Original subtitles

That place is said to be teeming with snakes,

with the most terrifying one being called Crimson Anaconda.

It’s a demon summoned from hell by cannibals.

It’s the largest and most ferocious man-eating anaconda in the world.

The place has been cursed.

Why are you going to that goddamned place?

The journey isn’t an easy one.

When we get this thing done, forget about the 70/30 split.

I want at least 50% of the profit.

Besides me, you won’t find any other guides willing to come here.

But the money you’re offering

is only enough for a one-way trip.

You have to give me some more money

for the back trip.

Is that enough for you?

I hate being ripped off.

You’re right.

The price stays the same.

It’s the pheromone of a female python.

This scent can drive male anacondas crazy.

A mature female anaconda can mate

with over a dozen male anacondas simultaneously.

That’s slutty.

Crimson Anaconda.

So the legend is real.

There is something beneath it.

There are so many of it.

It’s worth the trip.

We’re going to be rich!

We’re going to be rich!

We’re going to be rich!

Hurry up.

Catch as many of them as you can.

Saying something like

I’ll love you

For eternity

Saying something like

-Holy shit. -Holy shit.

The Thai guy.

The Thai guy.

Help me.

Listen to the sound of your bones being crushed.

Enjoy your meal.

After that,

you can get a good sleep.

Crimson Anaconda

Ladies and gentlemen,

the crazy show is about to begin.

Let’s give a nice warm welcome to

a highly intelligent guest from Malaysia, a bear.

It has the mental ability of a ten-year-old child

and can do various difficult moves.

It’s trying to escape.

Well,

the same old trick again.

It won’t be served dinner tonight.

A man as strong as Heracles.

It freaked me out.

Let’s welcome our beautiful and skilled dart-thrower, Ali,

who holds a beautiful title:

the Money Shot.

For the big finale, we have the most riveting show of

“Escape from the Water Dungeon”.

Let’s give our warmest welcome to the escape artist

who embodies both beauty and intelligence,

Gong Lanlan.

She has to escape from these handcuffs within the time limit.

Should she fail, she will be suffocated.

There is a snake over there!

Why is there a snake here?

Come on, drive it away.

The snake falls into the water tank.

It's too dangerous.

Help.

Help.

She won’t make it.

Hey.

What’s going on?

That brings us to the end of tonight’s show.

Thank you for watching.

Thank you.

You liar!

You’ve been fooling us around.

None of these is real.

This bear is played by a dog.

Who are you calling a dog?

-You and your whole family are dogs. -Come on.

Gentleman. My apologies. My apologies.

There must be some mistake.

She is so gowned up

and you call that a naked escape?

Hey.

-Let go of me. -Gong Lanlan, stop that.

Do you want to be fired?

My contract has expired.

Today is my final performance.

I no longer need to tolerate people like him.

You bunch of charlatans,

-how dare you be so arrogant? -That’s right.

Do you think it’s okay to fool the audience?

-Give our money back. -Take off your cloth

or give our money back.

Refund! Refund! Refund!

You’ll get the refund. I don’t want your money.

-What are you talking about? -I still want to get paid.

Maybe she doesn’t want to make money.

But we still want.

Happy now?

That’s right.

Now, let me tell you if her boobs are real.

All right, all right.

Hey.

Do you have any idea

how much money I lost tonight because of you?

We’ve been working for nothing tonight.

You were asking for it.

Do you honestly think of yourself as a super star?

People bought the tickets only for your sexy body.

Why are you staring at me?

You two losers.

I’m gonna dock your pay for our losses tonight.

That’s okay, as long as you pay us first.

Yeah, pay us first.

With performances like yours, you’re lucky I’m not asking for money from you.

I’ve long been fed up with this job.

Sawatdee-ka.

Guys,

long time no see.

Who are you?

Baliang?

Nice doing businesses with you,

Mr. Song.

You’re the real boss now.

Thanks, Mr. Jin.

Guys, adieu.

Wow,

Baliang,

it seems you’ve been doing well

in the past two years.

Since you left, I’ve been playing the role of a beast all alone.

Watch it.

Baliang,

now you’ve become rich,

will you look after me?

Of course I will.

I’m back

because I want us to make money together.

And you guys,

you’ll be the next international superstars.

It sounds like you’re taking us to America.

America is the destination.

But our first stop

-will be Thailand. -Thailand?

Baliang, I’ll be counting on you then.

No problem.

We’ll all be on board.

Lan, we’re waiting for your decision.

Jimmy, let’s go.

Lan!

Look at her,

same old Lan.

I’ve been with the circus for over a decade,

and it’s always been Lan taking care of us.

She has quit the team.

How can we make it without her?

She is not the only woman on the team.

Stop standing there. Help me with the luggage.

Let’s go.

Sawatdee-ka, captain.

Baliang

I’m a bad sailor.

Well,

I’m good with hot bad sailors

You’re so bad.

Mr. Zhang,

have you worked out the auspicious time?

You’re standing so high up there.

Mr. Jin,

the auspicious moment has arrived.

We can set sail now.

Hold on.

We’re waiting for someone.

Lan!

Turns out to be a pretentious bitch.

Jimmy is here too.

Hey, Lan,

I knew you’d come.

Don’t forget what you promised me.

I’ll only perform with you for one show.

After that, their contracts with you are null and void.

Money settled. No debts between anyone.

You have my word.

Lan, I’ll give you a performance

unprecedented, incomparable,

and unmatched in history.

Sawatdee-ka.

Come on,

I can speak Chinese.

Hello,

how long does it take to get there?

Three days if everything goes well.

But, it never goes well.

What do you mean?

I’m speaking literally.

Sawatdee-ka.

Hey, big bro, it’s me.

No problem.

It will be a punctual delivery.

What did you say?

I have bad reception.

My new phone.

Holy shit.

Holy shit.

I hate to see such a beautiful body

go to waste.

Snake!

There is a snake!

Lucky you.

This one is not poisonous.

So it’s not poisonous.

Glad it didn’t hit a vital spot.

How dare you cause trouble on my turf?

I’ll crush you.

This isn’t your turf.

It’s theirs.

Go away.

Baliang,

that must have hurt.

You bet. I might have been poisoned.

Would you like to give me a body check?

Hold on, Baliang.

You promised to make me the leading figure of the circus.

What is she doing here?

Don’t worry. I’ll make you the leading figure

sooner or later.

Zombie!

I forgot to introduce him to you.

This is the recently unearthed

thousand-year-old zombie

portrayed by my cousin.

Cousin, how do you like my performance?

Good.

Cousin?

He is your cousin?

Within the four seas,

we’re all relatives to each other.

What’s so strange about that?

Exactly!

A Chinese Taoist versus a thousand-year-old zombie,

that will be a spectacle to lure foreigners in.

Hey, what are you doing here in the middle of the night?

My cousin said zombies sleep standing up.

So I wanted to practice.

I was actually asleep, then they suddenly came in.

Come in for body check.

Hey, Ali!

I’m still waiting for that body check.

It seems to have come down from upstream.

Can we take a detour?

Yes, but it will cost us a few more days.

No, we can’t afford to waste even a day.

The seller can’t wait.

I mean,

the investor can’t wait.

I’ve already arranged the venue and stage.

If we delay for a day, the whole plan will be ruined.

You must work it out, or I won’t give you a single penny.

There is a way.

Are you sure you can handle it?

I used to blow up mountains.

You can count on me.

Cousin!

Cousin!

Cousin! Help!

Help!

Don’t come over here!

Help!

Help!

Help!

Snakes!

Help!

Bro, I’m so grateful to you.

You saved my life.

As a matter of fact,

you saved me.

Who are you?

You can call me Jeff.

I had some accidents a few days ago.

Thankfully, these coffins saved my life.

Hey, Dajiao!

Dajiao!

Dajiao, are you all right?

There is something in Dajiao’s ear!

Let me take a look at it.

Little guy,

you’re so small

yet so bloodthirsty.

How come you know how to deal with it?

As a wilderness explorer,

I’ve picked up some survival skills.

You never know

what the future holds for you.

Jeff, you’re awesome.

He is no wilderness explorer to me.

He was lying.

What are you talking about?

That was a poisonous snake.

That’s nonsense.

Do you know how many times a person

needs to be bitten by a venomous snake

to develop immunity?

You came to me just for this?

You really disappoint me.

Just find a safe place

and let him get off the boat.

Hey,

Lan.

Wait a moment.

This fishing rod is too thin to

catch anything good.

Just cut the crap.

Where to?

Here.

I’ll triple the offer.

One more word out of you

and you’ll be thrown out of the boat.

This place is cursed,

not blessed by even the Four-Faced Buddha.

It’s not a place for poachers like you

to approach.

Being in a second-rate circus

and being passed around for so many years,

have you ever wondered why?

In today’s society,

only the smart ones survive.

Look at Ali,

she understands this well.

You’re so disgusting.

Don’t have you shame?

Why are you looking at me like that?

Listen,

I’m not that beast-playing guy

I used to be. Now I’m...

That’s right.

After playing a beast for so many years,

you’ve become one yourself.

So disgusting.

Hey.

Captain!

Captain!

Captain！

Did you see our captain?

Captain！

Isn’t he in the cockpit?

Everything could happen

in a rainforest.

It’s normal to have

one or two people missing.

What is that old guy doing?

He should be driving the boat now.

He knew that we’re in a hurry.

The captain is missing.

He is nowhere to be found.

He is missing?

Lan,

what’s that sound?

It freaks me out.

Something big is coming.

Something big is on the hook.

What are you doing?

Don’t you bring trouble to all of us!

Let go of it, or we’ll all be in danger.

Either you lend me a hand or stay away from me.

It has escaped again.

Good morning.

What’s going on here?

By the way, last night the patron saint appeared in my dream and warned me

that today isn’t a good day for fishing.

As far as I know, the captain loves fishing.

We should remind him.

Did you see him?

What’s the matter?

Do I have bad breath?

Nope.

Ah! The captain!

What’s up, cousin?

Come on.

Lan.

Lan, go.

Lan!

Jimmy.

Jimmy.

Ouch.

Cousin, let’s jump.

Ouch.

Jimmy.

Lan.

Lan, go.

The boat is going to explode.

Lan.

Shit.

The boat is ruined.

We can’t make it on time.

Can’t make it on time?

You’re not seriously thinking about the show right now.

Nothing matters more than life.

That thing is a cannibal.

It has eaten the captain.

Cousin, how can a worm grow so big?

What worm?

That’s a huge snake.

It’s a millennia-old snake.

It’s a monster.

You used our boat for bait,

which almost got us all killed.

I didn’t want any of this.

If you had cooperated with me earlier,

maybe we’d all be rich by now.

Do you know how much that big guy is worth?

You shameless poacher.

Come on,

what’s the point of having this argument now?

The priority is figuring out how to leave this place.

Actually, I have a plan.

We’re here, and my boat is here.

If everything goes smoothly, in less than two days,

I’ll get you back to the port safe and sound.

I’m so grateful to you.

You helped me once.

I’ll repay your kindness. Don’t worry.

We’re not going with you.

I don’t trust you.

What should we do then?

Stay here and wait for death?

He will be the death of you.

We need to figure this out ourselves.

We should contact the rescue team.

Look at me and tell me you’ve nothing to do

with the captain’s death.

I’ve no idea what you’re talking about.

It’s up to you who you believe.

I trust Jeff.

He saved me once.

Guys, we’ll come with Jeff.

I’ll come with Lan.

Ali, come with me.

What’s the matter?

What is it?

She has been stung by toxic bees,

which carry a large amount of bacteria.

If she doesn’t receive antibiotics within forty-eight hours,

she may never walk out of here alive.

Does that mean I’ll die here?

Believe it or not,

I have antibiotics on my boat.

Look,

if you’re infected,

you’ll be like these mantises,

desperately searching for water

and end up drowning in it.

We’ll be having this for lunch.

He is eating it raw.

He is like a wild man.

Isn’t he afraid of being infected?

The smell of food might attract other predators.

You better eat quickly.

You seem to be enjoying it a lot.

I’m not hungry.

Help yourself.

Alright.

Jeff, this one is cooked. Have one.

Give it a try.

It tastes really good.

You’re a gourmet.

Lan!

Lan, help me!

Lan, help me!

Lan, help me!

Lan!

Jeff. Wait for me.

Cousin, we should get going.

Why are you standing there?

Why are you standing there? Let’s go.

Cousin.

Hunters have been here before.

We’ll spend the night here.

Spend the night here?

Won’t there be snakes?

Snake repellent has been scattered around here,

so it’s safe for now.

But once we’re out of this area,

it’s hard to say.

Get some rest.

You don’t even believe him.

What makes you decide to come along?

I regret it, a lot.

You don’t want to mess with me right now,

or I’ll leave you here.

I grew up being raised in the circus,

where I had much darker days than this.

Have something sweet.

It will make you feel less sad.

My little brother used to love chocolates,

but he hasn’t had any since he got sick.

I’m not afraid of hardship.

I will make a lot of money

and cure him.

Get some rest after eating the chocolate.

Crimson Anaconda,

so the legend is real.

Jeff,

that’s your target, right?

The reticulated python

is the largest and most expensive wild python

in the world.

The mutated variety with red spots,

there is only one of its kind in the entire world.

If we catch this beauty,

we’d have enough money

to last several lifetimes.

Jeff, count me in.

This snake is nothing ordinary.

It sits at the top of the food chain

in this rainforest.

It won’t even spare its own kind.

Do you have the guts for this?

Jeff, speaking of cruelty,

I have something in common with this anaconda.

Actually, these people

are my merchandises.

Tell me, is there anything I wouldn’t dare to do?

Help!

Help!

Cousin!

Cousin!

Cousin!

Cousin!

Cousin!

Cousin!

-What are you doing here? -It’s water.

Listen, it’s dangerous here. Come back with me.

-Hey. -Water.

The water here is undrinkable.

Water.

There are monsters in the water!

Stop drinking it.

Come back with me.

Hey.

Hey.

Listen to me. We should go now.

If you’re infected, you’ll be like these mantises,

desperately searching for water and end up drowning in it.

Cousin, what am I doing here?

Snake!

Come over here.

There is a snake! There is a snake!

Cousin!

Cousin!

It seems we have to get there by water.

By water?

That will be too dangerous.

Or we can take a two-day detour.

It’s up to you.

Namo Amituofo,

Buddha Shakyamuni,

Bodhi Svaha.

Namo Amituofo,

Buddha Shakyamuni,

Bodhi Svaha.

Namo Amituofo,

Buddha Shakyamuni...

Stay put.

Namo Amituofo,

Buddha Shakyamuni,

Bodhi Svaha.

Namo Amituofo,

Buddha Shakyamuni,

Bodhi Svaha.

Help!

Help!

Help!

Help!

Lan, come back here!

Lan, come back here!

Lan, go!

Lan! Lan!

Did you hear the bones crunching?

It’s so cruel.

Don’t we humans

do the same thing when we eat?

Hey, there is a boat over there!

We can use it to sail home.

We’ve found a boat.

Let’s go. Let’s get on the boat and sail home.

Hold on.

I kept my promise.

In return,

I want you guys to do me a favor.

If what you want is that thing,

we won’t help you.

Well, then...

Just do yourself a favor

and do as Jeff asked.

Jin Baliang, are you crazy?

That is no ordinary anaconda.

You’re right.

That is no ordinary anaconda.

It doesn’t even have a weakness,

except,

when it’s eating.

Jin Baliang, are you crazy?

If you kill us, who will perform for you?

Come on,

are you still thinking about the show?

Haven’t you learned anything from your years of playing an intelligent bear?

Then why did you spend so much money hiring us?

That money is nothing

compared to your bodies.

You see, hearts,

livers,

spleens, lungs, and kidneys

are much more expensive

when sold separately.

Sold separately?

You want to sell our organs?

Wow,

seems like even you’ve become smarter.

But there is a change in the plan.

The creature we’re going to capture

is worth more than you guys.

Jin Baliang, you asshole!

It’s no use.

That jerk used to work in the circus.

It’s a fast knot.

Jeff, everything is ready.

We’re just waiting for it to take the bait.

Wow, thanks, Jeff.

Jeff, I’ll keep watch.

I heard you were sold to the circus from a young age.

What happens

if the animals in the circus misbehave?

Jeff,

in the circus, if an animal misbehaves,

we’ll simply replace it.

Unlike her,

there is nothing I wouldn’t do

in order to survive.

What’s so good about snakes?

Why do you like them so much?

Am I not attractive

to you?

In your next life,

remember to make sure the safety is off.

Go!

Lan!

Go!

There he is.

Ali.

Don’t worry.

We’ll leave this place soon.

Come on,

you’re a lousy liar.

I miss my little brother so much.

If he asks you about me,

just tell him

that I’m doing well,

living the life of

a wealthy, famous star.

Ali!

How is it going?

It still won’t work.

You asshole!

I curse you!

I’m taking you down with me!

Lan.

Lan.

Jia Peng!

Go away.

Just go away.

Lan,

hide yourselves.

Lan!

Lan!

Lan!

Jimmy!

Jimmy!

Jimmy! Lan!

Jimmy! Lan!

Jimmy!

-Lan! -Go!