Original subtitles

>> THEY WERE THE KINGS OF AN

ERA. WE'VE ALREADY SEEN WHERE THEY

WERE AFTER WE DIDN'T KNOW WHERE

THEY WERE, BUT WHERE ARE THEY

NOW NOW?

JUST WHEN EVERYONE THOUGHT

SNAKES N' BARRELS WERE DONE FOR

GOOD, THEY REUNITED.

BUT TRAGEDY WOULD INTERVENE.

UNTIL NOW NOW.

SNAKES N' BARRELS IS BACK AGAIN!

...AND DYNAMIC NEW FRONT MAN

RIKKI KIXX ARE BACK TO KICK YOUR

ASS INTO SOBRIETY!

>> I MET THESE GUYS AT THEIR

ABSOLUTE WORST AND PULLED THEM

OUT OF THE DARK AND GOT THEM

CLEAN AT MY RIKKI KIXX

"KIKKIN' IT" REHAB CENTER.

AND WE JUST HIT IT OFF, AND THE

NEXT THING I KNEW, I WAS THEIR

NEW SINGER.

IT WAS MAGICAL.

>> RIKKI KIXX HAS TAKEN IN MANY

EX-ROCKERS AND HELPED THEM GET

OFF DRUGS AND ALCOHOL.

>> THE KEY TO GETTING SOBER AND

LIVING CLEAN IS IDENTIFYING THE

PROBLEM.

AND THAT PROBLEM WAS PICKLES.

>> AND THIS MONTH, FOR THE FIRST

TIME EVER, THE NEW ENERGIZED AND

SOBER SNAKES N' BARRELS WILL

HEADLINE THE RIKKI KIXX

"SOBERTOWN U.S.A. NO DRUGS

ALLOWED SOBER ROCK 'N' ROLL

SHOW," HOSTED BY LEONARD ROCKSTEIN, FORMERLY

KNOWN AS DR. ROCKZO,

THE ROCK 'N' ROLL CLOWN. ALL PROCEEDS TO GO TO THE

RIKKI KIXX "KIKKIN' IT" REHAB CENTER.

>> WE'RE BRINGING SOBER BACK,

AND WE'RE TAKING NAMES!

SOBER IS THE FUTURE OF

ROCK 'N' ROLL!

>> ♪ TICK-TOCK TICK-TOCK ♪

♪ TICK-TOCK TICK-TOCK ♪

♪ TICK-TOCK TICK-TOCK ♪

♪ TICK-TOCK TICK-TOCK ♪

♪ TICK-TOCK TICK-TOCK ♪

♪ DETHKLOK! DETHKLOK! DETHKLOK!

DETHKLOK! ♪

♪ I'M...TICKING...

FOR...THE... ♪

♪ DETHKLOK, DETHKLOK ♪

♪ SKWISGAAR SKWIGELF,

TALLER THAN A TREE ♪

♪ TOKI WARTOOTH,

NOT A BUMBLEBEE ♪

♪ WILLIAM MURDERFACE

MURDERFACE MURDERFACE ♪

♪ PICKLES THE DRUMMER

DOODILY DOO DING DONG DOODILY ♪

>> Pickles: HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?

THAT'S MY [BLEEP] BAND OUT

THERE, AND THEY'RE SOBER?!

>> Charles: WELL, PICKLES, I

HATE TO TELL YOU, BUT YOU DON'T

ACTUALLY OWN THE NAME SNAKES N' BARRELS.

>> Pickles: WHY NOT?!

HOW DID YOU LET THAT HAPPEN?!

>> Charles: WELL, THE BAND

EXISTED BEFORE YOU GOT THERE,

AND I DIDN'T REPRESENT YOU THEN.

I CAN ASSURE YOU IT WOULDN'T

HAVE HAPPENED HAD I --

>> Pickles: THEY'RE SOBER!

>> Charles: COULD YOU PLEASE

STOP BREAKING MY GOOD LAMPS?

BREAK THOSE.

THEY'RE FROM IKEA.

>> Pickles: WHAT, THESE ONES?

>> Charles: UH, YEAH. >> Pickles: YOU REALLY GOT A LOT

OF LAMPS IN HERE. >> Charles: WELL, LIGHTING IS

IMPORTANT. IT CREATES A NICE ATMOS--

>> Pickles: AAH!

THE WHOLE THING THAT GETS ME IS

THAT THEY GOT A NEW SINGER.

WHO THE [BLEEP] IS THAT DILDO?

HE'S LIKE A CHEAP CRAPPY

KNOCKOFF, YOU KNOW?

AND HE CHANGED THEM.

IT'S LIKE THOSE GUYS ARE

BRAINWASHED!

IF I COULD JUST TALK TO THEM...

>> Charles: WELL, YOU CAN'T,

PICKLES.

THEY HAVE A RESTRAINING ORDER

AGAINST YOU.

>> Pickles: A RESTRAINING ORDER?

[BLEEP] SNEAKY SOBER [BLEEP]

SUCKER!

>> Charles: CAN WE GET SOME MORE

LAMPS IN HERE, PLEASE?

THE CHEAP ONES. THANK YOU.

>> Toki: HEY, WHO AMS BREAKINGS

ALL THIS LAMPS?

I WANT TO BREAK SOME!

>> Charles: THEY'RE BRINGING IN

MORE.

>> Toki: WOWEE!

>> Murderface: HEY!

HEY, ALL THIS SNAKES N' BARRELS

GOT ME THINKING THAT I GOT SOME

LEGAL QUESTIONS ABOUT MY SIDE

BAND -- YOU KNOW, PLANET PISS.

>> Charles: DO YOU THINK IT CAN

WAIT? WE'RE IN A MEETING HERE.

>> Murderface: WHAT ARE YOU MEETING ABOUT, LAMPS?

[ GLASS SHATTERING ]

I GET IT, I GET IT.

DON'T WORRY ABOUT MURDERFACE.

IT DOESN'T MATTER.

I DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM.

JUST LOOK RIGHT PAST ME.

>> Charles: ALL RIGHT, ALL

RIGHT, WHAT DO YOU WANT?

>> Murderface: I JUST WANT TO

TALK ABOUT THE FUTURE OF

PLANET PISS, YOU KNOW?

SO I DON'T WAKE UP SOMEDAY WITH

PLANET PISS BEING FRONTED BY

SOME OTHER ASSHOLE.

>> Charles: OKAY, OKAY.

>> Murderface: THAT'S MY BAND!

>> Charles: REGISTER THE NAME,

OKAY?

>> Murderface: YEAH, YEAH.

I KNOW THAT STUFF.

>> Charles: NO. HAVE YOU

REGISTERED THE NAME PLANET PISS?

>> Murderface: YEAH. >> Charles: YOU HAVE?

>> Murderface: YEAH. I WILL. >> Charles: OKAY, THEN?

>> Murderface: OKAY. >> Charles: NOW IF YOU DON'T

MIND, I'M TALKING WITH --

>> Murderface: HEY, DON'T BLOW

ME OFF!

I GOT STUFF TO SAY!

>> Charles: WHAT DO YOU GOT?

[ GLASS SHATTERING ]

>> Murderface: UHHHHHHHHHHH...

I DON'T KNOW.

I WANT T-SHIRTS. I WANT TO MAKE SOME T-SHIRTS.

>> Charles: YOU WANT TO MAKE

PLANET PISS T-SHIRTS?

>> Murderface: YEAH, PLANET PISS

T-SHIRTS. T-SHIRTS ARE A BIG SELLER.

IT'S MERCH! >> Charles: I HEAR YOU.

I'M GOING TO GET BACK TO THIS NOW.

WE'LL GET THAT DONE. LATER. OKAY?

>> Murderface: OKAY. BETTER GET IT DONE.

>> Charles: YES, I AGREE.

GET IT DONE. >> Murderface: OKAY, WHY DON'T

YOU GET BACK TO THIS THEN?

WE'LL GET THAT DONE LATER.

>> Charles: THANKS. YES, ALL RIGHT. WE'LL DO THAT.

>> Murderface: YOU'RE WELCOME. HELP OUT PICKLES.

>> Charles: YES. >> Murderface: YOU'RE WELCOME.

GET THIS STUFF DONE LATER. >> Charles: OKAY.

>> Murderface: YOU CONCENTRATE

ON THE FIRST THING --

DO THAT NOW, GET MY STUFF LATER.

I'LL TAKE A BACK SEAT. >> Charles: THANK YOU.

THAT'S VERY EXPANSIVE OF YOU.

>> Murderface: WELL, YOU KNOW,

TEAM PLAYER, TEAM PLAYER.

>> Charles: ALL RIGHT, I'LL GET

BACK TO THIS NOW. >> Murderface: BUT WE WILL MEET

LATER ABOUT THOSE T-SHIRTS. >> Charles: YES, WE WILL.

>> Murderface: YEAH, A LOT OF

OTHER ISSUES, TOO, BUT YOU JUST,

YEAH. GET IN THERE.

>> Charles: OKAY. WE DONE?

>> Murderface: YEAH. TILL LATER.

>> Charles: YES, TILL LATER.

>> Murderface: RIGHT. >> YOUR LAMPS, SIR.

>> Pickles: OVER HERE. SORRY.

GIVE ME ONE. >> Toki: OH, ME TOO!

NOW TAKES THAT, YOU STUPID

LAMPS!

>> Skwisgaar: UH, EXCUSE MEs.

WE'S HAS BEEN TALKINGS, AND --

>> Nathan: WE WANT TO KNOW WHO

OWNS THE NAME "DETHKLOK."

>> Charles: GUYS, I'M IN A

MEETING RIGHT NOW, IF YOU DON'T

MIND. >> Nathan: WHAT ARE YOU MEETING

ABOUT, LAMPS? >> Charles: WELL, PARTIALLY, BUT

CAN YOU JUST HANG ON? >> Skwisgaar: HOW COMES WE

AIN'TS INVITEDS TO THE LAMPS

MEETINGS, HUH?! SEE!

THIS ALWAYS HAPPENS. WE GETS EXCLUDEDS.

>> Charles: IT'S NOT REALLY A

LAMP MEETING, SKWISGAAR, AND IF

IT WERE, I'D INVITE YOU.

>> Skwisgaar: THAT'S ALL I WANTS

TO KNOWS. >> Nathan: HEY, WHO OWNS THE

NAME "DETHKLOK"? >> Charles: GUYS, YOU SHOULD

KNOW THIS ONE. IT'S VERY EASY.

>> Toki: UM...YOUS?

YOUS OWNS IT? >> Charles: YOU GUYS DO.

THE FIVE OF YOU OWN THE NAME OF

YOUR BAND.

>> Toki: OH, THAT'S GOODS.

>> Nathan: OH, THANK GOD!

WHEN WERE YOU GONNA TELL US

THAT? >> Pickles: YOU KNOW WHAT?

[BLEEP] THIS [BLEEP] ALL RIGHT?!

I'M [BLEEP] PISSED OFF!

[BLEEP] SOBER [BLEEP] AND

[BLEEP] THE RESTRAINING ORDER!

I GOT TO TALK TO THOSE GUYS!

>> Charles: PICKLES, I'D ADVISE

AGAINST IT. DON'T GO OVER THERE.

>> Pickles: [BLEEP] THAT [BLEEP] I'M GOING!

WHERE ARE THEY NOW?

>> Skwisgaar: YOU MEANS THE TV

SHOWS? >> Pickles: NO, NO, NO.

SNAKES N' BARRELS.

WHERE ARE THEY NOW?

WHERE ARE THEY NOW?

>> Nathan: OH, "WHERE ARE THEY

NOW NOW"? RIGHT?

>> Pickles: YEAH. >> Nathan: THAT'S IN THE OTHER

ROOM. THAT'S A TV SHOW. >> Toki: YEAH, "WHERE ARE THEY

NOWS NOW." THEYS ONS THE TV.

>> Pickles: NO, WHERE ARE THE BAND SNAKES N' BARRELS NOW?

>> Murderface: WHERE DO THEY

FILM "WHERE ARE THEY NOW NOW"?

>> Nathan: PICKLES, I TRY NOT TO

WATCH A LOT OF TV, SO I DON'T REALLY KNOW HOW TO HELP YOU.

>> Pickles: NO, I WANT TO KNOW

WHERE THEY ACTUALLY ARE RIGHT

NOW.

[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]

>> Charles: STOP! STOP! STOP.

THEY'RE IN L.A.

[ GLASS SHATTERING ]

>> Stampingston: GENTLEMEN,

SNAKES N' BARRELS IS REUNITING

AGAIN, AGAIN, WITHOUT PICKLES.

SOME TIME AGO, WE ATTEMPTED TO

CONTROL PICKLES AND

SNAKES N' BARRELS WITH A

TOP-SECRET EXPERIMENTAL DRUG

CALLED TOTALLY AWESOME SWEET

ALABAMA LIQUID SNAKE.

PICKLES' TOLERANCE TO THE DRUG

RENDERED OUR PLAN USELESS.

>> Orlaag: IT WAS A TOTAL

FIASCO. >> Stampingston: HERE TO EXPLAIN

MORE IS

DR. AMOMOLITH CHESTERFIELD.

>> MY DRUG, TOTALLY AWESOME

SWEET ALABAMA LIQUID SNAKE,

WORKED ON THE REST OF

SNAKES N' BARRELS AND LEFT THEM

BLANK SLATES READY TO BE

REPROGRAMMED.

UNFORTUNATELY, THE FIRST PERSON

THEY ENCOUNTERED WAS RIKKI KIXX.

>> Stampingston: AND HE USED HIS

SOBER INFLUENCE TO CUT HIMSELF

IN ON THE RIGHTS TO

SNAKES N' BARRELS.

>> MY DRUG IS STILL ALIVE IN THE

SYSTEMS OF THE NOW-SOBER MEMBERS

OF SNAKES N' BARRELS.

I, HOWEVER, HAVE A GRAVE

WARNING.

THERE IS A LONG-TERM SIDE

EFFECT -- A TERRIBLE AND

DESTRUCTIVE SIDE EFFECT.

WITH ENOUGH STIMULUS, THE DRUG

LIVING IN THEIR FAT CELLS WILL

IGNITE.

>> Stampingston: SPONTANEOUS

HUMAN COMBUSTION.

>> NOT QUITE.

BLUE PHOSPHOROUS SNAKES WILL

SHOOT FORTH FROM THE ORIFICES OF

THE USERS, AND THEY WILL GO MAD

WITH RAGE.

>> Orlaag: ALL OF THEIR

ORIFICES?

>> I'M AFRAID SO.

>> Crozier: WHAT KIND OF

STIMULUS CAN CAUSE THIS?

>> BRIGHT LIGHTS, LOUD SOUNDS,

PYROTECHNICS.

>> Stampingston: THIS RIKKI KIXX

"SOBERTOWN U.S.A. NO DRUGS

ALLOWED SOBER ROCK 'N' ROLL

SHOW," HOSTED BY

LEONARD ROCKSTEIN, COULD BE A

DISASTER.

>> LET'S HOPE THAT I'M WRONG,

GENTLEMEN.

LET'S HOPE THAT I AM WRONG.

[ CAR ALARM ACTIVATES ]

[ HORN HONKS ]

>> I HAVE CLARITY NOW, AND

THAT'S AN AMAZING THING, I TELL

YOU.

AND THE KEY TO GETTING CLEAN IS

KILLING THAT PART OF YOU THAT

WAS HURTING YOU.

YOU GOT TO KILL THAT PART OF

YOURSELF.

AND FOR ME, IT WAS THAT CLOWN.

THAT [BLEEP] [BLEEP] CLOWN.

THE CLOWN HAD TO GO DOWN.

LEONARD ROCKSTEIN DIDN'T LIKE

TO DO DRUGS.

LEONARD ROCKSTEIN'S A NICE GUY

WITH ASPIRATIONS.

LEONARD ROCKSTEIN'S GOING TO

DeVRY, LEARNING HOW TO BE AN

I.T. TECH, GETTING HIS [BLEEP]

TOGETHER.

NOT THE CLOWN.

T-T-THE CLOWN LOVED COCAINE.

T-T-THE CLOWN LOVED STEALING AND

HURTIN' HIS FRIENDS.

THE CLOWN DID IT ALL.

BUT I WRESTLED THAT CLOWN.

I WRESTLED THAT CLOWN AND BROKE

HIS [BLEEP] FACE!

AND I SAID, "CLOWN, GET OUT!

GET OUT, CLOWN!

GET OUT!"

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

ANYWAY, I'VE BEEN SOBER FOR

ABOUT TWO MONTHS, GIVE OR TAKE.

THANK YOU!

>> YES! CLAP FOR HIM!

CLAP FOR HIM, MY CHILDREN OF

SOBRIETY!

SHOW HIM YOUR LOVE!

NOW, AS YOU KNOW, THE CONCERT IS

COMING UP TOMORROW, AND YOU WILL

BE TEMPTED BY DRUGS AND ALCOHOL!

BUT WE MUST BE STRONG, CHILDREN.

WE ARE POWERFUL, AND WE HAVE THE

POWER TO MAKE ROCK 'N' ROLL

SOBER FOREVER!

NOW LET'S PASS THAT [BLEEP]

BASKET AROUND.

>> Toki: OH, THERES.

NOWS I'Ms THE OWNERS OF THE

PLANETS PISS DOMAIN.

>> Skwisgaar: YEAH, THAT'S

PRETTYS GOODS.

YOU AMs THE OWNERS OF ALL THE

PLANETS PISS OUT THERE.

>> Nathan: AND DOT ENT AND

DOT U.K.

>> Toki: DOTS EVERYTHINGS!

I OWNS IT ALL!

I LOVES IT!

>> Skwisgaar: HEYS, I GOTS A

REALLY GOODS IDEAS!

DOES ANYBODIES OF YOUS KNOWS

ANYTHINGS ABOUT WEBS DESIGNS?

>> Toki: I JUST INSTALLEDS A

RIPPED VERSIONS OF THE

DREAMWEAVERS. >> Nathan: THIS IS GONNA BE

GOOD.

>> MASTER, I HAVE THE NUMBERS

FOR THE SOBRIETY CONCERT TICKET

PRESALES.

>> OH, YES?

WELL, DON'T JUST STAND THERE!

TELL ME, YOU [BLEEP] TWIT!

>> THE CONCERT HAS SOLD OUT.

>> THIS DESERVES A TOAST!

GET ME A BOTTLE OF THE, UH...

NO!

>> M-MASTER?

>> OH, DAMN IT!

DAMN YOU, SOBRIETY, YOU HORRID

[BLEEP] MONSTER!

>> WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?

>> WHAT AM I SAYING?

DON'T YOU [BLEEP] GET IT?!

SOBRIETY IS A CONSTANT HELL.

DON'T YOU THINK I'D BE DRINKING

IF I COULD?

BUT I CAN'T!

YOU KNOW WHY I CAN'T?

BECAUSE MY [BLEEP] LIVER IS

SHOT.

I CAN'T BECAUSE THE [BLEEP] COPS

MAKE ME DO PERIODICAL DRUG

TESTS!

I CAN'T BECAUSE I'M THE [BLEEP]

SPOKESPERSON FOR A [BLEEP] REHAB

CENTER!

I'M [BLEEP] [BLEEP]

>> BUT THEN WHY ARE YOU HELPING

PEOPLE KICK DRUGS AND ALCOHOL?

>> WHY?

YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY?

BECAUSE IF I HAVE TO BE SOBER,

THEN I'LL MAKE EVERYBODY SOBER,

AND THEY'LL HAVE TO LIVE IN THE

HELL ON EARTH THAT I DO.

>> NO! IT'S NOT TRUE.

>> YES! SO NOW YOU KNOW.

NOW YOU [BLEEP] KNOW!

AND YOU'LL DO WELL TO KEEP YOUR

FILTHY MOUTH SHUT ABOUT IT.

KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT, OR WE'LL

LOSE EVERYTHING.

>> OF COURSE, MASTER. OF COURSE.

YOU CAN TRUST ME.

I-I WON'T TELL ANYONE.

>> THAT'S RIGHT.

YOU WON'T.

>> [ GAGGING ]

>> DIE, YOU PIECE OF [BLEEP]

[ BONES CRACKING ]

THAT'S RIGHT.

YOU WON'T.

[ AIR BRAKES HISS ]

>> MY LORDS, WE ARE IN L.A.

>> Toki: WOWEE!

WHATS IS L.A.?

>> Pickles: IT'S THE HOME OF

ROCK.

COME ON, I'LL SHOW YOU!

THIS PLACE USED TO BE

DR. THONG'S HONEY PIT RIGHT

HERE.

THIS PLACE WAS PACKED WITH

CREAM-OF-THE-CROP, SCUMBAG ROCK

ROYALTY, SHOOTING [BLEEP] DOPE

AND GETTING LAP DANCES.

>> Murderface: BUT, PICKLES, THE

GUYS IN GLAM ROCK SEEM LIKE

LONG-HAIRED PUSSIES WITH MAKEUP

ON AND TIGHT PANTS, YOU KNOW?

>> Pickles: AND I'M NOT SAYING

THEY WEREN'T, MURDERFACE, BUT

EVEN THE SUPER-POSER GLAM ROCK

PUSSIES UNDERSTOOD THE

ROCK 'N' ROLL FUNDAMENTALS OF

DRUGS AND ALCOHOL.

>> Skwisgaar: OH, YEAH, THEMS

AM SOME PRETTY HOT SKANKS I'D

LIKES TO TAKES A CRACK AT.

>> Nathan: YOU KNOW IT!

>> Toki: OH, WHO'S THATS GUY?

>> Pickles: THAT'S TIMMY RAZZLE

OF THE BAND RAZZLE STICKS.

>> Murderface: WHAT, SO HE'S

GONNA HAVE A GANG BANG AND

STUFF, AND HE CAN'T GET IT UP?

>> Pickles: WELL, KIND OF.

HE'S DEAD. [ CHUCKLES ]

>> Murderface: THAT'S PRETTY

GOOD. >> Pickles: YEAH, HE O.D.'ed.

I DON'T KNOW. WHATEVER.

LOOK, THERE'S ANDY SMACKS.

OKAY, THIS IS A CLASSIC DRUG

STORY. YOU KNOW, YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING

COKE? YOU'RE NOT.

YOU'RE DOING ANGEL DUST.

[BLEEP] ANGEL DUST.

ANYWAY, HE SHOT SOME COPS,

CHALLENGED A PROFESSIONAL PRIZE

FIGHTER TO A BAREKNUCKLE

MATCH -- AND WON! -- AND STILL

HAD THE ENERGY TO BURN.

I DON'T KNOW. AND THEN -- WAIT, WAIT, WAIT,

WAIT, WAIT -- CHECK THIS OUT.

LOOK. AND THERE HE GOES OFF THE

CAPITOL RECORDS BUILDING.

WHOO! >> Toki: WOWEE!

WHATS A WAYS TO GO!

SPLATS!

>> Pickles: OH, NO, TOKI.

HE LIVED.

>> Toki: OH, THAT'S BRUTAL!

>> Murderface: THAT'S AWESOME!

>> Pickles: OKAY, HERE'S THE

DUMPSTER WHERE SUZZIE FAT TITS

AND THE RAZOR CLAN USED TO LIVE

AND PRACTICE.

THEY THREW SOME GOOD PARTIES.

>> Murderface: WOW! FOUR HOT

SLUTS LIVING IN GARBAGE?!

>> Skwisgaar: SOUNDS GOODS.

>> Murderface: CALLED

"BEING PROFESSIONAL."

>> Pickles: THIS IS WHERE I SAW

FRANKIE SWITCHBLADE, OF THE BAND

SUPER DESTROYER [BLEEP] MACHINE,

BLOWING A GUY. RIGHT THERE.

>> Murderface: OH! NO WAY!

>> Nathan: OH, MY GOD.

>> Pickles: THAT GUY WAS ME.

>> Nathan: OH, PICKLES.

>> Pickles: I'M JUST KIDDING!

BUT YOU GUYS GET MY POINT ABOUT

THE WHOLE ROCK 'N' ROLL THING,

RIGHT?

>> Nathan: HOLLYWOOD.

[BLEEP] BULL [BLEEP]

[BLEEP] L.A.

>> Toki: THIS IS ONE [BLEEP] UP

TOWN. >> Nathan: I WOULD KILL MYSELF

IF I LIVED HERE.

>> Toki: I WONDER IF ABSOLUTELY

EVERYONES HERES IS STUPIDS.

>> Murderface: EVERY SINGLE

RESIDENT!

>> Nathan: YEAH, AND EVERY TV

NETWORK OUT HERE IS A PIECE OF

[BLEEP] RIGHT, GUYS?

>> Murderface: GOT THAT RIGHT.

>> Pickles: AND MORE

IMPORTANTLY, IF YOU DIDN'T

CONTRACT AN STD OR O.D. IN THE

CITY, THEN YOU DIDN'T EXIST!

THINK ABOUT IT, ALL OF YOU.

>> Murderface: I'M THINKING

ABOUT IT.

>> Pickles: DRUGS AND ALCOHOL

ARE SLOWLY BEING PHASED OUT OF

THE MUSIC WE LOVE, AND WE'RE IN

A [BLEEP] UP STATE OF THE WORLD

IF OUR BIGGEST LUNATIC DRUG IDOL

IS [BLEEP] PETER O'TOOLE!

>> Murderface: [BLEEP] ME UNDER

THE TABLE. >> Nathan: THAT GUY COULD PARTY.

>> Pickles: I NEED ALL YOUR GUYS

HELP TO GET IN THE SHOW TONIGHT.

WE HAVE A RESPONSIBILITY -- A

[BLEEP] RESPONSIBILITY TO CHANGE

THIS.

>> Toki: WHAT'S WRONGS WITH

BEINGS SOBERS?

SOBERS PEOPLES ARE PEOPLES, TOO!

I WILL GOs WITH YOU TO THE SHOWS

AND ENJOYS MYSELFS, BUT I WON'Ts

HELP!

>> Murderface: [BLEEP] TOKI!

YOU KLUTZ!

I GOT SODA ON MY SHORTS!

>> Nathan: WHAT? YOU GET SODA ON

YOUR SHORTS? >> Murderface: [BLEEP] YEAH!

LOOK AT IT! >> Skwisgaar: LOOKS LIKE YOU

TAKES A LEAKS ON YOURSELVES.

>> Murderface: I [BLEEP] WISH IT

WAS PISS, BUT IT'S [BLEEP] SODA.

THAT'S STICKY! >> Pickles: GUYS, WE GOT TO GO.

THE CONCERT'S THE ONLY PLACE I

CAN TALK TO SNAKES N' BARRELS.

LET'S GO! >> Murderface: I GOT TO GO BACK

TO THE BUS AND CHANGE MY SHORTS!

THANKS A LOT, TOKI!

>> Pickles: WELL, FINE.

WE'LL SEE YOU THERE!

>> HEY, GET THIS GUY OUTTA HERE!

LOOK, HE TRIED TO BRING IN A BAG

OF DRUGS -- COKE, HEROIN, A

CHERRY PIE WITH POT IN IT.

GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE, YOU

PIECE OF [BLEEP]

I'LL TAKE THIS AND DESTROY IT

LATER ON.

>> PLEASE WELCOME YOUR HOST!

YOU KNOW HIM AS DR. ROCKZO,

THE ROCK 'N' ROLL CLOWN, BUT NOW

HE'S CLEAN AND SOBER!

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

LEONARD ROCKSTEIN!

>> AND THANK YOU!

OH, WOW.

IT IS GREAT TO BE HERE, AND IT'S

GREAT TO BE SOBER!

WITH SOBRIETY, WE ARE STRONG!

YOU KNOW WHAT?

LET'S JUST TAKE OVER

ROCK 'N' ROLL WITH SOBRIETY!

LET'S DO THAT.

LET'S JUST DO THAT.

>> Toki: OH, GOOD JOBS, ROCKZOS!

SEES? SOBERS IS COOLS!

>> WOW! WOW!

YOU GUYS REALLY KNOW HOW TO

ROCK SOBER STYLE!

WOW!

HUH, THIS IS ACTUALLY MY FIRST

TIME BEING ON STAGE SOBER.

>> YOO-HOO!

I KA KA KA KA SEE YOU, B-BABY!

I DO COCAINE.

I REALLY DO COCAINE.

>> IT'S, UH...REALLY GOOD TO BE

BACK ON THE...ON..

>> YOU WANT TO DO THIS SWEET

COCAINE, BABY?

>> UH...UH...

>> YOU WANT IT, BABY.

COME ON.

YOU KNOW YOU WANT IT, DON'T YOU?

>> GET OUT OF HERE!

GET OUT OF HERE, MAN!

I'M FINE. I'M FINE.

OHHHHH!

OKAY, I'M FINE. I'M FINE.

JUST GET OUT.

I MEAN, I'M HERE. I'M SOBER.

OH.

GET OUT OF HERE, MAN!

OHH! OUT!

OH, NO!

OHH!

>> HEY, WHAT THE HELL IS GOING

ON?!

INTRODUCE THE OPENING BAND!

>> OH, RIGHT, RIGHT.

WELCOME -- WELCOME YOUR OPENING

BAND -- MANHATTAN SIDEWINDER.

I-I'M OKAY. I'M OKAY.

[ ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ]

>> Nathan: THIS [BLEEP] BLOWS.

>> Skwisgaar: YEAH. >> Nathan: YOU THINKING WHAT I'M

THINKING? >> Skwisgaar: GETS WASTEDS

BEYONDS BELIEF? >> Nathan: [BLEEP] YEAH, MAMA.

TOKI, YOU WANT ANYTHING?

NOS, I'Ms OBSERVING SOBRIETYS

TODAYS.

>> Nathan: YOUR LOSS.

>> Skwisgaar: THERE AMS THE BARS

RIGHT OVER THERES.

COME ONS.

>> MANHATTAN SIDEWINDER!

>> HEY, BUDDY, NOBODY GETS BY

WITHOUT A BACKSTAGE PASS.

>> Pickles: OH, YOU WANT

$10,000?

>> GO ON THROUGH.

>> Pickles: GUYS, WAIT!

>> HEY, IT'S PICKLES!

>> HEY, MAN, WHAT'S UP?

>> Pickles: WHAT'S UP?

YOU GUYS RESTARTED THE [BLEEP]

BAND WITHOUT ME! WHAT THE [BLEEP] IS THAT ALL

ABOUT?!

[BLEEP] RIKKI KIXX?!

>> WE GOT SOBER, AND RIKKI KIND

OF APPROACHED US, AND, WELL...

I MEAN, IT JUST KIND OF

HAPPENED.

>> WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

>> IT'S GREAT MAN.

IT'S AWESOME.

YOU KNOW, NOT DOING ANY DRUGS,

BEING SOBER.

>> SAVING MONEY.

SO AMAZING.

IT'S LIKE A WHOLE NEW LEVEL.

MY HAT FITS A LOT BETTER NOW.

>> NOT DRINKING, HAVING FUN.

JUST...IT'S GREAT.

>> Pickles: DUDE, TONY, WE'VE

BEEN [BLEEP] FRIENDS FOREVER.

HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?

HOW COULD YOU DO THIS?

>> Toki: JUST TRIES TO RELAX,

SIR. >> DO YOU KNOW WHO THIS IS?!

>> Toki: YEAH, I KNOWS.

>> YOU DON'T KNOW!

THIS IS MANHATTAN SIDEWINDER!

>> Toki: YES, I GATHEREDS THATS.

JUST TRIES TO KEEPS IN YOUR OWN

SPACE, PLEASE. THANKS.

>> Pickles: YOU CAN'T GO OUT

THERE WITH THAT DUMB [BLEEP]

JACKOFF.

HE JUST WANTS MONEY.

HE DOESN'T CARE.

HE DOESN'T CARE -- NOT LIKE HOW

I DO ABOUT YOU!

>> I BELIEVE THAT I DO.

I DO CARE.

GET THAT PIECE OF [BLEEP] OUT OF

HERE. >> Pickles: NO!

YOU MAY BE SOBER, BUT YOU'RE

STILL A STUPID, UGLY, DILDO

IDIOT SCUMBAG!

GET OFF ME!

DIDN'T I JUST GIVE YOU $10,000?

NO!

>> Nathan: WHAT DO YOU WANT,

LIKE A SHOT OR WHATEVER?

>> Skwisgaar: YEAH, WHATEVERS

WILL GETS US DRUNKS THE FASTEST.

>> Nathan: YOU! HEY, YOU, RIGHT THERE --

VODKA, TWO DOUBLES... >> Skwisgaar: GIVES TO US THE

BOTTLES. >> Nathan: ...'CAUSE WE GOT LOTS

OF CASH. >> FELLAS, IT DOESN'T ACTUALLY

WORK THAT WAY, MAN.

BUT I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.

YOU GUYS LIKE SHOTS?

>> Nathan: UH, YEAH, SURE, FINE.

>> HOW ABOUT THIS, GUYS?

HOW ABOUT A TOTALLY COOL SHOT OF

ICE-COLD MOUNTAIN WATER CHILLED

WITH CUCUMBER SLICES?

>> OR MAYBE YOU'RE FEELING

SASSY.

HOW ABOUT SOME OF THIS SPARKLING

CHERRY-APPLESAUCE DRINK? >> HOW ABOUT YOU, TONTO?

YOU LOOK LIKE YOU HAVE A TASTE

FOR THINGS SOUTH OF THE BORDER.

YOU LIKE MARGARITAS? >> Nathan: UH-HUH.

>> I THINK THAT'S A YES!

>> IF YOU LOVE MARGARITAS, WHY

NOT TRY SOME LEMONADE?

>> Nathan: THIS IS BULL[BLEEP]

DON'T [BLEEP] WITH US.

YOU GOT ALCOHOL?

>> WE HAVE SOMETHING BETTER.

>> Nathan: WHAT WOULD THAT BE?

>> AN APPLE -- GOD'S ALCOHOL.

>> Nathan: HEY, CAN YOU COME HERE REALLY QUICKLY?

BOTH OF YOU, COME HERE. I JUST WANT TO TELL YOU

SOMETHING. >> I'M RIGHT HERE.

>> WHAT'S GOING ON? >> Nathan: I JUST WANT TO TELL

YOU SOMETHING. >> CLOSER?

>> Nathan: YEAH, A LITTLE BIT, LITTLE BIT CLOSER.

>> HI. >> Nathan: HI.

>> OW! OW! OW!

OW!

>> AAH!

>> Nathan: DON'T YOU EVER

[BLEEP] WITH ME AND ALCOHOL.

GOT IT?

>> Murderface: [BLEEP] TOKI.

NOW MY SHORTS SMELL LIKE SODA.

I SHOULD BILL HIM.

WHAT A STUPID KLUTZ.

GUESS I'LL GET OUT OF HERE.

OH.

OH, WELL, MAYBE I'LL CHECK MY

MySpace.

>> Charles: YOU SHOULD REALLY

REGISTER PLANET PISS. >> Murderface: YEAH, RIGHT.

IT WON'T TAKE LONG.

I SHOULD.

WHAT?

ALL THE PLANET PISS DOMAIN NAMES

ARE TAKEN?

GOD, NO!

WHO DID THIS?

TOKI, I'LL KILL YOU!

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

>> HEY, HEY, HEY!

[ ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ]

WHOO-HOO!

HEY! WHOO!

WHOO!

>> Murderface: TOKI, I'LL KILL

YOU, MOTHER[BLEEP]

>> I SMELL THAT SWEET STUFF.

I SMELL THAT SWEET STUFF, BABY.

YEAH, BABY, I TOOK IT ALL.

OH, BABY.

>> [ SCREAMING ]

>> Toki: OH, THAT'S IT!

THAT'S IT, YOU MOTHER[BLEEP]

I'M KICKING YOUR ASS, YOU LOUD,

STUPID ASSHOLE.

THAT'S RIGHT!

I'LL KILL YOU!

SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!

>> OH, GOD. GET SOME.

GO GET SOME.

OH, BABY, YOU GONNA GET ME BACK.

YEAH!

>> AAH!

>> STAY HERE.

>> Pickles: WHAT THE HELL IS

GOING ON?

YOU'RE GONNA GET YOUR [BLEEP]

ASS KICKED, YOU SOBER DOUCHE!

>> [ ROARS ]

>> Murderface: MOTHER[BLEEP]

>> OH, GOD!

AAH!

>> AAH! AAH!

>> [ ROARS ]

>> Murderface: THERE YOU ARE,

YOU SCUMBAG! >> Toki: I'LL KILL YOU!

I'LL KILL YOU!

>> Nathan: TOKI, DON'T!

>> Toki: WHATS THE [BLEEP] DO

YOU WANT, MOTHER[BLEEP]

>> Murderface: WHAT'S UP, BRO?

WHAT'S HAPPENING, HUH?

>> I'M B-B-B-B-BACK, BABY!

THE NAME'S DR. ROCKZO, THE

ROCK-'N'-ROLL CLOWN.

AND I DO COCAINE!

[ Echoing ] COCAINE...COCAINE.