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Original subtitles

This programme contains strong language from the beginning and throughout.

Last time, the family hit Thailand.

What Kyle's dad do, which was a proper belter.

Chantelle pied off Ricky.

I generally love you as a friend.

You know, it is what it is. And James proposed to Leah.

Will you marry us?

But although our stories had it easy... It didn't take long for things to go

west. All you do is strut about and grunt.

Fucking hell. We were getting horrendously trolled, Sophie. I thought

start speaking in that instant.

Jesus Christ!

Those words did not make you come out of my mouth!

This house is always going to have a cash of personality.

She's saying I'm lying. I'm not lying about a mouse.

Are you for real? Yes, I'm for real.

I'm for real, son.

This time, Europe calls.

Let's see if Jordan's out here!

And the family are reuniting in Lisbon for the mother of all city break.

I think you'd get a fucking hell of a reception. Touch him, Chloe!

Take it off!

As Geordie Shore celebrated 15 year anniversary.

The only pain I want to be in is champagne.

Pray to fucking beauty.

I hope people get more shots.

We all keep growing up.

Thank you, I love you.

We've always had each other's backs.

With mother.

Oh, my God.

And marriages.

And a long -awaited surprise arrival.

Here we go again.

Welcome to Lisbon, man.

The sun is definitely not shining. We're in Lisbon to celebrate Chloe Ferry's

big 3 -0. And I want to show her exactly how much she means to me. I've booked a

gorgeous villa.

got loads of surprises and invited all the Geordies, some of which are already

in Lisbon making their own way to the villa.

Nathan, it's freezing.

Listen, don't start complaining now, right? Because I'm not having that. Oh,

you've got a lot of complaining.

Are you worse because you're pregnant?

Yeah. I can't be half.

Since Thailand, things have obviously changed.

I am pregnant again.

I have missed way too many huge life experiences being pregnant.

I am not going to miss Chloe's birthday.

I'm going to need a lot of help, a lot of muscle.

Appreciate this.

You're travelling yourself because of me.

I've organised this. I would help, but you don't want us to go into labour,

because imagine that.

Man, if your water's broken out, I'd be fucked.

I'd have to look at your vagina and be like, oh, what have you got in there,

your kids?

Oh, God.

I'm not going to wait. I don't need any help. I've been going to the gym for six

months. I'm just so excited to be in Lisbon and to be weighted on hand and

There we go.

Got it. Right, you get in.

Thank you so much for helping me close the boot.

Yep.

Comfortable. Thank you.

Thank you so much for that help there.

I will do, mate.

Good, man. Thanks very much. Thank you.

Since the last time you saw me, I've had another two children.

So I'm now a father of three boys. It's just literally the best feeling in the

world. Better than any fight. Better than sex.

I'm their everything and they're my everything.

Typical you.

Always, always late.

Hurry up.

E -A -P -E -A -P -G -O -A -P. My life is completely different now. One, I live

in Leeds. I'm a father of two kids.

I play a lot of golf.

There he is. Look at this review.

How's it going? How's it going?

How is it?

God. When I come back to Newcastle, I always patch up with mate. It's always

nice to see Aaron.

Can I have a latte, please? Not too hot.

Apart from, I normally change the Jager bombs to a latte now.

Mate, can I just ask for one second, right? What went through your head to

bare -knuckle fighting? I'm not boxing.

I'm bare -knuckle. Do you know what it is? Obviously, the last 12, 18 months

wasn't ideal.

I wasn't really doing much, and then they reached out with a three -fight

contract, and I was like, why not? If one of my kids said they were going to

or do a bare -knuckle, they've got absolutely no chance.

I fight so they don't have to.

You just play golf, and then no -one punches you facing.

You just go on the golf course.

hit the ball, walk after it, and hit it again.

Looking back, if you went right through it, who's going to be one of the last

people to settle down? I'd be like... Because you used to say... Everyone

settle down. I would have said me.

Thanks. I'm not happy with a slightly different life.

Well, cheers, mate.

Gaz used to always say to me, I'm Jodie Shaw, I'm not leaving, I'll never leave.

But obviously, as we know, life takes over.

Children, they come first. There's someone saying now, you said to me, we

out and have a few drinks.

Or... You can go home and cut the grass. I would hop on that tractor and I would

cut the grass with the biggest smile on my face. And it got to the point where

I'm more excited to cut the grass than to even think about a night out.

Different things make me happy now. Like, I used to think, I can't wait to

out. And now I've got so much else in my life now and people to look after and

responsibilities. Just total different lifetimes for me. That's what it feels

like. So I've heard on the grapevine that you're going back because Chloe's

having her birthday in Horses Club.

Yeah, I've been invited.

And then they were, try and get Gaz. Because they said, if anyone can get

it's going to be me. Me and Gaz are best mates. Put it this way, if it wasn't

for Gaz, I wouldn't be sitting here right now.

He was a massive part in me coming on to Jodie's show. I was working on the oil

rigs. He was like, Aaron, just come.

That was 12 years ago.

If I'm here, there's a very, very good chance that he'll come back.

I'm not going. Listen,

Jodie's show was a massive part of the life, wasn't it? So I just think it

be nice to go back and just see how everyone is. Do you know what I mean?

obviously been invited back before. It just never felt right.

I was just busy with life.

I watched from afar, but I just never really fancied it. The reason I left was

Chloe bounced in. She was like, I've been watching you since I've been in

school. I was like, yep.

I'm off me. When Chloe come in, you're not going to believe this, when Chloe

come in, her first words were, wow, I'm in the Jolie Show house, and she asked

us for a selfie.

She did.

She didn't realize she was part of Jolie Show, she actually thought she was a

fan. And that's when I left, I thought, I'm too old to be in here.

Give me the high heel, the high, high heel.

Since Thailand, I've been doing a lot of work on myself.

I started by reversing my baby elf and loads of cosmetic procedures. I was

tarnished about the way I looked.

And now that I've started to, like, basically erase them, I feel like I'm

starting to get, like, the old Chloe Ferry back, and that's exactly what I

Another day, another sleep. Why not?

Apart from one thing. What?

Honestly, not keen on them boots.

Why? I don't know. There's just something not right about them. It's

I'm not going to take fashion advice from you. Can you not change them?

terrible.

It's very rude.

I'm just days away from turning 30, and to celebrate Nathan's for me, a massive

30th birthday.

It's somewhere like Lesbian Lisboa, somewhere in Portugal.

Anyway, I want to end my 20s like it started, getting absolutely mortal with

Geordie family.

I've been with all the Geordies, like, throughout my full 20s.

Can you believe that? I can remember, clear as day, you walking into the

Shore house. Geordie Shore house, I know.

And with my red hair and that dress, it was only 40 quid, and I was like, oh, my

God, I can't believe I spent 40 quid on a dress. The 40 pound was a lot of money

for us.

I thought, what is my life turning into? The Chloe Ferry that walked into that

house at 19 years old was absolutely nuts.

Hello! What the fuck?

Oh, my God!

It's mad how much I've been through with Nathan soaking on it. It's seen us grow

so much.

So I feel that I couldn't ask for a better birthday to spend it with them

people. Yeah.

I'm so happy that Nathan has took the lead for me 30th birthday because he

us the best out of everyone.

And not only that, it's good that he's took over because then he's paying.

Right, so, because obviously I'm going away, I have got you a few house rules.

Come on then. So rule number one, do not put the heating on without my

permission if you get a little bit cold.

You've got three hot water bottles there. There's no excuse.

Well, I was wondering what these were all about.

I don't want to keep going too stingy. And then the second rule, when I go and

do my shopping, I get the toilet roll. That's the cheapest one. It's rubbish.

I don't care.

No buying the expensive toilet paper. That's the only rules that I have for

If I've got rules like that, I'll not be coming.

Really? No.

When I first went on Tony's show, I was living in a box room at my ma's house.

But now she's living in my house and listening to my rules. I love it,

will be watching you on the ring doorbell, dear squirrel.

I'll see you when I'm 30. Right.

Dirty. Dirty and thriving.

Are we ever dirty?

Do you know what that means? No idea.

Goodbye. Bye.

Woo!

Come on, Portugal.

Heating's going on.

The airport, please.

Sexy. Highest temperature yet.

Last time, when me and James were in Thailand, we fell out in a big way over

argument that me and his girlfriend Leah had.

I genuinely thought things were squashed over in Thailand, but since coming

back, he spoke shit about me in the press, which made things blow up again.

Jay, brother, how you doing?

It's nice, it's beautiful. Mate, look at that scenery behind us. Look at that.

Nearly as nice as them teeth.

Shut up.

You're going to be lying to me.

You dick.

You shit yourself there.

Good lad. Miss you, mate. You know I miss you every day when I speak to you.

I'm going to buy so far away, I thought I'd come to the UK to see my mam before

flying to Lisbon.

Obviously, I know we're coming out first, so it's 30. It's going to be good

see a lot of people, but...

There's been a lot of things said and there's been a lot of things happened

he's sorting.

James is going out of his way to try and make me look bad.

I'm going to love you and leave you, but we'll get into this fully

loaded when you land. And on that note, can't wait for you to get over.

Bring some hairspray for us, will you?

Might run out.

I love Jodie Shaw. Yeah. If I was there, I don't know what I'd be doing. Still

arguing.

Old me, if someone argued with me, the old me would be like, jump off, being

like, that is so far gone now. Like, if someone did have anything to say, I'd be

like, look, mate, calm down.

Yeah. When you're calm, I'll happily sit and talk to you.

There is a little bit of beef going on at the minute, from what I've seen.

Ricky and James, you might have seen it on social media, Ricky was voicing at me

on Instagram going, oh, he's a fucking two -faced man. I was like, oh, Jesus.

That's what I mean.

I'm not going to sit and watch people bicker about someone necking on with

someone or someone said this. I have moved on so far from that. I don't even

recognise that guy anymore. I was 22, 23 when I walked into Geordie Shore.

I had not a care in the world.

I literally had one goal, that was to get smashed pot as much as I could.

Gary, I feel like, I know I'm talking about us in two people, but for me,

what it feels like.

I never thought I'd grow, but I feel like I have, and it's weird.

Do you think they're mad seeing Marnie, or not?

Nah. Like, to be honest, I'm excited to see her. I haven't had a catch -up with

her. Yeah, she's like one of the lads.

I'm buzzing to see Marnie.

Here's the relationship out of it, in the arguments that we had.

Me and Marnie were best mates.

for fucking nearly ten years.

I don't see why we can't be friends because we had so many good times

on the show, so I think it would be a shame if we can't be friends.

Well, mate, I've got you here, so what are you thinking? I would love to have

you there.

Are you coming, yes or no?

I honestly don't know if I can.

Where I am in my life right now, I'm pretty content and I don't want to mess

things up, so I don't know if I can.

But look...

You go, have a good time, ring us, and just let us know what it's like.

Right, you better get to the airport.

Right, good, man. Nice to see you, Rhys. See you later.

I might see you later.

Can't guarantee that.

Oh, my God, this is heavy.

At least it's sunny.

Abby, where are we?

I've not a clue, but it's very beautiful.

Right, I mean, it's a picturesque. Yeah. Ooh.

Do you think we should just sit here?

Yeah. And have a little rest?

Yeah, I'm exhausted.

Cheers to Lisbon.

Cheers to Lisbon. I don't know if I've ever been to Lisbon before, you know. I

have. Since we went on holiday in Thailand, I have just been so busy with

career and being a mum. I have barely seen anyone, so it's so good to come out

to this beautiful city and catch up with my friends like Abby. I can't believe

you're loved up now.

I know.

How do you feel?

I feel like the happiest I've ever been.

Last time round, I was single, but now, a year later, I've got a boyfriend and I

couldn't be happier.

My boyfriend, Jack, is only Jordan's stepbrother.

When Jack came around, it was just so different to anything that I've ever

experienced and he just made us feel, like, so special and that I was the only

one.

Do you feel like you want to burst into tears all the time because you're so

happy? I'll just look at him and then I'll cry.

I'm just so happy.

It's weird because when I look back at, like, last year and how I was and I was

going through a little bit of a bad time and then, yeah, it's just mad how

things can change.

I find it, like, emotional to talk about, but, like, in a good way.

And I've always looked at everyone else around me, like, in happy relationships

and I honestly thought that that would never be me and I never thought I would

meet someone.

When I look back, my life is just completely different for the better.

That phrase when people say, when you know, you know.

Do you feel like that? Yeah.

I'm so happy for you, though, honestly.

Seems like such a nice life. It is.

How is mum life?

Mum life is...

Better than it was when we were in Thailand.

It takes a while for you to just adjust from being, like, a normal human who's

only responsible for themselves to being a parent.

But now I've adjusted, I'm like, I feel like I could actually have another one.

Really? Yeah. Me and Jacob are actually trying for another baby, and I do feel

so bad for Sophie because I know how difficult it's been for her and Jordan

get pregnant.

I was speaking to Sophie, obviously, about trying to get pregnant because I

want to mention it to her that I was trying because it must just be so hard

you see it. everybody else around you get pregnant but yeah i do hope she

out though i've spoken to sophie and her priority at the moment is having a baby

and she doesn't want anything to get in the way of that so she's not coming to

lisbon let's go and see the villa are you drunk already

Hello. Doing a bit of work, are you?

Ah, you think so? This is for me.

Do you want a drink?

Yeah.

Oh, is that what vodka is?

That beats you back in the day.

It's like a blue trout.

It is? There you go.

So what's been going on in my life recently?

I've still got the estate agents.

I've bought an Italian restaurant in Newcastle.

I've bought a big renovation project for a house for me and my family.

Oh! And I'm getting married in a few weeks.

And to top it all off, Miss Christy wants a lover baby.

I actually can't believe, like, how soon the wedding's coming around. Like, the

stress is, like, starting to get to me now. But the fact that we've got to go

Lisbon, like, in between that, I don't know how you feel, but... I don't know,

get it. Do you think everyone that came to Thailand is expecting to come to the

wedding? I think most likely, yes. But, I mean, originally I did invite Ricky

and Jay, but...

After the way Ricky's gone on with James, I've never had James feeling

uncomfortable. No, and that's what it's about, isn't it? When he's such a big

part of the wedding.

The way Ricky's treat James, I think it's bang out of order.

My issue with Ricky is, he said to James online, I'm going to make your life a

living hell in here. I don't agree with anyone saying that. Like, even if James

said that to someone, no, that's not on. We don't do that.

I feel so bad that James and Leah might not be coming to Lisbon.

I think it's really unfair if they don't come because of...

Ricky, like, he's the one who caused all of this drama.

I've invited James and Leah over to convince them to come to Chloe's 30th

ignore Ricky's bullshit.

I would love James and Leah to be there, you know. I know. And they're there to

celebrate Chloe as well.

Well, we'll do our best.

Yeah.

I'm on top of the world.

I think we're here.

We've just pulled up to the villa that I've booked for Chloe's birthday, and I

won't lie, I'm a bit nervous.

I hope it's as nice as it is on the website.

Marty, get back in the car.

Do you think I'm paying him all this bloody money for now? You know, he can

the bloody door at least.

I've got all the bloody cases out.

Thank you very much.

There you go. Thank you. Wow. Bye -bye, thank you.

This looks amazing.

Listen, I've pulled out all the stops.

Now this is a bit of me.

Hang on, you've got to wait. Nathan, look at the size of the door.

It's for my ego.

Whoa! This is bigger than what it looked like on the photo. Oh, my God, this is

insane.

It smells brand new, doesn't it?

Oh, God, Nathan, this is beautiful.

Marnie, fucking look at that kitchen there.

You know, I don't think I've ever been in a villa like this before. You have

said surprisingly well.

Surprisingly well? The cheeky bitch.

When has Marnie ever organised anything as amazing as this?

Oh, my God. The garden's so pretty.

God. Love it.

Shall we look inside?

Yeah, let's do it. I'm literally going to piss myself.

Please don't. It's expensive.

I'm not cleaning it.

This pregnancy was a massive surprise. It wasn't planned.

So to find out that I was carrying a little girl was amazing.

Seven and a half months.

So I'm really far, but this pregnancy's been really tough.

So different to the boys.

I've been sick, sore boobs, like any type of symptom I've had.

Not going to lie, decor in here, don't really like it. The orange is

It's really screaming at me with a hangover that's going to hurt. But

Imagine morning chats in here, catching up. Oh, sun!

The sun, look at that.

You couldn't time me. I instantly feel better.

This time I'm just winning. I've got my own room, got my own bathroom, got my

own space.

I feel like...

Got your print there?

There's a moment to do.

Health, wealth, happiness, and Chloe's 30th. Yep.

Let it be a good one.

No drama.

Whoa.

I know I keep saying it, but I'm so proud of you for this. This is literally

heaven. You wait till you see your birthday pie.

I hope that I can still, like, part of the pair.

The things I've got planned, everyone can get involved in, pregnant or not.

OK. What are you holding your belly like that for?

She's constantly ticking.

Can I feel?

Mm -hm.

Oh, I just got a stag shock!

God, she's electric.

Is that her?

God, she's a kicker, isn't she?

Can you feel it, the movement?

What's that feel? Does it feel like butterflies?

Yeah, it's like, it's uncomfortable.

I'd love to be pregnant for a little bit. Would you?

Just to feel it. You would not last a day being pregnant. I think I would. Let

me just tell you, no man would.

I would.

No. I've got very high pain threshold.

I'm covered in tattoos, not once had numbing cream. I take it off the bum.

That's painful.

I'm really excited. I'm just excited to see everyone.

Yeah. I think I did a really good job last time seeing out the drama.

Do you?

Well, do you not?

You and Sophie had a big argument. Oh, shit, yeah, but apart from that, me and

Sophie are in a good place now, though. We speak mostly every day.

Me and Sophie went through a really bad patch last year. Before Thailand, I

didn't think we'd ever get back to having a good relationship, but Thailand

really did help us, and since then, me and her have managed to fix our

relationship more closely than ever.

What are we going to do if there is a divide?

I don't think there'll be as much of a divide this time.

Yeah. The only thing I can think that would cause the divide this time would

obviously just be what's going on between Ricky and James.

I have invited James and Ricky.

And obviously, if they do come, they're going to bring the beef. And naturally,

I'm going to have James' back.

And Marnie is clearly going to have Ricky's because they're close.

And that could be a problem. If it does go on without luck, for the sake of

Chloe and her birthday, shut up.

That's called growth.

Are we grown now?

What's your fucking hopes? Are you having a baby?

I don't think I'm quite there yet.

I want them to fucking area off.

I've organised everything for Chloe's birthday, apart from getting her to the

villa. The person I've gave this job to, I just hope they don't fuck it up.

I probably should have thought about this, but maybe I should have got them a

lift from the airport.

You forgot about them?

Well, I just didn't think.

Well, where's Chantel?

Oh, my God!

What's happening?

Hey!

Me and Chantel have just arrived in Lisbon. And even though I've just nearly

been ran over by a truck, I'm really excited.

Darling, this is beautiful, eh? Do you know what Lisbon is?

No. Capital of Portugal.

OK. I want a drink, darling.

Where's the taxi?

Oh, there isn't a taxi.

Listen,

Lisbians... Let's be right on the tram.

Bloody hell. We can get taxis anywhere. I thought we'd get Lisbon's iconic tram.

What is this we're getting our way? Hello, Mr. Tram Driver.

Do you know I just ordered a taxi?

Has everyone forgotten that this is the big free -all?

I should be travelling in style.

At least a helicopter.

Woo -hoo!

Let's see if Jordan's out here!

Woo -hoo!

Listen,

it's so good to be here.

I'm so happy to be here for my third year. This is going to be amazing.

So, Nathan, I don't know why, but it gives me the job of making sure I do get

the villa in one piece.

I think it's absolutely mental because I'm the shittest person at directions.

Good luck, Chloe, because we're fucked.

I'm not even going to lie, Chloe, I actually don't believe you know where

going. I'm turning 30.

By the time we get to the villa, I'm going to be turning 35. Oh, how slow

is going. Oh!

Can't wait to show you me new horse. We'll be old horse.

See you soon. Bye.

Bye. Just two cinches you get as a taxi to win this wooden fucker.

I'm so excited that I've just seen Holly and Abby, and I'm so happy they've made

the effort to come for me birthday.

But I wonder who else has made it to Lisbon. So Nathan's invited everyone,

wonder who's going to come.

Mon, obviously.

Sophie, Jordan.

Aaron's been invited. Gary's been invited.

Last time I seen Gary, he tried to get back on the pole of the tricky basket.

Did he?

Oh, shit, that wasn't like me. You didn't have to fight. You left that

didn't you?

All I want to do this time, Chantel, is I want to have fun. I don't want to be

involved in any drama. Like, this is me big free oath.

I want to be the same as you. I don't want to have any drama.

The whole Abby thing I've put behind you. Yeah, yeah. Me and Abby still

spoke. I feel like I'm in a completely different place to what I was then. So I

wouldn't want to drag it on.

I feel like I've grown up loads in a year.

I've got no issue with anyone.

But, ooh, Ricky and James.

The thing is, like, I really like Ricky, I really like James, and I feel like

sometimes I am kind of in the middle, do you know what I mean? But as long as

it's not on my 30th birthday, I don't mind, cos I really don't want it to be

ruined. Like, I would feel if there was an argument, I would have Ricky's back.

Chantel would have more than Ricky's back if she'd actually give him the

He's in love with her, man.

They're a match made in heaven. Two Thomas.

Two peas in a pod.

I wish they'd just get together.

I know you always seem as a friend. You always have been, but... I think if we

make such a good couple... Do you know what?

See, when I'm 40, I'm 35 now. I'm just picking up when I'm 40. I'll get with

Ricky. I'll marry Ricky.

I know for a fine fact Ricky would love that.

He'd bite a fucking hand off that. I'm not going to lie, the lad's a fit. You

can look what you can't touch, isn't that right?

Who says you can't touch life?

I'm always super excited to come back to the Geordie Shore house, but this time

round is a little bit different because I've got a score to settle. Wow.

This is unreal.

Wow, this is insane.

On the plus side, this villa is a beautiful place to have an argument.

Yes, guys!

Oh, my God!

Hello. Fucking shit me pants then. This is insane.

You came in very quietly.

Wow. Ricky's just walked in. I'm so happy to see him. And I just know I'm

guaranteed to have a laugh when he's in the room.

You two look gorgeous.

How are you?

How are you?

You good? How are you? You good? No.

Wow, is it kicking yet? Oh my God, it's been kicking all day.

Never stop.

What's the rooms in that like?

They're nice. They're nice. Do you want us to go and show them? We'll show you

the boys' room because then you might as well carry me out of bed now. I'm

buzzing to see Nathan and Marnie here. I will tell you, Nathan has really pulled

out the bag. This villa makes the place in Coast Mui look like the Gateshead

Travel Lodge. This is the room.

It's very nice, isn't it? Very snug, isn't it?

That bed looks tiny.

They're comfier than last time. Rox's bed's bigger than that.

These are small, aren't they? They are quite small. They're tiny. I don't think

they are. These are fucking toddler beds.

Oh, dear. I'm sorry this bed's not up to the standards of Lady Simpson.

Anyway, I'm glad that Ricky's arrived here first because I want to find out

side of the beef with James.

All right, cheers, guys. Welcome to Lisbon.

Cheers. It's Portugal.

Oh, right, tell us then. What's going on?

James is doing an interview.

You know, and when you're going impressed and you're saying stuff about

isn't true.

Well, what would you be saying in the interview?

Apparently, you know, I've got reputation for, you know, not speaking

very nicely. That's not fair.

Yeah, OK. That's where I draw the line. Because obviously that's not true. It's

not true.

Even though James didn't mention me by name, anyone that watched the last

will know that's me. It's had a huge negative impact on me and my family.

My mum was at work, and when she's getting shown off girls at work... You

all the comments and shit like that.

That's what really, really pisses off.

And to be honest with you, like, for my mother to have to sit there and be

reading a lot of comments that aren't true, you know what I mean?

It takes the piss.

After the Thailand series went out, I got a load of grief online because of

James said in that interview.

I was fuming and I retaliated online, saying things like, I'm going to make

life a living hell.

Did he really think I was going to lie down and just take it?

I've not heard or seen what you posted. I heard you posted a lot.

Yeah. Have you spoke, actually, at all since?

No. No, definitely not.

Definitely not.

So if he comes here with the first time he sees you... I'm really looking

forward to seeing him.

Shit.

I'm leaving for Lisbon tomorrow, so I've invited James and Leah over for a catch

-up. Welcome in. Oh, my God. Wow.

Yeah, it's lush, isn't it?

And try get them to ignore this Ricky beef and put it behind them, because I

want them to come to Lisbon.

How did you find Thailand?

I loved it. I had quite a smooth sailing ride, apart from you, Leah.

I mean, you had the highs of the high, and you did have, obviously, some, like,

troubles there as well. Yeah, there was lots of drama, but...

Let's not let the drama override the amazing thing. No, the engagement was

literally, like, the most incredible thing ever.

You had no idea, did you? It was just so magical.

I watched it about 20 times.

Since proposing Aaliyah in Thailand, our relationship has went from strength to

strength. We've just had our engagement party, and it was absolutely

unbelievable.

But unfortunately, the beef with Ricky that I thought we'd all squashed last

year has exploded and he's been chatting loads of shite about us to the press

over something that I said promoting the show, which could have been about

anyone. We were on a press date, me, you and Chloe.

The interviewer, she went, oh, Chloe, would you ever bring your boyfriend?

Yeah. on the show and she turned around and went no because of the way one of

the cast spoke about james's partner leah so then the interviewer then turned

me and went oh what happened and i says one of the lads spoke my girlfriend not

very nicely people have put two and two together and thought well who could this

be about it can only be about one person from the way he goes on and everything

and then he's seen that somewhere and then that's When he think it's like

but all that would have took was wait until he seen me and says why did you do

this? I would go I didn't do I didn't mention you I've come to terms that I'll

never ever have a good relationship With Ricky and Ricky just wants drama.

It's all he can offer So it's all he's gonna give no one thing that got to me

the most out of everything He said was I'm gonna make your life a living hell.

It's very threatening. It's very aggressive basically he wants to Make me

bad to make themselves look better.

Me and Ricky have never really been good friends. Like, the relationships I've

got with Sophie, with Charlotte, even with Gaz, he doesn't have that

with any of them either. No.

Like, all of us, we see each other all the time. Yeah. But Ricky, Jay, Chantel,

Marnie, like, do they even see each other? Do they even speak?

I bet they've got a group chat that they talk about us in it.

The way James is speaking, it sounds like him and Leah are going to bail on

Portugal. So I need to do everything in my power to try and convince them.

Wish me luck.

So, Lisbon, then.

What are you thinking about that?

Please come.

I'm just going to beg you. I'm going to sit here outright and beg you to come.

You know what? It's a tough one because I feel like over the last few years, me

and Chloe have got a really good bond. When I first met her, I wasn't sure. I

thought she was just a bit crazy. To us, she was always the baby. She came in

the house when she was 19 years old. But now, when you get to know her, she's a

lovely girl. Yeah, we love Chloe. She was at the engagement party and Nathan's

organising something incredible for her, which is amazing to see.

And they'd want us there?

Yes. We'd want... to be there. Yeah. But it's just like, Geordie Shore and going

away with my friends has always been such a positive thing. Whereas the

of it now, going into a house where there's people that hate us and I would

to never see them again. Yeah. It's a hard one, isn't it? Like, at the minute,

don't think we'll go because I just don't think it's worth the hassle.

I do feel bad. Yeah, come on, man. Come on.

Come on.

I've been sipping soda, yeah, that's very cold.

What's her due date?

July 14th. Is that Taurus?

I'm Sam.

All my exes are Scorpios. Scorpios, they're the most toxic one, aren't they?

That's like, Scorpios are Scorpios?

Toxic.

What's going on?

Oh, sexy.

Ooh! Oh, my God.

Hello? Hello?

Wow. Hi.

Welcome home.

Oh, my God, this is unreal.

What the hell? Time to call it.

Sorry, but this is one of the best places we've ever stayed.

I don't understand why anyone is gobsmacked. I have very good taste, so I

always going to choose a nice villa.

Hi.

Lovely. How are you?

Very well.

Very well.

Look at you. How far?

Seven and a half.

Being seven and a half months pregnant is no joke. I'm surprised Marnie even

made it out here.

Where have you been?

Abi had us on the fucking metro.

What, you got the train?

The underground.

Is that why you think you're so fucking old? Oh, we've just seen Chloe and

Chantel on the tram.

Doing what?

We were literally crossing the road and they were like, from the tram.

I don't know why I was thinking I could ask Chantel to get her and Chloe from

Newcastle to the villa.

In one piece?

No one's Chantel.

They could be in Greece, Turkey, even Venice, fucking Venezuela.

You've been here a while?

We've been here all day.

What the fuck is going on with this, Fran?

We broke down.

Oh, yeah. At this point, we'll never get to Venezuela. It's going to be fucking

fuming, isn't it? Wait, then we'll get them back once they're out of our way.

What if we're getting kidnapped?

Yeah, but honestly, with me and you, we'll get given back. Let's get the two

hard work, then fucking have them back. Honestly, it's fucking a nightmare.

I mean, I don't know, we're not honestly not going to get there until three.

I feel like I've spent the full day on this tram. I'm sorry, Chantel, it's time

for me to take charge now, like.

Power. We need to get off. Sorry, I'm going to walk instead, love.

Oh, you're good. I think your bell's broke as well.

Have a good day, people.

Oh,

is it off?

Excuse me.

Hello, are you single?

What did... Oh, gee.

Come free.

Oh, very bouncy.

That one's not so bouncy.

Don't break them.

I've maxed out a few credit cards on the deposit for this place, and at this

rate, I ain't getting nothing back.

Where are you at with, like, Ricky and Chantal? I've not spoken to either of

them, to be honest, like, since off -camp. With me and Ricky, we're never

to be best friends.

I feel like there's this awkward tension between me and Ricky. It's like, I

don't know how to act and he doesn't know how to act. It's going to be hard

me to sit there if he's going to say anything, like, really bad about James

because James is one of my closest friends.

Yeah. With Chantel, I just don't know. Like, I was saying to Holly, I was like,

I'm a little bit apprehensive coming in because I don't know how she's going to

be. Well, I mean, she was happy as Larry there. I mean, she was in a tram and

she was moving, so...

Seeing Chantal on the tram smiling and waving does give us a bit of hope that

might actually get our friendship back, because the last thing I want to do is

argue again.

How far away was that where you seen them?

About 50 minutes.

50?

About to fill up.

Obviously, I'm really looking forward to seeing Chantal as well.

What is going on with you and Chantal? Have you seen each other much?

We've spoken, yeah, I saw her a few times, but... Just friends?

We'll see.

I mean, I think I've made it quite obvious that I do fancy Chantel, but

also been a really loyal friend in the times that I've really needed her,

especially when other people have been two -faced.

Oh, you'll always have a tough spot, though, won't you? Yeah, she's fit.

We'll see what happens.

Wow!

Chantel, this is better than the tram.

I can't believe how long it has actually took the spaghetti out. And I'm not

going to lie, I am dying for a beverage.

Hello, everyone!

The party is here! The bomb? I know.

Hello, how are you?

You made the bomb explode, didn't you?

Hello! You're good.

What time do you call this?

Nathan, you don't decide your times around Portugal.

I'll show you the villa. I'm taking you out for a meal, but you've got ten

minutes to get ready. Literally ten minutes. I've seen him when I'm in. How

you going to say what you mean?

No, I'm changing.

You've got ten minutes.

As much as this is Chloe's birthday, I am on a very, very, did I say very,

schedule. I'm excited about this!

So Chloe Ferrybeth, get her fucking house upstairs and make sure she looks

amazing, because tonight we are fine dining.

How nice is the villa? See outside?

Oh, it's beautiful. Unreal, come on, four years.

Wow. Are you staying like that?

I'm not going to get to it.

I literally cannot stop staring at Chantelle's body.

It gets a little bit sweeter and a little bit naughtier every single time.

I'm looking.

Fucking hell. You should see. You've been found tired all afternoon.

I know.

Oh, is she looking?

Jesus Christ.

Look, it's got big.

It's got bigger. I guess we don't know just what.

The only issue with things being hung up.

Is Chloe getting a dirty pause on all of our clothes?

Yeah, like, there was one time I just kept losing knickers. Now I think, where

are they all going? She was going in the drawer and getting them.

I used to have to bring enough knickers for me, Charlotte and Sophie, because

they'd never bring enough knickers.

I still do, to be fair.

Shida's naughty though. It's lush, isn't it? It is. Come look upstairs.

Excuse me, where's my alcohol drink?

It's getting a little bit... now. I am literally gasping for a pint of wine.

Everyone knows it is the law if the birthday girl is a mall after five

arriving. It's a waste of a party.

We don't have time to give you a treat but you've got to get ready because

going out. I've had a hell of a day with Chantel.

Well, it's not done. No, it's bummed. That's what I've been doing for the past

year.

Your bum does look good, mind. I'm not going to lie. It fucking does, doesn't

it?

Is this it?

Oh, this is actually really nice.

This is very different for us.

Normally, we're on the lash, pissing up walls, but tonight...

We're going for a nice meal, sophisticated, elegant and classy.

This is what turning 30 is all about.

Right, come on, you.

Do you want to sit at the head of the table?

Yeah, go on, I'll sit at the middle.

This is very formal, very posh for me, isn't it? Well, thank you, Nathan, it's

lovely.

Personally, I would love nothing more than spending my evening in a nice,

restaurant.

over getting wrecked in the club. But I never thought I would see the day that

Chloe Berry is celebrating her birthday in such a classy and mature way.

Get a shot or something? Yeah, a birthday shot.

Looks like I spoke too soon. So what do you want in your 30th year? What do you

want to change? Oh, I really, really, really want to have kids in the next

years. I feel like I've lived life so much now. And I just feel like in the

three years, I want to settle down.

I'm excited to see what happens to Chloe when she hits her 30s.

My 30s are completely different than my 20s. I had my son at 29, so after that,

the party went out the window.

Who's having white wine? I'll have anything, love.

That's the spirit.

After spending the full day on the tram, I'm just so happy to be at this

gorgeous restaurant.

expensive Sauvignon Blanc with my vesties. I'm so happy that you're all

because I feel like every single one of you has been through high times and low

times and I would really like to reminisce and all just come together.

That's the main thing that I want.

I'll do to that.

Cheers, everyone. Thank you so much.

Cheers.

How's your gospel pic?

Oh, my God.

Happy, everyone?

Yeah, very.

Gorgeous. Better than McDonald's. I hope so.

To be fair, I would rather be squaring a kebab from the big market, but I'm not

going to tell Nathan that.

That's not how I like mine, right? You can eat that fat.

No, I won't eat the fat. I'll eat this bit here. Nathan, eat that fat, please.

I'm not going to eat a blubber fat.

Go on, eat it.

No, I'm not an animal.

You, stop now.

Nathan, that's not going to... Come on.

Nathan.

What's it taste like?

Fat.

It's not a jolly trip without Nathan putting something vile in his mouth, but

that bit of fat is far less disgusting than the tarantula we ate in Bangkok.

Got a message.

Someone's on the way to the villa now.

What?

Hi, Nathan, I'm nearly at the villa. Where are you guys?

What? I'm going to tell them to come here. Who is it? Who is it?

Obviously, I know who it is, but I'm not telling this lot.

We're just at a restaurant round the corner.

Here's the location.

See you soon.

Oh, my God.

I was really enjoying this meal, and I'm now thinking, is James about to turn

up? Suddenly, I've got a bitter taste in my mouth.

We're out, just us, the troupe. Mm -hm, the troupe.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, we bet.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm not going to lie, I am shitting myself.

Who are you inviting?

I've invited everybody.

What do you mean, everybody?

I'm more nervous for this than I am walking out to a fight.

Oh,

my

God, hello!

This is a massive surprise.

I haven't seen Aaron in years.

Everyone is asking, is Gaz coming?

If there's a time to come back... Now is going to be the time.

I love you to pieces. I really do. I love you so much.

Come here.

Give our man. This would never have started if you didn't do that interview.

Fuck off.

Shut the fuck up. Who are you fucking staring at? Who are you fucking staring

at? Who are you fucking staring at? Are you for fucking real?

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