All language subtitles for RuPauls.Drag.Race.S04E03.Glamazons.vs.Champions.1080p.WEB-DL.AAC2.0.H264-fabutrash.spa

(RuPaul)
Previously on
RuPaul's Drag Race....

Hey, kitty girl.

The weakest out of everybody,
I would say, is Sharon Needles.

Shut up!

(RuPaul)
Are you ready to experience
a female phenomenon?

Damn!

(Milan)
Madame LaQueer--she's not
as physical as the rest of us.

Oh!

[screaming]

Madame LaQueer,
Chad Michaels.

You are both the winners
of this week's challenge.

(Madame)
Oh, my God.
I feel so great.

I certainly actually
proved them wrong.

Attagirl!

The Princess...
shante, you stay.

Lashauwn, sashay away.

And tonight...

Music makes the people
come together.

The dolls
get a special guest...

- Who dat? Who dat?
- Hallelujah!

(RuPaul)
And testify.

All right.

(RuPaul)
With extra-special
guest judges

Natalie Cole
and Glee's Amber Riley.

I predict this will be
and unforgettable episode.

...of NYX Cosmetics,

a one-of-a-kind trip
courtesy of ALandCHUCK.travel,

headline Logo's Drag Race tour,

featuring Absolut Vodka--

cocktails perfected--

and a cash prize of $100,000.

And may the best woman win.

Welcome to RuPaul's Drag Race:
Season Four RuVealed.

Now get ready for a lip sync
that will leave you

kissing and pleasing
and hugging and squeezing

together forever
and ever and ever!

[laughs]

# May the best woman,
best woman win #

[tires squealing]

- Cheesecake.
(both) Cheesecake.

Is it gluten-free?

My baby's gone!
[wailing] My baby's gone!

Aww!

(Latrice)
All of my girls are gone.

This is the real deal.

If you're not on top
of your Ps and your Qs,

you'll be X'd.

It is getting real.

Princess, what was it like
to lip-synch for your life?

I just had fun with it.

If this is the last time
I'm on the stage,

I'm gonna soak it up.

Being in the bottom two
was ridiculously awful.

(all)
Awww!

(Princess)
So I need to step it up
a little bit more.

- Peace out.
- Deuces.

The bitch could sew.

She sure could.

She was very talented.

Well, she's gone now.

Man your stations.

Do you think you deserve
to be in the bottom?

No.

Who do you think deserved
to be in the bottom?

Jiggly.

I think if I were to do it over,

after the comment
that you said...

The thing is,
Princess is very Zen.

She's very quiet.

We needed to be, like,
crazy bitches.

I probably would go back
and say, "Jiggly can go."

Now, would you just say that
because she said something, or--

- [bleep] yeah.
- Drama.

[siren blares]

(all) Ooh!
(RuPaul) Ooh, girl!

She done already
done had herses!

Listen up, glamazons.

America's next drag superstar
is no one-hit wonder.

So if you want to live forever,
you've got to be a champion.

And with a little bit of love,

even a ladyboy
can be a cover girl.

And for the record,

those are all available
on iTunes.

[laughter]

[cheers and applause]

Hello, hello, hello.

(all)
Hi!

[cheers]

Ladies, for today's
mini-challenge,

we're gonna do a little
something different.

We're gonna do something
for someone else.

- Oh.
- Imagine that.

Now, I love making music.

And I'm honored whenever anyone

makes an online video
of one of my songs.

But there's one in particular
that really moved me.

And I want to share it with you.

[RuPaul's If I Dream]

# If I dream

# Everything I want to be

# If I dream

# All the possibilities

# If you just believe

# In your wildest dreams

# It will come true

# It will
come true #

That's Piyah Martell.

She was born
with caudal regression syndrome

that prevented her legs
from growing.

That hasn't stopped her
from dreaming big.

Piyah's always wanted to be
a part of RuPaul's Drag Race,

and I've invited her here today.

Oh, pit crew!

Hey, Piyah, girl!

- Wow!
- All right, Mama!

- Diva!
- Hello, my darling.

Mwah, mwah.

- [giggles]
- Now, Piyah, honey.

You were delivering such
Mariah Carey realness

in that video.

[laughter]

You're giving me life!

If you really do believe
in something,

you can't give up, you know?

And if you dream and dream,
one day, it can happen.

Piyah just went right
to my heart.

To see her pursuing her dreams,
it was very inspiring.

Our mini-challenge today
is inspired by you.

Ladies, Piyah has an online
following,

and she calls her fans
butterflies.

You're gonna create
a fashion-forward headpiece

that Piyah can wear
in her next video

with these colorful butterflies.

So, ladies, you need to pair up,
so pick a partner.

All right, so there's
an odd number of queens,

so that leaves Jiggly all alone.

Jiggly, you get to pick
which pair you'd like to join.

[chuckles]

Yes!
Get 'em, Jiggly!

The pretty girls.

- [laughs]
- Say it again.

Now, you've got 20 minutes.

Ready. Set.

- Go.
- Aww!

I guess they just
really like butterflies.

Run!
Give me that!

Ooh, yeah.

Oh, that's gorgeous.
Now we're cookin'.

Jiggly, just get that done.

This one's for Piyah, baby.

- Okay, ladies.
- Ugh, [bleep].

(RuPaul)
Time's up.

- You just have to hold it.
- Yeah, I know.

Let's see what you crafty
caterpillars have come up with.

The first headpiece is from
Milan and Latrice Royale.

The basis of making
the headdress

is to make sure
that you can actually wear it.

- Yes.
- We failed.

You took the words right out
of my mouth.

Sharon Needles
and Madame LaQueer.

- Yes.
- It's very royal wedding.

Pop a little veil on there,
and you're ready for a funeral.

[laughter]

From the house
of Chad Michaels and Willam,

very tasteful number there.

Is it fly, girl?

Don't be trying to mop it.

From the house of Dida Ritz
and The Princess.

I could see Mariah Carey
selling this on HSN.

[laughter]

And last and certainly
not least,

from the house of
Phi Phi O'Hara, Kenya Michaels,

and Jiggly Caliente,

it's a butterfly extravaganza!

So we wanted something
that was gonna be

as big and as beautiful
as her spirit

and represent her as a whole.

Love it.

So I will consult
with the client.

Tell me, darling.

Okay. All right.

And the winner of this
mini-challenge is...

Phi Phi, Kenya, and Jiggly.

[cheers and applause]

Let's see how it looks
on Piyah.

[growling]
Beautiful.

- Gorgeous.
- Ow!

[cheers and applause]

Piyah, your ride is here
to pick you up

like the queen that you are.

- Thank you, darling.
- Thank you.

- Bye, Piyah.
- Beautiful.

(RuPaul)
We can't wait to see
your next video.

Music makes the people
come together.

For this week's main challenge,

you'll be producing and starring
in infomercials

for my albums Champion
and Glamazon.

You'll need to sell each song
based on a personal memory,

like your first kiss
or your first time in drag.

Phi Phi, Kenya, and Jiggly,
you won the mini-challenge.

But, Phi Phi and Kenya,
you won the coin toss,

so you two will be
team captains.

Phi Phi, you are Team Champion.

Kenya, you're Team Glamazon.

All right, Kenya,
pick a queen.

Chad Michaels.

Phi Phi, your turn.

Sharon Needles.

What?

I'm not dumb.

[snickers]

Miss Willam.

Dida Ritz.

Milan.

Latrice the beast.
[growls]

Princess!

(RuPaul)
All right, two queens left,

Jiggly and Madame LaQueer.

Jiggly, get your butt
over here.

[giggling]

(Madame)
Again I got picked last.

I thought that Kenya was going
to go through for me.

(RuPaul)
And that means Madame LaQueer
is Team Glamazon.

- Oh.
- Going up.

I gave a hand.
She rejected it.

Even in sunny Puerto Rico,
there is shade.

(Madame)
So are the people
going to see

that the Puerto Rican girls
in the competition

does not help each other?

That's sad.
That is very sad.

Ladies, my entire recording
career is in your hands.

Gentlemen, start your engines,

and may the best seller win.

- [grunts]
- Oh!

God!

I just felt like I was
in the team of the busted.

How are you gonna put it all
out there?

I think I just haven't been
given the opportunity.

Well, I don't know about that.

Shante, you stay.
We'll be right back.

Now where were we?
Oh, right.

Our challenge today
is to make a infomercial

to sell RuPaul's albums Glamazon
and Champion.

I have a killer pimple,
and I did not know this.

So we had to make testimonials

depending on which song
we were assigned.

We had to have choreographed
dance, make costumes.

Do you have any
plastic necklaces?

Um, I have, like,
one turquoise one.

- You want it?
- Oh, no. No, no, no, no.

It has to be, like, darker.

Each team got assigned
a different album.

So we got Champion.

Are you guys gonna start
getting ready or not?

Well, do you want to start

doing choreography
and everything?

Oh, yeah, we have to do
our choreography.

[bleep].

- Girl.
- It's only a little snippet.

Have you listened to it?

Oh!

(Sharon)
It's every song off the album.

(Latrice)
Yeah.

An hour and a half
to do choreography,

plus do the costumes,
plus pick our pictures,

and memorize this song
and do a dance?

Mm-hmm.

That's why they call it
a challenge, girl.

Mm-hmm!

(Latrice)
Phi Phi is the team leader.

Definitely, there was a lot
of pressure.

We say the captain goes down
with the ship.

(Phi Phi)
Do y'all's face, like,
super fast,

so that way,
we can rehearse afterwards.

Can everyone be painted
in 30 minutes?

- In 30?
- Mm-hmm.

Just put some white powder
on your face and look gothic.

That's all we need you to do.

Phi Phi wants to call me goth

and wants to push me
into one small box,

which is a box she knows
nothing about.

I just felt like I was
in the team of the busted.

And I wanted to be
in the team of the dusted.

Okay, so what we need to do
is come up with a theme.

Maybe we try to put Glamazon--

our animals, our fears, costume
to that first and--

Yeah, but because
of our time frame,

we got to make sure
that everybody

can get something
that's universal.

Let's just decide to go on '80s.

I think we all knew that Kenya
had a language barrier.

So I decided to take control of
that situation and help Kenya.

We have to pick
our individual backgrounds

for our individual performance.

Okay, great.
Can you find humor in that?

You know what I'm saying?
Like--

- In clouds?
- Yeah.

Kenya is supposed to be
the team leader,

but Milan is stepping in,
and I'm sorry.

I don't think
it's the language barrier.

All tea, no shade!

You know, it's about this.
It's about, "Ha, ha, ha."

The first position
for the Superstar.

What is the first position?

It's, um...

# Gonna love you

# As you are

And next--next--

(Milan)
Let me sing through it.

I'll try to sing
as much as I can.

(Willam)
Milan kept talking over Kenya.

- Maybe I--
- Hold on, hold on, hold on.

Hold on, hold on.

It's getting old.
It's getting real damn old.

Hello, hello, hello.

Hi, RuPaul.

(all)
Hi!

I want to know how my
infomercials are coming along.

Come, Mother, come.

Well, hello, Team Glamazon.

- Hi, RuPaul.
- Hi, Ru.

Hi!

Willam, what song
are you gonna do?

I get to do Click Clack.

And you're a shoe queen,
aren't you?

I brought 34 pairs of shoes.

[mouthing words]

I have some great '80s shoes.

Is the whole group
dressing '80s?

- Yes.
- Whole group.

So, Captain Kenya,
how did you decide on '80s?

Personally speaking, I think,
as you listen to the album,

there's some '80s influence
going on.

We wanted to try to stay true
to the essence

and the influences of the album.

Kenya?
Who is in charge here?

Is it you or Milan?

- We decided to share it.
- Yeah.

(Milan)
Because, you know,
of the language barrier.

Right.

(Kenya)
I think that Milan
talked too much.

The English is not
my first language.

But I'm trying.

Princess, you've been known
here on the show

as sort of the quiet one,
the Zen one.

Right, right.

How are you gonna
put it all out there?

I think I just haven't been

given the opportunity
to do that.

Well, I don't know about that.

We've given you
a few opportunities.

You have an opportunity
right now to do it.

(Princess)
It just sucks to hear
that criticism...

Child, please!

Ain't no half-stepping
on RuPaul's Drag Race!

Well, well, well.
Team Champion.

(all)
Hi, Ru.

Phi Phi, you're captain again.

- I am captain again.
- How'd that happen?

- I'm just amazing.
- You are amazing.

[giggles]

So, Sharon Needles,
what song are you gonna do?

I'm going to be doing
Cover Girl.

- Cover Girl?
- Mm-hmm.

I'm going to be pitching it
to an alternative audience

who might think your music is,
uh, too dancy.

Wait a minute.
Ex-squeeze me?

Well, it is very dancy,
but it also, you know,

has other elements to it
that I think works

for all audiences.

Uh-huh.

Dida, what song are you doing?

I'm doing Stepford wife dancing
to RuPaul's Main Event.

And when she hears this song,

it reminds her of the fun
that she had.

Ah.

So maybe she was a Solid Gold
dancer in another life?

Maybe, maybe she was one of
a pole dancer back in the day.

[laughter]

Now, I'm gonna let you all
get to it, okay?

- Thank you, Ru.
- All right, bye.

Ladies, gather round.

Remember, you need to connect
with the TV audience.

Make 'em laugh.
Sell some product.

And pitch your heart out.

Oh, and one more thing.

Don't [bleep] it up!

- Okay.
- Amen.

- Bye, Ru.
- Bye, Ru.

Bye, Ru.

Are you ready
to move some units?

- [sniffs] I'm ready.
- Action!

When I first heard RuPaul's
Cover Girl--

Cut!
Next.

[RuPaul laughs]

Girl from the 6 train.

RuPaul's music...

Okay, I want, um,

a two-piece and a biscuit
and, um--oh!

We'll be right back.

Hi!

Here they are,
Team Glamazon.

The infomercial challenge
is kind of daunting

because we're doing
lots of different segments.

There's different outfits
to think about.

We have props for you,
if you like.

There's some Iron Fist shoes
which I designed,

and the pit crew
is also included.

You just got to return 'em
when you're done.

[laughter]

(Princess)
We're shooting the opening scene
of the infomercial.

Our team looks phenomenal
in our '80s looks.

And we are so ready to do it.

We're gonna do amazing.

(RuPaul)
All right, here we go.

Action.

[tango music]

Do the line.

Do the lines.

Awkward!

Now, I know you flubbed
a little bit,

but that's okay,
that's okay.

Just keep on going.

Hey, Chad.

Is that RuPaul's Glamazon?

Oh, my God.
It takes me so far back.

RuPaul's music--

Oh, [bleep].

Order all your favorites
and hits now.

The pit crew is standing by.

Uh, you read the--
the line wrong.

- Yeah, it's "Order now."
- Order now.

"Get all your favorite hits.

The pit crew is standing by."

Nobody gets their line right
the first time.

Order now,
and other favorite hits.

The pit crew is standing by.

All right, who's up next?

(RuPaul)
You tell me when you're ready.

- [sniffs] I'm ready.
- Action!

# Where my girls at

# Make your heels clap

# Where my girls at

# Make your heels clap

#

(RuPaul)
Milan is up next.

Before I listened to RuPaul's
Superstar, I was so emotional.

But after listening to it,

I found out that the greatest
love of all is inside of me.

[sudden silence]

(RuPaul)
Yo, you know,
that's another artist, actually.

(Michelle)
I was gonna say, but you're
pitching Whitney there.

Any bitch with common sense

knows you don't channel
Whitney Houston

in a RuPaul infomercial.

Thanks, Whitney.
We'll call you later.

- Look at you.
- She got bones.

No, these are just bones
from some, leopard--

(Michelle)
A leopardasaurus.

Yeah, some Roberto Cavalli
animal or something.

(Michelle)
Yes, from a yacht.

(RuPaul)
Yes. Love it.
All right, here we go.

Action!

# Stand up

# Light a fire up

# A revolution

# Get your rebel on

# Oh, oh, oh

Yeah, cut!

All right, Team Champion.

Phi Phi O'Hara.

She got a 40-ounce.

Girl from the 6 train.

Now it's our team's turn
to do the infomercial

to sell RuPaul's album Champion.

And...action.

# And I don't care #

# If people stare

Cut.

Give it all you got this time.

And...action.

# Yeah, up on the flashlights

# No, don't be #

(Phi Phi)
I feel amazing
during the shoot.

Ru's laughing.
Michelle's laughing.

I'm giving 'em, you know,
Phi Phi fierce the house down.

# Lookin',
don't be jealous of my boogie #

(RuPaul)
Action!

When I first heard Ladyboy,
my madam said,

"That's not soy sauce
in your panties."

Cut.
It's not what in your panties?

- Soy sauce.
- Oh.

(RuPaul)
Sell it.
You got to sell it, okay?

But that was--
that's--that's good.

"That is not soy sauce
in your panties.

That is happy endings.
Semen."

[laughs]
Oh, my God.

Honey, I just flooded
my basement.

Action!

When I first heard
RuPaul's Cover Girl,

I was covered in blood.

I was slaughtering
a sacrificial lamb.

Cut.

The thing here is,
if it's supposed to be funny,

make it funny.

- Let's do one more.
- Sure.

Phi Phi told me to do
just my spooky shtick.

Shtick it to 'em, Needles.

(RuPaul)
You have one take left.

Make it work for you, okay?

Okay.

Though I may dabble
in the black arts,

when I hear RuPaul's music,
I see the light.

(RuPaul)
Cut.

[sighs]
This is a mess.

One day, I was home making
a warm apple pie for my husband,

and Main Event came on
by RuPaul.

It reminds me of the main event

that happens in the bedroom
with my husband.

So you're making
a-a sexual innuendo there.

No.

I think you've got to sell that
a little bit more.

It reminded me
of the main event

that I was gonna get later
with my husband.

(RuPaul)
Cut.

I like to go as far as possible

and have the director
pull me back.

- Okay.
- You know?

Okay.

This is bad.
I'm feeling nervous.

I'm feeling scared.

I'm really screwing this up
right now in front of RuPaul.

It reminded me of the main event

that was gonna happen later on
with my husband.

[giggles]

(RuPaul)
Okay, cut.

We'll see you
on the flip side.

[alarm buzzing]

Rise and shine!

Your country breakfast
is ready!

All right, Mami.
Elimination day.

- Come on.
- No!

I'm so nervous about today.

Why are you nervous?

Because I was terrible.

I'm just shaking in my boots
right now

and preparing myself
for the worst.

I just felt like I was working
with a whole bunch of amateurs.

Sharon's scared because now

he's in the same boat
as all of us

and he doesn't have immunity.

And the only reason
why he's scared

is 'cause he didn't steal
the show.

I stole the show!

(Phi Phi)
I don't want to stress out
anymore

worrying about what Sharon
thinks of me.

I picked a character for her
that she can excel in.

She has one good character,
so she might as well use it.

Bitch, shut the [bleep] up.
This is my team.

Stir that pot!

In that video,
you looked uncomfortable.

Kind of freaked me out
a little bit.

You were extremely flat.

Did you work well
with Phi Phi?

She definitely didn't bring
a strong leadership role.

Okay, guys, now it's time
to untuck for a minute.

We'll be right back.

This may be the best episode
ever!

[laughter]

Who ready for some runway?

# Cover girl put the bass
in your walk #

# Head to toe

# Let your whole body talk

# And what

[applause]

Do you think I look
a tad underdressed?

- Whoo!
- Michelle Visage.

Hi, Mama.

- Hi, baby. How are you?
- Great.

I can see that you're
broadcasting in stereo tonight.

- Is there any other way?
- [chuckles]

Hey, Santino.

Or--or should I say shalom?

Ha, ha.
Shalom.

How about the beautiful
and talented Amber Riley?

- Welcome.
- Thank you.

I'm so excited to be here.

We're excited to have you.

I'm a big Gleek.

[laughs]

And nine-time
Grammy award-winning artist

Miss Natalie Cole!

Hello, love.

This will be unforgettable.

- It already is.
- Good.

This week, our queens
produced and starred

in TV infomercials
to sell my greatest hits.

And tonight, they're ready
to take a spin down the runway

in platinum and gold.

Gentlemen, start your engines.

And may the best woman win.

# Welcome to the show

London, Paris...

Milan.

(Santino)
Solid Gold dancer.

(Michelle)
Darcel, her name was.

(RuPaul)
And Altovise Davis, honey.

(Milan)
I'm going for the gold, baby.

Jackie Joyner-Kersee
has nothing on me.

(Michelle)
She's gonna make your wishes
come true.

(Natalie)
You work it, girl. Work it.

Hair on fleek!

(RuPaul)
Miss Thing.

Ooh.

Miss Chad Michaels.

(Santino)
It's Jem and the Holograms.

(RuPaul)
Fabulous. Solid Gold.

(Chad)
I just had the idea
to paint my forehead gold

and really try to emulate
the Versace medallion,

the Medusa head.

- Live from Caesars Palace.
- Okay.

(Michelle)
The price of gold has just
gone up, hasn't it?

(RuPaul)
Ooh, yes, it has.

Wow.

Willam. Glamazon.

(Santino)
Break these chains.

(RuPaul)
My goodness.

Chain, chain, chain.

(Willam)
My theme was
Clash of the Titans,

if Clash of the Titans
was set in a strip club.

(Michelle)
Oh, look, Willam's
a little cheeky tonight.

(RuPaul)
Yes, I think I could see
her pink Cadillac.

[laughter]

All right, Sharon Needles.

She's Greased Lightning.

- Serving T-bird.
- Yes.

(Michelle)
Cha Cha Digregorio's
got nothing on us.

(Sharon)
I'm not afraid
to look bizarre,

and when I look bizarre,
I feel beautiful.

(RuPaul)
She's serving Elvis
and Elvira.

She's Elvirus.

And it's contagious.

Oh, Phi Phi O'Hara.
Yes.

(Michelle)
Vanessa Williams right here.

(Natalie)
Yes, yes.

(RuPaul)
Sparkle, Phi Phi. Sparkle.

(Phi Phi)
I love my look.

My hair kind of looks swooped
like an ice cream cone.

Trying to serve the judges

Beyoncé-meets-the-Jetsons
realness.

(RuPaul)
She's serving Jiffy Pop
after the show.

(Amber)
Okay.

(RuPaul)
Madame LaQueer.

(Santino)
Cut it out.

[Michelle laughs]

(RuPaul)
Yes, she is serving
some space couture.

Yes, Mama.

(Madame)
I'm going with
an outer space look,

and it's good because
I like to be different.

(RuPaul)
Space: the final LaQueer.

The Princess.

(Santino)
Uh-oh.

- Wait--uh--what?
- Uh--

She stole my look.

Gagging!

(Princess)
I like showing off my body,
my curves,

with an element of androgyny.

I definitely think it's a bold
choice to go without a wig.

(Michelle)
Bold is beautiful.

(RuPaul)
Yes, it is.
Look at that ass.

(Natalie)
I'm telling you.

(RuPaul)
Your ass is mince, Princess.

[Michelle laughs]

(RuPaul)
Jiggly Caliente.

Serving heavy gunmetal chick.

(Michelle)
There's an asteroid headed
straight for planet Ru.

(RuPaul)
Uh-oh. Duck and cover.

(Jiggly)
The look is right.

Catch my shades.

I look sick.

(RuPaul)
I said wild women do.

- Amen.
[laughter]

- And they don't regret it.
- No.

(RuPaul)
Dida Ritz.

Oh, runway realness.

Supermodel.

(Dida)
Look at these legs.

I'm pummeling the runway.

I am serving Naomi Campbell
realness.

(RuPaul)
Oh, and what an impressive
bumper she has.

(Michelle)
And she ain't afraid
to show it.

- No.
- Not at all.

(RuPaul)
Latrice Royale.

There's gold
in them there hills.

[Michelle laughs]

(Latrice)
I want this short little dress

to show off my gorgeous legs
and hips and curves.

Body beautiful, of course.

(Michelle)
24-karat realness.

(RuPaul)
Yes.

I'll have a Latrice Royale
on the rocks.

Shaken, not stirred.

Kenya Michaels.

She's serving
some R2-D2 realness.

"C-3P-ho."

(Kenya)
I tried to mix the high couture
with the fantasy.

I feel amazing.

(RuPaul)
In space, no one can hear you,
queen.

[Michelle laughs]

Welcome, ladies.

It's time to debut your
RuCo Records infomercials.

I am so excited.

Team Glamazon.

# Do it, do it

# Oh

Hey, Chad.

Is that RuPaul's Glamazon?

Like, oh, my God, wow.

That takes me so far back.

RuPaul's music brings back
so many good memories.

It's hard to choose just one.

You know what, Princess?

Luckily, you don't have to.

Oh, my God!

# Gonna love you

# As you are

Before I listened
to Superstar,

I was totally spastic.

But now that I listened to it,
I feel totally tubular.

# As you are

[Hispanic accent]
Hello, Papi.

I don't speak very much English.

[speaking Spanish]

Y trust me.

Do you remember your first time?

# We are all stars

# That was then

Oh, my God, you guys.

The first time I heard
RuPaul's song The Beginning,

I was spray-painting
my ex-boyfriend's car

with vulgarities.

What a jerk.

That was the beginning
of an awesome

and gnarly new life for me.

# Every day

# Light a fire up

When you are in a competition
that no one speaks Spanish,

you think, "[bleep],
no entiendo nada."

But in that moment,
awake the beast.

Get your rebel on, and fight.

# Get your rebel on

# Everybody, everybody

# Do you hear that

Wearing high heels
was getting so ho-hum

until I heard Click Clack.

Now it's the soundtrack
to my life.

# If I dream

Do you feel like you've come
to the end of your road?

At one time, I did too,

until I heard
RuPaul's If I Dream.

And now I know anything
is possible.

# They will come true

# They will
come true #

# We gonna work that sexy

Order now.

Get all your favorite hits.

The pit crew is standing by.

(all)
Get Glamazon on Amazon!

Woo-hoo!

# Glamazon-on-on-on

[laughs]
Ahh!

[Valley girl voice]
Oh, my God, you guys.

Gag me with a spoon.

If I had a nickel.

(Princess)
Perfect. Awesome.

I don't think we could've done
anything better.

I don't like the outfit.

There's something a little tacky
about it.

It reminds me of fungus.

What'd you just call me?

...reach the top
of the charts.

We'll be right back.

Hey, we're back! But weren't
those commercials great?

The infomercial
for Team Champion.

[upbeat dance music]

Hey, Vampira.

Isn't this, like, this, like,

uh, RuPaul Champion album
or somethin'?

Oh, RuPaul's music
always brings me back.

You know what, girl?

Like, there's so many songs

that, like, have so many
good memories

that it's hard to, like,
pick one, you know, Mamas?

Luckily, now we don't have to.

[laughs wickedly]

# Ladyboy, lady girl

# This is for my girls

When I first heard Ladyboy,
my madam said,

"That's not soy sauce
in your panties."

# Little ladyboys and girls

# Little lady, ladyboys

# You know the world
don't have to end #

One day, I was home making
a warm apple pie for my husband,

and then Main Event came on
by RuPaul.

It reminded me of the main event

that I was gonna get later
with my husband.

# Dancing to your soul

Children, when I heard RuPaul's
Never Go Home Again,

I know that there was something
out there better waiting for me.

# Always in your heart

# Turn it up

So look.

Every time I'm walking
down the street,

all these mamisare like, "Ooh,
girl, your ass is too fat."

I'm like, "Look, don't be
jealous of my boogie."

# You can say
that you are not #

# But I always
see you looking #

# Stroll down the runway

When I heard RuPaul's
Cover Girl for the first time,

I was covered in blood.

And though I may dabble
in the black arts,

when I hear RuPaul's music,
I see the light.

# Cover girl

# Put the bass in your walk

# Head to toe

# Let your whole body talk

# You're a champion #

# And you'll always be a hero #

(all)
Available on iTunes!

Whoo!

And it still is.

[loud cheers and laughter]

That was dragnificent, ladies.

If I were watching back at home,

I would place my order
right now.

Operators are standing by.

I mean, really.
Do it now.

All right, ladies.

You produced
your infomercials as teams.

But tonight, you'll be judged
as individuals.

[suspenseful music]

When I call your name,
please step forward.

Milan.

Willam.

Latrice Royale.

Jiggly Caliente.

Phi Phi O'Hara.

This week,
you did not reach...

Oh, no!

You are safe.

[exhales]

That gets me
every single time.

#

Ladies, you represent
this week's hits and flops.

And now it's time
to face the music.

Madame LaQueer.

Hello. Hola.

Let's go to Natalie Cole.

I love your essence.

But I don't like the outfit.

When I hear gold and platinum,
I think classier.

The color green reminds me
of fungus.

In the video in the pitch,

little bit too much Spanish,
so remember that.

I think you were being true
to yourself, though,

with the Spanish.

- It was really funny.
- Thank you.

But I think that that's a place
where you're comfortable.

I would encourage you to kind
of push yourself a little bit.

- Next up, Chad Michaels.
- Hi, Ru.

I think you're
an amazing actress.

I thought it was just
the right amount of trashy,

tongue-in-cheek.

You do everything flawlessly
from beginning to end.

It's obvious.

I want to see you let go
of that perfection.

I want to see more
of who you are.

Princess.
Love the look.

Thank you.

Le duh!

...really at the same level
as Chad Michaels'.

You were extremely flat.

We've told this to you before.

You've got to be aware
of going above and beyond

and out of your comfort zone.

You in particular, Princess.

Kenya Michaels.

Hi.

You come out here
in this directional ensemble.

I was just, like,
following every curve.

I really loved
your performance.

It was so sick
that it was right.

(RuPaul)
Thanks, Kenya.

Dida Ritz.

(Santino)
Hey, Dida.

I love your ensemble tonight.

Your body is amazing.

I wondered why you chose

the character you played
in the video.

(Dida)
I wanted to do
something different.

Tall, leggy, sexy Dida
is kind of something

that I don't want
to get comfortable doing.

It's good that you did
take a risk,

but you looked uncomfortable,
and if you're gonna

do something out of your
comfort zone,

you have to commit to it.

The plot thickens.

Next up, Sharon Needles.

Tell me about your
infomercial presentation.

Did you work well with Phi Phi?

She definitely didn't bring
a strong leadership role.

Basically, what she said is,
"You're spooky.

Dress like a monster."

But I used it as a way
to sell your records.

Well, you do spooky very well.

- Boo.
- [whimpering]

I didn't even get
the name right away.

[laughter]

It just went whoop,
right over my head.

All in the past, Miss Cole.

Okay.

You know, so I'm right there
with you, but anyway.

- Well, yes, um--
- [laughs]

The presentation was eerie

and all that you wanted it
to be.

It kind of freaked me out
a little bit.

I really liked it.

(Santino)
I love that Swarovski crystal
pompadour you got on.

But I wish I couldn't see
the lower half of your body.

It kind of looks like
a store-bought thing.

(RuPaul)
Well, ladies, I think
we've heard enough.

While you enjoy
an Absolut cocktail

in the Interior Illusions
Lounge,

the judges and I
will deliberate.

You may leave the stage.

All right, just between
us girls, who is your favorite?

- I go with personality.
- Yeah.

(Natalie)
I think that Sharon Needles
has got a great sense of humor.

(RuPaul)
Uh-huh.

For me, it's between
Sharon Needles

and Kenya Michaels.

I really like Kenya.

She has less of a handle
on the English language,

but she was able to just
push through it

and just have fun.

Yes.
She sold it.

It was from the heart.

You felt that she wanted
to bring out the inner beast

and get her rebel on.

Chad is my absolute favorite.

She's so glam and so seasoned.

I couldn't keep my eyes off her.

I just kept staring at her
the whole time.

(RuPaul)
Okay.

Now, here is the hard part.

Who are the bottom two?

You know,
I would kind of have to say

Princess and Madame LaQueer.

Princess and Madame LaQueer.
And why?

(Natalie)
Madame LaQueer, she's just
not quite ready for prime time.

And although Miss Princess' look
is great,

we're talking about bringing
people that are gonna win...

Yes.

Because they're already
so close.

I don't think she's that close.

The Princess--I'm getting
nothing from her.

I think I'd like to see more
from Madame LaQueer.

- She's a fierce queen.
- Yeah.

I'm gonna have to say Dida.

I just don't know.

I'm confused by her 'cause
the walk on the runway--

That walk is saying,
"I am here. I am fierce."

But the video--

I think Dida thought
that the costume

was gonna do the work for her.

Right, I don't think
she understands

that that walk that she displays
on the runway

can be transferred
into every challenge,

into her everyday life.

I like to see people
who are the [bleep]

and know they're the [bleep].

No apologies.
No apologies.

All right.
Silence!

I've made my decision.

Bring back...

my girls.

An epic lip sync
coming up next.

[laughs]

[suspenseful music]

(RuPaul)
Welcome back, ladies.

I've made some decisions.

#

Sharon Needles.

You went to the dark side...

again...

and delivered another
sparkling performance.

- Condragulations.
- Yes!

(RuPaul)
You're the winner
of this challenge.

Attagirl.

(RuPaul)
And you'll receive
costume jewelry

courtesy of
fiercedragjewels.com.

Who won the main challenge
this week?

Oh, yeah, me.

Again.

Like a nightmare come true.

Slay!

I'm just such a loser back home.

It's--or that's
how I'm perceived,

and it's just great
to hear you say that.

Thanks.

Sharon, you may step
to the back of the stage.

Thank you.

Chad Michaels, Kenya Michaels,
you're safe.

#

Madame LaQueer...

#

You're safe.

#

Dida Ritz.

The Princess.

I'm sorry, my dears,

but you are both up
for elimination.

Not again.

It's kind of upsetting

because I felt like
I put myself there.

(RuPaul)
Two queens stand before me.

Ladies, this is your last chance
to impress me

and save yourself
from elimination.

The time has come...

for you to lip-synch
for your life.

Watch and learn.

Good luck.

And don't [bleep] it up.

[This Will Be playing]

This will be
an epic lip sync.

# An everlasting love

# This will be

# The one I've waited for #

# This will be

# The first time anyone

# Has loved me

# Oh, oh, oh

# I'm so glad #

# You found me in time

# And I'm so glad that #

# You rectified my mind

# This will be

# An everlasting love

(Dida)
Natalie Cole is sitting
right in front of me.

I have to do it for her.

I don't want her to leave
saying,

"That drag queen did
a horrible job with my song."

# You've given me #

# The thrill of a lifetime

# And made me believe

# You've got more thrills #

# To spare, oh

# This will be

# An everlasting love

# Oh, yes, it will, now

[laughs]

# This will be

(Natalie)
Yeah!

# You and me

- Come on!
- # Yes, sirree

Well!

# Eternally

# So long as I'm living #

# True love I'll be giving #

# To you I'll be serving #

# 'Cause you're so deserving #

Ah!

# You're so deserving #

# You're so deserving, yeah #

Whoo!

# Yeah, yeah

# Whoa, oh, oh

# Love, love

# Love

# From now on, from now on

# From now on

(Latrice)
That is what a lip-synch
for your life is, baby.

That is high drag
at its finest.

# From now on

[cheers and applause]

Wow.
That was amazing.

I've made my decision.

Dida Ritz...

shante, you stay.

Thank you.

That's the queen I want to see
from now on.

From now on, queen.

From now on.

I promise.

- You may join the other girls.
- Thank you.

(RuPaul)
The Princess.

Even though your time here
has been brief,

you will be forever
Drag Race royalty.

Long live The Princess.

Thank you.

Now sashay away.

[applause]

I'm not the type
to get upset or angry,

but I don't think it was right
to send me home.

This competition will definitely
be missing something

not getting to see the rest
of what I had to offer.

My top ten, condragulations.

And the hits
just keep on coming.

Now, if you can't love yourself,

how in the hell you gonna love
somebody else?

Can I get a amen up in here?

(all)
Amen!

All right, now,
let the music play.

Byeee!

# This is the beginning
of the record you like #

#

# Get it, get it

# Get get get it,
get it right #

# This is the beginning

# The beginning

# This is the beginning
of the rest of your life #