Original subtitles

Thank you, Steve.

Tell the commissioner we made it in plenty of time.

Thank you, Miss Fletcher. I will.

George, take the Princess and Blinsky back to New York. They'll be leaving

away.

Thank you, Princess.

You and I in America are very pleasant ones. Thanks to you.

Susan, we have had such a wonderful time.

Won't you marry one of us?

Otherwise we'll be sad.

We floods are so sad, ain't we?

Look, you boys are very nice.

And each one of you is pretty neat in his own way.

I'm sure you must be hot stuff in the Caucasus.

However, just at the moment, I'm not interested in getting married.

But if I should change my mind, you might leave your names and addresses.

We will be waiting for you.

Goodbye. Goodbye, Susie.

Gentlemen are in the library.

Fletcher, I'm afraid you're late. Your father's furious.

Tell Lotus to draw my bath. I'll be right up. Very well, miss.

Good morning. It's about time.

Oh, Daddy, don't tell me you've been waiting up all night for me. No, I have

not. You know my mental mastodons of the law, Barton, Barton, and the son of a

Barton?

And those two hulks are detectives.

Now, just a minute, Mr. Fletcher. You hired us to find your grandchildren for

you, and we did.

You did?

They're living in Greenwich Village.

Well, have you seen them? How are they? When can we get them? Sorry, but you

can't have them. Why not?

They were my sister's children. I'm sorry, Miss Fletcher, but our agents in

France have examined the adoption papers. They are all in order.

Your sister's husband, on the day he died, made his brother legal guardians.

There's just nothing we can do about it. Can't we claim he was insane?

After all, he must have been. Not to give the children to us. My father can

everything for them. Maybe I was cruel to their father and mother, but they

disobeyed me.

However, that's no reason why the children should suffer.

No matter who was at fault. There's only one way open to you. If he were without

visible means of support.

Barton says that since he came back from Europe, he's had seven jobs.

Every time he loses one, he pops right up with another.

In the morning, he works for Dermot O 'Neill, 50 Gay Street.

In the afternoon, he paints signs for Walker's department store.

And one evening a week, he seconds a prize fighter called Mike Malloy.

Let me talk to him, Father. Maybe he'll listen to me.

That should be an interesting meeting. Here.

Here's a little check I offered him. It's for $10 ,000.

And here's his endorsement. Give this to your own Brett.

She can buy herself a cheap prince with it. Signed, John O 'Halloran.

Very amusing.

So, Mr. Barton, you admit there's nothing more that you can do? I've done

everything that's possible.

Well, maybe you've all given up, but I haven't. And what do you suggest?

A woman.

Someone who's clever enough and attractive enough.

Where are you going to find someone like that?

Aren't you overlooking me?

You know, I think she's got something there. Yes, I noticed you noticing it.

Susan, what are you going to do?

Well, I don't know until I get down there and see what it's all about.

Whatever you're going to do, I forbid it.

Darling, why should a stupid, spiteful young man interfere in our family

affairs? I'm going down to Greenwich Village and get those children somehow.

But you can't handle this man. Why, he's an artist. He's lived abroad in Paris

on the left bank. You know the kind of thing that goes on on the left bank. You

haven't had enough experience.

You forget I was a senior at Vassar.

Well, there it is, driver. Stop.

A dollar twenty, miss.

You can keep the change.

Gee, thanks.

It's for some driving lessons.

Questo capello è fatto per lei?

Sì, ma non è sempre che sia troppo vecchia? Ma no, no, signora, non sia

ridicola, guardi!

Non mi fa decidere. Si volte dall 'altra parte, per favore.

Non so, veramente.

Le vorrei uno rosso, piuttosto rosso. Per me è scuro, mi starebbe meglio.

It looks like a cannon on the mountain of Gibraltar.

Really? I'll take it.

Thank you very much.

One buck. A dollar.

Thank you.

Goodbye, ma 'am. I'll be back.

I beg your pardon, but I'd like to... Just a moment.

I believe there was someone here ahead of you.

Well, Bluebeard, what can I do for you?

Look, O 'Halloran, I'd like to sell you a nice flute.

It's bent.

Is it supposed to be bent?

No, it just sort of curled up and bent when I began to play saxophone tunes on

it. Well, it looks as though it could look like an antique.

I'll give you $3. All right, it's yours.

Don't be a sucker. It's worth $6 if I know anything about bent flutes.

I'll give you $3 .50 for it. All right, it's a deal.

You know it's worth $5 .50. That's the trouble with you capitalists. Don't let

him take advantage of you.

I'll give you $3 .75.

That's all right by me. But not by...

you know but what this poor man has five children and a wife at home starving

have you i hope not i'll give you four bucks for it sold don't let

him teach you five is our rock bottom price oh it is then you can take it away

because i don't want it now see what you've done oh harran i'll let you have

well two dollars i'll give you one dollar sold that's the trouble with a

these free thinkers going about interfering with other people's business

why don't you go outside and interfere in somebody else's business? In good

time, my man, but first of all, I'd like a little courtesy.

And secondly, I'd like to see Mr. O 'Neill.

Well, I'm awfully sorry, madam, but our Mr. O 'Neill is taking his morning

siesta. Pray, can't I be of service to madam?

Now, snap out of it, babe. What do you want? I still want to see Mr.

O 'Neill. Well, he's still asleep.

Mr. O 'Neill!

Mr. O 'Neill! Mr.

O 'Neill!

Wait a minute. What's going on down here? Who are you?

Me? Why, I'm Dermot O 'Neill. He says you're asleep.

Ah, pay no attention to her, Dermot. She's crazy.

Do you hear that? He calls me a lunatic.

Mr. O 'Neill, I came down here in all pleasance to rent a room and was

immediately insulted by this office boy.

John, I'm ashamed of you. I wouldn't keep him another moment, Mr. O 'Neill. I

demand that you fire him. If you were a good businessman, you would.

Being a good businessman, I can't. You see, he only works here for his rent,

I'd be out there.

Well, why don't you dispossess him? Oh, he's tried that, too. But I wouldn't go,

would I, Dermot?

No. No.

I'm sorry about the room, miss. There are no vacancies. But there's plenty

the street.

But I've just got to have a room here.

I can't go anyplace else.

And why not?

Because, uh, because I haven't any money.

Pay no attention to her, Dermot. She probably heard you were assaulting.

She strikes me as being a very unpleasant sort of person.

kids, upstairs.

Goodbye. Come in again when you want to buy something.

Look, Mr. O 'Neill, you have to give me a place to sleep. I'm tired and I'm

hungry and I haven't had anything to eat for two days.

I'm sorry, miss, but there are no vacancies.

Dear March, couldn't she use the old laundry room for a bit?

No, nobody lives there.

That's where we keep our rats.

Come on. Well, if you wouldn't mind living in... Anywhere, as long as it's a

place to sleep.

All right, then.

But you'll have to sign an IOU the first of every week or out you'll go. I'll be

glad to sign anything, Mr. O 'Neill.

like the ghost of an old place that might have died 200 years ago.

Yes, and I might as well rent it out to ghosts.

I don't get no rent from these monkeys.

Those two children who came through the store just now, do they belong to your

clerk? They do at the moment.

They look kind of sweet. Will I be living near them? No.

I promised I'd make you comfortable, didn't I? Stop!

How much do you weigh? What for?

I need a new partner. Quick, how much do you weigh? 106.

With or without your clothes? Without.

Too heavy. A cow.

Move!

He ought to be in a lunatic asylum.

I tried to put him in there several times, but they won't have him. He's too

crazy.

I'll kill him.

I'll kill him. That's what I'll do.

I'll kill him. What's wrong?

Did he double -cross Mary as you thought he might? Once. The cad.

Strangling. Don't let that dirty dog live another minute.

Why don't you have him arrested?

There's no police at the North Pole.

Are you going all the way up there to commit murder?

It's the villain in his book.

Why don't you poison him? Too quick. I want a long, foul, lingering death for

him, the rat.

Well, why don't you let him freeze to death slowly, starting at his toes. And

his toes begin to drop off one by one, give him a toothache in all his teeth.

That's good.

Good. And in his delirium, let him dream of a kind...

What'll you be doing in it?

Oh, I intend to be an actress.

Oh.

She's dead.

The body's still warm.

And did he suffer horribly? Oh, beautifully.

I stabbed him with a split infinitive.

Well, don't keep him too long. We've been having a lot of hot weather lately.

Oh, my.

Oh, Miss.

Are you hurt?

No, I'm all right. All right. Well, I'll have that plaster up in a jiffy. And if

you want to take a bath, here's the tub.

Thank you.

Oh, Mr. O 'Neill, could I have

my key? Key?

We don't use any keys around here.

All my tenants are honest, respectable people.

I beg your pardon?

Do you have any sugar that I can borrow?

Not today.

Oh.

Thank you, just the same.

Have you seen Stransky around?

Why, I don't... Please!

Well, if you see him, tell him to look out. His wife is looking for him.

What is this, Grand

Central Station?

I'm the plasterer.

Well, I don't need any plaster today.

Can't you see I'm taking a bath?

Go right ahead. You won't disturb me.

Would you mind getting out of here?

In a moment.

But O 'Neal told me to plaster up that hole, and I'm very conscientious. Well,

if you don't get out of here, I'll have to call the police.

Don't disturb yourself.

Since I have to stay, I'll call them for you.

Riot Squad will be here in a couple of weeks.

That was very amusing.

You may go now.

John! George is back!

George! George! John is in here!

George!

Come on, George is back!

Would you mind holding your reunion on somebody else's campus?

Hello, George!

Anybody in there? Come on in! George is back!

Did you do anything any good over there? Just my muscle, please.

What do you call it?

Gastronomic rhythm.

This sort of work, George, is unquestionably the embryo of all future

don't you think so?

Oh, I must say, George has a knack for stopping the psychosis of his subject

right on the nuance.

Now, will you get him out of here?

Hmm. Unsocial.

Very thin.

Fooly. Come on, let's go to some more congenial place. Oh, I don't see Jean

-Michel. She's very sensitive, isn't she?

You see how unappreciative the great unwashed are?

Who's there?

A friend.

Well, pass friend and annoy somebody else.

Ready or not, here I come.

Wait a minute. Who are you?

Well, I'm supposed to be living here.

Have we met?

No, I haven't had the pleasure.

Hey, Carl, come on. Over to my place, huh?

John, you stay out of this. Oh, come on, Carl.

Sandman's calling.

And I think the lady would like to be alone.

What lady?

You know, John, I think you're drunk.

Come on, take me to my room. Put me to bed. Yes, go put him to bed. No, it

do. When I make a bed, I lie in it myself.

I, madam, am Carl Stevens.

Well, don't stand there like a ninny. Give me a hand.

Put his arm around your shoulder like this.

Come on.

There, boy.

Is he the Carl Stevens that married Lillian Carter? What's left of him is.

Is this why she divorced him? No, because she divorced him.

That's right.

Why can't people like her stay above 14th Street where they belong and leave

alone?

Seems to me a little old -fashioned, drinking your life away over a woman.

Well, it's his life and his woman. At least he thought she was.

But he was very successful.

My father... I knew a man who paid a thousand dollars for one of his

Etchings? John, I just did a new etching.

Pulled myself together.

It's the best thing I ever did.

I want you to look at it.

You'd know.

Why, it's blank. It's beautiful.

Yes, it's beautiful.

Best thing I ever did. Open the door.

I'll get you the bed. You'll be all right in no time. No, no, no. Let go of

arm. Let go of my arm.

All right, Katie.

Now, come on, Carl.

Over here and lie down. I don't want to lie down.

Oh, everything turns and rolls right over me when I lie down.

Joan, the iodine.

Isn't any iodine left? Go across the street and get some.

Just a minute.

You can get a small bottle for 15 cents.

That's 10 cents change.

And please don't spend it on any trash like flowers.

Don't know her well enough.

I wonder... Shh!

How long have you known Johnny?

I only met him today.

Do you like him?

I think he's very kind.

We just thought you ought to know. He likes all pretty girls.

What's this? John made it. It's a relief map of the battle of Gettysburg.

You know, the Civil War.

Have you already come up to the Civil War in school?

We don't go to school.

You don't go to school?

John doesn't believe in the educational system.

He says all they teach you is to expect to be president of the United States or

a millionaire.

And we don't want to be either.

I shouldn't think it'd be much fun.

What do you want to be?

We don't know yet.

John says it's mainly finding out about yourself, what you want, and then going

out and getting it. I suppose he's right.

John do these?

Yes, he did.

Who did this?

Oh, John, of course.

Do you bite your nails?

Oh, no. Why?

Oh, that's too bad, because there's nothing John hates as much as that.

Does he do much of that kind of work?

Not anymore.

When we were in France, he always did.

Is that the natural color of your hair?

Yes.

Sorry. That's too bad.

Now, look, girls.

You don't have to be afraid of me at all.

I've just come down here to find out about myself.

That's all.

Oh!

Won't you sit down?

Make yourself comfortable?

Would you like a cigarette?

Or some coffee?

You know, I think women should always talk things over first. Then there'd be

misunderstandings. Don't you think so?

Certainly. Sure.

Here you are.

Ten cents, please.

John! I couldn't resist them, really.

They beg piteously to be taken home.

There's one for you.

Thank you, John.

And there's one for you. Thank you, John.

And one for you.

I never take flowers from strangers.

Now, what have you two brats been up to?

What's your name?

They called me Susan.

I like Susie better. My name is John.

We're not strangers anymore. Here.

It was nice of you to buy three.

Why not? You're not bad looking.

Thank you, sir.

Not terrific either.

Well, I think you're horrid.

Here's your flower back.

Oh, I didn't mean that. I think you've got a very interesting face.

Well, I still think you're horrid.

Susie, sit down.

I want to talk to you.

What are you looking for?

Why?

People always come down here looking for something.

Something they've lost or something they've never even possessed.

Is that why you're here?

I've got what I want.

What's that?

Clerking for O 'Neill?

Paying signs for a department store?

That's just temporary. See, I've got to make money for those kids.

Because if I don't make a living, their grandfather will pull a legal snatch

before he can shout help.

Whose children are they? Mine now. They're orphans.

My brother's kids.

He married above 14th Street, and she was a swell gal, too, but that father of

hers. You know Simon Fletcher?

Fletcher Banks, Fletcher Steele, Fletcher this, Fletcher that.

He's under the impression he owns the whole world.

Well, I should think a man like that would be able to give the children every

advantage. Didn't you ever read how he's raised his own brat?

At least my kids are going to be ladies.

But if he took care of the children, you'd be able to concentrate on your

painting. And who'd keep me?

Your friends. And who'd keep my friends?

If I had your talent, I'd beg, borrow, or steal.

Oh, I'm no Rembrandt.

Say, what is this, third degree?

How about you?

Been out of work long?

Well, yes, I have, but acting jobs aren't easy to get.

Hey, John, Walkers is on the wire, and they want those signs right away.

Tom, I'll be right over.

Why don't you come over to Walkers and see my one -man exhibition?

More people see my signs than ever look at Rembrandt's.

Oh, by the way.

Here.

Oh, no, thank you. I couldn't. Why not? You haven't any money, have you?

No, but... John!

John! Oh, go ahead. I just gave O 'Neill an I .O .U. for us. You owe it to me. I

couldn't. John, dinner's ready. It is? Well, fine. Will you join us? We're

having snail's tongues and caviar. And lettuce and turnips. Come on, it's

I'll be right there.

Oh, we were shooting the rats to get people into war.

John says they should be kicked in the pants and then shot.

You understand

French?

Well, tell me, why is John suspicious of me? He must have some reason.

Plenty.

Well, don't you think it's fair to tell me and...

Oh, should I go to John about it myself?

Oh, no.

We swore we wouldn't mention it.

But how are we to know you could speak French?

Oh, won't you please tell me? Then I can straighten it out with John.

We want to be friends, don't we?

Well, you said you didn't have any money.

And John saw a roll of bills in your purse.

Oh, that.

Well, that isn't mine. It belongs to an old school chum. She just lent it to me.

It doesn't belong to me.

Why don't you go on with your game?

Wouldn't you like to play with us?

All right, kids, upstairs.

Go on, upstairs.

Upstairs. We were just having such an interesting chat.

Bye. John!

John! Mama Dito just called up. She wants you to work over there tonight.

Say, how about you? Do you want to make $3 in your dinner?

Why don't you give it to somebody who needs it?

I'd love to make $3.

What doing?

Being a bohemian.

You know, background and atmosphere for a ratty cafe.

Well, I don't think I'd look very bohemian in these clothes.

Why don't you take them off?

I'm not that bohemian.

Well, we'll soon fix that.

Get that dress out of the shop window.

All right.

Say, you know the last two girls that wore that dress got married soon

afterwards? Oh, that's all right. I'm not a bit superstitious.

You ready?

It's a little large.

Yes, I suppose it is, in spots.

Well, maybe I could fatten up in spots.

Yeah, come on.

I'm not going anywhere like this.

You need the job, don't you? Of course I do, but do I have to look like a freak

in a tent?

You may not look as hopeless as you think.

Come on.

Where are you going? What do you want to do? Wait.

Mrs. Susie is in trouble.

Well, why come to me about it? Well, you know how to fix dresses, don't you?

Oh, that.

Sure, that's easy. Here, get on the platform.

All I gotta do is take up the slack.

Well, I think it'd be better if you started right here.

Mike?

I still think you ought to work with bigger blocks.

What did he say?

He said he doesn't make enough money prize fighting to buy a bigger block.

he do that?

Did you do... Ouch!

What did he say?

He said he did it with his own two little hands.

You look too decent.

Let's see what we can do about your hair.

Hello, Mama.

Hello, darling.

Hello, Mama. Mama, this is Susie. Hello, Mama.

Hello, Susie.

Is she your sweetheart?

No. Oh, she makes such a nice atmosphere.

Oh, Mama, I have some more customers from uptown. Oui? Oh.

Come this way. I have a nice table for you.

We've had our dinner. Why don't we go someplace else?

Oh, we can't do that to Mama.

When do we eat and what?

Isn't that Suzanne Fletcher?

Michael, we must get over her.

This is no hallucination, Luke.

But her father says she went to South America to forget us.

Excuse me.

Uh, excuse me, mademoiselle.

Hiya, babe.

You want to shake a leg with me, huh?

Okay, babe.

You don't mind if he manipulates my spine for a couple of rounds, do you?

Huh?

Thanks. I'll be back before you can close your mouth.

Say, does she always give it to Jekyll and Hyde?

I don't know.

Excuse me, but, uh, haven't I... I mean, aren't you the same pleasure? Listen,

babe, you don't have to pull that old stuff of haven't we met someplace

I like you.

And I can tell you like me too, don't you?

Well, don't you?

Oh, yes, I... Okay, that's what I taught.

And say, I'll tell you what I'll do.

I'll ditch that guy and I'll meet you outside.

One of you got to be careful.

We got to sneak for it.

He's looking. Don't you dance so close to me.

Mike, something funny happened the other day.

I'm going to find out why she's down here.

Why don't you ask her? That's what I intend to do.

But first...

That's Peter Little of Mamadita's Red Vino.

After a few slugs of that, we'll have the story of her life.

Mine, too, probably.

That guy's nutty about me.

He's pulled a knife twice tonight.

See, if he thought you was trying to take me away from him, you'd wake up

tomorrow in an alley.

Only you wouldn't wake up.

Well, maybe I should better sneak now.

No, he's looking.

Don't act so nervous.

Say something to make me laugh.

Heidi, Heidi, Heidi, who?

He's coming.

All I can say, princess, if you get out of this alive, I'll be worth it.

Look what happened to Michael.

What'd you do, threaten to bump him off?

Ah, he was yellow.

That guy tried to get fresh.

He was on his way.

He said he was a friend.

How about a little slice of grape juice?

Fine. Drink to Susie's success in the village.

Salute.

Salute.

How can I tell the story of my life?

Oh, no.

Let us drink to Susie's mother and father.

Who were they?

Why, uh, Mom and Pop.

That's funny. The same name as my mother and father. Really?

Yeah. Ouch.

Oh, you are a beautiful atmosphere.

But I think I'll pay you now.

In case we have to throw you out.

Three dollars, beauty.

Three dollars a week.

This is marvelous. Now I can square myself.

Waiter. Ouch.

Waiter, will you bring me a pen and some paper?

Now can I tell the story of my life?

Oh, no. John, if you'll lend me $2, all my troubles will be over.

$2? What for?

Well, when I left Utah, I borrowed $100 from a man, and he's been threatening to

put me in jail if I don't pay him back.

Why, the rat!

Why didn't you tell me this before?

John, will you count this and see if it's $100?

Oh, I have. I mean,

it feels like $100.

Waiter. Oh, waiter!

Service around here. I didn't send for you. I sent for the waiter. Quiet!

Quiet! Mama says you all go before I make trouble for you.

Give him.

Mail this boy.

Now scram out before I scram you out. Do you realize... Maybe we'd better go.

Yes, this place is intolerable. Not at all. This thing gave.

Oh, they don't know well -mannered people when they see them. You won't get

pattern in here again.

You know, it takes a heap of courage to kiss $100 goodbye like that.

Is $100 such an awful lot of money?

Well, it would be enough to last three or four months.

Then I could paint a bit again.

Seems a shame that in having to take care of the children, you must give up

work.

Oh, what's daubing a piece of canvas compared to molding a couple of kids?

Maybe you're right.

But not for yourself.

Ah, maybe.

What would you say if I said that you were a very sweet person?

I'd say that you'd have to go an awful long way to find a sweeter one.

Now let's talk about you.

What do you think about me?

John! John, is that you?

Yes. Now you come right up to bed.

Aren't you ashamed of yourself, Susan, keeping John out this late?

Mostly sorry.

We'll talk about that in the morning.

Excuse me, Miss Fletcher. My name isn't Fletcher. Sure, I know, but your

father's worried about not having heard from you. Oh, well, I'm an orphan.

That's tough, but he says, are you all right?

Go away, will you?

Oh.

Mike. Mike.

This man's molesting me.

Why don't you molest somebody your own size?

You're my size.

Yeah, but I don't make good molesting, particularly in front of women. Oh, I

don't know.

Look.

You've got a beautiful left.

We're crazy about that left around here. Give me a hand, will you? Oh, it's been

a pleasure.

Just drop in any time. There'll always be a left hook burning in the window.

Don't bother to get up. I'll just be a moment.

Susie, you've got a break. I found a job for you. Job?

What kind?

Acting. That's what you want, isn't it?

Well, yes, of course, but I haven't had much experience.

What makes you think I'll do?

You'll do.

Honest Abe Walker presents A Wedding Night.

Come in.

Darling, my sweet.

I couldn't wait any longer.

Oh, you look lovely tonight.

It must be this lovely negligee you purchased at Walker's. Yes, and it only

$19 .75.

Including tax. Walker's always absorbed the tax.

Oh, how soft and bouncy.

The structural framework of all EasyRest mattresses has specially vitalized high

-tension springs.

EasyWay certainly is the safe and dependable way for those who sleep.

Yes, and it's air -conditioned, too.

And Mr.

Walker gave it to us on the easy payment plan.

We owe it all to honest Abe Walker.

My dear, you have around you the provocative eternal perfume of the

aura. Oh, that's, uh, that's Nuit de la Nuit, $4 .95 at Walker's.

$3 .95?

How do you like my predominantly?

Exquisite. And how do you like mine?

Adorable, beautiful.

Exclusive with walkers and washable, too.

How aren't you glad you married me?

What will Mr. Walker say to such conduct? If you don't let me go, I'll...

Hello, Susan.

Great work.

I've just had a report that he's lost his job at Walker's. He ought to be able

to crack down pretty soon.

Oh, no, not yet.

Well, he did lose his job at Walker's, but he got another one right away. Yes,

two right away.

Where? Well, I don't know where, but I know he got them and more money, too.

Susan.

Hello, Susan.

rolls of two -inch bandages.

Large or small?

Two -inch.

Who are you going to fight tonight?

Kid Doherty. Maybe you better take four rolls.

Oh, a wise guy.

A bottle of witch hazel is enough for a heavyweight.

Is the joint haunted?

What for?

Well, just to see how ducks walk.

I, um, thought I'd buy this for Katie.

She'd never forgive you if you did.

Come on, get up.

I can't.

You're looking all over for you.

Want to go to the fights with us? Well, I've never been to one before.

Well, now's your chance.

All right, I'd love to.

Now listen, take care of your hands. If you're going to break anything, that'll

be your head. Don't talk like that. You're giving me a complex.

Mike, may I kiss you? In front of my public?

What are you trying to do, soften me up before I get in the ring?

Oh, Mike.

Say bye for me.

I'll kill him.

Okay. Stop that, you fool!

What are you doing?

Would you mind shaking it with the other side of your mouth?

Thanks.

It's a great fight, isn't it?

He's a friend of mine.

He's a big palooka. Oh, yes, I think so, too.

Where's John? Has he come back yet? No, he hasn't. Well, somebody's got to fan

me, Susie. Come on, you fan me.

What's that on your face, Mike?

Blood. Blood?

Susie!

Come on, hand me that sponge.

Here. I'm all right, Susie. Honest, I am.

It's only ketchup.

Oh, I'm all right, Susie.

Hey, Malloy, get back in the ring and fight.

Will you wait a minute?

You take care of her.

A great gentleman you are.

A fine country we got.

She's my best friend's gal. I appeal to you.

With Mike disqualified for six months and Walker's putting me on the

I'm in plenty of trouble.

I certainly have made a clean sweep of all your jobs, haven't I?

Oh, it wasn't your fault. It was Mike's.

Why'd you have to hit that referee?

That other guy was too tough.

You know anything about massaging?

No.

Well, only as an amateur.

It's too bad.

They get $15 a week, and the work ought to be pleasant.

Gray hair is an asset.

Here's something in your line.

The American Art Foundation offers a prize of $2 ,500 for the best painting

New York scene.

The want ads are in the back of the paper.

John, why not give old man Fletcher a chance to help?

Why not?

You might like him when you got to know him. He'd surely be glad to do anything.

Now, listen.

Unless you can offer something constructive, lay off.

All right, then. Will you try for that prize? No.

All I'd get would be dishonorable mention.

You know you're wasting your time.

You're not cut out for a businessman.

I resent that.

There's my job. What is it?

Young man, do you meet these requirements?

Energy and determination to succeed.

Good habits.

Pleasing personality.

Can you smile in the face of adversity?

If so, your fortune is made steady income assured.

You're in the money.

Congratulations, old man.

Don't forget your old friends, John.

Katie, your parent has a job. Well, I hope he's able to keep it. I have my

doubts. My friends, this is indeed a great occasion. My heart is full. I

tell you the joy of being rid of financial worry.

Carl and Mike.

Both my good friends.

I want you to feel that if ever you're in need, you know where to come.

We know that, John.

And furthermore, I will always remember you no matter how high I climb.

Uh, could I, uh... No!

Can I interest you in a vacuum cleaner? No.

But can I interest you in a hook rug?

You don't want one of these, do you?

How do you know I don't? Nobody else seems to. You know, it's quite a

coincidence you're coming right now. I was just trying to get my old one to go,

but it's pretty rickety.

Can't you get it fixed?

Well, no.

I think it's just so old it won't go anymore.

Then I'll come in and give you a demonstration, just like you told me to.

Is it expensive?

Well, it isn't cheap.

collector comes along once every week. Well, you can demonstrate it for me. All

right, fine.

Now, while I'm plugging this thing in, I'm supposed to be giving you a lot of

information. Wait for the moment I have forgotten.

Hold on to your hat.

serving the most delicate nap, it leaves no foreign matter in its way. Is that

so? Yes.

On account of the double reverse manifold, nothing escapes it. It

picks up...

But you really must call off your dogs. But why?

I can't explain why.

Are you crazy? He has no visible means of support. My lawyers have been waiting

for this opportunity to crack down on him. But, Father, you don't understand.

All I understand is that this is the best chance we ever had to get the

children.

Please do as I ask.

Susan, you're not making sense.

I'm going to call my lawyers. All right, then. I'll tell you why you can't crack

down, as you say.

I'm going to marry John O 'Halloran.

Now call your doctor.

Anyway, it's worth $3. Yeah, what's Jack Barrymore got that I haven't got?

About $3 ,500 a week. Say, where have you been? Well, I was looking for a job.

Mike, you look kind of tired. Why don't you go upstairs and go to bed?

I'm not sleepy. There used to be some crack about two being company. Just a

of radical propaganda.

Mike, are you going to force me to be subtle?

John, darling, will you do me a big favor?

Why, certainly, little girl, certainly.

How's that?

Oh, no, John.

A much bigger favor than that. Bigger and better favor. John, will you marry

Where have you been all afternoon?

In a library, reading books, or standing up against a bar?

John, listen. The most important thing is for you to paint.

Important? To whom? To everybody.

To you, to me, and... And the great, hungry, waiting world.

Well, what do you suggest I do about it? Marry me.

And that would solve the whole problem of eating and painting? Yes.

You certainly have it over Houdini.

Would he be asking too much if he let me in on the trick?

Oh, this might knock the daylights out of everything for us, but... Hey, John,

Carl's up in your room again.

Is he drunk? He ain't sober.

He'll wake the children. I'll throw him out on his ass.

Yea, all that it inherits shall dissolve, and leave not a rat behind.

We are such stuff as dreams are made of.

You said it.

And our little life is rounded with a sleep.

Carl, what's going on here?

They shot you, John.

They shot you when your back was turned.

Are you John O 'Halloran? Yes, what's it to you?

I hate to do this. You've been a perfect host.

I've had a lovely time, but I must do my duty.

What's this?

It's a summons.

Where are the kids?

The Juvenile Aid Society took them.

I tried to stop him, John, but I couldn't. It was no good.

Just no good.

Well, I had a perfectly lovely time.

Good night, folks.

Good night, Miss Fletcher.

John, that's what I wanted.

Hello, Susan.

You're right, Susie. The kids will be better off with you.

It isn't only that, Mike. It's John.

He's got to have a chance to work.

If he weren't so pig -headed, he'd see it.

Order, please, order.

Now, Major, if you please, I think we'd like to talk to John.

John, is it true that you never went to school?

Yes. John said it wasn't necessary.

He said he went to school and college and didn't learn anything.

And he tried to pass this lack of knowledge on to you.

Pardon me, a few questions.

Intelligence test.

You know, IQ.

Now, my dear, what is it that goes quack, quack and lays an egg?

Joe Penner.

Now, my dear.

Can you tell me, are you a little boy or are you a little girl?

Don't be a dope.

Boy, is she dumb.

Do you happen to know who the eighth president of the United States was?

John says it's silly to memorize a lot of unimportant facts.

Oh, so John doesn't think the presidents of the United States are important.

Aren't you ashamed of yourself poisoning the minds of our future citizens?

You're not really interested in the non -attendance of school.

All you're sore about is you haven't flung them into a mole. Turned them out

like half the other little beggars in this country.

If you please. They've got to be all alike.

Mole number four for Joan, mole number seven for Katie.

Oh.

Mr. Chairman, I'm sure Dr. Mallory will substantiate the fact that these

children have been subjected to every possible undesirable influence.

I should like to oblige, Mrs. Bell -Rivington. Both as a psychiatrist and a

medical examiner, I find Katie and Joan entirely normal, perhaps even a little

above normal.

Their health, both of body and mind, is excellent.

For my part, I see no reason why they should be separated from Mr. O

And I know some of my colleagues will agree wholeheartedly with me. I'm afraid

the findings of the doctor strike a new note.

Perhaps it would be better to postpone the decision pending further

deliberation. No, no.

Mr. Chairman, may I ask Joan a few questions?

Certainly, Miss Fletcher. Thank you.

Joan, isn't it true that when we first met and several times since then, you

Katie have had to take care of a drunken man?

Drunken man?

It was only Carl.

He's harmless, sir. You see, he lost his wife and it makes him very sad.

No one blames him.

Does this happen very often?

Disgraceful, a child of that age.

If it weren't for dames like you, I'd have been on the wagon a long time ago.

Come on, John. Can't you see how they've packed the court on you?

You've as much chance of retaining those kids as a snowball... Remove that man.

Don't worry, I'll remove him. If you need me, John, I'll be over at

Saloon.

I've taken care of those kids up to now, and I can take care of them in the

future. You can't take care of them. You haven't any job. You're lying. You know

I've got a job. I'm selling vacuum cleaners. How many have you sold?

I'm in no position to divulge trade secrets.

Ladies and gentlemen, the chief interests of these children demand that

taken from this man.

He's incapable of supporting them. Look here, I don't know much about the

legalities of this case, but you've no moral right to take them away from me.

Joan, isn't it true that you and Katie often went hungry?

Joan, answer me.

Joan, Miss Fletcher has asked you a question.

We're not talking.

Proper environment would cure that type of impudence.

Go ahead, Joan. The sooner you answer their questions, the sooner we get out

here. Did you go hungry?

Well, not very often.

You see, they did.

But John was hungry, too. Twice as hungry. He has so much more to feed.

What difference does that make? They don't look undernourished, do they? Why,

even your own doctor said they look perfectly healthy.

My sister's children are as close to me as they are to him. Is there any reason

why they should go hungry just because he suddenly refuses to accept help?

Do you want to go live with that pompous old walrus?

I'm afraid, my dear, that the choice isn't yours to make.

No, kids.

This is one of those nice setups where kind -hearted people do lovely things

your own good.

We're sorry you're taking this attitude, Mr. O 'Halloran.

We'd like these things to be as friendly as possible.

Friendly? Just what is the penalty for assault and battery in this state? No,

we'd have no more of that, Mr. O 'Halloran.

You're simply proving by your actions that you're not a fit guardian for these

children.

I think my colleagues will agree with me that the guardianship of the children

should be awarded to Mr. Fletcher.

Why, if you want a bunch of old women, I'd... Silence!

No, Johnny! Johnny!

Johnny! I want to go with Johnny! Johnny! Johnny!

Did you all have a nice...

It was exercise.

Thank you, Aunt Susan, for coming with us. Yes, thank you.

Look what I've got for you.

Aren't they nice?

Real thoroughbreds. John says mozzarella cats make the best pets.

Oh, so John's an authority on dogs, too.

John is an authority on almost everything.

And very nice about it, too.

I'm sorry, Susan.

I'm afraid I've not been very clever about all this.

You know he's only trying to get on the right side of us.

I know, but I could love that little dog an awful lot.

Joan, Katie, I want you to pack your bags and I'll have Mike come and take

back to John.

You mean we can go back for good?

Yes, for good.

There's no denying it, Joan. She is suffering.

Crocodile tears.

I think at least we should say goodbye to her.

I'll be glad to say goodbye.

I think maybe we should forgive her, too.

All right, but not too much.

Aunt Susan, we came to say goodbye to you.

And that ain't all.

We came to forgive you, too.

Thank you.

And I'm... I'm sorry that we... Are you crying just because we're going?

the children are going to stay.

Yes. We're beginning to enjoy it here.

So you finally managed to turn them against John.

Poison their minds. Bribe them. Well, you're not going to get away with it.

going to take them back to him. No, Carl. We decided to leave John alone so

could do his painting.

Painting?

Why, he hasn't even touched a brush since you all left.

He hasn't.

Do you think a man can paint without his heart?

Yes, I think he can.

With the proper inducements.

Boys, will you commit a little murder for me tonight?

It'll be a pleasure, Miss Fletcher. And what is the nature of this murder?

Now, look.

Hello, Mama.

Good evening, Miss Fletcher.

John.

Hello, John.

I'm making up my books, Miss Fletcher, and I'd like to settle this matter. A

matter of, uh...

$12 .93.

There'll be seven cents change.

Thank you, miss. Wait there while I go with you. I want you to come with me.

I never go slumming. We need you at home.

Joan's ill.

Joan ill?

Desperately. What's the matter with her? Come on with me. I've got the car. I

might have known this would happen.

I'm so nervous. Will you drive? All right.

You better be careful. We're coming into Fletcherville. They have a speed trap

here. Thought you owned Fletcherville. Only up to 30 miles an hour.

What do they want us for?

We're doing 30.

I'm sure I don't know.

What's the matter, son? Late for school?

Now, look here, officer. We're in a hurry. Yes, we noticed that. What do you

mean you noticed that? I was only doing 30 miles an hour, wasn't I, Susan?

Well, I told you to slow down.

But I did. I slowed down. I slowed down to 30 miles an hour. Look, mister, I can

add and subtract. You were doing 78.

What do you mean, 78?

Yes, and that's a $10 fine on this road. Say, what is this?

Where's your driver's license?

Why, I... Well, she has one.

Oh, no, I haven't. No driver's license?

That's a second offense. That's ten bucks more.

Susan, will you give these men $20 and $5 for themselves and let's get out of

here? Right, Brea!

Well, that's 50 bucks more.

Say, you don't suppose he's drunk, do you?

Well, I don't know, but we'll find out.

Walk.

All right, I will.

There you are. What did I tell you? You can't even walk.

What do you mean I can't even walk?

Oh, resisting arrest, huh? Why, I haven't had a drink since I don't know

can't even remember the taste of it. What do you mean I've got to stay in

six months? Ends my order. Who gave them to you?

Me.

Get in there.

Why, it's outrageous. Six months for speeding?

Oh, so you admit you were speeding. No, I wasn't.

Well, you've got six months to make up your mind.

Supposing I admitted I was speeding.

You'd get another month for perjury.

I want a lawyer. Get me a lawyer.

Good evening, Miss Fletcher.

Hello.

John! Katie!

I thought you said John was ill.

Oh, she's much better now.

We just dropped in to say hello.

Hello. What's the matter?

Aren't you going to kiss me?

We have a lot of things to talk over first.

Well, children, have you seen enough of him?

Almost. This is a fine trick.

Embarrassing me in front of my children.

Turning them against me. We turned ourselves when we found out about you.

One more crack like that and I'll wring your neck.

You mean you would if you could.

Don't get too close, darling. It's a very savage beast.

We've really come here to deliver a kind of ultimatum. Carl!

Mike!

Carl! Mike! Open this gate.

What for?

So that I can get out, you ape.

There's only one way to get out. At a meeting of your best friends. Friends?

mean hoodlums.

And probably your very best enemies. We decided to keep you here until you paint

a picture for that contest.

Huh? It was a little difficult to convince Carl, but he finally gave in.

picture? Here?

Why not?

You have a lovely north side and clear solitude.

I almost envy you myself.

Just a moment. There's one more clause. Until you finish the picture, you get

nothing to eat or drink.

So long.

What do you want?

How about a little breakfast?

No, thanks. I've just had my breakfast.

Couldn't you sneak me a little sandwich?

I could, but I won't.

Constable! Constable!

Now what do you want?

Tell them I've finished.

Hey, folks, he's finished.

Where?

Promise I can have something to eat and drink?

Water. Then if we like it, a meal.

I don't know whether you're going to like this.

Carl! Mike, look! It's good!

Aren't you mad?

Mad? It's marvelous.

It's grand.

Wait a minute.

Carl, get in the car and drive into New York and show this to David Larimore.

He'll be crazy about it.

That's a swell idea.

That's just the sort of thing the Manhattner would publish.

That's a great piece of work, John. I didn't know you could do caricature.

Let me out of here.

Never. I'll split them a cord of wood for this, and that's all the hospitality

of theirs I'll accept.

No favors granted and none received.

Well, won't you please forgive me?

You and Katie? Yes, I'll forgive you. Didn't know what you were doing.

We did, too.

Sit down.

Aunt Susan, why don't you ask him to forgive you, too?

I couldn't, Katie.

It isn't only pride.

It's just...

Susie, I'm with Mr. Larimore now.

Talk to him.

Hello, Miss Fletcher. Did you see the picture? Did you like it?

Like it? Well, it's marvelous.

He thinks it's marvelous.

Mr. Larimore wants to buy it.

Don't you, Mr. Larimore?

Oh, yes. I'll give you a contract for more.

Oh, that's fine. I was sure you would.

Jim, Jim, come in the pool.

They want to buy your picture.

Oh, so they want to buy my picture, eh?

Well, I don't know if I want to sell it. What do you think about that?

It's me, Susie. Who are you?

That's O 'Halloran. He's only the artist.

Who are you?

I'm David Larimore.

David Larimore?

I'm glad to see you. I mean, hear you. How are you, anyway?

Never mind that. How much will I give you for the picture?

Young man, I like your picture. I'll give you $250 for it.

$250? All right, $300.

Fine, it's yours.

Don't be a sucker, John. It's worth $1 ,000 if I know anything about art. Oh,

pay no attention to her, Mr. Larimore. She's batty.

Listen, Susie, will you please be quiet and keep out of this? Remember the

flute? Well, I tell you what. Let's make it 400.

John, if you take a cent less than 500, you're giving it away. Mr. Laramore,

you're taking an unfair advantage.

I'm not taking advantage of him. Young man, you better take the 400.

It's all right with me.

But not with me. If it's worth anything, it's worth 500.

All right, I'll give you the 500.

Sold! Oh, no, you don't.

900 is our rock -bottom price. Why, that's ridiculous.

It's not worth any more than 500.

That's... the trouble with you capitalists. Crushing the existence out

man that makes it possible for you to exist.

Live and let live.

Hey, Susie, will you keep out of this? She was only kidding, Mr. Larimore.

900 is our price, Mr. Larimore.

It's cheap at 900.

Why that picture of the old man's a scream?

Oh, so you think it's funny, do you?

I don't want that picture sold, John. I'll give you the 900.

Who are you?

That's my father.

All right, Mr. Fletcher, it's a deal.

Not by me. Who'll give a thousand?

All right, a thousand. Sold.

Sold! Oh, John, will you please be quiet and let me handle this? You know you're

a terrible businessman.

I don't care, I don't care.

Well, I think it's up to Father. We ought to give him a chance to bid

I want that picture at any price.

Atta boy, Grandpa!

All right, you fight it out with Mr. Larimer.

Hey, John, are you still mad at me?

Sure, and I've got to stay mad at you. Look what it's doing for me.

You know, that's what was wrong with me. I needed to be mad at somebody.

I resent that.

Please, don't hang up.

You remember I once told you that people came below 14th Street looking for

something?

Well, now I've come above 14th Street looking for something.

Something I've lost.

John, where are you? In the drawing room.

I'll be right up. I'll be right down. All right, it's mine for $1 ,500.

Boy, you should see what I see.

Oh, boy, I can't.