> 00:16:00,567
and i don't
like them.
334
00:16:00,634 --> 00:16:01,767
they're
jackals.
335
00:16:01,834 --> 00:16:04,467
then, why are they
laughing at me?
336
00:16:09,767 --> 00:16:11,801
lieutenant mcintosh,
337
00:16:11,868 --> 00:16:13,634
give me the
coordinates.
338
00:16:13,701 --> 00:16:15,534
we're almost over
enemy territory.
339
00:16:15,601 --> 00:16:17,634
what enemy
territory?
340
00:16:17,701 --> 00:16:19,634
what enemy
territory?
341
00:16:19,701 --> 00:16:21,033
what do you
think that is?
342
00:16:21,100 --> 00:16:22,534
the mississippi river?
343
00:16:22,601 --> 00:16:24,701
those are the
bridges of toko ri.
344
00:16:25,901 --> 00:16:27,033
trevor!
345
00:16:28,133 --> 00:16:30,234
trevor!
346
00:16:30,300 --> 00:16:31,267
snap out of
it, trevor.
347
00:16:31,334 --> 00:16:32,834
the war
is over.
348
00:16:32,901 --> 00:16:35,567
boy, i did overdo
the shellfish.
349
00:16:35,634 --> 00:16:37,033
willie,
what's wrong?
350
00:16:37,100 --> 00:16:38,133
i'm not
sure.
351
00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:40,667
trevor, how serious
is this allergy?
352
00:16:40,734 --> 00:16:41,767
it's nothing.
353
00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:45,000
listen, would you
switch on the auto pilot.
354
00:16:45,067 --> 00:16:45,801
where is it?
355
00:16:45,868 --> 00:16:49,434
it's right
down there.
356
00:16:49,501 --> 00:16:50,601
thanks.
357
00:16:50,667 --> 00:16:52,734
i'm going
to get up...
358
00:16:52,801 --> 00:16:54,901
and move
around a little,
359
00:16:54,968 --> 00:16:57,000
stretch for
a minute...
360
00:16:57,067 --> 00:16:59,400
so i don't
pass out.
361
00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:02,000
ah! oh!
362
00:17:02,067 --> 00:17:03,200
trevor!
363
00:17:03,267 --> 00:17:05,033
trevor,
trevor!
364
00:17:05,100 --> 00:17:07,200
trevor,
say something.
365
00:17:07,267 --> 00:17:10,033
oh, good,
the u.s.o.
366
00:17:10,100 --> 00:17:11,801
is he
okay?
367
00:17:11,868 --> 00:17:13,200
my gosh, what are
we going to do?
368
00:17:13,267 --> 00:17:14,300
who's going to
fly the plane?
369
00:17:14,367 --> 00:17:15,434
dad, you
fly it.
370
00:17:15,501 --> 00:17:16,467
relax everybody.
371
00:17:16,534 --> 00:17:19,801
nobody is going
to fly this plane.
372
00:17:19,868 --> 00:17:21,167
ah, dad--
373
00:17:23,033 --> 00:17:24,601
i'll fly it.
374
00:17:24,667 --> 00:17:25,801
you--
375
00:17:25,868 --> 00:17:27,033
we have
an emergency.
376
00:17:27,100 --> 00:17:29,267
i'm the
logical choice.
377
00:17:29,334 --> 00:17:31,434
oh, by the way,
you were right.
378
00:17:31,501 --> 00:17:32,834
they are
not hyenas,
379
00:17:32,901 --> 00:17:34,501
but they
are laughing.
380
00:17:37,400 --> 00:17:38,934
alf can fly
a plane?
381
00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:42,534
oh, he can't even
work the toaster.
382
00:17:42,601 --> 00:17:44,901
well, he did
fly a spaceship.
383
00:17:44,968 --> 00:17:49,634
yeah, how different
can it be?
384
00:17:49,701 --> 00:17:51,100
what does
this do?
385
00:17:51,167 --> 00:17:54,100
[ engine roars ]
386
00:17:54,167 --> 00:17:56,968
i see.
387
00:17:57,033 --> 00:18:00,501
[ raquel ]trevor, stopfooling around.
388
00:18:00,567 --> 00:18:01,868
oh, my gosh,
raquel!
389
00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:05,400
[ raquel ]this door is stuck.
390
00:18:05,467 --> 00:18:07,634
[ raquel ]somebody help me.
391
00:18:07,701 --> 00:18:09,868
oh, oh, she'll
see alf.
392
00:18:09,934 --> 00:18:11,901
help me block
the door.
393
00:18:11,968 --> 00:18:13,701
help is on the
way, raquel.
394
00:18:13,767 --> 00:18:15,601
brian, sit down and
fasten your seat belt.
395
00:18:15,667 --> 00:18:17,467
[ raquel ]what's blockingthe door?
396
00:18:17,534 --> 00:18:18,834
um,
397
00:18:18,901 --> 00:18:20,434
a hyena.
398
00:18:20,501 --> 00:18:22,067
did he figure
it out?
399
00:18:22,133 --> 00:18:23,968
can you
fly it?
400
00:18:24,033 --> 00:18:25,234
i think so.
401
00:18:25,300 --> 00:18:28,300
i need to see
an owner's manual.
402
00:18:28,367 --> 00:18:30,534
there's not
an owner's manual.
403
00:18:30,601 --> 00:18:32,701
then i can't
fly it.
404
00:18:32,767 --> 00:18:34,667
the laws of
aerodynamics are...
405
00:18:34,734 --> 00:18:37,467
the same everywhere
in the universe.
406
00:18:37,534 --> 00:18:40,834
yeah,
that's right.
407
00:18:40,901 --> 00:18:43,834
what are they?
408
00:18:43,901 --> 00:18:46,267
we're headed straight
for that mountain.
409
00:18:46,334 --> 00:18:48,200
alf, do something!
quick!
410
00:18:48,267 --> 00:18:49,634
all right,
all right!
411
00:18:49,701 --> 00:18:54,267
easy, easy,
up, up, up...
412
00:18:54,334 --> 00:18:55,901
and over.
413
00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:58,033
yeah!
414
00:18:58,100 --> 00:19:00,200
this flying's
a piece of cake.
415
00:19:00,267 --> 00:19:03,334
a piece of cake? that
was a piece of luck.
416
00:19:03,400 --> 00:19:07,267
luck? ha!
check this out.
417
00:19:07,334 --> 00:19:08,934
oops!
418
00:19:10,467 --> 00:19:13,701
ha, i gotta hand
it to you, tanner.
419
00:19:13,767 --> 00:19:16,100
you did a great job
bringing in that plane.
420
00:19:16,167 --> 00:19:18,000
but the
next time,
421
00:19:18,067 --> 00:19:19,367
you might mention
to the airport...
422
00:19:19,434 --> 00:19:21,234
that you
plan to land.
423
00:19:22,968 --> 00:19:24,501
i'll keep
that in mind.
424
00:19:24,567 --> 00:19:26,667
thank you so much
for the dress.
425
00:19:26,734 --> 00:19:29,667
i don't know what i would
have done without it.
426
00:19:29,734 --> 00:19:31,434
what a lovely
weekend.
427
00:19:31,501 --> 00:19:33,200
we must do it
again, sometime.
428
00:19:33,267 --> 00:19:36,167
okay. but only if
we get the jackals.
429
00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:43,501
come on,
baby,
430
00:19:43,567 --> 00:19:45,734
speak to the
ol' alfer.
431
00:19:47,534 --> 00:19:48,434
[ alf ]are they gone?
432
00:19:48,501 --> 00:19:49,667
yes.
433
00:19:49,734 --> 00:19:51,033
oh, good.
434
00:19:51,100 --> 00:19:53,033
then we can pick
up where we left off.
435
00:19:53,100 --> 00:19:54,734
i believe you were
thanking me...
436
00:19:54,801 --> 00:19:56,968
for saving
your lives.
437
00:19:57,033 --> 00:19:59,968
no, i believe we had
already thanked you...
438
00:20:00,033 --> 00:20:01,334
several times.
439
00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:03,534
well, you can
thank me again.
440
00:20:03,601 --> 00:20:05,634
no.
441
00:20:05,701 --> 00:20:07,000
please.
442
00:20:07,067 --> 00:20:07,801
all right,
443
00:20:07,868 --> 00:20:11,467
thank you, alf,
444
00:20:11,534 --> 00:20:13,534
we never could have made
it back without you.
445
00:20:13,601 --> 00:20:15,334
you're the best alien
that any family--
446
00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:17,300
[ toaster ]
toast up!
447
00:20:17,367 --> 00:20:20,467
hold that thought,
will you, willie?
448
00:20:20,534 --> 00:20:21,801
my catfish
are ready.
449
00:20:41,767 --> 00:20:44,634
closed captioned by
captions, inc., los angeles
450
00:20:56,734 --> 00:20:58,501
captions copyrighted
by alien productions.
all rights reserved.
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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