Original subtitles

Hiya. Yeah, we're a bit, but we're used to it, aren't we, big guy?

No.

Well, any problems with it, you know the procedure, don't you? Look, why don't

you go off and have a wander? Just don't touch anything. Go on.

Is he going to be all right?

What, you mean about keeping our secret? No, I mean, look, I am going to tell

him eventually, once you've established yourself.

If I establish myself? You will.

That corporate experience of yours is going to be invaluable.

But I thought you wanted someone with experience teaching adults.

The teaching bit you're going to pick up along the way. What we need here is

vision, and we need a lot of personality.

No pressure, then.

Adult education could be the biggest thing to happen for this school in

you know? More funding, a strong culture of learning.

So, yeah, no pressure.

Lots of bums on seats. OK.

Exactly.

Melissa, if we don't get the first lot to sign up today, Ralph Mellon's going

do his best to pull the plug on the whole thing.

One at a time, one at a time, please.

What is that? I don't know.

I think we'll come into something when we've got to protect our kids like this.

Not a lot I can do about that.

Oh, you're right.

Just have to be careful who we let in next time.

Out of the way. Out of the way. Out

of

the way.

I think he's sick. He's been here 11 months. Yeah, that's all you need to not

think. No.

Oh,

look. Oh, it's fucking up.

That's sweet.

Blow that thing.

What are you charging?

Yeah, but I'm going to be making a few buds with the DVDs in there. So you may

as well cut a few heads while writing. Look. A number two all over. How easy

it be?

But this is cutting.

I'm only supposed to be styling.

They'll make them find out I'm charging.

Then we just don't tell them, babe.

Mate, how much is this one?

For you, Jan.

Let's call it a fiver.

I love it. It's cheap.

See?

See you in a bit.

Stop it.

Slow. I don't believe it. It's wearing a tie.

You are on the boat.

on the pool.

But you never know.

Got that merchandise for you, son.

Nice one, Dad. Nice one.

All right.

Come swap over a packet of pork scratchings, son. You aren't joking,

That's the nodder that lives next door to us. Yeah. She shoved sausages through

our doorman. Yeah, yeah.

Oi, just don't forget, all right?

One dinner at lunchtime.

Yeah, yeah. So, uh, do you have to book, then, or what?

Um, we're not actually open yet.

Oh, go on.

I mean, this don't take much coin, does it?

Go on, then.

What's that?

Look, follow through.

What?

You're not in charge, don't you?

I am. The tooth flame is sensitive, those things.

Just bring your keys.

Nasty things, guns, Miss Aroch.

I'm just trying to keep everybody safe.

Yes, well, I'm hardly likely to have an Uzo machine gun in there, am I?

I

don't

get why they are you here, Mum. Is that like you have to be? Shut up, Earl. It's

just that I've made a poor finger out.

Yeah, all right.

I'm not just doing it for brownie points at the social. I'm doing it to be a

better role model. Told you, ma 'am. We've got loads of good costs here.

Just step through one at a time, please. You can carry the little one.

What are you doing with that? Can I take a look inside your bag, please, madam?

No, you can't.

Madam, you do realise there was a gun in the school last week?

Of course I blame and do. My dental's sitting in an institution because of it.

Just give him the bag.

Maybe I was right. What if it ain't gonna work?

Well, she'd just have to make it work, wouldn't she?

Ah, boxing and footy, am I?

It's a proper boxing club, so I'm going to be looking for members. Interested?

Boxing? Yeah.

Wasn't it banned?

No, it was never banned.

Yeah, but people get brain damage and stuff.

What are you talking about?

What year are you in?

Eleven. It's my first day. Ah, great.

You two can show him the ropes.

Does he get what I... Okay, give him the grand tour. What's your name, lad?

Philip. Philip. All right, he'll still show you around. I've got a meeting, so

stick this in the cupboard, all right?

You two, stop messing around.

Why would you want to get beaten up?

Boxing's for losers.

Don't know what you're talking about, mate.

Can you afford to lose any more brain cells?

Brain cells. What are they?

Brain cells.

Have I heard right?

Starting up a boxing club in school?

Yeah, starts today.

Boxing. Yeah, boxing.

You know.

Oh, yeah.

Dog fighting, but with boys instead of dogs. It's good that do boxing all

a decline in budding. It's a fact.

Does Aunt Rachel agree with it?

I'm certain she's going to get the full cleaver sales pitch.

Show them.

Come on, then. I was going to show you. You're bothering.

Guys, answer me. I'm telling you.

Who are you?

You did.

He's used to being the new kid, so he should be OK.

Put him in a nice form.

And keep him away from our Kelly.

I wish I could keep away from all the flaming Kellys. Well, just continue to

keep them under close scrutiny and flag up any problems.

They're getting special treatment now.

Tom, are you OK?

Nothing that a good night's kit wouldn't put right.

You try living next to these people.

The Kellys are hard work, Tom.

But we have a duty of care.

This is what we do, mate. You know the drill.

Enjoy it. It'll be a laugh.

You could even invite some of them back to party later.

Yeah. They look like they love a good bender. Oh, go on.

Oh, miss.

Hi. Your mum's here.

Oh, excellent, Sam.

That's a surprise.

Pleasant one. She promised Sandra she'd come.

Social worker.

Oh, right.

Well, after Denzel, we've all been on our back about this, so she comes here,

she's off the flop.

Well, that's excellent. Great.

She'll find something in there to interest her.

Watch her, though, miss.

She'll try and get herself kicked out.

I've seen it all now.

This is a brand -new venture for Waterloo Road, and it's something that

always believed that schools should be about.

They call it Wraparound Community Services, and I'm hoping, with your

going to be a really great success.

Right. I'm going to shut up now.

And I'm going to hand you over to Ms. Ryan, our expert.

Okay, thanks, Rachel.

First things first, my name is Melissa. You can call me that or Mel, whatever

you feel comfortable with. Just not Ms. Ryan, please. Makes me sound like a

lesbian dominatrix.

Okay, now, today is about finding the course that best suits you. So if it's

basic English and math skills you're after, business skills, learning to surf

the net... Or just making a good pot of tea.

We've got it here.

Okay, now I see that everyone's badged up. It's time for the official tour.

Shall we get going?

She knows how to work a crowd.

Yeah, she's got great potential.

I still think it's a big risk. She doesn't have a conventional teaching

background. We don't need conventional in this place.

No, but we do need qualified.

Someone with proven teaching skills.

Remember, these adults have been failed first time round.

Are you absolutely sure Melissa can give them what they want? What they need?

Eddie, I have the slightest doubt of Melissa's ability to do this job. Why

wouldn't everyone point to her?

I'm just saying.

Yeah, well, a little less carving and a little bit more support, please.

Right, keep it down, please.

Oi!

And turn to page 46 of your textbook.

Got the sniffer dogs with you.

No,

no, no, no. I'm just doing the rounds.

Making sure everything's in order.

Everything seems to be in order.

Look, Tim, I've had this at home for ages. It's nothing.

I thought you might find a use. You know, show the kiddies, right?

Right, well, thanks, Dave.

I'm sure it'll come in very handy.

It's the Eiffel Tower.

Not a word from either of you.

Oh, well.

Oh, you'll be right up her street. She's not had a man for ages.

I know.

She'll look bad for 50, I'd even.

Oh, don't let her hear you say that. She'll kill you.

Listen to Cure It Day.

Unless I know something about you, I won't be able to advise you on the best

courses. So, just a little bit about your family, background, hopes.

You want to know what?

Everything. Warts and all.

I reckon we're a pretty unshockable bunch here, aren't we?

Well, I left school when I was 14. We're now no qualifications, no skills,

nothing.

But my lad, Dante, is setting himself up in business, so I just want to help

him, really, if I can.

Well, I'm not that old, and I thought, right, go for it.

And I suppose I wanted to set a good example for our Bolton and all.

Yeah, well...

I left school when I was nine.

My mum kept me off to keep her company and that.

She didn't like me leaving her.

She'd sit and drink herself stupid.

There were all sorts round, day and night.

Didn't she get into trouble or...? We never stayed in the same place for

than six months.

When I was three, I got kidnapped by a gang of child traffickers.

I know. When do you want to better yourself?

Luckily, I got rescued by the SAS.

Oh.

Yes.

Thanks, Rose.

Nothing wrong with your imagination, then.

I want my PE department to be the best in the country.

Now, listen, I could do with some help running the senior netball team,

actually. Here comes a charm of things. Oh, well, yeah, come on. I can see

you're a natural sportswoman.

Yeah, well, what about the girls' football team? Oh, don't worry about the

I'm going to change a few things there as well. Tom's a little bit, um, he's

hitting me.

He's worked really hard on that thing.

Yeah, I know.

Listen, can I count on you?

Yeah, sure.

Good. I'll see you later, yeah?

Look at her.

I love it. Keep your eye on that lad, Smiley. He looks the business to me.

agile, quick hands, perfect physique.

Boxing channels aggression. It promotes self -discipline and commitment.

I get it, Rob. I get it.

I'm just a little bit nervous about introducing full contact boxing. It

exactly seem like the appropriate time.

It's the perfect time.

Once Rob establishes the club and a certain type of kid starts coming,

be less smashed windows, less graffiti.

That's what I call community involvement.

See, I'm a fully qualified ABA coach.

OK.

OK, right, but I want all the procedures in place, health and safety, you know,

the whole lot, of course.

Absolutely. I knew I'd win you over.

Excuse me, you haven't won me over.

Let's call it a trial, see how it goes.

Try.

Go... Good, good, good, good.

All right, lads, swap over.

Just use as many words on the board as you can, OK?

And if you get stuck, shout out.

Stuck? I'm a flaming bamboozle.

Look, look, guys, guys.

It doesn't have to be the perfect letter.

Just try and use as many of the words on the board as you can.

She keeps saying that.

Maya, it takes care of all our financial affairs.

Oh, it's a waste of time for me, this.

What do you do when you're finished?

Oh, that's great.

Why don't you try writing to a newspaper?

A letter of complaint.

What about?

Anything you like. House prices, taxation.

Judent cigarette break?

Okay, everyone.

Let's look at the board again for a minute, please.

Now, we've tried using nouns and adjectives in our letter.

Now, a noun is a word that's used... They're not from Eastern Europe.

Talking slower and louder isn't going to make them understand.

I know you tried your best, but I didn't have a clue what you were on about.

We'll get there, Mrs Hall.

Is everything OK?

Yeah. It all went pretty well, I think.

And how was Rose?

Oh, she was fine. She did everything I asked her to.

That's excellent.

I know her being here is going to have a positive effect on her kids, so well

done, you.

Look, things are going well, aren't they?

It just seems the longer we leave it... Do you know what? I'm going to tell

Eddie about us.

And there's no time like the present.

Try that again.

Step right through.

Amazing. See, that is the highest sensitivity.

You can set that to pick up coins, belts.

Anyway, yeah.

She's really, really lonely.

She is, yeah. But she's just a bit old -fashioned.

What do you mean? Well, she'll never ask a bloke out. She thinks it's up to him

to ask.

Oh, she's a proper lady. She's dead shy, really.

But don't say out to her, will you? Because she'd go mental if she knew we

like, matchmaking and that.

Don't worry, I won't say it, did you, nerd?

See you later.

See you later.

Bye. Bye.

Excuse me, guys.

Do you mind putting those out? It's just that this is LA property and there's no

smoking allowed anywhere.

Thank you.

Very nice.

She can't eat for toffee. I'm telling you, my three -year -old could do

Um, sorry, folks, we're just starting back in a couple of minutes.

It's not for me, love.

Sorry.

Don't worry about it. Natural wastage.

Oh, you, uh, wanted to tell me something about Melissa?

Oh, no.

Don't worry. It's nothing important.

You're sacking me. True love for adults in school.

Education is the only term where there's politics.

Tom, we haven't won anything.

It's not all about winning.

That's exactly what it's about. It's competitive sport, Tom.

Nothing else matters.

Yeah, whatever.

Hi, Dave.

Hi.

Everything OK?

Smashing, smashing.

I thought you'd make a jolly kick.

Right.

Thank you very much.

Nice with a cup of tea.

Lovely.

Less calories than an eggless cake. That's why it won't do as much damage to

your waistline.

I'll remember that.

Listen, are you having lunch in here at lunchtime?

Yes, probably.

Great, I'll see you then.

Get in there, security there.

Well, look at it this way.

No more freezing your optics off on the touchline.

Sorry. The truth is, I like it.

It's a break from the classroom, and the girls are relaxed.

I started that team. It took a whole load of grief in the process.

I'll tell you what.

Why don't we go out for a curry tonight, have a few bottles of wine, and then

straight home to bed?

All right, do on you, man.

Ain't got to be your buddy's a prick.

You're supposed to show me around all day.

Were you born annoying?

No phones in school, mate.

Hey, give it back.

I'll give it back, all right? I'm warning you.

You're warning me?

As if, mate.

I scared you.

Oh, yeah.

Looks like you fit all the stereotypes in the box today.

I need lousy flat nails.

Get in there!

Sit down!

Get out!

Leave me alone!

Get away!

I reckon we'll be down to half the class by lunch.

Yeah, what does that mean?

It's loads more nose back for me.

Come on, Rose. Use the name and password in the envelope, please.

Look, he won't let me log on.

Let me have a look.

Try this.

I think we might have to send her the computer technician.

It'd be nice if we had someone teaching us who actually knows what they're

doing.

Guess what my password is.

Yeah, go on.

Rose one.

Rose one?

They'll have a job cracking that.

Miss Ryan, can I just have a little word, please?

So, what?

Are we here to learn or watch her gossip with her busy mate?

I heard that you've had a couple of walkouts.

Rachel, I can't help it if they don't want to learn.

But I'm doing my best. I know.

I know you are.

I'm not going to go at you.

I know they're a hard group.

Just got to capture their imagination, you know?

Come on, Mel. You're great at that sort of thing.

Inspire them.

It'll take more than inspiration with them, I bet.

What is the problem?

Oh, everything's fine.

I'll work it out.

You got to, Mel.

Really. I just can't deal with any more leavers. I promise.

Does anyone see Philip Ryan, the new lad?

My pick is a bit tied up there.

OK, Bolton, I can see you're dying to tell me what it is that you and the rest

of the class know that I don't. He had to answer a call of nature.

Yeah.

How is he going to do his flies up?

Philip, you in there?

Philip, it's Mr. Wilding, I'm your music teacher.

There's no one in here, just me.

I can't come out.

Why not?

What's the matter, are you up here?

Has anyone seen Rose?

No. At least we've got a bit of peace.

What a proper little stall on here, haven't you?

You couldn't give us a quick cut and blow.

Oh, actually, I've got a lesson. It's all right. Go on, I've got the money.

What are you doing?

I'm having my hair done.

Mum, you're skiving.

I'm on a free.

You said after what happened to Denzel, things were going to be different. You

promised us.

Look, I've really got to get to my lesson.

But I'm here at lunchtime.

Thanks, Sam. I could have saved a fortune there.

You've been drinking, haven't you?

Oh, yeah.

Where am I going to get a drink around here?

Sam, love, don't.

I can't show a proper family and a proper man.

Langley, there.

Smiley, over there.

Come on.

Will Nathan find out?

I'm sure she will. She's pretty zero tolerance on bullying.

Anyway, your mum's going to want something done about it.

Well, what's she going to do with it?

Philip, this is your first day.

How would you forget about it?

Listen, I know it's hard standing up for bullies, but... What's happened to

them?

If it was up to me, I'd exclude them for a week.

Great, so when they come back, it'll be ten times worse.

Come on. We'll go to Miss Macon now, OK?

No, no, no, no.

I can't.

Just tell her you're worried.

I can't.

Why not?

She's my aunt.

Who is?

Miss Macon.

The headteacher?

Yeah, she's my mum's sister.

Or the eye.

Wasn't supposed to tell anyone.

Why isn't it pleased?

Ask me who was Rachel Mason's sister.

She hasn't got a sister.

She does.

And she works here.

It's fire.

No. No!

Yeah, her nephew just told me.

It was just a bit of a laughter.

Hilarious.

You do know that Philip's mum's a member of Stafford, don't you?

Let's see you get told of him.

I'd better make sure it's A grades all the way. It's just naked nepotism.

Get to your lesson.

They're putting you through a charade, a selection.

She can't do that.

Wasn't there a case a few years ago? I'm sure I had to teach her.

Well, she's got the sack for giving her sister the job.

If it's not a teaching post, then she can appoint who she likes.

Oh, I'm sure that you and your new assistant, Jasmine, will be able to find

something for young Philip to do.

Captain of the Tiddlywinks team, maybe?

Well, I have favourites, Deb. He'll get the same treatment as every other kid.

Hey, I totally agree.

It's always been my philosophy, that. But, you know, forewarned and all that.

Salut, Monsieur Lawson.

Keeping you busy?

What is it, Steph?

Well, I have got a little bone to pick with you and Miss Mason.

About her and Melissa.

Sisters,

sisters, there were never such devoted sisters. Steph, what are you going on

about?

You don't know, do you?

Rachel and Melissa are sisters.

Seriously?

As true as I'm standing here in me slingbag.

What?

All right, Auntie Rachel.

You never learn, do you?

Oh, look.

I didn't tell you because I wanted Melissa to make her own mark.

I wasn't deliberately trying to deceive anyone.

That's another lie.

That's exactly what you did.

Oh, no, no, no, it wasn't. The interviews.

You put members of our staff through a bogus interview.

You concealed your relationship to one of the candidates.

When Ralph Mellor finds out, and I can't even tell him that she was the best

candidate because Steph or Grantley would have done a better job. What the

were you thinking of? I needed... You needed what?

You needed what? Another stick for Ralph Mellor to beat you with? I needed

someone I could trust. I needed an ally.

I don't know, after last year... You needed an ally.

So what am I, then?

Laterality. Coordination of the left and right hemispheres of the brain. Come

on, Rose.

Believe it or not, this actually helps with reading and writing.

Turn around.

Faster, faster, faster.

Good work, Clarence. Turn around.

And stop.

Brilliant. Give yourselves a clap.

What the bloody hell use of that, anyone?

Jumping around like a Muppet.

I've not learned one thing.

You know what, Rose? I think you'd be better swapping places with your Sam

surrounded by 13 -year -olds. Yeah, because we've had a whingeing all

Who asked you for an opinion?

I don't need to be asked, love.

All right, ladies, come on. Is there a difference between crap and the stuff

that comes out of your mouth?

Oh, come on.

Can we... Yeah, get on with your brown northern.

Stop it, you!

Stop it!

Delivering PowerPoint presentations to nice people in suits is one thing, but

this? It's Waterloo Road.

Stop that!

Clarence, are you sorry?

Melissa has no formal teaching qualifications, no experience.

Stop!

Clarence! Do something!

OK, yeah, it was a stupid decision not to tell you about it. It's gone far

beyond stupid.

Forget that you lied to me, the governors, the staff. Hang on.

I do have delegated authority in relation to appointments, you know. It

blatant favouritism.

You wouldn't be the first head to lose a job over something like this.

Look, Melissa can connect with the community.

You know that. You've just seen it. Fight.

It's a fight. They won't stop.

Look, you'd have to be Mr Fantastic to get your hands around me. Now pack it

What the bloody hell's going on here?

You two, outside now.

Thank you, Clarence.

I really apologise for the way you had to see that.

Look, you know where the dining hall is, so if you can just head down there and

we'll see you in there.

Thank you.

I apologise for that.

I'm going to have to hand down the lunch and try and salvage the things.

I'll get my bag.

You know what? Don't bother, because I'll talk to them first. Why don't you

what Eddie's doing?

Give me one reason I shouldn't send the pair of you packing.

You're an employee here. You should know better.

I feel like sending you both to the cooler.

You can go and join your Bolton.

What's he done? Why is he in there?

He tied her son up in the toilets.

Philip? What's happened? He's fine.

Go get your lunch.

I'll talk to you later.

I think you need to be in the canteen with your sister.

Sorry.

Don't apologise.

And I want your idea to keep us all in the dark.

Rachel's been getting a bit freaked, hasn't she?

Are you aware what Rachel's been through this last year?

Yeah, I do know she's had a pretty rough ride. And then some.

A lot of people are waiting for her to fall flat on her face.

The last thing she needs right now is another failure.

Eddie?

Look, I feel really bad about all this, but it's not Rachel's fault.

Unfortunately, not everybody sees it that way.

I'm not going to let her fail, Eddie. I know you think I'm inexperienced, but...

I can be pretty determined, you know.

Runs in the family.

And I know I've got a hell of a learning curve on my hands, but I can do it.

Just go to lunch, pretend it never happened. Don't let them say it's gone

you. I just don't think about the teaching, the scrapping. Well, if I can

any help, just give me a shout.

I'm shouting.

I didn't know that Melissa was your sister, Rachel.

Well, it's not exactly unusual.

You don't have to have two sisters working in the same school.

Yeah, but for her to get the job ahead of me and all the other candidates and

your sister, I mean, that's amazing.

Best person got the job done.

telling me how much she's been enjoying your lessons, Melissa.

All those brain exercises and that very cutting edge.

Thanks.

Sounds like a load of... You're an expert in educational kinesiology.

Well... The science of human movement used to improve learning.

It's what I came to do, came to do.

Kale, I'm sharp and sharp.

So, any news all going out tonight?

Yeah, it's going to be a laugh in it, Max.

Oh, look at this guy, man. He loves himself.

You, er, looking forward to a party, then?

Yeah.

I'm here, then.

Do you do head massages? Oi, do one.

What's wrong with you?

Ain't that wrong with me, mate.

She just ain't cutting your hair.

Okay, don't touch me.

Shame that.

Maybe next time.

I'll see you later.

Hey, who was that new wolf up there?

I think he's a cocky little get.

I'd love to invite you back, you know that?

It's just my mum. She drinks like a fish and she's going to make a show of

herself. I don't want to be there.

It's okay.

You all right?

You seem a bit down. What have I got to feel down about?

I'm not the one locked in a cell, am I?

I just keep wondering.

You know, we're sitting here and...

You know what's that ends a lot too right now. Have you spoken to him?

My mum's been to see him.

Is he okay?

I don't think so.

Sorry.

I didn't mean it. I just... I know you didn't.

It's just he's my brother.

I can't help feeling worried about him.

Jab, hook and combo.

Here.

Shall we?

Langley, Smiley, here, now.

The rest of you carry on.

Mr. Cleaver tells me you've got talent, Bolton.

Is it for ritual humiliation?

No, sir.

Now, how am I meant to persuade Miss Mason to let you box if all your

are brilliant enough, though? Hmm?

Well, that's up to you, Mr. Lawson.

But I'd send a pair of them packing.

So, boxing club starts tonight, yeah?

Yeah, yeah. I'm not sure I want them in my boxing team. Oh, sir, we're dead

sorry, aren't we?

We'll tell Philip we're sorry and look out for him and that. Yeah.

What happened again, sir?

Um, sir, promise.

Okay, you're on probation.

Put one foot out of place.

Right, sir. Thanks, sir.

Don't make me regret my decision.

Go on, move it. Jabs.

Boxing will soon sort them out.

Good luck.

Okay, swap around.

These any use to you?

What are they?

Worksheets. Number stuff, mainly.

I've tried basic stuff, Eddie. Half of them couldn't do it, and the other half

were bored to riches. Try these. They're simple, fun exercises, useful for all

abilities. The kids love them.

Where's all that confidence we saw earlier, eh?

Let them see more of you.

Believe me, they'll respond.

Okay. Great.

I've let you down. I'm so sorry.

There must be something we can do.

Well, I haven't given you a bright idea, have you?

Look, it's not your fault. It's mine.

Nepotism.

Look, it would have been great if it had worked out. She hadn't done one of us,

you miss.

No, I think she's outside.

Is she OK?

She's doing fine. Look, I've got a few things I need to sort out then.

See you later.

Right.

Rose, I need a word.

I've got this, ma 'am.

Now, please.

Look, Rose, it's just you and me. No audience, so you can cut the crap.

All this couldn't care stuff. The hostility, the disruption. It's driving

mad, and it's ruining the whole day. And it's all the fun, because I think that

you do care very much.

Also, you're claiming to know me.

Pretending to be a shrink now, as well as a teacher.

Look, I can see that you're very angry, but I am not responsible for what's

happened to you.

What's that supposed to mean?

Look, I saw your son this morning and I know that you're worried about losing

your kids.

And that you want to impress them and social services.

So come on, Rose.

Help me out this afternoon.

And let me help you.

Don't take this not even work. I've just tried it in Miss A -Doc's DVD.

DVD? There must be something wrong with A -Doc's machine.

I'm telling you, ain't nothing wrong with a DVD.

She wants her money back.

You only get your money back on fault if it goes low.

What if I knock it off you again?

Come on.

Oi.

We've been told you've got manager at Spokane, didn't we?

Yeah. So make sure you let Lawson and your mum know.

Hmm?

Alright, mate.

You're the one who locked me in the bathroom before, aren't you?

And is it true your aunt is the headteacher?

Yeah, it's not my fault, is it? Don't worry about it, mate.

I wish my auntie was here to teach her.

Why?

What?

And may I jab him and set him down rapid with the force of the king.

All right, ladies.

What's all this?

Mr Cleaver's brought some boxing gear.

Yeah.

I used to box when I lived in Manchester.

Fancy a bit, Bolton?

Eh? A match.

Do you reckon you could have me?

What, now?

Whenever you want, mate.

Mr. Kelly.

Can't you join us?

Sir Earl used to box these. Challenge Bolton to a fight.

Oh, really?

You up for it?

Yeah. Let's do it, innit?

Good, good.

3 .15. Don't be late, all right?

I reckon one good punch.

I'll sit him. I'll sit him fast, man.

Bang it.

It's possible because it's so interesting that I don't know any

It's alright.

I can't speak Chinese because I don't know what to write.

I don't know what to write.

I can't speak Chinese

because I don't know what to write.

I don't know what to write.

You guys can have a look.

There

you

go. Oh,

say, your favourite pupil's there.

Right, let's make a start.

Complete the exercises on page 34. Hello.

I promise I'm free Thursday.

Oh.

Come on, come on.

Right, it's over.

I was worried you'd make it lunch.

My what?

Yeah, good.

Because I made 50 bucks.

We are well in the money, babes, and I tell you what, we're going to earn more

than that tomorrow.

What's the problem?

Just that giving me flowers, tongues might wag.

Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to embarrass you.

It's just, um... Well, uh... I was going to ask you

out on a proper date, like, you know.

Oh, Dave.

That is so nice of you.

And normally, yes.

It's just that, um...

With me being a teacher and you being... It's a bit of a doctor -patient thingy.

No problem, I understand.

I'm sorry.

Oh, that's me. I am 15.

Who is 4 times 3?

Oh, I am 12, so who is a quarter of 20?

I am five.

Who is me minus two?

Oh, and that's back to me, and I am three.

Well done, everyone.

We did that one in 58 seconds.

We never did sums like this when I was at school.

I think I could be quite good at math.

We could fast -track you, Mrs Hall.

How does GCSE maths in a year sound?

Well, I could do it sums, love, but I'm not running anywhere.

Not at my age.

Rose, could you collect the loop pods, please?

OK.

Moment of truth.

Feedback and sign -up time.

Could you hand these out for me, please?

The courses are on the left. Just tick your preferences and order from one to

three.

Anything you like, Rose?

Yeah, for the jam.

Sorry. Thanks.

By the way. Go what?

Keep your guard up.

That's it. That's an easy lad.

Guard up, Miley.

Jab, jab.

Get your combo.

Go on. Go for it.

Don't forget to smile.

Keep your guard up.

All right, lads. Take a break, yeah?

Miss Qureshi, just in time for a little exhibition sparring.

I thought it was only non -contact you did.

No, Rachel's given us the nod.

All right, lad.

Nice media.

Listen, have you had a chance to speak to Tom? It's just that he seems a bit

off. Yeah, no, he's fine. Don't worry about it. It's cool.

Well, look, I'm ready to go.

Yeah, okay.

Listen, I'll catch you later. Drink, man.

Uh, yeah.

Good night.

Low punch.

You all right?

We survived, eh?

Not just.

Not just.

Remember, it's only been one day. Look, if you don't think you're up to it, you

need to tell me now.

No, no, I'm up for it. Definitely.

Rach?

Are you sure that you can do this?

Yeah.

Well, let's go easy on the chill -out music and the massage, yeah?

You coming for a drink?

No, I can't. Our secret's out, remember?

I know. Well, just come round to mine, then. We'll have a couple of glasses.

No, we won't, because you need to go out and get to know everybody. I am not

going without you. Well, this isn't up for debate, because I am your boss, OK?

I take it you got a good response, then?

Yeah, we did.

Well done.

I couldn't have done it without you. I mean that.

Oh, you definitely deserve a drink.

You coming, Rachel?

No, I can't.

It'd be good if the staff saw you let your hair down a little bit.

OK.

Yeah, those meds exercises go down really well. They always do.

Look, Melissa, you proved yourself today. Well done.

But you think I was underprepared.

Yeah, all right, maybe I was.

But that's my personality, I wing it.

I get the job done, don't I? I'm just to warn you, Rachel might still get a kick

in over your appointment.

Who's Ron Rathmallow?

I'm the staff.

And you?

No.

All right, love?

Hi, I'm going to a mate's house tonight, so I'll grab something to eat.

I'll meet him there.

Have you got your keys?

Yep, yep.

Thank God he's made friends.

Don't you want to know where he's going?

No, he doesn't like me quizzing him too much.

He'll be fine.

I didn't have a clue.

It turns out the flaming thing wasn't even switched on.

How did you work out with that Kay woman?

Oh, she sussed me out good and proper.

Are you sure you know what you're doing?

But they say, no, no.

Of course I bloody don't know what I'm doing. That's why I'm in adult

I

don't

like leaving Clona alone with that lot next door.

Don't tell me with her.

I won't keep you out late, I promise.

They weren't there this morning.

Flaming Kelly's.

Well, it's obvious, isn't it? Nobody wants to live anywhere flaming near

All right, girls?

Oh, come on, Chloe, flame. Now, come.

Laters, yeah?

You don't have to go, do you, Dave?

You have to keep an eye on her.

See you in a bit.

Laters.

Steph. Dave.

Hiya. Hiya.

I've, um, dropped me money.

Oh. Oh,

it doesn't matter. I'll let the cleaners get it in the morning.

Can I get you a drink?

They should have talked it through today, didn't they? Of course, I can

I love you.

I love you.

I love you.

I love you.

Fleur, I'm going to have to go.

You can't go. We've got another spot in ten minutes.

It's going to have to be a solo.

Grantley, I'll come with you. Will you get my coat and bag?

Yeah.

It's deafening. I know what you're saying.

You're keeping a professional distance.

Dave, I've not been totally honest with you.

It's just that me and Grantley are a bit of an item.

Grantley?

What?

I don't know any idea. Can you, um, keep a secret?

Yep. Won't say a word.

All right, come on, then.

See ya.

Steph.

You do know who he is, eh?

A syrup, don't you?

A wig?

Yes. And it's a hair replacement system.

And there's too many people. Get out of hand.

Do you fancy something a bit stronger?

I don't do drugs no more.

Oh, come on. It's only a bit strong.

I said no. You're a bad influence, you are.

Brilliant party, though, mate.

Bill, mate.

Yeah? You haven't got a drink?

Ah, thank you. Yeah?

I'll show you my bedroom.

Oh,

lovely.

Very relaxing, with our flaming napper next door.

Get out of my garden!

What are you going to do?

I'm not going to appeal to their better nature.

Go!

There's a lot of flaming ghouls in here.

Get this lot out and the music off.

Can't hear you, mate.

Are you ready?

Do you hear me now?

Get that back on.

Get out of my house.

He's 14, she's 13, and that's illegal.

Meet the clerk to look, I'll get them out, OK?

Everyone out!

Come on, get...

Right, your dad's not allowed to enjoy himself, is he not, eh? You're a mess,

Dad. Is that what it is?

And who's that clown you were dancing with? I don't know. Clow, tell him.

Son, listen.

You're an embarrassment, Dad.

Son!

Don't be like that, son. Hey, don't you listen, lad. Just one can.

Go home and sober up.

Don't they?

Son.

What are you doing there?

Here,

let's get you sorted.

You can't stop there.

I'm getting

off.

Are you coming?

No, no, you don't want to stay and have another drink.

I'm getting off to bed.

I've got school in the morning.

You're staying, Max, aren't you? Of course she is. I've never said anything

about staying.

Go on.

You know you are.

Get on my room, I'll keep on the couch.

I'll even talk to you in later.

About Steph.

I'll phone her. Right, well, night -night.

Good job they never gave us any homework, eh?

Steph, it's me.

I'm staying at Janita's. I'll see you in a moment.

Cheers, mate.

Sorry. Have to go to the gym.

Oi, get more bog paper.

That's not funny.

What is it?

What is it?

Oh.

Oh, my God.

Good job I never had my control pants on.

Look, you don't think I flash my knickers at every man I meet? Oh, I

going to enjoy working with you. Get off!

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