Original subtitles

THE EXCITEMENT IS TANGIBLE, AS DETHKLOK WILL ARRIVE AT ANY

MINUTE TO THIS, THE SINGLE LARGEST PRESS CONFERENCE IN

RECORDED HISTORY.

FOR THE FIRST TIME ANYWHERE, THE BAND WILL DISCUSS THEIR

HIGHLY ANTICIPATED NEW ALBUM.

NEVER HAS THE RELEASE OF AN ALBUM MEANT SO MUCH TO SO MANY

PEOPLE.

TELL US ABOUT THE NEW ALBUM.

Pickles: I'VE ALWAYS SAID THIS -- TALKING ABOUT MUSIC IS

LIKE PAINTING ABOUT FARTING.

[ LAUGHTER ] Skwisgaar: OH, MY GOD.

CAN YOU GUYS EVER BE SERIOUS?

Nathan: UH, CAN I EVER BE SERIOUS?

"CAN I EVER BE SERIOUS" IS A GOOD QUESTION.

CAN I EVER BE SERIOUS?

I DON'T KNOW. I GUESS...

[Echoing] THAT'S DOABLE!

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] THANK YOU.

THANK YOU.

I'M REALLY GLAD EVERYONE LOVES MY CATCHPHRASE.

HOW COME WHAT'S-HIS-FACE ISN'T HERE?

Nathan: WHAT'S-HIS-FACE?

UH, TOKI!

Nathan: OH, TOKI.

Pickles: AH, TOKI'S NOT HERE.

Nathan: I GUESS WE FORGOT HIM.

I WONDER IF THAT'S DOABLE.

THANK YOU.

Skwisgaar: I WONDERS WHERE HE AMS.

Toki: HEY, GUYS, I MADES EVERYONES SOME DELIMPTIOUS

CHICKENS TENDERS WITH AMS ALL NATURALS WHITES MEAT.

[ LAUGHTE ] AH, WHATS THE HELLS?

OH, THEY DIDS IT AGAINS.

THEY LEFTS ME BEHINDS!

MURDERFACE, MURDERFACE, OVER HERE!

Murderface: GO AHEAD, DENNIS.

WHAT'S WITH THE FACIAL HAIR?

Murderface: UH, IT'S CALLED LOOKIN' GOOD.

NEXT QUESTION!

UH, YEAH.

I HAVE A QUESTION IN REGARDS TO YOUR FAN BASE.

WHY ARE THE MAJORITY OF METAL FANS WHITE?

I MEAN, DO YOU ONLY SEEK OUT WHITE AUDIENCES?

AND WHAT WOULD YOU SAY TO METAL FANS THAT AREN'T WHITE?

JUST ASKIN'.

Nathan: UH...

OH, UH, ONE LAST THING -- ARE...YOU...RACIST?

[ DRAMATIC NOTE PLAYS ] ♪ TICK-TOCK TICK-TOCK

♪ TICK-TOCK TICK-TOCK ♪ TICK-TOCK TICK-TOCK

♪ DETHKLOK! DETHKLOK! DETHKLOK!

DETHKLOK! ♪

IS DETHKLOK RACIST?

THE ACCUSATION OF RACISM IS A SUREFIRE WAY TO END THE CAREER

OF EVEN THE MOST BELOVED CELEBRITIES.

IF DETHKLOK WANTS TO AVOID THE SAME FATE, THEY'RE GOING TO

HAVE TO DO SOMETHING DRASTIC TO SIDESTEP THIS DAMNING CHARGE.

Charles: SO, WE'RE GONNA BE DOING SOME COMMUNITY OUTREACH TO

COMBAT THE, UH, NEGATIVE PRESS RESULTING FROM, UH, YOUR

APPARENT RACIAL INSENSITIVITY.

Pickles: "YOUR APPARENT RACIAL SENSITIVITY?"

DO YOU THINK THAT SOUNDS A LITTLE RACIST?

Nathan: YEAH, THAT SOUNDED A LITTLE RACIST TO ME.

Charles: IT'S NOT ME THAT THEY'RE CALLING RACIST.

THEY'RE CALLING YOU RACIST.

Nathan: WE'RE NOT RACIST!

WE DON'T GIVE A FUCK WHAT COLOR OUR FANS ARE BECAUSE WE

DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT OUR FANS!

ISN'T THAT RIGHT?

Pickles: BOY, IS IT EVER!

Charles: EITHER WAY, THE MEDIA THINKS YOU'RE RACIST.

Nathan: HEY, LISTEN, I KNOW WE LIKE TO JOKE AROUND A LOT

ABOUT EVERYTHING.

BUT I LOVE ETHNICS. I MEAN, I LOVE MEXICAN...FOOD.

Murderface: YEP.

Nathan: CHINESE FOOD.

Murderface: YEP.

Nathan: BLACK, UH, LICORICE.

Pickles: I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE EVEN HAVE TO SAY IF A

PERSON'S A D-- A COLOR.

I WALKED DOWN THE STREET, AND THERE WAS A GUY ASKING ME FOR

MONEY.

Murderface: YEAH.

I WAS WALKING DOWN THE STREET, AND A FEW GUYS MADE ME REALLY

NERVOUS, AND I WALKED ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE STREET.

JUST SOME GUYS!

Pickles: MY COUSIN WAS RAPED BY A BUNCH OF GUYS.

Murderface: SOME GUYS' NEIGHBORHOODS JUST HAVE LIQUOR

STORES AND NOT PROPER SUPERMARKETS -- JUST GUYS.

Pickles: WHEN I'M WALKING IN PARTICULAR AREAS IN THE CITY, I

MIND MY WALLET AROUND SOME GUYS.

Nathan: WRITE THAT DOWN AND PUT OUT A PRESS RELEASE.

Murderface: RACIST. HA!

PROVIN' IT WRONG!

Charles: ALL RIGHT, GUYS, WE GOT TO GET SERIOUS ABOUT THIS,

OKAY?

IF YOU GET CALLED RACIST, THEN YOU'RE DONE, ALL RIGHT?

YOUR CAREER'S OVER, AND YOU CAN'T RECOVER FROM THAT, ALL

RIGHT?

SO THIS COMMUNITY OUTREACH PROGRAM BETTER BE PERFECT, OKAY?

YOU HEAR ME?

Murderface: WE GOT TO NAIL IT, GUYS!

Charles: THAT'S RIGHT, MURDERFACE, BECAUSE AMERICA'S

NUMEROUS ANTI-DEFAMATION LEAGUES WILL BE THERE.

Pickles: HEY, GUYS, WHERE'S TOKI?

Murderface: AH, LAZY -- JUST LAZY.

Charles: GUYS, TRY TO BE NICE TO TOKI.

HE'S FEELING A LITTLE EXCLUDED LATELY.

Toki: ♪ THOSE JERKS HAVES LEFT ME BEHIND ♪

♪ WHY'D THEY FORGET ABOUT ME? ♪ I'M INSIGNIFICANTS

♪ I'M SECONDS CLASS IN MY OWN BANDS ♪

♪ I'M SICK OF THIS ♪ I WON'TS TAKE IT NO MORE

♪ IT'S GOTTA CHANGE ♪ IT'S GOTTA CHANGE

♪ IT'S GOTTA CHANGE ♪ I'MS GONNA START A CLUB

TODAY ♪ ♪ GONNA DO THINGS MY OWNS WAY

♪ I'LL INVITES THE ONES I LIKES ♪

♪ GONNA MAKE A LIST TONIGHTS ♪ AND WE'LL DRESS JUST LIKE THE

GODS ♪ ♪ TRIM OUR MUSTACHES IN SQUADS

♪ WITH LOVE ♪ I'LL BUILD A CLUBS WITH

LOVES ♪ ♪ WITH LOVES

♪ WITH LOVES I'D LIKES TO MAKE AN

ANNOUNCEMENT -- TOKI AMS FORMING AN EXCLUSIVES CLUBS CALLEDS THE

SPECIAL PERSONS INVITES CLUB.

'CAUSE TOKI'S AMS TIREDS OF BEING EXCLUDEDS.

AND BEST OF ALLS, I AMS THE LEADER.

THAT'S WHY THE LOGOS AMS GOING TO BE A LOWER CASE "T" FOR TOKI.

Nathan: OH, TOKI, IS THIS ABOUT US LEAVING YOU BEHIND THE

OTHER DAY?

LOOK, WE MADE A MISTAKE.

AND YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I HATE TO APOLOGIZE, SO YOU GET THE IDEA.

Toki: WELL, THIS WASN'T THE FIRST TIME!

HOW COMES I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS SUITS OF ARMORS FRIDAYS?

HOW COMES I'M THE ONLY ONES WHO DIDN'T KNOWS ABOUTS KITTY

WHISKERS MONDAYS?

HOW COMES YOU TRICKEDS ME INTO DRESSING UP LIKE A BANANA AT THE

ZOOS?

[ BOING! ] Nathan: OKAY, YOU GOT A

POINT.

YOU WANT ME IN YOUR CLUB?

WELL, I HAVE TWO WORDS TO SAY TO YOU -- THAT IS DOABLE.

I'LL BE IN YOUR CLUB!

Skwisgaar: OHHH! Murderface: OH, YEAH!

CAN'T WAIT, SERIOUSLY.

I CANNOT WAIT FOR THIS CLUB.

Toki: YOU CAN'T JUST JOINS MY CLUBS.

YOU GOTS TO BE INVITED.

YOU CAN ONLY GETS INS IF YOU GETS A SPECIAL TEXT MESSAGE FROM

ME.

[ CELLPHONE TONE PLAYS ] Nathan: WHOA!

"YOU HAS BEEN INVITEDS TO..."

I THINK I GOT IN!

[ CELLPHONE TONE PLAYS ] Pickles: HEY, I GOT INTO

TOKI'S CLUB!

Skwisgaar: UH, ME TOOS.

I'M INS!

Murderface: I GOT NOTHING.

MAYBE IT'S A BAD RECEP-- Toki: YOU AMS NOTS GETTING

INVITEDS TO MY CLUBS BECAUSE YOUR MUSTACHE LOOKS STUPIDS.

YOU AIN'TS GOTS THE RIGHT LOOK.

Murderface: ERR...

MY -- MY -- MY MUSTACHE?

Stampingston: GENTLEMEN, IT APPEARS AS IF DETHKLOK IS DOING

SOME COMMUNITY OUTREACH IN AN EFFORT TO SQUASH RACIST

ALLEGATIONS.

HERE TO DISCUSS THE RAMIFICATIONS OF THESE EFFORTS

IS DR. KRUMPWORTH CHPONGLASIA IV JR.

IT IS A COMPLICATED ERA FOR GAYLORDS, CHINKS, HONKEYS, OR

CHONKEYS WHO ACCIDENTALLY SAY RACIST OR OTHER INSENSITIVE

THINGS THAT THEY DO OR DO NOT MEAN.

Stampingston: YES.

DO JEW...

KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT?

AND FOR THIS SPIC-LY BEHAVIOR, THE MICKS AND THE JEW-WOPS WILL

GET THROWN INTO THE CHING-CHONG COOP WITH THE REST OF THE DOUBLE

HOMOS AND THE WORST OF THEM, THE YOU-KNOW-WHO'S.

OUR ONLY HOPE IS TO BRING ALL OF THESE WONDERFUL DUNE SPONGES

TOGETHER THAT WE MAY ALL EMBRACE OUR DIFFERENCES AND FUCK EACH

OTHER DOGGY-STYLE BECAUSE IT'S MUCH DIRTIER THAT WAY.

THANK YOU.

Orlaag: SPEAKING OF OPPOSITION, THE TECHNOLOGICAL

GENIUS LEADER OF THE WORLD'S FOREMOST ANTI-DETHKLOK GROUP,

THE REVENGENCERS, EDGAR JOMFRU, WAS LAST SPOTTED AT THE ATTACK

ON MORDHAUS.

BUT NOW WE BELIEVE HIM TO BE IN DETHKLOK'S CAPTIVITY.

Charles: WHAT IS IT, JOMFRU?

WHILE TRYING TO DECODE THESE FALCONBACK BLUEPRINTS WE'VE

INTERCEPTED, I'VE BEEN LISTENING TO DETHKLOK'S "DETHWATER" ALBUM,

MY PERSONAL FAVORITE.

AND I DISCOVERED SUBSONIC FREQUENCIES HIDDEN IN THE

RECORDING.

THEY'RE NOT MADE BY INSTRUMENTS.

THEY'RE MADE BY WHALES.

THERE'S A REPEATING MESSAGE I KEEP HEARING.

I BELIEVE THEY ARE TRYING TO COMMUNICATE WITH THE BAND.

THERE'S A WAY TO TRANSLATE THIS.

I JUST NEED SOME TIME.

Charles: YES.

IT'S ALL BEGINNING TO HAPPEN.

Pickles: ♪ SPECIAL PERSONS INVITE CLUB ♪

♪ THAT IS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT ♪

Nathan: ♪ SPECIAL PERSONS INVITE CLUB ♪

♪ THAT IS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT ♪

Skwisgaar: ♪ SPECIAL PERSONS INVITES CLUB ♪

♪ THAT IS WHAT I'M TALKINGS ABOUT ♪

[ ALL CHEER ] Toki: I KNEW YOU GUYS WOULD

LIKES THE CLUBS.

I AMS NEVER BEEN HAPPIERS IN MY WHOLES ENTIRES LIFE!

[ UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS ] Murderface: I THOUGHT MY

MUSTACHE WOULD BRING ME POPULARITY AND ACCEPTANCE, BUT

IT'S DRIVEN ME FURTHER INTO DISFIGURED ISOLATION.

IT'S A VICIOUS WORLD THAT MAKES A MAN CHOOSE BETWEEN A MUSTACHE

AND A SPECIAL PERSONS INVITE CLUB.

[ GRUNTS ] Toki: I ORDERED SOME UNIFORMS

FOR ALL CLUBS MEMBERS.

WILL YOU GUYS WEARS THEM?

Nathan: THAT'S DOABLE!

[ LAUGHTER ] Pickles: HOW DOES HE HAVE THE

ENERGY TO KEEP DOING IT?

Toki: THAT WAS A SPECIAL EXCLUSIVE CLUBS "DOABLE."

Murderface: SO, TOKI, I COULDN'T CUT MY 'STACHE.

BUT I MATTED MY HAIR DOWN WITH SOME POMADE AND SOME BUTTER.

AND I THINK YOU'LL ALL AGREE THAT I HAVE THE RIGHT LOOK AND

THAT I'M FINALLY FITTING IN.

I'M DEFINITELY CLUB MATERIAL HERE, IF I SAY SO MYSELF.

Toki: HMM.

YOUR EFFORTS HASN'TS GONES UNAPPRECIATED, YET I REGRETS TO

UNFORMS YOU THAT YOUR LOOKS AMS STILLS UNACCEPTABLE.

Murderface: CUT THE CRAP.

WHAT IS THIS REALLY ABOUT, HUH?!

THIS IS MY FUCKING LIFE WE'RE TALKING ABOUT!

A MAN'S MUSTACHE IS HIS WHOLE WORLD.

I WANT IN THAT FUCKING CLUB!

Toki: I CAN'TS HEAR ANYTHINGS.

I CAN ONLY HEARS OFFICIAL CLUBS MEMBERS.

TONIGHT, "ERACISM."

DETHKLOK IS ACHIEVING THE IMPOSSIBLE BY RECOVERING FROM

ACCUSATIONS OF DISCRIMINATION.

A MULTICULTURAL AUDIENCE OF THOUSANDS HAVE GATHERED IN

SUPPORT AS DETHKLOK UNVEILS THEIR EXTRAVAGANT NEW URBAN

YOUTH DETHCENTER.

Charles: GUYS, THIS, UH, YOUTH CENTER IS GOING TO MEAN A

LOT TO YOUR MINORITY FANS.

SO LET'S JUST GET THROUGH THIS, AND WE WON'T BE, UH, RACIST

ANYMORE.

I MEAN, UH, WE NEVER WERE, BUT UH, PEOPLE THOUGHT WE WERE.

BUT I KNOW THAT I'M NOT RACIST, AND I SUSPECT THAT YOU'RE NOT.

OKAY, ONCE THEY GET THEIR BUILDING --

Nathan: THEY? Charles: OKAY.

THEN WE GET OUR NONRACIST REPUTATION BACK.

OKAY, WHERE'S MURDERFACE?

Murderface: ALL RIGHT, TOKI.

YOU WIN.

I GOTTA TRIM THIS MUSTACHE.

OH FUCK! Charles: EVERYBODY READY?

Pickles: OH, DID YOU NOTICE, NATHAN?

THERE'S GONNA BE A COOL, UH, LOGO ONSTAGE FOR TOKI'S CLUB?

Nathan: YEAH.

EVERYBODY GOT YOUR COOL TOKI OUTFIT ON?

Pickles: I'VE ALL THIS EXTRA DANGLE ROOM FOR MY FUCKING

IRISH COCK, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN, TOKI?

TOKI?

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING

FOR, MAGNANIMOUS ACCEPTORS OF ALL RACES -- DETHKLOK!

[ CROWD GASPS ] Nathan: HELLO, FRIENDS.

WHAT A GREAT EVENING FOR BROTHERLY LOVE.

Pickles: LOTS OF NONRACIST, HAPPY ACCEPTANCE.

Skwisgaar: HOLY SHITS GUYS.

WE AMS DRESSED LIKE THE FUCKING KLANS.

[ CROWD GASPS ] Pickles: FUCKING TOKI!

YOUR SPECIAL OUTFITS, WHILE VERY COMFORTABLE, ARE GOING TO GET US

KILLED!

Toki: AH, YOU FUCKINGS LEFT ME AGAIN!

Murderface: WAIT FOR ME!

I'M READY TO BE IN THE CLUB!

Charles: OH, DEAR GOD.

Murderface: OH FUCK LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!

Pickles: LET'S SCRAMBLE!

Nathan: YEAH!

THIS IS SO NOT DOABLE.