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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,169 --> 00:00:04,905 >> Announcer: FROM HOLLYWOOD -- 2 00:00:04,905 --> 00:00:06,540 IT'S "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE." 3 00:00:06,540 --> 00:00:07,674 TONIGHT -- 4 00:00:07,674 --> 00:00:08,742 NOAH WYLE, 5 00:00:08,742 --> 00:00:11,545 TIG NOTARO, 6 00:00:11,545 --> 00:00:12,613 PLUS MUSIC FROM RAPHAEL SAADIQ, 7 00:00:12,613 --> 00:00:15,215 MILES CATON, 8 00:00:15,215 --> 00:00:16,517 AND LUDWIG GORANSSON, 9 00:00:16,517 --> 00:00:22,589 WITH THE CLETONES. 10 00:00:22,589 --> 00:00:23,090 AND NOW -- JIMMY KIMMEL! 11 00:00:23,090 --> 00:00:24,825 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 12 00:00:24,825 --> 00:00:34,234 ♪ 13 00:00:34,234 --> 00:00:36,803 >> Jimmy: THANK YOU. 14 00:00:36,803 --> 00:00:38,171 THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 15 00:00:38,171 --> 00:00:41,241 HELLO, I'M JIMMY, I'M THE HOST. 16 00:00:41,241 --> 00:00:42,543 GREAT TO HAVE YOU HERE. 17 00:00:42,543 --> 00:00:44,545 THANKS FOR COMING. 18 00:00:44,545 --> 00:00:48,382 THANKS FOR JOINING US HERE AT 19 00:00:48,382 --> 00:00:51,652 OUR HEADQUARTERS IN LOS ANGELES. 20 00:00:51,652 --> 00:00:53,153 I'M GOING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING, 21 00:00:53,153 --> 00:00:53,687 THERE'S A LOT GOING ON. 22 00:00:53,687 --> 00:00:54,588 SOME VERY SERIOUS STUFF. 23 00:00:54,588 --> 00:00:55,689 NOT JUST HERE, BUT AROUND THE 24 00:00:55,689 --> 00:00:58,926 WORLD. 25 00:00:58,926 --> 00:00:59,526 AND YET I CANNOT HELP BUT TO 26 00:00:59,526 --> 00:01:00,160 STOP EVERYTHING WHEN THERE ARE 27 00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:01,161 MONKEYS ON THE LOOSE. 28 00:01:01,161 --> 00:01:02,296 NOT HERE. 29 00:01:02,296 --> 00:01:04,397 YOU CAN RELAX. 30 00:01:04,397 --> 00:01:05,532 THE LOOSE MONKEYS HAVE BEEN 31 00:01:05,532 --> 00:01:07,167 SPOTTED IN AND AROUND ST. LOUIS. 32 00:01:07,167 --> 00:01:11,638 OR HAVE THEY? 33 00:01:11,638 --> 00:01:12,139 THIS IS A WEIRD STORY. 34 00:01:12,139 --> 00:01:12,940 YESTERDAY WE LEARNED THAT A 35 00:01:12,940 --> 00:01:13,540 TROOP OF VERVET MONKEYS WERE 36 00:01:13,540 --> 00:01:14,575 SEEN AT A PARK AND IN OTHER 37 00:01:14,575 --> 00:01:15,642 PARTS OF NORTHERN ST. LOUIS. 38 00:01:15,642 --> 00:01:19,346 BUT AS WORD SPREAD AND THE 39 00:01:19,346 --> 00:01:20,647 LOCAL AUTHORITIES THERE BEGAN TO 40 00:01:20,647 --> 00:01:21,448 INVESTIGATE, A FLOOD OF PHOTOS 41 00:01:21,448 --> 00:01:22,549 AND VIDEOS STARTED TO APPEAR 42 00:01:22,549 --> 00:01:24,651 ONLINE. 43 00:01:24,651 --> 00:01:27,621 AT FIRST THEY SEEMED LIKE REAL 44 00:01:27,621 --> 00:01:30,390 PHOTOGRAPHS, BUT THEN THE 45 00:01:30,390 --> 00:01:32,993 MONKEYS WERE WEARING CARDINALS 46 00:01:32,993 --> 00:01:35,162 JERSEYS AND FACE PAINT. 47 00:01:35,162 --> 00:01:35,696 TO THE POINT WHERE ANIMAL 48 00:01:35,696 --> 00:01:36,296 CONTROL DIDN'T KNOW WHAT WAS 49 00:01:36,296 --> 00:01:37,397 REAL AND WHAT WAS FAKE. 50 00:01:37,397 --> 00:01:38,532 THIS IS VIDEO OF ONE OF THE 51 00:01:38,532 --> 00:01:43,236 ESCAPEES, OR AT LEAST IT APPEARS 52 00:01:43,236 --> 00:01:46,440 TO BE VIDEO OF ONE OF THE 53 00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:47,541 WE HONESTLY HAVE NO IDEA OF 54 00:01:47,541 --> 00:01:48,108 WHETHER THIS IS REAL OR AI. 55 00:01:48,108 --> 00:01:50,477 WHAT DO YOU THINK, GUILLERMO? 56 00:01:50,477 --> 00:01:52,613 >> Guillermo: I THINK IT'S REAL. 57 00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:55,582 >> Jimmy: I THINK IT'S REAL, 58 00:01:55,582 --> 00:01:57,184 TOO, BUT FOR THE FIRST TIME 59 00:01:57,184 --> 00:01:58,518 EVER, WE'RE NOT SURE THAT'S A 60 00:01:58,518 --> 00:01:59,519 REAL MONKEY OR NOT. 61 00:02:00,019 --> 00:02:00,019 CONFUSING, THE ST. LOUIS 62 00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:01,088 DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH HAD TO ASK 63 00:02:01,088 --> 00:02:01,722 RESIDENTS TO KNOCK IT OFF WITH 64 00:02:01,722 --> 00:02:04,658 ALL THE FAKE PHOTOS. 65 00:02:04,658 --> 00:02:07,461 >> YOU HAVING A HARD TIME 66 00:02:07,461 --> 00:02:09,496 FIGURING OUT THE MONKEYS BECAUSE 67 00:02:09,496 --> 00:02:11,665 OF THE AI PHOTOSHOPPED PHOTOS? 68 00:02:11,665 --> 00:02:14,901 >> WE RECEIVED A LARGE AMOUNT OF 69 00:02:14,901 --> 00:02:15,869 INFORMATION FROM THE COMMUNITY 70 00:02:15,869 --> 00:02:19,406 BUT IT WAS A CHALLENGE VERIFYING 71 00:02:19,406 --> 00:02:21,408 THE AUTHENTICITY OF THE 72 00:02:21,908 --> 00:02:24,478 >> ARE WE SURE THE MONKEYS ARE 73 00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:27,347 >> WE HAD VERIFICATION ON ONE 74 00:02:27,847 --> 00:02:28,615 >> Jimmy: BY THE WAY, 75 00:02:28,615 --> 00:02:29,216 I THINK ALL PRESS CONFERENCES 76 00:02:29,216 --> 00:02:30,017 SHOULD INCLUDE THE PHRASE -- ARE 77 00:02:30,017 --> 00:02:30,617 WE 100% SURE THE MONKEYS ARE 78 00:02:30,617 --> 00:02:34,221 REAL? 79 00:02:34,221 --> 00:02:36,623 >> THE BEST ADVICE IS CONTACT 80 00:02:36,623 --> 00:02:39,526 THE BUREAU AND LET US KNOW THE 81 00:02:39,526 --> 00:02:40,894 LOCATION OF THE MONKEY TO 82 00:02:40,894 --> 00:02:42,863 RESPOND AND CONTAIN. 83 00:02:42,863 --> 00:02:44,498 PLEASE DON'T INTERACT WITH THE 84 00:02:44,498 --> 00:02:46,533 MONKEYS, THEY'RE UNPREDICTABLE, 85 00:02:46,533 --> 00:02:47,634 LETTING US KNOW WHERE THEY'RE 86 00:02:47,634 --> 00:02:51,038 LOCATED IS THE BEST NEXT STEP. 87 00:02:51,038 --> 00:02:52,272 >> Jimmy: I DON'T THINK THAT ONE 88 00:02:52,772 --> 00:02:52,772 I HAVE A MESSAGE TO ANYONE WHO'S 89 00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:53,674 POSTING FAKE AI MONKEY 90 00:02:53,674 --> 00:02:54,241 SIGHTINGS. 91 00:02:54,241 --> 00:02:54,875 NUMBER ONE, YOU ARE OBSTRUCTING 92 00:02:54,875 --> 00:02:55,876 AN ACTIVE INVESTIGATION. 93 00:02:55,876 --> 00:02:58,645 AND TWO, IT IS VERY FUNNY. 94 00:02:58,645 --> 00:02:59,713 THIS AFTERNOON THE DEPARTMENT OF 95 00:02:59,713 --> 00:03:00,814 HEALTH ANNOUNCED THAT THEY HAVE 96 00:03:00,814 --> 00:03:01,381 CEASED THEIR SEARCH FOR THE 97 00:03:01,381 --> 00:03:03,550 MONKEYS. 98 00:03:03,550 --> 00:03:06,553 WHICH MEANS EITHER THE ANIMALS 99 00:03:06,553 --> 00:03:08,288 ARE STILL OUT THERE SOMEWHERE 100 00:03:08,788 --> 00:03:10,323 GAVE UP OR THEY'RE DEAD. 101 00:03:10,323 --> 00:03:10,857 THEY DON'T WANT TO SAY IT. 102 00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:12,492 OR THEY NEVER EXISTED AT ALL. 103 00:03:12,492 --> 00:03:13,126 LIKE SOME KIND OF MONKEY VERSION 104 00:03:13,626 --> 00:03:15,762 AND THEN THERE WAS ANOTHER 105 00:03:15,762 --> 00:03:20,300 PRIMATE SIGHTING, AN ORANGUTAN 106 00:03:20,300 --> 00:03:22,602 WHO POPPED UP IN A VERY 107 00:03:22,602 --> 00:03:24,504 POPULATED AREA OF DETROIT. 108 00:03:24,504 --> 00:03:26,606 >> ISN'T IT NICE TO HAVE A 109 00:03:26,606 --> 00:03:29,810 PRESIDENT WHO CAN GO -- YOU'RE 110 00:03:29,810 --> 00:03:31,545 LUCKY I ALLOW YOU IN THE ROOM 111 00:03:31,545 --> 00:03:32,412 WITH ME. 112 00:03:32,412 --> 00:03:33,313 IT'S NOT VERY NICE. 113 00:03:33,313 --> 00:03:35,849 YOU GOT BIT, IT WAS OVER. 114 00:03:35,849 --> 00:03:37,851 BYE-BYE EVERYBODY, THE MOSQUITO 115 00:03:37,851 --> 00:03:39,553 AND THE SNAKE. 116 00:03:39,553 --> 00:03:41,321 I DON'T KNOW IF WE SHOULD HAVE 117 00:03:41,321 --> 00:03:42,489 DONE VENEZUELA, I DON'T KNOW. 118 00:03:42,489 --> 00:03:45,058 I TOLD THEM NOT TO DO IT. 119 00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:46,526 DONALD TRUMP THINKS HE'S HOT 120 00:03:47,026 --> 00:03:50,630 THEY RIGGED THE ELECTION ON YOU. 121 00:03:50,630 --> 00:03:54,901 I WON THE ELECTORAL COLLEGE YOU 122 00:03:55,401 --> 00:03:56,903 SECURE THE BORDER. 123 00:03:56,903 --> 00:04:00,006 AH, AH. 124 00:04:00,506 --> 00:04:02,209 LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THANK YOU 125 00:04:02,209 --> 00:04:02,876 VERY MUCH. 126 00:04:02,876 --> 00:04:04,077 >> Jimmy: THAT LITTLE ROUTINE AT 127 00:04:04,077 --> 00:04:07,080 THE END WAS OUR PRESIDENT 128 00:04:07,580 --> 00:04:07,580 FUN OF OUR FORMER PRESIDENT, JOE 129 00:04:08,448 --> 00:04:09,082 WHEN HE GOES LOW, HE THEN GOES A 130 00:04:09,082 --> 00:04:10,350 LITTLE BIT LOWER. 131 00:04:10,350 --> 00:04:11,418 KING CON WAS IN THE MOTOR CITY 132 00:04:11,418 --> 00:04:15,188 TODAY. 133 00:04:15,188 --> 00:04:18,158 HE GAVE THE FINGER AND SAID EFF 134 00:04:18,158 --> 00:04:19,192 YOU TO A WORKER 135 00:04:19,192 --> 00:04:19,726 AT FORD WHO CALLED HIM A 136 00:04:20,226 --> 00:04:20,793 AND THEN TRUMP DELIVERED ANOTHER 137 00:04:20,793 --> 00:04:22,496 BANANAS SPEECH AT THE DETROIT 138 00:04:22,996 --> 00:04:23,597 WHERE HE ATTEMPTED TO CONVINCE 139 00:04:23,597 --> 00:04:24,631 THOSE IN ATTENDANCE THAT THE 140 00:04:24,631 --> 00:04:25,699 PROTESTS IN MINNEAPOLIS ARE NOT 141 00:04:25,699 --> 00:04:31,037 REAL. 142 00:04:31,037 --> 00:04:31,671 THEY'RE FAKE! 143 00:04:31,671 --> 00:04:33,707 >> ONE OF THE REASONS THEY'RE 144 00:04:33,707 --> 00:04:36,343 DOING THESE FAKE RIOTS -- I MEAN 145 00:04:36,343 --> 00:04:38,678 THEY'RE JUST TERRIBLE. 146 00:04:38,678 --> 00:04:40,080 SO FAKE, SHAME, SHAME, SHAME. 147 00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:41,648 THAT'S ALL PRACTICED. 148 00:04:41,648 --> 00:04:45,051 THEY GO TO PRACTICE -- AREAS, 149 00:04:45,051 --> 00:04:46,686 THEY TAKE HOTEL ROOMS AND 150 00:04:46,686 --> 00:04:48,755 PRACTICE TOGETHER. 151 00:04:48,755 --> 00:04:49,256 >> Jimmy: THAT'S RIGHT. 152 00:04:49,256 --> 00:04:50,190 THEY PRACTICE IN HOTEL ROOMS, 153 00:04:50,190 --> 00:04:50,757 THEY ORDER ROOM SERVICE AND 154 00:04:51,257 --> 00:04:53,393 IT'S LIKE MOTEL JANUARY 6. 155 00:04:53,393 --> 00:04:54,961 WHERE THEY DO IT. 156 00:04:54,961 --> 00:04:57,831 BY THE WAY, THEY'RE NOT RIOTS, 157 00:04:57,831 --> 00:05:02,903 THEY'RE REAL. 158 00:05:02,903 --> 00:05:03,503 FIRST THEY WANT US TO BELIEVE 159 00:05:03,503 --> 00:05:07,307 THAT WE DID NOT SEE WHAT WE SAW 160 00:05:07,307 --> 00:05:08,208 HAPPEN TO RENEE GOOD. 161 00:05:08,208 --> 00:05:08,842 NOW HE WANTS US TO BELIEVE THE 162 00:05:08,842 --> 00:05:10,110 PROTESTS ARE NOT REAL. 163 00:05:10,110 --> 00:05:10,677 IT'S LIKE THE EMPEROR'S NEW 164 00:05:11,177 --> 00:05:11,678 HE'S TELLING US WE'RE NAKED. 165 00:05:11,678 --> 00:05:13,980 WHILE THEY DO THEIR BEST TO 166 00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:14,948 COVER EVERYTHING UP. 167 00:05:14,948 --> 00:05:15,448 NOT ONLY HAS THE TRUMP 168 00:05:15,448 --> 00:05:16,049 ADMINISTRATION ICED LOCAL 169 00:05:16,049 --> 00:05:17,184 AUTHORITIES OUT OF THE FBI'S 170 00:05:17,184 --> 00:05:18,251 INVESTIGATION INTO THE KILLING 171 00:05:18,251 --> 00:05:19,886 OF RENEE GOOD, SIX SENIOR 172 00:05:19,886 --> 00:05:21,521 PROSECUTORS IN MINNESOTA JUST 173 00:05:21,521 --> 00:05:22,656 STEPPED DOWN AFTER BEING 174 00:05:22,656 --> 00:05:23,723 PRESSURED BY THE JUSTICE 175 00:05:23,723 --> 00:05:25,358 DEPARTMENT TO INVESTIGATE RENEE 176 00:05:25,358 --> 00:05:26,960 GOOD'S WIDOW, WHO WAS A 177 00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:30,397 PASSENGER IN THE CAR. 178 00:05:30,897 --> 00:05:31,765 THEY'RE INVESTIGATING THE 179 00:05:31,765 --> 00:05:32,299 VICTIMS INSTEAD OF THE 180 00:05:32,299 --> 00:05:33,433 PERPETRATOR. 181 00:05:33,433 --> 00:05:37,637 AND THIS MORNING, TRUMP POSTED 182 00:05:37,637 --> 00:05:38,471 -- DO THE PEOPLE OF 183 00:05:38,471 --> 00:05:40,974 MINNESOTA REALLY WANT TO LIVE IN 184 00:05:40,974 --> 00:05:41,608 A COMMUNITY IN WHICH THERE ARE 185 00:05:41,608 --> 00:05:43,210 THOUSANDS OF ALREADY CONVICTED 186 00:05:43,210 --> 00:05:44,845 MURDERERS, DRUG DEALERS AND 187 00:05:44,845 --> 00:05:45,946 ADDICTS, RAPISTS, VIOLENT 188 00:05:45,946 --> 00:05:48,114 RELEASED AND ESCAPED PRISONERS, 189 00:05:48,114 --> 00:05:51,218 DANGEROUS PEOPLE FROM FOREIGN 190 00:05:51,218 --> 00:05:51,852 MENTAL INSTITUTIONS AND INSANE 191 00:05:51,852 --> 00:05:52,919 ASYLUMS AND OTHER DEADLY 192 00:05:52,919 --> 00:05:54,521 CRIMINALS TOO DANGEROUS TO EVEN 193 00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:57,924 MENTION? 194 00:05:57,924 --> 00:05:59,226 WHAT COULD BE MORE DANGEROUS 195 00:05:59,226 --> 00:06:00,060 THAN A MURDERER/RAPIST ESCAPED 196 00:06:00,060 --> 00:06:02,262 FROM AN INSANE ASYLUM? 197 00:06:02,262 --> 00:06:04,898 GODZILLA? 198 00:06:05,398 --> 00:06:07,067 FEAR NOT, GREAT PEOPLE OF 199 00:06:07,067 --> 00:06:08,768 MINNESOTA, THE DAY OF RECKONING 200 00:06:08,768 --> 00:06:12,005 AND RETRIBUTION IS COMING. 201 00:06:12,005 --> 00:06:13,039 DOES ANYONE ELSE MISS THE DAYS 202 00:06:13,039 --> 00:06:15,208 WHEN THE PRESIDENT DIDN'T SOUND 203 00:06:15,208 --> 00:06:15,809 LIKE THE UNDERTAKER AT 204 00:06:15,809 --> 00:06:19,012 WRESTLEMANIA? 205 00:06:19,512 --> 00:06:20,647 SERIOUSLY, WOULD SOMEONE GET 206 00:06:20,647 --> 00:06:21,281 THIS HYPERGLYCEMIC 5-YEAR-OLD A 207 00:06:21,281 --> 00:06:22,315 FIDGET SPINNER? 208 00:06:22,315 --> 00:06:23,383 HE NEEDS SOMETHING TO DO WITH 209 00:06:23,383 --> 00:06:32,225 HIS HANDS. 210 00:06:32,725 --> 00:06:32,725 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 211 00:06:33,059 --> 00:06:34,394 I REALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS 212 00:06:34,894 --> 00:06:34,894 IS RAMBLING ABOUT, BUT THE 213 00:06:35,362 --> 00:06:38,732 PROTESTS IN MINNEAPOLIS ARE REAL 214 00:06:38,732 --> 00:06:43,169 ENOUGH FOR THE MAGAVERSE MEDIA 215 00:06:43,169 --> 00:06:43,670 TO DESCEND UPON THEM. 216 00:06:43,670 --> 00:06:44,271 THIS FOX WANNABE CALLED "REAL 217 00:06:44,271 --> 00:06:45,672 AMERICA'S VOICE" SENT A REPORTER 218 00:06:45,672 --> 00:06:46,206 TO THE SCENE. 219 00:06:46,206 --> 00:06:46,806 STICK WITH THIS BECAUSE IT'S 220 00:06:46,806 --> 00:06:47,440 KIND OF ANNOYING AT FIRST, BUT 221 00:06:47,440 --> 00:06:48,041 IT GETS VERY FUNNY AS IT GOES 222 00:06:48,041 --> 00:06:50,043 ALONG. 223 00:06:50,043 --> 00:06:52,746 >> I'M JUST TRYING TO HAVE AN 224 00:06:52,746 --> 00:06:53,647 INTELLIGENT CONVERSATION. 225 00:06:53,647 --> 00:06:55,815 WE'RE JUST TRYING TO HAVE AN 226 00:06:55,815 --> 00:06:56,850 INTELLIGENT CONVERSATION. 227 00:06:56,850 --> 00:06:59,819 >> I'M A CALM MAN, I'M A BIG AND 228 00:07:00,319 --> 00:07:01,354 >> I DON'T ACT THIS WAY. 229 00:07:01,354 --> 00:07:05,558 >> I'M A BIG AND TALL MAN. 230 00:07:05,558 --> 00:07:07,894 >> YOU WANT TO ENGAGE IN 231 00:07:07,894 --> 00:07:08,628 INTELLIGENT CONVERSATION? 232 00:07:08,628 --> 00:07:10,196 THIS IS WHAT WE'RE DEALING WITH 233 00:07:10,196 --> 00:07:11,798 ON THE GROUND. 234 00:07:11,798 --> 00:07:18,571 >> HE'S A BADASS. 235 00:07:19,071 --> 00:07:21,408 >> I JUST WANT TO ASK, DO YOU 236 00:07:21,408 --> 00:07:23,910 BELIEVE IN ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION. 237 00:07:23,910 --> 00:07:25,679 ♪ LOOK AT THIS BIG MAN 238 00:07:25,679 --> 00:07:27,981 >> DO YOU BELIEVE THAT TAXPAYERS 239 00:07:27,981 --> 00:07:31,051 SHOULD BE FUNDING ILLEGAL 240 00:07:31,051 --> 00:07:31,685 MEDICAL CARE. 241 00:07:31,685 --> 00:07:33,119 >> HE'S SO INTELLIGENT. 242 00:07:33,119 --> 00:07:34,254 THIS MAN, HE'S GOT NOTHING TO 243 00:07:34,254 --> 00:07:36,256 SAY! 244 00:07:36,256 --> 00:07:39,526 >> Jimmy: BACK TO YOU, JEFF. 245 00:07:39,526 --> 00:07:44,230 WITH ALL THIS GOING ON HERE, ALL 246 00:07:44,230 --> 00:07:46,433 THE CHAOS TRUMP'S CREATED AT 247 00:07:46,433 --> 00:07:47,233 HOME, HE'S STILL TALKING ABOUT 248 00:07:47,733 --> 00:07:53,640 HE STILL BELIEVES THAT DENMARK 249 00:07:53,640 --> 00:07:55,875 SHOULD SEVER THEIR 300-PLUS-YEAR 250 00:07:55,875 --> 00:07:56,509 RELATIONSHIP WITH GREENLAND AND 251 00:07:56,509 --> 00:07:57,310 TURN IT OVER TO US. 252 00:07:57,310 --> 00:07:57,944 THE ONLY PROBLEM IS, TRUMP NEVER 253 00:07:57,944 --> 00:07:59,212 BOTHERED TO ASK GREENLAND WHAT 254 00:07:59,212 --> 00:08:02,215 THEY PREFER IN THIS WEIRD 255 00:08:02,215 --> 00:08:05,185 CUSTODY BATTLE HE CREATED. 256 00:08:05,185 --> 00:08:08,254 >> THE PREMIER OF GREENLAND SAID 257 00:08:08,254 --> 00:08:10,991 TODAY WE PREFER TO STAY WITH 258 00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:13,126 DO YOU SEE THAT AS THE FINAL 259 00:08:13,626 --> 00:08:14,728 >> WHO SAID THAT? 260 00:08:14,728 --> 00:08:16,563 >> THE PREMIER OF GREENLAND. 261 00:08:16,563 --> 00:08:18,298 >> WELL, THAT'S THEIR PROBLEM. 262 00:08:18,298 --> 00:08:20,000 I DISAGREE WITH HIM. 263 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,835 I DON'T KNOW WHO HE IS, DON'T 264 00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:22,669 KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT HIM, BUT 265 00:08:22,669 --> 00:08:25,071 THAT'S GOING TO BE A BIG PROBLEM 266 00:08:25,071 --> 00:08:26,206 FOR HIM. 267 00:08:26,206 --> 00:08:28,708 >> Jimmy: HE DOESN'T EVEN THOUGH 268 00:08:28,708 --> 00:08:31,311 KNOW WHO RUNS THE COUNTRY HE 269 00:08:31,811 --> 00:08:36,549 THAT'S OUR GENGHIS DON.KNOW WHO 270 00:08:37,049 --> 00:08:37,049 THAT'S OUR GENGHIS DON. 271 00:08:37,384 --> 00:08:38,018 WE ARE COMING UP ON A FULL YEAR 272 00:08:38,018 --> 00:08:38,650 INTO TRUMP'S SECOND TERM AND SO 273 00:08:38,650 --> 00:08:40,553 FAR, IT'S SOMEHOW SO MUCH WORSE 274 00:08:40,553 --> 00:08:41,988 THAN I THINK ANY OF US THOUGHT 275 00:08:42,488 --> 00:08:42,488 I WILL SAY THIS, HE HAS BEEN 276 00:08:42,889 --> 00:08:43,523 RUNNING THE COUNTRY LIKE ONE OF 277 00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:44,157 HIS BUSINESSES, INTO BANKRUPTCY. 278 00:08:44,157 --> 00:08:47,227 ACCORDING TO THE BUREAU OF LABOR 279 00:08:47,227 --> 00:08:47,827 AND STATISTICS, THE PRICES HE 280 00:08:47,827 --> 00:08:49,462 SAID HE'D GET DOWN ON DAY ONE 281 00:08:49,462 --> 00:08:51,131 ARE UP 2.7% FROM A YEAR AGO. 282 00:08:51,131 --> 00:08:52,232 THOUGH, IN FAIRNESS, THAT NUMBER 283 00:08:52,232 --> 00:08:54,968 IS EXPECTED TO GO DOWN AFTER HE 284 00:08:54,968 --> 00:08:55,602 ARRESTS EVERYONE WHO WORKS FOR 285 00:08:55,602 --> 00:08:56,102 THE BUREAU OF LABOR AND 286 00:08:56,102 --> 00:08:57,103 STATISTICS. 287 00:08:57,103 --> 00:08:58,772 BUT ONE THING TRUMP HAS BEEN 288 00:08:58,772 --> 00:09:00,407 DOING VERY WELL IS DISTRACTING 289 00:09:00,407 --> 00:09:02,542 US FROM THE FACT THAT HIS 290 00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:03,576 JUSTICE DEPARTMENT STILL HASN'T 291 00:09:03,576 --> 00:09:07,213 RELEASED MORE THAN 2 MILLION 292 00:09:07,213 --> 00:09:08,214 EPSTEIN FILES. 293 00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:08,848 BUT FEAR NOT, THE CHAIR OF THE 294 00:09:08,848 --> 00:09:10,083 HOUSE OVERSIGHT COMMITTEE, JAMES 295 00:09:10,083 --> 00:09:11,217 "GOMER" COMER, IS DEMANDING THAT 296 00:09:11,217 --> 00:09:12,285 THE PRESIDENT BE HELD 297 00:09:12,285 --> 00:09:14,220 ACCOUNTABLE. 298 00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:17,357 JUST NOT THIS PRESIDENT. 299 00:09:17,357 --> 00:09:19,559 >> AS A RESULT OF BILL CLINTON 300 00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:22,429 NOT SHOWING UP FOR HIS LAWFUL 301 00:09:22,429 --> 00:09:24,597 SUBPOENA, AGAIN, VOTED ON 302 00:09:24,597 --> 00:09:26,132 UNANIMOUSLY BY THE COMMITTEE IN 303 00:09:26,132 --> 00:09:28,501 A BIPARTISAN MANNER, WE WILL 304 00:09:28,501 --> 00:09:30,937 MOVE IN THE HOUSE OVERSIGHT 305 00:09:30,937 --> 00:09:32,205 COMMITTEE TO HOLD FORMER 306 00:09:32,205 --> 00:09:34,941 PRESIDENT CLINTON IN CONTEMPT OF 307 00:09:35,441 --> 00:09:35,975 >> Jimmy: WELL, I'M SURE BASED 308 00:09:35,975 --> 00:09:37,644 ON THE FACT THAT HIS NAME IS ALL 309 00:09:37,644 --> 00:09:41,514 OVER THE FILES WE'VE SEEN SO 310 00:09:41,514 --> 00:09:43,516 FAR, IF HE'S BRINGING CLINTON 311 00:09:43,516 --> 00:09:44,584 IN, HE'LL BRING TRUMP IN FOR 312 00:09:44,584 --> 00:09:47,120 QUESTIONING, TOO. 313 00:09:47,120 --> 00:09:49,722 >> GOING TO BRING DONALD TRUMP 314 00:09:49,722 --> 00:09:52,992 IN FOR AN INTERVIEW? 315 00:09:52,992 --> 00:09:55,228 >> WELL, PRESIDENT TRUMP HAS 316 00:09:55,228 --> 00:09:56,563 ANSWERED THOUSANDS OF QUESTIONS 317 00:09:56,563 --> 00:09:58,498 ABOUT JEFFREY EPSTEIN. 318 00:09:58,498 --> 00:10:00,900 WELL, YOU ALL ASK HIM QUESTIONS 319 00:10:00,900 --> 00:10:03,236 EVERY DAY, HE ANSWERS QUESTIONS 320 00:10:03,736 --> 00:10:03,736 >> Jimmy: RIGHT. 321 00:10:03,870 --> 00:10:08,108 WHAT WOULD WE EVEN ASK HIM? 322 00:10:08,108 --> 00:10:11,277 WHAT DID YOU AND EPSTEIN DO 323 00:10:11,777 --> 00:10:14,814 I'M NOT ASKING HIM THAT, YOU ASK 324 00:10:15,314 --> 00:10:17,750 I GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE. 325 00:10:17,750 --> 00:10:19,052 AND THEN WE HAVE THAT DOPE, PETE 326 00:10:19,552 --> 00:10:19,552 WHO MAY ACTUALLY HAVE COMMITTED 327 00:10:19,919 --> 00:10:22,255 EVEN MORE WAR CRIMES THAN 328 00:10:22,755 --> 00:10:23,890 MULTIPLE OFFICIALS CONFIRMED TO 329 00:10:23,890 --> 00:10:24,491 THE "NEW YORK TIMES" THAT THE 330 00:10:24,491 --> 00:10:25,125 PLANE USED IN THOSE BOAT ATTACKS 331 00:10:25,125 --> 00:10:25,758 WAS NOT PAINTED IN A TRADITIONAL 332 00:10:25,758 --> 00:10:27,227 MILITARY STYLE. 333 00:10:27,227 --> 00:10:27,861 WHICH VIOLATES THE LAWS OF ARMED 334 00:10:27,861 --> 00:10:29,362 CONFLICT. 335 00:10:29,362 --> 00:10:31,631 YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO DISGUISE A 336 00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:35,668 WAR PLANE AS A PASSENGER PLANE 337 00:10:35,668 --> 00:10:37,170 OR ANY OTHER KIND OF PLANE 338 00:10:37,170 --> 00:10:40,540 BECAUSE WE DON'T WANT OUR 339 00:10:40,540 --> 00:10:43,243 ENEMIES SHOOTING AT A FEDEX OR 340 00:10:43,243 --> 00:10:43,743 DELTA FLIGHT. 341 00:10:43,743 --> 00:10:44,377 IT'S A WAR CRIME CALLED PERFIDY. 342 00:10:44,377 --> 00:10:45,011 THESE GUYS ARE COMMITTING CRIMES 343 00:10:45,011 --> 00:10:47,680 WE NEVER EVEN HEARD OF BEFORE. 344 00:10:47,680 --> 00:10:51,184 I'VE NEVER EVEN HEARD THAT WORD, 345 00:10:51,684 --> 00:10:51,684 NOT ONLY ARE WE GOING TO NEED A 346 00:10:52,051 --> 00:10:53,887 NUREMBERG TRIAL AT THE END OF 347 00:10:53,887 --> 00:10:54,454 THIS, WE MIGHT NEED A BACON 348 00:10:54,454 --> 00:10:56,589 DOUBLE NUREMBERG WITH CHEESE. 349 00:10:56,589 --> 00:10:58,825 PART OF THE REASON THE PENTAGON 350 00:10:58,825 --> 00:11:00,460 KEEPS RUNNING AFOUL OF THE LAW 351 00:11:00,460 --> 00:11:02,061 IS BECAUSE PETE HEGSETH FIRED A 352 00:11:02,061 --> 00:11:03,196 LOT OF THE MILITARY LAWYERS, 353 00:11:03,196 --> 00:11:08,434 WHICH ARE KNOWN AS JAGS. 354 00:11:08,434 --> 00:11:11,171 YOU KNOW, AFTER HE'S DONE WITH 355 00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:13,740 COMING FOR NCIS. 356 00:11:13,740 --> 00:11:14,274 MAKE NO MISTAKE ABOUT IT. 357 00:11:14,274 --> 00:11:14,841 HEGSETH DROPPED BY LOCKHEED 358 00:11:14,841 --> 00:11:15,441 MARTIN IN FORT WORTH TODAY TO 359 00:11:15,441 --> 00:11:16,476 FIRE ANOTHER ROUND IN HIS WAR 360 00:11:16,476 --> 00:11:18,778 AGAINST WOKE. 361 00:11:18,778 --> 00:11:21,714 >> HE WANT TO GET RID OF THE 362 00:11:21,714 --> 00:11:23,249 DISTRACTIONS AND DEBRIS. 363 00:11:23,249 --> 00:11:30,623 NO MORE DEI, NO MORE DUDES IN 364 00:11:30,623 --> 00:11:31,691 DRESSES. 365 00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:33,126 >> Jimmy: YOU GOT TO READ THE 366 00:11:33,126 --> 00:11:36,796 ROOM, YOU KNOW? 367 00:11:37,296 --> 00:11:37,864 THE ROGUE'S GALLERY THAT MAKES 368 00:11:37,864 --> 00:11:41,134 UP TRUMP'S CABINET NOW, YOU 369 00:11:41,134 --> 00:11:42,402 REALIZE WE HAD IT KIND OF GOOD 370 00:11:42,902 --> 00:11:42,902 REMEMBER TRUMP'S FORMER 371 00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:44,037 SECRETARY OF HOUSING AND URBAN 372 00:11:44,037 --> 00:11:44,604 DEVELOPMENT? 373 00:11:44,604 --> 00:11:47,307 DR. BEN CARSON? 374 00:11:47,307 --> 00:11:49,709 DR. BEN CARSON HAS A NEW JOB -- 375 00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:53,279 WITH THE USDA. 376 00:11:53,279 --> 00:11:59,485 >> THREE YEARS FOR WHOLE MILK. 377 00:11:59,485 --> 00:12:02,288 GOOD STUFF. 378 00:12:02,288 --> 00:12:03,389 >> Jimmy: I'M GLAD HE'S BACK, I 379 00:12:03,389 --> 00:12:05,391 MISSED HIM. 380 00:12:05,891 --> 00:12:06,426 YOU KNOW, HE'S BEEN ASLEEP FOR 381 00:12:06,426 --> 00:12:08,027 THE PAST FIVE YEARS. 382 00:12:08,027 --> 00:12:09,128 AT LEAST WE AREN'T AT WAR WITH 383 00:12:09,128 --> 00:12:11,231 MILK, I GUESS. 384 00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:13,099 DONALD TRUMP RIGHT NOW IS AS 385 00:12:13,099 --> 00:12:14,033 UNPOPULAR AS ANY PRESIDENT SINCE 386 00:12:14,033 --> 00:12:16,736 NIXON. 387 00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:18,972 HE HAS A 54% DISAPPROVAL RATING. 388 00:12:18,972 --> 00:12:21,140 BUT SOMEHOW THERE ARE STILL 40% 389 00:12:21,140 --> 00:12:23,309 OF AMERICANS WHO SUPPORT HIM. 390 00:12:23,309 --> 00:12:26,212 WHICH IS HARD TO UNDERSTAND 391 00:12:26,212 --> 00:12:28,881 UNTIL YOU GET TO THE BOTTOM OF 392 00:12:28,881 --> 00:12:31,084 HOW MANY OF THEM STAY POSITIVE. 393 00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:33,419 >> EXPLOSIONS RINGING OUT IN 394 00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:33,987 VENEZUELA'S CAPITAL CITY. 395 00:12:33,987 --> 00:12:36,122 >> MASSIVE RALLY FILLING THE 396 00:12:36,122 --> 00:12:37,223 STREETS OF MINNEAPOLIS TODAY. 397 00:12:37,223 --> 00:12:39,626 >> IT'S NOW OR NEVER TO AVOID 398 00:12:39,626 --> 00:12:41,694 THE WORST IMPACTS OF CLIMATE 399 00:12:42,194 --> 00:12:45,064 >> AMERICA FACES UNPRECEDENTED 400 00:12:45,564 --> 00:12:45,564 >> I'LL SAY. 401 00:12:45,665 --> 00:12:48,134 >> NOW THERE'S A SOLUTION. 402 00:12:48,134 --> 00:12:51,137 INTRODUCING THE MAGICAL MAGA 403 00:12:51,637 --> 00:12:52,605 >> WOW, THE CLIMATE CRISIS IS 404 00:12:53,105 --> 00:12:55,875 >> YES, IT'S JUST THAT SIMPLE. 405 00:12:55,875 --> 00:12:57,777 MAGA SACK IS GOVERNMENT 406 00:12:57,777 --> 00:12:58,878 CERTIFIED TO STOP PROBLEMS RIGHT 407 00:12:58,878 --> 00:13:02,448 AT THE SOURCE, YOUR LYING EYES. 408 00:13:02,448 --> 00:13:04,651 IT'S EASY TO OPERATE AND 409 00:13:04,651 --> 00:13:07,020 GUARANTEED TO BLOCK OUT OPEN 410 00:13:07,020 --> 00:13:08,254 CORRUPTION TO CREEPING FASCISM 411 00:13:08,254 --> 00:13:13,626 TO GROSS INCOMPETENCE, TO SEVERE 412 00:13:13,626 --> 00:13:18,064 MENTAL DECLINE AND JEFFREY 413 00:13:18,064 --> 00:13:18,598 EPSTEIN'S DOODLE. 414 00:13:18,598 --> 00:13:25,405 >> WAS AN ACT OF DOMESTIC 415 00:13:25,905 --> 00:13:29,542 >> RECEIVE MAGA MUFFS ABSOLUTELY 416 00:13:30,042 --> 00:13:30,810 >> HUH? 417 00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:32,111 >> MAGA MUFFS. 418 00:13:32,111 --> 00:13:33,212 >> OKAY. 419 00:13:33,212 --> 00:13:34,981 >> ORDER NOW OR DON'T, NOTHING 420 00:13:35,481 --> 00:13:38,951 GIVE ME SOME DRUGS. 421 00:13:38,951 --> 00:13:39,552 >> Jimmy: WE HAVE A GOOD SHOW 422 00:13:39,552 --> 00:13:40,520 FOR YOU TONIGHT. 423 00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:41,654 TIG NOTARO IS HERE. 424 00:13:41,654 --> 00:13:43,222 WE'VE GOT MUSIC FROM THE MOVIE 425 00:13:43,222 --> 00:13:44,324 "SINNERS," AND WE'LL BE RIGHT 426 00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:46,059 BACK WITH NOAH WYLE. 427 00:13:46,059 --> 00:13:47,927 STICK AROUND. 428 00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:57,370 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 429 00:13:57,370 --> 00:13:59,605 >> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK. 430 00:13:59,605 --> 00:14:01,441 TONIGHT, A VERY FUNNY WOMAN WHO 431 00:14:01,441 --> 00:14:05,945 IS PART OF THE NEW SHOW "STAR 432 00:14:05,945 --> 00:14:08,514 TREK: STAR FLEET ACADEMY," AND 433 00:14:08,514 --> 00:14:12,085 MADE A NEW DOCUMENTARY, "COME 434 00:14:12,085 --> 00:14:14,587 SEE ME IN THE GOOD LIFE," TIG 435 00:14:14,587 --> 00:14:17,990 NOTARO IS HERE TONIGHT. 436 00:14:17,990 --> 00:14:19,158 LATER, THE SCORE WON A GOLDEN 437 00:14:19,158 --> 00:14:22,595 GLOBE, THE "SINNERS" SOUNDTRACK, 438 00:14:22,595 --> 00:14:25,932 MUSIC FROM RAPHAEL SAADIQ, MILES 439 00:14:25,932 --> 00:14:28,935 CATON AND LUDWIG GORANSSON. 440 00:14:28,935 --> 00:14:34,474 TOMORROW, JOHNNY KNOXVILLE AND 441 00:14:34,474 --> 00:14:36,609 CHASE INFINITI WITH MUSIC 442 00:14:36,609 --> 00:14:38,911 FROM -- DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHO 443 00:14:38,911 --> 00:14:39,679 IS IN THE BAND? 444 00:14:39,679 --> 00:14:41,414 >> Guillermo: NO, I DON'T 445 00:14:41,414 --> 00:14:44,117 REMEMBER IT. 446 00:14:44,117 --> 00:14:47,120 >> Jimmy: WELL, DAVE GROHL. 447 00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:51,057 I THINK IT'S HIS BIRTHDAY. 448 00:14:51,057 --> 00:14:54,994 JOHN MAYER, IN THE BAND. 449 00:14:54,994 --> 00:14:58,331 YOU HAVE TO PAY A PRETTY PENNY 450 00:14:58,331 --> 00:15:02,034 FOR THAT LINEUP AT YOUR WEDDING. 451 00:15:02,034 --> 00:15:09,976 OUR FIRST GUEST PLAYS DR. ROBBIE 452 00:15:09,976 --> 00:15:15,481 ON THE MASSIVE SHOW "THE PITT," 453 00:15:15,481 --> 00:15:19,852 PLEASE WELCOME NOAH WYLE. 454 00:15:19,852 --> 00:15:20,353 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 455 00:15:20,353 --> 00:15:23,423 ♪ 456 00:15:23,423 --> 00:15:24,490 HOW ARE YOU? 457 00:15:24,490 --> 00:15:26,192 >> DOING WELL. 458 00:15:26,692 --> 00:15:27,427 >> Jimmy: GOOD TO SEE YOU. 459 00:15:27,427 --> 00:15:30,997 >> NICE TO SEE YOU. 460 00:15:30,997 --> 00:15:31,531 >> Jimmy: CONGRATULATIONS. 461 00:15:32,031 --> 00:15:33,332 >> Jimmy: I HEARD THE FAMILY IS 462 00:15:33,332 --> 00:15:35,435 WITH YOU TONIGHT. 463 00:15:35,435 --> 00:15:37,103 >> WIFE AND ALL MY KIDS. 464 00:15:37,103 --> 00:15:39,105 BIG FANS OF YOU. 465 00:15:39,105 --> 00:15:39,906 >> Jimmy: HOW OLD? 466 00:15:39,906 --> 00:15:44,143 23, 20 AND 10. 467 00:15:44,143 --> 00:15:45,144 >> Jimmy: WOW. 468 00:15:45,144 --> 00:15:47,480 >> I'M STILL IN IT. 469 00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:49,749 JUST LOST THE LAST TOOTH, TOOTH 470 00:15:49,749 --> 00:15:53,553 FAIRY WON'T MAKE ANY MORE 471 00:15:54,053 --> 00:15:54,053 MELANCHOLY. 472 00:15:54,086 --> 00:15:54,954 >> Jimmy: COULD BE A FIGHT. 473 00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:57,657 >> I COULD LOSE A TOOTH, TRUE. 474 00:15:57,657 --> 00:15:59,425 >> Jimmy: SUNDAY NIGHT YOU WON 475 00:15:59,425 --> 00:16:03,362 THE GOLDEN GLOBE FOR BEST ACTOR. 476 00:16:03,362 --> 00:16:05,431 AND BEST DRAMA SERIES AS WELL. 477 00:16:05,431 --> 00:16:07,033 YOU'RE A PRODUCER ON THE SHOW. 478 00:16:07,033 --> 00:16:08,334 DID YOU CELEBRATE AFTER? 479 00:16:08,334 --> 00:16:09,335 >> WE DID. 480 00:16:09,335 --> 00:16:11,270 MY WIFE AND I WENT OUT AND 481 00:16:11,270 --> 00:16:12,905 PRETENDED IT WAS 1997. 482 00:16:12,905 --> 00:16:15,508 SHE DIDN'T, BECAUSE SHE WOULD 483 00:16:15,508 --> 00:16:17,910 HAVE BEEN UNDER AGE, BUT I DID. 484 00:16:17,910 --> 00:16:21,214 AND YOU DON'T RECOVER AS QUICKLY 485 00:16:21,714 --> 00:16:22,915 >> Jimmy: HIT IT HARD? 486 00:16:22,915 --> 00:16:23,416 >> I DID. 487 00:16:23,416 --> 00:16:24,917 ONE OF THOSE NIGHTS I DIDN'T 488 00:16:24,917 --> 00:16:26,085 WANT TO END. 489 00:16:26,085 --> 00:16:27,687 THEY HAPPEN EVERY 30 YEARS IN MY 490 00:16:27,687 --> 00:16:30,056 LIFE AND I DIDN'T WANT IT TO BE 491 00:16:30,556 --> 00:16:32,425 WE STAYED OUT LATE, THEN 492 00:16:32,425 --> 00:16:33,893 UNFORTUNATELY HAD TO BE AT WORK 493 00:16:33,893 --> 00:16:35,161 THE NEXT MORNING. 494 00:16:35,161 --> 00:16:37,129 >> Jimmy: FOR YOU PARTYING LIKE 495 00:16:37,129 --> 00:16:39,999 1997 IS DRINKING A BOTTLE OF 496 00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:41,868 TEQUILA WITH ERIQ LA SALLE? 497 00:16:41,868 --> 00:16:43,870 >> YOU GOT IT HALF RIGHT. 498 00:16:43,870 --> 00:16:45,171 >> Jimmy: DID YOU HAVE TO WORK 499 00:16:45,171 --> 00:16:46,205 THE NEXT MORNING? 500 00:16:46,205 --> 00:16:48,374 >> BRIGHT AND EARLY. 501 00:16:48,874 --> 00:16:51,811 >> WE'RE SHOOTING OUR FINALE 502 00:16:52,311 --> 00:16:54,380 >> Jimmy: HOLD ON, ARE WE ON IT? 503 00:16:54,380 --> 00:16:58,985 >> THIS IS PART OF IT RIGHT 504 00:16:59,485 --> 00:17:00,119 ON JIMMY KIMMEL. 505 00:17:00,119 --> 00:17:02,455 WE FINISH NEXT TUESDAY, 506 00:17:02,955 --> 00:17:04,123 >> Jimmy: SO INTERESTING TO ME. 507 00:17:04,123 --> 00:17:05,992 I HEAR IT ALL THE TIME FROM ME, 508 00:17:05,992 --> 00:17:09,060 WE WON THE EMMY, HAD TO BE AT 509 00:17:09,560 --> 00:17:10,496 WHAT TIME? 510 00:17:10,496 --> 00:17:13,165 >> THEY PUSHED THE CALL TO 7:30 511 00:17:13,165 --> 00:17:16,102 OR 8:00, STILL BRUTAL, DIDN'T 512 00:17:16,102 --> 00:17:17,837 GET HOME UNTIL LATE, BUT PLAYING 513 00:17:17,837 --> 00:17:19,204 THE 15th HOUR OF THE SHIFT. 514 00:17:19,204 --> 00:17:22,208 SO WHEN YOU GO TO WORK AND LOOK 515 00:17:22,208 --> 00:17:24,042 CRAPPY, IT'S BENEFICIAL. 516 00:17:24,042 --> 00:17:25,511 >> Jimmy: MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE 517 00:17:25,511 --> 00:17:28,180 AN AWARDS SHOW EVERY NIGHT 518 00:17:28,180 --> 00:17:30,583 BEFORE. 519 00:17:30,583 --> 00:17:31,183 THIS IS SOMETHING -- 520 00:17:31,183 --> 00:17:32,952 >> OH, YEAH. 521 00:17:32,952 --> 00:17:33,586 >> Jimmy: ASSUMING YOUR 522 00:17:33,586 --> 00:17:35,321 10-YEAR-OLD DID THIS, NOT THE 523 00:17:35,321 --> 00:17:37,356 KIDS IN THE 20s. 524 00:17:37,356 --> 00:17:40,192 >> MY DAUGHTER WAS AFRAID I 525 00:17:40,192 --> 00:17:41,460 WASN'T GOING TO WIN, MADE ME ONE 526 00:17:41,460 --> 00:17:44,163 WHEN I CAME HOME. 527 00:17:44,163 --> 00:17:45,031 WAITING FOR ME. 528 00:17:45,031 --> 00:17:46,966 >> Jimmy: THE ALUMINUM GOLD. 529 00:17:46,966 --> 00:17:48,467 LOOKS LIKE THEY'RE FRIENDS. 530 00:17:48,467 --> 00:17:50,770 >> SHE GOT THE PROPORTIONS 531 00:17:51,270 --> 00:17:54,273 AND IT'S THE ONE I'M MORE PROUD 532 00:17:54,773 --> 00:17:58,811 >> Jimmy: YES. 533 00:17:58,811 --> 00:18:02,582 I'M SURE YOUR COMPETITORS IN THE 534 00:18:02,582 --> 00:18:03,983 CATEGORY WOULD TAKE THAT GOLDEN 535 00:18:03,983 --> 00:18:05,851 GLOBE OFF YOUR HANDS FOR YOU. 536 00:18:05,851 --> 00:18:07,687 YOU MENTIONED THIS IN YOUR 537 00:18:07,687 --> 00:18:10,056 ACCEPTANCE SPEECH, IT WAS YOUR 538 00:18:10,056 --> 00:18:12,391 WIFE SARAH'S BIRTHDAY. 539 00:18:12,391 --> 00:18:14,260 >> YES, JANUARY 11th. 540 00:18:14,260 --> 00:18:15,328 >> Jimmy: THE NIGHT BECOMES ALL 541 00:18:15,328 --> 00:18:16,028 ABOUT YOU. 542 00:18:16,028 --> 00:18:17,763 >> THE NIGHT WAS ABOUT ME, THE 543 00:18:17,763 --> 00:18:18,965 DAY WAS ABOUT ME. 544 00:18:18,965 --> 00:18:20,533 SHE WAS KIND ENOUGH TO GO WITH 545 00:18:20,533 --> 00:18:23,102 ME TO THE GOLDEN GLOBES, NOW 546 00:18:23,102 --> 00:18:25,137 IT'S A BIRTHDAY MONTH FOR HER, 547 00:18:25,137 --> 00:18:26,205 CELEBRATING ALL MONTH LONG. 548 00:18:26,205 --> 00:18:27,673 SHE'S TOLD ME THAT'S HOW SHE 549 00:18:27,673 --> 00:18:29,008 WANTS TO HANDLE IT. 550 00:18:29,008 --> 00:18:30,376 >> Jimmy: BUT YOU'LL BE GETTING 551 00:18:30,376 --> 00:18:32,445 ALL THE AWARDS DURING HIS 552 00:18:32,445 --> 00:18:33,813 BIRTHDAY MONTH. 553 00:18:34,313 --> 00:18:36,616 >> YES, BUT SHE'S -- 554 00:18:36,616 --> 00:18:38,884 >> Jimmy: HOW DO YOU DO A 555 00:18:38,884 --> 00:18:39,785 BIRTHDAY MONTH? 556 00:18:39,785 --> 00:18:40,486 SOMETHING EVERY DAY? 557 00:18:40,486 --> 00:18:42,421 >> I BUY ALL THIS STUFF ON 558 00:18:42,421 --> 00:18:44,457 INSTAGRAM, TAKES FOREVER TO 559 00:18:44,457 --> 00:18:47,026 ARRIVE, TO STAGGERING ARRIVALS 560 00:18:47,026 --> 00:18:48,027 OF GIFTS. 561 00:18:48,027 --> 00:18:49,729 JUST KEEP IT ROLLING THROUGH THE 562 00:18:50,229 --> 00:18:51,297 >> Jimmy: IT'S WEIRD, EVERYTHING 563 00:18:51,297 --> 00:18:54,867 YOU BUY ON INSTAGRAM COMES FROM 564 00:18:55,367 --> 00:18:56,068 >> TRUE. 565 00:18:56,068 --> 00:18:57,570 >> Jimmy: AND RARELY RESEMBLES 566 00:18:57,570 --> 00:18:59,639 WHAT YOU THOUGHT YOU BOUGHT ON 567 00:19:00,139 --> 00:19:00,840 >> ALSO TRUE. 568 00:19:00,840 --> 00:19:02,708 I'M SO UNDERWHELMED BY THIS 569 00:19:02,708 --> 00:19:04,944 JUICER I JUST BOUGHT, THIS HAND 570 00:19:04,944 --> 00:19:06,612 JUICER, REALLY NOT WHAT THEY 571 00:19:07,112 --> 00:19:09,015 >> >> Jimmy: YOU BOUGHT A HAND 572 00:19:09,015 --> 00:19:09,815 JUICER ON INSTAGRAM? 573 00:19:09,815 --> 00:19:11,617 >> I HIT IT THREE TIMES, GOT 574 00:19:11,617 --> 00:19:15,154 THREE BY ACCIDENT. 575 00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:18,290 DO YOU NEED ONE BY ANY CHANCE? 576 00:19:18,290 --> 00:19:20,426 >> Jimmy: I HERE THEY'RE 577 00:19:20,926 --> 00:19:22,928 GO YOU FIND THE ALGORITHM IS 578 00:19:22,928 --> 00:19:24,997 FIGURING YOU OUT? 579 00:19:24,997 --> 00:19:26,599 >> SURVIVAL GEAR, KITCHEN 580 00:19:26,599 --> 00:19:28,467 APPLIANCES AND OLD MOVIE CLIPS. 581 00:19:28,467 --> 00:19:29,502 >> Jimmy: REALLY. 582 00:19:29,502 --> 00:19:32,872 YOU DON'T BUY OLD MOVIES, JUST 583 00:19:32,872 --> 00:19:33,939 SHOW IT TO YOU? 584 00:19:33,939 --> 00:19:34,540 >> YES. 585 00:19:34,540 --> 00:19:35,808 >> Jimmy: MAKES SENSE. 586 00:19:35,808 --> 00:19:39,845 WERE THE KIDS AT THE CRITICS' 587 00:19:40,345 --> 00:19:43,282 >> NO, I TOOK MY WIFE TO THAT 588 00:19:43,282 --> 00:19:44,517 ONE ALONE. 589 00:19:44,517 --> 00:19:46,218 >> Jimmy: BECAUSE YOUR DAUGHTER 590 00:19:46,218 --> 00:19:53,259 IS A K POP DEMON HUNTERS -- 591 00:19:53,259 --> 00:19:54,627 >> THEY ALL ARE. 592 00:19:54,627 --> 00:19:56,729 WE HAD AN AWKWARD MOMENT END OF 593 00:19:56,729 --> 00:19:58,831 THE EVENING, WAITING TO GO TO 594 00:19:58,831 --> 00:20:00,299 OUR CARS, RAINING AND EVERYTHING 595 00:20:00,299 --> 00:20:01,267 WAS WET. 596 00:20:01,267 --> 00:20:03,302 THE PRODUCER OF THE SHOW WAS 597 00:20:03,302 --> 00:20:08,974 GETTING INTO THE SUV WITH THE K 598 00:20:08,974 --> 00:20:12,611 POP DEMON HUNTERS, SLIPPED AND 599 00:20:12,611 --> 00:20:13,846 HIT HER HEAD. 600 00:20:13,846 --> 00:20:15,481 THERE WAS NOBODY ELSE AROUND, I 601 00:20:15,481 --> 00:20:16,048 RAN OVER. 602 00:20:16,048 --> 00:20:16,916 ARE YOU OKAY. 603 00:20:16,916 --> 00:20:17,750 SHE WAS OKAY. 604 00:20:17,750 --> 00:20:21,187 NICK ON HER ELBOW, SOMEBODY 605 00:20:21,187 --> 00:20:23,122 SHOWED UP WITH A BAND-AID, 606 00:20:23,122 --> 00:20:24,190 HANDING THEM TO ME. 607 00:20:24,190 --> 00:20:28,427 THEY'VE ALL GOT THEIR PHONES 608 00:20:28,427 --> 00:20:33,599 FILMING DR. ROBBIE TREATING A 609 00:20:33,599 --> 00:20:38,104 KPOP DEMON HUNTER. 610 00:20:38,104 --> 00:20:40,239 OTHER NIGHT, SHE WENT PAST AND 611 00:20:40,239 --> 00:20:41,841 GAVE ME A LITTLE KISS AND 612 00:20:41,841 --> 00:20:42,441 THANKED ME. 613 00:20:42,441 --> 00:20:44,276 >> Jimmy: DID YOU TELL YOUR 614 00:20:44,276 --> 00:20:48,881 DAUGHTER YOU SAVED THEIR LIVES? 615 00:20:48,881 --> 00:20:51,684 WOULD HAVE SUCCUMBED TO DEMONS 616 00:20:51,684 --> 00:20:55,387 HAD I NOT BEEN THERE? 617 00:20:55,387 --> 00:20:57,256 YOU COLLECT BASEBALL CARDS. 618 00:20:57,256 --> 00:20:58,557 >> I COLLECT EVERYTHING. 619 00:20:58,557 --> 00:21:00,059 >> Jimmy: WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 620 00:21:00,059 --> 00:21:02,962 >> ANYTHING THAT INTERESTS ME, 621 00:21:02,962 --> 00:21:05,131 NEED 10, 11, 12 OF THEM. 622 00:21:05,131 --> 00:21:08,334 >> Jimmy: THREE JUICERS. 623 00:21:08,334 --> 00:21:09,168 >> BUT BASEBALL CARDS SINCE I 624 00:21:09,168 --> 00:21:11,003 WAS A KID. 625 00:21:11,003 --> 00:21:12,004 >> Jimmy: TEAM THE DODGERS? 626 00:21:12,004 --> 00:21:15,341 >> BORN AND RAISED IN L.A. 627 00:21:15,341 --> 00:21:21,480 DAVE JOERGER FAN. 628 00:21:21,480 --> 00:21:22,181 >> Ji 629 00:21:22,181 --> 00:21:23,883 -- DODGERS FAN. 630 00:21:23,883 --> 00:21:25,184 >> Jimmy: I BELIEVE THAT'S THE 631 00:21:25,184 --> 00:21:28,354 WORLD CHAMPIONS. 632 00:21:28,354 --> 00:21:30,823 >> WORLD CHAMPION DODGERS. 633 00:21:30,823 --> 00:21:33,359 ONCE GAVE ME A BASEBALL SIGNED 634 00:21:33,359 --> 00:21:34,493 BY THE WHOLE TEAM. 635 00:21:34,493 --> 00:21:35,127 >> Jimmy: REALLY? 636 00:21:35,127 --> 00:21:38,898 HAS IT BEEN USED, PLAYED WITH? 637 00:21:38,898 --> 00:21:40,599 >> I DON'T KNOW IF GAME USED BUT 638 00:21:40,599 --> 00:21:42,868 IN A LUCITE BOX. 639 00:21:42,868 --> 00:21:44,170 >> Jimmy: REALLY, YOUR WIFE IS 640 00:21:44,170 --> 00:21:45,771 OKAY WITH ALL THE COLLECTIONS? 641 00:21:45,771 --> 00:21:48,073 >> STUFF SHE DOESN'T LIKE SHE 642 00:21:48,073 --> 00:21:49,642 SAYS WOULD LOOK GOOD IN MY 643 00:21:50,142 --> 00:21:52,845 SO IT'S GOT A LOT OF STUFF IN 644 00:21:53,345 --> 00:21:55,080 I'M LIKE A HOARDER WITH A BIG 645 00:21:55,080 --> 00:21:56,882 ENOUGH HOUSE YOU CAN'T TELL HOW 646 00:21:56,882 --> 00:21:58,617 BIG THE PROBLEM IS. 647 00:21:59,117 --> 00:21:59,885 >> Jimmy: WE'LL TAKE A BREAK. 648 00:21:59,885 --> 00:22:01,153 NOAH WYLE IS HERE, "THE PITT" 649 00:22:01,153 --> 00:22:02,087 SEASON TWO IS HAPPENING ON HBO 650 00:22:02,587 --> 00:22:02,587 WE'LL BE BACK AFTER THIS. 651 00:22:13,299 --> 00:22:14,433 >>> BECAUSE TOMORROW I'M LEAVING 652 00:22:14,433 --> 00:22:15,534 FOR SABBATICAL. 653 00:22:15,534 --> 00:22:17,102 >> HE'S LEAVING US FOR THREE 654 00:22:17,102 --> 00:22:18,604 MONTHS ON A MOTORCYCLE. 655 00:22:18,604 --> 00:22:19,538 >> MOTORCYCLE? 656 00:22:19,538 --> 00:22:21,340 YOU'RE JOKING. 657 00:22:21,340 --> 00:22:25,477 WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS? 658 00:22:25,977 --> 00:22:25,977 WHY? 659 00:22:26,378 --> 00:22:28,080 >> MIDDLE AGED MAN, DON'T BE 660 00:22:28,580 --> 00:22:29,481 >> DON'T HOLD BACK. 661 00:22:29,481 --> 00:22:31,483 TELL ME HOW YOU REALLY FIELD. 662 00:22:31,483 --> 00:22:33,853 >> FORGIVE ME FOR BEING BLUNT, 663 00:22:33,853 --> 00:22:36,622 BUT HOW OLD ARE YOU, 50? 664 00:22:36,622 --> 00:22:39,558 >> ISH. 665 00:22:39,558 --> 00:22:43,462 >> 50-ISH-YEAR-OLD MAN ON A 666 00:22:43,462 --> 00:22:44,697 MOTORCYCLE, VERY SAD. 667 00:22:44,697 --> 00:22:46,966 >> Jimmy: THAT IS NOAH WYLE IN 668 00:22:46,966 --> 00:22:49,668 SEASON TWO OF "THE PITT," 669 00:22:49,668 --> 00:22:52,238 THURSDAY ON HBO MAX. 670 00:22:52,238 --> 00:22:54,006 EVERYBODY WAS SUPER EXCITED 671 00:22:54,006 --> 00:22:57,643 ABOUT SEASON TWO STARTING. 672 00:22:57,643 --> 00:23:00,713 SHOW OPENS, ON A MOTORCYCLE, 673 00:23:00,713 --> 00:23:02,948 WIND BLOWING THROUGH YOUR HAIR. 674 00:23:02,948 --> 00:23:08,120 BAND I LOOKED UP, TURNS OUT FROM 675 00:23:08,620 --> 00:23:08,620 >> THE CLARKS. 676 00:23:08,754 --> 00:23:09,755 >> Jimmy: MUSIC BLASTING, 677 00:23:09,755 --> 00:23:11,590 DRIVING TO THE HOSPITAL, BUT 678 00:23:11,590 --> 00:23:13,492 HELMET NOT ON YOUR HEAD. 679 00:23:13,492 --> 00:23:14,894 IS THAT SOMETHING YOU DECIDED TO 680 00:23:15,394 --> 00:23:17,396 WAS THAT PART OF THE 681 00:23:17,396 --> 00:23:18,097 INTENTIONAL -- 682 00:23:18,097 --> 00:23:20,699 >> IS NOT INITIALLY PART OF THE 683 00:23:20,699 --> 00:23:22,368 DESIGN, BUT GOT TO PITTSBURGH TO 684 00:23:22,368 --> 00:23:23,836 SHOOT THE SCENE AND NIGHT BEFORE 685 00:23:23,836 --> 00:23:28,274 I HAD DINNER WITH JOHN WELLS, 686 00:23:28,274 --> 00:23:30,509 DIRECTING THE EPISODE, EXECUTIVE 687 00:23:31,009 --> 00:23:34,647 I SAID I DON'T KNOW IF HE WEARS 688 00:23:34,647 --> 00:23:36,615 A HELMET BUT TELLS PEOPLE HE 689 00:23:36,615 --> 00:23:37,149 DOES. 690 00:23:37,149 --> 00:23:42,087 LIKE WHEN GENE WILDER TOOK 691 00:23:42,087 --> 00:23:44,323 PEOPLE INTO THE CHOCOLATE 692 00:23:44,323 --> 00:23:46,458 FACTOR, HE AGREED IF HE COULD 693 00:23:46,458 --> 00:23:48,928 WALK WITH A LIMP, FALL FORWARD 694 00:23:48,928 --> 00:23:50,562 AND COME UP WITH A BOW. 695 00:23:50,562 --> 00:23:53,232 ASKED HIM WHY, FROM THAT POINT 696 00:23:53,232 --> 00:23:55,167 FORWARD THEY WON'T KNOW IF I'M 697 00:23:55,167 --> 00:23:57,002 TELLING THE TRUTH OR NOT. 698 00:23:57,002 --> 00:23:58,704 A GUY ON A MENTAL HEALTH 699 00:23:58,704 --> 00:24:00,172 JOURNEY, RESISTANT TO GETTING 700 00:24:00,172 --> 00:24:02,508 THE HELP HE PROBABLY SHOULD GET, 701 00:24:02,508 --> 00:24:05,811 WHAT BETTER CLUE TO GIVE THE 702 00:24:05,811 --> 00:24:06,712 AUDIENCE HE'S PLAYING FAST AND 703 00:24:06,712 --> 00:24:09,682 LOOSE WITH HIS LIFE THEN LET 704 00:24:09,682 --> 00:24:11,317 THEM IN ON THE DETAIL HE'S NOT 705 00:24:11,317 --> 00:24:13,319 TELLING THE PEOPLE HE WORKS WITH 706 00:24:13,319 --> 00:24:14,420 AND LOVE HIM. 707 00:24:14,420 --> 00:24:17,690 >> Jimmy: AN ER DOCTOR IS NOT 708 00:24:17,690 --> 00:24:19,425 WEARING A HELMET. 709 00:24:19,425 --> 00:24:21,260 DO YOU RIDE A MOTORCYCLE? 710 00:24:21,260 --> 00:24:25,564 >> NO, I LEARNED TO RIDE FOR 711 00:24:25,564 --> 00:24:28,734 "FALLING SKIES," WE HAD TO RIDE 712 00:24:28,734 --> 00:24:31,437 DIRT BIKES AND I WASN'T 713 00:24:31,437 --> 00:24:32,538 COMFORTABLE ON THEM. 714 00:24:32,538 --> 00:24:35,274 I TOOK A CLASS TO GET CERTIFIED. 715 00:24:35,274 --> 00:24:36,075 >> Jimmy: HOW LONG WERE YOU ON 716 00:24:36,075 --> 00:24:37,376 THE BIKE? 717 00:24:37,376 --> 00:24:38,210 >> NOT LONG. 718 00:24:38,210 --> 00:24:41,347 >> Jimmy: IT TAKES PLACE ON THE 719 00:24:41,347 --> 00:24:42,548 FOURTH OF JULY, GOT TO BE 720 00:24:42,548 --> 00:24:45,417 BIGGEST DAY OF THE YEAR FOR 721 00:24:45,417 --> 00:24:46,919 EMERGENCY ROOMS. 722 00:24:46,919 --> 00:24:51,056 >> FOURTH OF JULY, HALLOWEEN, 723 00:24:51,056 --> 00:24:53,425 FULL MOON NIGHT, THAT'S SPECIAL. 724 00:24:53,425 --> 00:24:56,095 WE'RE MIXING PATRIOTISM, ALCOHOL 725 00:24:56,095 --> 00:24:58,097 AND FIREWORKS. 726 00:24:58,097 --> 00:25:00,432 >> Jimmy: YOUR COSTAR TAYLOR WAS 727 00:25:00,432 --> 00:25:03,602 HERE AND I ASKED HER WHAT 728 00:25:03,602 --> 00:25:04,570 DOCTORS ASK HER ABOUT WHEN THEY 729 00:25:04,570 --> 00:25:06,105 APPROACH HER. 730 00:25:06,105 --> 00:25:08,474 SHE SAID YOU NEED MORE BUTT 731 00:25:08,474 --> 00:25:09,341 STUFF IN THE SHOW. 732 00:25:09,341 --> 00:25:12,011 >> YEAH, I DON'T DISAGREE. 733 00:25:12,011 --> 00:25:13,746 TALK TO MOST DOCTORS THEY'LL 734 00:25:13,746 --> 00:25:15,714 TELL YOU THAT'S A BIG PART OF 735 00:25:15,714 --> 00:25:16,315 THE PRACTICE. 736 00:25:16,315 --> 00:25:17,783 >> Jimmy: A BIG PART OF THE 737 00:25:17,783 --> 00:25:18,751 PRACTICE, REALLY IS. 738 00:25:18,751 --> 00:25:21,353 >> WE HAVE A GREAT TECHNICAL 739 00:25:21,353 --> 00:25:23,856 ADVISER, DR. JOE SACS, HE 740 00:25:23,856 --> 00:25:26,592 DOESN'T LOOK TAKE THAT, THINKS 741 00:25:26,592 --> 00:25:28,093 IT'S THE LOW-HANGING FRUIT OF 742 00:25:28,093 --> 00:25:31,030 THE MEDICAL SHOW, HE'S TRYING TO 743 00:25:31,530 --> 00:25:33,265 >> Jimmy: HE THINKS OF IT AS 744 00:25:33,265 --> 00:25:37,036 FRUIT, INTERESTING. 745 00:25:37,036 --> 00:25:39,138 >> THAT'S A WEIRD ANALOGY. 746 00:25:39,138 --> 00:25:40,806 I SEE THAT NOW. 747 00:25:40,806 --> 00:25:41,707 >> Jimmy: ONE OF THE GREAT 748 00:25:41,707 --> 00:25:44,710 THINGS ABOUT THE SUCCESS OF THE 749 00:25:44,710 --> 00:25:45,644 SHOW IS THAT YOU HAVE BEEN ABLE 750 00:25:45,644 --> 00:25:47,246 TO USE YOUR PLATFORM TO TALK 751 00:25:47,246 --> 00:25:49,081 ABOUT MEDICAL ISSUES, THINGS 752 00:25:49,081 --> 00:25:50,416 THAT ARE IMPORTANT. 753 00:25:50,416 --> 00:25:53,485 IN FACT WE HAVE A PUBLIC SERVICE 754 00:25:53,985 --> 00:25:55,454 >> GOOD, YOU HAVE A COPY OF 755 00:25:55,954 --> 00:25:58,090 >> Jimmy: DO YOU MIND? 756 00:25:58,090 --> 00:25:58,857 PREMIERING IT HERE. 757 00:25:58,857 --> 00:25:59,391 HERE IT IS. 758 00:25:59,391 --> 00:26:02,261 >> THE MEASLES VACCINE WILL TURN 759 00:26:02,261 --> 00:26:07,199 YOUR SON INTO A FURRY, A PAN 760 00:26:07,199 --> 00:26:09,134 SEXUAL FURRY. 761 00:26:09,134 --> 00:26:12,104 I'M NOAH WYLE, I PLAY A DOCTOR 762 00:26:12,104 --> 00:26:16,775 ON "THE PITT" AND ON "ER," BUT 763 00:26:16,775 --> 00:26:17,843 I'M NOT A REAL DOCTOR. 764 00:26:17,843 --> 00:26:20,145 JUST LIKE MOST OF YOU ARE NOT 765 00:26:20,645 --> 00:26:22,815 I WAS CAST BECAUSE I HAVE A 766 00:26:22,815 --> 00:26:26,485 TRUSTWORTHY FACE AND CAN 767 00:26:26,485 --> 00:26:27,586 CONVINCINGLY DELIVER MEDICAL 768 00:26:27,586 --> 00:26:30,355 LINES LIKE -- I'M SORRY, I'M 769 00:26:30,355 --> 00:26:34,426 AFRAID YOU HAVE ADVANCED -- I 770 00:26:34,426 --> 00:26:36,495 HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I JUST SAID. 771 00:26:36,495 --> 00:26:38,030 BUT THAT DOESN'T MATTER, BECAUSE 772 00:26:38,030 --> 00:26:40,432 WHEN IT COMES TO MEDICINE, I DO 773 00:26:40,432 --> 00:26:42,101 MY OWN RESEARCH AND GO WITH MY 774 00:26:42,601 --> 00:26:44,069 FOR INSTANCE, I KNOW THAT RAW 775 00:26:44,069 --> 00:26:46,605 MILK IS GOOD FOR YOU, BUT RAW 776 00:26:46,605 --> 00:26:47,773 CHICKEN, EVEN BETTER. 777 00:26:47,773 --> 00:26:53,712 ESPECIALLY WHEN IT COMES IN A 778 00:26:53,712 --> 00:26:54,446 SMOOTHY. 779 00:26:54,446 --> 00:26:57,983 I KNOW THAT 5G TOWERS GIVE YOU 780 00:26:57,983 --> 00:26:59,751 COVID-19 AND VITAMIN C ISN'T 781 00:26:59,751 --> 00:27:02,521 REAL, IT WAS CREATED BY 782 00:27:02,521 --> 00:27:04,156 TROPICANA TO SELL JUICE. 783 00:27:04,156 --> 00:27:06,291 THE FLU VACCINE WILL TAKE FOUR 784 00:27:06,291 --> 00:27:09,128 INCHES OFF YOUR PENIS OR VAGINA. 785 00:27:09,128 --> 00:27:12,531 IF YOU TAKE PROBIOTICS AND 786 00:27:12,531 --> 00:27:13,332 ANTIBIOTICS AT THE SAME TIME, 787 00:27:13,332 --> 00:27:17,836 YOU WILL ACHIEVE THE PERFECT 788 00:27:17,836 --> 00:27:21,607 LEVEL OF BIOTICS. 789 00:27:21,607 --> 00:27:23,509 FLINTSTONES VITAMINS WILL MAKE 790 00:27:23,509 --> 00:27:25,511 YOU HARD AS A ROCK. 791 00:27:25,511 --> 00:27:27,446 AND DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN'T GET 792 00:27:27,446 --> 00:27:29,548 PREGNANT IN A HOT TUB? 793 00:27:29,548 --> 00:27:30,949 YES, HELLO, THIS IS HE. 794 00:27:30,949 --> 00:27:33,385 YES, I WOULD BE HONORED TO HEAD 795 00:27:33,385 --> 00:27:35,220 UP THE CENTERS FOR DISEASE 796 00:27:35,220 --> 00:27:38,290 CONTROL, NO, THANK YOU 797 00:27:38,290 --> 00:27:39,291 MR. PRESIDENT. 798 00:27:39,291 --> 00:27:41,927 WELL, LOOKS LIKE I'M A MEDICAL 799 00:27:41,927 --> 00:27:43,395 EXPERT AFTER ALL. 800 00:27:43,395 --> 00:27:45,197 I'M NOAH WYLE, DON'T DO ANYTHING 801 00:27:45,197 --> 00:27:48,534 UNTIL I SAY IT'S OKAY. 802 00:27:48,534 --> 00:27:49,968 >> Announcer: THIS HAS BEEN A 803 00:27:49,968 --> 00:27:53,138 MESSAGE FROM THE CDC. 804 00:27:53,138 --> 00:27:54,072 >> ASTROLOGY IS THE ONLY TRUE 805 00:27:54,072 --> 00:28:00,112 SCIENCE! 806 00:28:00,112 --> 00:28:01,747 >> Jimmy: IMPORTANT WORDS, THANK 807 00:28:01,747 --> 00:28:02,681 YOU FOR SHARING THAT. 808 00:28:02,681 --> 00:28:05,050 >> NEED TO GET THE WORD OUT. 809 00:28:05,050 --> 00:28:05,817 >> Jimmy: THURSDAY NIGHT, HBO 810 00:28:05,817 --> 00:28:07,653 MAX, NOAH WYLE, EVERYBODY. 811 00:28:11,623 --> 00:28:13,859 >> Announcer: THIS WEEK ON J 812 00:28:13,859 --> 00:28:16,128 "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE," JOHNNY 813 00:28:16,128 --> 00:28:20,032 KNOXVILLE, JESSE BUCKLEY, CHASE 814 00:28:20,032 --> 00:28:22,234 INFINITI, AND CHRIS PRATT. 815 00:28:22,234 --> 00:28:23,669 PLUS MUSIC FROM ED SHEERAN. 816 00:28:30,642 --> 00:28:33,712 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 817 00:28:33,712 --> 00:28:38,417 >> Jimmy: HI THERE, WELCOME 818 00:28:38,917 --> 00:28:45,324 THE "SINNERS" SOUNDTRACK SONGS 819 00:28:45,324 --> 00:28:50,062 IS COMING UP. 820 00:28:50,062 --> 00:28:53,131 NOW PLEASE WELCOME, TIG NOTARO. 821 00:28:53,131 --> 00:28:53,632 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 822 00:28:53,632 --> 00:29:00,973 ♪ 823 00:29:00,973 --> 00:29:02,107 HOW ARE YOU? 824 00:29:02,107 --> 00:29:02,941 >> DOING WELL. 825 00:29:02,941 --> 00:29:03,976 HOW ARE YOU? 826 00:29:03,976 --> 00:29:07,145 >> Jimmy: GOOD TO SEE YOU. 827 00:29:07,145 --> 00:29:09,781 YOU'RE A BUSY. 828 00:29:09,781 --> 00:29:10,582 ARE YOU TOURING? 829 00:29:10,582 --> 00:29:13,018 >> TOMORROW NIGHT, FORT 830 00:29:13,018 --> 00:29:15,187 LAUDERDALE, BEGINNING OF THE 831 00:29:15,687 --> 00:29:18,624 >> Jimmy: PODCASTING REGULARLY. 832 00:29:18,624 --> 00:29:22,861 >> HANDSOME, MY PODCAST NAME. 833 00:29:22,861 --> 00:29:25,831 >> Jimmy: AND STAR TREKKING, A 834 00:29:26,331 --> 00:29:27,132 >> VERY BIG DEAL. 835 00:29:27,132 --> 00:29:31,470 >> Jimmy: ARE YOU A TREKKIE? 836 00:29:31,470 --> 00:29:38,076 I AM ON "STAR TREK," MY BROTHER 837 00:29:38,076 --> 00:29:41,246 AND I WATCHED THE ORIGINAL, AND 838 00:29:41,246 --> 00:29:45,183 I WAS ON "DISCOVERY" AND MY 839 00:29:45,183 --> 00:29:48,787 CHARACTER POPPED UP TO "STAR 840 00:29:48,787 --> 00:29:51,023 FLEET ACADEMY." 841 00:29:51,023 --> 00:29:55,927 >> Jimmy: YOU'RE ON -- 842 00:29:55,927 --> 00:29:59,031 WITH PAUL GIAMATTI. 843 00:29:59,031 --> 00:30:01,633 >> Jimmy: NOT BAD. 844 00:30:01,633 --> 00:30:03,135 YOU WITHON THE FLOAT. 845 00:30:03,135 --> 00:30:06,104 >> IN THE POURING RAIN. 846 00:30:06,104 --> 00:30:12,244 >> Jimmy: WITH YOUR COSTARS AND 847 00:30:12,244 --> 00:30:15,314 GEORGE TAKEI, HIS HAND IS 848 00:30:15,314 --> 00:30:17,549 PERMANENTLY LIKE THAT NOW. 849 00:30:17,549 --> 00:30:21,019 THEY WENT ALL OUT ON THIS 850 00:30:21,519 --> 00:30:22,554 DID YOU KEEP THIS? 851 00:30:22,554 --> 00:30:25,357 >> THE WHOLE FLOAT IS IN MY 852 00:30:25,357 --> 00:30:26,158 DRIVEWAY AND THEY'RE ALL STILL 853 00:30:26,158 --> 00:30:28,393 ON IT. 854 00:30:28,393 --> 00:30:28,960 SIX MONTHS. 855 00:30:28,960 --> 00:30:30,796 >> Jimmy: WAS IT RAINING HARD? 856 00:30:30,796 --> 00:30:32,297 >> IT WAS VERY COLD AND RAINING 857 00:30:32,297 --> 00:30:33,365 ON AND OFF. 858 00:30:33,365 --> 00:30:37,836 A LITTLE -- ANY RAIN IS A LITTLE 859 00:30:37,836 --> 00:30:39,671 TOO HARD FOR MY TASTES. 860 00:30:39,671 --> 00:30:41,840 >> Jimmy: ESPECIALLY DURING A 861 00:30:42,340 --> 00:30:43,375 LITERALLY RAINED ON YOUR PARADE. 862 00:30:43,375 --> 00:30:45,410 >> YES, AND IT WAS OVER TWO 863 00:30:45,410 --> 00:30:52,851 HOURS, ALL WAVING AND DOING THE 864 00:30:52,851 --> 00:30:54,720 "STAR TREK," I CAN'T REMEMBER 865 00:30:54,720 --> 00:30:57,489 WHAT IT'S CALLED. 866 00:30:57,489 --> 00:30:58,223 >> Jimmy: LIVE LONG AND PROSPER. 867 00:30:58,223 --> 00:31:00,859 >> AND AT THE VERY END, SAYING 868 00:31:00,859 --> 00:31:03,228 GOODBYES, GEORGE FROM THE 869 00:31:03,228 --> 00:31:05,263 ORIGINAL "STAR TREK" SERIES SAID 870 00:31:05,263 --> 00:31:08,867 AND WHAT ORGANIZATION ARE YOU 871 00:31:08,867 --> 00:31:10,836 INVOLVED WITH. 872 00:31:10,836 --> 00:31:13,839 AND I HAVE NEVER MET HIM, JUST 873 00:31:13,839 --> 00:31:15,540 BEEN IN A PARADE WITH HIM 874 00:31:15,540 --> 00:31:17,509 WAVING, I THOUGHT HE WAS 875 00:31:18,009 --> 00:31:19,845 AND I SAID ORGANIZATION, WHAT DO 876 00:31:19,845 --> 00:31:20,445 YOU MEAN? 877 00:31:20,445 --> 00:31:24,416 HE SAID WHAT ORGANIZATION ARE 878 00:31:24,416 --> 00:31:25,217 YOU. 879 00:31:25,217 --> 00:31:28,520 I SAID "STAR TREK" AND HE SAID 880 00:31:28,520 --> 00:31:32,891 YOU'RE WITH "STAR TREK," IN WHAT 881 00:31:33,391 --> 00:31:35,560 I SAID I'M AN ACTOR. 882 00:31:35,560 --> 00:31:38,830 HE SAID YOU'RE ALL ACTORS ON 883 00:31:38,830 --> 00:31:45,337 "STAR TREK," AND I WAS LIKE YES, 884 00:31:45,337 --> 00:31:48,039 I CAN ONLY ASSUME HE JUST 885 00:31:48,039 --> 00:31:49,875 THOUGHT WE WERE ESCORTING HIM. 886 00:31:49,875 --> 00:31:51,943 IT WAS SUCH A FUNNY MOMENT 887 00:31:51,943 --> 00:31:54,379 BECAUSE YOU KNOW, REBECCA AND I 888 00:31:54,379 --> 00:31:59,117 HAVE BEEN AROUND FOR A BEAT, AND 889 00:31:59,117 --> 00:32:01,086 JUST WORD HADN'T REACHED HIM 890 00:32:01,586 --> 00:32:05,123 >> Jimmy: HE KNOWS NOW FOR SURE. 891 00:32:05,123 --> 00:32:06,258 >> MAYBE. 892 00:32:06,258 --> 00:32:07,692 >> Jimmy: YOU, I WANT TO TALK 893 00:32:07,692 --> 00:32:09,428 ABOUT YOUR DOCUMENTARY, ONE OF 894 00:32:09,428 --> 00:32:12,264 THE PRODUCERS OF A DOCUMENTARY 895 00:32:12,264 --> 00:32:13,465 ABOUT YOUR FRIEND GETTING -- YOU 896 00:32:13,465 --> 00:32:17,702 WON AWARD AT SUNDANCE, GOT OSCAR 897 00:32:17,702 --> 00:32:19,404 BUZZ, WHOLE THING, SHORT LIST, 898 00:32:19,404 --> 00:32:20,572 ALL THAT STUFF. 899 00:32:20,572 --> 00:32:21,973 MUST BE EXCITING. 900 00:32:21,973 --> 00:32:24,009 THE SUBJECT OF THE DOCUMENTARY 901 00:32:24,009 --> 00:32:27,078 IS A -- WAS A CLOSE FRIEND OF 902 00:32:27,578 --> 00:32:29,114 >> ANDREA GIBSON. 903 00:32:29,114 --> 00:32:32,250 I KNEW FOR 25 YEARS, AND ANDREA 904 00:32:32,250 --> 00:32:35,086 WAS THE POET LAUREATE OF THE 905 00:32:35,086 --> 00:32:38,056 STATE OF COLORADO. 906 00:32:38,056 --> 00:32:42,227 AND ANDREA HAD STAGE FOUR 907 00:32:42,227 --> 00:32:43,929 OVARIAN CANCER. 908 00:32:43,929 --> 00:32:45,664 MY FRIEND STEPH WILLIN, HERE 909 00:32:45,664 --> 00:32:47,332 WITH ME TODAY, WE WERE ON THE 910 00:32:47,332 --> 00:32:48,733 PHONE A COUPLE OF YEARS AGO 911 00:32:48,733 --> 00:32:51,837 TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO HELP 912 00:32:51,837 --> 00:32:52,871 ANDREA WHILE THEY WERE GOING 913 00:32:52,871 --> 00:32:54,773 THROUGH ALL THE HEALTH STRUGGLES 914 00:32:54,773 --> 00:32:57,209 AND WORKING ON ANDREA'S PODCAST, 915 00:32:57,209 --> 00:32:59,578 TRYING TO FIGURE OUT EDITING AND 916 00:32:59,578 --> 00:33:00,712 HOW TO PRODUCE THIS. 917 00:33:00,712 --> 00:33:03,615 STEPH JUST SAID, I FEEL LIKE 918 00:33:03,615 --> 00:33:04,983 ANDREA'S LIFE RIGHT NOW WOULD 919 00:33:04,983 --> 00:33:06,785 MAKE A REALLY GREAT DOCUMENTARY. 920 00:33:06,785 --> 00:33:10,288 I WAS LIKE OH, MY GOD -- AND I 921 00:33:10,288 --> 00:33:12,591 IMMEDIATELY GOT ON THE PHONE AND 922 00:33:12,591 --> 00:33:15,694 REACHED OUT TO THE DIRECTOR AND 923 00:33:15,694 --> 00:33:16,761 PRODUCER WHO TOOK ON THE 924 00:33:17,261 --> 00:33:20,565 AND AT FIRST THEY WERE LIKE, A 925 00:33:20,565 --> 00:33:23,902 POET WITH OVARIAN CANCER, HMM, 926 00:33:23,902 --> 00:33:25,504 OKAY, WE'LL GET BACK TO YOU. 927 00:33:25,504 --> 00:33:28,039 YOU KNOW BECAUSE WE HAD TALKED 928 00:33:28,039 --> 00:33:29,341 PREVIOUSLY ABOUT MAYBE WORKING 929 00:33:29,341 --> 00:33:30,075 TOGETHER. 930 00:33:30,075 --> 00:33:33,178 THEY SAID THEY WANTED TO DO A 931 00:33:33,178 --> 00:33:34,145 FUNNY DOCUMENTARY AND THAT'S 932 00:33:34,145 --> 00:33:35,313 WHAT I BROUGHT THEM. 933 00:33:35,313 --> 00:33:37,749 BUT THEY LOOKED INTO ANDREA'S 934 00:33:37,749 --> 00:33:39,518 POETRY AND THREE DAYS LATER THEY 935 00:33:39,518 --> 00:33:41,720 WERE LIKE OH, MY GOD WE'RE 936 00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:43,488 BUYING PLANE TICKETS AND GOING 937 00:33:43,488 --> 00:33:44,589 OUT THERE NEXT WEEK. 938 00:33:44,589 --> 00:33:45,924 WE MADE THIS FILM. 939 00:33:45,924 --> 00:33:47,459 >> Jimmy: YOU HAVE A CLIP OF THE 940 00:33:47,459 --> 00:33:48,193 MOVIE. 941 00:33:48,193 --> 00:33:49,961 >> I DO HAVE A CLIP OF THE 942 00:33:50,461 --> 00:33:51,730 >> Jimmy: DO YOU NEED TO EXPLAIN 943 00:33:51,730 --> 00:33:53,431 WHAT WE'RE GOING TO SAY? 944 00:33:53,431 --> 00:33:54,866 >> YEAH. 945 00:33:54,866 --> 00:33:57,502 ANDREA IS -- I MEAN IT'S VERY 946 00:33:57,502 --> 00:33:59,571 BRIEF MOMENT OF A POEM THAT 947 00:33:59,571 --> 00:34:03,909 ANDREA WROTE CALLED "THE LITTLE 948 00:34:03,909 --> 00:34:05,076 THINGS." 949 00:34:05,076 --> 00:34:06,044 OFTENTIMES WHEN PEOPLE ARE AT 950 00:34:06,044 --> 00:34:08,480 THE END OF LIFE, THEY WANT TO 951 00:34:08,480 --> 00:34:10,581 JUMP FROM AN AIRPLANE, DO ALL 952 00:34:10,581 --> 00:34:12,984 THESE WILD THINGS, BUT ANDREA 953 00:34:12,984 --> 00:34:15,654 JUST WANTED TO DO THE LITTLE 954 00:34:15,654 --> 00:34:17,121 THINGS IN LIFE. 955 00:34:17,121 --> 00:34:18,255 IT'S REALLY BEAUTIFUL. 956 00:34:18,255 --> 00:34:19,491 THAT'S THE CLIP. 957 00:34:19,491 --> 00:34:25,864 >> THESE ARE MY BIGGEST, TINIEST 958 00:34:25,864 --> 00:34:27,065 DREAMS. 959 00:34:27,065 --> 00:34:29,467 TO SIT WITH THE MORNING DOVE WHO 960 00:34:29,467 --> 00:34:31,670 CRIES FOR HER LOST LOVE. 961 00:34:31,670 --> 00:34:34,139 TO MEND A FRIEND'S CLOTHES WITH 962 00:34:34,139 --> 00:34:37,708 MY GRANDMOTHER'S THIMBLES. 963 00:34:37,708 --> 00:34:39,110 HOW ABOUT MY POWER DRILL? 964 00:34:39,110 --> 00:34:42,280 >> WE MIGHT NEED YOUR POWER 965 00:34:42,780 --> 00:34:44,716 >> THERE ARE FOUR SQUIRRELS HERE 966 00:34:44,716 --> 00:34:46,284 WHO FIGHT WHEN I BRING OUT NUTS. 967 00:34:46,284 --> 00:34:50,422 SO I GOT THESE HOUSES. 968 00:34:50,422 --> 00:34:52,489 TO WATCH A SQUIRREL REBUILD HER 969 00:34:52,489 --> 00:34:54,926 NEST IN THE ONLY PINE THAT 970 00:34:54,926 --> 00:34:57,094 SURVIVED THE STORM. 971 00:34:57,094 --> 00:34:58,063 YES! 972 00:34:58,063 --> 00:34:59,397 >> Jimmy: THAT'S NICE. 973 00:34:59,397 --> 00:35:01,266 DID ANDREA GET TO SEE THE 974 00:35:01,266 --> 00:35:02,667 FINISHED DOCUMENTARY? 975 00:35:02,667 --> 00:35:05,737 >> YEAH, ANDREA VERY 976 00:35:05,737 --> 00:35:08,440 UNFORTUNATELY AND SADLY PASSED 977 00:35:08,440 --> 00:35:12,577 AWAY THIS SUMMER, BUT ANDREA WAS 978 00:35:12,577 --> 00:35:16,414 ABLE TO COME OUT TO SUNDANCE AND 979 00:35:16,414 --> 00:35:17,616 SEE THE FILM. 980 00:35:17,616 --> 00:35:18,883 >> Jimmy: THAT'S NICE. 981 00:35:18,883 --> 00:35:20,518 NOW YOU ARE -- I THINK YOU WERE 982 00:35:20,518 --> 00:35:24,856 AT THE GOVERNORS AWARD FOR THE 983 00:35:25,356 --> 00:35:27,759 >> YOU KNOW, WHERE YOU TYPICALLY 984 00:35:27,759 --> 00:35:30,528 FIND ME, PLACES LIKE THAT. 985 00:35:30,528 --> 00:35:32,163 >> Jimmy: AND I KNOW THIS IS A 986 00:35:32,163 --> 00:35:35,467 WEIRD TRANSITION, I'M AWARE OF 987 00:35:35,967 --> 00:35:39,771 PLEASE SAVE YOUR COMMENTS. 988 00:35:39,771 --> 00:35:41,439 BUT YOU -- TOM CRUISE WAS 989 00:35:41,439 --> 00:35:45,043 GETTING AN AWARD AT THIS -- AN 990 00:35:45,043 --> 00:35:47,245 HONORARY OSCAR, CORRECT? 991 00:35:47,745 --> 00:35:49,347 >> Jimmy: AND YOU APPROACHED 992 00:35:49,847 --> 00:35:51,249 >> I'VE BEEN TOLD FOR YEARS THAT 993 00:35:51,249 --> 00:35:54,552 PEOPLE FEEL LIKE I LOOK LIKE TOM 994 00:35:54,552 --> 00:35:55,186 CRUISE. 995 00:35:55,186 --> 00:35:58,790 AND IT'S NOT EVERY DAY THAT I -- 996 00:35:58,790 --> 00:36:00,892 I'VE NEVER BEEN IN A ROOM WITH 997 00:36:00,892 --> 00:36:01,393 TOM CRUISE. 998 00:36:01,393 --> 00:36:03,795 AND HE GOT OFF THE STAGE AND HE 999 00:36:03,795 --> 00:36:07,732 WAS MINGLING WITH EVERYBODY 1000 00:36:08,232 --> 00:36:10,001 AND I WAS LIKE -- I WAS THERE 1001 00:36:10,001 --> 00:36:12,137 WITH THE PRODUCER OF "COME SEE 1002 00:36:12,137 --> 00:36:15,373 ME IN THE GOOD LIGHT," AND I WAS 1003 00:36:15,373 --> 00:36:17,142 LIKE I'M BEELINING FOR TOM 1004 00:36:17,142 --> 00:36:19,344 CRUISE, I'M GOING TO MEET HIM. 1005 00:36:19,344 --> 00:36:21,780 MY WIFE ALWAYS THOUGHT HE WAS 1006 00:36:21,780 --> 00:36:22,347 REALLY CUTE. 1007 00:36:22,347 --> 00:36:24,449 I ALWAYS TOLD HER SHE MARRIED 1008 00:36:24,449 --> 00:36:29,921 THE DIY LESBIAN VERSION. 1009 00:36:30,421 --> 00:36:32,857 SO ANYWAY, I BEELINED THROUGH 1010 00:36:32,857 --> 00:36:34,392 ALL THE SECURITY AND REPS. 1011 00:36:34,392 --> 00:36:35,860 I KNOW HIS AGENT A LITTLE BIT, 1012 00:36:35,860 --> 00:36:38,163 SO I WAS JUST LIKE TAKE EVERY 1013 00:36:38,163 --> 00:36:44,035 PICTURE OF ME, ANYTHING WHERE 1014 00:36:44,035 --> 00:36:44,936 EVEN IF IT'S THE BOACK OF MY HED 1015 00:36:44,936 --> 00:36:47,005 NEAR TOM CRUISE, TAKE EVERY 1016 00:36:47,005 --> 00:36:48,673 PICTURE, I TOLD JESS, THE 1017 00:36:49,173 --> 00:36:52,377 I GET UP TO TOM'S AGENT, HI, 1018 00:36:52,377 --> 00:36:54,279 COULD I MEET TOM, JUST WANTED TO 1019 00:36:54,279 --> 00:36:55,780 SHOW HIM A PICTURE, EVERYBODY 1020 00:36:55,780 --> 00:36:57,248 TELLS ME I LOOK LIKE HIM. 1021 00:36:57,248 --> 00:37:03,488 SHE WAS SO FORMAL, SHE SAID, 1022 00:37:03,488 --> 00:37:06,825 TOM, COMEDIAN TIG NOTARO, AND 1023 00:37:06,825 --> 00:37:08,927 THE CROWD PARTS AND I SHOWED HIM 1024 00:37:08,927 --> 00:37:12,063 THIS PICTURE, AND I JUST SAID, 1025 00:37:12,063 --> 00:37:16,401 LISTEN, IF YOU EVER NEED ANYBODY 1026 00:37:16,401 --> 00:37:17,736 TO PLAY YOUR GAY SISTER -- I 1027 00:37:17,736 --> 00:37:20,138 MEAN I LOOK MORE LIKE TOM CRUISE 1028 00:37:20,138 --> 00:37:22,107 THAN TOM CRUISE LOOKS LIKE TOM 1029 00:37:22,107 --> 00:37:23,675 CRUISE IN THIS PICTURE. 1030 00:37:23,675 --> 00:37:24,642 >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, LET'S HAVE 1031 00:37:24,642 --> 00:37:28,913 A LOOK. 1032 00:37:28,913 --> 00:37:34,052 YEAH. 1033 00:37:34,052 --> 00:37:38,056 THAT'S TOM. 1034 00:37:38,056 --> 00:37:43,862 NOW WE HAVE TIG NOTARO. 1035 00:37:43,862 --> 00:37:44,462 I LIKE IT. 1036 00:37:44,462 --> 00:37:47,098 "COME SEE ME IN A GOOD LIGHT" ON 1037 00:37:47,098 --> 00:37:49,000 APPLE TV, AND "STAR TREK: STAR 1038 00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:50,301 FLEET ACADEMY" PREMIERES ON 1039 00:37:50,301 --> 00:37:51,236 PARAMOUNT PLUS. 1040 00:37:51,236 --> 00:37:52,437 TIG NOTARO. 1041 00:37:57,342 --> 00:38:02,280 >> Jimmy: THANKS TO NOAH WYLE, 1042 00:38:02,280 --> 00:38:05,850 TIG NOTARO, APOLOGIES TO MATT 1043 00:38:06,350 --> 00:38:09,120 "NIGHTLINE" IS NEXT, BUT THE 1044 00:38:09,120 --> 00:38:12,490 "SINNERS" SOUNDTRACK IS HERE 1045 00:38:12,490 --> 00:38:13,591 NOW. 1046 00:38:13,591 --> 00:38:15,593 RAPHAEL SAADIQ, MILES CATON AND 1047 00:38:15,593 --> 00:38:19,097 LUDWIG GORANSSON WITH "I LIED TO 1048 00:38:19,097 --> 00:38:20,431 YOU." 1049 00:38:20,431 --> 00:38:21,533 ♪ SOMETHING I BEEN 1050 00:38:21,533 --> 00:38:22,634 WANTING TO TELL YOU 1051 00:38:22,634 --> 00:38:28,106 FOR A LONG TIME ♪ 1052 00:38:28,106 --> 00:38:29,774 ♪ HOPE IT DON'T HURT YOU 1053 00:38:30,274 --> 00:38:30,809 LOSE YOUR MIND ♪ 1054 00:38:30,809 --> 00:38:32,443 ♪ WHEN I WAS JUST A BOY 1055 00:38:32,443 --> 00:38:35,346 'BOUT EIGHT YEARS OLD 1056 00:38:35,346 --> 00:38:37,382 YOU THREW ME A BIBLE ♪ 1057 00:38:37,382 --> 00:38:38,983 ♪ ON THAT MISSISSIPPI ROAD 1058 00:38:38,983 --> 00:38:42,287 SEE I LOVE YA PAPA ♪ 1059 00:38:42,287 --> 00:38:44,422 ♪ YOU DID ALL YOU COULD DO 1060 00:38:44,422 --> 00:38:47,192 THEY SAY THE TRUTH HURTS 1061 00:38:47,192 --> 00:38:50,295 SO I LIED TO YOU ♪ 1062 00:38:50,295 --> 00:38:52,630 ♪ YES I LIED TO YOU 1063 00:38:52,630 --> 00:38:55,867 I LOVE THE BLUES ♪ 1064 00:38:55,867 --> 00:39:00,271 ♪ MMM 1065 00:39:00,271 --> 00:39:05,343 MM MM MM MM ♪ 1066 00:39:05,343 --> 00:39:14,285 ♪ MMM 1067 00:39:14,285 --> 00:39:15,587 MM MM MM MM 1068 00:39:15,587 --> 00:39:19,824 SOMEBODY TAKE ME 1069 00:39:20,324 --> 00:39:20,324 ♪ 1070 00:39:20,324 --> 00:39:23,094 IN YOUR ARMS TONIGHT 1071 00:39:23,094 --> 00:39:27,465 THAT'S RIGHT 1072 00:39:27,965 --> 00:39:29,667 ♪ WELL ALRIGHT 1073 00:39:29,667 --> 00:39:31,803 SOMEBODY, TAKE ME 1074 00:39:31,803 --> 00:39:35,673 IN YOUR ARMS TONIGHT ♪ 1075 00:39:35,673 --> 00:39:41,145 ♪ ALRIGHT COME ON MILES 1076 00:39:41,645 --> 00:39:46,284 SOMEBODY TAKE ME 1077 00:39:46,284 --> 00:39:48,720 IN YOUR ARMS TONIGHT ♪ 1078 00:39:48,720 --> 00:39:50,355 ♪ I HOPE YOU CAN STAND IT 1079 00:39:50,355 --> 00:39:54,259 STAND IT ALL ♪ 1080 00:39:54,259 --> 00:39:56,327 ♪ 'CAUSE WHAT L'M 1081 00:39:56,827 --> 00:39:59,063 YOU DIDN'T PREACH AT ALL ♪ 1082 00:39:59,063 --> 00:40:02,300 ♪ SEE I'M FULL OF THE BLUES 1083 00:40:02,300 --> 00:40:03,434 HOLY WATER TOO ♪ 1084 00:40:03,434 --> 00:40:05,570 ♪ I KNOW THE TRUTH HURTS 1085 00:40:05,570 --> 00:40:06,671 SO YOU DID WHAT 1086 00:40:06,671 --> 00:40:10,308 SO I LIED TO YOU ♪ 1087 00:40:10,308 --> 00:40:11,609 ♪ SO PREACH ON 1088 00:40:11,609 --> 00:40:13,845 SPEAK YOUR WORDS 1089 00:40:13,845 --> 00:40:16,547 I KNOW THE TRUTH HURTS. 1090 00:40:16,547 --> 00:40:18,750 SO I LIED TO YOU 1091 00:40:18,750 --> 00:40:22,086 YES I LIED TO YOU ♪ 1092 00:40:22,086 --> 00:40:24,856 ♪ I LOVE THE BLUES 1093 00:40:24,856 --> 00:40:29,327 I LOVE THE BLUES ♪ 1094 00:40:29,327 --> 00:40:32,630 ♪ MMM 1095 00:40:32,630 --> 00:40:35,900 MM MM MM MM 1096 00:40:35,900 --> 00:40:38,303 HEY HEY HEY ♪ 1097 00:40:38,303 --> 00:40:41,372 ♪ MMM 1098 00:40:41,372 --> 00:40:50,014 MM MM MM MM ♪ 1099 00:40:50,014 --> 00:40:53,818 ♪ WELL SOMEBODY TAKE ME 1100 00:40:53,818 --> 00:40:58,156 IN YOUR ARMS TONIGHT 1101 00:40:58,156 --> 00:41:02,293 WELL ALRIGHT ♪ 1102 00:41:02,293 --> 00:41:04,095 ♪ WILL SOMEBODY 1103 00:41:04,095 --> 00:41:06,764 PLEASE TAKE ME 1104 00:41:06,764 --> 00:41:11,636 IN YOUR ARMS TONIGHT YEAH ♪ 1105 00:41:11,636 --> 00:41:20,411 ♪ WELL SOMEBODY TAKE ME 1106 00:41:20,411 --> 00:41:24,749 IN YOUR ARMS TONIGHT ♪ 1107 00:41:24,749 --> 00:41:28,052 ♪ YEAH 1108 00:41:28,052 --> 00:41:31,289 OH OH ♪ 1109 00:41:31,289 --> 00:41:38,296 ♪ YEAH YEAH YEAH 1110 00:41:38,796 --> 00:41:40,031 ♪ YEAH YEAH YEAH 1111 00:41:40,031 --> 00:41:42,767 HEY 1112 00:41:42,767 --> 00:41:46,871 IN YOUR ARMS ♪ 1113 00:41:46,871 --> 00:41:50,608 ♪ 1114 00:41:50,608 --> 00:41:56,147 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 72031

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