All language subtitles for The Last Woman on Earth

(dramatic music)

(animals shrieking) (crowd yelling)

(speaking in foreign language)

Ev, you want to bet on the last one?

No, thank you.

Oh, come on, it'll make it
a little more interesting.

Isn't it interesting enough?

Well, I thought you
wanted to see Puerto Rico.

Well, this is part...

It's the part you wanted to see, Harold.

(speaking in foreign language)

Harold?

Harold?

Martin, you're early.

You're late.

And you're in trouble, remember?

Oh, I haven't seen today's.

Thank you.

Boy, they really make me sound bad.

Indicted.

You know, that word really gets me.

Sounds like it really means something.

Maybe it does.

Harold, really, you ought to
worry a little bit about this.

I never worry, Martin.

I hire brilliant young lawyers
like you to do that for me.

Oh, you want to make a bet?
This is the last fight.

No, thanks.

Well, I do.

There goes my bookie now.

(crowd yelling)

Cigarette?

I'm Ev Gern.

Harold's wife?

Occasionally.

Thank you.

I fail to see the point of two animals

clawing each other to death around a ring.

I'm with you.

Hey, these bookies are
a bunch of cheap crooks.

What happened, did you meet your match?

Ha-ha, I said cheap.

Oh, have you two met?

We introduced ourselves.

I got married between trials.

Martin and his firm
defended me the last year

when the same thing happened.

It's the government's idea of an annuity.

Every year, they sue me.

It's called the Harold Gern vacation fund.

I bet that one.

You bet that one?

That one.

You'll win.

(animals shrieking)

Oh.

Ev, what is it?

I spilled my drink.

I'll have to change.

OK hon, OK.

You wait here, I'll be right back.

I got to collect my bet.

And we'll find a place to talk?

Then we'll find a place to talk.

Eight, rolling.

Nine, a winner.

Pay the line.

(upbeat music)

Coming out again.

Same players, hoorah.

Harold, this isn't my
idea of a place to talk.

You're too conservative my boy.

Seven, winner.

Winner at seven, pay the line.

Couldn't be better, couldn't be better.

Let it all ride.

Couldn't be better.

Look Harold, I don't
know what's gotten into you,

but I did not come down here
to watch you watch cock fights

and play craps.

Now your partner thinks...

My partner thinks,

Morty thinks,

it's I who makes the money
so that Morty can think

and have me pestered on my vacation.

Seven, the loser.

Take a line.

Loser is seven.

All right, all right, all right.

Come on.

I got some briefs up in the room.

Look 'em over and then we'll talk.

Fine.

Now really Harold, you've got to
pay more attention to the law.

Martin, I'll give you
odds if you follow every law

in the book, you'll be
broke or dead in a week.

You look paler than you did last year.

You worry too much Martin.

With clients like you, how can I help it?

How's your golf?

You know how it is
Harold, I'm getting older.

You are aging.

Ev'll give you the briefs.

Well where are you going?

I got to win my money back.

(doorbell ringing) (bright music)

Come in.

Hi.

I uh, see you changed your dress.

Mm hm.

Join me won't you?

I'd like to but I uh, have
to pick up Harold's briefs.

Martin, how do you like your work?

In fact, how do you like your life?

I like it Mrs. Gern.

Which, your work or your life?

Both.

Is there a difference?

I think so.

Harold doesn't.

Mrs. Gern I, uh,

could you tell me where
Harold has those briefs?

I think I have a captive audience.

Did anybody ever tell you look like a Martin?

That's nice to know.

More and more you look like a Martin.

(horn honking)

It's a long way down from there.

You're not much of a gambler are you?

I think you could make
anyone look conservative

if you wanted to Mrs. Gern.

I think I'm gonna get morbid.

Point of fact, I think I have a death wish.

And point of fact, you'll get your wish

unless you come down from there.

We are not amused.

Watch the wine.

If I'd done that I wouldn't be here now.

Don't you think you've gone far enough?

Nonsense.

There isn't enough.

I've so little to say
and nobody who'll listen.

Harold God bless him, has
a pretty selective ear.

Please understand, this isn't
my usual manner of meeting.

I understand.

Really.

Thank you Mrs. Gern.

Evelyn.

Evelyn.

-How are you feeling this morning sunshine?
-All right.

Ah, don't be an old grouch.

What could be better than mixing
a little pleasure with business, uh?

Ev, don't you be an old grouch.

I'll tell you what, we'll take a
little morning cruise, a little morning dip,

a little breakfast, and business.
More or less in that order.

Did you look over those briefs?

-Harold of course I looked over those briefs.
-Well? Am I innocent or am I guilty?

Of course you're not guilty Harold.
That's not the point.

I mean, you may have stretched the law
a little bit, but you're not guilty.

Besides, even if you were, you
know you'd never go to jail,

as long as you keep your money.

Martin, you don't understand.

I like making money.

Harold how about a swim?

Good.

-Martin?
-No thanks Harold.

Oh come on, I insist.

Wash some of the meanness out of you.

Besides, I've got some diving equipment
you ought to try out.

Manuel, we'll stop here.

Come on Martin, let's go. We'll change.

(soft music)

(suspenseful music)

(claw snapping)

Martin I'm sorry. I didn't mean to.

There was a manta ray behind you.

You hurt bad?

Not too.

Harold!

Harold!

Oh Oh, looks like I'll
have to carry both of you.

-Mayday!
-Something's wrong.

Put your mask back on.

Maybe we come up too fast or something.

Leave it on till we get back to the ship.

Manuel, give us a hand.

Where is he?

(dramatic music)

Come on.

Come on Ev.

(Ev screaming)

Ev, what is it?

(ominous music)

What in the world?

Looks like he couldn't breathe.

Martin.

Martin!

There's something in the air,

if you breathe it.

How long are these tanks good for?

-An hour.
-Do you have any spares?

Get 'em, I'll try the radio.

Leave the tank on.

DF calling San Juan Harbor.

San Juan Harbor.

Harold, there's nothing.

We've got to go back to
town as soon as we can.

I'll get it started, you take care of Evelyn.

(engine sputtering)

Can't get it to fire.

Are they wet?

(engine sputtering)

I don't think I'll get it started.

Let's take the spare tanks and row to shore.

We're not too far from town.

Then we'll figure out what to do there.

(waves crashing)

(bright music)

Why do they keep on playing
the same record on that thing?

Why don't they at least
advertise or something?

How much time we got left on these tanks?

20 minutes.

We'll never make it to town
by then, not by the beach.

Let's cut straight through
the jungle and try it.

At least we'll satisfy our curiosity.

Harold, please shut that thing off.

I can't, if anything comes through,
we've got to hear it.

Harold, we've got to
take these things off now.

-Martin, if we do...
-It doesn't matter they're empty.

The hell with it!

Ev.

Come on hon.

Well,

bad sign.

(tense music)

Harold.

Harold, what are you doing?

Harold.

Harold.

What is it?

Martin, answer me.

Martin, answer me.

Martin will you stop sniffling
the flowers and answer me?

There's air Harold.

Well of course there's air.

No, not of course.

The match wouldn't light, now it would.

Something took the oxygen out
of the air and now it's back.

But why Martin?

-Why now?
-Green leaves.

Green leaves.

This stuff gives off oxygen.

(Harold laughing)

(all laughing)

(soft music)

What's wrong?

I'm a little dizzy, I guess
there's still not much air.

Martin what about the town?

I guess we better take a walk over there

and see how bad things really are.

It seems quiet.

Let's take it slow.

If we're not careful,
we could pass out again.

OK, let's go.

(foreboding music)

Let's take this one
and go back to the hotel.

Come on Ev.

No, I won't move.

I won't move, not if I have to see anymore.

-Ev, Ev.
-I won't move.

Ev, come on.

I won't, Harold.

(bright music)

(door clattering)

Operator?

Operator?

Operator?

There's nothing.

We've got to do something, Martin.

I've got to have a drink.

Nobody'll be drinking
in here for a long time.

-Scotch?
-Please.

(ice clattering)

Martin what happened?

Bigger and better bomb, act of God,

what difference does it make?

The result's the same.

Harold take it easy.

What for?

I don't know.

I really don't know.

Martin we've got to do something.

Maybe we can go back to New York.

And see seven million bodies
stinking up the streets?

No thanks.

It isn't everywhere.

Harold there was nothing on the radio

and nothing on the phone.

Now we should have heard
something from somewhere.

And you can bet that whatever happened,

we didn't get the worst of it.

Shall we stay here?

You've got somewhere to go?

Now listen Martin, I don't like the idea

of being in a world of dead
bodies anymore than you do.

We can't stay here.

In a couple of days, the
stench alone would choke us.

Hey Morty,

he's got a house on the tip of the island.

Let's get going, I don't like it here.

(soft music)

(engine humming)

(dramatic music)

Martin, bring a hammer and chisel.

Your wish is my command.

Must we break in?

Give me.

(hammer banging)

Probably best if we just sleep tonight,

talk about it tomorrow.

Martin there's a bedroom
off the study you can use.

Oh, Mrs. Gern?

Thank you.

Goodnight.

(tense music)

Testing, testing, testing, testing,

-testing, testing.
-Martin.

Yes?

Martin, meet me in the
study as soon as you can.

Martin, can you hear me?

Yes.

What hit you?

The end of the world Mr. Gern.

Now listen Martin,

I think we ought to get together and agree

that we should keep that
kind of talk to a minimum.

That isn't just talk.

Look Martin, the reason
why I called you up here

is because I think we ought to decide
just exactly what we're gonna do.

Harold, there's probably
enough canned food here

to last years.

And if we should run out,

we can always hold our noses

and drive back to town for more.

You're not making it any easier.

Could it be much easier?

The lush island of Puerto Rico,

a lush villa, and a whole life
to be nothing but a lush in.

Morning.

May I come in?

(soft music)

The lighter works.

Isn't that marvelous?

Anybody here know how to roll their own?

Evelyn, don't you think you
ought to finish dressing?

Why? Expecting company?

Martin is here.

So he is.

How are all your family
and friends Mr. Joyce?

Delighted you dropped by.

How would you like me to
dress for the occasion?

Evening dress?

House dress?... Slip!

He's gonna be here one hell
of a long time Harold.

All right.

We're in a rotten situation,
an unprecedented one,

but I'm not gonna fall apart

and neither is anyone else
as long as I can help it.

Look you don't build all at once.

I didn't make my money in one day.

You lost it in 20 minutes.

Now, we're gonna work out a plan

and we're gonna take it step by step.

If you take things as they come,

if you do them step by step,

we're gonna be all right.

Evelyn, how about breakfast?

I'll change first.

Evelyn,

Martin come here.

What?

We have company.

Another house guest?

Where can we possibly put him?

The problem is where did he come from?

He should be dead.

He could have hatched from an egg.

They can probably live longer on less oxygen

than we can anyway.

It doesn't look good.

There's gonna be a lot
of decay on the island.

These things are gonna thrive,

ants, mosquitoes, tropical disease.

Sooner or later, we may have to leave.

Won't it be the same wherever we go?

There's always the Arctic.

We may do just that, go north.

Don't you think it's a
little impulsive to go north

because we may have an insect problem?

Now look Martin, I don't mean tomorrow

and I don't mean the North
Pole, what I might mean,

well, say northern Canada.

Now to do this, we're gonna
have learn how to navigate.

And to be self-sufficient,

we're gonna have to learn how to fish.

Right?

Right.

Not only would we get rid of the insects,

but things like disease
and food preservation

be a lot less a problem.

Most of all, we might find people.

After all the three of us got by here.

More people died there, more
people might have lived.

Right?

Right.

You know I'm right.

(dramatic music)

(light music)

(birds chirping)

Mirror mirror on the wall,

who is the fairest of us all?

Fish.

Maybe we'll have salmon up north,

like the kind on beer ads.

Who knows?

We're not leaving just yet.

-Why?
-Weather's bad.

I don't want to take
any unnecessary chances.

Harold it rains down here quite a bit.

I know.

But this is the worst of it.

Besides, you don't and I don't
know enough about sailing

to get by in a storm.

And without stars, we're dead.

What kind of stars?

The ones in the sky or the
ones in your astrology chart?

-Martin.
-Ev,

I want to talk to Martin.

So talk.

Alone.

Business?

Or is this something just
between you two fellas?

We'll talk about this later.

Now look Martin, I realize
we have problems here.

Three of them.

Yeah, and we never did they
get that fourth for bridge.

And we won't staying here.

Look Harold, the sooner we
leave, the better for all of us.

All right Martin.

It's a tough situation,

but we're not leaving this
island until we're ready.

Now, until then

we've got to force ourselves into a pattern,

keep working until we go north.

Martin the need to work is inborn.

It's the only thing that
will save our sanity.

Harold, I'm not sure I
feel any inborn need to work.

Now maybe there's something wrong with me.

I don't think so.

And there's one other
thing I'd like to bring up,

this business about Evelyn.

What business?

This one woman, two men situation.

I really don't know what to say.

I guess we'll just have to live with it.

You mean I'll have to live with it.

I don't see any other alternative.

Where are you going?

To Evelyn.

And so, to bed.

We are married you know.

So it's legal huh?

Harold look your marriage certificate

means about as much here as your money.

That certificate is only paper.

My marriage isn't.

(somber music)

(door closing)

Harold, please don't.

That won't solve anything.

What's there to solve?

You really don't see do you?

Harold in the last world,
you didn't give me a chance

to find out where I belonged.

You're not doing it in this world either.

I'll tell you where you belong.

You're my wife Evelyn.

Harold please.

You're my wife.

(Soft Music)

I'm going fishing, I'll be back.

What's new?

Not much.

Why aren't you fishing?

I don't know. When you see one fish,
you've uh, seen'em all.

Where are you going?

Beach.

Care to come along?

Why not?

How does the rest of it go?

Beware the Jabberwock my son.

The jaws that bite, the claws that catch.

[Both] Beware the Jubjub bird

and shun the frumious Bandersnatch.

(laughing) It's fun.

I wish Harold could...

Where will you be
ten years from this second?

Running over ice blocks,
chasing little Gerns,

living in a guest igloo, I don't know.

Will you be alive 10 years from now?

I don't know!

How could I?

I don't want to believe that.

Well you didn't want to believe
the world would end either.

You don't want to now.

Well it's what I feel.

I felt it end.

And I'm married to somebody who doesn't
insist upon my thinking about it.

Or thinking. Period.

It's marvelous.

You think.

You are the thinkingest man.

Is that supposed to make me feel bad?

And you ask questions.

Questions, questions, questions.

I think I'm gonna erase you.

I'm gonna take my big toe and wipe you out.

Dare me.

Double dare me.

Seems I remember doing this before,

only then I didn't have so far to fall.

(tense music)

Where are you now Martin?

There.

There.

(Martin grunting)

If you hold 'em down it'll help.

(soft music)

Come out of the sun.

You make a nice martini.

Naturally.

I was taught all of the do's
and don'ts of gracious living.

Tell me about your day.

Oh, lunch at 21.

Shopping at Saks.

The most awful sales lady at Saks.

She made me want to complain
about everybody

who had ever sold me anything.

Those sales ladies at Saks
will do it to you every time.

(waves crashing)

Where would you like to dine?

Before the theater?

Of course not.

I meant afterwards.

Oh.

Well, you remember that funny
little French restaurant

over on 8th Avenue, you know the one.

I do.

I can't think of its name off hand,
but I do.

It really is there.

Then we'll go there.

It really is there.

Can't you tell me the name of it?

-Ev.
-Can't you tell me

-the name of it?
-Ev, don't.

(Ev crying)

(ominous music)

Start sorting, then we'll
take another crack at it.

I no longer see the reason for catching fish

we'll never be able to eat.

All right Martin.

What do you want to do?

To look at many things. Not just fish.

What the matter Martin?

You afraid if you look at a fish too long
you'll begin to look like one?

Maybe Harold, maybe that's
exactly what I'm afraid of.

Boy oh boy,

it's certainly a good thing
the world ended when it did.

Cause you never would have made it boy,
never.

Made what Harold?

A millionaire?

Money?

Money and fish, fish and money.

Harold if rotten money smelled like
rotten fish,

they'd have given you a bank to yourself.

Yes sir Mr. Gern, the way
you made your money stank.

The way you catch fish, stinks.

And furthermore Harold, you stink!

(dramatic music)

Ha-Ha.

(water splashing)

This is no game no more boy.

It's always a game Harold.

How was Evelyn?

Nice?

Not bad.

But why not find out for yourself?

(suspenseful music)

(punch landing)

That got to you didn't it?

Didn't it?

Come on let's see you laugh now.

You're always mocking all the time,
mock now.

You don't understand the meaning of decency.

You laughed at it.

Go on, laugh.

You think living is stupid?

Well why don't you try dying a little?

You're leaving.

You think that's funny?

You'll be out of here in two hours.

Where to?

Take your choice.

You mean you'd exile one
third of the human race?

I'd do better than that and I can.

But you know why you couldn't Martin?

Because you don't have it
in you to find a reason.

Not yet.

So he's leaving,

and not just because of what he did to you.

Did to me!

Harold, Martin didn't rape me.

That's enough.

I don't want to hear about it.

It's not just because of that.

We had a balance here, we had a system.

And he loused it up.

Harold I know you're hurt,

but it never was his system or mine.

Hurt?

To begin with, when we first got here

I asked for suggestions.

Neither of you had anything
but smart remarks.

Well somebody's got to take
the responsibility somewhere.

Sure, you had a system and we had none,

but we needed our own Harold, not yours.

But you never had anything.

Never Ev, not when I met you.

And not when I married you.

Your system never really
worked for me Harold.

With or without the world,
your system's the same.

It gives me everything but you.

Your money is gone and
what it meant is gone.

And you've never really seen that.

It meant me.

And I'm not gone.

And you never really saw that.

I made that money it didn't make me.

And what it took to make, I've still got.

Then use it.

Use it to help.

That's what I want to do.

That's what I'm trying to do.

And Martin?

I'll help us by getting rid of him.

Harold, Martin is part of us.

-I'm married to you not to Martin...
-The hell with him.

(somber music)

Where are you going?

Out.

What'll you do?

Nothing.

What's that?

A little headache.

Do you mind going alone?

No more than I mind going.

Would you mind company?

I won't stop you.

Ask me though Martin.

I need you to ask me.

Look, Ev, I may not have
much love for that man,

but I couldn't do that to him.

What?

Leave him alone.

Martin, he wanted you alone.

I don't think he realizes what that means.

Martin.

All right Ev, I do want you with me.

(soft music)

We'll run around the world together.

We'll take that yacht and set sail, OK?

Really?

Really.

What'll I need?

It's a come as you are party.

Evelyn?

Evelyn?

What's taking so long?

Packing.

You see Evelyn?

Yes.

Where?

Here.

Where is she now?

She left.

How's your eye?

It still works.

Well when you're ready,

I'll be down by the garage to see you off.

Is that all you're taking?

That's all.

After all Harold, I'm not
the kind of house guest

to run off with the silverware.

Now just don't get any
ideas about that boat.

It belongs to Ev too.

Doesn't 1/3 of it belong to me?

Yeah, but 2/3 belongs to us.

I defer to your unimpeachable
sense of ethics.

Now listen Martin, I don't
have to let you take this car.

I know Harold, I know.

Where are you going to?

That's one decision you won't have to make.

Just give me the keys.

(light music)

(engine revving)

Evelyn.

Evelyn if you go away
I won't come after you.

I won't come.

Evelyn

I won't come after you.

(engine revving)

Will he follow us?

Soon as he can start the truck.

What if he catches us?

I mean Harold can be awfully brutal

when he thinks he's been wronged.

People who believe in wrong and
right can be.

What do you believe in Martin?

Nothing Ev.

I'm too civilized.

Are you cold?

A little.

How much longer?

At this rate, an hour.

Have you ever handled a boat before?

I mean, how will we?

All we can do is follow the islands

until we hit what I hope
will be the Florida Keys.

From there we can go right up the coast.

Does it hurt?

Sort of, it feels like something

rolling around in back of my eye.

Martin.

(tires screeching)

(car crashing) (dramatic music)

You all right Ev?

-Yes, you?
-Yeah.

That looked like it was a body.

(suspenseful music)

Ev, this wheel is bent sideways.

We're gonna have to walk.

Can we make it in time?

Well the harbor's on the
other side of this forest.

We could cut our time in half.

Ev we better cut through here.

Ev wait here.

No.

I'm gonna check and see if it's all right.

Take me with you Martin.

-I don't want to be alone.
-Come on Ev, wait here.

I'll meet you at the church, OK?

Don't.

Don't.

Martin, what if we were to have a child?

I mean wouldn't it be nice
if we were to have a child?

Whatever for?

What for?

Ev look, it's all over but the shouting

as far as the human race goes.

And there's no more
reason for little Evelyns

and little Martins running
on those ice blocks

than little Gerns.

All that's left for us is to live without pain.

I'll be right back.

(tense music)

(soft music)

(dramatic music)

You're not taking my boat.

You forget it's only 1/3 your boat.

Where's Evelyn?

She doesn't want to see you.

She is my wife. Where is she?

You never learn do you Harold?

Your boat, your money,
your wife, your world.

Nothing belongs to you Harold, nothing.

Where is she Martin?

No.

(Martin grunting) (suspenseful music)

Leave me alone.

(punches landing)

(water splashing)

(engine revving) (dramatic music)

(suspenseful music)

Where is she Martin?

Ev?

Martin?

Where are you Ev, I can not see.

I'm here.

(door closing)

Come down from that altar.

What altar Harold?

Come down from there.

I don't see any church.

What's the matter Harold?

Are you afraid that the
biggest banker of all

wouldn't approve?

There are no more bankers, no more churches,

and no more God.

No more pencils, no more books,

no more teacher's dirty looks.

Pretty silly to stick
around and look after you.

I mean Harold, you can take
care of things all by yourself.

You can run the world all by
yourself, can't you Harold?

Ev?

I'm here.

What can I do Martin?

My eyes are dim, I cannot see.

I have not brought my specs with me.

My eye hurts.

(tense music)

I killed him.

Will we never learn?

He didn't think so.

Let's go home.

Where is that?

Help me find out.

(dramatic music)