Original subtitles

Ubume This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons or organizations is purely coincidental.

Ikkou.

Did you finish?

Not yet.

I can't help it! I'm doing it alone after all!

Haruka's not coming...

She's most likely still asleep.

222...

Quit sleeping all the freaking time!

Today I'm going to tell her up front!

Everyone's doing well?

Yeah, I don't mind them changing a little if it's in a good way.

Again with that.

I invited Haruka, but...

She didn't want to come?

She didn't say that...

...but I guess that's what it is.

Well, it seems like she doesn't like me too much.

She used to be a good girl who didn't need much.

I even changed her diapers.

Gosh... What a girl...

Don't act spoiled, dear Amaenaide yo anata

Stay like this, on the other side of our dream Konomama yume no kanata

I won't say it to you just yet... Mada anata ni wa oshienai

Ah My Buddha!! I won't say it to you just yet... Mada anata ni wa oshienai

Ah My Buddha!!

Ah My Buddha!! Katsu!!!

Do buds that wait for the spring... Haru wo matsu tsubomi wa sugu ni

...bloom up right away? Fukurandeyuku no ka na

Loosen your hand... Kataku nigirishimeta

...that you've closed up so tightly Tenohira wo hodoite

And feel the wind that carries the seasons along Kisetsu hakobu kaze wo kanjite yo

Don't act spoiled, dear Amaenaide yo anata

Stay like this, on the other side of our dream Konomama yume no kanata

Pull me close with those hands, Me ga sametara kiechaisou na

As though I'll disappear when you open your eyes Watashi wo sono te de hikiyosete

The feeling that blooms in my chest Kono mune ni saku omoi

The feeling I keep secret in my heart Kokoro ni himeta omoi

Yeah, yeah, yeah

I won't say it to you just yet... Mada anata ni wa oshienai

But I want to tell you Demo anata ni wa oshietai

I can't love anyone else but you Mou anata shika aisenai

Don't Cry!!

Saienji Temple

Hey, stop crying!

What are you doing, Yuko? Hey, stop crying!

Good morning.

You're late, Haruka.

Sorry.

So what's going on?

This baby was abandoned.

Left outside the gate.

An abandoned child, huh...

Hey, shouldn't we report this to the police?

But maybe his mother will have a change of heart and come back.

I'd feel bad making the baby go back and forth between places.

But if Lady Jyotoku comes back, we'll end up reporting this anyway.

So for at least the time being...

Jeez, I won't be responsible for this.

But...

Sakura's not the motherly type.

You're one to talk!

I think it's better for us to report the baby though...

Well, do what you want.

Um... Um, when they won't stop crying...

You still can't figure it out?

H-Hold on... For now, try to comfort him!

Peekaboo!

Look, it's Kamen Ranger 21, you know?

This ranger doesn't ride a bike!

A monkey and Devilkin.

The kid's not stopping at all.

Boo!

The mysterious Squid Man is with him this time!

A weird haniwa and Devilkin.

He won't quit crying!

A river of tears.

The monster is here too! A river of tears.

The monster is here too! I'm back!

You're late!

I couldn't help it! You're late!

I didn't know where they sold child-care goods!

Here it is! They won't stop crying when they're hungry!

Ikkou, the food!

Okay!

Um, the early weaning period, five to six months...

Middle weaning period, seven to eight months...

Final weaning period, nine to eleven months...

How many months old is this baby? How many months old is this baby?

Like I know!

When they won't stop crying...

The diapers! Change the diapers!

Roger!

For boys...

For girls...

For adults...

Which one is this baby?

Like I know! We have to check!

W-We have to check...

How?

You have to look.

For real?

No way!

This is no time to be embarrassed.

He's a boy.

He has a fine specimen on him.

Man, it's my first time seeing it for real, but...

It's cute.

An elephant.

Jeez, as a fellow man, I can't just sit here! I'll do it!

He finally calmed down.

Man, what a handful he was.

But he's so cute.

Now's the only time they're cute.

Once they're older, they start acting all smart towards you.

When they hit adolescence, they start becoming rebellious.

They'll only ask you for money, baths, and food then.

And steal money from your wallet and stay out without permission.

In the end, the one son you took care of...

...will be taken away by some chick whose only good quality is youth!

That isn't fair!

S-Sakura...

The type who can't break away from her child...

If I have a child, I want to live in the countryside and live an easy life.

I'll raise my child without a care, surrounded by nature.

That sounds nice.

You're overly optimistic. Living in the country isn't that easy!

Social relationships are actually harder in the countryside.

They don't accept outsiders that easily.

Really?

That's right!

And these days, you should rethink raising your child without a care.

Right, there are entrance exams for joining preschools.

You have to be prepared for that from a younger age.

You don't have to make them study so hard so early...

You're optimistic too.

Okay, on the flip side, making them study early on is a plus for the kids.

If they get accepted to an escalator-format school...

...they don't have to study for exams when they're older.

Making them suffer when they're young so they'll have it easy later...

This is a parent's love too.

That's right. Being carefree is a parent's ideal after all.

Did you know there's a cram school for exam studies?

Yeah, and the parents' personalities are another focus of the interview.

Y-Yuko...

She's very much an...

...educational mome-zilla.

Chitose, what if you had a child?

Me? I'd like it...

...to be normal.

I don't care if we don't have much money or if my child's not studious.

As long as we can get along and live together...

I'm Daddy!

What's wrong?

N-Nothing...

Were you imagining a sweet married life with a certain someone?

Yuko!

Gosh, so cute!

K-Kazuki?

Why?

I just passed by.

I'm always watching you closely, Ikkou.

What a cute baby, but why is it here?

Oh, is it yours, Chitose?

It's not!

He was left in front of the temple.

So we decided to take care of him for a while...

A little... A little child like him was abandoned...

K-Kazuki?

Oh, I'm sorry. But I...

Kazuki...

Fake tears.

He's totally deceived.

Ikkou is the type with a weakness for girls' tears.

Watch out for your husband cheating, Chitose.

Yuko!

Elephant.

Seriously, I swear... They make so much unnecessary extra work...

I know you're enjoying it too.

T-That's not true.

Such lies.

I wonder if Miyako is doing well.

It's been a while since she helped us with Hinata...

...50 I asked Lady Jyotoku to give her my regards...

That's true.

Hey, why don't you go there?

I'm not too good with kids.

I don't hate them. But I guess I don't know how to react to them.

I don't know what they're thinking.

People don't usually know what you're thinking, either.

You're right.

Yeah.

One cushion for you!

If I show him that I like kids, then it'll make me look good.

It's operation "girls who are liked by kids are liked by guys."

Come on, kid, come to big sis!

Hi, I'm big sis Kazuki.

Don't make him cry! He finally calmed down!

I didn't do anything!

Come on, don't cry.

Up high, up high!

Kazuki!

Why? Why are you crying?

Elephant.

What's going on?

Sakura... What's going on?

He's crying again?

Huge Breasts

The boob girl showed up.

Did you do something to him?

I didn't do anything!

Kazuki just held him.

It's not my fault!

Maybe you should just put him down for now.

Oh, gosh...

That hand gesture...

What a perverted kid.

It seems like...

...he likes Haruka, huh?

He has an eye for the right women.

G-Give him to me one more time!

Kazuki made him cry again.

No good I guess...

He really likes you, Haruka.

More than her...

It's Haruka's breasts.

I'm kind of worried about his future.

I'm so jealous.

That boob girl...

It's going to be done soon, so wait a little more.

Here you go.

Your tushy is all clean.

She's so efficient.

Haruka... Haruka is working quickly.

She's actually pretty capable, huh?

Speaking of which, she was better when she first came here.

She became a space case as time went by though.

I've been strict with her since she was a young girl.

I've disciplined her in place of our parents...

...regarding daily life and the temple.

All because she was born with the spiritual powers of the heaven realm.

I wanted her to grow up to be a person worthy of the spiritual power.

And the backlash from that is coming out now.

Yes. She's started slacking ever since she moved away.

I guess it's hard for her to see me due to this.

It seems she hasn't told everyone at Saienji about me either.

But if that's her true self, then maybe what I was doing was wrong.

Maybe I was making her feel unnecessarily uncomfortable.

She knows your feelings.

Looks like he's enjoying it.

Yeah.

Practice makes perfect. Now you can have a kid anytime!

Yuko!

But...

His mother ended up not coming back.

Lady Jyotoku is coming back late tomorrow afternoon...

Okay, it's time to get out of the bath.

You're out of the bath.

What's wrong?

Here, like this.

Look, you're all done.

Your mom will definitely come tomorrow.

So relax and just go to bed.

I thought it was going to be easy to deceive a baby...

I was wrong.

What is it? When you hold a baby,

you gently...

Oh, it's Ikkou.

Gently...

No!

Change of plans.

Ikkou!

Huh? Kazuki, why...

Because I was worried about the baby...

He's in the living room...

No, my baby is in front of me!

Ikkou, you're my baby!

Ikkou, I'm your mommy!

I'm going to breast-feed you!

Ikkou, do you like your mommy's boobies?

lkkou, ba-boo.

B-B-B-Ba-boo!

Ba-boo?

What?

Ba-ba-ba-boo!

He's crying so much!

Why are you here?

Ikkou, what's in your mouth?

It's nothing.

Here it is!

This is crying at night!

We know that already!

What should we do?

W-Wait. Wait.

We need to calm him down somehow.

Boo!

Look, it's Kamen Ranger! Hyper 3 and Tasmania too!

Devilkin and Ikkou as a worm.

Sakura, anything?

I don't know!

You're the type that relies too much on manuals.

This is my chance to show the results of my research.

Hey, it's big sis Kazuki.

Why?

What time do you think it is?

Haruka!

You're late! Haruka!

Never mind that! It's night crying!

Haruka, hurry! It has to be you now!

Okay, I understand.

It's no use even with Haruka...

Are you serious...

It's already morning.

Please stop crying.

If you cry that much, your throat will give out.

Maybe it's no use unless it's the mom...

I'm sorry...

I'm sorry...

...Haruka.

Haruka?

Now's my chance!

Ikkou!

Ikkou...

He stopped crying.

How?

A close physical relationship is a very important thing.

A naked relationship is the best.

N-Naked, you say...

No one gets it when you're joking, so cut it out.

The mother's not coming...

Lady Jyotoku will be back soon.

Is she here?

Lady Jyotoku!

What should we do?

Hide him, hide him! What should we do?

What are you doing?

Tacchan!

Tacchan, please forgive your mother.

I see. That's why he got attached to Haruka...

Totally.

So what's going on?

Well...

I'm happy for you, little boy.

Guided by those engraved words Kizamareta moji ni michibikare

I start again from the place I struggled to reach Tadoritsuita basho kara mata hajimarunda

Come on, lonesome traveler Saa, lonesome traveler

Oh road sign, how many travelers... Doredake no tabibito wo

...have you seen off, I wonder? Miokutta no darou michishirube yo

My index finger rushes over parchment... Hi ni yaketa chizu wo toku

...as I try to figure out my faded map Hitosashi yubi ga saki wo isogu

I want to hear your voice Anata no koe ga kikitai

I hum a rhapsody alone Hitori kuchizusamu rhapsody

As I travel along this sunburnt road... Hateru koto nado nai you na

...that seems to have no end Yaketsuita michi no ue de

Guided by those engraved words Kizamareta moji ni michibikare

I start again from the place I struggled to reach Tadoritsuita basho kara mata hajimarunda

Ah...

For as many things as you've lost, Ushinatta mono to onaji dake no

An equal amount lies waiting to be found Atarashii deai ga matterunda

Come on, lonesome traveler Saa, lonesome traveler

Come on, lonesome traveler Saa, lonesome traveler

It's already the second half. Even though I had such a cool entrance...

I'm totally a failing character. What's with how I'm treated these days?

Hey, Kazuki, are you mad?

N-No way!

You're not looking too well.

W-Who's fault is that?

Did you just soliloquize?

You're imagining things.

Of course, right? Of course...

So saying that, the next episode is "Don't Meddle!!"

Next Episode: Don't Meddie!! So saying that, the next episode is "Don't Meddle!!"

Next Episode: Don't Meddie!!

Next Episode: Don't Meddie!! I'm going to meddle with you!

Next Episode: Don't Meddie!!