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Well, well, well, little sand rat.
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It looks like even on the holiest of
holiest,
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you couldn't stop thinking about me.
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I knew that you'd
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understood everything I said.
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And that you had really discovered that
deep down, everything I pointed out
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to you last time was true.
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And I knew it was a matter of time
before I found you
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begging me, pleading for
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me to let you serve me.
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But here's the thing.
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Words are only words.
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And you begging me like that doesn't
make me
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believe that you really, really want to
give up your religion.
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So how about this?
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See, now it's Ramadan.
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Denounce Allah.
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Say it out loud.
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Tell me that this holy month is a bunch
of bullshit.
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That Allah has never done anything for
you.
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That he's never proved his existence.
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That you can see, hear, and smell me.
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I'm real.
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He's not.
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Go on.
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Say it loud.
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I'm pleased.
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But that's only the first step.
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Ramadan has a few days left to go.
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And I'm about to order some changes.
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You know, next time,
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for the next couple days out, when
you're in this
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damn position,
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head to the floor, ass in the air.
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Supposedly praying to your great Allah
that you just renounced.
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You're gonna pray to little old me.
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Me.
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That wasn't so hard, now was it?
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Now I need to get to the other part.
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This whole fasting nonsense.
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See, I have a medical condition.
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I can't go a few hours without eating.
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Or else my blood sugar could drop so
dangerously low that I could end up in a
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coma with brain damage and die.
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Yeah, it's a very scary possibility, but
it's very true.
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Now, your body can go.
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Normal people's bodies can go days
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without food.
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But it's the water.
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The water is very important.
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I mean, very important.
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I mean, water makes up 80 % of you.
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You're very self -needed. You're fine.
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And by you dehydrating yourself during
the day, the hot
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day, you're causing yourself
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You shrivel up, work harder, therefore
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prematurely aging you.
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Tell me, do you really want to look like
you're 80 when you're barely 50 years
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old?
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I didn't think so.
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Dehydration causes multiple health
problems.
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Including wrinkles.
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So you really, really need to sit there
and start drinking some
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water.
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Yes, I know.
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Ramadan's only a couple days long.
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Left, I should say.
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It's a whole month, and here we are
catching the tail end of it.
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But no.
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How are you supposed to serve me?
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Long. Period.
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Years.
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Decades.
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If you're not healthy.
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I don't want an ill servant.
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I want the best. And only the best.
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You're sickly.
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You're useful for me.
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So, keep yourself in shape.
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Eat and drink plenty of fluids.
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Starving yourself and then binge eating
is a no -go.
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Absolutely a fucking no -go.
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I don't care if you have to sit there
and grab a bite.
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And drink a bottle of water in a
bathroom stall where no one will see
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Just fucking do it.
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Look, if you think I'm being harsh on
you and your religion,
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honey, just remember, Ramadan's not the
only holiday that exists.
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And every one.
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Just wait.
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Yom Kippur.
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Hanukkah.
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Kwanzaa.
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Christmas.
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It's all going down.
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I've just decided to start with you.
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Seeing how you guys are all oppressed.
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I'm looking for answers in a better way.
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Just wait.
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I'm starting with you.
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But soon, the rest of the world will
know that
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Goddess Amy is the only true religion.
102
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I'm the only thing that's going to be
served,
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worshipped, and adored.
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I am everything.
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And I'm going to be your everything.
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Starting...
6905
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