Original subtitles

Previously on "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills."

Oh, bitch, he's hot, yeah, even with the mask.

I don't want to [inaudible].

- I don't, either. - They don't--

Just want to have a lot of sex.

Yeah.

Your liquor level was beyond.

Yes.

Under no circumstances can you disrespect my kid.

She's gone through so much.

She's sort of, like, being a little more free with us,

showing a more vulnerable side of her.

And you don't think that could lead to an alcoholism?

I wake up every morning thinking

about everything I eat.

Give me a hug. - I'm so sorry.

You're so gorgeous.

And I know you know that.

I want to eat a meal and, like,

be OK with it, you know?

I don't want to, like, hate what I'm eating every day.

Let the party begin.

This is so pretty!

[gasps] Whoa. Wow.

I've never seen so many Christmas trees in my life.

Hi! Oh, my God! Oh, look at us.

We are both, like, wearing nothing, I love it.

Eat it and feel guilty, or you deny yourself eating it?

I'm just curious. - No, I eat it and feel bad.

Ah.

Well, I always think take laxatives and get rid of it.

Wow.

A laxative?

She has an eating disorder.

[dramatic music]

[upbeat music]

What is it, babes?

Ah, ah.

Oh, what is this?

Chicken tender and barbecue ranch.

- Oh, my God. - You can't have this.

It's a chicken tender. - I'm not gonna eat that.

All right, I need another drink.

- Hi! - Hi!

- How are you? - Oh, Sheree!

Let's do mitts. Good to see you.

Nice to see you.

I'm trying to think when I last saw you.

I don't think you've ever seen me, Kathy.

- Of course I have. - You have?

I don't forget faces.

I don't know.

I think this might be our first time meeting?

You look familiar.

But you know my eyes, you never know.

Oh, my God.

How are you? - Good, how are you?

Wait, I thought you were Kyle.

- [laughs] - I'm not kidding you.

I get that all the time.

Let's go inside for a bit.

♪ Yeah

[piano music]

Come on in, ladies. Come on in.

Oh, this is lovely.

I'm going to sit here, if that's all right.

You can't read those, girl. Get, get, get.

- Bitch-- - Get. Get.

Show off your Broadway background, come on.

No-- [laughter]

Honey, that sh-- crashed two years ago.

[vocalizing]

[cheering]

Everyone's looking amazing tonight.

[gentle piano music]

♪

♪ O holy night

♪ The stars are brightly shining ♪

♪ It is the night

♪ Of our dear savior's birth

♪ Fall on your knees

Asher singing, it's so magical.

It really is so moving and so meaningful.

He is a talent.

both:

♪ Noel

I think Erika probably misses the spotlight.

both: ♪ Oh, hear

♪ The angels' voices

She won't shut up.

It's awkward.

♪ Oh, night

Hit the high note!

♪ Divine

both: ♪ Oh, night

♪ When Christ was born

Erika, I think, has had far too much to drink.

And her behavior, I think it's not respectful.

And it feels a little bit out of control.

both: ♪ Noel

[vocalizing]

[cheering]

Hell yeah!

♪ O, holy night

Yes! [cheering]

Just got to belt sometimes.

[cheering]

Thank you, thank you.

[jazzy festive music]

♪

Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas, everybody.

Cheers, cheers.

I love this little bag, my love.

- My love, this is, like-- - It's so pretty.

- An antique, basically. - Is it?

- No, it's-- - It was last season.

That's an antique in Beverly Hills.

- Yes, it is. - It is.

You guys want a drink? Yes, you do.

[laughter] - I've had enough drinks.

I'm already lit.

I'd like the champagne, orgasm moment.

All right.

By the way, you guys are a mess.

Look at those fries on the floor.

- Kathy did it. - Oh!

Kathy did it!

I feel like a toddler was at McDonald's.

Thank you very much. I appreciate that.

Kathy, girl, I'm so lit.

- I know. - Kath-- hi, love.

How is Paris?

She is so happy. She is doing really well.

Kathy, I want to say something,

and I want to get it off my chest.

OK.

You invited me to a lot of events.

And the truth is, I didn't want to bring

my scorn and my ----ing scarlet letter

onto your daughters and onto you.

I can't.

I-- I understand that, but of course you're always included.

And please don't make me cry.

Because the truth is-- I can't.

- Aw. - Aw, sweetheart.

- No, it's OK. - Aw.

I didn't want that.

But you at least replied.

If you didn't reply at all, that's a whole different thing.

Kathy, listen--

But I always respect everybody's feelings.

I knew that you were adult enough to understand.

But please explain to Paris and Nicky that it's not personal.

I definitely will.

She said, I didn't want to bring that

---ing shame onto something that

should have been so beautiful.

Cheers to that. all: Cheers.

Paris and Carter. [laughs]

Paris and Carter.

- Merry Christmas. - Merry Christmas.

- Merry Christmas. - Where is this--

She looked ----ing fab.

Amen to that.

I'm going inside because I'm a little cold.

Thinking back to the Sutton and Diana thing at my house--

I think that Diana isn't ready to accept anything.

She's right.

And do you apologize, or do you expect an apology?

I don't know any of that. - I'm done apologizing.

How they left, I wouldn't have even thought

she would come here tonight. But she was excited to come.

I'm not kidding you, maybe one hour

before we were supposed to leave,

she tested positive for COVID. - Shut up.

I was on the phone with her for 30 minutes.

- Yeah. - Wow.

She called me on the way here, so--

- Oh, my gosh. - Yeah.

You know the thing that kills me about Sutton is,

I do get that she's really lonely-feeling.

Yeah, she is.

And when she said to me tonight,

I'm going to have to be alone now for Christmas,

it really, really broke my heart.

- Yeah, that's hard. Sucks. - Really broke my heart.

I know she was saying since you had COVID, maybe you can--

- Me? - Still come-- no, me.

Oh.

Me-- like, she said, come over.

So I don't know.

I've never spent Christmas totally alone.

Have you? - No.

- Hi, Kathy! - Hello.

- My old friend. - Yeah.

How's Erika?

It was getting out of control.

- Put your drink down. - No.

Did you know she told my son to [BLEEP] off,

my 14-year-old?

You don't ever want to put yourself

in a position of drinking, and then losing control

and doing something stupid. - No. Absolutely not.

She's kind of, like, loosening up and feeling free

with all of us.

And she's maybe making little mistakes.

And we kind of gotta cut her some slack, kind of a thing.

You cut her some slack.

I don't need to cut her some slack.

♪

Coming up...

I'm going to hide the purse. Quickly.

Where's my purse?

Kathy, what did you do with my bag?

[upbeat music]

♪

How's Erika?

You don't ever want to put yourself

in a position of drinking, and then losing control

and doing something stupid. - Absolutely not.

She's kind of, like, loosening up and feeling free

with all of us.

And she's maybe making little mistakes.

And we kind of gotta cut her some slack, kind of a thing.

You cut her some slack.

I don't need to cut her some slack.

Can I be honest about who inspired me

to take care of my mental health?

It's her daughter, Amelia.

I'm on Lexapro. Guess what?

Now I'm on Wellbutrin, and I'm on other things.

And yes, I've had a few drinks.

But the truth is, I'm OK.

I know we're all friends.

And I just feel like sometimes, we

can't always be in denial just for the safety

of our friendship.

Seeing her in Mexico, on the boat,

she was out of control.

- Garcelle? - Yeah?

Go down and pee on that new girl.

I'm not peeing on the new girl.

Nah, hell no, bitch. Whatever.

And then seeing her at my party--

What are you doing here?

Go.

Don't cuss.

- Don't talk to him like that. - What?

You said, "Get the [BLEEP] out of here,"

and that's not OK.

Also, tonight, Asher's singing,

and she's shouting out.

Hit the high note!

I think I'm ultra-sensitive to if someone says,

oh, this person is drinking too much, or this person--

Mm.

Because honestly, probably because of her sister, Kim.

It's very dangerous to throw around labels like that,

like a drinking problem.

And Garcelle wants me to say that.

She's baiting me.

So I'm not doing that.

I just get nervous with--

I think, like, it feels like a label, almost.

And that makes me go into, like--

But I'm just saying that sometimes, there doesn't need

to be an excuse for something.

It can just be bad.

But it should not be excuse for poor behavior.

No, right.

I think Kyle's idea of being a loyal friend

is 100% backing the person.

I actually disagree on that.

When I'm doing something wrong,

I expect my good friends to call me out,

not just back me blindly.

This is not her normal behavior, and--

You can say that because you've known her more.

I can't-- - Right, but--

I can't say that.

Can you-- can't you be a little

open-minded and say that?

That she's never done that before?

You know that.

I've seen her attack Sutton

like nobody's business.

But that wasn't drunk behavior.

You know what?

I couldn't have made it through this, like,

very important time in my life without Lisa, her daughters,

and other people who have, like, surrounded me.

And that's what friends... all: Are for.

But you know what?

When you want to, like, parse it up and make it ugly,

and make it, like, unfriendly, and make it like,

oh, my God, we don't understand, that's

when you run into sh--.

[laughs]

Thank you for this beautiful party.

This is beautiful.

It's our first time out. - Thank you both for coming.

You need to go home and go to bed now, though, because--

- Who, me? - Yes, you.

There are a lot of bedrooms up here, by the way.

Do you want to stay here?

There's a lot of bedrooms. No, seriously.

- Are you crazy? - [laughs]

- I live right down the road. - I know.

Hey.

Hey, I'm saying goodbye.

- Aw. - Oh, we should go, too.

[laughter]

I didn't come over here to start trouble, Rinna.

I didn't come over here-- - No, no, my mistake.

She just told me it's time to go.

You don't want to ruin my Christmas party?

Thank you so much for the invitation.

This house is gorgeous. - Let me say goodbye, too.

Come on. - Thank you so much.

[BLEEP]. Oops.

[laughter]

- Close your legs. - I did.

We're leaving. We're leaving.

[laughter] - Diana, help her.

- OK. - Of course.

I love you all. [laughter]

Come on. Let's go.

Let's go, sister. - Good luck.

Maybe tonight will be the night where

everybody sees that Erika is having a hard time.

Say goodbye. Wait, wait, this way.

There we go. Here we go.

Bye, girls.

Diana, thank you so much. - Bye.

Bye, Garcelle. Love you.

- Goodbye. - Careful, careful.

Let's go. Careful, careful.

I mean, I've been saying it all along.

I know I'm right.

I don't want to be right, but it's happening

right in front of us.

This is really, really, really beautiful.

- Thank you, love. - Really beautiful.

Thank you.

Thank you so much for coming. - You're welcome.

And I'd want to have lunch, dinner.

I would love to. You know, obviously--

I'm sorry-- like, my behavior at your party

was inappropriate.

It really was.

Sutton said few things--

she literally pressed every button there was to press.

You're an asshole. And--

Hold on, hold on.

No, she's a ----ing asshole.

[laughs] Oh, my God.

You're a soulless person.

Stop.

You came in, just really beautiful in your white dress.

I lashed out in the worst possible way, in a rude way.

Don't touch me. Don't. - Wow.

Are you her bodyguard?

- I'm not her bodyguard. - You are her mouthpiece?

Oh, you know what? That's bullsh--.

You're being really mean right now.

I-- I really, I do.

I apologize. - Thank you for that.

I always feel like there's part of yourself--

I see it in your eyes, that you like me.

Yeah. Well, thank you for tonight.

Thank you for apologizing.

Happy holidays. Stay safe. - Thank you.

I enjoyed Garcelle tonight.

She seemed to be at ease.

She's approachable.

But then again, I don't know if it's me or her, or just

Sutton not being there.

Thank you so much.

And have a good night. - Good night.

- Good night. - Thank you.

I'm going to hide the purse. Quickly.

[mischievous music]

Where's my purse?

Kathy?

This is not an Easter egg hunt.

Kyle, you never look enough, you know?

What did you do with my bag?

I don't know what it is with my sisters

and wanting to hide things.

I want to hobble off.

Kim, where are the crutches? [laughs]

I don't know.

This was my sister's way of kidnapping me.

She thinks if I don't have my purse, I can't leave.

And then I can hang out and have some more fun.

You literally hid it. I know you.

- I lost my phone. - Oh!

You don't think I know you inside

and out after all these years?

- Where's my phone? - I don't care.

- You don't care? - No.

You're not going to help me find my phone?

Send me a message in a bottle.

Bye, guys.

Coming up.

We do not lie to one another.

- No, I wasn't-- - Period.

- I decided... - Wait a second.

That I wasn't telling you something.

Are you kidding me?

[tense music]

♪

Honey?

Yeah?

I'm a little bit jaded.

- Honey-- - I feel all right.

Jaded is not-- you don't say--

That not the right word?

No, jaded in the U.S. is very different than it is--

Well, jaded in the UK means, like, just--

You just don't feel like yourself.

I had to deal with my mom and dad

on the press that came out about the suspicion of DUI.

Oh, yeah--

That wasn't an easy conversation.

I know, a gazillion people texting me.

Three weeks ago, PK went to a work dinner.

He was driving home after having a glass of wine,

got pulled over and brought to the station.

"Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" star PK Kemsley

was arrested for suspicion of DUI.

PK had been driving home from dinner last month

when he was pulled over on the 101 freeway.

And he was held at the station for an hour,

and then driven home by California Highway Patrol.

Here we are, weeks later.

And suddenly, the press have found out

magically about PK getting pulled over

for suspicion of DUI.

'Cause I leave for London, like, a few days later,

a day later or something--

God, PK, it's like the days just blend into one another.

I found out the next day. He told me.

But PK was really, really, really upset about it.

Then he went to London.

Now we have to have a conversation again.

Because now, I'm annoyed again.

Well, I haven't even told you, like,

the anxiety I went through.

I haven't really had a chance to update you.

Like what?

Well, when they've asked me to blow into the machine,

they said the legal limit's 0.8.

And I'm at 0.81.

It was getting late, and I didn't want you to worry

about where I was, you know?

♪

So you were pulled over by the police on suspicion

of DUI, and you were anxious about me

worrying about you being late?

Yeah.

Yeah, I don't think so, PK.

I'm telling you, all I wanted to do was call you.

But I couldn't call you because my hands were behind my back.

I could-- do you understand? I couldn't use the phone.

And I'm still handcuffed--

I'm handcuffed when I'm blowing the second time.

And this time, I've blown 0.73--

You're under the limit. I know.

- I'm well under the limit. - I know.

I decided, because I wasn't booked or such,

and they just gave me a ticket, that I wasn't going to

tell you the whole thing happened.

There's one thing and one thing only

that is extremely important to me, as you know,

in our marriage-- - Which is what?

- We do not lie to one another. - No, I wasn't--

- Period. - Baby--

Not a little lie, not a big lie--

- I decided-- - Not a white lie.

- I decided... - Wait a second.

That I wasn't telling you something.

Wait a second, PK.

There isn't a husband in the world, having--

you been through what you've been through,

that would have woken you up at 4:00 in the morning

to tell you that.

I didn't ask you to wake me up at--

And I didn't have to volunteer

the fact that I wasn't going to tell you immediately,

but I did.

♪

Are you kidding me?

The only reason why you did is because you

needed me to pick up your car.

Yes.

Count your blessings that I'm the one

who has to get the car out.

And so therefore, you had to tell me.

Because if I found out about this

when the press found out about it, buddy,

you'd have much bigger problems.

There's no one in this world I trust more than you.

If I think... - And you're right to.

For one second that you ever would lie to me,

you don't understand-- - Baby, this was--

You will crush me in two seconds.

No, I won't ever lie to you.

But I can sometimes delay telling you something

or pick my time.

If PK didn't take this seriously,

or he was casual about it, I would be far more annoyed.

But I could tell he had the scare of his life.

I think he's learned a lot of lessons.

Thank God that he's OK and he didn't hurt anybody.

Don't do it again.

No chance ever.

Because I was about to kill you.

[upbeat music]

♪

Diva, mermaid, and...

[whispering] Icy, icy, icy.

- That's 25 colors. - Yeah.

Well, we got the clip-in samples for you as well.

Oh, get out!

Oh, [BLEEP], that's healthy. - Mm-hmm.

- Look at that. It's thick. - Nice.

So glad that this is finally happening

after so many years of talking about this, you know?

[dog barking] - Who's here, Tiago?

Hi! - Hi.

- Hi, come in. - Hi!

- Hi! - How are you, baby?

Hi. Mwah, mwah, mwah, mwah.

Come on in.

I didn't know the gang was going to be here.

I mean, you know, we're having a little

pretty mess hair meeting.

You guys! [gasps]

- Take a peek. - So pretty.

I love these photos.

What great hair.

I know what it's like to have it all.

Victoria, can I have some-- do we have chamomile tea?

Yes, we do.

We're going to go into the real closet.

- Ah. - Oh, much better.

[laughs]

Amazing.

- Is that great? - It's wonderful.

- What is it, Cartier? - That's a power look, yeah.

What did you do to get it?

I did what every woman does to get it.

I'm good.

I'm going to work my ass off.

I'm going to get everything back.

♪ Lets go

♪ You want that boss life?

♪ Then come and see about it

♪ You want to talk to the boss? ♪

♪ Talk to me about it

Why hair?

Because I've worn it all--

every type of extension, clip-in,

ponytail, tape, keratin.

You name it, I've worn it onstage

for well over a decade.

I have a lot of knowledge just from having it in my head.

- But yeah. - So?

Very exciting.

New adventure-- huge.

I know, and on-brand, and a long time coming.

- Well-- - Major.

I'm going to leave you with this stuff.

Oh, yay yay.

Well, actually, Mikey, you stay.

- OK. - Jackie, I love you.

- I love you, baby. - Bye, Jack.

Bye, honey. Bye.

Bye, baby.

- Happy holidays. - Happy holidays.

- How was your holiday party? - How was our holiday party?

- I don't really remember. - I wouldn't think you would.

Our girl was sh--faced.

I mean, you were slurring your words.

Did you black out when you got home?

Yeah, I hit my head.

[sighs]

- Then I vomited. - Oh, sh--.

Yeah.

The holidays are hard for everybody.

And they were particularly hard for me this year.

Because you have great memories of your family and holidays

before, in the past, and when things were loving and great.

And now, it just-- it feels like it's desolate.

This is the fallout of everything that happened.

I don't want to be in this sad, depressing place.

I want to have a good time.

I want to feel good.

I want to have fun.

And so yeah, you know what?

I overdid it.

With the antidepressants, what happens is,

one drink is five times stronger, maybe more.

You know, having a cocktail has been

a routine part of socializing.

- I know. - Of course.

And it's hard to regulate and say

because of the medication I'm on,

I absolutely cannot touch this.

You were out of control.

Well, as someone that has known you for 12, almost 13

years, you are not a drinker.

But it's just these two things are not mixing.

- No. - Right.

Mikey is family to Erika.

And I'm probably the closest to Erika.

So Erika's in a place where she needs

to hear what the two of us have to say, period, end of story.

You can't cross that line because it's not good for you.

- It's reckless. - It is reckless.

Because you know what the truth is?

I could have hurt myself.

It can't-- it just can't happen like that.

You have gone through a tremendous trauma.

Your husband was not the guy that you

or any of us thought he was.

And you have had to deal with it

because you were married to him.

Yeah.

You went to this place because

you're in a lot of pain. - Oh, my God.

I come from experience.

I've seen it.

My sister died when I was six of a drug overdose.

Everyone knew she was in pain, but she

was not considered an addict.

She was medicating herself.

So I understand why Erika would want

to self-medicate, or numb herself, or try to have

a good time, or whatnot.

I understand it.

You have to stop this now because you

can't do it anymore. - Yeah.

It's just not who you are.

This is like, you know, hard to accept.

Because I've always prided myself

on always being so controlled.

I know.

I pushed it too far.

I did the wrong thing.

Sometimes, you know, it's hard to be really

honest with your friends.

But thank you for saying, hey, you know what?

You gotta stop that sh--.

We all hit rock bottom.

Everybody has a rock bottom moment.

I think that this is yours.

[sighs] Yeah.

Coming up.

I called, like, every ex-boyfriend

I think I've ever had. - What?

I've called everybody.

I was like, hello, I'm dying for company.

[upbeat music]

♪

Christmas wasn't as big as it normally is

because we have a lot of, like, older auntie and uncles

that were kind of concerned about COVID.

My family, we do Christmas Eve because it's

a more Christmassy thing.

And on Christmas Day, all our friends

who happen to be Jewish, they come here

and we do kind of Hanukkah meets Christmas dinner.

I think holidays bring you back

to how you celebrate with your family

and makes me reminisce about the good times.

To lose Lois, you know, in November,

and then have Thanksgiving and Christmas,

it's like, ugh, God.

But I mean, I was lucky to spend

every Christmas with her, you know,

to think of it in a positive way.

♪

Christmas was great.

We were in Vegas, just hanging out with the family,

doing the matching pajamas, dinners,

taking the kids out, just sweet family traditions.

I had COVID during Christmas.

Nothing better than spending Christmas Day alone.

And I bought myself a Christmas present.

And it was a ring.

I had to open something on Christmas morning.

2021 was a weird year.

So I'm thinking 2022, this is it.

♪

I'm doing the audio version of my book.

Have you ever listened to a book--

Never, never want to either. Books suck.

You're horrible.

[laughs] I mean, Jaid, you're a great student.

Why are you talking like that? - Because books suck.

I hate reading.

I can barely read.

Well, that's a problem.

[doorbell ringing]

Who is it?

Um, it's Santa.

[laughs]

- Hi. - Hi.

Whoo! You look so cute!

Thank you.

You have cooties?

No, I'm the Invisible Man.

How are you? - Hi.

- Jaid, say hi. - Hi.

- Hi, how are you? - Good, how are you?

Nice to see you.

I can still say Merry Christmas.

- Eh...maybe. - Yes.

It's not January 6th yet. We have two more days.

- Oh, is it January 6? - Yes.

When do you stop saying happy new year?

- It's-- - Like, after New Year.

I think you get the whole month.

I say the whole month. - I think the whole month.

Uh-uh. I think we have the day.

The whole month of January.

Oh, stop.

Come on, give us more than that.

- We need more time. - We need more time.

We need more time.

[laughter]

Sit wherever you-- - Did you change this up?

I did, just because of the tree.

Yeah.

Once the tree is gone, we'll go back to--

- Where do you want me to sit? - You can sit over there.

All right.

You know, 2022, I'm so hopeful.

But what I'm really looking forward to is,

I'm really trying to make a change within myself.

Well, I keep saying I'm going to be better.

- Better than what? - I don't know.

I lose my temper.

- Oh, Diana. - Well, yeah!

She had a holiday party.

I want to know about the house.

It's "gor-geous."

She had these big balls of light, like, everywhere,

like, outside.

And Asher sang.

His hair was flowing.

[laughs]

- Very Harry Styles. - Very Harry Styles.

Erika, once again, was more than tipsy, I'll just say.

We should look into it.

It's not like, oh, she's just letting loose.

Look, I'm not figuring anything out.

No, no, you don't do anything with her.

I'll-- - No, no, no.

- I'll take care of this one. - Yes, thank you.

That's going to go over well.

Excuse me, Erika?

I think that you have a problem.

I'm going to get my face eaten off.

So how have you been?

COVID and all, Christmas by yourself.

I'm like, anybody?

No, but first, the kids were with Christian.

And I knew that was a bother.

They were in Italy. I am alone.

I just thought, wow, this is my life as a single person.

I know.

And I got to fix that.

Yeah, but you're not going to fix that just because you were

alone and you were nervous.

No, no, but it made me also, like,

maybe put my guard down a little bit.

Maybe my shell can soften.

I think it's important for me to put myself out there.

Because it's not fun to be alone.

Might as well go on a date.

And also, what else do I have to do?

So did you talk to Christian?

Yeah.

Is he seeing anybody?

Yeah, he has a very serious girlfriend.

Oh, wow.

- Oh. - I know. I did not know.

You were all alone, and they were together.

Hearing it in retrospect, I was like, well,

that's even sadder for me.

I know.

Garcelle and I have bonded over being divorced,

single mothers who share custody with our ex-husbands.

And you kind of just want somebody to talk to

because we don't have men.

And that's what we respect in one another.

Gosh, the failure of it all.

Stop it right now.

What's the failure of it all, because we have

a marriage that got dissolved? Like--

Because you're so vulnerable when you're sick like that,

and you don't have anybody.

And how did you get yourself out of it?

Well, I called, like, every ex-boyfriend

I think I've ever had. - What?

- I pretty much did. I-- - Did you give somebody COVID?

No, I called them on the phone.

OK.

[laughter]

I was calling everybody.

I was like, hello, I'm dying for company.

[laughs]

You're like, hey.

And I'm like, oh, she's still alive.

[laughter]

No one called me.

Coming up.

He tells Mau everything immediately.

And he trusts him with his life.

He'd take a bullet for him, Kyle.

That must have been-- [laughs] Stop.

Take a bullet for him. [laughs]

[upbeat music]

♪

So what we're doing, looking for-- outfit for tonight?

Date number five.

Number five?

Yeah.

I thought it was only number four.

I can't keep up.

Listen, I've been busy.

I've been on five dates in the last year.

I like tall.

I like someone that has a job.

I like someone that's educated.

So I want to look relaxed, but not slutty.

Deal-breakers would be an affection

towards hoodies, ponytail, a white, unmarked van.

I think this is cute.

It looks a little Valentines-ish.

Your boyfriend, Michael, broke up, unfortunately.

- Yes. - What happened?

We're on a nice Valentine's weekend,

and he broke up with me.

- [gasps] On the weekend? - On the Valentine's weekend?

- Wow. - Yes.

That might point out that you aren't the best dater.

But I'm going to just try it again, see if maybe

I can be better at it.

No. What friend?

I have gay friends.

I'm not sure they want that benefit.

I'm telling you, the red is cute.

I know. I like the red.

But not with, like, black leather pants.

I think that says something that I don't want to convey.

I have to look sexier, or not sexy enough.

♪

Hello?

Hey, baby.

[dog barks] Hi, Stormy.

How you doing, mama?

How are you?

Cute glasses.

You drove here yourself?

- I did. - Can I get you a tea?

I don't want you having to run around.

We could just chat for a bit.

[in British accent] Oh, it'd be so hard for me

to run over and get you a tea. - Oh, my God. Oh, my goodness.

I'm just having a little spot of tea in honor of--

Oh, I'm loving this.

PK's home from London, I don't know.

I know, and PK being in London--

Every time I drink tea, I think about London.

I know. Well, it's true.

No, I mean, the headline kills me, Kyle,

that-- you know, it's so funny. - Which headline?

The headline about PK being arrested for a DUI.

It's just funny that it surfaces, like, weeks later.

You see those headlines, and you're like, oh, my gosh, PK.

I know.

When something goes out in the tabloids,

people that you know and people that you haven't

spoken to in however long, they love to send a message.

Now I'm going to have to talk about it with everyone.

Everyone's going to ask questions.

Let's relive this again and again and again

and again and again and-- oh, my goodness.

- By the way, he told Mau. - I know.

And Mau didn't say anything to me.

And then he's like, oh, I just haven't-- you know.

And I was like, I'm not believing this.

Didn't have a chance to-- - I know.

The situation.

He tells Mau everything immediately.

He literally does.

And he trusts him with, you know, with his life.

He'd take a bullet for you, Kyle.

That must have been stressful for--

[laughs] Stop.

Take a bullet for him. [laughs]

Oh, my God. - I can't.

It's really nice that Mau and PK

have this great relationship.

But clearly, something major happened.

And Mauricio never bothered to tell me about it.

What I'm not going to do is pretend

like it's not a big deal, or it didn't hurt my feelings.

Because it does.

Anyway, I'm going to sit over here.

What I was going to say is that, I mean, obviously,

because we always-- you know, we'll say,

never, never, never-- - [sighs]

So of course, I'd be, like, annoyed with Mau.

But the truth is like, I mean, they're big guys.

You think like-- you know, you really

wouldn't think having that little would get you

taken into the station. - I know, I know.

But that's just a reminder and a lesson to everyone.

It's so scary. - It is scary.

I mean, when I see a police drive by,

even if I haven't had a drink-- - I know.

I feel like I have a dead body in my trunk--

- [laughs] - That I'm hiding.

So I can only imagine if you're being pulled over,

and them questioning you-- I would have died.

I know.

Luckily, you know, as a mom, you know,

the newer generation, they just--

none of them drive, so-- - I know.

One less thing to worry about.

I'm grateful for that.

Well, that's another reason why

I love my family and friends.

I like when I go to bed at night,

I look 'em-- like, there's all my kids in the beds, and--

Oh, my God.

You know, even if Alexia-- because she's 25

and still lives at home.

Does she know that you check every single night

where these girls are?

They all know.

They check on me, too.

Oh, my God, Kyle.

This is the most beautiful relationship

you have with your kids. Oh, my God, I love it.

They put it on there. I did it.

Mau put it on there-- - Honey, I love that.

The whole family. And they all check.

Yeah. - I love that, honey.

Open doorway of communication is so important to me.

I tell my kids the same thing I tell my husband--

never lie to me.

No matter what it is, if you come and tell me,

we will always get through it.

And it will be so much better than if

I find out you lied to me. All right.

Now, what are you up to the rest of the day?

I have back-to-back meetings in a couple of hours.

And I have a bunch of things to do beforehand.

So I'm going to dash out, my love.

I'll see you. - Don't forget your phone.

Yeah, thank you.

Really funny, Kyle, because those

sunglasses that you liked, I can't

find them anywhere, Kyle.

- [laughs] - That's really funny.

It must be in your-- you probably put them in your bag.

I mean, I'm not above stealing your sunglasses.

I know. [laughter]

♪

How are you?

And this is, like, a pizza place, yeah?

- Yeah. - Oh, hi.

Hello.

All right, I'm going to take my mask off.

How are you? - Good to see you.

- Good to see you. - How are you?

Good to see you, too.

Sorry I'm so late.

Oh, that's all right.

My mother said to me, you really haven't ever dated.

Because I got married young.

But it's hard to date in 2022 when you're 50.

Can I help probably-- maybe grab us a drink or anything?

- I'll try the Pils. - Got it.

I'll do a paloma on the rocks.

On the rocks.

And then can I get a grapefruit juice on the side?

Absolutely. Thank you so much.

I'll get it started.

So I don't know about you, but I'm a plain pizza eater.

The spicy clams look kind of good.

Do you eat seafood?

I don't eat spicy anything.

- Really? - I know. I know.

So-- but your Indian background, I'm like, mm.

Because I like Indian food. - Yeah.

- But not spicy Indian food. - Yeah.

- Is that bad? - No.

I met Sanjit on the Bumble.

This is the one that I like!

Hi, Sanjit.

- Hi, my name is Erika. - Oh!

Excuse me, I actually like him.

- Oh! - Oh--

- Did you hear that? - You just said that out loud.

So after all the girls got in his face,

I've been on one date with Sanjit.

He's from Virginia, went to law school in New Orleans.

And also, he was on "Jeopardy!"

I do background checks on people that I date.

I don't have my glasses on, and so I can't--

Do you want mine?

Let me try these on.

Oh, wow. - They're 1.5's.

I think, yeah, we're similar. [laughs]

First date with him, I loved this date.

Because we went to a dive bar.

And he had a beer, and I had a glass of wine.

And we talked about movies and books.

College football seems to be our thing.

Check in, possibly any-- anything to start?

We're going to try the beets.

The beets, excellent. Thank you.

OK, thank you.

So a month later, second date, let's dive a little deeper.

You guys had the beets?

Oh, yeah, thank you.

Now I can really get to know him.

Well, I love the music scene out here.

I just saw The Go-Go's were playing at The Whisky.

[suspenseful music]

My foot is itching because I have neuropathy.

It's going to bother me.

Yeah.

It's the thing that I have that's bothering me right now.

Yeah.

I know, I love music.

I love live music.

I loved garage bands.

Like, for me growing up-- because I grew up in the '80s.

Like, that punk scene.

The Clash and the Sex Pistols--

The Clash, so good.

Those were the days, man.

I don't know what I'm looking for.

I don't think I'm looking for marriage.

So now, maybe I just want a boyfriend.

Somebody who'll put up with me.

I'm just giving you the insider's point of view

so that you can decide if you want a third date or not.

[laughs]

You were like, no, I don't.

[laughs]

Coming up.

Sutton is also the master of her own disaster.

You don't have to cover for her all the time.

She knows what she's doing.

[upbeat music]

♪

- Ha ha! Love it. - How are you?

I love it.

- Hi. - How are you?

I'm good.

- Happy New Year. - Happy New Year.

- This is fabulous. - Thank you.

- Nice to see you. - Nice to see you, too.

- Isn't this cool? - I love it.

It feels like New York a little bit.

- So what's going on? - Hi, what's going on?

New year.

How's dating life?

Sex life is better than dating life.

Oh? That's fantastic.

I agree. I'm not really dating.

I mean, what am I, going to go hold hands with someone

at the restaurant? - How are you doing, ladies?

- Hey, how are you? - Hi.

Happy New Year. My name is Glory.

Happy New Year.

Welcome to Grandmaster Recorders.

- Thank you so much. - Here's our menus.

- I will have Casamigo neat. - Neat? Sure.

- Please? - OK.

Can I have just a chamomile tea with some honey?

So unfortunately, we actually don't

do the hot drinks up here.

That's the only thing. - Oh, OK, hold on--

We do have--

Let me-- what cognac do you have up here?

Let me check for you. I'll go check for you.

Yeah, just something good.

[laughs] I've never been tea or cognac.

Shirley Temple, perhaps?

Water?

- And here are your drinks. - Thank you.

- Awesome, thank you. - Here's to you.

Cheers. Happy New Year.

Thank you. Happy New Year to you too.

- You're welcome. - Prosperity.

Yes.

So how are you?

- I'm OK. - Yeah?

Last couple of times I saw you, you were a little tipsy.

Ah! - Well, I wasn't tipsy.

I was blacked out. - OK.

[laughs] I was starting off slow.

No, but I appreciate you trying to, like, be gentle.

But it wasn't, it was blacked out.

And why?

Medicine, and thinking I could drink on it,

just like this. - Girl--

But I wanted to have a good time.

Everybody wants to have fun.

And you, after last year, I get it.

- Deserve a little bit of fun. - I do.

Yeah, but it gets away from me.

But you don't want to get to a point where

we're all worried about you, and it looks

a little messy and sloppy.

Well, you know who came to my house

to basically let me have it and call me on the carpet,

was Lisa Rinna. - Did she?

- Hell yeah, she did. - Good.

Obviously, I'm struggling.

Lost the home, lost the husband, lost all the stuff.

Nobody really tells you how to...

- Rebuild. - Rebuild.

That's a lot of pressure, Garcelle.

But something in my gut tells me I'll be all right,

you know?

Oh, you're going to be all right.

But there are moments where I'm like, oh, sh--.

Oh, sh--! - Yeah.

You know, I guess just like everyone else.

Just like everyone else.

I think the first step is recognizing

that you have a problem.

And I think she's doing that.

So I believe her, and I'm glad to see that she is owning it.

And so hopefully, she will.

Because so much of my life has been ripped away,

it's almost like I have a fresh set of eyes.

Yeah.

OK, now that your eyes are open,

what are you seeing about our friend group?

Are you seeing anything that you hadn't seen?

I'm glad you have Sheree

because I think Sutton is a liability for you.

- Really? - Yes.

Why does everybody come down on her?

Because she's unpredictable in some ways.

It's very strange for Erika to say

that Sutton could be a liability to me,

but when in Mexico, they were buddies.

We don't need to be making them comfortable.

It's between us. Right. - Yeah.

We get each other in a way that people don't understand.

You start, she always pushes everybody.

She pushes--

The bottom line is, Erika is a liability

walking around every day.

Is there a more scandalous woman in America

today than Erika Jayne?

I really wish everybody would just kind of, like,

lay off Sutton for a minute.

Like, do something else.

But I will say this--

Sutton is also the master of her own disaster.

I know she's your friend.

No, she is definitely my friend.

But I also feel like--

You don't have to cover for her all the time.

I don't.

But I think that you almost felt and in some ways,

responsible to protect her.

She's a big girl.

She knows what she's doing.

Next time on "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills."

It is kind of fun for me to, like, torture you.

[laughs] Is it? - OK.

- People think I'm such a - ---ing bitch, don't they?

You are.

I saw Erika.

And she said I'm not allowed to drink when I'm on these meds.

And she fell and hit her head.

- Wait, what? What? - Yes!

I told you I sent the wrong text to the wrong person,

thanking them for some good dick.

And he was like, what are you talking about?

I'm trying to give you some. [laughter]

We're having a little wine tasting tomorrow,

a little Rinna rosé. - Rinna rosé?

It's actually finally happening.

- What is this, honey? - This is the Brut.

Brut. Oh. God, that is good.

What's in this sh--?

You talk out of both sides of your mouth.

- Well, so do you. - No, I don't.

And you know what? [BLEEP] you.

I will ----ing hunt you down!

[gasps]