Original subtitles

12 virgins are heading towards a paradise island

to take part in a unique experiment.

The word "virgin", people see it as a joke.

It's quite upsetting.

I'm 23, still a virgin.

I feel like there's something wrong with me.

In a world where sex is everywhere...

My God. Terrified, absolutely terrified.

..the truth is surprising.

There are more adult virgins than ever.

Being a young adult in this day and age is difficult.

Social media. Dating apps. Influencers.

TV shows. Porn. Porn. Porn. Porn. Porn is everywhere.

Are you self-conscious about our genitals touching each other?

Now... Yeah.

..this radical retreat is offering a very hands-on solution.

Oh, yeah.

She's a miracle worker.

Woohoo! Oh, God, yes.

Overseen by a group of experts...

Yeah. Like that? I like that.

..ready to do anything to help Britain's virgins...

There's the clitoris. Do you have any questions?

..lose the one thing...

Do I make you feel nervous?

..they feel is holding them back.

I would love to have sex with you.

I do feel like there's a barrier between me and sex.

I want to lose my virginity. It's now or never.

But when the moment arrives...

Would you like to move to the bed?

..who will be ready...

I just don't want anyone to touch me.

..to go all...the way?

MAN: You're so sexy.

WOMAN: That feels so good.

Here they come.

Can you imagine how scared they are?

Aloha! Hey! Welcome.

For the next two weeks... Welcome, my friend.

..this experimental retreat will be home

to 12 young people from all over the UK...

So good to meet you. Want a hug?

Yeah, go on. ..who desperately want help.

Welcome, so good to meet you.

Everyone's so spiritual.

I could be a 40-year-old virgin.

I feel like I'm on a really bad route right now,

and I need... I need something to change.

Hey, Tom, I'm Devah. Ah, nice to meet you.

Do you need a hand getting out?

Er, yes, I will do. Yeah, cheers.

I'd describe myself as a nerd because I feel I look like one -

the glasses, perhaps not the best physique.

So if I can lose my virginity,

that's one less thing for people to ridicule me over.

Hi!

They're here to learn...

Hi. Would you like a hug?

Um, I'm all right, thank you.

..from some of the world's most experienced experts

on how to embrace intimacy.

Oh, hello.

Welcome. Thank you.

I just can't do touch. I don't know why.

I've never had a girlfriend.

My fear is that I'm always going to be a virgin.

I'm like, what am I doing wrong?

I've never been abroad before,

so if anything, I've popped my flying virginity.

Yay!

My social life's non-existent.

I've got two cats. I feed them, I look after them, but they attack me.

But I know they love me in their own way. But, yeah, not very social.

This is where you'll be staying.

For the duration of their stay...

Home, sweet home.

I mean, it's not quite my usual colour.

..they'll wear a retreat outfit...

You know, like, prisoners who get out on good behaviour

to go pick up litter?

That's sort of the colour palette we're working with.

..so they can focus on themselves, not their image.

Basic, but comfy.

I would like to walk away from the island

with more self-confidence

because when you see a lot of celebrities on Instagram,

they just have everything so perfect.

Comparing myself to people online disrupted my self-esteem,

and it's something that I've been struggling with for so long.

It is so easy to say,

"Don't worry about the way you look in the mirror",

but then it's so hard to put that into action.

I think once I'm more content with myself,

I will then be able to live life,

and losing my virginity would probably be my final goal.

This is going to be your hang-out zone.

Oh, that looks fantastic. It's beautiful.

I can't get over how clear the water is.

Before the course begins,

the group have a chance to get to know each other at the hang-out.

Ooh, hello.

Hey, guys. Are you OK?

I'm Taylor. Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you.

I am bisexual.

I do know what I'm interested in,

but with boys and girls,

the only experiences I've had have been negative.

You kind of feel like it's just you who's having this issue,

nobody else is.

INTERVIEWER: Is that quite isolating?

Yeah, it's very isolating, yeah.

Sorry.

Oh, hello.

Hi, I'm Tom. I'm Zac.

Zac, nice to meet you, Zac, how are you, OK?

Very good, yeah.

I went to university for three years,

but I was depressed in many ways

by the fact that I'm a virgin.

I didn't get the degree that I should have got.

And ever since, I've been stuck

doing jobs that I never really wanted to do.

I'm tired of the person that I've become.

It can't go on.

Mmm.

The group sessions are where most of the touch stuff's going to be done.

The thing I'm dreading is hugging.

Did you not hug at the start? No. Or handshakes?

I shook their hands, I don't do hugs. Yeah, I shook their hand.

Oh. I would have been like, "No".

I'd jump in the water. I don't do hugging.

It's the therapy itself that scares me now.

I'm just getting more and more tense.

The virgins are clearly nervous about what lies ahead,

and that's understandable. It's a course like no other...

OK, good.

..set up by ground-breaking sex therapists Celeste and Danielle.

Eyes closed.

What's going to happen on this island is mind-blowing.

Breathe.

One in eight people at age 26 are still virgins in the UK.

This is happening all over the world.

Even the French are having less sex.

With a team of international sex coaches

trained in different touch therapies,

they'll help the group

try to overcome their worries around virginity.

Tucked away on the island are sexy therapy spaces and bedrooms

where they can practise the art of intimacy.

You can't really learn how to play a guitar from a book,

and you can't learn how to give and receive pleasure

by just talking about it.

Sometimes the only way to help someone is to get physical.

They don't know it yet,

but each phase of the course will push them to their very limits...

CHEERING

..as they take their first steps

to sexual confidence.

That feels so good.

Let's go.

It's a process that starts now...

They're there waiting for us, Oh, God. Oh, no.

..with the foundation of all sexual attraction...

Welcome! Welcome.

..desire.

We are so excited to start our workshops today,

and the first phase of this course is desire and letting shame go.

Shame is very much attached to desire and turn-ons,

and so much of shame melts away

when people come together and start to talk about sex.

Each of you need to have a space and a pillow.

The first exercise will give Celeste and Danielle

a clear idea of who in the group is open to desire...

Wonderful, start by closing your eyes.

..and who may be resistant.

Just listening to my voice - ahhh.

I'm going to start by taking a nice, deep breath.

Ahhhhhh.

I'm going to make lots of noise too, by the way.

This may not be most people's idea of sex,

but for virgins,

Celeste and Danielle's research shows,

it's a great way to tune in to your body.

Breathwork is very powerful.

We use breath to help people expand on sensations,

release emotions.

So breath is key.

I'm going to up the speed of the breath.

Ahhhh.

Ahhhh.

OK, who is willing to make sound with me?

OTHERS JOIN IN: Ahhhh.

Ahhhh.

Some are throwing themselves in.

Ahhhh.

Wonderful, you're doing it, I love it, good job.

But others seem more sceptical,

and for touch-phobic Jason...

..it's more than he can handle.

OTHERS: Ahhh.

Ahh, it's amazing how much breath we can take

to warm up our body to feel more

and experience more,.

Get it in, yeah.

Check your feet, yeah. I love this dance.

Ahhhh.

With the next breath, we're going to raise our hands.

Ooooh!

Wonderful. Great, OK.

Celeste and Danielle move onto the next exercise...

Start by pairing up.

..to teach them that before saying yes, it's OK to say no.

All right, so this exercise is about saying no.

So, one of you is going to ask the other person for three things,

and then the other person is going to say no.

Go on, think of something.

Can I borrow £50?

Oh, no.

We need people to feel safe.

If people don't feel safe,

they won't feel safe to open up and start and try new things.

Can I have a go on your golf cart?

Absolutely not, no.

Can I...? I don't know what to say!

When I'm around a member of the opposite sex, I'm very awkward.

Can I punch you in the face?

No.

I tend to say things without thinking.

Can I throw you in the sea? No.

I wish it was different.

I'd love to be able to speak to a girl,

keep a conversation and go on a date,

that's my kind of dream.

Can I feed you to a lion?

No.

Mine are all violent!

Take a seat. Yeah, just sit and relax.

The level of inexperience is clear,

so Celeste and Danielle decide to test

how the group reacts to intense intimacy.

I want to give you a little demo of what you might get

to tease your appetite a little bit.

Andre?

We call it "up against the wall."

DANIELLE SIGHS BREATHILY

Ohh.

Ohhhh.

Witnessing sexual desire, for most of this group,

is clearly unsettling.

DANIELLE MOANS

MORE BREATHING AND MOANING

Ohhh.

Mmm.

OK.

I actually want to get your first, sort of, like, visceral response.

It was like watching a sex scene with your parents, but times 100.

Quite uncomfortable, to be honest, watching that.

So let yourself have any feelings.

If you want to laugh, laugh,

if you want to cry, cry, it's all OK.

This big insecurity that I have when it comes to my looks

means I can't imagine that someone would want to be with me in any way,

where you are so stuck in this mindset

that someone would be ashamed to walk down the street with you,

it's like a never-ending cycle,

like a roundabout that doesn't stop.

When I was growing up, I would always get labelled as the DUFF,

which is "designated ugly fat friend."

So I would always believe that I was ugly.

So I think there's a lot that I need to work on.

All right. We're going to come in a circle.

Big round of applause.

Whoo!

LAUGHTER

Thank you all, bye.

What have I got myself into?

I feel like I'm in a cult.

I'd be lying if I said it wasn't weird.

They seem cultish.

It just seems they've got this island

where they live in a completely different world.

The up against the wall was interesting.

By the end, I'd love to be able to do that.

I could not look after he kicked her legs apart,

that was too aggressive.

I think that's actually most intimate I've ever seen people...

Be in front of you. ..in person.

I don't think I was fully ready for that.

Because I'm so shut off to that sort of world,

I've never felt that sort of emotion.

I've walked away feeling really overwhelmed.

So I'm a bit, like, brain-boggled at the minute.

The course has just begun,

and so far they've only had a taste

of the unconventional methods ahead.

The next workshop may be tougher,

and I may actually not be ready for that.

Do you reckon there's any dead bodies in the water?

Do you reckon? Probably.

It's halfway through day one on Virgin Island.

Coming out as a virgin is difficult

because I think in this day and age, people see it as such a negative.

For men, we hide it if you're a virgin,

mostly because of how other men will see them. 100%, yeah.

I told someone in our office that I'm a virgin,

and everyone who comes in, they tell everyone.

LAUGHTER

I wish I was, like, smart enough to just say,

"Yeah, I've had lots of the sex."

People have so much shame about being a virgin.

I think between romcoms and porn,

there's so much perfectionism that's put out there.

Like, it's so much pressure

that they're just terrified to try anything at all.

That's where we come in.

Each step of the way,

the experts will share notes with each other about the group.

When you did the up against the wall exercise, she started crying.

And after an emotional reaction during this morning's workshop,

their first concern is Emma.

I could see her face. She was, like, really feeling it, really intense.

It was too much for her to see it, really.

She was, like, picturing herself in this situation,

and she got very overwhelmed. Like, that was my sense.

Every afternoon,

there are one on one sessions across the island,

and first, the experts want Emma

to explore her boundaries around intimacy with Thomas.

Going 23 years being single,

I've never had the experience of someone romantically touching me.

If I ever got presented with the situation of sex,

I worry that I could have a panic attack.

Hello, Emma, welcome. Hi, you OK?

I've never masturbated

and I've never experienced an orgasm, no.

There's no way that I could experience one, I don't think.

I want to propose you a little game around touch.

OK. You just ask for the kind of touch you really like.

OK. Yeah.

What would make you happy to receive?

It's not something that I'm like,

"Oh, I wish someone would touch me there", do you know what I mean?

I don't think like that.

Yeah.

Um, maybe, yeah, maybe you could touch my knee?

OK. Yeah.

The idea is to test how Emma reacts to escalating touch.

Thank you.

Do you want to try somewhere else

where you feel it might be more, like, involved?

Maybe if you try upper thigh?

When it gets to up this bit, it gets a little bit like,

"Oh, God, like, what's going to happen?", sort of thing.

It feels like you mean you have some...

Fear.

I feel like if you went around here,

I probably would have maybe had a panic attack.

I did as much as I could and I pushed myself to my limit

for the level I'm currently at,

but I don't think I was fully ready for it.

I feel quite drained. I feel a bit upset.

Well, thank you so much, Emma, and, yeah, I will just come with you.

I feel she is kind of a bit stuck.

Thank you. See you again. Take care. See you later, bye-bye.

She was going through it, but really one toe at a time,

one step at a time.

Emma's struggling.

Hello, Charlotte, do you want a hug?

No, I'm all right, thank you.

And as some of the others

experience their first taste of touch therapy...

What's coming up for you?

Um, I know it's a simple thing,

but I feel like I'm doing a bad job.

..it's clear Emma's not the only one finding it difficult.

OK, right up close, yep.

Out of 100, how intimate would you describe it?

Yeah, probably like 90.

I think that's where we call it.

Take a step backwards, please.

But bucking the trend is Zac.

Oh, come on in! I'm so excited.

I am as well.

After throwing himself into the first workshop...

Voila. ..the experts want to test how far Zac is ready to go.

I've always wanted to be accepted,

I've always wanted to be liked by others.

It's something I haven't felt I've had at many points in my life.

I know you feel also like a failure around sexuality, right?

Big time, yeah,

it's just so hard to let go of that.

Of course. I don't know if I can. I know.

Can I just have a tissue, please? Wipe these away.

Have the box.

Sex was a taboo.

My family never, even to this day, talks about it.

I grew up seeing my dad only once a week,

and he never talked about it.

So I can't get tips or ask someone,

"Hey, how do I attract a woman?"

It feels like I should have figured that all that out a long time ago.

Also, I don't feel attractive or handsome.

Um, I assume that the way that other people see me

is negative, I think, generally.

I want to play a fantasy with you.

Really?

Danielle believes her methods can give Zac the confidence he needs.

How close? This close?

That's all right, yeah.

But it's not like any therapy he may have seen before.

Mmm.

I'm just going to kiss you gently. Mmm-hmm.

And I want you to see if you can really take it in, OK?

ZAC: Mmmmm.

Mmm.

SHE WHISPERS: How does that feel?

Good.

HE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY

Oh, now I start to feel your arousal.

Oh, my God, this is so sexy.

Her hands on technique works by giving Zac a physical experience...

I just love how you bite your lip.

..a form of somatic, or touch therapy.

Mmm.

Somatic therapy believes that just talking with someone

is not going to be sufficient,

and we really need to help people through the body

in order to really create some sort of change.

Thank you.

Thank you.

No-one's ever said that I'm sexy. No-one.

I'm feeling fuzzy, all over.

In that session alone,

I've done things that I've been craving for a long time.

Go conquer the world.

I'm making tonnes of progress.

Back in the hang-out,

the others are keen to find out more.

Hello! Where have you been?

Been off to the one to one session. Was it good?

Yeah, actually, it was pretty intense, a lot of neck kissing.

Do you need a minute?

LAUGHTER Yeah.

The first day at the retreat

has shown just how many issues the group has

around sex, shame and intimacy.

And as the sun sets on the island...

I can see them staring at us. Oh, I can just sense dread.

..Celeste and Danielle have one last exercise.

Hello!

So, you each brought an item

that is about letting go of some piece of shame

that you're ready to be done with,

and we can't wait to hear your stories.

They'll each share a story that represents a past failure,

in the hope that they can move on.

I'll go.

My item is about my first year of uni.

I ended up having feelings for my flatmate.

So I decided to get her a necklace,

but before I could give it to her,

she made it very clear we were never going to be anything.

I didn't handle the rejection too well

and I just beat myself up every day about it

in terms of how I ended things with her.

This is my first ever Rubik's Cube,

and the way I treat a lot of relationships is like a puzzle.

I think that gets in the way.

This is a gift that one of my...well, my only ex got me.

I didn't really think it meant that much,

and I should have thrown it out a while ago.

This is a hoodie from a time in my life when I...

I just felt really worthless,

and I didn't see a future for myself.

This is a diary from one of my only dating relationships

that I felt was too much for me at the time,

and it's something I really need to let go of.

I went a bit...more literal.

I have expired condoms.

LAUGHTER

My mate gave these to me before a house party

and said, "You're definitely going to need these", and I didn't.

I think if anything signifies sexual failure,

it's having condoms go out of date.

MORE LAUGHTER

So mine is a childhood photo.

I found it quite difficult to express emotions when I was this age

and I was more of a people-pleaser,

to the point where I'd end up really damaging myself

because I was more worried about their feelings rather than my own.

But I want to let go of the people-pleasing aspect.

If you don't love yourself,

how the hell are you going to love anyone else?

Thank you so much, you're amazing.

OK, well, you made us cry.

This was really deep and really meaningful,

and we're just so proud of you.

Yeah, amazed, actually amazed.

Oh, how did you feel?

I wanted to, you know, say goodbye to it.

Maybe it's like pulling a Band-Aid off.

I walked into it a bit sceptical on how I was going to feel.

I'm trying to open myself up to learning new things,

but I don't know whether I've achieved a lot

and I'm not looking forward to what tomorrow may hold.

Jeez Louise.

It was an intense day, very long day.

Tensions are only going to get higher.

Yep.

THUNDER RUMBLES

Stormy night last night,

Stormy weather, I think, means upheaval, change?

Morning. Morning, guys. Morning!

It's day two at the retreat.

Smoothie? It's strawberry milk. Go on.

The morning after last night's shame exercise...

How are you guys feeling about the presentation last night?

I wasn't expecting to be quite as emotional.

Yeah. I didn't really enjoy it.

..now, the experts hope the next exercise

will move from shame back to desire.

We want to see what motivates them around sex,

and there's nothing more explicit than writing your erotic story.

THUNDER RUMBLES

The storm clouds are circling,

but it's not just the weather the group are bracing themselves for.

Hello! Hello! Hello, Danielle.

OK.

Your next exercise...

..write your hottest sexual fantasy, OK?

Oh, my!

It's a fantasy, so let yourself go with it,

don't hold back, OK?

Ciao ciao! Wonderful to see you, bye! Oh, my God.

Did she say hottest or hardest?

Hottest. Oh, blimey, Christ.

I want to go inside.

Is anyone feeling a bit sick about writing this?

I certainly expect 12 virgins to struggle

with writing an erotic story.

I don't think they will have much of a clue

about what they want in terms of sexuality,

but, you know, we shall see.

This needs to have backing music over it

and it's like...bow chica wow wow!

Celeste and Danielle want to test

how in touch they are with their desires.

So far, I've got a couple of openings.

"It was a dark and stormy night," obviously a classic.

Confident after his one on one session with Danielle yesterday,

Zac is quick off the mark.

"Never before has he been so surprised", is my other one.

Think I'll try that, yeah.

But for others, revealing their innermost desires doesn't come easy.

50 Shades Of Grey and stuff, I've never read that.

I'm not erotic, so I have no idea what to write.

Like, right now, I'm writing, "I've bought a lottery ticket."

It's hard to say what my dream would be in a sexual manner

when I haven't really been open to having a sexual manner,

if that makes sense.

I'm trying to open myself up to learning new things,

but it's difficult to do that

when you're not happy with yourself.

I haven't written anything.

I'm a senior parliamentary researcher for an MP in parliament.

I deal with the public

and I'm actually in a public speakers' club,

and I'm perfectly comfortable doing that.

But the thought of having sex with just one person,

for whatever reason, that just really is, is quite frightening.

Oh, you've written a novel.

Once you get started, it's a lot easier, right,

once you've got an idea.

I don't even know how I'd write more than a page, to be honest with you.

Just pick a subject and start from there.

Yeah, I suppose. And then just make it real sexy.

Right? Oh, that's not me.

Whatever floats your boat, you know? You're way more confident than I am.

ZAC LAUGHS

Yeah, it's quite scary.

Oh, God, we're in the amphitheatre.

Stories written, the experts will watch to see who's embracing...

Welcome back, everyone.

Morning!

..and who's hiding their true desires.

So, we're going to invite you to share your fantasy with us.

I'm not ready for this.

Anyone want to volunteer to go first?

Take the leap, it can be so empowering.

I'll go first, yeah?

So, my fantasy, it starts with me walking towards my castle.

As I enter, I am greeted by Sofia Vergara,

the Latina lady from Modern Family.

She would say how great my castle is,

and how my wife is a lucky lady.

I would then proceed to my master bedroom

due to hearing my name being called

by an almost angelic voice, my wife - brackets

(not married as I don't want to lose the castle in the divorce.)

LAUGHTER

The sex is unbelievable.

The best way to describe it

is for you to imagine your very own fantasy

and multiply the pleasure by ten.

CHEERING

As more of the group step up...

We reached a bit of land, covered in rocks.

"Fuck, there's our luggage, hope she doesn't find my cum socks."

LAUGHTER

..some are struggling to reveal their desires.

Instead, they're hiding behind humour.

I didn't even get the chance to write anything

because I had writer's block, but, you know, I've thought about it

and I'd be with either Angelina Jolie or Anne Hathaway.

We'd be watching Villa win the Champions League.

You know, she'd be just wearing a Villa top and that'd be that.

LAUGHTER

Others...

A sigh, a kiss, hot air against skin,

fingers dancing across one another,

the both of us would enjoy the experience fully.

..seem happier to share their real fantasies and feelings.

Aphrodite requires tributes made to her,

an act of physical love by a devoted and naive nymph.

We'd head back to my house

and she'd sort of lead me upstairs.

You know, I'd pick her up,

take her down on the bed

and I'd probably... do something with oral sex,

I don't know what I'm doing.

LAUGHTER

We'd just naturally just start kissing

and she'd bite my lip, pull down on it...

..and, yeah, that's what it'd be like.

Let's go.

Go, Zac!

But it's Zac who has the most explicit story of all.

The shadow descended from the top of the hill,

upon which stood a towering warrior.

He removed his helmet to expose his fiery hair.

A maiden stood forth.

"Remove your sandals", she commanded.

Obligingly, he knelt down.

In that moment, she lifted her skirt

and forced his head between her knees.

She let out a moan of pure ecstasy.

She removed her dress, exposing her breasts and naked body.

The warrior entered her many times, their bodies becoming one.

CHEERING AND WHOOPING

Go, Zac!

That's just the first chapter.

Anyone else feeling brave?

OK.

Yesterday's session with Thomas

revealed the extent of Emma's issues around intimacy,

but her erotic story could offer more insight.

SHE CLEARS HER THROAT

OK.

My ideal fantasy

would be a person coming into my life, unexpected...

..a genuine, honest, supportive and kind male

with no expectation of me,

who has a genuine, big heart,

a love for the world,

to treat others how we wish to be treated

and to be happy and have the opportunity to grow together.

CHEERING

You were fantastic, really amazing, right, Celeste?

That was phenomenal.

Phenomenal.

Gather your stuff, thank you so much. Thank you.

I really liked yours.

When I'm awkward, I try and make jokes.

My story wasn't very sexual.

It's how I deal with awkward situations

of things that I don't really know what to do,

it's just a defence mechanism for me.

But everyone seemed to like it and laugh at it,

so better than I thought.

I felt really good actually getting up there.

The story I was telling showed a lot about myself

and, you know, I can see what experiences I want to have now.

It was actually a little bit of a confidence boost,

pushing myself and having the courage to go up there

and do that sort of thing.

It made me feel a lot better afterwards.

A lot of people say to me, "Oh, you look young."

I think a lot of people at home think I'm 18, 19, 20,

but then I always say, "Oh, it's because I've never had a boyfriend,

"so I haven't been stressed out."

You've never had a boyfriend?

No, no.

After a successful workshop,

the dynamics between the girls and boys seem to be shifting.

You definitely seem like one of the most confident

out of all of us, I'd say. Thank you.

I've worked very hard to be this confident.

I, er...

I think you're really pretty.

Thank you.

I don't want to be in the sun for too long. OK.

It was nice having that chat with you.

Do you think Ben likes me?

I've not noticed him being off with you or anyone else.

No, it's just that I think he "likes me" likes me.

Oh, like THAT way? Oh, OK - oh, I don't know.

While sparks fly between Ben and Charlotte...

..not everyone is finding island life quite so easy.

I think Jason needs a lot of, like, basic,

"This is how you do this, this is how you do this."

It's just, it's going to take time for him to,

to feel that empowerment around touching other people, I think.

Weirdly enough, my sex education,

because I moved school,

I missed the sex ed week,

so basically, South Park's my sex education.

I've never touched a condom.

The only thing I could know about women's anatomy and stuff

would be from TV, the internet, that kind of thing.

I feel like if it was a game, I'm level one at intimacy

and I'd love to be able to level up, in a way.

I sound like a virgin explaining that. Oh, God.

KNOCKING AT DOOR

Come on in. So the experts have planned a session

on the basics of touch with Celeste.

I've never really been a touchy-feely person.

Yeah.

My family's like that, though.

Like, my mum, she's never been a touchy, huggy person,

but I know she loves me and I love her,

but just can't do hugs, it's just not in our nature.

I want to try putting my hand on top of your hand

and see how that feels. More...

More intimate, yeah.

Exactly. So I could scooch to you...

After this morning's workshop,

Celeste wants to learn more about the real Jason behind the humour.

Let's take some steps, you know. Yeah.

And we can see, like, do you like putting your hand on mine,

do you like me putting my hand on yours, for example?

So do you want to start? Shall I?

Yeah, just put it on there. Like that? Yeah.

Is it OK? Like, does the sensation feel good?

It's OK, yeah.

OK. So can we try it where I put my hand on your hand? OK, yeah.

OK. I feel like because it's happening to me, it's like...

A little overwhelming? Yeah.

Yeah.

Feeling uncomfortable receiving touch...

When I work in offices and stuff,

I'm a bit worried that I'm a bit too firm with handshakes. Mm-hmm.

..Jason takes matters into his own hands.

Right. Like that?

That feels good. Is that OK?

I would even, like, let our palms touch a little bit more.

OK.

Like that? Do you feel more like, more...? Yeah, OK.

That kind of touch? Yeah.

On safer territory...

It feels so limp. You can give a little bit more pressure. One more?

Yeah, let's do one more. ..Jason's flying.

Like that?

That was beautiful.

Success!

I was shitting myself, because I had no idea what I was in for.

Thank you.

But I think it's just getting more intimate with touch.

I want to be improved, I want to be cured.

Who wants a butt plug?

I don't want to touch it.

I don't think this has been inside...

I don't know if it's been inside anyone.

To encourage the group to broaden their sexual horizons...

A couple more butt plugs, I'll be like Wolverine.

..the experts have handed over a box of sex toys...

Ooh, these are fun.

If that's up your butt and you fart with enough power,

could you actually blow it out?

..and left them to explore.

Who wants to be tied up?

Go on, then. You know, you'd be in the bed

and this would be tied to, like, the thingy. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's just helped reinforce for me that when I have sex,

it's going to be vanilla, just vanilla sex for me.

I'm going to leave you like that now.

Charlotte!

Who wants the feather?

Yeah.

How does it feel?

Makes me feel like I'm being stroked by a chicken.

I want to lose my virginity on the retreat, absolutely.

All of the shame

and the self-criticism that come with being a virgin,

my hope would be that afterwards, that would be gone

because you're not any more,

you don't have to put this label on yourself any more.

So far, Zac has adapted quickly to the course.

Comfortable with hugs? Absolutely, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Zac is starting to stand taller, he's more confident.

Please have a seat.

And after our last session, I think he's ready

for our most advanced therapy

working with a surrogate partner,

a highly trained therapist able to have sex with a client.

Today, I'm here to give you

the introduction into surrogate partner therapy -

what my role is, what Kat's role is,

and you know a little bit about how this process works.

Surrogate partner therapy has been around for quite a while

and it involves a therapist, a client and a surrogate partner.

It starts pretty slow with clothes on,

embodiment exercises,

just while we're kind of like getting used to each other

and I can learn what you like, and vice versa.

The surrogate is helping them explore what it feels like

to take your clothes off with someone,

what it feels like to touch someone in an erotic way,

and can go all the way to a full sexual experience.

As you're comfortable, we'll move to more organic encounters,

kissing, oral, intercourse.

It will eventually feel like just practising different sexual skills.

That's the gist, yeah.

OK, cool, got it.

This is a container for you to practise a relationship.

So I am a licensed mental health clinician.

You will be working with me

with regards to any emotions that come up,

and that's my side of the street.

Got it. I'm going to let you two have the remainder of the session.

I will see you guys soon, take care.

Is there anything else you want to talk about

before we move to some body work?

I don't think so, no, I'm good. OK, I'm going to have you lie down.

Mm-hmm.

So I'm going to touch you first,

and I'm only going to touch your arm

and I'm going to use my hands, my arms,

my face and my hair, if that's OK? Yeah.

HE LAUGHS

VOICEOVER: I think it's really important

to teach people how to have sex -

teaching, like, really basic relationship skills,

then clothes come off,

things get more erotic.

Helping people be human again,

it makes me want to do my job.

Whilst sex is the ultimate aim,

Zac must build a connection with Kat before getting to that level.

How was that?

It was good. I was tingly, but in a good way.

Are you ready to switch?

Mm-hmm. Yeah? Let's go.

A surrogate partner bond...

Really make sure you're feeling what feels good.

..takes time to nurture, like any relationship.

I think we're done.

You're done? Yeah, yeah.

What came up just then that made you feel like stopping?

I think, you know, touching your arm is great, it feels amazing.

It's just, obviously, I want more.

Ah, OK. But it's a process.

You know that I wouldn't do more than that

on a first session with anybody.

The speed of the surrogate programme

doesn't seem to be moving fast enough for Zac.

So, how far are you wanting to go with surrogate partner therapy?

I would like to go all the way.

I would love to have sex with you, you know.

It's why I came here, really. Yeah.

It's hard to connect with someone you've just met,

telling you, "Hey, I'm your surrogate. You will be eventually,

"maybe, if you want, having sex with me. "

So, let's stand up.

Let's just shake it all out.

But I do think that I'll be able lose my virginity,

you know, have sex with Kat eventually. I would like to.

Zac, how was it? Yeah, so we were doing arm touching.

It was, like, intense.

Like, I didn't realise I'd have that strong of a reaction, to be honest.

You know, maybe I'll lose my virginity very soon,

but, yeah, a very positive experience, I think.

Ready, guys?

Oh, we're down here with a big fire.

After two days at the retreat... Ready, guys?

..the first phase of the course is drawing to a close.

Shame bonfire is a culmination

of everything that we've done in the first phase.

It's a chance for them to get rid of their shame items from yesterday

and move on.

We're going to call you up one at a time

to let these old stories about yourselves

and these old ways of thinking and being go.

And I am so delighted for you.

OK.

Are you ready to let it go?

Yes!

OTHERS: Let it go! Let it go!

CHEERING

Let it go! Let it go! Let it go!

The act of burning something

is the act of letting go and saying, "I can change now."

Ready? Let it go! Let it go!

It felt really good

to be able to release all my feelings into the fire.

I feel a lot more confident.

It's like a whole refresh of emotions.

Let it go! Let it go!

Let it go!

CHEERING

I was stuck in a rut, stuck in my way of thinking.

And I think this is my opportunity now

to really change that.

I'm keen to fill in more of the gaps. Woohoo!

Next time... You're quite attractive, so I mean, you know...

..things heat up on the touch phase of the course.

Mmm.

There's another animal here with you on this rug. Ohhh.

It was like watching a porno.

As emotions bubble over...

I just don't want anyone to touch me.

Can I just have one minute?

..when things turn physical.

I can touch your breasts? You can, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

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