Original subtitles

Say it out loud.

What am I?

You're a vampire.

Go together like porn and cocaine.

This, I tell you, fucker, you can't.

I've never given much thought to how I'd lose my virginity.

But losing it to a bloodthirsty monster seems like a good way to go.

You're impossibly strong and fast.

Your skin is pure white and cold as ice.

Your eyes are constantly changing.

Sometimes when you talk, you sound like you're from a history book.

I've never seen you eat or drink a thing.

I've never seen you in the sun.

How old are you really?

18.

And how long have you been 18 for?

Over two centuries.

Hello, Debbie. I know what you are.

Then say it.

Out loud.

What am I?

You're a vampire.

Are you afraid of me?

No. Then let me ask you one important question.

What do vampires eat?

You'll eat me.

Where are you taking me?

Up the mountain. That's the cloud cover.

You need to see me in the sunlight.

This is why vampires can't be seen in the sun.

My cock is different.

It's like a hard diamond.

It's beautiful.

Beautiful?

It's the cock of a killer, Bella.

A killer cock that would fuck the life right out of you.

I don't believe that.

Everything about me lures you in.

My hair, my eyes, my body, the smell of my cock involved.

I couldn't even need to lure you in to eat you anyway.

You can't run away from me.

You can never fight me off.

I'm designed to kill and eat humans.

I don't care.

I just want to ride that big, beautiful cock.

You can't, Bella.

Vampire cock is an opiate.

Once it dips into your human pussy, you'll never want it out.

Why did you hate me so much when we met?

Because I've never wanted anyone so badly before.

The smell of your pussy was intoxicating.

That smell.

You'll never smell the human pussy I wanted so badly.

I swear it, I can't control myself.

I would go too far.

I would eat you whole.

It's you, Bella.

The smell of your sweet pussy.

It's like a drug to me.

It's like my own personal brand of heroin.

I don't think I can control myself with you.

You don't need to.

What do you want with me, Bella?

Just give me that cock.

Suck your cock.

It's so cold like a popsicle.

My mouth is so warm.

What?

Swallow it.

Oh, fuck.

You like sucking my vampire cock?

You like sucking my vampire cock? Oh, gosh. Yes, I do.

Ugh.

Oh, no.

dripping with vampire cum.

I was sure of three things.

Edward really was a vampire.

Secondly, he really, really thirsted for my pussy.

What about my blood?

And third, I was absolutely in love with that sweet, hard

vampire cock of his.

It's a lie.

A LIE!

You stay here, Marie. I have to go down to the hardware store. And afterward,

we'll go to the mall and we'll have a grand time, huh?

You won't be long, Daddy. No, not at all, dear.

Uh, if Hans comes by, tell him I'll be back very soon.

Daddy, won't you stay and play with me for a while?

No, darling, I'm too busy. Stay here and play with your doggie, okay? Now you be

a good girl now.

Bye, Daddy.

Come on, darling.

Who are you?

I'm Maria.

Want to play with me?

Would you like one of my flowers?

You have these.

How do you keep them?

I can make a boat.

No, wait!

You're hurting me!

No, I know this is a really great game.

Put me down.

I learned it when I turned 18.

It's a really great game.

Do you want to see my titties, Mr.

Monster?

You like them, don't you?

Wow, look at that big hard cock. Can I go for a ride? Oh, yeah.

Are

you

ready?

Can't marry.

Ask your beer drinking buddy.

And they will say it's nutty.

Try, try, try not to fuck them.

It'll be a bargain.

Try, try, try it. And when you come,

you'll be hard again. Fluts and hooks.

Kelly, I just got the new issue of Biggins.

Can't a man get a little alone time?

Selling shoes all day, come home, no dinner, never any sex.

And what do you need?

Money?

Why did Mom leave at 2 this morning with a suitcase?

Your mother, who I love with all of my heart.

One ticket to Fort Lauderdale.

She's gone.

Yes.

Kelly, why are you up at 2 o 'clock in the morning?

I was in the backseat of the Dodge with one of the neighbors while I was lined

up as a client with me.

She wanted her cut, so she banged on the window. I totally thought it was Bud.

I am so blessed.

Well, she wanted me to give this to you.

Great. Is this another credit card, Bill? I don't know what it is.

Oh, yeah. Come sit next to me. Cook what I wanted.

It's been wonderful being married to a shoe salesman and an extravagant

lifestyle we shared, but I've decided to leave you for my new boyfriend I've

been fucking recently.

He makes more money in a day than you did in the entire 80s alone.

Of course, that's not hard. You sell shoes for a living.

But before I get on with my new life, I think it's important I tell you

something. And no, Al, it's not what a clitoris is for.

It's about our wonderful daughter Kelly.

Well... My wonderful daughter, Kelly. I know I've always told you those 30

seconds of passionate love we shared in the backseat of the Dodge conceived her,

but I lied.

Do you remember about 19 years ago when I told you I was going on a college

visit in Ohio?

I really spent the weekend with the offensive line at the lake and got gang

banged all weekend.

Ever wonder why Kelly has blonde hair and we're both brunettes?

I think you remember Dan Neal.

That hunk with the long blonde locks?

That's Kelly's dad.

I still masturbate to him.

Dan Lio?

No wonder he always gave me that.

Look.

Now, bud, he's yours.

Anyways, now that you know Kelly is not your real daughter, maybe you can take

an active role in the career path I've laid out for her.

In close with this letter is a list of all the men in a 10 -mile radius of the

house that are clients of hers.

At least one of my kids was a success.

Bye, loser.

Come on above them.

Don't you mean a conundrum?

No, not always.

I tried more bareback.

Kelly, doesn't any of this upset you?

Your mother, my wife, has just left us.

We found out you're not even my kid.

You just lost a daddy.

But gained a client.

A child that I thought was a product of my love?

A girl born in a garage?

That I raised all those years?

That red -haired she -devil who stole the best years of my life?

From high school football hero to the shell of a man?

Do I dare go there?

Yeah, I should have got rid of that.

I got a DNA test.

What do you do for your clients, little girl?

You strip for them? Yeah.

You could have been

doing this for years.

A young penny.

You like Dave?

That's foreplay. Way to 19 years.

Give it to me, Daddy.

Daddy.

Oh, your cock feels so good.

Oh yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Honestly, your mother didn't teach you how to suck cock.

Oh, yeah.

You know what you're doing.

You know what the fuck you're doing.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Oh, yes.

Yeah, that's my dead little girl. Fuck you. Suck my big fucking cock.

Daddy, where's my earring go?

Yeah? I'm begging, baby.

Yeah, that daddy fucking beggins.

You have such a nice cock.

That was fucking awesome.

I'm gonna dick so fucking hard, Kelly.

Oh, yeah, that's it. You suck it out.

Yeah.

Fuck, yeah.

Yeah, suck it out.

Suck it out.

Suck it up in your mouth.

You like having your balls sucked?

Yeah, that's my dog.

Hmm.

You suck cock like a pro. I am, Daddy.

Oh, that's right.

I can't wait about having some of my clients.

Daddy, that feels so good.

You like my tight pussy?

You like that gaping maw of your mother?

After spitting out two, one kid.

Oh yeah, fuck you.

Mmm.

It's so hard to treat me like one.

Like a storyline, just like mom.

Thank you.

I don't know what mom's been complaining about all these years.

do the fucking work.

Right there, right there, right there, make me fucking go. Right fucking there.

Two hundred dollars.

What? You want to get it for free?

Well, I am your pimp.

That's right.

The night Leah wore her wild animal suit and made mischief -fucking boys drove

her mother to ground her and sent her to a room without dinner. Leah yelled,

Fuck off, Mom!

Poor little Leah went to bed without her dinner and a pussy still hungry for

more cock.

That night in Leah's room a jungle began to grow and grow and grow until the

ceiling was covered in vines and the walls became a dark forest.

An ocean tumbled by with a canoe for Leah, and she paddled off through the

night, and into days, and into weeks, for almost a year to where the wild

are.

When Leah came to the place where the wild beasts lived, they yelled their

terrible yells, and showed their terrible balls, and rolled their big bad

and waved their terrible cocks.

So Leo said, behave, and tamed them with her magic spells of staring into their

big hairy costume balls and not blinking once.

And they were scared and

called her the wildest slut of all.

Leah used her magic wand to swell their big wild cocks and show them why she was

the wildest girl of all.

And then Leah said, let the wild rumpet begin.

Oh.

No.

Thank you.

The queen of the wild things was lonely and wanted to be where people loved her

most of all.

So Leah gave up being queen of the wild things and got ready to leave.

But the wild things yelled, do not go, we'll eat you up, and we love to fuck

so.

But Leah said no.

The wild things yelled their terrible yells and showed their horrible balls

waved their terrible cocks.

But Leah stepped into her canoe and waved goodbye.

and sailed back over the year, into the week, back into days, and into the

night, and into her very own room, where she found her own bed waiting for her

still nice and hot, just like her little wild twat.