Original subtitles

Oh.

Look how they like you.

Oh, Tom, you only make things worse.

Having fun, are we? You might like living like pigs, but we don't.

Pigs got a bad reputation. They're actually very clean animals.

Oh, come on, Rose. Look at the state of the place.

Worried about house prices.

You couldn't care less, could you?

One.

This is your final warning, Rose. Next time I will call the police.

I wasn't trying to tell you that. We're done next door.

This breakfast club idea seems to be working now. Do you think anyone on

has just still got the same clue as me?

If you would spare my perfume, if you like. Mr.

Ryan, Mr.

Lawson. I'll be two minutes, Janine. I'm just popping to the office.

Matt, it's me.

It's supposed to be open, the supervisor. Better get in here, now.

Right. Pick that up.

You there?

Right. Who threw that?

Get out of your bath.

Our supply is stuck in traffic and I need someone to cover the first half of

this lesson one.

So who...

Right. Grantly, I believe that you have some time free. I have, actually, but

it's my PPA time. Staff cannot be redirected to undertake any other

including cover for absent colleagues.

Right.

I'll do it.

We were that enthusiastic once.

Enthusiastic, yes.

Brown nose or never.

Thank you very much, Davina. The problem is, it's year 11 PSHE group.

Well, they've got to learn some time.

Experience and all that.

OK.

Right, well, I'll get Eddie to sort of watch over you.

Listen, the supply teacher's here for about three weeks and I believe he's

a character, so how about you follow him for the day and we'll just see how he

deals with new classes.

Yeah, that'll be great.

OK, good. His name's Maka, Maka Lacey, and I believe he's from New Zealand.

The lawyer!

Now, outside, now!

Out!

I thought

you were supposed to be doing the cover sheet

today. Yes, sorry. Excuse me.

That breakfast plum is like World War Flaming 3 plum.

No prizes for guessing who's helping Mel with her extracurricular activities.

You had that shirt on yesterday, dirty stuff -out.

Oh, come on, you could have just pretended to be interested.

Some of us have more press and things in our minds than that little tickle

-tackle thing.

Listen, I'm giving you earache.

I'm convinced that... Walk!

Something's going on. Oh, don't be so daft.

Where have I got a man?

Just got you.

Frankly, can I give you a friendly word of advice?

Nobody in their right mind wants to see that thing staring back at them.

It makes you look like somebody of Britain's most wanted.

Just have a quiet word with her.

Put her mind at rest.

Tom, we need to talk to you. Well, if one seats you down, look, can it wait?

Well, it just...

Me and Donnie reckon it's time that we had our own place.

Because of the galleys?

Well, we had to go sooner or later.

Yeah, I give him the satisfaction.

What?

We want to sell the house.

What have you thought about this?

We'll let your first bit of banners out, Ike. If you want.

Yeah, but there's no rush, is there? I mean, it's not exactly the best time to

sell, is it? We'll talk about it later, yeah?

I just wanted to let you know as soon as we decided.

Tom, did Maxine behave last night?

Hello?

She stayed at yours last night?

No, she didn't.

Yeah, her and Chloe had a study over.

No, I was round at the Kelly's this morning. She was there with Earl.

She stayed at the Kelly's?

Are you going to be okay?

Yeah, yeah, I'll be fine.

I know I must have missed a lot of stuff.

Well, you're no warrior.

Thanks.

Come on.

Settle down.

Right.

Let's make a start.

All blondes are bimbos.

I'd agree with that.

Yeah, and all boxers are stupid.

Today's lesson is going to be about exploring stereotypes.

Understanding what stereotyping is.

And how this influences our own behaviour.

Maxine.

Have a good night at clothes.

It was alright.

I know you were with him.

I thought we had an agreement.

We didn't do anything, I swear. I just crashed there.

Maxine, I know what teenage boys are like. They're not fussy about where

getting. He's not getting it from me.

And what did Rose have to say about you staying over?

It was her idea. She reckons I can stay whenever I like. Is that right?

I can take care of myself, Steph.

Hi. Marker Lacey.

You must be Rachel.

What a journey.

Two hours to travel 20 miles.

Really?

Actually, I'm not Rachel. My name's Steph. Steph Haydock, head of French.

Oh, I'm so sorry, Steph.

I thought you were a little too young to be headteacher.

Can you take me to your leader?

My pleasure.

Macca. It's a bit like Sir Paul McCartney, isn't it?

I ain't cleaning this lot up.

I don't expect you to.

Right, Denise.

Can you identify the culprits, please?

It was Oliver.

Yes, but let's have names.

You're supposed to be a supervisor.

Told you this breakfast club idea were no good.

Alex, you are such a bad person.

Alan, I'll call you right back.

Don't worry, Alan.

I'll see you now.

Liz, can I come and get changed?

Yes, you can, of course.

And it wasn't your fault, Janice.

It's not her fault. It is your fault.

How could you leave Janice in charge?

Well, there's something I had to do. This thing hasn't stopped ringing all

morning. By all means, delegate.

But you've got to stay on top of things, Melissa.

Adequate supervision at all times.

I'm really sorry, Rachel. I promise it won't happen again.

What was it that was so important that made you abandon Janice to the mob?

I'm not sure I buy that phone excuse.

Every time I call you, it's switched off.

Well, I'll go and find you some volunteers.

So we've got a definition.

A generalisation is a broad idea about a group of people or things.

So, how do we arrive at these generalisations?

Carla,

this is like my Asperger's. People assume that I'm going to be difficult.

Just because they've met one person who might be doesn't mean we all are.

Yes. That's excellent.

Yeah, and they say redheads have got a bad temper.

They have.

Shut it, you!

OK, let's take a look at some of the vocabulary used when stereotyping.

A little injunction, do's and don'ts, and a list of troublemakers and

malcontents. They'll all get a clean slate with me.

There's a lad on there, Earl Kelly.

Keep your eye on him. Trouble.

Miss Sapton, sorry for interrupting.

This is Mr Lacey.

Marker. Hello.

Davina's on her graduate training course. I hope you don't mind if she

you for the rest of the day.

Or longer, even, if you don't mind.

No. No problem with me.

Great. Well, I'll leave you to it, then. Thanks.

I've, um... I've been following this lesson outline.

I can keep going if you want.

Stereotypes?

Nah, it's fine.

They're paying me to teach.

I never take money for nothing.

Kia ora.

I'm Mark Alaci.

I'm from New Zealand.

Miss, uh... Shackleton.

Miss Shackleton tells me you're doing stereotypes.

Okay. Let's hear some of your first impressions of me.

Why, you got quick tonight round your neck?

Good morning, madam. Could I ask your business?

I'm Fleur Budgen, Grantley's wife.

Oh.

Step right through. I'll just take you back.

I'll just give you one of our visitors' badges.

Thanks.

Right, I'll ring Mr Budgeon from the staff.

Oh, no, it's all right. I don't want him to know I'm here.

I'm here to see Steph A, Doc. We're organising a surprise birthday party for

Grantley. Oh, right.

Right, Tal, I'll go and get Steph. Thank you.

Maori have a very close kinship with our environment.

We're what you'd refer to as tangata whenua.

A what?

Tangata whenua.

It means people of the land.

What is he on about?

Michaela, there's no need to be rude.

I was only asking.

Ask away, Michaela. It's only through curiosity that we learn about each

Come on, let's get a couple of you up on your feet.

We're going to say hello to each other, Maori style.

That's clearly dead.

I thought we paid you to deliver extended services.

You know what?

There's something sexy about a woman in marigolds.

The robber admitted.

I heard you took a bit of a bollock

in. Do you think you're going to get one when she finds out about us?

No. At this rate, you're going to have to get you a full -time secretary.

I can do my own dictation.

Hello, Melissa Ryan speaking.

My hands are a bit full at the moment, I'm afraid.

The hongi, or the breath of life, signifies that you are no longer a

the tanga de fenua.

Come on then.

Go on then, get stuck in.

Put your tongue in.

I can assure you there's nothing gay about the honk.

Why have you got me rubbing him up there?

That was very interesting.

I don't want to tell you how to do your job, but normally we have to report

comments like that, you know?

Comments like what?

Well, the remarks some of the boys were making.

Homophobic remarks.

By not challenging them, it looks like you condone it.

Why didn't you challenge them?

I didn't think it was my place.

Exactly. And I feel fit to let it go.

It wouldn't make any difference if I challenged them or not.

Homophobia, as you call it, is endemic in all human culture.

Well, it may be endemic where you come from.

But we have a code of conduct in this school.

See, where I come from, you'd be guilty of the same thing you accused those

boys.

I'm sorry?

Prejudice.

I'm not prejudiced.

No?

Where I come from, we have to report comments like the one you've just made.

Why can't I get a cup of tea around here?

You know about you, frankly.

Dave, I've known Claire Bodgen for years.

Look. What is going on between me and Grantley has got nothing to do with you.

I'm sorry, but it hasn't. Oh, that's difficult. Have a heart, man.

The poor woman's organising a birthday party for the man. Yes, I know she is,

and I'm helping her with it.

Fleur? Hiya, love.

Oh, thanks for seeing me, Steph.

He's not around, is he? No, don't worry about him. He'll be having a cup of tea

with his racing paper in Stamford.

Hey, how'd it go?

He is so arrogant.

And he hasn't got a clue what he's doing.

You know, I was halfway through a lesson and the kids were really on tap.

And then he comes in and spends the rest of it talking about himself.

I take it this is the supply teacher you're talking about.

Stole your thunder, did he?

Tom, it's not funny.

He let the kids get away with making really offensive remarks.

And then he accuses me of being prejudiced. And if you talk with him for

rest of the day now... Um, hello?

I'm here.

Yeah, I was listening.

How come you're reading that?

You're thinking of selling off?

No. No one does, they are.

It's their house.

So what are you saying? We just let the Kellys win.

Tom, it's not about winning.

It's about what's right for the girls.

Maybe me and you could buy it off them. But then if I qualify, we're going to

have too good telleries coming in.

Are you serious?

Yeah, why not?

A range evaluation.

Nothing to lose.

Are you going to be okay?

I'm shadowing him, aren't I?

Yeah, but is that a good idea after everything that's happened?

I'm a student, remember?

I do as I'm told.

Some schools are teaching, you never see the heads on the corridor.

Well done you.

Now, listen, we asked Davina to stand in to hold the floor just so you got here,

but I was hoping that she'd be able to, well, sort of shadow you, I guess, just

while you're with us.

I found it very interesting. She was giving a lecture on stereotypes when I

arrived.

Maybe she needs to be a pupil for a little longer.

What do you mean?

Racism is such an emotive word. I don't use it lightly.

But I think Davina is guilty of subtle racism, hard to identify with just as

pernicious.

Got away with it without him seeing me.

Aye, aye, that you did.

Listen,

Fleur, how long have you known Steph?

Oh, she's worked with Grant with me for years.

Ten, I think.

So she's a good mate, then? Oh, yeah, she's been round ours loads of times.

Oh, I bet she has.

Listen, Fleur, if I was to tell you something about Steph, you'd see that I

doing it to... I have absolutely no axe to grind.

Do you know that?

I don't understand you.

Steph and Grantley, they're having an affair.

It's true, Pet. They're lovers. They have been for some time.

Who told you this?

Well, I had my suspicions as soon as I came here, like, but Steph told me flat

out she admitted it.

Do you know...

I knew there'd been something up with my grantly.

I'm sorry, Fleur, but I just couldn't... Bonjour.

Je peux vous aider?

Come on, we went through this last week.

J 'ai pas d 'où?

Mon sac?

Ado?

Everybody just carry on with what you're doing.

Fleur, you've...

Ruined my life.

I've had you in my house.

You've had your tea with us.

Fleur. Don't touch me.

I never want to see you again.

You're welcome to the miserable old sod.

Fleur, I don't know what you're talking about. You're not making any sense.

Oh, come off it. Don't play daft. I've heard it from the security man who's

it with his own eyes.

You're having an affair with my Grantly.

Fleur.

but a floozy.

Flo, come back. There's been a mistake.

Mistake is what it is, as he's about to find out.

And what are you lot gawping at?

Davina, thanks for coming.

Right, well, I think we need to, well, just clear the air a little, don't we?

It seems that in the last lesson, some things are said, and Macca is alleging

that... I'm not alleging. I don't want this to sound like we're in a court of

law. Sorry, Macca has informed me that you made several barbed comments about

his background.

No, not at all.

All I said was, in our culture, we don't stand for homophobia.

Maybe I can clear the air. Miss Shackleton felt that I should have

and remarked a few of the boy's head.

I'll hold my hands up to that.

But as I explained, homophobia and...

I don't agree with it. It's part of not just my culture, but all human cultures.

Yes, that may be true, but in our school we have very strict anti

-discrimination policies.

Thanks to Miss Shackleton, I'm now aware of the situation.

However, I did take great offence to the way she appeared to ridicule my

culture, as if we were still living in the dark ages.

No, that is not what I was saying at all.

I didn't... Do you know what I think we have here?

I think we have a very basic, simple misunderstanding.

Okay, look.

I didn't mean to offend you.

And if I have, then I am truly sorry, okay?

I have to vouch for Davina. I can't imagine she'd try and insult you.

Look, you two have both got a free period next, haven't you?

Davina, why don't you take Macca to meet Melissa?

She's in charge of our adult education.

She's always on the lookout for a good teacher.

Sounds good. Great.

Have a good day together.

Yeah, I'm sure we will.

Davina, can I just quickly... If he had decided to push this, you could be in

real trouble.

Accusations of racism are not taken lightly.

Racism? That's what he's claiming.

You've had to talk to him around.

Just be careful about what you say.

I saw the estate agent out tomorrow.

How much do you reckon we'll get?

Don't you? I can't just turf him out, can I?

I reckon we're going to be able to afford one of them flash apartments on

Deansgate.

How could you, Grantley?

You always did have a thing for bottle blonds.

What?

No way!

What is wrong with you, woman?

Thirty -one years of marriage mean nothing to you, Grantley.

I don't know what you're talking about.

I should have guessed there was something going on when you went and got

rug. You're going mad.

Don't come a bit innocent with me, Grantley, would you?

Everyone knows you've been having it off with Step Aid, aren't you?

Do you find the low spec makes these a little sluggish?

Personally, I'm not too keen on its operating system.

You have a good set -up here, Mel.

Although, when I was in New Zealand, the school I taught at offered much more to

its adult learners.

Let me guess, Macca's three favourite topics of conversation.

Macca, Macca and Macca.

I'll be careful he doesn't know he's already accused me of being racist.

But I'm insulted.

I'll do more than involve him if he makes one more crack about my back.

Look, will you listen to me?

It's not true.

It is not true.

Look, do you want to know what I thought?

I thought that it was you that was having the affair.

But what do you think all this is about?

I was just trying to make myself look younger for you.

So it's not true.

Of course it isn't.

Well, why did that security man say different?

Because... Because he's a nosy sod who thinks he's a lot more on the ball than

he actually is.

Yeah, really nosy.

Look at the pair of you.

You had me almost believing you there.

Fleur, you got it wrong. You might think I'm daft, gladly budging.

But I'm not.

I think you could have done a lot better.

is a haka, and it's over 200 years old.

It means the celebration of life over death.

Sir, we're supposed to be doing the Weimar Republic in Nazi Germany.

Please don't interrupt.

That's very rude.

I'm not being rude. I'm just stating a fact.

The Maori culture is not on the history GCSE syllabus.

Well, that's your loss.

Today we're going to be learning a little about my heritage.

But if it's not on the syllabus, then there's no point learning it.

You really are a very ill -mannered young lady. Excuse me, Mr Lacey.

Carla doesn't mean to be rude. Thank you, Miss Shackleton. When I need your

advice, I'll ask for it.

Let me tell you something, young lady.

If the Maori culture isn't on your syllabus, then to coin a phrase, it

well should be.

And when I'm in charge, I'll tell you what is and isn't on the syllabus.

It's not up to you what is or is not on the syllabus. It's up to the exam board.

Sit down.

It's all right, Carla. You are absolutely right. Miss Shackleton, sit

haven't finished with this girl. Now!

Can I have a word with you, Mr Lacey?

Outside, please.

Carla has Asperger's. Do you even know what that is?

No. We've never heard of Asperger's syndrome where I come from.

Care to enlighten me?

No. I've been watching you all morning and you haven't taught these kids a

thing. Don't you dare tell me how to teach my classes. Teach?

You can't teach. But talk about yourself. Oh, yeah, you can do that.

I don't want you backing my lesson.

Well, that's not your decision.

Yes, it is.

You're out.

Thank you, Stephanie.

Oh, come on, Grantley.

She's soon going to realise I was telling her the truth.

Especially when Dave ends up in court for stalking me.

Look, I know I've been a ditzy cow.

Even if I do get through, there is still the indignity of having my private life

the subject of gossip and open ridicule. Would you like it?

And now I'm meant to face that class again after such a humiliating

Well, you'd face them wearing that.

You don't want to see Clarkson, do you?

Give me the phone.

What phone?

And then if she wants more, hand over the mobile phone.

Right, you lot, get your coursework files out. It'll be two minutes.

Two minutes.

Earl?

No way.

You're going to get done, Earl.

Right, where?

Earl just walked out of Clarkson.

Where are you going?

He left me to meet him.

Tap your fingers and you just run.

I know, it's dead weird, isn't it?

I never really know where I am with him.

Excuse me.

That's a good thing.

Uh -oh.

Yes, you might well, uh -oh.

Look, Steph, call me old -fashioned, but I can't stand by and let a decent woman

be cheated on by her husband.

Well, no thanks to you and your huffing size 12.

Everything's sorted.

What, you mean she's forgiven him, like?

Yep. And me.

All out in the open.

So that's it? The end of the affair?

Yep. And just so you know, any chance you might have had with me is well and

truly down the swanny.

Well, if you're free... I'm not free.

But you said... Yes, I know what I said.

What's going to happen when Clark gets here?

Don't know.

Don't care.

You're going to get thrown out.

I've not made so much throwing anybody out, so... Well, don't you care about

your education, exams and that?

You're dead clever.

Yeah?

I look cleverer than most of the teachers in this place.

God, I love you.

I hope you do.

Do you love me?

Come on.

I'll show you.

I can't wait until tonight.

What does that mean?

I'd like to make a formal complaint about the student teacher you settled me

with. Davina, what's happened now?

I've tried, Rachel.

I really have.

But I've never met anyone so obstructive or unhelpful. I'm telling you, she's

one knacky piece of work.

Go, open the door.

Either that or I'll pick it up in teaching.

Thanks, Max, for starting that itch.

Cooler, now.

You are such a wimp. I'm in a such a coward.

She's your sister.

Tell her. I will.

Do it sensitively, yeah. She's still a bit blonde. Look at you. She's got you

wrapped around her little finger.

Hello.

So this is where you're hiding?

Yeah, me and Mel were just talking about the Davina situation.

Well, he's just made a formal complaint against her. He is such a chancer.

God, honestly, Rachel, just tell him to sling his hook.

What are you going to do?

I guess I'll speak with her.

Oh, I just really don't need this right now.

Right, well, if you need any help, let me know.

I, um...

Better go.

Right.

Thanks very much, Eddie.

Is there something wrong with him?

Look, Rachel, there's really no easy way of telling you this.

Me and Eddie have been seeing each other for a week.

Rachel, he is absolutely amazing.

He's hardly been home in two days.

You forget what that...

Every sign of a new relationship does for you.

So when did this... Oh, my birthday?

You know what they say, sex is good therapy.

And it's about time you got someone big too.

Works wonders.

What's this I hear about your boys' training session at lunchtime?

Oh yeah, we've got a league match after school, so... What about my girls?

Well, it's hardly in the same level, is it?

Meaning what exactly?

Girls'

football.

It's just a bit of fun, isn't it?

And what would you rather them do?

Cheerleading?

I'm sure you've had worse ideas than that, Miss Cresci.

Yeah, one for Davina. I need a word.

Rachel!

Yes?

It's Earl Kelly.

I've just caught him with Maxine Barlow in the toilets.

Right.

OK, give me a sec and I'll... Rachel, this needs sorting now.

Right.

I think we both know what was going on, Al.

It's a serious breach of school rules.

Now, normally you'd spend two days in isolation away from Maxine Barlow.

What? But instead, Mr Clarkson and I are going to arrange a meeting with your

mother to discuss your future.

Can't stop you and Maxine associating outside the school gate, but in here it

a different matter.

Right?

Go on.

Get on your way.

He hates me.

I'm a family.

I don't hate anybody.

The lab's unhinged. He needs sorting out.

Tom, I am aware of your home circumstances in relation to the Kellys.

Yeah?

Is it beginning to affect your dealings with his family?

No. Well, it's just Davina and the supply teacher, and now they're... Why?

happened with Davina?

Nothing.

You just both seem to be struggling at the moment. Well, it's probably sleep

deprivation. I mean, it hardly sets you up for the day, does it? Well, that's

what I'm worried about.

But we're dealing with it.

I'm right about Earl Kelly, Rachel.

We haven't seen a half of what he's capable of.

What's going on now?

Nothing for you to stick your fat oar into.

That old Kelly's a flaming article.

Yeah, you're telling me.

Is Maxine in trouble?

No. Rachel's let him off with a flat wrist.

Let them off with what?

You'll have to ask Maxine, Steph.

I mean, I'm not Clark Kent. I can't see through toilet doors.

What's happened?

I caught him in the loo. Together.

Right, that's it. I want to see that mother of his. Believe me, you don't

to do that.

I am not having Maxine hooking up with another dead leg. No way.

Wait up.

A formal complaint.

It's me I should be complaining.

You know he's not actually teaching them anything.

I mean, he shouted at Carla.

He even shouted at me.

Davina, I've tried my best to avoid this.

I have to follow a procedure.

So what?

Do I need to get my union involved?

It'd be an idea to speak with him, yes.

No doubt Grantley would advise you on your position.

Why am I getting the blame? No one's getting the blame. Well, it sounds like

It is just a procedure, and it's one that I'm hoping we can solve with

mediation.

Obviously, we'll have to pull you out of Macca's classes.

Sit with me next lesson.

Yeah, just move me.

Don't tackle the real issue.

Davina, there is no issue. He's a supply teacher.

Pretty obvious who's going to be believed, then.

Come on, Davina.

I'll have a word.

Um, Eddie.

I just wanted to let you know that I know about Melissa and you.

I don't know if congratulations is the word, but, um... Yeah, congratulations.

Thanks.

It's early days.

Well, as long as it doesn't affect your professional responsibilities.

Can't they?

Yeah. You know how another teacher makes an accusation towards you? Oh, is this

about you giving our antipodean supply teacher a hard time?

Oh, hello, I'm not actually a teacher yet, but I'll tell you how to do your

Oh, and by the way, your country's 20 years behind the times.

I'll give you a word of warning. Be careful what you say to people. It has a

of coming back and biting you on the backside.

You OK?

No.

Right, I'm ready.

Bulletproof vest, the lot.

Don't ask.

We'll talk when I get back.

Hello, Mr Patrick, it's Rachel.

Yeah, Rachel Mason.

Hello.

I'm fine, thank you.

Yeah.

Well, I was just ringing to see if it's possible for us to meet up and discuss

the options open to me.

Well, any time, really. Any time would be fine.

Tonight? Tonight?

Yes, that would be fantastic.

Yeah, great.

Well, if that's all right with you, I'll meet you here later.

OK.

Yes, thank you very much. Bye.

Aren't we playing outside today, miss?

No.

Mr Cleaver's booked a pitch for his boys.

That's well out of order.

Well, unfortunately, not everyone's keen on girls' football.

That's dead sexy, that is, miss.

Is that good, Janice? Do you know what you suggested?

That we get rid of the girls' football team and... What? Wait for it.

Form a cheerleading squad.

What? Oh, there's a cheerleader.

Let him bring it on.

That'd be mean.

Hey, but everyone knows that the cheerleader gets the fit blood. Yeah,

mind the sexy girl.

Hey, if I was fancy to go there, plump plump. Give us a W.

A. T.

E.

You here for the evaluation?

I'm Tom Clark, then.

Matthew?

Good luck.

You from the social?

No, I'm Steph Haydock.

Teacher at Waterloo Road. I'm Maxine's guardian.

Can I come in? Have you got ID?

Um... What a bank card do?

It was a joke.

I know who you are.

Still not coming in.

Right then, I'll get straight to the point.

Maxine is leading me a merry dance at the minute.

Yeah, she's a character.

Took a boot to the wall to shut herself an hour off last night.

Listen, if you're here to have a go at me for letting them sleep together,

you're wasting your time.

How long have you lived here?

Two years.

Well, I don't actually own it.

It's my ex -girlfriend's house.

Well, it's now owned by her two girls. I'm just living here with my new

Good neighbours?

Yeah, they're OK. They've got kids, but we've had quite a few clients in this

street in the last month.

They're not selling.

That'll put any buyer off.

Look, I'm appealing to you as a mother.

They've been caught... They've been caught in the toilets together at

Oh, come on.

Don't tell me you've never had your arse up against a bog door.

Do you know, I'm sorry, I thought that we could have a reasonable conversation.

Oh, and by the way, Tom's thinking of selling.

I might have been interested, but now I know he's living next door to the town

dump. I don't think I'll bother.

Six months ago, I'd have said you'd be looking at 200 grand.

And now, you're going to have to compete with the rest of the street.

Well, now I know why you call her the neighbour from hell.

What?

Let me guess.

Mr. Lacey.

All I need is one more accusation against me and I'm looking for a new

No way.

It's not coming back on you being branded a racist.

It's not going to come to that.

Can't we do something else? This is really boring me.

Might as well go home.

OK, everyone.

Who can tell me the capital of New Zealand?

Wellington.

Do me a favour.

Knit to the library and get me a book on 20th century European history.

Me?

Yeah.

Take your time.

Something with lots of effects.

Boom!

What's been saying you've been calling that New Zealand teacher?

What are you on about?

You know, being dead racist and that.

And who's been saying this?

You don't know?

I think it's dead tight, though.

And if she was racist to me, I'd have her sacked.

Yeah, you're right.

Come on.

You think you're so much better than me and my family, don't you?

Why are you out of your class?

And this from a guy who moves from blonde slapper into the couple of months

after his girlfriend gets sliced.

Oh, yeah.

I've had all the juicy gossip.

I wouldn't mind a piece of that divina myself.

Dying to have a pop at me, aren't you?

You're making the biggest mistake of your life, son.

Dad, where have you been all my life?

Is it true what they say about Davina?

She's like some young... You

see?

You're just like me. Get out.

Oh, don't worry, Tom.

It's just David... Get out!

Don't you think things are so much better when they're out in the open?

And I was like, mate, if you don't move... Girls, you can go and take a

you want.

But I

tell

you what, the girls in Glasgow, mate, oh!

I don't know what the hell class happened by now.

What are you doing out of class, lad?

That new teacher let me out to go library.

Oh, silly now.

Library's that way.

Ah, throw it in.

Follow me.

Personally, I'm a bit of an Arsenal fan. Come on.

Found this lot wandering round the corridors.

Can I have a word outside?

Quiet!

The lad, Earl

Kelly.

You remember?

The one that said not to let out your sight.

Yes, sure.

Betham? Why did you choose him to go to the library?

Luck of the draw, I guess, Eddie.

And the others?

I like to give my students a bit of freedom.

Okay.

Well, we've got a bit of a health and safety issue here, haven't we, Maka?

Point taken.

Eddie, I'll lasso them to the chair.

No worries.

Rachel.

I'm resigning as head of pastoral care.

What? What's going on? The Kellys. Look, I can't be head of pastoral care while

they're still here.

Oh, come on, Tom. I know I have my concerns about you and the Kellys, but

about your ability to do the job.

Well, you don't need to concern yourself anymore.

Wait a minute. Well, tell me what's happened.

I almost hit Bill. Rachel, I think Davina was right.

Can you just wait? I'm not sure I'm going to be able to stop myself next

In fact, I know that I won't.

He came into the office goading me up.

I was that close to putting him through a window.

Bill Kelly?

Yeah. When?

Half an hour ago.

Look, I'll put it down in writing straight away in case I change my mind.

OK, Tom, you need to think about this when you've calmed down. This isn't up

debate, Rachel.

I'm resigning.

Come on, Tom, please!

Great.

That's all we need.

McAleese is responsible for this.

Excuse me?

He let Earl wander around the school when I specifically told him to keep him

lessons.

Finn, can you come with me?

Come on.

Lacey.

Um, they were just having a chat.

They've worked pretty well.

Right.

You're getting an easy time of it, huh?

We can sit and chat at lunch and break times.

Because idleness is not an option in year 12, is it?

Miss Shafton.

Thank you, Miss Mason.

Can I have a word with you and can you bring your stuff?

So, has everyone got a copy of the textbook?

We're going to be discussing medieval Britain.

First page, fourth.

Scotland in the Middle Ages, Section B, The War of Independence.

Does anyone have any questions?

You know, today I was reminded of just how important every single lesson is.

What a difference a conscientious teacher can make.

That's why we came into the profession.

I don't think you were making much of a difference today, were you, Michael?

I think I gave him something different, yeah.

Well, thanks to Davina, those kids are going to be going home with a hell of a

lot more than they would have done if you'd let them sit and chat all day.

You can register your hours in the office.

Oh, and as for your formal complaint, if you decide to pursue it, you should

know that I'm going to be backing Davina the whole way.

She cares about children.

I don't know what you care about. It's certainly not our kids.

Your kids?

You talk about them like they're little angels.

Half of them are a bunch of whining little bullies.

And the other half don't even have the brains they were born with.

No worries.

I wouldn't come back here if you begged me.

Sorry, have you been waiting long?

No.

You okay?

Yeah.

Well, I've had better days.

No, I'm fine.

What say we ditch these tools out on the lash, eh?

Thanks. Well, haven't you two got a flat to buy?

We're buying you out.

The house is worth about 150 grand, so you should have a fair whack to put down

as a deposit, if that's what you want.

Well, when can this happen?

Sooner.

Right, well, come on, B.

We're going to hit the town.

Cheers.

Nina.

Look, as you might have guessed, my palacey is not coming back.

You're dead right, Davina. He's a lazy, waste of space. I told her. I said not

to spend any methane from him, didn't I? And if it weren't for his incompetence,

you'd never have had that conflict with little Kelly.

Yeah, so we've got a proposition for you.

Yeah, we understand how hard it is for you to separate home and school at the

moment. So, as from today, I'll be handling everything to do with the

Let's see it as you avoiding a conflict of interest.

Thank you. I'll think about it.

Good. I'll see you later.

Have a good night.

You better come and take a look at this.

Well, I'm just going to.

Ah, okay.

Five, six, seven, eight. What's the loop, Rose?

Ready? Okay.

Give me a W, A, D, E, R, L, O, O.

What do you get?

What's the loop?

I couldn't stop him ever since I mentioned it.

What are we going to do with Bill today?

Hello boys, what's up?

He's the fittest teacher ever, ever seen in my life.

Hey pal, what do you think?

It's alright.

Do you not think it's a bit sexier?

A bit short, innit? It's sexier later.

Well, I will.

What

the...

I thought you might want these.

They probably mean more to you than I did.

Now, come on, love.

Hmm?

Let's be reasonable.

No, that's it, Grantley. You needn't bother coming back to the house.

Fleur, this is ludicrous. What are you doing?

Your best shirt and tie's there if you want to impress her.

It's over, Grantley.

I just hope she's worth it.

Hi, hello.

Thank you so much for seeing me. No trouble.

And please, Benjamin.

Benjamin, OK.

Shall we go somewhere?

Do you know, why don't we go somewhere a little more private?

Shall we?

Just where you think you've seen the buffalo today.

Benjamin, this is Melissa.

Actually, you must have... And this is Eddie, my deputy.

Oh, my deputy.

No flag on you. Where have you been hiding them from?

I'm sorry, I'm... Actually, we were just heading off, weren't we? Somewhere

expensive, I hope. I heard that new place in town's really nice.

Right.

See you tomorrow.

That is a woman in love.

Honestly, Maxine, she's like one of them women you'd find in the jungle.

Like she's been raised by wolves or something.

I'm telling you, she's wild. That lad is trouble.

I've heard yet.

This is my final year. I'm not going to chuck it all away for a lad who's in

year 11.

Good.

Steph, is it true you're shagging Mr Budger?

Max, I might be desperate, but even I've got some standards. So why is he on our

doorstep?

Rachel, I'm not really sure what happened there, but... I'm really sorry,

Well, I just didn't want to explain things in front of them.

Yeah, this has to be strictly doctor -patient.

There's no misunderstanding here.

Absolutely not, no.

Perhaps I should have arranged it for the surgery.

Yeah, of course, of course.

Look, why don't you call my secretary in the morning? I will.

I will.

Sure we should buy them out.

I'm not going to let the Kellys be.

No way.

If that means we're the last people on the street, then the traffic noise will

be down.

My God, what's that?

Not even he's capable of this.

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