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1
00:00:01,523 --> 00:00:04,091
I'm 100% against this.
2
00:00:04,134 --> 00:00:06,832
Pam: Aw, you're 100%
against everything cool.
3
00:00:06,876 --> 00:00:08,617
Lana: No, I'm not.
Shut up.
4
00:00:08,660 --> 00:00:11,315
Like what?
Pam: Um, Ranch Tub.
5
00:00:11,359 --> 00:00:12,882
Lana: Oh, for the--
Krieger: Come on, man.
6
00:00:12,925 --> 00:00:14,666
Cheryl: Everybody
was against Ranch Tub!
7
00:00:14,710 --> 00:00:16,973
- Seriously, Pam, quit trying
to make Ranch Tub happen.
8
00:00:17,017 --> 00:00:19,106
Malory: Do I even want to know what that is?
9
00:00:19,149 --> 00:00:21,282
- Only if you neverwant to eat ranch again.
10
00:00:21,325 --> 00:00:23,327
Malory: I meant ranch.
Lana: What?
11
00:00:23,371 --> 00:00:24,676
Malory: That's a food?
Lana: It's not important.
12
00:00:24,720 --> 00:00:26,113
- I wouldn't go that far.
- Can we please--
13
00:00:26,156 --> 00:00:27,940
- Cyril, shut up.
Lana: Seriously.
14
00:00:27,984 --> 00:00:29,681
Come on, if we're gonna
do this, let's do it already.
15
00:00:29,725 --> 00:00:31,335
We're sitting ducks
with you two out there.
16
00:00:31,379 --> 00:00:33,816
- Well, whose fault is that?
Lana: What? Yours!
17
00:00:33,859 --> 00:00:35,731
You made us stop on the way
to Earth for the damn thing.
18
00:00:35,774 --> 00:00:38,386
- Exactly, and everybody
remember that
19
00:00:38,429 --> 00:00:40,257
when it's time to
divvy it up.
20
00:00:40,301 --> 00:00:41,650
Malory: Do you think
it's worth anything?
21
00:00:41,693 --> 00:00:44,522
- Hmm, hard to say.
22
00:00:44,566 --> 00:00:46,002
[blooping]
23
00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:47,351
I've never seen anything
like it.
24
00:00:47,395 --> 00:00:48,961
- So you just jam itwith my new pen?
25
00:00:49,005 --> 00:00:50,833
- This is new,
this pen right here?
26
00:00:50,876 --> 00:00:52,835
- Yes, as a matter--[scoffs]
27
00:00:52,878 --> 00:00:54,097
You know...
Cheryl: Ooh.
28
00:00:54,141 --> 00:00:55,229
Maybe it's ambergris.
29
00:00:55,272 --> 00:00:56,882
- How could it be ambergris?
30
00:00:56,926 --> 00:00:58,841
Cheryl:
If a whale puked it up, duh.
31
00:00:58,884 --> 00:01:00,408
- Oh, a space whale?
32
00:01:00,451 --> 00:01:02,323
Cheryl: I don't know
all the types of whale!
33
00:01:02,366 --> 00:01:04,412
- And yet somehow you know
about ambergr--
34
00:01:04,455 --> 00:01:06,066
Pam: Oh, maybe its mithril!
35
00:01:06,109 --> 00:01:07,284
Malory:
Is that some other food?
36
00:01:07,328 --> 00:01:09,243
- No!
And it's not mithril.
37
00:01:09,286 --> 00:01:10,722
Pam: Just checking.
38
00:01:10,766 --> 00:01:11,810
Lana:
Whatever the hell it is,
39
00:01:11,854 --> 00:01:12,898
just box it up
40
00:01:12,942 --> 00:01:13,899
and let's go already!
41
00:01:13,943 --> 00:01:15,292
- All right!
Jesus!
42
00:01:15,336 --> 00:01:16,902
So what do you think, Cyril?
43
00:01:16,946 --> 00:01:18,643
- [sighs]About what?
44
00:01:18,687 --> 00:01:21,429
- Is it firm enough
to shove in the box?
45
00:01:22,517 --> 00:01:25,085
[chuckles]
Nobody?
46
00:01:25,128 --> 00:01:26,651
Pam:
What, like "space phrasing"?
47
00:01:26,695 --> 00:01:29,306
- [sighs]
No. Never mind.
48
00:01:31,395 --> 00:01:34,355
[main title theme]
49
00:01:34,398 --> 00:01:41,144
♪
50
00:02:09,477 --> 00:02:10,304
[Geiger counter crackling]
51
00:02:10,347 --> 00:02:12,828
- And radiation levels are...
52
00:02:12,871 --> 00:02:15,352
normal...
across the spectrum.
53
00:02:15,396 --> 00:02:18,355
- Well, keep testing.Radiation's just one danger.
54
00:02:18,399 --> 00:02:20,183
That thing could be carryingdeadly bacteria
55
00:02:20,227 --> 00:02:21,706
or some kind of virus.
- First of all--
56
00:02:21,750 --> 00:02:24,013
- Bacteria and virus
are the same thing, dummy.
57
00:02:24,056 --> 00:02:25,275
- No, they're not.
- Shut up.
58
00:02:25,319 --> 00:02:26,929
Krieger?
- They are not.
59
00:02:26,972 --> 00:02:28,757
- Oh, well,
what am I thinking of?
60
00:02:28,800 --> 00:02:30,672
- Space whores,presumably.
61
00:02:30,715 --> 00:02:32,369
- Well, right then, I was,
but--
62
00:02:32,413 --> 00:02:34,197
- Hey, nobody gets out of thereuntil I'm sure
63
00:02:34,241 --> 00:02:35,764
that thing's not a hazard
to the ship,
64
00:02:35,807 --> 00:02:37,331
so the longer you dick around,
65
00:02:37,374 --> 00:02:39,202
the longer you're gonna stay
in quarantine.
66
00:02:39,246 --> 00:02:41,465
Any questions?
- What the--
67
00:02:41,509 --> 00:02:42,771
Pam: Yeah, are you doinks
done yet?
68
00:02:42,814 --> 00:02:44,903
'Cause I wanna checkthat crazy thing out.
69
00:02:44,947 --> 00:02:46,470
- Pam!
- What?
70
00:02:46,514 --> 00:02:48,255
- You just broke quarantine,
dumbass.
71
00:02:48,298 --> 00:02:49,778
So if there's anything
deadly on it,
72
00:02:49,821 --> 00:02:51,649
now the entire ship's infected.
73
00:02:51,693 --> 00:02:53,738
- Yeah,
but you wouldn't have been.
74
00:02:53,782 --> 00:02:55,392
- What?
- Helmet, genius.
75
00:02:55,436 --> 00:02:57,220
- [sighs]
God damn it.
76
00:02:57,264 --> 00:02:59,353
[warbling]
77
00:02:59,396 --> 00:03:01,442
- I'm gonna call him Cubert!
78
00:03:02,878 --> 00:03:05,576
Krieger:
Okay, that was the last test.
79
00:03:05,620 --> 00:03:08,144
And I can confidently say
that the object poses
80
00:03:08,188 --> 00:03:10,277
no nuclear, chemical,
or biological threat
81
00:03:10,320 --> 00:03:11,539
to the ship or crew.
82
00:03:11,582 --> 00:03:13,018
- [sighs]Not that we could've
83
00:03:13,062 --> 00:03:14,498
done anything about itif it did,
84
00:03:14,542 --> 00:03:15,369
thanks to Pam.
85
00:03:15,412 --> 00:03:16,413
- You are welcome.
86
00:03:16,457 --> 00:03:18,067
- Hey, can we take a second?
87
00:03:18,110 --> 00:03:19,851
Isn't it crazy that
that little scanner
88
00:03:19,895 --> 00:03:22,376
can do all those
wildly different tests?
89
00:03:22,419 --> 00:03:25,379
I mean, come on.
- Yeah, pretty great.
90
00:03:25,422 --> 00:03:28,295
- Yes, hooray for everything.
Now, what's it worth?
91
00:03:28,338 --> 00:03:30,035
- Well, that, I can't say.
92
00:03:30,079 --> 00:03:31,254
I don't even know
what elements it's made of...
93
00:03:31,298 --> 00:03:33,387
[laughs] Assuming
they're even known to us.
94
00:03:33,430 --> 00:03:35,040
I'll have to do
many more tests to--
95
00:03:35,084 --> 00:03:36,738
- Ooh, here's a test.
96
00:03:36,781 --> 00:03:38,392
Cut the damn thing open and--
97
00:03:38,435 --> 00:03:40,002
[all gasp]
Krieger: Whoa, hey!
98
00:03:40,045 --> 00:03:42,047
- Cool!
- Holy shit! It's magnetic!
99
00:03:42,091 --> 00:03:43,701
- No, I don't think so.
100
00:03:43,745 --> 00:03:45,660
There's metal all overthe place in here, so--
101
00:03:45,703 --> 00:03:47,531
- Oh, my God!
Our fillings!
102
00:03:47,575 --> 00:03:49,490
- What are you talking about?
- [groans]
103
00:03:49,533 --> 00:03:51,535
- A, fillings are nonferrous,
so--
104
00:03:51,579 --> 00:03:53,320
- [muffled yelling]
105
00:03:54,582 --> 00:03:58,368
- So--
- [muffled yelling]
106
00:03:58,412 --> 00:03:59,891
- So even if it were magnetic--
107
00:03:59,935 --> 00:04:01,980
- It's not gonna eatyour damn fillings.
108
00:04:02,894 --> 00:04:08,248
- [muffled muttering]
109
00:04:08,291 --> 00:04:10,554
- But I don't thinkit is a magnet.
110
00:04:10,598 --> 00:04:13,122
See?
- Well, then how...
111
00:04:13,165 --> 00:04:15,907
- Okay, um,pick up another scalpel.
112
00:04:16,778 --> 00:04:18,388
- And?
- Huh.
113
00:04:18,432 --> 00:04:19,824
Well, I had a theory--
114
00:04:19,868 --> 00:04:21,870
- [muttering mockingly]
115
00:04:21,913 --> 00:04:23,567
- Damn it, woman!If you don't--
116
00:04:23,611 --> 00:04:25,352
Ah!
Lana: Oh, shit.
117
00:04:25,395 --> 00:04:26,570
Krieger: [clears throat]
118
00:04:26,614 --> 00:04:28,224
That it was reactingto a weapon.
119
00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:30,400
- [gasps] Then let's kill it!
Kill it!
120
00:04:30,444 --> 00:04:31,662
Kill it before--
[screams]
121
00:04:31,706 --> 00:04:32,794
Lana: Whoa!
Krieger: Aah!
122
00:04:32,837 --> 00:04:34,274
- Oh, shit.
- Uh...
123
00:04:34,317 --> 00:04:36,537
- Hmm, or maybejust aggression.
124
00:04:36,580 --> 00:04:37,581
- What?
- Huh.
125
00:04:37,625 --> 00:04:38,582
- Come on, you're saying
126
00:04:38,626 --> 00:04:39,496
it can read our emotions?
127
00:04:39,540 --> 00:04:41,455
- I'm not sayinganything...yet.
128
00:04:41,498 --> 00:04:43,195
[thudding]
129
00:04:43,239 --> 00:04:44,936
- How 'bout now?
- Oh, no.
130
00:04:44,980 --> 00:04:48,375
Sorry, need to do a whole bigseries of tests before I can...
131
00:04:48,418 --> 00:04:49,941
[thudding]
132
00:04:50,942 --> 00:04:54,511
- Huh, still interrupting.
- Typical.
133
00:04:54,555 --> 00:04:57,122
- But we shouldprobably...uh...
134
00:04:57,166 --> 00:04:59,429
- Carol, come on.
Let's get out of there.
135
00:04:59,473 --> 00:05:00,648
[grunts]
136
00:05:00,691 --> 00:05:04,042
Wow, that's--
[groaning]
137
00:05:04,086 --> 00:05:05,957
Somebody give me a hand here.
- I can help.
138
00:05:06,001 --> 00:05:07,959
- Somebody strong.
- [sighs]
139
00:05:08,003 --> 00:05:11,746
- Ready?
[both groaning]
140
00:05:11,789 --> 00:05:14,792
- I mean--I mean,
that's crazy, right?
141
00:05:14,836 --> 00:05:17,404
All right, Jesus.
I'm doing it.
142
00:05:17,447 --> 00:05:19,449
Okay, Pam, you're up.
- Mm-kay.
143
00:05:19,493 --> 00:05:21,799
One, two, three, go.
144
00:05:21,843 --> 00:05:23,671
[all groaning]
145
00:05:23,714 --> 00:05:24,715
Son of a--
146
00:05:24,759 --> 00:05:28,545
Go!
[all groaning]
147
00:05:28,589 --> 00:05:30,504
[all panting]
148
00:05:30,547 --> 00:05:32,027
I just thought of something.
149
00:05:32,070 --> 00:05:34,334
- Oh, my God,
if you say "Ranch Tub"...
150
00:05:34,377 --> 00:05:35,422
- No, shut up.
151
00:05:35,465 --> 00:05:37,728
Look, I can bench, like,
500 kilos,
152
00:05:37,772 --> 00:05:40,427
so I can keep pulling
on her, but...
153
00:05:40,470 --> 00:05:41,689
- Eventuallysomething's gotta give.
154
00:05:41,732 --> 00:05:44,561
- Like her birdy
little neck bones.
155
00:05:44,605 --> 00:05:46,215
Because whatever
this thing is,
156
00:05:46,258 --> 00:05:48,391
I mean, it's obviously
supernatural.
157
00:05:48,435 --> 00:05:50,132
- Well, since when
is it supernatural?
158
00:05:50,175 --> 00:05:51,873
- Well, it's not a magnet.
- Oh, come on.
159
00:05:51,916 --> 00:05:54,179
- So those are
our only two options,
160
00:05:54,223 --> 00:05:55,964
ghosts or magnets?
161
00:05:56,007 --> 00:05:57,531
[thudding]
162
00:05:57,574 --> 00:05:58,488
- I mean...
- Oh, come on.
163
00:05:58,532 --> 00:06:00,185
This is just some bullshitof yours
164
00:06:00,229 --> 00:06:01,578
to put off going back to Earth.
165
00:06:01,622 --> 00:06:03,145
- [laughs]
What?
166
00:06:03,188 --> 00:06:05,016
So, what, Lana,
I conjured up
167
00:06:05,060 --> 00:06:07,628
some kind of...
telepathic ghost cube?
168
00:06:07,671 --> 00:06:10,457
- I didn't say youconjured it up, dickwrap.
169
00:06:10,500 --> 00:06:12,023
I said that...
170
00:06:12,067 --> 00:06:13,982
[eerie tone]
171
00:06:14,025 --> 00:06:15,897
- Huh.
- [sighs]
172
00:06:15,940 --> 00:06:16,941
[foot thuds]
173
00:06:16,985 --> 00:06:18,813
Well, I hope you're all...
174
00:06:18,856 --> 00:06:20,945
[body thuds]
- Jeezy Petes.
175
00:06:20,989 --> 00:06:22,947
- Happy.
- Is she breathing?
176
00:06:22,991 --> 00:06:25,210
- No.
- So she's...
177
00:06:25,254 --> 00:06:26,690
- I mean...
- Oh!
178
00:06:26,734 --> 00:06:29,171
If only we had access
to some sort of device
179
00:06:29,214 --> 00:06:30,738
which could tell us!
180
00:06:31,565 --> 00:06:33,349
Krieger!
- What's that?
181
00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:35,786
Oh, right, the scanner!
Doy.
182
00:06:35,830 --> 00:06:37,571
Hang on, let me reset it for...
183
00:06:37,614 --> 00:06:38,572
- [gasps]
184
00:06:38,615 --> 00:06:40,356
[all shout]
185
00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,663
- Are you okay?
- [coughing]
186
00:06:42,706 --> 00:06:44,447
I think so.
- What was it like?
187
00:06:44,491 --> 00:06:46,449
What did you see?
- I don't know. It...
188
00:06:46,493 --> 00:06:48,059
I can't explain it.
189
00:06:48,103 --> 00:06:49,539
[gasps]
Oh, my God!
190
00:06:49,583 --> 00:06:51,149
- What?
- I just remembered.
191
00:06:51,193 --> 00:06:53,761
- Remembered what?
- I don't even have fillings.
192
00:06:53,804 --> 00:06:56,198
[laughs]
193
00:06:56,241 --> 00:06:59,201
[eerie tone]
194
00:06:59,244 --> 00:07:02,857
♪
195
00:07:05,250 --> 00:07:06,556
[dramatic music]
196
00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:08,471
Pam: So that whole time
you're in there,
197
00:07:08,515 --> 00:07:10,517
you didn't see anything?
198
00:07:10,560 --> 00:07:13,041
- [mouth full] No, I mean,
it's hard to explain.
199
00:07:13,084 --> 00:07:15,913
It was kind of like I was
nothing...
200
00:07:15,957 --> 00:07:17,175
and everything.
201
00:07:17,219 --> 00:07:18,438
If that makes any sense.
202
00:07:18,481 --> 00:07:19,656
- About as muchas what normally
203
00:07:19,700 --> 00:07:21,092
comes out of your mouth.
204
00:07:21,136 --> 00:07:23,878
- And speaking of your mouth...
205
00:07:23,921 --> 00:07:25,488
- What about it?
206
00:07:25,532 --> 00:07:26,750
- You're really
packing it away there.
207
00:07:26,794 --> 00:07:28,491
- Um, I'm hungry.
Sue me.
208
00:07:28,535 --> 00:07:29,884
- I will if it turns out
you ate
209
00:07:29,927 --> 00:07:31,755
all the priceless filling
out of that cube.
210
00:07:31,799 --> 00:07:35,324
- Oh, my God.
[muffled muttering]
211
00:07:35,367 --> 00:07:38,283
- What?
- [muffled mumbling]
212
00:07:38,327 --> 00:07:39,633
- [sighs]Pointless.
213
00:07:39,676 --> 00:07:40,677
- You really think
it's worth something?
214
00:07:40,721 --> 00:07:41,678
- It's gotta be,
215
00:07:41,722 --> 00:07:43,245
I mean, to somebody.
216
00:07:43,288 --> 00:07:45,247
- And whom might
that somebody be?
217
00:07:45,290 --> 00:07:47,684
- Well, obviously we need
to do some market research,
218
00:07:47,728 --> 00:07:49,599
but it's--
- It's gone.
219
00:07:49,643 --> 00:07:50,687
- What?
- Wait, what?
220
00:07:50,731 --> 00:07:52,820
- Gone?
- [choking]
221
00:07:52,863 --> 00:07:55,562
- What are you doing?
- What's the matter?
222
00:07:55,605 --> 00:07:57,477
Hey, the food ain't
that bad, baby.
223
00:07:57,520 --> 00:08:00,349
- [coughing and retching]
224
00:08:00,392 --> 00:08:02,046
- What's wrong?Are you choking?
225
00:08:02,090 --> 00:08:04,788
- Typical.Cyril: W-w-w-what's the matter?
226
00:08:04,832 --> 00:08:07,356
- This is serious.
- Get a spoon in her!
227
00:08:07,399 --> 00:08:08,618
- Space phrasing!
[clears throat]
228
00:08:08,662 --> 00:08:11,055
No.
- Plus, that's a collectible!
229
00:08:11,099 --> 00:08:13,841
- [coughing]
- Get that spoon in her!
230
00:08:13,884 --> 00:08:16,800
- I'm trying.
- [retching]
231
00:08:16,844 --> 00:08:21,588
[guttural howling]
232
00:08:21,631 --> 00:08:22,632
[coughs]
[food squelches]
233
00:08:22,676 --> 00:08:23,633
Cyril: Oh, God.
Malory: Ugh!
234
00:08:23,677 --> 00:08:24,721
Krieger: Gross.
235
00:08:24,765 --> 00:08:26,680
- What the shit with the spoon?
236
00:08:26,723 --> 00:08:27,724
- I--
- We thought you were--
237
00:08:27,768 --> 00:08:28,986
- What, "She's choking,so let's shove
238
00:08:29,030 --> 00:08:30,597
a goddamn spoondown her throat"?
239
00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:32,686
- Yeah, Cyril.
- Hey, you know what?
240
00:08:32,729 --> 00:08:33,904
- I know the stupid cube
is gone.
241
00:08:33,948 --> 00:08:35,558
all: Yeah.
- Yeah, what happened?
242
00:08:35,602 --> 00:08:37,517
- Yeah, what the shit, Krieger?
243
00:08:37,560 --> 00:08:40,650
- It was right here on--well,
six inches above the table.
244
00:08:40,694 --> 00:08:43,523
I needed some more
sterilizing wipes, so I--
245
00:08:43,566 --> 00:08:44,959
- Why would you need
sterilizing wipes?
246
00:08:45,002 --> 00:08:47,396
- I...
- Oh, Krieger, buddy.
247
00:08:47,439 --> 00:08:48,615
Please tell me you didn't try
248
00:08:48,658 --> 00:08:49,703
to have sexwith the ghost cube.
249
00:08:49,746 --> 00:08:51,182
- Krieger!
- That's nasty, Krieger!
250
00:08:51,226 --> 00:08:52,619
Cheryl: Ew!
- No, of course I didn't.
251
00:08:52,662 --> 00:08:54,185
- We can check
the security footage.
252
00:08:54,229 --> 00:08:56,057
- There isn't any.
The camera was off.
253
00:08:56,100 --> 00:08:57,406
- Oh, how convenient.
254
00:08:57,449 --> 00:08:58,668
- I did not have sex
with the cube.
255
00:08:58,712 --> 00:09:01,192
- Because first of all,
with what?
256
00:09:01,236 --> 00:09:02,759
- Oh, okay, okay.
257
00:09:02,803 --> 00:09:05,327
You wanna make your stupid
little Ken Doll jokes?
258
00:09:05,370 --> 00:09:06,763
- Would they be warranted?
259
00:09:06,807 --> 00:09:08,112
- I--
- Focus, people.
260
00:09:08,156 --> 00:09:09,287
There's
a million credits' worth
261
00:09:09,331 --> 00:09:10,724
of ghost cube missing.
262
00:09:10,767 --> 00:09:12,639
[chuckles]
What happened, Ken?
263
00:09:12,682 --> 00:09:14,945
- [sighs annoyedly]
As I was saying...
264
00:09:14,989 --> 00:09:16,686
I needed
more sterilizing wipes.
265
00:09:16,730 --> 00:09:19,297
I need more sterilizing wipes.
[scatting]
266
00:09:19,341 --> 00:09:22,170
So I walked out the door, and after it closed behind me,
267
00:09:22,213 --> 00:09:23,998
I keyed in
the alphanumeric code
268
00:09:24,041 --> 00:09:24,999
to lock it.
269
00:09:25,042 --> 00:09:29,612
[keypad beeping]
270
00:09:29,656 --> 00:09:31,309
I walked down
to the supply room,
271
00:09:31,353 --> 00:09:33,529
got the wipes,
and walked back.
272
00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:36,880
I keyed in the code to unlock
the aforementioned door.
273
00:09:36,924 --> 00:09:41,624
[keypad beeping]
274
00:09:41,668 --> 00:09:43,017
[door clangs opens]
275
00:09:43,060 --> 00:09:44,235
I walked in...
276
00:09:44,279 --> 00:09:45,236
What the--
277
00:09:45,280 --> 00:09:46,803
The cube was gone.
278
00:09:46,847 --> 00:09:49,806
So obviously
one of you took it.
279
00:09:49,850 --> 00:09:50,981
- No, we did not!
- That's bullshit.
280
00:09:51,025 --> 00:09:52,722
- Nobody took
your new girlfriend.
281
00:09:52,766 --> 00:09:55,595
- Yeah, plus, we wereall together in the mess, so--
282
00:09:55,638 --> 00:09:56,987
- So how did it leave
a locked room?
283
00:09:57,031 --> 00:09:58,685
- Plenty of ways.
284
00:09:58,728 --> 00:10:00,121
Here, hold this.
285
00:10:00,164 --> 00:10:02,427
[shimmering tone]
286
00:10:02,471 --> 00:10:04,429
All right,let's go find that thing.
287
00:10:04,473 --> 00:10:05,866
And let's all split up.
288
00:10:05,909 --> 00:10:07,824
We can cover a lot more groundthat way.
289
00:10:07,868 --> 00:10:11,828
- So individually go bumblingaround this big ole spaceship
290
00:10:11,872 --> 00:10:12,960
looking for a ghost.
291
00:10:13,003 --> 00:10:15,353
- To bumble or notis up to you,
292
00:10:15,397 --> 00:10:18,182
but whoever finds itgets to keep it.
293
00:10:18,226 --> 00:10:19,923
- Wait, what?
Malory: Findies keepies!
294
00:10:19,967 --> 00:10:20,968
- Wait a minute, what?
- Huh?
295
00:10:21,011 --> 00:10:22,273
- [laughs]
296
00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:25,842
Cyril: Out of my way!
Cheryl: No, no, no, no!
297
00:10:25,886 --> 00:10:28,410
Get out of my way! No!
[all groaning]
298
00:10:28,453 --> 00:10:29,846
- And bumble it is.
299
00:10:29,890 --> 00:10:31,761
- Get out of my way, meathead.
- I saw it first!
300
00:10:31,805 --> 00:10:33,850
[all grunt]
- Wait a minute.
301
00:10:33,894 --> 00:10:36,287
Now, look, before you all
go running off half-cocked--
302
00:10:36,331 --> 00:10:37,680
- Krieger, we don't have timeto pile on you
303
00:10:37,724 --> 00:10:39,203
with a bunch of no-dick jokes.
304
00:10:39,247 --> 00:10:40,857
- I knew it
right when I said it.
305
00:10:40,901 --> 00:10:42,250
- I call bridge!
- Well, I'm coming with you.
306
00:10:42,293 --> 00:10:43,817
Lana: No, you're not.
- Uh...
307
00:10:43,860 --> 00:10:45,296
well, then I-I get
the crew quarters.
308
00:10:45,340 --> 00:10:47,081
- You better not
go in my boudoir.
309
00:10:47,124 --> 00:10:48,735
- Okay, I call dibson the--aah!
310
00:10:48,778 --> 00:10:51,651
- Dibs on them ribs, sucka!
- Oh, holy shit.
311
00:10:51,694 --> 00:10:52,869
That really hurt.
312
00:10:52,913 --> 00:10:55,959
- Well, if you thinkthat hurt...
313
00:10:56,003 --> 00:10:57,874
[laughs hysterically]
314
00:10:57,918 --> 00:10:59,484
- That's disconcerting.
315
00:10:59,528 --> 00:11:01,835
- Yeah, ya think?
316
00:11:01,878 --> 00:11:03,271
- Yes.
317
00:11:04,228 --> 00:11:05,708
Ray:
I said no, God damn it!
318
00:11:05,752 --> 00:11:06,840
- [groaning]
319
00:11:06,883 --> 00:11:07,884
- Get out!
- Hey!
320
00:11:07,928 --> 00:11:09,059
- I won't have you
manhandling
321
00:11:09,103 --> 00:11:10,495
my beautiful things.
322
00:11:10,539 --> 00:11:11,888
- Well, how do I knowit's not in there?
323
00:11:11,932 --> 00:11:14,935
- Because we said so.
- Who's "we"?
324
00:11:14,978 --> 00:11:16,327
[gun clicks]
325
00:11:16,371 --> 00:11:18,286
[scoffs]Is that supposed to be funny?
326
00:11:18,329 --> 00:11:20,070
[menacing music]
327
00:11:20,114 --> 00:11:21,681
[gun zaps]
Cyril: [yells]
328
00:11:21,724 --> 00:11:23,900
- [chuckles]
Hope it was his dick.
329
00:11:23,944 --> 00:11:25,902
Cyril: Right in the foot!
- Eh.
330
00:11:27,295 --> 00:11:28,731
Lana: Any luck?
- No, Lana.
331
00:11:28,775 --> 00:11:31,778
And this is my area, so...
332
00:11:31,821 --> 00:11:33,344
[eerie music]
- So...
333
00:11:33,388 --> 00:11:36,913
- So--so talk
about space whores, huh?
334
00:11:36,957 --> 00:11:39,350
- Excuse me?
- I, um...
335
00:11:39,394 --> 00:11:42,136
Uh, nothing.
Uh, ne--never mind.
336
00:11:42,179 --> 00:11:44,007
- I'll never your mind.
337
00:11:44,051 --> 00:11:45,356
- Um, airball.
338
00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:47,489
Lana: I'll...air your balls.
339
00:11:47,532 --> 00:11:49,012
- [chuckles]
Yeah, yeah, you will.
340
00:11:49,056 --> 00:11:50,797
Lana: God damn it!
341
00:11:50,840 --> 00:11:52,494
- [sighs] Holy shit,
I think I'm seeing things.
342
00:11:52,537 --> 00:11:54,322
I maybe need to get
some sleep, huh?
343
00:11:54,365 --> 00:11:57,412
[chuckles]Or at least my balls aired out.
344
00:11:57,455 --> 00:11:58,935
- Yeah, right?
- [screams]
345
00:11:58,979 --> 00:12:00,763
man: Hey.
- Who the hell are you, man?
346
00:12:00,807 --> 00:12:03,723
man: What are you--
I'm TV's Michael Gray.
347
00:12:03,766 --> 00:12:05,594
- TV's Michael Gray who?
348
00:12:05,637 --> 00:12:08,989
Michael: Uh, TV's Michael Gray
says quit being a dick
349
00:12:09,032 --> 00:12:10,381
and open the door?
350
00:12:10,425 --> 00:12:12,079
Seriously, quit being a dick.
351
00:12:12,122 --> 00:12:15,125
- Okay, um, h-hang on.
352
00:12:15,169 --> 00:12:16,823
Okay, on three.Ready?
353
00:12:16,866 --> 00:12:17,998
Michael:
Can we not do it on one?
354
00:12:18,041 --> 00:12:19,826
- Shut up, okay.
355
00:12:19,869 --> 00:12:21,001
One...
356
00:12:21,044 --> 00:12:21,784
two!
357
00:12:23,003 --> 00:12:24,961
[chilling music]
358
00:12:25,005 --> 00:12:27,355
[gulps]
Disconcerting.
359
00:12:31,272 --> 00:12:32,229
- [whispering] Michael.
360
00:12:32,273 --> 00:12:33,927
TV's Michael Gray.
361
00:12:33,970 --> 00:12:35,537
Mikey-Mike, where are you?
362
00:12:35,580 --> 00:12:37,017
Pam:
Who the hell's Mikey-Mike?
363
00:12:37,060 --> 00:12:39,149
- Exactly, that's what I'm--
[screams]
364
00:12:39,193 --> 00:12:40,803
- 'Cause you think he'd like
some of this?
365
00:12:40,847 --> 00:12:42,718
[grunting]
366
00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:43,850
- What? No.
367
00:12:43,893 --> 00:12:45,808
Stop that.
What--what are you doing?
368
00:12:45,852 --> 00:12:48,071
- [munching]
369
00:12:48,115 --> 00:12:49,943
[mouth full]
I'm hungry. Sue me.
370
00:12:49,986 --> 00:12:51,248
[gulps]
371
00:12:51,292 --> 00:12:52,772
And then get up to the bridge.
372
00:12:52,815 --> 00:12:54,512
Her Lanaship has
some big announcement.
373
00:12:54,556 --> 00:12:55,905
- Whoa, what,did somebody find it?
374
00:12:55,949 --> 00:12:58,168
- [burps]
Find what?
375
00:12:58,212 --> 00:13:00,388
- [gulps]
What cube?
376
00:13:00,431 --> 00:13:02,085
- Mother, I am extremely
not in the mood,
377
00:13:02,129 --> 00:13:04,087
so seriously, where is it?
378
00:13:04,131 --> 00:13:07,830
- You mean like an ice cubeor something in a Rubik--
379
00:13:07,874 --> 00:13:09,919
- Quit dicking around already!
- Hey, whoa.
380
00:13:09,963 --> 00:13:11,442
- I'm talking about
the mysterious
381
00:13:11,486 --> 00:13:13,575
and possibly haunted
ghost cube
382
00:13:13,618 --> 00:13:15,403
that Carol got
her head stuck in.
383
00:13:15,446 --> 00:13:16,970
- I think I'd remember that.
384
00:13:17,013 --> 00:13:18,972
- And I'd be the first one
to believe
385
00:13:19,015 --> 00:13:20,712
she got her head
stuck in something.
386
00:13:20,756 --> 00:13:22,105
- Thank you.
387
00:13:22,149 --> 00:13:23,846
- But you are just
sounding insane.
388
00:13:23,890 --> 00:13:26,109
- You sound insane!
All of you!
389
00:13:26,153 --> 00:13:29,721
Oh, oh, and I all know
what you're trying to do.
390
00:13:29,765 --> 00:13:30,897
- You wanna
391
00:13:30,940 --> 00:13:33,421
maybe walk usthrough that?
392
00:13:33,464 --> 00:13:34,814
- [chuckles]Oh, my God.
393
00:13:34,857 --> 00:13:37,033
I know somebodyfound the cube
394
00:13:37,077 --> 00:13:38,426
and that it'sfindies keepies.
395
00:13:38,469 --> 00:13:40,036
- You mean finders keepers.
396
00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:41,995
- But don't stand thereand lie to me.
397
00:13:42,038 --> 00:13:43,692
- Nobody's--
- Plus, you dressing
398
00:13:43,735 --> 00:13:45,563
like a whore?
- Excuse me?
399
00:13:45,607 --> 00:13:48,001
- And how is Cyril's foot okay?- Uh, what, now?
400
00:13:48,044 --> 00:13:49,654
- You got shot in the foot,
asshole.
401
00:13:49,698 --> 00:13:52,396
And, oh, my God,
TV's Michael Gray?
402
00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:53,484
- TV's Michael who?
- Huh?
403
00:13:53,528 --> 00:13:54,964
- All right.
404
00:13:55,008 --> 00:13:57,140
I don't know if you got
in the meds locker
405
00:13:57,184 --> 00:14:01,014
or if this is just the onset
of tertiary syphilis, but--
406
00:14:01,057 --> 00:14:02,624
- He better not have syphilis.
407
00:14:02,667 --> 00:14:04,321
- Why had he better not
have syphilis?
408
00:14:04,365 --> 00:14:07,368
- I--wh--because syphilisis bad, dude.
409
00:14:07,411 --> 00:14:09,022
- Listen to me, God damn it!
[glass shatters]
410
00:14:09,065 --> 00:14:10,371
- Oh!
- Easy!
411
00:14:10,414 --> 00:14:11,372
- Whoa, whoa, whoa,whoa, whoa, man.
412
00:14:11,415 --> 00:14:13,113
- And speaking of meds,
413
00:14:13,156 --> 00:14:17,117
don't you think you could use
a bit of a...relaxer?
414
00:14:17,160 --> 00:14:18,901
- No!
- Oh, now...
415
00:14:18,945 --> 00:14:21,904
Krieger, don't you havesomething to take the edge off?
416
00:14:21,948 --> 00:14:23,558
- As a matter of fact...
417
00:14:23,601 --> 00:14:25,255
- You and your pills
keep away from me, you--
418
00:14:25,299 --> 00:14:26,996
you dickless fish!
[gun clicks]
419
00:14:27,040 --> 00:14:28,041
- Wha--
Ray: He's got a gun!
420
00:14:28,084 --> 00:14:29,390
- Sterling!
421
00:14:29,433 --> 00:14:31,522
Sterling, look at me.
422
00:14:31,566 --> 00:14:33,133
Now, I don't knowwhat's wrong,
423
00:14:33,176 --> 00:14:37,093
but I promise you,whatever it is, we'll fix it.
424
00:14:37,137 --> 00:14:38,703
But first you have to trust us.
425
00:14:38,747 --> 00:14:40,401
- Oh, no.
- Suit yourself.
426
00:14:40,444 --> 00:14:42,055
Krieger?
Krieger: Yep, yep, yep!
427
00:14:42,098 --> 00:14:43,056
Archer: No, no, no, no--
[dart thwacks]
428
00:14:43,099 --> 00:14:44,622
[groans]
429
00:14:44,666 --> 00:14:46,668
[moans]
430
00:14:46,711 --> 00:14:48,235
You dick.
[gunshot]
431
00:14:48,278 --> 00:14:49,236
- Jesus!
- [screams]
432
00:14:49,279 --> 00:14:50,759
[Cyril wails painfully]
433
00:14:50,802 --> 00:14:52,369
- [chuckles weakly]
434
00:14:52,413 --> 00:14:53,675
[body thuds]
435
00:14:53,718 --> 00:14:56,156
- [sighs] All right.
436
00:14:56,199 --> 00:14:58,071
Krieger, take him down
to the med lab
437
00:14:58,114 --> 00:15:01,117
and try to find out what inthe hell's the matter with him.
438
00:15:01,161 --> 00:15:02,989
Cyril [whining]:
Him? What about me?
439
00:15:03,032 --> 00:15:04,642
- We know
what's wrong with you.
440
00:15:04,686 --> 00:15:06,514
- Yeah, foot hole.
441
00:15:06,557 --> 00:15:08,081
Malory: Well?
442
00:15:08,124 --> 00:15:09,299
Krieger: Well, it's really
kind of weird.
443
00:15:09,343 --> 00:15:11,171
Lana: Uh, no shit.
444
00:15:11,214 --> 00:15:12,737
Krieger: The scanner
shows normal vitals
445
00:15:12,781 --> 00:15:14,087
and doesn't show anything
446
00:15:14,130 --> 00:15:16,263
physicallyor neurologically unusual.
447
00:15:16,306 --> 00:15:18,134
No drugs in his systemand...
448
00:15:18,178 --> 00:15:21,137
just what I assume isa therapeutic level of bourbon.
449
00:15:21,181 --> 00:15:23,574
- And...no syphilis?
450
00:15:23,618 --> 00:15:25,968
- No venereal diseaseof any kind.
451
00:15:26,012 --> 00:15:27,317
Or judgment, by the way.
452
00:15:27,361 --> 00:15:28,971
- Don't care.
- Eh.
453
00:15:29,015 --> 00:15:31,104
- How does that thing
know all that?
454
00:15:31,147 --> 00:15:32,670
- I know. Pretty great.
455
00:15:32,714 --> 00:15:34,846
- All right, keep scanning
or whatever,
456
00:15:34,890 --> 00:15:36,196
and keep him down here
457
00:15:36,239 --> 00:15:38,111
until you find out
what's wrong with him.
458
00:15:38,154 --> 00:15:40,200
[ice cubes rattle]
My therapeutic levels are low.
459
00:15:40,243 --> 00:15:42,550
- And I could actually usesome sterilizing wipes.
460
00:15:42,593 --> 00:15:44,552
- I'll bet.Keep an eye on him?
461
00:15:44,595 --> 00:15:46,293
- Mm-hmm.
462
00:15:46,336 --> 00:15:48,251
[keypad beeping]
463
00:15:48,295 --> 00:15:50,993
[lock clicks]
Uh...hello?
464
00:15:51,037 --> 00:15:54,301
Is there a reason you locked
the door from the outside?
465
00:15:54,344 --> 00:15:56,781
Krieger? Hello?
466
00:15:56,825 --> 00:15:58,653
[sighs annoyedly]
Super.
467
00:15:58,696 --> 00:16:00,220
Archer: Is it?
- Oh!
468
00:16:00,263 --> 00:16:01,612
Jesus Christ, Archer!
469
00:16:01,656 --> 00:16:03,571
What are you doing?You scared the shit out of me!
470
00:16:03,614 --> 00:16:04,572
- Oh, I'm sorry.
471
00:16:04,615 --> 00:16:05,573
Pam: Well...
472
00:16:05,616 --> 00:16:07,270
what'd ya expect, nerfnuts?
473
00:16:07,314 --> 00:16:09,011
It's alcohol.It's gonna hurt.
474
00:16:09,055 --> 00:16:10,360
- Well, if you think
that hurt...
475
00:16:10,404 --> 00:16:12,275
- Yes! Yes, I do
think it hurt!
476
00:16:12,319 --> 00:16:14,408
- You'd better not
be wasting that.
477
00:16:14,451 --> 00:16:17,628
- Um, guess it kind of dependson how you mean.
478
00:16:17,672 --> 00:16:19,456
- I mean, we've really
only got
479
00:16:19,500 --> 00:16:21,197
two options here, Lana.
480
00:16:21,241 --> 00:16:24,244
One is that this is all
some sort of ruse,
481
00:16:24,287 --> 00:16:26,811
and the other
is that I'm crazy.
482
00:16:26,855 --> 00:16:29,031
- You're kind of acting crazy.
483
00:16:29,075 --> 00:16:31,164
- I don't think
I'm acting crazy.
484
00:16:31,207 --> 00:16:33,470
- That's kind ofone of the symptoms.
485
00:16:33,514 --> 00:16:35,995
- Ah, the old catch-21.
486
00:16:36,038 --> 00:16:39,955
- [chuckles nervously]21, 22, whatever it takes.
487
00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:41,435
[hair rips]
Ow! Shit!
488
00:16:41,478 --> 00:16:44,003
Jesus Christ, you arecrazy!
489
00:16:44,046 --> 00:16:46,309
- Yeah?
Would a crazy person do this?
490
00:16:46,353 --> 00:16:48,398
- No, no, no, no, wait!
- [grunts]
491
00:16:48,442 --> 00:16:50,226
- Oof.
[weakly] Yes.
492
00:16:50,270 --> 00:16:52,228
[static crackling]
493
00:16:52,272 --> 00:16:54,361
- [roars]
- [groans]
494
00:16:54,404 --> 00:16:56,276
- [roars]
- [grunts]
495
00:16:56,319 --> 00:16:58,800
[menacing music]
496
00:16:58,843 --> 00:17:00,802
[groaning]
497
00:17:00,845 --> 00:17:04,066
- [scatting]
498
00:17:04,110 --> 00:17:05,633
[keypad beeping]
499
00:17:05,676 --> 00:17:06,851
Lana: No, no, no, no, no, no!
500
00:17:06,895 --> 00:17:08,157
- Hey, what the--
501
00:17:08,201 --> 00:17:10,159
- [muffled screaming]
- [gasps]
502
00:17:10,203 --> 00:17:12,161
[alarm blaring]
female voice: Emergency.
503
00:17:12,205 --> 00:17:13,249
Med lab.
504
00:17:13,293 --> 00:17:14,816
- What emergency?
505
00:17:14,859 --> 00:17:16,122
- Well, it has been
almost a minute
506
00:17:16,165 --> 00:17:17,471
since Archer got
some attention.
507
00:17:17,514 --> 00:17:19,255
- You're just a mess.
508
00:17:19,299 --> 00:17:20,387
- Holy shit! Look!
509
00:17:20,430 --> 00:17:23,129
- Oh, my God! Come on!
510
00:17:23,172 --> 00:17:25,348
- Come on, come on,
come on, come on!
511
00:17:25,392 --> 00:17:26,349
[negative beep]
512
00:17:26,393 --> 00:17:27,655
Argh!
513
00:17:27,698 --> 00:17:31,441
- [grunting]
- [muffled screaming]
514
00:17:31,485 --> 00:17:33,008
- Come on, come on,
come on, come on,
515
00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:34,053
come on, come on,
come on, come on!
516
00:17:34,096 --> 00:17:35,837
- Why the hell is it so long?
517
00:17:35,880 --> 00:17:37,491
- [coughing] Space phrasing.
- That's just how it comes!
518
00:17:37,534 --> 00:17:38,709
- [coughing] Twofer.
- Oh, my God,
519
00:17:38,753 --> 00:17:40,320
just reset it,Dr. Science!
520
00:17:40,363 --> 00:17:42,583
- [yelling] Will you shut up?
521
00:17:42,626 --> 00:17:46,108
If I mess up, I have to start
all over again!
522
00:17:46,152 --> 00:17:47,544
- [grunting]
523
00:17:47,588 --> 00:17:49,111
- Sterling, stop!
524
00:17:49,155 --> 00:17:50,460
Do you hear me?
525
00:17:50,504 --> 00:17:52,288
[static crackling]
Stop it this instant!
526
00:17:52,332 --> 00:17:53,333
- What are you doing?
527
00:17:53,376 --> 00:17:54,943
[both grunting]
528
00:17:54,986 --> 00:17:57,250
My frickin' tit!
529
00:17:57,293 --> 00:17:58,468
- [muffled screaming]
530
00:17:58,512 --> 00:17:59,556
- Sterling! [yelps]
531
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:01,384
- A Tennessee titty twister?
532
00:18:01,428 --> 00:18:02,907
[grunts]
all: Whoa!
533
00:18:02,951 --> 00:18:05,823
- Well, how do ya likethese titties?
534
00:18:05,867 --> 00:18:07,216
[grunts]
- [yelps]
535
00:18:07,260 --> 00:18:10,393
- [panting]
Lana? Are you all right?
536
00:18:10,437 --> 00:18:11,655
- I...
537
00:18:11,699 --> 00:18:13,527
[groans] I think so.
538
00:18:13,570 --> 00:18:15,268
- Ugh, my magazine's not.
539
00:18:15,311 --> 00:18:19,228
- Shut up.
And, Pam, Gillette...
540
00:18:19,272 --> 00:18:21,448
throw his ass in the brig.
541
00:18:21,491 --> 00:18:22,449
[dramatic music]
542
00:18:22,492 --> 00:18:24,059
- [yelling] Yeah, well...
543
00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:26,409
I guess we'll see about that!
544
00:18:26,453 --> 00:18:27,845
Huh?
545
00:18:27,889 --> 00:18:30,109
Pfff.
The brig.
546
00:18:30,152 --> 00:18:31,545
Like, where do they get off?
547
00:18:31,588 --> 00:18:33,634
They're the ones running aroundchanging clothes
548
00:18:33,677 --> 00:18:35,766
and shooting people in the neckwith darts
549
00:18:35,810 --> 00:18:38,856
and...eating
perfectly good magazines.
550
00:18:38,900 --> 00:18:40,684
You know?
I mean, that's crazy.
551
00:18:40,728 --> 00:18:42,295
I mean, right?
552
00:18:43,818 --> 00:18:45,211
- Yes, sir.
- Yeah.
553
00:18:45,254 --> 00:18:47,343
Thank you.Mmm.
554
00:18:47,387 --> 00:18:49,040
God, that's good.
555
00:18:50,041 --> 00:18:53,958
Wait, are...are--are yousupposed to be here?
556
00:18:56,004 --> 00:18:57,440
- No, sir.
557
00:18:57,484 --> 00:19:01,140
- Huh.Now, that's disconcerting.
558
00:19:01,183 --> 00:19:02,358
- Yes, sir.
559
00:19:36,262 --> 00:19:39,656
- Made in Georgia.
38716
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