Original subtitles

That's the third one this week. Tom, not in the kitchen.

Dead bird's on the doorstep. That's how theory will kill us to start.

We don't know it till... Well, we will do soon.

So we get him on camera, and then what?

Then it's not our problem anymore.

Right. Ready to go, babe?

Can you give me a minute?

Just say goodbye.

Bye.

Are you sure you don't want to stay here till you find somewhere to buy?

Er, we've arranged to pick up the keys at lunch.

Well, I hope you're renting cheap. It's hard enough for me to get a mortgage

these days.

Yeah, of course.

I'm sorry.

You're free of us now, Tom?

I'm going to miss you.

And you, soft lad.

I'm very happy for you, aren't we, love?

Yeah.

Right, well, Shipley Heights, here we come, eh?

Dinner at six, let's see.

It's been a mile, hasn't it?

I don't think so, do you?

I don't think so.

Why are these on the air?

I'll tell you what, I'm going to swing for him one of these days to cheat a

little dick.

Brantley?

Brantley? Hmm?

Oh, for the love of God, give her a call.

But most certainly will not.

If that woman wants to ring me with an apology, then fine. Well, you're going

have to find somewhere else to stay, aren't you?

Because you're only supposed to be crashing at mine for a couple of nights

the old flaming week.

The dissolution of my marriage was not, as I recall, a solo endeavour. Yes, and

I've tried to explain to Fleur that it was all a misunderstanding, but you

staying with me is hardly making things better, is it?

Anyway, I've got enough to worry about with Maxine without you moping about.

Come on, get out.

Oi!

3 minutes.

Here you go, long spell.

Yeah, you got it.

Won't touch that for you, love. Goodbye.

A fulcrum demonstration.

You asked me to look after the Earl situation.

Is it one of Mel's ideas?

No, it's mine.

We don't know if this has got anything to do with Earl or any of our students.

Tom seems convinced.

Yeah, well, Tom's been saying a lot of things.

The entire lesson, well, it looks like you're saying Earl's guilty.

It's not all about him.

There are other kids who'll benefit loads from an experience like this.

Besides, this bloke can teach wild animals to do what he tells them to.

I think our kids are going to need a little bit more than bird seed.

So do falcons.

It takes a lot of patience to earn their trust.

It'd be a good lesson in discipline, responsibility.

You haven't exactly left me a lot of choice, have you?

Rachel, you asked me to handle this, and I'm handling it. If you don't like what

I'm doing... OK, all right, you're right. It's your call.

But remember, my name is on that risk assessment.

Go run that clockwork.

One second with you, Doc. Arms up. At you.

People in staff are the same.

Yes, well, I was running late this morning.

Oh.

Oh.

How many times? There is nothing going on.

If you must know, I told a stupid lie because I didn't want to go out with

And if you'd kept your flaming mouth shut, we wouldn't be in this mess in the

first place. I'll have to take these, I'm afraid.

Deadly weapons in the wrong hands.

Very funny. Come on.

This is revenge, is it?

Excuse me?

Fine. You win.

Well, if it puts a stop to all this nonsense, I will let you take me out

But I'm not cheap.

Now give.

That ship has sailed.

You're not the woman of principle I thought you were. So the ladies are

a pack to your door, are they?

An offer like that doesn't stay on the shelf very long.

What, you got somebody else?

Right.

Well, she's not having my hair sprayed.

As you were.

Right, one at a time, please. One at a time.

Oi! As you were.

Do it, Kelly.

Surprise, surprise.

Sorry I'm late, sir.

That's the third time this week. What's today's excuse?

I had a little bit of trouble dropping Prince off in a crash.

That the latest euphemism for sorry I slept in, sir?

Right, as you know, our beloved head boy is currently taking part in a foreign

exchange programme.

Doubtless two months of taxpayers' money learning how to build sandcastles, but

apparently you cannot live without a replacement in the meantime.

Nominees have been putting themselves forward all week. I did a good thing,

you might not see it that way.

And the finalists are Matthew Older, Simon Hoskins, Andrew Ibbotson and

Marlee Kelly.

Candidates will be making their speeches to the year groups this afternoon.

Right, you lot. Lessons are cancelled.

Thought I'd change the pecking order for today. So, I'm drafted in.

The flying squad.

Right, Steve.

All right.

Come on.

Falconry.

Oldest sport in the world.

Anyone done it before?

My grandad's got a kez on video.

Well, it's a start.

It's not a sport.

No? Javelin, discus, shot put, all originated from hunting.

You versus your opponent in a race to catch the prey.

Only difference is the weapon you use.

Now, I suppose some of you like to think you're top of the food chain, eh?

Well, these birds are the real deal.

Highly skilled predators who hunt smaller animals for survival.

Anyone hungry?

Young man?

Is this the wine, though?

Eh?

You think of what those birds in town does, that's just like everyone else,

don't you? It's got nothing to do with that.

Either way, you're trying to make a fool of me.

Bringing birds to a bird killer.

Still getting mysterious gifts at your door.

They'll be obviously dead in my bed next.

Council said I have to get it on camera. One more strike and they're out.

Oh, Eddie and Rachel will be pleased.

Take more than a little birdie show to get through to that lad.

I'll give it till the end of the day before the little hooligan bites its

off and spits it back in Eddie's face.

Yeah, more like lunchtime.

A small wager, is it? Shall we say 50 pounds?

Oh, you're good for it this time, are you?

Of course.

How about we say the loser has to do the other one's marking for a month?

They'll be regathered by lunch.

Hey, determine what you think of it. It's easier for everyone's benefit.

Do me a favour.

You might as well paint guilty on my forehead.

Do you honestly think I'm crazy enough to be hurting those little animals like

Thompson? No, I don't. So what's all this for, then? To make a point. Show

you're not what they say.

Look, Earl.

I'm one of the few people fighting in your corner right now. I went to a lot

trouble organising this.

You want to just throw it back in me face?

Fine. Jack it in.

Prove you've got something to hide.

Ah, reverse psychology.

All right. You want honesty.

How about this?

You fail, I fail.

Better.

Don't expect me to enjoy it.

Heads down and planning as normal, I'm afraid, guys.

Some of us just aren't doing badly enough to get our own aim and display.

Fancy volunteering ill to be head boy as well.

That's going to go on all day.

You should have asked.

You've hardly been around.

Anyway, I've got to spend most of my free time with whoever wins this thing.

I don't much like the other lads on offer.

It's not two euro, is it?

No. I only put your name forward.

People have to vote for you to be in the final.

Settle down.

Thought I'd rigged it, right?

Believe it or not, your year group actually likes you.

People like him better.

Who? Simon Hopkins?

He's a cardboard cutter.

You've got edge.

What? I've already interviewed the other ones. A psycho bird killer.

Yeah?

Look, Flick, I'd love to do it, but I've got my family to look after. That's

your mum's job?

Yes. You know what she's like. Oh, your mum's a drunk and your response is no

longer. Pour me, pour me, pour me another drink.

Two thirds?

Maybe you should just not bother.

Take it easy like the rest of your stupid family.

Settle down.

Look at it.

Look at it.

Close. Where's all the stuff gone?

That was for show flat.

You don't actually get the stuff that's in it.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, of course.

How much bigger than I remember?

Are you sure we can afford it?

Oh, please.

You're going to have 75 grand coming in off Tom.

That's not even taking into account what we're bringing in from close cuts of my

DVDs.

All right?

We're going to make three times the rent on this guy.

Oui, I can have loads left over.

No, that's not dead stuff, is it?

Morning. I'm ringing about the one -bedroom flat on Shipley Heights.

Yes, the paper quotes £350 a week.

That's obviously some kind of a typo.

That's per calendar month, yes?

Week. For a one -bedroom flat you want locking up.

Poor Grant and me.

This barrier cop's killing them.

Killing me, more like.

Racing on 24 -7, empty wine rack.

Have you tried getting them back together?

They won't even talk to each other.

Some rubbish about the principle of the thing.

Well, maybe they need to move on and meet other people.

Oh, not that again.

It's a valid community initiative, Steph.

Once a month we'll get all the single parents together and we can have

as well.

What, you think I'm begging?

No, but someone is.

Yes, begging for Fleur.

So let's show him who else is out there. Get him off your plate.

And is Rachel approved of this?

Well, no, but I mean, if we get enough takers, then... Right.

Leave it to me.

A few more flyers, free booze, we'll laugh him.

Now.

You make sure Cupid brings his bow. I'll bring. Bye.

A bird of prey will try and train you, give and have a chance.

Reckoning men can take months, or even years.

Bit like this talk, then.

Boring you, am I?

Yeah. I don't see anything impressive about showing off some tied -up bird to

bunch of kids who have no choice to be here, either.

You all know who we're here for.

Michaela. There's no captives here.

They're free to go at any moment, just like you are.

It's true.

The only means I've got of keeping track of this fella is this little device

here.

But ultimately, there's no guarantee that he'll come back, any more than

any guarantee that you'll turn up at school tomorrow.

I've just got to hope that I've built up enough trust, coupled with a little bit

of bribery.

To show him I can offer him an easier life here than he'd have out in the

This is a lure.

A little toy to simulate the hunt.

Now if I can get you to form a line down here, we'll see if Kev's over there

fancies a game of catch.

Why don't you get his attention?

How much time have I got yours?

Not like you to be vandalising a school property, Mr Kelly.

I'm just taking my name off this old boy thing here.

Oh. I don't want my idea, really.

Flip kind of did it without asking.

Yeah, I know she has told him, actually.

She obviously feels quite strongly that you should be in the running. You know

they've been voting for you all week.

It's fine. I'm not really going to be responsible for it anyway.

Well, you seem quite responsible for your family.

Yeah?

Yeah.

You should try telling that to my mum.

Well, it looks like some of you are still having problems with the

And some of you just have other things on your mind.

Both of you.

Bolton! Sorry, miss.

Found you had any particular problems with your essay?

Nah.

No?

If you spent less time floating like a butterfly, I wouldn't have to sting you

with a D.

Muhammad Ali.

Well, you're obviously not so close up about your boxing history, either.

You're right about me feeling anyway.

Cleaver's going to make me world champion.

Right, so why don't we just concentrate on Dickens' great expectations for the

meantime, yeah?

Oh, I'd love to, mate, but I've got to get my hair in it.

Sorry? I've got a visitor at the boxing gym. Cleaver wants me to go.

No chance.

You're going to be staying put till the end.

No way. Can't make me.

Bolton!

Sit down!

Sit down!

No. I've got to go, innit?

The only place you're going to be going to is the cooler.

Melissa got to you as well, then, has she?

Stop the nonsense.

Oh, come on.

Might be a laugh.

For your game?

Is that all my break of this to you?

Of course it isn't, Grantley. But you're going to have to jump back on the

dating bandwagon sooner or later.

It didn't take Fleur long.

I don't want to know.

Look, I felt responsible, you know, for breaking you two up. So I invited Fleur

to this.

Jumped at the chance.

Nearly bit me hand off.

You snooze, you lose, Grantley.

Who wants to be the first to hold the peregrine falcon?

Me.

What a surprise.

How about you then, Michaela?

Put your glove on then.

Just let him step up onto you.

Of course, in the old days, they were all about different birds for different

status.

I know which one I'm having then.

Parasauce? Vienna?

Not likely, son. Not unless you want a nasty peck on the cheek.

What, so I don't even get a go?

You can have a go on the Peregrine Falcon.

I want to hold this one.

Nah. Trust me, son.

She's a fiery one.

Not a big fan of us humans.

That makes two of us.

That stoner didn't look after her properly.

Mother abandoned her.

You don't like me, eh?

Go on, can I hold her?

Please.

I'm sorry, son.

I can't take the risk.

She might take a bite out of you.

Earl, he doesn't want you touching his birds. Get over it.

He's heard about your reputation.

Same as the rest of us.

Michaela, another one like that and it's the cooler.

Who's done what now?

Oh, no.

Everything's fine.

I just thought that, well, you could come in and we could have a little catch

up. Oh, yeah?

Phone's not working?

Um, Marley has pulled out of running for head boy this afternoon.

I've tried talking with him, but he... Well, I just thought that maybe you

have a word.

You called me all the way down here like someone died for that.

It's a really good opportunity for his CV.

He's fine as he is.

No, he's not actually, Rose.

Do you know how many lessons he's dropped out of just this last week?

We do what we can, but if they're not getting the help they need from home...

I'm there for them 24 hours a day.

Really? Okay, is that why Marley gets left to look after the kids?

Has he been saying that?

No, but he doesn't need to.

He's throwing his life away while you're looking for yours in a bottle.

I beg your pardon?

Come on, Rose.

I can get you help. There's lots of really good AA groups.

You can't expect your kids to achieve anything if you're just sitting around

drinking all day.

And who made you the bloody judge and jury?

You know what? I have not got a perfect path myself.

Yeah?

I heard all about that, Madame Mason.

Yeah. I moved on. I got a job.

So, I'm an alcoholic who's not there for a kid and you're telling me to get a

job? Listen, you've got the social services on your back and you've just

in the adult literacy course. You need to work, Rose, to prove to them that you

mean business.

Have you got kids?

Yeah, I've got 600 of them. None of your own, though.

That is my job, yeah.

I could have walked away like all their dads, but I'm up to my eyes in debt

raising the best I can.

You're going to deny me the odd drink for that?

Hi.

Hi. Leave a message.

Fleur, it's Steph.

Listen, I know I'm not exactly your favourite person at the minute.

It's just I thought you might like to know what Grunty is doing tonight.

So can you call me back?

I've got to put him in the car. Yeah, and I took him out. We've got training

do, so... What are you doing?

You can't go walking over everyone else. You should be boxing, Fleur.

Stupid boxing.

That is the best future he's got.

Oh, don't be ridiculous.

He should be exercising his mind.

Not his fifth.

Now he's being ridiculous.

Bolton's mine.

I'm study, you know. And he won't have one left after you're finished punching

it out of him.

This is genuine talent here.

Do you want him to throw that away?

No. I want him to have the choice.

So can I. Bolton, shut up.

Do you know what? Let's go and see Miss Nathan. See what she's got to say about

this.

You know what? I'm going to make sure that he goes to every class from now on.

Who, right?

I've just got to make sure that he works this evening, OK?

Oh, what a shame. If you hadn't made him skip the cooler, I wouldn't have had to

put him in detention tonight.

You've got to catch him first, haven't you?

He's scared!

Ah! Ah!

Ah! Dippy feet!

Get off me!

Psycho! Go on, bird!

Quiet! Oh, he doesn't like you either, Earl.

Take your birds up your arse.

Looks like he's special needs to spit his dummy.

tell a mason I'm a drunk?

No, why would I do that? Someone has.

She's been accusing me of all sorts.

Well, it weren't me.

Then find out who it was and set him straight.

Because he made me look a right pillock.

That's fine. I'll take care of you. Yeah, you better.

I've got it. Mum, I've got it. Come here. Mum, I said I've got it. Hey, he's

kid. You think I can't manage?

No, actually, no. I don't think you can.

You know the reason you're so angry, Mum?

It's because you are a washed up old drunk.

Everybody knows it.

So why don't you just get off home now with your comfort blanket and leave me

cover for you?

Because that's what I've been using since I was ten, so why change now, eh?

I want to decorate it all pink.

All pink?

Perfect, that one there.

Can I pay for that over the phone?

Same day delivery as well.

The number is 6790... 56...

Hey, hey. I'll pay you over the phone, yeah?

Where's the cash?

Mr. Dante Charles?

Mr. Dante Charles.

Dante Charles here.

10 % off.

20%. Oh, check that out. 42 -inch scope. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's the cotton balls and DVDs, you know?

The business clothes.

Gotta start making money.

Five of them?

Brilliant. Nice one.

It would go perfect right there.

That is wicked.

Wicked. Don't say it.

Oh, don't say it.

Hard day or what?

What?

If

I'm

such an alky, who's going to give me a job?

I am.

In the school canteen.

Uh -uh. No way.

Candice, please. She needs this. Yeah, and I need it like all my head.

Look, it's a trial.

Just a trial. She messes up and she's out.

What is this? A drop -in centre, eh?

That woman and her sweat trouble. I can smell it.

Oh, and yours were always little angels, were they?

Uh -huh.

Look, it's different pay scale for supervisors.

I'm sure you could do with the extra help.

Right. 60 quid a week extra.

And I do the ironing and firing from now on. And she messes up and she's out.

Here we are.

I suppose I've got no choice, have I?

Neither of us do, love.

Here you are, girls. One each for you.

Take them home with you.

What are you giving us the kids for? It's adults only, Steph.

Yeah, but who's going to tell them?

Just try and be a little bit discreet about it. Wait till you find out.

Well, of course you know me.

Discretion is my middle name.

Stop. Now, your mum's been on her own a long time, hasn't she?

You haven't to come along.

There's a dad out there somewhere waiting for you.

You have to get her off a flat half an hour after, isn't it? She's all right.

That's my mum.

There you are, you two.

Right, rubber gloves always got to be worn whenever you're handling the food,

all right?

Right, now this area is the bacon area, as you can see.

You've got that there, you've got weights, trays here. If you need

else, you can come to me.

Now this, actually... I've had a thought for a class on weekends, if anyone

wants to take it any further.

Oh, yeah.

I'll see how it goes this afternoon.

I'll give that elk another try, if you like.

Mind you, there was more than just a pie. Oh, yes, several. I don't like to

think of anyone as a lost cause. No.

I can't believe it.

Well, did anyone say anything?

For how long have you been here?

Did you lock it? Yeah.

I can't believe this. Are you sure no one saw anything?

Come one, come all.

Single parents required tonight.

Three glasses of rosé, three loaves if they're lucky. Excuse me.

What is going on here? I thought I said no to this.

It's for the community.

Yes. Not for the kids, thank you. The mother's got a little bit carried away

the moment.

Steph, this is setting completely the wrong tone for this school. Oh, come on,

Rachel, lighten up.

The only time the parents get within 20 feet of this place is when the kids are

on the skin.

Well, haven't they had a bit of fun?

Excuse me, I will tell you what... Can you just give me a second? No, please.

We've got a problem.

One of the orcs is missing.

They've got trackers on. It's one of the kids trying to release her. We should

be able to get her back.

Well, they can't have got far.

Well, it's not how far they've got you want to worry about, is it?

Well, didn't they tell you, mate, you've been out teaching a bird killer?

Earl Kelly's been murdering birds and leaving them on my doorstep.

And you had them out there with my birds and you didn't even think to tell me?

We're not sure about this, Steve.

You lied to me. No.

Look, have we even looked for Earl yet? Because all we've got at the moment is a

missing bird.

What? I told Mr Clark then I saw Earl lurking by the van.

Sienna's my prize, look. You better be praying she's okay or else I'll report

you and you'll all be up on charges.

Hang on, no police, no hysterics, not yet.

Too late.

You should have excluded him when you had the chance. It's not that simple,

Why don't we just wait till we find either the bird or Earl? There's no need

panic. He's probably on my doorstep by now. Right, I'm off. I'll come with you.

Hang on, Eddie. Rachel, I'm going with him.

You drive, I'll get the truck. Right.

This isn't a mile or two.

Paul?

Earl Kelly's only gone and killed one of them birds, hasn't he? Who's texted you

that crap?

Ruth Jones showed it off to Michaela. Happened at dinner.

Told you he was an old glut. Shut up.

The guy's a muppet, man. Let's face it.

Hey, I'd spell psycho, sir. Is it E -A -R -L?

More like... E -X -P -E -double -L -E -G.

What are you going to put in your speech now, then, Marla?

Won't meet with me brother.

That's disgusting, that.

Murdering a little animal. Shut up, Jimmy. It's got nothing to do with

It's his brother, innit?

No, you don't even know what's going on.

Sophia, the whole family's trouble. The only thing that's obvious is your own

stupid prejudice.

How do you expect anyone to get better if you're always expecting the worst?

Yeah, all right.

Settle down.

Marla? Sit down, Miss Mella.

Not so smart now, are you?

Who's in control now?

Marley!

What now?

Nothing.

Just thought you might like to know Miss Mason's given me a job.

What?

Gonna clean up the school kitchens and myself while I'm at it.

That'll it take.

It's a start.

Hey, I heard you pulled out of that head boy thing.

I don't want you throwing your life away for me, Marley.

Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for coming.

We're looking forward to some great speeches this afternoon. So without

ado, let's welcome our first candidate, Marley Kelly.

Pretty much on top of it.

It'll be just down here.

Oh. What?

It's just on the street.

Really?

Take him... Oh!

Oh! He could be anywhere now.

I've left the short. When I find him... He's not going to bring me out back,

though, is he? Look.

He couldn't have gone far.

We sent him this plane and didn't pass it, so he must have carried on down

there. Come on.

Come on, Matt.

Thank you, Matthew.

And next up, we've got Simon Hopkins.

Good. Good. You're looking for security and leadership from your head boy.

I like to think I'm up to the job.

I want better sports facilities and more flexibility in studies before the

year's out.

I promise to be reliable.

There's no dodgy skeletons or brothers in my closet waiting to come out, I can

assure you.

Are you finished?

It's my turn now.

What's that?

Looks like a head.

Right.

Pick up the phone.

You all had a good laugh at me little brother then.

I suppose it is funny when it's not you.

Look, I wasn't even sure I was going to do this speech.

But then I thought, I don't know what else have I got to lose, eh?

Hey, I'm... You know, when someone's got a reputation, people always think the

worst.

But people can surprise you, can't they?

I just wouldn't be trusting him like that.

Look, you know what you lot need?

You need someone that's going to look for the best in themselves and look for

the best in the others around them and look for the best in the school rather

than just... rather than just...

Taking the easy option and picking on the obvious.

Now, this morning I wasn't even sure I wanted to be head boy.

But now...

Now I know I do. And I reckon I'm going to do a good job as well.

Because I've got more to prove.

But you can't let your circumstances dictate who you are as a person.

And you can't let anyone hold you back.

Whoever they are.

Guess this makes Tom happy.

The old school calling for my blood.

What did you expect?

You thought I killed her, didn't you?

No.

Then why were you running when you first saw me?

I expected the worst.

Just like the rest of them. Couldn't you blame me?

You did break into the van and steal her.

I just wanted to fly her for myself.

You should have asked.

And so should you.

Do you want to know who killed those birds?

Who? Our cat.

We've just moved house, haven't we? She's taken him to the wrong one.

Yeah.

Tom didn't ask either.

Nanny did.

Just looked at the evidence and assumed the worth.

They have to bring the wildlife.

They may cut their own mind to eat the truss.

I guess, uh, I guess you want to know some of the policies there now.

Okay, what about vending machines in the common room?

And better storage facilities.

Yeah, more free period.

And more pride in the Waterloo Road six form.

And I was... I was, um...

Um... That's my boy.

My heady head, head boy. Go on, Morley.

Go on, my son.

Uh... Sorry, I was saying that, uh... Carry on.

Carry on.

Just talk amongst yourselves.

Um... If we can invest more in the, uh... With the right amount of... Mum!

I'm so proud of you, you know that?

I love you, Marley.

You know that, don't you?

That's all.

That's all.

I'm all right. I'm all right.

I've got her. I've got her.

You're proud of me, aren't you, Marley?

Of course.

You are, though, aren't you?

Yeah. Because I am proud of you.

Good evening.

Grantley Budge, an absolute pleasure.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put you and I together.

How about, I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I'm at your bed, Barack.

What is with the old school lines, Budge?

Have you got a day lined up?

Shouldn't you be knocking seven bells out the bolt? Come on, Grandy, I might

able to help.

I am attending the speed dating this evening. It seems I am once again to

the field, as it were.

Hey, you seem to be a bit of a hit with the ladies.

What's your secret?

I'm in the marketplace.

It's changed a bit since you were last courting. What was it back then? Was it

pistols at dawn?

Now, seriously, I know it's a cliche, but it's true.

Just be yourself.

That's the problem.

It's only Fleur that's ever been able to stomach that.

Failing that, same principle as any sale.

A, B, C.

Always.

B. Be. Always be.

Always be closing.

Complimentary. Always be complimentary.

Always be complimentary.

Steve was telling me about these falconry classes he runs.

I'm sure he'd like to see you there.

Stuck to you quicker than she did me.

Shame to let that go.

Well, I'll take that as a yes, then.

I'll square it, Mr Clarkson.

No reason why you two shouldn't be happy neighbours from now on.

You get to him in time?

Got him wrong, Tom. We both did. Yeah, right.

He didn't kill those birds. It was his cat.

Right.

You might get to know the lad better if you talk to him. Talking to him's one

thing. You try living next to him. Tom! Save it, Eddie.

You're as deaf and dumb as all the rest.

Where do I go? Where do I stay? Where do I work? Where do I rest? Where do I

play? It feels as though I've been up in this mid -lock for days. Then I'm

hoping that this bitch got some hay.

Whatever happens to the hip -hop parade?

I'm sorry.

Is everything okay, miss?

No, it's not.

Have you seen Bolton? He's supposed to be in detention.

I think so.

Mr. Clay is just looking for the boxing glove.

Which is where?

Do you need to breathe?

It's on Lock Street, but we didn't get that from me.

Thanks.

Looks like I've made some progress

with him.

Finally.

Seems he's found a real passion for it.

Steve's going to take him to the weekend classes.

Good.

I'm sorry.

For not listening earlier.

Got caught up in the drama and overreacted.

Honestly?

I'd kind of given up on myself as well.

Well, I think I made some progress with Marley and Rose today as well.

Oh, what a team.

Getting the Kellys back on track.

We should go for a drink and celebrate.

I would, but...

I promised your sister I'd help her with the speed dating.

Eddie, I cannot believe that you're getting involved in that.

The whole thing should be cancelled.

I know, but it's too late.

What would you prefer?

Her doing it by herself or with a little bit of supervision from us?

Give her a chance, Rach.

I knew you wouldn't have done nothing bad.

What makes you think I didn't?

Don't joke.

Everyone else is fagging off, but I still buy you.

Yeah?

You've been troubling me, haven't you?

Whatever.

I am the only one that knows. You're just a big, saucy big gal.

Well, tell anyone.

I'll know how to do you.

I might not be such a bad thing.

Don't get all huggy -huggy on me.

Better?

Yeah.

Sir. Look, I wanted to apologise for my little brother.

No, it's me that should be apologising. Turns out I got him all wrong.

Yet he told me about your cat leaving those dead birds on Mr Clarkson's

doorstep.

Right. Is everything OK?

Did you get to do that speech in the end?

Yeah. Well done. I look forward to the results.

See you.

See? Not all doom and gloom. Got to be good news about Earl, right?

Yeah. It would be if it were true.

What?

We got a car.

It's a three to one ratio in my favor.

Hmm? Women of a certain age can't afford to be fussy.

Why don't you try leading with that one, Grantley? And all you'll be picking

will be canapes out of you.

I'm speaking of unwelcome surprises.

Show Miss Koresh you're okay to be skipping detention?

Yes, don't worry about it. It's going to be fine.

Not exactly state -of -the -art, is it?

Well, you're not seeing Rocky.

You're lucky I haven't got you punching frozen meat. Right, from now on, this is

going to be your new home, all right, bruiser?

I'll be collecting your rent in sweats.

Bye!

Until you get the wraps on.

What does that do?

Not a bad turn -up.

Okay, everyone, two minutes of session, then move on and no stragglers.

Mmm,

what a pretty glance.

Thank you.

My flair had one just like it, but we took it to the charity shop.

Allergy to cheap synthetics.

It's more a fear of your gnome now, then.

Took me 12 changes of clothes to get here tonight.

I was sweating that much.

Well,

I think you look absolutely fine.

And trust me, I am nothing if not honest.

My grandpa used to call it a blossom, but the doctor said it was eczema.

That's not the effect.

I'm not the jealous type.

And he gave me a cream that brought me out in wealth.

No,

it's not, my own, but with due respect, you're not exactly no previous owner,

she said.

I'm sorry for the interruption, but I'm going to spare you both the misery and

do a swap.

What? Are you through wasting this gentleman's time?

Hop in.

Right, you two, stop messing about.

Get on with it.

Come on. Both.

Both. Jab.

Jab. Jab. Jab. Jab.

Jab. Jab. Jab.

What are you doing?

Done, aren't we? About half an hour. Yeah?

Get back, come on.

Hey.

Why don't you pick on someone your own size?

Ding dong, round two.

And you better tell me why this is more important than detention.

Rob said... Miss, this

is the only thing I've ever been good at.

At best, if you just give me a chance, I can show you what I can do.

I'll never skip lesson again, I promise.

Please don't take this away from me.

Alright.

Well, show me what other class is about.

Didn't take you long to get over me, did it?

I only came to watch you in action.

It's not what Steph said.

What are you talking about?

She told me that... We need

to start communicating grouty budging.

Er... Me and you both.

Proper.

Pretty obvious you couldn't manage the affair, even if you wanted to.

Oh...

Just getting warmed up. Oh, all right, then. Off you pop.

Sorry I interrupted.

No.

Don't leave me.

Is that us, then?

No, it definitely is not.

I still need to get used to that midlife mortarboard.

Come here, you big idiot.

You see?

Some people just need to see the nose on their face.

Does Brantley's missus not mind his scarlet woman being in a seal?

No.

Does your girlfriend not mind you being here?

Is that Chanel No. 5?

Oh, don't give me that sensitive man crap.

No?

Well, I mean... Yes, compared to this lot in here, you're a flaming cat and

over, but... You see this rough -looking exterior.

You don't think there's any more to me than that?

No, I see this rough -looking exterior, and I hope to God that there isn't.

Dave, I'm sick of men and their feelings.

There's only room for one emotional basket case around here, and you're

at us.

Not any chance of me taking over that drink?

I don't know.

Maybe.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Wow.

He is good.

Yeah. That's a stupid spot after all, isn't it? I wouldn't go that far, but

obviously loving it.

In two weeks in the ring with you, I'll be loving it even more.

You'll be lucky.

Not a complete disaster, then? Not a complete disaster, but I don't think

make the regular thing of it.

Oh, spread a little love, right?

Just doesn't seem fair, me and Eddie, keeping it all to ourselves.

Well, do you think that maybe you and Eddie are... I don't know, going a bit

fast.

What's going to happen next? You're going to move in together. You've only

each other for five... Eddie?

Come here a minute.

Rachel's got a great idea.

Do you think that you, me and Phil could live under one roof?

I don't see why not.

Yours or mine. Oh, Rachel,

you've got to come for that drink now. This is definitely a celebration.

Come on, come on, I'll get our coats.

Rachel, I know what you're thinking.

Do you now?

It must seem crazy, me getting caught up in all this stuff.

But I'm deadly serious about your sister.

I just need to know that you're okay with that before we take it any further.

Of course I am.

Of course I am.

Welcome home, babe.

It's our first night alone.

That dessert?

Not quite, but I'll tell you what is.

Is

mum

sleeping it off?

Yeah.

Are you going to give us a hand?

In a minute.

Sit.

You're going to get that.

Nick, I thought I told you not to come here.

What was that for?

Always wanted to kiss her head, boy.

Your work was done before your mum arrived.

Like you said, people can make up their own minds.

They wanted to.

Bit like me.

Have I forgotten anniversary?

I recognised that I'd neglected someone who deserves a treat for all the rubbish

they've had to put up with recently.

From me.

And from them.

That, and, erm... What?

Council safety have sent him a written warning.

Might finally be getting through to him.

Evicted?

I'll kill him, Earl.

Earl, it says one more disturbance and we're out.

Yeah? I'll give him that.

No more Mr Grumpy Neighbour, I promise.

The hell was that?

Think it went that way.

Really big cat, this one.

You happen to love it with the environmental health.

You're finished, Kelly!

Tom, leave it. Come on. Come on. Tom, leave it, please.

Please, come on. Look at the car.

I know, I know. Come on. Let's get back inside.

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