Original subtitles

>> Announcer: WELCOME BACK TO

"CASH-TASTROPHE," THE GAME WHERE

YOU WIN MONEY OR GET KILLED WITH

CASH.

>> IF YOUR CELEBRITY-HELPER PAL,

PICKLES, CAN ANSWER THIS FINAL

QUESTION CORRECTLY, YOU WILL SEE

$1 MILLION DROPPED FROM OUR

RAFTERS, AND IT WILL ALL BE

YOURS. HOWEVER, IF YOU ANSWER WRONG,

YOU KNOW -- KILLED WITH CASH.

>> Pickles: I'M REALLY A LITTLE

NERVOUS.

BUT, YOU KNOW, MY P.R. LADY SAYS

I SHOULD BE DOING THIS KIND OF

STUFF.

BUT, YOU KNOW, WHATEVER.

>> SO, FOR $1 MILLION --

>> Pickles: WHAT IS THIS SHOW?

>> S-SO, FOR $1 MILLION OR

DEATH, HERE'S YOUR QUESTION.

>> Pickles: OOH, THAT'S A TOUGH

QUESTION. >> Skwisgaar: AH, I THINKS IT'S

THE SUNS! >> Murderface: IT'S A STUPID

QUESTION! IT COULD BE ANYTHING!

>> Toki: PICKLE DON'T LOOK GOOD.

PICKLE LOOKS SCARED. >> HE'S FINE.

THIS IS OUTSTANDING EXPOSURE.

>> Nathan: WHO THE HELL IS THIS

LADY? >> Toki: OH, THAT'S PICKLE NEW

P.R. LADY. >> Nathan: SHE'S NOT A GROUPIE?

>> Toki: NO.

>> Nathan: NEVER MIND, THEN.

>> OKAY, PICKLES, TIME'S UP.

WHAT'S YOUR ANSWER?

>> Pickles: MAN, I GOT TO SAY

THAT'S A HARD QUESTION, BUT

HERE'S THE ANSWER -- THE EARTH.

THE EARTH IS NO LONGER

CONSIDERED A PLANET.

AM I -- AM I RIGHT? >> NO, I'M SORRY.

YOUR CELEBRITY-HELPER PAL DIDN'T

HELP YOU. THE CORRECT ANSWER IS PLUTO.

>> Pickles: PLUTO? REALLY?

>> PREPARED TO BE KILLED WITH

CASH.

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

>> NO, NO!

AAAAAH!

[ WHIRRING ]

>> THIS IS GREAT EXPOSURE.

>> ♪ TICK-TOCK TICK-TOCK ♪

♪ TICK-TOCK TICK-TOCK ♪

♪ TICK-TOCK TICK-TOCK ♪

♪ DETHKLOK! DETHKLOK! DETHKLOK!

DETHKLOK! ♪

>> Stampingston: THIS IS

LIZ BANE...

>> Crozier: ALIAS LIZ BLACKFIN.

>> Orlaag: ALIAS LIZ DEATHEYES.

>> Stampingston: ...RELIGIOUS

RADICAL FROM THE '70s.

SHE'S CREDITED WITH STARTING

DOZENS OF CULTS.

>> Crozier: HER BIGGEST CULT WAS

THE ORDER OF THE DYBBUKS.

THEY BELIEVED THEY WOULD ACHIEVE

IMMORTALITY BY TAKING OVER THE

BODIES OF FRENCH PEOPLE.

IN 1973, 28 DYBBUKS WALK INTO A

CROWDED PARISIAN CAFé ON THE

CHAMPS-ELYSéES.

THEY PULL OUT CEREMONIAL DAGGERS

AND MASSACRED A HUNDRED FRENCH

CITIZENS. IT WAS A BLOODBATH.

>> Orlaag: YES, AND SOMEHOW

MISS BANE WAS CLEARED OF ALL

CHARGES.

THEN A FEW YEARS AGO, SHE

STARTED A PUBLIC-RELATIONS FIRM

CALLED THE EXODUS P.R. FIRM.

>> Crozier: BANE IS CONCOCTING

SOMETHING BEYOND PUBLIC

RELATIONS.

>> Nathan: WE WANT OUR OLD P.R.

PERSON LIKE PICKLES HAS.

>> BUT I AM A P.R. PERSON.

>> Murderface: BUT WE WANT A

REAL P.R. PERSON.

>> I AM A REAL P.R. PERSON.

>> Skwisgaar: NO, WE WANTS A

REAL P.R. PERSON.

>> I AM A REAL P.R. PERSON.

>> Toki: BUT WE WANTS A LADY!

>> I -- FINE.

>> AND LOOK WHO'S HERE.

IT'S THE GUY WHO'S EVERYWHERE

NOW -- DETHKLOK'S DRUMMER,

PICKLES, ALONG WITH HIS

PUBLICIST, LIZ BANE.

YOUR FACE IS EVERYWHERE THESE

DAYS.

PEOPLE ARE CALLING YOU THE MOST

POPULAR MEMBER OF DETHKLOK.

HOW DOES THAT MAKE YOU FEEL?

>> Pickles: TWO WORDS -- DRUNK

AND HORNY. >> Murderface: PICKLES IS OUT

THERE HAVING THE TIME OF HIS LIFE.

HE'S EVERYWHERE. >> I KNOW, I KNOW.

THEY SAY THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS BAD PUBLICITY, BUT I HAPPEN

TO THINK YOU CAN DO YOURSELF A

DISSERVICE.

>> Pickles: AND THE WINNER GOES

TO "CINNAMON BUNS," STARRING

PICKLES, THE DRUMMER -- DIRECTED

BY VODKA AND BEER...AND...

[ SCREAMING ]

[ AUDIENCE GASPS ]

[ GUNFIRE ]

[ EXPLOSIONS ]

>> Murderface: WHY DON'T WE JUST

START OUR OWN P.R.?

>> Skwisgaar: JA, ALL'S IT IS IS

TELLING SOMEBODY SOMETHING, AND

THAT'S WHAT I DOES RIGHT NOW.

>> Nathan: YEAH, THEN WE SHOULD

DO IT -- THE THREE OF US, RIGHT?

>> Murderface: YEAH, LET'S DO

IT. >> Skwisgaar: YEAH, LET'S DO IT.

>> Toki: HEY, HOW COMES YOU DON'T ASK ME?

THE THREE? IT'S LIKE THE FOUR OF US.

>> Nathan: YOU'RE ALL THE WAY OVER THERE.

YOU -- WE COULDN'T EVEN SEE YOU.

>> Toki: I JUST HEARDS

EVERYTHING, AND I JUST WANTS TO

BE A PARTS OF IT, TOO!

>> Skwisgaar: TOKI, YOU'RES TOO

LATES. THAT'S WHAT YOU GET FOR TRYING

TO PLAY VIDEO GAMES.

>> Toki: I STANDS RIGHT HERE,

AND YOU JUST EXCLUDES ME ON

PURPOSE. YOU KNOW IT.

>> Nathan: THAT'S BAD P.R. RIGHT

THERE.

>> NOW, WE ALL KNOW DETHKLOK'S

MUSIC, BUT WE USUALLY DON'T SEE

YOU GUYS UNLESS YOU'RE RELEASING

A CD OR YOU'RE ON TOUR.

WHY THE SUDDEN CHANGE?

>> Pickles: WELL, I THINK, YOU

KNOW, THAT SOME PEOPLE THINK

THAT YOU CAN'T BE DOING THINGS

LIKE THAT BECAUSE, IT'S LIKE,

"OHH, YOU'RE GONNA SAY SOMETHING

THAT -- YOU DOUCHE BAG!"

>> LET ME ASK YOU, WHAT DOES THE

MOST SUCCESSFUL DRUMMER IN

HISTORY DO TO RELAX?

>> Pickles: [ MUMBLING ]

THAT'S A GOOD QUESTION.

WELL, YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES I GO

S-SIT DOWN.

SOMETIMES I-I SIT -- I LAY DOWN.

SOMETIMES I CLOSE MY EYES.

SOMETIMES I GET A BOOK, YOU

KNOW?

A-AND SOMETIMES I LOOK AT A TV

SCREEN.

SO, THAT WAS OKAY -- I MEAN --

RIGHT?

>> OKAY? [ LAUGHS ]

IT WAS GREAT.

>> Pickles: I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT

BE MAD BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, I-I

COULD TELL A COUPLE OF TIMES I

MIGHT HAVE BEEN SLURRING JUST A

LITTLE BIT 'CAUSE I HAD A DRINK

BEFOREHAND.

>> YOU'VE BEEN BEHIND THAT DRUM

KIT FOR WAY TOO LONG, PICKLES.

THIS IS YOUR TIME.

IT'S TIME FOR PICKLES.

>> Murderface: NOW, PUBLICITY IS

ALL ABOUT BEING SEEN.

>> Nathan: OKAY, OKAY, THAT'S A

GOOD POINT BECAUSE WHAT I WAS

GONNA SAY IS PUBLICITY IS ALL

ABOUT BEING SEEN.

>> Murderface: I THOUGHT I WAS

RUNNING THIS MEETING!

YOU JUST REPEATED!

>> Nathan: OH, I'M SORRY.

YOU'RE RIGHT -- PLEASE.

>> Murderface: WE NEED TO GET

OUR FACES TO WHERE EVERYBODY CAN

SEE US.

>> Skwisgaar: LIKES PICKLE ON

TV.

>> Murderface: EXACTLY, BUT

EVERYBODY GOES ON TV.

>> Nathan: YEAH, EVERYONE GOES

ON TV. EVERYONE DOES.

>> Murderface: YEAH, THAT'S MY

POINT. EVERYBODY GOES ON TV!

>> Nathan: EVERYONE'S ALREADY ON THERE.

WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO DO THAT?

>> Murderface: YES, OKAY.

>> Nathan: GO THE OTHER WAY.

>> Murderface: [ GROANS ]

YES, WE NEED TO GO WHERE --

>> Nathan: WHERE NOBODY'S GONE

YET. >> Toki: THE RADIOS!

>> Nathan: TOKI, GET OUT OF HERE!

YOU'RE NOT IN THE P.R. CLUB. >> Toki: IT'S THE STUPIDEST P.R.

CLUB! IT DOESN'T WORK!

>> Murderface: CAN YOU JUST --

I'M RUNNING THIS MEETING!

WE NEED TO GET SEEN SOMEWHERE

THAT'S NOT ON TV.

[BLEEP]

>> PICKLES THE DRUMMER'S NOW THE

MOST IN-DEMAND CELEBRITY ALIVE,

AND THAT'S AN AMAZING FEAT FOR

PICKLES, BUT ALMOST A BIGGER

FEAT FOR THE EXODUS P.R. FIRM --

NOW THE WORLD'S LARGEST.

THE REMAINING MEMBERS OF

DETHKLOK ARE GETTING IN ON THIS

ACTION, STARTING THEIR OWN

BRUTAL P.R. FIRM.

HEY, GOOD LUCK, BOYS.

THAT'S THE DETHKLOK MINUTE.

>> Murderface: NOW, STORE

OPENINGS ARE ALWAYS GOOD

EXPOSURE -- LOTS OF PRESS.

>> Toki: OH, I'M GONNA GETS ME A

JUICE WITH CARROTS AND GRAPES.

>> Murderface: OHH, TOKI.

>> Nathan: ARE WE SUPPOSED TO

SEND THIS PRESS RELEASES TO

THE PRESS? I MEAN, I THINK THAT'S WHY THEY

CALL IT A PRESS RELEASE.

AM I RIGHT?

>> Murderface: [ LAUGHS ]

YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW?

>> Nathan: NO, I DON'T.

>> Murderface: YOU REALLY DON'T

KNOW? >> HOLY [BLEEP]

YOU'RE NATHAN EXPLOSION!

>> Murderface: BEAT IT, KID.

HE'S NOT WHO YOU THINK I'M

SAYING HE ISN'T. IT'S NOT HIM, OKAY?

>> Nathan: BUT I THOUGHT WE WERE

SUPPOSED TO HAVE EXPOSURE.

>> Murderface: IF WORD GETS OUT

THAT WE'RE HERE, THE PRESS

WILL BE ALL OVER US, AND THAT'LL

JUST DEFEAT OUR PURPOSE.

>> Skwisgaar: GUYS, I GOTS AN

IDEAS. WE SHOULD PROMOTE SOMEWHERE'S

ELSE WHERE LIKES WHERE NO ONE

ELSE PROMOTEDS BEFORE!

[ SNAP! ]

>> AAH!

[ WIND HOWLING ]

>> I'VE, UH, BEEN LOOKING OVER

YOUR PURCHASES SINCE YOU STARTED

DOING YOUR OWN PUBLICITY.

YOU'VE SPENT $17 MILLION.

>> Murderface: SO?

>> I'M JUST SAYING I DON'T THINK

IT'S THE BEST USE OF YOUR MONEY.

IT HASN'T INCREASED SALES WHATSOEVER.

NICE WORK, GUYS. >> Nathan: WHAT ARE WE DOING

WRONG? I MEAN, LOOK, PICKLES IS

EVERYWHERE. >> Skwisgaar: WHAT'S HE GOT THAT

WE AIN'TS GOT? >> Toki: LOOKS AT THIS.

>> Murderface: PICKLES CAN'T

BAKE. HAVE YOU EVER HAD HIS

CHOCOLATE-COCONUT MACAROONS?

>> Pickles: HEY, GUYS.

>> Skwisgaar: HEY, LOOK, THAT'S

PICKLES, JUST LIKES ON THE

MAGAZINE! >> Nathan: HEY, PICKLES.

>> Toki: YEAH, YOU'S THE DRUMMER, RIGHT?

>> Murderface: LOOK, MY HAIR'S STANDING UP ON END.

>> Nathan: YEAH, HE'S SHORTER THAN I THOUGHT -- WAIT A MINUTE!

I ALREADY KNOW YOU. >> Pickles: I GOT US A GIG.

IT'S, UH, YOU KNOW, A FAVOR FOR

MY PUBLICIST. WHAT DO YOU THINK?

>> Nathan: OH, YEAH, WE'LL DO

IT. >> Toki: YOU BET!

>> Pickles: OH, THANKS, GUYS.

UH, I'LL SEE YA -- COOL.

>> IT'S BEEN SO BUSY LATELY,

PICKLES.

WE HAVEN'T HAD A CHANCE TO

REALLY TALK.

>> Pickles: OH, HEY, I GOT YOU A

GIFT. IT'S A CALENDAR.

YOU KNOW, IT'S THAT GUY WHO GETS

THOSE GRAY DOGS AND DRESSES THEM

UP IN CLOTHES, YOU KNOW,

HUMILIATES THEM.

>> THAT'S VERY SWEET, PICKLES,

HOWEVER, I NO LONGER HAVE ANY

USE FOR EARTH CALENDARS.

BUT NEVER MIND THAT.

>> Pickles: EARTH CALENDARS?

>> I HAVE A LITTLE SOMETHING FOR

YOU, TOO.

YOU WERE A GREAT FIND.

BECAUSE OF YOUR POPULARITY,

WE'VE RECRUITED A LOT OF

MEMBERS -- I MEAN CLIENTS.

>> Pickles: OKAY, THEN.

I'M GONNA GET GOING.

I'LL SEE YOU TONIGHT AT THE

SHOW. >> YES, TONIGHT.

DON'T BE LATE.

PICKLES.

>> Pickles: YEAH?

>> I'LL SEE YOU TONIGHT.

>> Pickles: OKA-A-Y.

GOODBYE.

>> Skwisgaar: WHAT DO THEY GOTS THERE, GRAPES DRINK?

>> Nathan: YEAH, THEY'RE DRINKING SOME [BLEEP] GRAPE

DRINK. IT'S AWESOME.

>> Murderface: THAT'S SOME PRETTY FANCY GRAPE DRINK.

>> Skwisgaar: HOW COME THEY GETS TO HAVE GRAPES DRINK?

>> Nathan: HOW COME WE CAN'T HAVE ANY [BLEEP] GRAPE DRINK?

THAT'S [BLEEP] NOT [BLEEP] FAIR.

>> PICKLES, YOU'RE LATE.

WE HAVE TO HURRY. >> Pickles: OKAY.

>> TIME IS RUNNING OUT! >> Pickles: OKAY.

>> THIS IS OUR DESTINY!

>> Pickles: HEY, LET'S JUST PLAY

THIS SHOW AND GET OUT OF HERE.

WE GOT ANY SONGS WITH "DESTINY"

IN THE TITLE?

>> Nathan: UM, NO, BUT I COULD

STICK IT IN. IT'S DOESN'T MATTER.

NO ONE CAN UNDERSTAND WHAT I'M

SAYING, ANYWAY.

[ METAL MUSIC PLAYS ]

♪ RACING THROUGH TIME ♪

♪ SOULS PRAY, LEAD BLIND

INTERSTELLAR MUTILATION ♪

♪ COMETS SPEED FORTH ♪

♪ BRING DEATH FOR EARTH TIME ♪

♪ FOR YOUR NEXT DESTINATION ♪

♪ GALACTIC DEATH HUNTS ♪

♪ FLIES ♪

♪ PUSHES THROUGH TIME/SPACE

DIMENSIONS ♪

♪ IT'S SEEKING BLOOD ♪

♪ FLESH, SOULS, AS SLAVES ♪

♪ TO TAKE INTO HELL ♪

♪ IN OUTER SPACE ♪

♪ YOUR TIME IS COMING TONIGHT ♪

♪ YOU'LL BE KILLED AT THE SPEED

OF LIGHT ♪

♪ DESTINY YOU CAN'T FIGHT ♪

♪ CRUSHED BY COMETS

TRANSMOGRIFIED ♪

♪ DEATH WILL BRING YOU NEW

LIFE ♪

♪ A SLAVE FOREVER ON A PLANET OF

DEATH ♪

♪ A THOUSAND YEARS SINCE THE

COMET TOOK FLIGHT ♪

♪ YOUR DESTINY IS PAIN FOREVER ♪

>> [ GURGLING ]

>> [ GURGLING ]

>> [ GURGLING ]

>> HOLY [BLEEP]

>> OH, BOY.

WHAT A GREAT DETHKLOK MINUTE.

HEY -- AAAH!