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JESSE: Who am I?

Who will I become?

(SEAGULLS CAWING) What does it all mean?

It's what I'm supposed to be asking, right?

But, right now,

I'd do anything for the answer to just one question.

"Are you proud of me?"

Big day tomorrow, Dad.

Your son is off to college.

I've still got morning wood, so this better be fucking worth it.

JESSE: But that's tomorrow.

It's a little bit early, Jesse. What's going on?

(SIGHS)

What would make this day perfect?

OSCAR: What the fuck you talking about?

I'm talking about a perfect day.

What would it look like?

Man, I just want to drink it in.

No, you fucks.

I mean, I literally, I just like, uh, I wanna start drinking

and I don't wanna stop until I'm just knee-deep in some forbidden pussy.

Fair enough, I can make that happen.

The drinking part.

How about you?

I got to tell her.

Be bold, brother.

You've got nothing to lose.

My oldest and dearest friend,

what do you want?

What will make our last day together perfect?

Nothing, man.

I want nothing.

Today, boys,

everything's possible.

I'm still confused why this circle jerk couldn't wait till the sun came up.

Take it easy. My mom's making breakfast.

Is she making that thing... With that thing... Jesse!

Jesse, wait. JESSE: Yeah, yeah, she's making your thing.

(ALL LAUGHING)

Have you not planned this out at all?

I was just saying, you've had four years to do this.

Are we good, we all done?

Amazing. Good.

Give this to me. BOBBY: No, no, no, no.

We've got it. You've done enough.

Thank you, Bobby. Thank you.

Oh, I'm so sorry. Where are my manners?

Yeah, where are your manners?

Up your ass...

I'm sorry, Diane. DIANE: I'll live.

You look beautiful today. DIANE: Thank you.

Smooth. OSCAR: Your mom...

AIDEN: Whatever... Shut up. OSCAR: Your mom loves you.

Is Lily coming over?

Yeah, in a bit.

Have you decided what you gonna do? (EXHALES)

No.

I don't know.

I mean,

Lily is... I know.

But... I mean, isn't college supposed to be about new experiences?

Sure.

What do you think I should do?

Well, I could tell you but I don't think you're gonna like it.

Try me.

You should follow your heart.

Oh, thank you, very helpful.

Oh, that's my job.

Follow your heart.

Nan and Pop were high school sweethearts, right? Hmm-mmm.

Yup, each other's one and only.

What was their secret?

Ah, she was his calm.

That's it?

That is it.

Pop was a thinker, like you.

And when those wheels would start spinning in the middle of the night

and he couldn't get back to sleep,

the only thing that would get him there

would be the touch of Nan's hand.

Right on his back, or his arm, out like a light.

She was his calm.

I mean it.

You follow that heart of yours,

it will tell you when you've found your match.

Trust me.

You must miss him so much.

I see him every day.

Go, go have fun.

(MUSIC PLAYING)

JESSE: How you doing? Hi.

What's going on? Hey, douchebag.

All right, well, I believe we have diem to carpe.

Cheers.

Why would you do that? No!

May we?

Oh, not without a drink, I'm afraid.

Rules are rules.

Hey, can you be a doll and fetch me two beers?

Can you be a doll and lick my nut sack?

Oh, my God.

Who talks like that?

Want a beer? Oh! Come on!

(GIGGLES)

Thank you so much.

It helps.

Have a good time!

Thanks.

All right, you guys are going down.

JESSE: Oh-ho-ho, boys against girls.

How exciting.

Okay. Hmm. Here you go.

I got this. You got it.

Thank you. You're welcome.

You're going down. Hmm.

Do that strut.

(METAL CLINKING)

Good luck.

Thank you. Oh, and, uh...

LILY: Ha-ha!

(LAUGHS) Taken!

That was just cruel.

Emily.

Five, four, three, two, mwah, one.

Ha-ha.

SERENA: You are crazy. (LAUGHS)

Wow!

You, uh, care to share?

I make a wish.

Every time I throw, I... It's like blowing an eyelash.

That's my secret trick.

Helps me concentrate.

JESSE: Here's the problem with love.

Even for us hopeless suckers who want it,

nothing beats the "falling in love" part.

How the littlest looks can send shivers down your spine.

How you can spend days imagining what her lips must feel like.

How soft her skin must be.

But see, that's the problem with love.

Once you fall in love, the "falling in love" part is over.

Speaking of ass sucking, which one do you want?

Are you serious?

Don't you think Jen and Emily know you a bit too well?

What the fuck is that supposed to mean?

Means they know you're a disgusting fucking pig.

Well, what's your point?

Whatever, man, this is your last shot.

Speak now or forever hold your peace.

Yeah, I'll take my chances.

Well, they're both mine then, I guess.

JESSE: Hi, Aiden.

Hi, buddy.

That's my boy!

Must have been a hell of a wish.

Yeah.

Looks like fun.

JEN: Horseshoes?

Yeah.

Knock yourself out.

I suppose it's too much to ask that you at least pretend

like you want to spend your last day with us?

Pretending really isn't in my DNA.

No, it is not.

You know it's not you guys.

It's just...

I'm ready.

Ready to get outta here.

Ready for tomorrow.

LILY: Yes!

Tomorrow's coming.

You might as well enjoy yourself in the meantime.

(INDISTINCT CONVERSATION)

You're not thinking what I think you're thinking?

(CHUCKLING)

Oh.

OSCAR: Oh, she's doing that thing.

She's doing that... I fuckin' love it when they do that thing.

They know that we love it when they do that thing, right? I mean, they must.

That's probably exactly why they do it, duh.

What do you think they're talking about?

You need to fuckin' smoke some more weed, dude.

Don't you fucking say it. Don't!

Calm down. OSCAR: Why?

You're such a dick, dude.

You're so lucky you didn't tell me to relax.

I fuckin' hate it when people tell me to relax.

I absolutely hate it.

It's like, who do you think you are comin' in

to Oscar's space and fuckin' with my vibe.

Who gave you that right? I didn't.

I didn't do that. Tell me to relax.

You fucking relax.

Phew. Seriously, though, what do you think they're talking about?

You think they're talking about us? Yeah, sure.

Wow.

Hey, Oscar.

What's up, brother?

Fuckin' relax.

It's a fight, fucker. Ow, ow, ow, ow!

LILY: Here, bitch. Ugh!

Idiots. Em.

Yeah? Here you go.

Look at these guys, they're like walking hormones.

They are only good for one thing,

which conveniently for me,

is the only thing that I want from them.

As you go and suck your bottle.

(LAUGHS)

I think they've got a bit more to offer than that.

(LAUGHS)

May be some do.

May be.

Well, I can't be bothered to sift through all your friends, who's got the time?

Do you think guys are gonna be any better in college?

I hope not. I like them just the way they are. Uncomplicated.

OSCAR: Nipple placement is critical.

Hey, guys.

You and Serena were, like, having a pretty good time.

Fuck, it's horseshoes. What do you want me to say?

Baby steps, brother. Baby steps.

I don't know, man.

What?

Man, you and Bobby, dude, you just don't get it.

And you do, Mr. Take-Your- Pick-Between-Two-Girls- Who-Can't-Fucking-Stand-You?

That doesn't matter.

Yeah, it does. No, it do...

If any of us want to bang girls for more sexual experience before college,

it has to be today.

I'm talking all of us.

All of us and them.

Girls are not that different.

Yeah, they are. Yeah, they are.

No, they're not. No, no. No they're not.

I mean, the data is pretty much on our side.

OSCAR: You want some data? Yeah.

Aiden, how much do you love blowjobs? What?

What? I dunno.

You... You don't know?

I mean, it's a lot. It's good.

Fuck, man. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, of course it's great!

OSCAR: On a scale from one to ten,

how hot does a girl have to be for you to let her blow you?

Ah, dude, I don't know. I haven't really, like, put a lot of thought into it.

So fuckin' think about it, man!

Let's take out the sevens, the eights, the nines and the tens

'cause they're in, right?

So would you let a six blow you?

Depends. On what?

On the circumstances. Oh!

You fucking me, man! No, it's important!

Okay, fine, yeah, sixes are in, all right?

I'd let a six blow me.

How kind of you. How about a five?

Yeah, fine, fives, whatever.

Okay, so we're actually getting somewhere now.

Would you let a four blow you?

Jessica Dooley is a four.

On her best day. No, no!

You don't even... Don't even start with that bullshit.

No, stop. Where are we? We're at three now?

Okay, take it easy.

Aiden, like every other guy in the planet, would

let just about any girl with a pulse give him a blowjob.

So what, for the love of God, is your point?

I'm getting there, Jesse.

Bobby, on a scale from one to ten,

just on looks, what's Aiden?

He's like a 8.5.

Aw, thanks, man. Okay, so what am I?

You? Yeah.

You're a three.

Ha! You're a fuckin' asshole.

No, you're like a seven. No, you already said it, no. Okay.

I don't know where you're going with this.

I know that girls are different.

Okay, but they are not that different.

They are just as sexually curious as we are.

You don't think that a girl loves the feeling

of our tongues on their pussies

as much as we love the feeling of her mouth on our cocks?

Of course, they do.

Come on, dude! We are all young!

You know, we are curious and we're sexual

and we want to investigate and explore and rip off and unzip and

explode everywhere! Watch where you're exploding.

So here's your data, all right?

Guys will down for a three, at least, right?

Serena's getting an eight and a half.

Girls are different but think about this.

Are they five and a half points different?

I don't think so.

That's why I think Aiden is already in there.

And the truth is, that they are not even four points different.

So that means that I have a shot.

So yeah. Go ahead and put that data in your pipe and suck it.

Okay. All right.

Look at them.

I mean, they look like just simple creatures to me.

Ten counts says they're talking about periods and push-up bras.

Jen's easy.

Ten years from now, a high-powered attorney.

I like that.

SERENA: Yeah, she'll be chewing up men for a living.

And spitting them out. Argh!

What about kids?

What about them? Oh.

Do you think you'll ever want them?

Em, I am one.

I'm sure as hell not thinking about having one.

LILY: Okay, Serena's turn.

EMILY: Oh, you're a writer.

Ah, awesome. Thank you.

What about Em?

That... That is also easy. President of Sierra Club.

President of the Peace Corps.

President of the United States.

EMILY: Okay, okay. You guys are nuts. LILY: We're not nuts.

You're the most brilliant girl I've ever met.

And you won Most Likely To Succeed.

And yearbooks do not lie.

Wait, Em... Em is editor of the yearbook.

How do we know that she didn't rig it?

Because I won Most Likely To Succeed?

Wait, what's that mean? EMILY: Oh, come on.

No, everybody knows that Most Likely To Succeed

is just code for biggest nerd.

LILY: Em, no. No, no, no, no, no. No it's not.

It's not code for anything. It means that people believe in you.

Says the girl who won Best Body. Aw!

Come on, Em.

So I have a good body, big fuckin' what?

It is not something to take for granted, trust me.

Neither is people thinking that you're smart, trust me.

SERENA: Okay, Lily's turn.

Uh, please. I'm a lost cause.

SERENA: Aw!

JEN: I am also a lost cause.

(BOTH LAUGH) JEN: Kiss my ass!

Lily, wait for me!

(INAUDIBLE)

JESSE: There's still so much I wish I could ask you.

Show you, share with you.

It doesn't get any better than this.

It's funny how that thought comforts me

and scares the shit out of me at the same time.

On one hand, I'm so grateful

for these guys.

For Lily, for this day, for this moment.

On the other hand, I've got this gut feeling

it's only going to get harder from here on out.

How could it not?

Look at us.

This has gotta be the easy part, right?

What's it going to be like when this little adventure that we're on

takes some real twists and turns?

Settle an argument for me.

May I?

Oh. (GIGGLES)

Is Jen right?

She really does think all guys are assholes.

She's probably right. (LAUGHS)

Wow.

I don't think you're an asshole.

May be I'm not like other guys.

Or maybe assholes are just assholes

and you are like most guys.

Oh, so I am like most guys?

(LAUGHS) No, that's not what I meant.

I... I'm kidding.

So do you think you're ready?

For what?

Leaving home.

College, all of it.

As ready as I'll ever be, right?

That is just it.

I don't think I'm as ready as I could have been.

What do you mean?

Well, I just... I think there are some things

I could have or should have done before going.

Like what?

I don't know.

Like...

Like dated more.

Maybe I should have dated more.

Em, you have plenty of time for that.

Plus, how may high school idiots can you date anyway?

I wondered though if maybe dating more in high school

would have made me better at dating in college.

"Better at dating?" (LAUGHS) Sure.

It takes practice, right?

It gets better with practice, right? Em,

you don't need to practice dating.

Well, it's easy for you to say.

I'm sure you've done all the dating that you wanted.

Don't be so sure.

You're saying...

You're saying there's someone that you wanted to date, but didn't?

Are you nuts, of course.

Ah, dude, thank you so much. OSCAR: Wait, did he make it?

AIDEN: So sweet. OSCAR: No, no, no.

JESSE: He almost made it.

It was a great fuckin' effort.

OSCAR: Almost only counts in horseshoes and Junior High sex, right, Jen?

I'm sorry, buddy.

I know I promised but some things just have to be shared.

Yes, they do.

Do they?

What does that mean? No, don't you dare.

Oh, screw that.

Dare away.

What? Come on, Em.

Some things have to be shared.

No, seriously. I will kill you.

You will thank me. No, no.

It's time for the cat to be out of that bag.

Maybe these guys can help you.

No, no, no, I don't know about this, you guys.

JEN: I'm with Lily on this one.

No, I do not care who you're with, not another word.

Not another word.

Sorry, Em. Should be.

OSCAR: What...

LILY: Sorry. What, wait, no. That's it?

Yeah. That's bullshit.

Actually, I mean...

I think it's really impressive.

Shut up. No, no, no, no. Think about it.

I mean, guys would never let each other off the hook like that.

Girls are so much sweeter.

Okay, that's bullshit, and sexist.

AIDEN: What are you talking about? EMILY: Hmm-mmm. Sexist.

What? How is that sexist? I was trying to be nice.

Anytime you make a generalization based on gender, that's sexist.

Argh! Blow me, dyke.

You fucking asshole! SERENA: Oscar!

OSCAR: What... You think all guys are assholes, so...

Yeah, I do because they are, Oscar.

Okay, and is that not, you know, sexist, Jen?

I mean, okay, I guess I clearly don't understand women.

I mean, it's not like I said chicks are more manipulative or controlling.

I know you're trying to be complimentary

but really you're just putting all of us in a box.

Oh, fucking, just shoot me in the face, dude. Okay.

No. You know what, okay, hold on.

Is it sexist to say that men are physically stronger than women?

Yeah. No, it's not. It's a fact.

And is it sexist to say that men are smarter than women?

No, 'cause you guys are dumb.

LILY: Oh, my God! And that's a fact too.

Yeah. LILY: You've got to go.

Jen is right. You're an asshole.

(GIRLS LAUGH)

What? Okay, so you agree with them?

No, actually, I don't.

Doesn't mean we can't have a civilized conversation about it.

EMILY: Thank you, Jesse. LILY: Yes.

But you don't agree with me,

you think it's okay to put all this in a box?

Jesse?

Okay, okay, ah... (GIRLS LAUGH)

You know what this is?

Mmm-mmm. Yes.

A molding of Lily's clitoris.

Oh, wow. EMILY: Oh, my God!

Look at it though. No, it's a goddess.

LILY: You actually never shock me. It's a goddess.

That was too far.

Well, that doesn't shock me either... It's a goddess.

Shh. ...you fucking feminist hippie.

JESSE: So do you like it?

Yeah. I love it. You know that.

I think it's really... It's beautiful!

Thank you. Yeah.

So let me ask you.

Why is the goddess beautiful?

JEN: What do you mean? JESSE: What makes it beautiful?

Uh, well, what are you, a fuckin lawyer all of a sudden?

No, no, I just...

I just think it's a shame we're all getting so caught up

in saying and doing all the right things

that we can't even say what's beautiful about something.

Why do I wear her around my neck?

Why?

Because she is beautiful.

She's calm.

She's wise.

She's gentle.

She's fair, she's nurturing, she's powerful.

She's mysterious, she's adventurous,

she's fearless. She's a protector.

And, yes, she is sweet.

If you think that's sexist, so be it.

I think it's pretty damn sexy.

So what? A guy can't be all those things?

Man, if you think that's what I'm trying to say...

I strive to be all those things.

These are qualities I admire.

I think you are all of those things.

That's why I love you.

So I guess you loved me for just the other reasons.

Who says I love you.

I need a beer. Oh, Bobby!

Seriously, goddammit.

Dude, you're not going to fucking ruin my buzz today.

You need to figure your shit out.

I don't get it, like...

So we're not going to the same school.

You and me aren't. Aiden and I aren't.

What? OSCAR: It's not the same.

It's not.

Ever since the beginning it's always been you and Bobby.

It was Jesse and Bobby. Jesse and Bobby.

It's always been Jesse and Bobby.

You guys won Best Couple in the yearbook, for Christ's sakes.

What? AIDEN: What?

What? What?

You and Bobby

got the most votes

for best couple

but Miss Obed knew you guys weren't actually a real couple

so she gave it to the runner-up.

LILY: Oh, my God. Are you being serious?

Yeah. Wait a second.

I thought Jesse and Lily won Best Couple.

Not exactly.

He's being a bit sensitive, isn't he?

So we aren't going to the same school. None of us are.

But that doesn't mean... No, no, no, no.

Did you and I win Best Couple?

No, we did not. So why're you telling me?

This a private party?

Let me ask you something.

Why are you taking this thing so hard?

How am I supposed to take it when my best friend

tells me he doesn't wanna hang out anymore?

What... Do you think that's what I'm saying? Aren't you?

We won Best Couple.

What?

Apparently,

according to Emily, you and I

got the most votes for Best Couple.

Isn't that something?

Sure, we deserved it.

Jesse and Bobby.

Jesse and Bobby.

Who's better than us?

I think

you might just be the best "best friend."

So why did you change your mind?

We would have an absolute blast

if we went to school together.

Jesse and Bobby.

I fucking love Jesse and Bobby.

It's who I am.

I'm not going to a different school

'cause I don't want to hang out anymore.

I'm going

because I gotta know who Jesse is

without Jesse and Bobby.

I'm gonna go check on Lily.

Wanna head back?

I'll head over in a bit.

All right.

Anybody wanna go on a walk?

(WHISPERING) Go on a fucking walk.

Go on a walk.

I don't want to... Jesus, come on, man.

Fine.

You're, um...

You're going to Boulder, right? Mmm-hmm.

It's awesome. It should be... Be really fun.

Mmm-hmm.

It's funny, we haven't really hung out that much.

What do you mean? We're always together.

I guess. I mean...

Uh...

I mean, we're together 'cause

we have the same friends, you know.

But, we never really...

Talk, or, you know, hang out.

All right, I'll tell you what?

Let's... Let's make up for that right now.

(CHUCKLES) Okay, uh...

Yeah, sure.

All right. Well, fire away. Ask me anything.

Uh...

Fire away. Okay. Uh...

Did you like high school?

Yes.

I mean, yeah.

I don't know. I...

Maybe. Ask me again in 10 years.

Okay.

Okay, my turn. Okay.

Favorite five?

Favorite what?

Favorite five. The essentials.

Favorite color. Uh-huh.

Favorite food. Okay.

Favorite song. Favorite movie. Favorite position.

You're just a little bit crazy, aren't you?

Well, aren't we all?

Well?

Uh...

Okay, all right.

So it's color first, right?

Mmm-hmm. Okay, color.

That's easy. Umm...

How about...

(GASPS)

(BOTH LAUGHING)

I'm gonna go

right there.

Sunset-y blue.

Sunset-y blue? Yeah.

I didn't realize that was a color.

Ah, see, it's not just a color, all right.

It's my favorite color. Oh.

Happens every day.

That's you and me, you know.

We happen every day.

Here comes the "but."

But... I knew it.

What do you know?

Not much.

I know

we're both thinking the same thing.

Oh. What's that?

That maybe

this is supposed to be our last sunset together.

Our last

magical, unforgettable sunset.

What do we do?

I don't know.

Well, we're kinda running out of time here.

Let's make a list.

What... Are you serious?

Pros and cons of breaking-up. Uh-huh.

We're both thinking the same thing.

So, just, we'll put it out there.

Put it out there.

And...

Let's get them out there. Let's just...

Okay, pros for breaking-up. Let's go.

Pros for breaking-up.

Pro.

We... We wouldn't have to do the long distance thing.

I mean...

People say it's brutal. Yeah.

And we wouldn't have to be that pathetic freshmen,

waiting around for our boyfriend or girlfriend

when everyone else is out experiencing new things.

Right. Cool things.

Yeah.

You can kiss as many guys as you wanted.

And you can kiss as many girls as you wanted.

Yeah.

Uh, in fact, you could do whatever you wanted.

You could do whatever you wanted.

It's pretty enticing.

Yeah, it is.

Okay, cons for breaking-up.

I've got this breathtaking girl.

And I've got this beautiful boy.

And I'd miss her like crazy.

I'd miss him like crazy.

While I was out experiencing all these new things,

I feel like I just

want to be in my pathetic dorm room.

Pathetically waiting for my girlfriend to show up.

Yeah, I can see myself being pretty

pathetic.

So?

So?

(MUSIC PLAYING)

I wish it didn't have to end.

Who says it has to?

(SIGHS) To today, boys.

Everything is possible.

Stay in shape forever, man.

(MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING)

EMILY: You know how in every movie about space

someone always asks something like,

um,

"Do you ever wonder

"somewhere out there, in the sky

"if there are people

"looking up at us just like we're looking up at them?"

I love that.

Like, maybe

there are eight other friends

out there just like us

looking up at the Earth.

I doubt it.

I don't know.

I mean, there's an infinite amount of space out there, right?

Uh, infinity...

It's so hard to wrap your brain around it.

It's like that monkey.

(ALL CHUCKLE)

What monkey?

(LAUGHING) (DOORBELL RINGS)

(KNOCKING ON DOOR) You know, it's... It's the, uh...

It's the theory, right?

Like you... If you put a monkey

in front of a typewriter... Excuse me.

AIDEN: ...for infinity, eventually... Okay, thanks.

...it's going to write Hamlet.

That's ridiculous.

I don't buy that.

I don't know what there is to buy.

BOBBY: A monkey's not going to type Hamlet.

What, it's gonna get every letter perfectly in the right order

including all the capitals and punctuation?

Eventually, yeah.

BOBBY: You guys are fucking crazy. There's no way...

We're not crazy.

You just don't understand the meaning of infinity.

Okay, all right. All right. Emily, I'm sorry. Uh...

Before my friends rudely interrupted you

about some childish genius monkey typer thing,

you were...

You were pondering life on other planets.

My whole life,

I've loved knowing that I have

the coolest,

best friends in the world.

Thank you. But... BOBBY: Of course.

We're going to college.

For four years.

At least. (CHUCKLES)

EMILY: At least.

So like those people looking up at the stars,

I wonder if I'll find

another you.

Or another Lily.

Or another Serena.

Kinda hope I do.

You're right, it's weird.

We're gonna have a whole new group of friends.

New everything.

New beds.

I love my bed.

Yeah, a lot of guys do.

(ALL LAUGHING)

New chill spots. New guys.

New girls. Any girls.

New rules.

No rules.

No curfew.

No fucking curfew.

No sneaking out.

Or in. Or in.

No parents.

No parents.

No family.

It's beautiful, isn't it?

Just all of us sitting here together.

Quiet.

Can't help wondering what you guys are thinking about right now.

We were probably always

thinking the same thing, right?

Not the exact same thing,

but similar.

Probably thinking about how amazing today was.

Jesse, man.

Thank you for this day.

You're probably all thinking about tomorrow.

Venturing off to God knows where and what.

But that's tomorrow.

You know, that's over there.

And before tomorrow happens,

and the day after that, and the day after that,

all we have is right here.

Amen, brother.

OSCAR: Right.

Everything that... That matters

is right here.

I mean, think about that.

While you guys are thinking about that,

I want you to think about one more thing.

And this is actually mainly just to

Jen and/or Emily.

I want you to think about this.

And I mean this more than anything

I have ever said before.

I am

pretty amazing at eating pussy.

Okay, no. All right. Okay. Hold it.

That might have come out a little wrong. That's...

I'm not... I'm just saying

I'm a generous lover.

Like, I enjoy giving back...

No. ...to the people.

What?

What?

No... All right. Okay.

(STUTTERING) Aiden...

We'll go back to the infinity monkey thing.

Infinity? You want to talk about that now?

Emily story.

Tell me the Emily story. EMILY: Oh.

You have to tell me the Emily story.

No. Not a chance.

Come on. I will literally do anything for you, Emily.

Emily. Emily. I will do anything for you.

Just let Lily tell the story, please.

JESSE: Come on, throw him a bone.

Anything?

Anything.

You'll thank me for it. Trust me.

I'm gonna need another beer. (SERENA GASPS)

Fucking right!

EMILY: You better be a man of your word.

So I can?

Em?

No, stop. I can't do it.

No. What? No.

Okay, you're fucking killing me right now.

Go. Go.

Em wears pads.

Yeah, like for her

period or whatever? I mean, so what?

(SOFTLY) Oh, my God.

See, this is what I'm talking about. That's all they fucking do.

They just talk about tampons and shit.

The fact that she wears pads in meaningless.

Okay, so the deal if off. It's fine.

But why she wears pads... Oh, my God.

They don't fit!

They don't fit. I can't wear tampons because I can't get them in.

What...

I mean, that's...

That's pretty cool. 'Cause like...

I mean, that must mean you're really

tight.

Which is super dope.

Right?

Thank you, but it is definitely not dope.

I don't mean to be graphic, but...

Have you...

You all, like, tried to help?

Yeah, we like, tried one day.

That's what girlfriends are for.

EMILY: I cannot believe we're having this conversation.

I have yet to conduct a very thorough search party.

I can help.

LILY: Of course you can.

OSCAR: I'm dead serious.

I can help.

Everybody should know their bodies inside and out.

Found your purpose in life.

Dude, I think you're absolutely right.

I will conduct my own search party

whenever I damn please. SERENA: Yeah!

Aye, aye, captain.

Buried gold in them there waters.

(ALL LAUGHING)

Just waiting to be found.

Oh, shit.

Speaking of finding gold.

Forgot I had these.

I was going to propose a little

sunset trip.

What do you think? Too late.

Uh, I'm good, brother.

Don't think I can be any happier.

All right guys, no worries.

I'll, um...

I'll do it with you.

Why not?

Right. Yeah. Sure, of course.

JEN: (WHISPERING) What is she doing?

I...

You've obviously never rolled with Aiden before.

Shut up. SERENA: What? What's up?

I'd like to say a little something

before taking it.

I'm more ceremonial.

Does that sound weird?

It sounds nice.

Okay.

You guys will be missed.

But, with us in spirit.

Yes, we are.

Or we will.

I don't want to get too

carried away or anything but, uh...

Thank you for joining me.

Don't I get to say something?

(GIRLS LAUGH)

Yeah, sorry.

(SIGHS)

Sorry, Emily.

You can look at all the planets,

or colleges, that you like,

but you will never find what we have.

You three

are my everything.

I love you guys.

I love you.

Thank you for letting me join you.

There's no turning back now.

JESSE: I'm jealous.

This is my favorite part.

Why? What do you mean?

The sweet anticipation.

Exactly.

OSCAR: I don't know about that. I actually think

the most fun part about it is that

it gives me just insane staminance.

Are you fucking serious?

I literally... I can't come on it.

SERENA: Oh, thank you for that. I can't.

Staminance?

(GIRLS SNIGGER)

Staminance, yeah.

SERENA: Okay. OSCAR: What?

You're over buzzed.

OSCAR: Why am I...

How is that hopeless? That's staminance.

The fuck?

BOBBY: Emily asked if I'm ready.

Hell, no.

I mean,

throw a whole bunch of scared shitless, confused kids

into a brand new world.

And, oh, yeah, let's make sure they're totally alone.

I mean, whose fucking great idea was that?

That's why I'm taking it so hard.

I'm scared too.

Yeah, we all are.

You're scared?

Of course.

Never seen you scared.

You're the toughest girl know.

Really?

Yeah.

I always assumed you thought I was kind of a nerd?

A nerd?

I voted you Most Likely To Succeed. We all did.

I... I think we're all just nervous about

leaving home and starting something new.

But... JEN: But

that's also the coolest part about it.

LILY: Exactly.

JEN: The thing that makes it terrifying,

is the same thing that makes it fucking awesome.

I mean, we get to get out of here

and start all over.

That's just it, though.

I really like this.

I really liked it here.

Shit, I...

I love this.

We all do.

Speak for yourself.

LILY: We all do. Even Jen.

But this isn't going anywhere.

We are.

BOBBY: All I know,

or knew, anyway...

But it seemed a little less horrible with my best friend there.

Maybe that makes me a coward.

JESSE: It's a precious and fragile thing,

someone counting on you.

You were always there for everyone, Dad.

Oscar.

(OSCAR GROANS) Oscar...

JESSE: Weren't you afraid of letting them down?

Hmm? BOBBY: Let me get another.

No.

There's... There aren't... There's no more, man.

Nope. Gone. All right.

I'm gonna get some more.

OSCAR: You should grab me one.

OSCAR: What's up? JEN: So, what's up?

Can I at least sit on the couch?

(JEN CHUCKLES)

JESSE: I would give my life for these guys.

But that's easy to say, isn't it?

JEN: Don't get too close, Oscar.

(JEN AND OSCAR SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)

JEN: I don't know what you're about to do to me.

JESSE: If I'm being honest,

I'm not sure I'd do a great job

of actually putting their lives,

their hopes and dreams before mine.

Am I supposed to?

Did you?

LILY: I guess

my brain knows.

But my heart still sees

my parents like I did when I was a little kid

and I kind of love that.

Really?

I'm jealous.

Wait, what're we talking about here, what?

The punch-the-gut moment

when you realize your parents are

flawed and screwed up human beings

just like everybody else.

It's brutal.

It's really like a moment though?

I feel like...

I feel like it's more like a process.

Like a... Like a rite of passage.

You know, like...

Like every kid has to go through it.

Not every kid.

I've never really thought about it before.

But

maybe I just discovered the one

beautiful thing about my dad,

passing away when he did.

In my eyes,

my dad is perfect.

It's the only way I ever saw him.

And it's the only way I will ever see him.

My dad will always be perfect.

He is perfect, man.

Well, for me it was a moment.

One moment.

It was the day after my 16th birthday and

I was still sad the night before 'cause

my dad got in yet another fight

with his flavor of the month girlfriend and

basically ruined my birthday.

He whispered something to her at the restaurant and

the next thing I knew,

she stormed out.

You know, it was actually a thrill to see the bitch go.

But even though he stayed,

he wasn't really there.

His mind and his heart

were clearly somewhere else.

And maybe I'm being like,

a bit selfish,

but I sort of thought that

his mind and his heart

should be on his 16-year-old daughter.

But the actual fight wasn't...

The...

The punch, it was the next day,

when I asked my dad what had happened,

turns out, he said to her,

"You are the most beautiful woman in this restaurant."

(SIGHS)

And before pouring her wine on him and storming out,

she said,

"How dare you look at every other woman in here."

(SCOFFS)

Wow. Yeah.

Wow.

And in that moment...

I asked myself,

"What kind of person..."

Can actually say something like that? No.

"What kind of person

"would date a person

"who would say that?"

(INHALES) That was like

a gut punch.

(SIGHS) Yeah.

What are you doing?

What are you doing?

I don't know. You made me cry.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Gonna miss you guys.

Honestly.

Hmm.

I never thought

I would hear those words from your mouth.

I know. (GIGGLES)

Who are you? It feels heart.

Oh, no, I was going to, um...

Ah, sorry, I thought...

Are you in a hurry to get back?

(SIGHS)

(SIGHS)

Get good grades.

Get your extra-curriculars going.

Get SAT tutors.

Get good SAT scores. Get into a good school.

I just realized the entire purpose of my life so far

is been to get into college.

That's true.

And what do we do now?

What do we do

now that we've done the thing we've spent our entire life doing.

I guess we do the next thing we'll spend our entire life doing.

So, I guess in a way our first life is over?

I guess it is.

Any regrets?

Who's got time for should have, would have, could haves?

Em...

(SCOFFS)

I am not your type, I get it.

Em...

You're beautiful.

You're smart.

You're every guy's type.

Not every guy's.

I think you're amazing. I... I just...

So if my first life

is over and my next life starts tomorrow,

that kind of means this didn't happen, right?

A monkey can type Hamlet.

I guess that whole space-time continuum theory

can make this moment disappear.

Wait... What moment?

What?

You know I was thinking of trying to get laid before going to college.

Yeah, I kind of figured that out.

I was thinking it could be you.

Kind of figured that out too.

(LAUGHS)

It's magical, isn't it?

Yes, it is.

It's a perfect...

Chill spot, right?

That's exactly what I was going to say.

Didn't know anybody else used that term.

Right tribe, and the right chill spot.

That's all you need.

How long have I been rubbing this peach?

(ALL LAUGHING)

Fuck it! Come on, Staminence!

Let's see how amazing you really are.

OSCAR: What? What?

Are you coming or not?

OSCAR: With you? Yeah, let's go.

Oh, yeah! Go!

OSCAR: Fuck, yeah!

Okay. JEN: And bring a blanket.

Move, please.

Have fun storming the castle.

JEN: Hurry up, Staminence. OSCAR: Coming.

SERENA: Look at this.

Incredible.

I can't believe this is happening.

Kissing you feels...

I'm sorry, I know it's not...

...amazing.

What?

I think you're amazing.

What?

How did I not see it before?

How did I not see you?

I think you're beautiful.

Ridiculous. Um...

(SIGHS) I guess good old-fashioned missionary for me.

I know, I know. It's pretty boring

as far as that stuff goes.

Is this really happening?

Yeah.

Is it boring enough for you?

It's the perfect amount of boring.

(SIGHS)

Purple, Chicken and waffles... Uh-huh.

Shakedown Street.

Dead Poet Society... Oh, and... Okay.

Sixteen Candles, The Big Lebowski, Dazed and Confused,

Annie Hall, Groundhog Day... Uh-huh.

One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest,

It's a Wonderful life. Right.

Toy Story, Stand by Me.

Breakfast Club, Fight Club...

I just...

I could never pick just one.

So, yeah, uh...

Oh, and...

Being on top.

I, uh...

I haven't seen that one.

It's not a movie.

Okay.

AIDEN: I don't ever want this to end.

Oh, my God, it's not going to end, is it?

Oscar said it's really hard to come on ecstasy.

I mean, normally...

I would have been coming by now.

Normally, I... I should be coming, you know.

But I'm not going to.

I'm so grateful for that.

(LAUGHS)

I'm just so grateful for you.

And for everything.

I'm just so fucking full of gratitude.

You were my answer,

Serena.

Jesse asked us

what would make this day perfect.

You said having sex with me?

No.

I said, "Telling you..."

Telling me what?

That I've loved you for...

Well, forever.

Pardon my manners.

(MUSIC PLAYING)

JESSE: So, maybe I was wrong.

Maybe when it's real love,

the falling-in-love part never ends.

You, um, want to head back?

Yeah.

Oscar was right.

Not a bad day.

75.

What's that?

75 is

the miles from Berkeley to Santa Cruz.

75 is the miles

I will drop everything and drive whenever you need.

75 is the miles I hope you'll drive whenever I need you.

Of course.

75 miles is nothing.

You won't be alone.

(SIGHS)

75 miles is nothing.

Good day, man.

(BOTTLES CLINK)

(SIGHS)

(MUSIC PLAYING)

(DOOR CLOSES)

Hi. SERENA: Hi.

Uh, can I have my shirt?

Um, yeah. Yeah.

Thank you.

I'm going to go.

(SLOW ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

JESSE: I wish you could see this.

Wish you could see them.

I wish you could see me.

(WAVES ROLLING)

Who am I?

I'm your son.

(SONG PLAYING)