Original subtitles

Yeah,

so my name's Parker, and I'm here because I'm single and looking for a

girlfriend.

I've tried the usual ways of finding a girl, but it doesn't seem to work yet.

That's the reason why I'm here.

Basically, I'm supposed to go on a date with Sarah, but...

Before I can get there, I have to go on a date with her mom, Miss Morgan.

And we'll see how that goes. If it's anything like the last date, then it

be a good day.

My name is Millie Morgan.

I'm 45 years old, and I'm here to find someone sweet and kind to date my

daughter. If I could pick out my ideal guy for Sarah, I'd have to pick someone

who's very similar to a younger version of my husband. I feel like that type of

man would really be able to provide for her. We were actually at a drum circle

by the beach, and, you know, he was leading the chant, and...

I just was smitten the way that the stars were sparkling in his eyes in the

moon. I just knew that the stars had crossed, and I had finally met my

Well, hopefully, Parker is exactly who you're looking for. Are you ready to

him? I think so.

Awesome. All right, come with me.

Let's go.

Hi. It's such a pleasure to meet you.

I'm Parker, likewise.

Oh, my God.

I can feel the good energy vibrating off of your aura.

I really want a guy with good vibes to date my daughter.

Yeah, I mean, I'd like to say I'm pretty good vibes. Pretty chill.

That's great.

So, I was thinking for our date, we could focus on self -care.

I think it's so vital to Norris, not only the body, but also the spirit.

Yeah, okay. Sounds cool.

Amazing. So, I was thinking we'd start with a palm reading, and then we'd

that up with a hot stone massage so that we can realign your energy.

Sounds great.

Let's go.

Okay, yeah. Come have a seat.

Oh, wow.

I can see that you have a really impressive love line.

Oh. And you see the spacing between your fingers?

Mm -hmm. That means that you're both driven and passionate, which is

That's really important to my daughter. You know, she's really passionate about

art, painting.

I'm envisioning the aura of our date as, like, this deep purple hue, you know,

saturated with empathy and deep respect. So I think we're off to a great start.

I can see that you have a very calming energy about you.

That's wonderful.

Yeah.

So, how about we begin the massage now?

Yeah, sure.

Right here?

I'm going to need you to go ahead and take off your shirt.

I'm going to take mine off, too.

You are?

Yeah. It's perfectly natural.

It'll help us realign our energies better.

Okay.

That man clearly lives a very healthy and active lifestyle.

I actually, I was a little embarrassed, but I kind of wanted to ask him if I

could borrow his abs to do my washing later.

How's that pressure? Is that good?

Yeah, it was good.

Oh, wow.

Your muscles are quite tight.

You carry a lot of tension in your shoulders.

I'll work this out together.

You might have some stagnant energy stored at the base of your spine.

Is that bad?

I think we can't work out together.

Okay.

Okay, so for the next part of the massage, I'm going to need you to take

pants off.

Underwear, too.

Are you sure?

Oh, yes.

It's perfectly normal.

There's nothing to be embarrassed of.

Being naked is beautiful.

Okay. Yeah.

We help you.

Thank you.

Too hot?

No, no, no. It's different.

Well, I would have definitely not expected a hot stone on a hot day.

It's a lot hotter than I would expect it to be, so...

Start a more traditional approach.

Then her hands traveled upwards a bit and started grazing my balls.

Didn't really know where she wanted to take this, but I started getting hard

I was hoping she wouldn't notice.

Then I also kind of wanted her to notice to see where it would go.

You know, it was the time of the massage where he's supposed to turn over, and I

wasn't sure if he was going to, but I really, really wanted him to.

And then when I saw him turn around and his giant cock was just staring me in

the face,

Hey, I was shocked.

What an understatement.

Wow.

That was quite an impressive call.

Thank you.

I was very surprised how quickly it escalated, especially because we were

outside.

Any of the neighbors could have looked over the wall and seen us.

Yeah, I knew we were going to fuck.

Isn't the date over, though?

Oh, no.

I need to reset your sexual energy immediately.

We're going to fuck.

What kind of mother would I be if I passed along a man of low vibrational

to my daughter?

Of course I had to test him out first. I have to make sure that his chakras are

aligned, that he doesn't have a low root vibrational energy.

That could just ruin all her shadow work that she's been working on.

Okay.

Do we want to go inside, maybe?

Yeah.

Come with me.

I guess we're doing this again.

Thank you.

Oh.

I like your energy.

Oh, she's fucking amazing.

Can

you

rub your fucking face?

If you make me come, you might realize my sacral chakra.

fuck gimme oh fuck

Yeah.

Much as I like your lifestyle, and I appreciate the massage and the palm

reading, I just... I don't think it's for me.

I don't think I'm gonna date Sarah.

Alright. I understand.

I mean, our lifestyle's not for everyone, but... I didn't tell you that

got a pretty short lifeline, so... In the end, it's your loss.

Wait.

What do you mean I have a short lifeline?

Should I be worried about that?