Original subtitles

I can't keep my hands off the light.

Don't treat me like I'm a child. I know exactly what I want.

He's so disgusting.

I bet he does.

I do miss having somebody to cook for.

We can cook for you.

Let's take it as done. Is there any chance you could bring a pair of nail

scissors with you?

I quite fancy the idea of somewhere quieter.

Not London, somewhere good to bring up a family.

He's my husband.

People put up.

Married again.

He needs to leave.

I've already abandoned him once when I left his mother. I'm not going to

him again. If he wasn't targeting my daughter for sex, then we wouldn't be in

this situation.

Mum, you know what? I bet I'm the only 15 -year -old in the world who has to

sleep in the same bed as her mother.

She's got a point, you know.

It's been almost a week. It's ridiculous.

I miss you.

No, Tyler.

Better get ready for the design competition.

If you want to get back into our bed, you throw Justin out of that place at

Brocklehurst.

Sue,

creative

or serious and assertive?

Simon, they're only going to see your face on screen. You could do it naked.

Yeah, but how you dress affects performance, and I want to feel the

I? You'll be brilliant as always.

What time's your interview?

Ten o 'clock. I've got a free period.

Well, take them with you and put it on just before.

Are you worried about Vaughan finding out?

I don't want to jinx it.

It's going to be the fresh start we're looking for.

Fine, fine.

It's still going on.

I know it is. Maybe not at home, but it's still going on. We are doing all we

can. Make that call, please.

Just a little tip. Take your steak out of the fridge 20 minutes before you're

going to cook it.

Hey, you little swat.

Rhiannon, you won't be taking the mickey when you taste this bad boy.

Exactly.

Everyone knows old people don't even eat a lot, do they? So the rest is ours.

Darren, that's not exactly the spirit of the helpline.

I'm going to be gagging if I have to cut her tries.

Rhiannon, stop.

Right, OK, you take your pan, put it on the heat and whack it up, way up, right?

Hot enough to boil a monkey's bum.

Then you plop it in the pan, two and a half minutes one side, flip it, two and

half minutes the other. No more.

Less if you want it mooing.

Monkey's bum.

Yeah. You plop in the pan.

Something about mooing.

I've got it, Maggie.

Good. Right, well, I will drop you around there later. Make sure it's all

There's no need.

Grace is harmless.

Not unless she's wearing, like, one of them latex masks. Imagine that.

Then we step inside and she whips it off to reveal the face of a sadistic

killer. And she wants to chop us up and fry us like that steak.

If you could give us a lift in, Maggie.

Julian, hello.

Yeah, I'm sorry to keep pushing, but...

Really?

Well, that's fantastic.

Thank you.

Yeah.

Well, I know Justin. I'm sure he'll be fine once he's made a few friends.

OK. Well, let's talk later. Yeah. Thank you. Bye.

That's brilliant news. Thank you.

This is the right thing for all of us.

I know you feel guilty.

Let's not go there.

But Brocklehurst is a fantastic school and it's only a couple of hours away.

This could be the making of him.

School time.

OK, listen up, everybody.

Welcome to the Hoodie of the Future design competition.

Each pair is going to line up by the door, and when I give the signal, you'll

come up here, one person will pitch and the other person will model, and show

Mrs Walk... Mummy.

..why you think your hoodie design should win the prize.

What is it? A two -rounder wonka factory?

The winning design will feature in the Walk catalogue, and a run of 100 will be

made up at their factory.

And more if they sell out.

I think we all agree it's a very generous offer.

Slave labour, more like.

Well, all the proceeds will go to a charity of our choice.

Good luck.

Let's not bother even doing it.

I've got a bit of an idea.

How are you feeling?

I'm fine. Stop fucking.

Hiya. Hi.

Hello.

Simon's just about to video call his mother in Wales. She wants to show him

new... Kitchen tile.

She put them up herself.

Did the grating and everything.

Yeah, she's funny like that, my mum.

Right, well, I just came to borrow.

Mark a pen.

That's all right. All right, calm down.

Good morning.

Dad.

More make -up.

It's fine. I've done this loads of times before.

You won't even be able to see it on camera. Look up.

Okay.

Smile.

Darren, you are really photogenic.

Am I?

With a bug on your head. No, I'm being serious. Come and see.

I'm all right.

I get a good enough fuel for my breakfast every morning.

Oh, my God.

What?

That one. Actually, a lot.

Yes.

Dad wants the word.

Why? I didn't say, but he's in his office. They weren't messing about.

Kevin.

The police called earlier. I hear you've been let off for the warning.

Oh, yeah, that's a massive relief.

Computer crime.

That's quite serious.

You don't need me to tell you how lucky you've been.

Yeah, yeah, I know.

Also, I wanted to apologise to you personally.

What do you want?

Leave.

Door.

What do I do now? Breathe?

You're not going to like this, but I'm going to tell you anyway. I've been

talking to Julian Huxtable.

He's an old friend of mine and headteacher at Brocklehurst, which is a

progressive boarding school with an excellent academic reputation. You are

joking me.

I overheard you and Ali talking, plotting to get rid of me, and now

actually going through with it. We are trying to do the best for everyone.

For her, you mean?

If by her you mean Ali, at least do her the courtesy of using her name.

She's been very upset since she found out about you and Tiffany. And what

me? I'm not, I suppose.

You brought it on yourself.

I honestly thought you were going to stand up to her, Dad.

Where is this school?

Aberdeen.

It's only a couple of hours on the train.

Julian has put himself out on a limb by taking you so late in the academic year.

Oh, mate's rates then, is it?

So how come you can afford to pay for this, but you can't pay for Mum's

We are very much hoping that the sale on Ali's house is about to go through.

They can take you on Monday.

We'll take you up on Saturday, get you settled in, get you your uniform and

kit. We'll even buy you a laptop. I mean, there you go. I mean, it's all

planned. It's great.

Shame I'm not going.

Justin, you've only got a couple of terms to complete.

This is a fantastic school where you have a very good chance of getting the

grades you need. The only way you're going to get me to that school, Dad, is

you drug me first.

Knowing Ali, she's probably already bought the tranquiliser, Dad.

Are they OK?

Yeah.

You and Simon were being a bit weird earlier on.

Were we?

Ooh, very dapper, Simon.

Have you and Sue got a hot date later, or is it just for my benefit?

Nothing wrong with making an extra effort occasionally, Christine.

My doing, I'm afraid. We went on a shopping spree at the weekend, didn't

marital bliss.

You'll be wearing matching anoraks, Nick.

They want rid of me.

What? Who?

Who do you think?

Sending me off to some school in Aberdeen.

They can't do that.

They can.

Dad's already sorted it.

Just tell them you don't want to go.

I have.

It doesn't make a difference.

I'll talk to my mum.

It's her idea.

She's not a monster.

No, I know she's not, and I know she just cares about you.

And I know that I'm just the evil stepson that's taking you away from her.

What are we going to do?

I don't know.

Tiffany, could you give me a hand with this?

Justin says this Barden School thing is your idea.

Well, it is.

And it's not just an idea.

It's all arranged.

You don't even agree with him. You said yourself that parents that send their

kids to Barden School never wanted to be parents in the first place.

Well, first of all, he's not a kid.

And second of all... We'll be sensible. We'll keep our distance. I just don't

trust him. What have you got against him? You've never been like this with

other boyfriend.

You weren't sleeping with your other boyfriends, were you?

Justin's got a real nasty streak.

Maybe Justin isn't in this relationship for the right reasons.

It's possible that he's just using it to cause trouble for me and Vaughan. So

what are you trying to say? Well, it's a complicated situation. I love him and

he loves me. Okay.

Okay. Well, if that's true, then he'll wait for you, won't he?

Especially like this one, the way the light hits your cheekbones.

You look like you need a poo.

You know, my mum's been talking about adding edge to our catalogue. I think

you'd be perfect.

Edge?

Darren's about as edgy as a guinea pig.

Do you mean modelling?

Well, yeah, why not?

I never really thought about it.

Darren, she's winding you up.

I'm not, I swear. Look, I'll call her right now.

You can't just interrupt.

Why aren't you in class?

I've got something to say.

I've changed my mind.

I'll go to your school.

Just like that?

I've been thinking about it.

But you were dead against it earlier.

I know, but, um, I spoke to Tiff and she convinced me it was a good idea.

When?

Um, just now.

What did she say?

I don't know, just it's not that big a deal.

She's sensible, doesn't fly off the handle like me.

So you just changed your mind?

Isn't it enough that I said I'll go? What's with the interrogation?

Look, if I knuckle down, I can get into St Andrews. And I mean, I'll still be

back for the holidays, right?

Of course.

And a new laptop does sound pretty cool.

Laptop? Yeah, I said we could probably stretch to one.

So you really are okay with this?

Yeah. Okay.

Back to class.

Quite a turnaround.

The Mormon religion was founded by a farmer called Joseph Smith who claimed

angel gave him golden plates which he translated into the Book of Mormon.

Not everyone was enamored by Mr. Smith, and in 1832, the poor man was tarred and

feathered by locals. Now, why do you think that happened? Why do you think

Mormons inspired such hostility?

Any ideas, anyone?

Finally, thank you for raising your head above the apathetic parapet of your

fellow classmates.

Tiffany, please illuminate us. Why do you think the Mormons were handed out of

town?

Actually, Miss, I need the loo.

Oh.

Now, come on.

They totally fell for it. So what's the plan?

We're going away.

Where? London.

My mate Andy's always up for visitors, so we'll go there.

Andy... Camden Andy.

He's got a sofa bed, so, you know, it'll be fine.

Look, I know this is a lot to take in, but this is all going to work out.

We've finally got the chance to start a new life and finally be together. Hang

on. We're going for good?

Yeah.

What are we going to do about money? I'll get a job.

I mean, there's always bar work and I'm nearly 18.

What about school and my exams? We'll enrol you into a new school, Tiff. But

underage. They won't let me without a parent's signature.

I thought you loved me, Tiff.

I do.

It's just there was no sudden.

Mum is going to be devastated. I'm going to miss her so much.

Seriously?

After she planned this whole thing to shove me up to Aberdeen? And what about

mum, Tiff?

My dad's just left her an emotional wreck.

Does she deserve it?

I miss her too, you know.

I'm sorry.

Look, if we're that serious, then surely we can stand a few months apart.

What, is that what your mum told you?

Oh, let me guess, she told you that I don't love you too, right?

But don't listen to her.

What will you have?

It's special.

I mean, nobody gets me like you do.

Please, Tiff.

Don't give up on me.

So, meet me at the gates.

I'm getting a good lunch, okay?

Then we'll go home, pack, and get the train to London.

We've both got the next period free. My mum's studio's just down the road. If we

go after class, she might say yes.

Yes to what?

Darren being in the autumn -winter walk catalogue. As if your mum's going to

agree to that.

I know how the industry works.

She trusts my judgement.

Well, he's not interested.

Are you, Darren?

I don't know.

Sounds all right if I get paid.

Of course you do.

So, what do you think?

He can't. He's busy.

Am I?

Yeah. Shopping for Grace's mail.

Can't you do it?

I'm sure you're more than capable for picking a bag of chips out of the frozen

section, Rhiannon.

Well, it's a steak, actually, and we've saved up.

Well, as long as your design's ready.

Yep, they are. Then I don't see why not.

Justin.

I can't send you to Aberdeen. It's not fair. It's cool.

We've talked about it and I'm okay with it.

I don't understand why you're not angry.

It's complicated.

That's what people say when they're just afraid to tell the truth.

This whole thing's Tiffany's fault.

Why did you have to start something up today? Look, she's just caught in the

middle of it just like the rest of us. Now, don't blame her.

That's it.

Just off.

Gone.

I'd take you with me if I could, OK? It doesn't mean I don't care about you.

And I'm always at the end of the phone, all right?

Whatever.

Dress it up how you like. You're still leaving me.

Okay, well, thank you for the opportunity, and I'll see you tomorrow.

Yeah. Bye.

What was all that about before?

I promise I wouldn't say anything.

Promise do.

It was a video conference for a new job. I think I've really impressed them.

Yeah, it was Sue's idea. She's got a bee in her bonnet about moving away.

Why?

Maybe it'd be good for us, you know? New start, new challenges, the B word.

Baby, Hector, baby.

I don't expect you to understand, but it's what we both want, you know? We

to move on to the next level.

Don't tell Steve you know anything.

She's gone all secret service on me. Probably have you assassinated.

Now you've all had a chance to read and digest Vanity Fair, in your groups, I

would like to discuss the theme of fate.

Do the characters' actions control their destinies, or are they mere puppets at

the hands of fate?

Now, I know you like to get passionate about your literature, but please keep

the volumes with dull roar.

Thank you.

See, I don't think it is fake.

Because Becky Sharp hopefully gets what's coming to her. You can't act like

and get away with it. Yeah, but there's Anna too. Yeah, she's a saint, but she

suffers just as much.

Mate, you do know we aren't all meant to be doing this.

It's not fair you just cop out.

Well, that's not fair.

That's the point.

Who are you texting?

No one.

Take a minute.

Could you not just leave her alone for one day? Can we just all focus on Becky

Sharp? Yeah, Floyd.

Can we all just focus on Becky Sharp?

About the only girl you can get between the sheets.

Phone, please.

I'm not messing around, Justin. Phone, now.

Now, Justin, I'm not messing around.

No.

No?

Would you like a moment to revise that answer before things get serious?

Not really.

It's my last day at this crappy school, so... How come?

Ask your lovely mother.

Well, even if that is true, I can still make today very unpleasant.

If you don't do what I say.

All right.

Whatever.

Just a text, no big deal.

Leo Fitzgerald.

Why aren't you in class?

Can't be that bad.

Yeah, whatever.

Do you want to talk about it?

Dad's sending Jack into a boarding school.

Don't worry about me, I'm all right.

What are you doing after school?

Stay behind, please, Justin.

Can I have my phone? I need it.

This might be your last day, but until quarter past three, you're on my watch,

and I am not happy with how you behaved in my class.

Okay, what time is it now, exactly?

12 .35.

Sorry. What? I've apologised. What else do I need to do?

You clearly have a problem with authority, but you're going to have to

it wherever you end up in.

I could go and get your dad.

You could have this conversation with him.

OK.

I was out of order before.

I was just trying to sort out everything before they made me go.

Make you go?

Didn't you see Floyd's face earlier?

I didn't choose to live with them.

I didn't choose any of this.

It was my dad's decision, but somehow it's always my fault. I'm always the bad

guy. It's always me.

At least I'll be rid of them when I'm in London.

What, in London?

Uh, boarding school.

My dad's sending me to boarding school.

See?

Even you think it's bad.

It's like they just want to get rid of me.

Like I'm a problem that just needs to be solved.

Does your dad know you feel like that?

I don't know.

No.

It's too late to say anything now, anyway.

Then he's your dad. He would want to know how you feel.

Give him another chance.

I'm sorry.

for mouthing off at you earlier miss.

I honestly didn't mean to take it out on you.

These things happen.

I'm glad you were honest with me.

Haven't you forgotten something?

You're a good teacher miss.

Good luck Justin.

Thanks.

and 50 cents about the school.

I know it must have been tough.

And I know it's going to be hard to say goodbye to him.

But trust me, six months from now, you're going to look back and wonder

the fuss was about.

What if everything's changed by then?

I'm your mum, okay? And I'm going to be there picking up the pieces for you for

as long as it takes.

Okay?

I love you more than anything in the world.

I love you too, Mum.

Hey!

So you're running away then?

Brave.

I'm sorry if you think I'm a coward, but actually this is the hardest decision

I've ever had to make.

Then why do it?

Because this isn't real. It's an affair. It's a sex.

You don't mean that.

I know you don't. You've got to give me a chance.

I hate that. I'm sorry. I just can't do this.

Well, I've moved away. That is it.

I don't want to ever see you again.

It's so bad.

She's going to be heartbroken.

Look, it's not as if you're not going to see her again.

Tiff, you just need to wait for things to settle down. As soon as I realise how

serious we are, we can come back.

Do you promise?

Yes, I promise. Now, come on.

OK, that's great.

Yeah, yeah, just like that.

Yeah, more of that. Perfect.

He looks amazing on camera.

What's she doing?

I've told her three times not to use that girl.

Why do the models have to be so skinny?

Makes the clothes look good.

Yeah, right.

And the metal beans, maybe.

But in real life, they just look half -starved.

I'd much rather look like me.

If you've got something to put in the clothes.

I'm sorry. I said she didn't have to come.

They don't even look like the pictures anyway.

Not like that one.

She probably woke up with a massive spot on her chin, eye bags big enough to

carry her shopping, and wobbly bits all over the place.

But we don't get to see those, do we?

They airbrush them all out.

This whole thing is just a massive con to make the rest of us feel rubbish. And

in reality, no one ever looks at that anyway.

She been to the talk show, you?

Ignore her. She knows nothing about the fashion industry.

Phil, what do you think?

About Darren?

I'm sorry, sweetheart. I'm afraid you're not quite right for us at the moment.

Perhaps next year.

It's lovely to meet you, though.

You haven't even looked at my photographs.

But you are really quite interesting.

Me?

Have you ever thought of modelling?

You are having a laugh.

I'm serious.

Of course you are.

I've been toying with the idea of a plus -size range for a while now.

And with your fire and passion, I think you'll make a great new walk, girl.

Come on, get packing.

How will we get into the station?

I thought we'd hitchhike, save a bit of money.

That's dangerous.

Don't back down on me now.

I need you.

Come on.

Have you called your friend in London?

I'll do it now.

You haven't even done that yet.

It's not a problem.

It's cool.

Andy. Hello mate, it's Justin.

Yeah, good.

Listen, um, have you still got that outside the bed?

Sweet. Can I use it tonight?

No, just for a couple of nights, a week tops.

But you said that if I ever needed... Okay.

No worries.

He said no.

No? No, it's all sorted.

Come on, get packing.

The point is, size zero is unrealistic.

We represent real girls with gorgeous curves.

Think Best Ditto.

Crystal Ren.

Sophie Dahl. He's actually really thin now.

Exactly. We need more positive role models.

So what do you say?

What do you think, Darren?

I don't know.

Why are you going to be doing stuff today? Because don't forget, we've got

cook Gracie's dinner later.

You mean I've got to cook Gracie's dinner?

I'll tell you what, I'll book the studio for tomorrow after school. We'll do

some test shots.

All right, sounds good.

I'll definitely do it.

Big week for you guys with Justin, really.

Oh, no one told you?

No, Justin did, actually.

He seems quite conflicted about the whole thing.

Well, actually, he's coming round to the idea now.

Not when I spoke to him half an hour ago.

Why, what did he say?

Um, something about feeling like the scapegoat of the family, that his dad

doesn't listen to him.

Hmm. Well, thanks for the heads up, but I think we've got it covered.

Yeah, of course you do.

Listen, I know how hard it is to get perspective when you're in the middle of

situation, and once he's in London, it might be too late to repair any damage.

Aberdeen.

The school's in Aberdeen.

He definitely said London.

Maybe I've got that wrong.

Floyd, have you seen your sister?

No. Justin?

No, not in the class.

Why, but...

Justin, my phone.

We've got to go.

Tiffany?

Justin?

Are you there?

Please pick up, Tiff. I'm not hot with you. I just want to talk to you.

Come on.

Maybe we should think about this.

Look, Tiff, I know this is a big change, but you'll be with me, OK?

Come on. I can't find my trainers.

Do you need them?

Yeah.

Hurry up then.

Got them?

No, they're not in here.

Huh?

I'll check downstairs.

Who was it that said they wouldn't get out of bed for less than ten grand?

Oh, was it underground?

She was a supermodel.

Catalogue modelling's a little different.

Oh, someone's missing the limelight.

Bet you're dead. You've been seen with a model.

I'm bothered what you look like.

Oh, thanks.

You know what I mean.

Do I?

Sorry. Whoa, where are you going, mate? It's not time for the competition.

Start without me. It won't be long.

Get in the car, Tiffany.

Mum! Don't listen to her.

Get in the car. I'm sorry, I can't. Not now. Tiff!

How did you know where we were? I worked it out.

Get in the car, we're going back to school. Tiff! No, Tiff, come with me.

Now!

Not you.

I don't want you anywhere near her.

I know how thrilled Ali's been to collaborate with you on this. The

have been working round the clock on the designs.

Great. When can I see them? Well, Ali should be meeting us at my office.

We've got a problem.

Your guest is here. I'm really sorry. They can't wait.

Sonia, could you show Mrs. Walk to the design competition, please?

This had better be good.

He bulldozed her into running away.

This tantamount's a kidnap. It wasn't like that, though, Mum.

Then why were you texting me? I didn't know what else to do.

You thought I'd just edit that?

Yeah, I'm not sure that's really the issue right now, Tiff. Take your stuff,

to the library, wait.

Where is he now?

I don't know. I left him there.

He's not a kid. He'll be fine.

Where are you going?

You're playing right into his hands, you know.

Okay, settle down, everybody.

Shh, shh, shh.

Okay, apologies for the late start. First of all, I'd like to introduce

designer Amelia Watt.

What are you doing?

Nothing. I can't think with your mouth. They look well -weared.

Stop messing about.

I will be just outside.

I've just spoken to the head who interviewed me. He was really positive

their thumb down to the last tooth.

I've got to go down to Wales tonight to meet them all in person tomorrow

morning. Wow, that's great.

What's the matter?

This is what you wanted.

It is.

It's happening so quick.

Oh, for God's sake, Sue. You're the one who's pushed for this.

You could at least say well done.

I'm sorry. You're right.

It's just I didn't get much sleep last night.

Right, well, I've got to go home and pack.

I'll drive down tonight to sleep with my folks.

Well, give them my love.

I am proud of you.

You know what you need?

You need a nice bath and an early night.

I'll take it for a slap up meal when I get back tomorrow, yeah?

Sounds lovely.

If this goes to plan, we could be starting a new life in Wales in a month.

Good luck.

Good luck.

The hoodie is reversible, with reflective panels on one side for use

cycling in the dark, while the other side has a more dressy feel.

meaning the garment works as well while relaxing socially with friends.

Finally, we feel the hood gives it a more elusive quality, something not

seen in sportswear design.

What's elusive mean, Darren?

Like, um, something like hardware.

That's my presentation, Darren.

Okay, thank you, Gabriella and Darren. Well done.

Two prepared.

Why don't you take a seat, I will make us a brew and then we can go through the

drill.

Better still, learn on the job.

Come on, come on, it's not going to bite you.

Waterloo Road, Helping Hands, Community Hotline, how can I help you?

Go to.

She wants to know if Darren and Rhiannon are still cooking for her tonight.

Tell her they're looking forward to it.

Yes, of course. They can't wait.

She

wants

me to remind Darren to bring his scissors.

Apparently he's cutting her toenails.

I don't have to do that, do I?

No.

Wolfie Road Helping Hands Community Hotline. You can use it to listen to

through the doorchains.

And it also has a handy integrated light for reading, which turns on.

Ah! Sorry, sorry.

Well, it's a work in progress, and it's nothing that we can't overcome.

Thanks.

It's for the brides that don't want to be girly on their big day. I mean, why

would you want to wear a corset if you can wear a comfy hoodie?

Lift the hood.

Doesn't he look beautiful?

That's it, babe.

Right, well done.

We have named our design the Zorro hoodie.

As you can see, it is very handy for...

the times you'd rather not be identified.

And the deep pockets mean you can store items such as fruit.

Miss, aren't you going to say something?

Why don't you tell us about the fabric, Chesney, and why you chose it?

Absolutely.

The fabric is breathable and absorbent.

Thank you, girls.

A round of applause, everyone.

Hector.

I got down to the last two for that job. I'm off to Wales. I got in here the

first day. Oh, wow.

That's really happening then.

Could be. I got a really good feeling about it.

Everyone's giving me a great reference, which is cool, because I thought you

might be funny about it, you know, giving a short notice. But he's been

supportive.

You OK?

Yeah. It's really good news.

Bet Sue's really happy.

Yeah.

Actually, she's been a bit weird about it.

Weird? Yeah, yeah. I think it's their school, you know.

If you're not cut out for teaching, it can really grind you down. She's been

over the shop recently.

Anyway, it's been great working with you.

Likewise.

When are you back, mate?

Tomorrow, but I promised Sue that I'd take you out, so we'll have that drink

another time, yeah? Hey, forget the job.

Might even have a little party.

Over to you, Amelia.

Thank you.

Before I announce the winner, I'd like to reveal an additional element to the

prize. Peter Wark's not.

My husband and I feel that it's only right that we should pay the winning

designer a thousand pounds for their efforts.

So, let's cut to the chase.

The design I feel most represents a Wark brand was created by the very talented

Darren Hughes and Gabriella Wark.

Yes!

Yes! Yes!

What? Thanks!

Miss, that's her daughter. That's so unfair.

I picked the design based on its own merits.

She'd have told us about the thousand quid before, Miss.

Why? Would you have actually made an effort? Maybe even created something you

could be proud of?

Er, yes.

And we would have wanted to. Please have this idea of personalized hoodies for

clubs. Well, that's a very good idea.

Perhaps even a winning idea, if you'd have put some time into it.

But instead, you both just showed up, mucked about and missed out on 500 quid

each, didn't you?

This is your fault.

I don't think so. This was your idea.

Shut your mouth.

Better luck next time.

Congratulations, you two.

Oh, Rhiannon, the studio's booked for tomorrow.

But there's a slot for you now, if you're still interested.

Whoa, whoa.

We've got to be aggressive and like... An hour or something. We've not even

shopping yet.

Can't you just get it? I'll catch you up.

We promised.

Come on, she's just an old lady.

Anyway, you're the one she fancies.

Yeah, you'd make a great model, you.

You're already stuck up and selfish.

Shall I run to the schoolhouse and get me clothes, then?

Lovely.

He'll be back before tea time, I guarantee it. Yes, Sergeant found me.

I can't believe you just left him by the side of the road.

I like sci -fi.

I watched a bit of Firefly when I was a bit younger.

There's definitely something going on at home with their adjusting.

His dad made me fetch him out of class earlier.

I mean, I wouldn't trust him as far as I could throw him. And Ali's been in and

out all day for the right reason.

breaking up? I don't know.

Not really any of our business. Although,

I think your first guess was closer than a mark.

Oh, yeah.

You know something, don't you?

Oh, come on, Maggie. Share the wealth.

Really?

Drugs? No.

Oh, isn't it?

Oh, my God.

Vaughan, send it to your dinner boarding school.

Luke Price is doing a new Star Wars film, isn't he?

Boarding school?

I thought it was something way juicier than that.

Well, the real question you want to be asking is why.

Everyone knows Justin's out of control.

Maybe he's one of them really strict ones.

Like them kids haven't been through enough upheaval.

Leo has absolutely got it.

Mind you, looks like he's cheered up a bit now.

It went on for about a series and then it just stopped.

No, it was my favourite show ever.

How are we supposed to respect Mr Fitzgerald to run the school of

If he can't, he can run his own family.

Hold that thought. No, I'm not saying I didn't like the original series. It's

just... Lord of the Rings does it for me every day of the week.

Maybe it's something about high fantasy that gets me.

Right, Mandy, I'm sorry I've got to go, but I'll speak to you later.

And it was really nice talking to you.

I hope things get a little bit better for you at home.

She was having some computer trouble.

I think she's just a bit lonely.

Have I done something wrong?

Look, try to stick to practical advice rather than the personal stuff.

You don't smash in honestly.

You don't have to be a robot.

But there's a line.

Hexer, you can't be here.

I don't need to be alone.

I'm serious. You need to go.

You've got to hear me out, OK?

Then I'll leave you alone.

OK, that's great.

Lovely. Shall we try something a little more demure?

What?

Let's try your arms here.

Imagine your arms are light as a feather.

A little less flappy. We're not trying to take off.

OK.

OK, let's do one at the side and really pull that

in, yeah?

Tighter, yeah?

Yeah. Lovely.

I can't breathe, Mrs Wark. What's the matter about the reading?

Has it all worked out for you, then?

Of course.

Simon's playing his part to perfection, as usual.

Well, to part, aren't we?

Me and, um, sensible Simon.

Don't.

He doesn't deserve to be mocked by us. You shouldn't even be here.

No, I had to come.

I think you're making a mistake.

I know that you reckon I'm just that guy who sleeps around and that you can't

trust. But I am not that person anymore.

I'm serious.

I want to settle down.

I'm sure when you meet that someone, you'll make them very happy.

Don't get it, do you?

You're the reason I've changed.

OK, before, it was just about the chase and that rush you'd get, and afterwards,

I'd feel nothing. But with you... ..it's completely different.

You only want me because you can't have me. No, that's not true.

Really, part of me wishes I didn't feel this way at all.

Because, Sue, it is killing me.

This is madness.

It's so stupid.

What's the stupid thing with you getting married to Simon, hmm?

What if that's a mistake?

What if we're the ones that are supposed to be together?

Fine.

That's all I came to say.

I love you.

I wish I didn't, but I do.

Hello, Darren.

And, er... I'm Maggie.

Girlfriend.

Teacher. I'm just teasing, love.

Gingers aren't it tight?

Excuse me?

No offence.

None taken.

I'm just here to make sure you're not the knife -wielding maniac.

No, I'm more the bop them over the head and chain them to the radiator type, if

that's what you're worried about.

It's lovely to meet you, Mrs Brumman.

Don't worry, Mrs B, I can run rings around grace.

Yeah, well, good luck with that.

I'll leave you to it. Have a lovely evening. Thank you. Oh, and pass my

on to that headteacher. I haven't had a young man round to dinner for years.

Come on, then. Let's have a look at that steak.

All right.

Do you want it moving?

Are you laughing? You said you wouldn't cut in. I did.

I just didn't think you'd have the stomach for it.

What did you ask me for, then?

A little test to see if it'd put you off.

I don't want a couple of sulky teenagers around here if they'd rather be hanging

about the streets in hoodies.

What makes you think we do that?

That's what most kids around here do.

Well, um, we're not all the same.

I used to do loads with my mum when it was just me and her.

She's dead now.

Was she sick?

Part of, yeah.

Right, let's have a look at these then.

I'm sorry about your mum, Darren.

Are you ready for this?

I'd say you're a size 12 there.

14 tops.

I might have to take a little bit more off the chin.

I think I look really weird.

Doesn't even look like you. I think she'll look stunning.

I thought you said I looked nice before.

You do.

But even the plus -size world has its limits.

We were only talking about a little slimming.

XL.

Not XXL.

Don't let my mum bully you into anything you don't want to do. As if I'd do

that. Just don't let it change you into something you're not.

You either see me like this or not at all.

Where are you going?

To cook an old lady dinner.

Do you want to join me, Darren and Grace, for some steak and chips?

I'd love to.

Don't wait up, Mum.

Hi, Gracie.

Sorry we're late.

This is my friend Gabriella. Do you mind if she joins us?

We've bought desserts.

Welcome, Gabriella.

You've missed the steak.

Well, I'm here now.

I'm surprised you're on the wrong ground with us now. You're all glamorous.

I'm not doing it anymore.

What? How come?

Look, I'm sorry for being a bit of a nightmare today.

You touched them.

You know me.

Doddle. And look at them now.

Look at the little beauties.

This whole thing's your fault. Just calm down.

No, I won't, actually. This is your fault, too. If you hadn't left Mum and

brought us here, none of this would have happened.

What if he doesn't come back? Not going to happen.

Let's call the police.

No need.

How are you feeling?

Better. Good.

Do you have that bath?

I'm not about to.

Oh, you should see it down here too. It's so beautiful.

And I had a quick look online, right, and we can afford a three -bedroom house

down here easy.

Maybe even a loft conversion for a bit more space.

Oh, I could just picture you popping down the village shop with your basket.

Never disappear like that again.

I didn't know what to do. I was angry.

It helped.

I didn't know where you were.

Dad, I'm not a kid. No, but you are my son.

Look, if you don't want to go to boarding school, you don't have to.

Really?

You mean it, Dad?

You can stay?

Hey, take it easy.

I thought I'd never get a minute alone with you.

I'm so sorry about everything.

It's fine.

She made it impossible for you.

Please don't hate her.

She just doesn't get it.

We're together and that's it.

Schmeckman. So what?

I can stay.

That's the best possible outcome for us.

And she can't tell us what to do anymore.

Yeah?

I'm sorry I didn't consult you.

But I can't send him away.

I know.

Thank you.

I don't know what happens now.

Good night.

Can I not say goodbye?

We need to get going.

Hey.

How long will you be? I'll call you.

Where is he?

He's gone to stay with a family friend.

No way.

How are we going to do this?

Do what?

Tell Simon.

Leo?

Yes? Mandy, from the hotline.

Oh, right. Hi. When I got the job.

Sorry, mate. Do you want to tell me about something?

Mandy?

Where are you?

Give me one good week and I said... Oh, I knew it.

The Apprentice coming right up, and it's all about negotiation tonight. They get

into discount buying.

Then at ten, over on BBC Three, Grimmie's in charge.

Why sweat the small stuff?

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