Original subtitles

(song playing)

Shivi, could you pass me the bread?

Thanks. -Hey, fatty!

If you eat so much, you'll drown in the pool.

Shivi, don't start in the morning.

Till mom finishes her coffee,

there's a curfew, guys. I have to remind you everyday. -Ya.

Mom, my swimming costume?

Everything is ready. Just put it in your bag.

I'll come to the club on the way to the restaurant.

Just to run the accounts counts. Bye. -See you!

Are you going to eat all of this? Yeah. - Guys, eat fast! -

Kunal?

Close your eyes.

Open them.

Did I forget a special day?

Not everything is about you. Okay?

Just open it.

Wow! Flashy!

Whats the occasion?

Do you need a reason to be happy?

You know, since the past few weeks

I was

behaving like a little psycho, so I thought...

Oh! This is a bribe.

Whatever you say.

Isn't it a bit young.

I look like 24-year-old biker boy.

Maybe, I want to see you like that.

That means you want to change me.

People have various kinks and fantasies.

What's the problem with my old self?

In order to carry this new look, I'll have to go to the gym.

Listen to me.

Don't take too long. Can't handle this for long.

Of course. -Bye! -Bye!

Take that off!

Take it off! -Dad!

You walk around like an idiot!

That's why you don't have a girlfriend!

I'm 16 years old.

When I was your age

I had many girlfriends!

I mean, literally!

Mom?

Mamma’s boy! Mom! Go!

Mama!

Dude, your dad needs civic lessons.

Then why don't the two of you go together?

Very funny!

F**k off, dude! -Get him!

Go!

Kunal, come on!

You're working here as well.

He's just reading a review.

Preet has given the restaurant a solid review.

Is he the same Preetam

who wooed Rati

right under your nose, right?

His name is Preet, not Preetam.

Nihal is talking as though

he's waiting to woo Rati.

Guys, can I please read my review in peace?

Yes! -So, Kunal,

are they a couple

or just...

I don't know, Rafia.

But what I saw the other day

they seemed like a couple! -Listen to this.

Look.

The transcendental fusion flavors

of the genius at Saffron

brought to us by the charismatic duo of

creative genius Sakshi

and the undeniable grit of her partner Kunal

are a treat for all.

Cheers to that! -Just a minute. -Cheers.

Can you repeat the question, please?

Cheers! -Really lovely!

He's praised you a lot.

Did he like the place, Kunal? I think he did.

Kunal, weren't you saying something the other day,

about the conference... -Shlok!

What happened?

Hey, fatty! Suck in your tummy!

Shut up! -Hey, bro!

This phone has the best camera, okay!

Just use the other filter! -Okay.

Whoa!

What the f**k, dude! -Hey, bro! Give my phone back!

See, Jhanvi. I told you!

This guy... -Shivi, stop! Respect his privacy!

Shlok, do you watch this together?

No! -Men on men? -Hey, bro!

They are just these pop-ups.

I opened a site and... -Hey, guys!

It's fine! It's fine!

Shivi, just f**k off!

F**k you, dude! I'm not sick like him. -Shivi?

Stop! -I was watching normal porn, okay?

Say it louder! -Stay away from my phone!

And you stay away from me, you fucking faggot! -Hey!

Shivaay, out of the water now!

I mean it, now! Shlok, come on!

F**k off!

Why does he always use bad words for gays?

Because they're disgusting!

Why but? Why is it so?

Mom, I think he's going to confess now.

I have to come out. I'm a fag! -Shivi!

You're sick. -And you're disgusting!

Enough, both of you!

Shivi, this is totally wrong.

You have to be sensitive.

There are different people, it's their life and choices.

I had read somewhere that it's

not even a choice.

That's what they are.

When they can't help themselves,

I think we should understand.

Isn't it, mom? -Yeah.

Seriously, dude! Men kissing men?

Mom, it's just sick. It's really disgusting.

You know what, you are sick.

You have such sick thoughts.

Everyone else is just living their lives, man!

And by the way,

I like girls.

Not that it should matter.

Wow! That's so cute.

But the question is, do girls like you?

Faggy braces boy! -Shut up!

Shivi, bullying, body shaming,

bigotry. At least spare someone!

Ved, nothing happens if someone else says it.

If you wanted to say something

then you could have. -I'm fine.

See for yourself.

Your choice is just...

I'm on your side!

You don't have to act like a creep just to be one of those boys.

I am a boy!

Should I prove it? -Shut up!

I know you're a boy.

And you're a cool guy and a good gamer.

But dad doesn't feel the same.

He thinks that gaming and

poetry is just a chick thing! -Poetry? What?

Slam! -No way! Wait!

We've got to do this! -No, I'm fine.

No, I've got an idea. I'll arrange

everything. Don't worry about it, okay?

Bye, got to go! -Jhanvi, listen...

I'm not your school project.

You are, you just don't know it yet.

My own son hates us.

Did he tell you that?

I mean, if you must know, his exacts words were,

'Gays are so yuck.'

It's not his fault. That is how people think.

Can I have an espresso please, and

a frappe. -Not too strong, please.

Why don't you just give him milk.

You are insulting your coffee.

Judge me all you want!

There's something in my bag.

Check it out.

(song playing)

There you go, your frappe with less milk.

Shit! It's our anniversary today, right?

Happy shitty anniversary to you too.

I'm so sorry, man.

Hope you like them.

I love them.

Let people call it what they want,

it's been a beautiful three years for us.

How can you girls drink this?

What? We have to maintain ourselves as well.

Oh!

You are very well maintained.

But I do crave sometimes.

Exercise once again.

Are you gifting me a gym membership?

What? -Yes.

Only then I can maintain myself, right?

You will look good on a cross trainer.

Forget it.

I don't think I can afford it.

Afford?

Just order. -Really? -Yes.

Then give me cash.

I will sign up for the gym membership, spa,

and

skin glow facial too. That's a good idea.

Tuesdays are the worst!

It's a slow night at the restaurant, but I still have to go!

What do I do?

I mean...

Just skip it!

How about ladies' night?

Aunt Sakshi, I have an idea.

Please, please say yes.

At least tell us your idea first.

Mom, aunt Sakshi knows that

my ideas are more responsible than your ideas.

That's true.

Okay, you're right.

Okay, thanks.

Aunt Sakshi, can we do an impromptu comedy night

in your restaurant? I promise you it will be lit!

(song playing)

By the way, Ved,

all the very best. I'm sure you're going to kill it.

Yeah, bro!

Don't you think this poetry and all

it's too sensitive for you. -It's out of syllabus for you, right?

What? Poetry? -No, sensitivity!

Oh!

Ya.

Come on!

So, hello everybody!

Welcome to Saffron Open Mic!

Everybody is discussing stereotypes these days.

So, I thought, as a rebel with a loudmouth,

I should honor my stereotypes.

So here I am telling you some sarcastic jokes

like our nerdy boy

will recite poetry today!

Nerdy boy!

Give it up for Ved!

Some boys can't stomach this fact

that a boy can recite poetry.

Do you know what's the issue?

When we human left our caves

these boys didn't get the memo.

Then there are the worst kind of male stereotypes.

The bigots and the homophobes.

These are the boys

who don't want to cry

because it's not macho enough!

But will spend three hours on... -Yeah, bro!

Hair gel just to get that spike right.

Why? Because raising their hair

is equivalent to raising something else.

Woo-hoo!

Woo-hoo!

Say it like it is, Jhanvi!

They doubt their own manhood

that they get jumpy with the slightest

touch of their own friends.

Like, chill, dude! You aren't such a stud

that no man, woman or child

can't resist your touch.

I know! - I mean,

gay men have taste.

They're gay, not desperate.

That is correct!

And then, there is this thing,

yuck, I can't imagine two guys at it!

Dude, when you look at a straight couple,

do you instantly imagine them in bed?

Like what even?

By the way, my mom is not like that.

Her dating life

was my practice test.

Oh!

My mom dated some hot,

good looking rich men.

And how many? - Thank you.

So, I learned from her

that it's better to date educated men.

Superb! - Thank you.

So, I dated a sensitive

bearded brooding boy and guess what?

Experiment fail.

He turned out toxic as well. -Oh, baby!

Big hug, pup!

Alistair, I hope the drinks are going to everybody. -Yes.

I hope the kids are getting not getting alcohol.- Yes.

I mean, only juice. -Yes.

Then I feel that I've learned one lesson in life.

After a line of toxic men,

if these women are still straight,

if they still long for a man, then dude,

this is proof that sexuality is not a choice.

Well said, Jhanvi!

Rafia that jacket. You know what, I am so stupid. I will come back and explain.

No, I was...

You know what? I'm just out for some fresh air. Don't worry.

I'm coming. Okay? -Sakshi, hello?

Can you hear me? - Hello!

What? I can't hear you! Hello? -Hello?

Hey...

It's not a bad idea to meet in the public.

As you say.

The food was good, right? -Yeah.

What's funny when you were trying to pretend.

You think a lot about people, but you know that nobody really cares.

I care.

But yeah, I had a really good time.

I'm glad you did.

Stop at the cigarette shop.

Ma'am, shall we go?

What?

Yes.

They say,

be who you are.

But they don't have the courage to meet me.

They say, do what you feel is right,

but they lack the strength to hear.

I'm not quiet,

but

I never said it as well.

The person I see in the mirror daily

perhaps is someone else.

Not me.

I look at myself in the mirror

and I tell myself.

That it's not you.

Hide yourself from you.

Nobody has the courage to accept you.

They say, be who you are.

But they don't have the courage to meet me.

(song playing)