Original subtitles

The following programme contains strong language.

Nadine! You had a heart attack and you didn't think to tell me. I should have

told you. I just couldn't find the right time. I just can't imagine you not

being here at all.

Like I said, you'll get what's fair, but I'm no pushover.

Haven't always been the case, though, have it, Mike? You have both of the

What are you talking about, Mother? That this home will see the dawn of two

marriages.

You actually look like you know what you're doing. Oh, God, don't be creeping

on people like that, you weirdo.

Sorry. How about strawberries?

I'll put the kettle on.

This is nice.

Yeah.

Michael's little sanctuary.

He's very territorial over it.

I can imagine.

Two coffee.

Surprise me.

I'm glad you came over, actually. No.

Do you know what I'm going to say yet?

You're going to say that you're going over to see Luke later to talk to him

again. Just give him some space.

Look, the other night he was in shock, but if I go round there today... You'll

end up making it worse.

At least I think you will.

What did Michael say?

Not much.

He was on the first train this morning, but I think he agreed with me. Sorry? I

said I think he agreed with you.

Should you be doing that?

Why not?

Do what?

Did the doctor say you could... Use a trowel?

Yes.

Have they given you a list of foods you should be eating?

Because diet's very important.

Yeah, I'll look into it.

I know a dietician up the hostel. Tell her.

I know what I'm living with. I just don't want to think about it 24 hours a

So just for now, I'm going to enjoy this.

This bit of weeding, for example.

It's relaxing.

That's what it's meant to be.

I still think it's a bad idea. Stella. Those aren't weeds.

They're hooves.

Oh.

Beyonce, can I call you back?

I just wanted to sort out the money for the baby shower.

I've booked the king suite at the Belmont.

The Belmont?

Yeah, it's only 500, plus another 200 for the champagne.

What?

I only have anyone.

Give us 200 and I'll get them counted.

Beyonce, we promised to pay for essentials like nappies and prams and

not baby showers.

Well, that's a maybe then. No! Look, I'm in court tomorrow and I've got one hell

of a day, so we'll talk about this another time. And do not book the

You said you needed a bed and you've had one. Well, a sofa.

And now it's time to sling your hook.

I want you gone by the end of the day.

Come on, Bea.

End of the day!

You're on your own, Bob.

I take it you're here to talk about what happened on Saturday night.

To be honest, I'm angry.

I'm angry and disappointed.

I mean, there's no way we should have come second.

You and Yvonne are wonderful dancers, but you didn't have the same chemistry

me and Cheryl.

And I never thought I'd say them words. So that's why you're angry.

That Scott Quinnell is quite literally dead to me.

Bobby, have you ever done something that you regret?

Something that felt right at the time, but afterwards just eats you up like a

vulnerable but very beautiful biscuit.

Don't have many regrets, apart from my acid house phase.

If I tell you something, will you promise not to tell anyone?

Bobby, I'm heading into town now, so if you want a lift, you'd better get a

wriggle on. Oh, hiya.

Right, I'll just go and get my things from upstairs.

Al was wrong.

You should have won.

You, Nadine Bevan, are a class act.

And don't let no one tell you no different.

Matusha, Brenda.

After you with that polish.

You wish to use the polish?

Chains of office don't clean themselves, good boy, and this one to have more

fingerprints than New Scotland Yard.

These necklaces are not appropriate to undertake a work. Necklace?

This is my marital chain, and you want to see me... stripped of it. What will

people think? I do not care what they think. I tell you what they think.

That the mayor's gone weak. That her ne 'er -do -well husband have come back and

dragged her standards and morals into the gutter. Well, that can't happen. Not

on my watch.

Remove it kindly, please.

It's because I voted against you in the dance competition, isn't it?

Bobby!

All right, all right.

So I look this good, you know.

Fine, thanks.

You did something different with your hair.

It looks lush -like.

What do you want, Beyonce?

I spoke to Mike and he was busy, but he said I should sort the money out with

you.

What money?

300 quid for my baby shower.

Well,

he said we'd pay for your baby shower.

He wanted me to go over to the Belmont, but I said, no, Mikey.

It's too expensive.

Right. Well, we'll just give him a ring then, shall we? No, don't bother him,

Butte. He's dead busy.

Have an elevator, he said, because, of course, he's in court tomorrow.

Working his socks off, he is.

For this little one.

Shall we? Yep.

I've got to go.

So, that's a yes, then?

No. That's a definite no.

I know what you mean.

My faith is hurting.

Mother had to ask me why I was grinning like an idiot.

Why don't you just tell her?

Not yet.

She had her heart set on a big Indian wedding.

She'll be fine in time, I'm sure, but she's like an oil tanker.

It takes her a long time to change direction.

Okay, fair play.

What time are you picking me up, Dad? About seven.

I'm going to wine and dine you to within an inch of your life.

I know we haven't known each other long, but it feels so right.

It's so complicated, my daughter and your son.

Yes. If we can make this work, I know we can.

I should let you go, my darling.

Hey, I cannot wait to see you.

There are mourners viewing a body in the chapel of rest. This was supposed to be

a place of calm.

And quiet reflection.

And why are you still wearing that ridiculous chain?

Ridiculous? What is this?

Mayor Aunty Brenda in conversation.

It's a meet and greet with a finger buffet and a pay -in bar.

No, this is inacceptable.

I know, I'd love to have done a free bar, but people just take advantage, so

are.

Mr. and Mrs. James, I'm so sorry about the noise. Please, await me in general.

It's jammed again!

Tutor Brenda, you have not what it takes to work in this establishment. I

request that you leave immediately.

You don't fire me, mush!

I resign.

Good, then I won't have to pay the wages you are owed.

Then I am fired, but on my own terms.

I shall dedicate my time to my mayor and flock.

They appreciate me more than some around here.

Tomorrow night, 7 to 7 .30.

Bath casual.

And sorry for your loss.

Ha!

Now I'm back from Dad's, I was thinking I could help out a bit more.

With money, I mean.

I think I should try and get a job.

And I know what you're going to say, that you want to look after us and

needs to look after the kids, but... Did you just say good idea?

It's not the 1950s, is it?

Do you want to get a job? Go for it. I'll cook and take the kids to the

and that, as long as I can still do the fitness class in the evenings.

Of course you can.

You just want to see me in an apron, don't you?

Hiya.

Hiya, Sal. You all right?

Yeah, good, thanks.

Luke?

Right, well, we've got to go.

Listen, about the other night... You should have told me sooner.

Your dad wanted to. It's just that it's very... See you later.

Luke Morgan, I am talking to you.

We only did what we thought was right.

Well, keeping secrets and treating me like a kid. Yeah, well, you're acting

a kid now, aren't you?

And you know what?

You're not the only one who's suffering.

So drop that face and bloody grow up, will you?

Virus video.

A viral video.

It's when you click a film online and people click on it. Oh, like a zombie

film. Well, my zombie film is a bit more slow burn -like, not as commercial.

He means nobody watched it.

We're going to find Banjo doing tricks. Aren't we, Banjo?

Banjo can't do any tricks. That's what I said.

Carish might be able to teach him. She's great with him and he loves her.

Come on, Banjo. Come on.

She's not irritating you so much now, then, is there? What?

I said, you and Kerry, you seem to be getting on all right.

Just making an effort, little Al.

Of course we are.

You are so annoying.

And, as you can see, there's plenty of room.

Seating for up to 300 guests.

Hmm. That's a little cosy.

The bride is blessed with a very large family in Bombay. Very large and very

well caught off.

Then you'd be pleased to know that our facilities are second only to the Palace

of Versailles.

Oh, Aunty Brenda.

Ponteberry Town Hall have played host to royalty, industry and several well

-known snooker players.

I want the best for my son.

Jack Adish, get him married.

He's barely got divorced.

He's a one -man reality show, this one.

But, of course, I will have a look and see when the room is free.

It won't be soon, though. We've got a lot of high -level functions.

The Mayor Aunty Brenda charity roast.

Mayor Aunty Brenda's business seminar.

Sing along, our Aunty Brenda.

Sing along, our Mayor Aunty Brenda.

Well, I would appreciate it if you could get back to me with some dates as soon

as possible.

And I want it to be a surprise, so not a word to jug these.

Discretion is written through me, like us. Tickabarri Island Rock.

this one? Yeah? Ready?

Okay, Banjo, this is your moment.

Are you turning?

Look. Hello, one, two, three, go!

Right. Okay, well, I admit this is not going as well as I'd hoped.

We could buy some doggy treats.

You don't like gum?

You're dead fussy about food.

Yeah, I can see that.

Let's just go home. This is pointless.

Oh, what? No!

Oh, don't give up yet. Let them another go. He can't do tricks. It's too hard. I

knew it. So did Ben.

Why didn't you say something?

Oh, I don't know. You seemed so excited and I didn't want to spoil it.

Where has he gone, anyway?

Banjo!

Banjo! Banjo! Banjo!

Banjo!

I'll probably wait a bit before telling Jamie. You don't mind, do you?

No, of course not. I understand.

He likes you, though.

That's a good start.

Well, I like him.

He's a funny lad. He's very confident.

Yeah.

Shy little bugger when I adopted him, though.

He'd been with half a dozen foster families, so I've determined to keep him

happy.

Give him a stable home, like.

Probably why I've been single so long. Didn't want some random bloke flitting

and out of our lives.

But now, well, this feels a bit different.

Now, isn't that a pretty picture?

Yes, the eyelash has gone now, Carol. Oh, you two make a lovely couple. No

wonder your mother is so happy about it.

You have spoken to my mother?

I was supposed to say that then.

But a mare is like a priest. It will go no further.

Let's just say it's looking good for Easter slash summer 2017.

Sorry, what is?

Your wedding, of course.

She came in today to book it.

Anyway, I'll say no more.

Thank you.

Oh, my God. How did my mother find out?

I don't know.

But she's taking it pretty well, mate.

Carol, please be assured, I do not wish to marry you. Oh, well, thanks very

much.

Sorry, I mean, not yet.

Maybe we should just get married. Get it all over and done with.

I'm free at the weekend.

You are pretty easy to wind up.

You got me. You got me.

My favourite uncle.

My favourite niece.

Do you want a lift?

And park just over there.

Aye. You drive.

I'll drink.

Hmm. You all right?

Just meeting an old friend later on. Hey, I was thinking about catching up

your bears before I go. I didn't get a proper chance to say hello to Luke and

Emma. Oh, Emma's still in India, Prash.

And Luke's, um... Well, it's complicated.

Family, they say.

Last time I saw Luke, he'd have been this high.

Cynthia's wedding it was. Remember Cynthia?

The one with the face. The one with the face.

There were a load of kids getting me to do magic tricks.

Oh, the one with the coin.

That's the one. All the other Wayans were loving it.

I'd pull a 10p from behind their ear and they'd run off. But Luke, he just stood

there getting me to do it again and again till he knew how I did it.

Stubborn wee sod.

Nothing changes.

Kids, they're a worry for life, right?

What's that?

Oh, you still got it.

I need that back, actually.

Banjo!

Banjo! Banjo!

Banjo, wake up!

Banjo!

Banjo! Banjo!

Guess you got it all on film.

Oh, you beauty!

And

it's

uploaded.

Try it and see.

112 views. Get in.

I'll be off then.

Probably find a hostel. Or maybe...

Did you hear the thing about the wee dog?

In passing.

Oh, I nearly forgot.

Some journalist boat from the local paper rang.

Wanted to do a piece on you and me. Something about the lady mayor being

to a hero.

But I said no.

What? Why do you say no?

Because I'm moving on.

You can stay till the end of the week.

Dear love of my life, I saw this toy in the gift shop at the oil rig, and I got

it for little Genevieve.

They don't have much in the gift shops on oil rigs, just miniature oil rigs.

And are that, which I hope you'll find some use for.

I miss you both so much, and can't wait to hear everything you've been up to.

Yours forever and ever, and even longer than that, Carl.

Jack, you're meant to eat them, mate. Don't drop them on the floor.

Michael. Time for a quick chat?

Yeah. Sort of in the middle of breakfast, though. It's not about man,

know you're angry, but please, just hear me out. Go on, then. There's a mate of

mine from uni.

A few years ago, he fell out with his dad.

Proper shouting and screaming match. Yeah, don't tell me the dad died and now

your mate has to live with the regret.

Of course I'm going to talk to Dad again, Aunt Mum, just when I'm ready,

all. And what about their feelings, hmm?

Your dad's ill and your mum told you to call me. You can be a smartass if you

want to, Luke, but you're the one who's losing out.

I can't. And no, my friend's father didn't die, they just never spoke again.

Life's too short, don't you think?

Look, I've got to go.

Speak soon.

Morning.

A 17 -tiered cake.

layered with exotic fruits, with the bride and groom carved from ivory.

Mother?

Oh, yes, my darling boy.

I spoke to Auntie Brenda yesterday, and she congratulated me on my forthcoming

nuptials. That woman?

So it's true, then?

Yes, it's true.

And you approve?

It's the... Best thing that's happened to this family since your father died.

I'm so glad that you feel that way. But a wedding, that's a long way off.

As you wish. But why don't we have a meal tonight?

Just the three of us. Tonight? I know she lives a long way off, but... Not

really. And I'll pick her up, obviously.

What a gentleman.

Oh, you make me so proud.

I trust there will be no badness of blood between you and I, Stella?

Of course not.

Auntie Brenda can be... what's the word?

Very challenging.

Oh, on me.

No badness of blood.

Here we cock and roll!

Let's get un -shotted!

Auntie Vian wins them cash on the bingo.

All the fixes!

Cockety -cock!

I thought, well, if I'm going to have a baby shower, I want Stella to be a part

of it.

So here we are.

Just have it herself.

Anything in particular?

Sex on the beach.

Time. Test.

And the lime and soda for me, no way.

Bring them over when they're ready on a tray with some crisps.

Thank you.

Oh, Chief, I do hope you're the bastard stripper.

Sorry.

Nadine Bever.

Ivan Schloss. Schloss.

You all well?

Yes.

I've got baby club now.

Baby club every Tuesday afternoon, see.

It's a club for babies on Tuesdays.

Right, well, I take my leave.

Ivan.

So, it's just a little piece about Clem saving the dog.

Little piece? Half a page or so.

Sounds fair enough.

What part of Lady Mayor's husband risks his life to save a puppy, didn't you

hear? That's a double -faced spread right there.

We were thinking it was more of a small feel -good story.

Let me tell you a feel -good story.

It concerns a woman with a vision. A woman who gave up her career in the

business. so she could serve the people of Ponterbury.

You mean you.

Now, if you're sitting comfortably, then I'll begin.

Hiya.

You might want to go somewhere quieter, like an airport.

No,

I need a drink. I've been looking all over town for a job. Didn't think I

waltz right in, but there's literally nothing.

Hey, I tell you who might be taking on.

Ivan. Slosh.

Slosh. At the funeral parlour.

Serious? Yeah. I'm going to see him.

We're going to see him?

If nothing else, you might at least be able to hear yourself think.

Over it. I'm opening it. Over it.

That's all you'll be wearing from now on, love. There's no going back.

It's more than two big covers.

Oh, they've bloody happened.

There's too many...

Borky's making crisps, Alice.

Oh, God.

You all right?

No, I'm bloody wrecked to death.

Right. It's not cotton labour, is it? What?

It better better not be. I've still got a fortnight to go.

It's probably nothing, but you should get yourself up to hospital and get

yourself checked.

We'll call an ambulance, then. You don't need an ambulance.

Well, how am I supposed to get there?

Not having none of this lot drive me.

I think I'd better call Mike.

Why? He's got a beer for the birth.

Beyonce, you're not giving birth.

It's Braxton Hicks or indigestion.

I want to call Mikey.

Hello. It's coming, Mike.

It's coming. No, it's not.

Say again?

Our baby, it's coming.

Fuck.

Everything OK?

Yeah, just hang on.

Michael? Mike?

Michael? Stella, what's going on?

Everything's fine.

She's not giving birth. She's just been a drama queen. I'm not being a fucking

drama queen.

I'm taking her up for a check -up. I'll let you know if anything happens.

You just concentrate on your case.

You sure?

Yes, I am.

Go get him, Tiger. Go get him, Tiger.

Right.

Ready when you are.

That is why they do call it the Mayor Aunty Brenda feel -good factor.

I do bring smiles to people's faces.

Great. Well, I'm sure that'll be a wonderful story.

A wonderful story without a photo?

I'm afraid I don't have my camera with me. Maybe one of these will help.

Just a few stills I've kept through the years.

That's our wedding day. My old band played the wedding mart.

Rockin' day that was.

That's us on Brighton Pier.

And that's us with our first car.

Our little cabriolet.

Broken heater.

We had to generate our own warmth.

Do you mind if I borrow these?

We need more than half a page, though, good boy.

Oh, uh... I'm sure you'll get that.

And out we pop.

The good news is you're not in labour just yet.

See, I told you.

Just a little bout of Braxton Hicks.

Yeah, yeah, I thought it might be, but she insisted I come here.

In the middle of a party I was, and she dragged me away. I told her it was a

waste of time.

She's a nurse, you know.

Or supposed to be.

Oh, no signal, really.

Right.

Come on, you.

Oh, come on, pick up.

I'm hungry.

This is Rob Morgan.

Please leave a message.

Hiya, Rob, it's me. Can you call me when... I need breakfast, I did. Can you

shut up? It's a family bag.

It's the least you can do.

Are you making a friend?

He's not very well.

Well, I would be more sympathetic to him than you are to me.

Actually, I am. Because unlike you, he's genuinely ill.

So am I. He's pregnant.

He has got a serious heart condition. This is Rob Morgan.

Please leave a message. And he's still not picking up. So you're thinking,

he's lying there?

Can't get to the phone?

Call him.

Stella.

Stella. Only you can save me. Oh, shut up. Can you do?

You heard about it, didn't you? People lying there for days. No one coming.

And days and days sometimes they'd... Right.

Where are we going?

We

won't be long.

Have we got any biscuits or pot noodle or something?

Oh, that's the mince.

I do over.

Hate means they repeat on me.

Hiya.

Hello. I've been ringing.

I did knock.

Sorry. We were miles away.

Take a pew?

No, I can't stop long.

Just wanted to make sure you were all right.

Why wouldn't I be?

Rob.

It's OK.

Luke's in the picture now. About the test results, about everything. How do

feel about it?

I know.

Look, just because it's serious, it doesn't mean I'm going to pop my clogs

minute.

It just means that my heart could pack up at some point.

Maybe years from now.

Maybe never.

You could be with us another 20, 30 years.

40. Yeah, all right. You're not that young, mate.

We've just got to look after him, that's all.

Make sure he doesn't do anything stupid.

Like boxing.

Exactly.

Take up crown green bowling or dominoes. Aye. And eating the right stuff.

Yeah, I said that.

See, she'd listen to her. Very wise old woman, my ma 'am. Aye, you.

I've got to pick the kids up from playgroup.

See you tomorrow, yeah?

Oh, you'll see me.

See you, love.

So long.

You thought I'd had another restaurant moment, didn't you?

No, I just thought you were ignoring me.

That'll be my passenger.

Taxiing now, eh?

Long story.

So long.

Ta -ra.

Oh, God, it's come in.

You have got to get a grip, my girl.

You heard what the midwife said.

My waters are broken.

Rob!

Ambulance on its way.

I want to go to hospital. Get off me!

I need oxygen and drugs and I need Mike.

I'm not going to be able to run.

You won't get up them stairs much.

Slowly.

That's it. Easy does it.

Michael, it's me.

You know I should have let you know if something started happening.

She knows what she's doing, don't you, Stella? Well, I've had three of my own.

That must count for something.

I had a maternity module last term.

I've got a piece of that.

Can I put on some music? I've got a radio. Would that help?

Maybe get some hot towels and water.

Absolutely. Hot towels.

I'm not having him shave my bits.

A midwife once told me it gives the bloke something to do. It makes him feel

useful.

I need to push.

Right. Deep breath.

Deep breath. And now push really deep into your bottom as hard as you can. Oh,

push it.

Oh, I push it.

I push it with my arm.

I know what you're thinking, but you're wrong.

It was a moment of madness with that Ivan slosh.

It was just a kiss.

Didn't mean nothing.

And nothing is going to happen.

Ever. No way.

Which is why I can look at that trophy with my head held high.

It's a boy.

They was right then with the scan.

Yeah, they were.

Oh, part of me was hoping they were wrong. I know what to do with girls.

You can't go wrong with girls. We've got loads of girls in our family. But now

he's here, I'm really glad he's a boy.

Oh, Christ, he's beautiful, isn't he, Stan?

Thank you. Not that I didn't think we'd win, of course.

Never in doubt.

Good afternoon.

Good afternoon.

Cheers.

Excuse me.

You have one new voicemail.

Michael, it's me.

You know I said I'd let you know if something started happening?

Have you experience of relevant undertaking?

Well, I went to my Nana's funeral.

Does that count? No.

When we think about death, how should we feel?

Sad? No.

What's the cheapest type of coffin wood?

Pine?

No. When embalming a dead body... Ivan. Ivan.

I'm sure I won't know that either, but the thing is, I'm desperate.

I'll do anything. I'm a hard worker, I learn quickly, and I'll do any hours

you want, but please, just give me a chance.

Can you fix a Vexprint E400 inkjet printer?

I think so. Oh.

We used to have a similar one at the office where I was a tenth.

It was always jamming.

The manual of printing is a foreign language to me.

Yeah, they're dead confusing.

No, I meant literally. It is in Korean.

Oh.

Welcome aboard.

I'll follow you in the car. I won't be far behind.

Promise? You're coming.

Thank you.

You're amazing, you know.

I know.

I'm serious.

You just single -handedly delivered a baby.

A baby of the woman who had an affair with your boyfriend.

It wasn't an affair. It was a temporary loss of sanity.

You're a saint, Stella Morris.

I haven't always been, Rob Morgan.

Christ,

remember when Emma had Abra?

Only just got her there in time. Very dramatic.

She was off her head, bless her, on gaff and air.

And then he turned up like a lost soul.

I couldn't believe he was a dad.

And then Sean hit me.

Oh, yeah.

Because I kissed you.

I think I kissed you, actually.

I certainly kissed you back.

bit now, Rob.

This is quite awkward.

I know.

Fuck, what are we doing? Stella. No, this is all wrong and I've got to get to

the hospital.

Look at your tablet.

Are you on tablet? I forgot to ask. You're getting worked up. Nothing

I know.

Take your medicine and get some rest.

Don't start avoiding me now and being all weird, because it really was

I know.

I'll see myself out.

Stay in the dry. There's rain forecast, apparently.

And, of course, life as mayor is not always a bed of roses.

I've had to make sacrifices along the way.

Most days I miss Countdown.

But you know what?

I wouldn't be able to do all that I do without my rock.

Clem.

Always by my side.

Next question.

Ah, yes, the lady near the back with the cheap knitwear.

Mayor Aunty Brenda, perhaps you could tell us a little bit about today's

in the paper.

Well, I've been too busy serving my people to have seen the article, but I'm

hoping it was a double -cared spread.

Better than that, you're on the front page.

I have no choice but to suspend you as Mayor of Ponterbury pending a formal

investigation into questions of wrongdoing.

Have you anything to say?

That will be taken into account.

Your chain of office, please.

The chain, Auntie Brenda?

Cleaning needed here.

Everything is spick and span.

Mother, Carol is... Not needed. Where is my future daughter -in -law?

Freshening up. Freshening up? Well, she's come a long way.

Nina, there's obviously been some kind of a mix -up. But what Jagadish was

trying to say is that him and me are... Me and him are... Yes? Carol and I are

dating.

We're stepping out.

We are sweethearts.

What? I don't know...

Who you thought I was bringing to dinner, but actually, who did you think

bringing to dinner? Never mind.

It doesn't matter.

Carol is coming to dinner.

Now, what's for starters?

Sorry, we'll be in here. Leave a message and keep it real.

Um, hi.

It's me, Paula.

Hope you're okay.

So, the reason I'm calling is... It's Daddy.

He died last night.

And... Oh, God. I don't know what else to say.

Call me when you can, love.

Bye.

It's water.

You can pretend it's champagne.

Thank you.

Hello. Time to meet your daddy, baby Jay.

Stella delivered him, she did. Did you?

Don't look so surprised.

Only in a day's worth for Nurse Morris, isn't it, Stella?

Thank you.

Can I hear?

It's a man.

He's cute, isn't he?

He's gorgeous.

And you, are you all right?

Yeah, I'm a bit sore in the underground parking lot, but no, I'm OK. Thanks for

asking.

Hello.

Oh, you've got your nose lined.

Do you think?

Yeah. He looks like his dad, doesn't he, Sal?

Definitely.

Oh, by the way,

I'm going to call him Jackson.

Oh, right.

Jackson Evans.

Yeah, that's nice. No, he's having your surname, your dad.

That'd make him Jackson Jackson. I know, he's cool, right?

Mad.

What do you think, Phil?

Yeah, why not?

Jackson Jackson.

Actually, it's growing on me.

Wouldn't have been my first choice, but...

Right, stop arguing, Michael. Let Stella have a go.

No, you're all right.

You carry on.

Jackson.

And is he feeding yet? Yeah, he's been fine. He's really hungry.

All the time.

He's a big boy, isn't he? I know he is. He's a big boy, isn't he?

The funereal legend that was Daddy Simpson have died.

You were as beautiful to me now as you were at 16, Stella Lawrence.

You can't take Jackson to Magaluf. He's only two weeks old, man. I know.

That's why you're having him. I can't say.

You're on.

Bloody hell.

That's Robert Blunt.

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