All language subtitles for Shifting.Gears.2025.S02E09.1080p.WEB.h264-EDITH_Track03

Hey, Dad. Guess what?

Life isn't always a blistering
wound of chaos and despair.

Look who's in
a cheery mood.

Some bookstore
must have closed

and turned into
a new dispensary, huh?

I went to an estate sale.

This lady had
the coolest stuff.

And after I eliminated
everything she could have
died in, on, or under,

I bought this.

Huh, actually looks like
a knockoff of a Frank Matranga,

a very famous
California potter.

- Hmm.
- But I'm sure the only Potter you know is Harry.

Business has been great,
so I thought I'd treat myself.

And I haven't bought any art
since I got that poster

of a cat reading the newspaper
on the toilet

that I hung above the toilet.

Ah. Hey, um...

you know where that would fit
is up in my guest room.

You mean my room?

-I thought you liked it.
-I do like it.

It just doesn't fit
the aesthetic here
I've got going on.

I've been doing work...

I'll put it like
a millennial.

I don't like the vibe, bro.

What about my vibe, dude?

God forbid I should have
one thing in this house.

Wow. Well, you got two things.

Georgia and that other one,
uh, Carlson...

Oh. Oh, God, um,
what is his name?

Hey, guys.

This is Carlos Joaquín de la
Mancha Kobe-Bryant Martinez.

But you can call him Charlie.

Aw, he's so cute and tiny.

It kinda makes me
want to have another--

No.

A dog!

Where? Hiding behind
that little white rat?

Lily's family needs
someone to dog-sit

while they're in San Diego.

For a funeral,
not for something fun.

Actually, we are going
to SeaWorld after the funeral.

And Legoland.
It-- It's not important.

I told them we could watch
Charlie, if that's okay?

-Of course.
-How about asking the homeowner?

Please, Grandpa? He's adorbs.

Who's gonna boost my TikTok
viewer retention?

You are!

Who's gonna stay in a kennel
all weekend?

You are!

Come on, Charlie.

He's here!

Charlie, let's get you
into hair and makeup
for our first video.

Why is he wearing a vest?
Is he parking cars now?

No, he's an emotional
support animal.

What emotions
does he support?

The only ones I feel are
shame and embarrassment.

Ignore him.

The only emotional
support animal he believes in

is slow-cooked pork.

Why are you being such a pain?
You like dogs.

I love dogs, but I like
full-size regular dogs,

Labradors, Rottweilers.

That thing looks like
Colonel Sanders mated
with a Labubu.

Is that all his stuff?

Yeah, these are
Charlie's treats,

which aren't
as good as they look.

Look, if they didn't
want me to eat 'em,

shouldn't have made 'em
look like little sausages.

Oh, and here's
his anti-anxiety meds.

-Ooh.
-Riley.

What?
I'm not stealing pills
from a dog.

The dosage is way too low.

Oh, and here's his food.

Lily has him on a strict,
meat-free diet.

The dog is a vegan?
And what else is in there?

Cashew lasagna
and a fear of effort?

Carter, put it down!

What? I want healthy bones
and a shiny coat. Sue me.

Yeah. This is gonna be
a badass Caddy.

You know what I want you to do,
is get your schematics together

and start listing
where you want to go with this.

You got it, boss.
I'll get it to you on Saturday.

-Alright. Cool.
-Got a little hair on you.

Oh. Damn.

I'm with that dog one day,
I got hair all over me.

Gimme. Give me that thing.

You know,
I used to date a woman
that was into that.

Man, she used to dress me up
like a Phillie Phanatic.

Man, that woman was crazy.

I should call her.

Can you help me
with my back there?

Can you grab that?

Oh. Alright.

I feel like I need consent

before I venture
into the badonk-a-donk.

Just keep rolling before
I kick you in the badonk-a-donk.

Get that junk
off that dirty trunk!

Easy!

You guys really need
an HR department.

We don't need
an HR department.

We like being mean
to each other around here.

Hey, babe. You forgot
your toothbrush last night.

I didn't forget it.

I thought maybe I could
keep it at your place

since I'm spending
so much time there.

You guys are getting serious.

I never even used
to let women know where I live.

My motto: Go find the freaky.
Don't let the freaky find you.

Well, we can't go to my place.

I've got three roommates,
and we're all dancers.

So there's always one girl
in the shower

and another wrapped
in a towel banging on the door.

Mm.

You know what?
Let me help you out.

How about you move in with Gabe
and I move in with them?

You moving in
does kinda make sense.

-Really?
-Yeah. You're there
like every night.

And, I mean, you already
moved in your toothbrush.

Are you asking me
to move in with you?

Stitch started it.

But, yeah. Why not?

Not the most romantic thing
I've ever heard, but sure.

Why not?

Wow, this is so exciting!

Woo-hoo!

Alright, I'm gonna go break
the news to my roommates.

-Alright.
-The naked ones?

Hey, I'll do it.

Stitch, it's a
fourth-floor walk-up.

I'll make it work.

You know, you got no nuts.
That's empty calories.

In his defense, he's like
an old sea captain

scratching a leg that
hasn't been there for years.

Hey, Pops.
Eve sent a picture
from her tour.

-Wanna see?
-No.

If your phone is
anything like your laptop,

I definitely don't want
to see what's on there.

Alright, but I'm here when
you're ready to heal, brochacho.

Must be hard
hearing about Eve

having all these
incredible adventures.

No, I'm having
my own adventure here.

Looking at Gabe's punch list
for that Cadillac,

and he keeps putting
a dancing girl emoji on here.

Hey, hey, hey, hey!

You just sent Gabe
an eggplant emoji.

Take the dog, okay?
I need the dog out of here.

Oh, really?

I can't have a vase.
I can't have a dog.

I can't shout out the answers
during Wheel of Fortune.

You already saw that episode.

It's the same thing
over and over.

It's your house, your rules.

Your guest room I have
to share with your globe

where you've blacked out
all the countries
that are communist.

Don't I get any say?

It was bad enough
when I was a teenager,

but now I'm a mom
and I run my own business--

And I'm a homeowner.

Why don't you get yourself
your own home?

-You know what? I will.
-Well, good luck with that.

I'm sick of not feeling welcome

in what I thought
was my own home.

What you thought was wrong.

Okay. That's it.

Consider this my notice.
We are moving out.

And for your information,

California's not
a communist country.

Just give it time.

Oh.

Gabe just sent me
a heart emoji.

You started sending these,
finish it off.

Hey, do you guys know
any apartments

that are cheap but nice?

'Cause the place I'm living in
is free but mean.

Well, you know,
my neighbor's almost 100.

I could startle him.

Tell him I'm dating
his granddaughter.

Why would you want
to move out?

You get to live
with Matt Parker.

You should have seen
what he texted me yesterday.

I need my own space.

But apartments are
so expensive. Ugh.

Completely unrelated,
these lattes are now $200.

And don't forget to tip.

It's not gonna work.
You know why?

Because I don't think
you're that cute.

You're just an odd-looking dog.
That's all there is to it.

Alright, alright, alright,
alright, alright, alright.

Okay, gosh. Come in here.

You know, the people
that really like you?

They're gone.

Maybe for the weekend,
probably gone forever.

Yeah, that's what Eve
did to me.

Gone forever.

Oh, boy.

Alright.
They're not gone forever.

Look, don't tell anybody
I did that.

Or else I'll make you watch
those Sarah McLachlan
commercials.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Pretty spooky, right?

Alright, a little cozy,
but cute.

What do you guys think?

Smells kinda weird.

And that's from the guy who's
single-handedly keeping

"Pull my finger" alive.

Nice, huh?

But it's a competitive market.
You need to act fast.

Look, she might fall for your
"manufactured scarcity" trick,

but we both know
the market is softening.

Uh...

Pardon my daughter.
She's getting her MBA

from the University
of Shark Tank.

Why don't you guys
go check out the bedrooms?

Remember, I need
the bigger bedroom

for my crypto mining farm.

Uh, sorry.
No home businesses.

It's not a business,
it's a lifestyle!

Ignore her.
We're not high rollers.

You didn't tell us we'd all have
to share a bathroom.

Yeah, it's not gonna
work for me.

I need my tub time.

Is that what
you're calling it?

I'll let you three discuss.

Mom, we don't want to live here.
We love living at Grandpa's.

Yeah, his house
is like a fancy hotel.

In every room,
there's a TV and a Bible

that he stole
from a fancy hotel.

But we're living
under his thumb.

Don't you hate
being bossed around
by an unforgiving tyrant?

I mean, Georgia's been around
most of my life, so...

When we lived in Vegas,
we almost never saw
Grandma and Grandpa.

Now Grandma's gone...

And the way Pops eats red meat,
clock's a-ticking.

Ugh.

Okay, fine.

But don't worry. Grandpa's
gonna be here a long time.

That's how evil works.

Alright, how about that?
Ooh. You like bacon, huh?

That's good fat.
Well, not according to Riley.

If she was here,
she'd say bad fat.

Bad fat, good fat.

I mean,
the country's divided enough,

now Fat's got to make a choice.

Yeah, you know what?

I actually kind of like you.

You know, gotta say that,
Chuck.

Just two dudes watching
a little college basketball.

What could be better, man?

We don't need women telling
us what to do today,

do we, you know?

I did like Eve though, a lot.

She's different.
Opposites attract sometimes.

It's like, uh,
bacon and lettuce.

I don't understand
why lettuce went to Korea

when bacon said, "I love you."
That seems like a weird thing.

I like her a lot, though.

Should I text her?

Yeah. Why would I text her?

She's the one that left, right?

Hey, Pops.

Hey, Grandpa.

Hey, where's your mom?

Oh, she dropped us off.
She's going to Meditate.

It's the name
of that new dispensary

that used to be a bookstore.

What are you doing?

Charlie's not allowed
to have bacon!

You know what? I think
that's really a Saint Bernard

trapped in a body that
didn't get enough protein.

Pops, Lily said he has
a severe allergy!

Probably why he threw up
so much today.

But I thought it was
the chorizo.

It's too spicy for a dog.

You gave him chorizo, too?

Quite a bit of it.

We gotta
take him to the vet.

Pops, I know I'm new to dating,

but if I kill Lily's dog,
I'm never getting to first base.

Trust me,
that dog has eaten

a lot worse things
than what I gave it.

That's more than that
dog weighs.

Okay, maybe we should
take the dog to the vet.

Riley, what are you doing here?

I had to get away
from my dad

before one of us murders
the other in their sleep.

Me. I'm the murderer.

Also, I brought
a housewarming gift
for you and Amelie.

Ah, thank you.

This is so thoughtful.

Where should I put it?
Um, how about here?

How's the apartment
hunting going?

Terrible.

Turns out it's tough to beat
"free at my dad's place."

Yeah, and if you did find
another place for free,

you'd probably have to call
that guy "Daddy" too.

What are you doing?

I'm just getting rid of
some of my stuff

to make room
for Amelie's stuff.

Because you can't make room
with a partner

without making room
for a partner.

-I listened to a podcast.
-Ooh.

Wow. Big step. Good for you.

Is it though?

I just, you know,

don't really want
to get rid of my stuff.

Having second
thoughts about living together.

Uh-oh.
Are you getting cold feet?

They're so cold,
I can't feel them.

It happens to everybody.
I got cold feet

right before I married that
stupid son of a bitch Jimmy.

But you and Amelie
are gonna be great!

They're getting colder!
They're ice!

Gabe, this could be
good for you.

It's therapeutic to do
a little spring cleaning.

Get rid of stuff
that doesn't bring you joy.

Good news, babe.
Oh. Hey, Riley.

I found some amazing
accent pillows.

Oh, great.

Maybe you could use them
to smother my joy!

What?

I've been talking to Riley.

Yeah, I realize I'm
making a big mistake.

I can't do this!

What did you say to him?

I didn't say anything.
I-- I love an accent pillow.

Especially if it's
an Australian accent.

Oh, crikey. That's not a pillow.

That's a pillow!

What's he in for?

He had a panic attack.

Maybe 'cause you're making him
wear a bow tie.

He kind of looks like a dancer
at a bachelorette strip party.

He's dressed for his birthday,
and now you've ruined it.

Hey, how was
house hunting today?

Uh, the places weren't great,

but at least they were
out of our price range.

We told Mom
we don't want to move.

I just don't think at this age

I'm meant to live
an uncomfortable life.

We love your place.
All the bathrooms have locks.

I got the idea
your mom was miserable.

Mostly 'cause she told me
I was making her miserable.

She doesn't mean it.

In Vegas, we were always moving
from place to place.

She hated it.

Remember that time we lived
at Circus Circus?

It was awful awful.

Well, no, it wasn't.

The Elvis impersonator
taught me long division.

"Divide by two, carry the
hunka hunka burnin' one."

I think Mom just wants a place
that she can call her own.

She never told me any of this.

- Oh, look.
- Charlie is fine.

You can take him home.

Thanks, Doc. You're helping
a young boy become a man.

How much do you charge
to neuter a kid?

Listen, uh, dog's okay, though?

-Hundred percent.
-Excellent.

Gave him a very thorough exam.
Top to bottom, inside and out.

Hmm.

What's going on?

Why is he having
second thoughts?

He's just freaking out about
getting rid of his stuff.

It happened to my grandmother.
Of course, she was a hoarder.

And I was throwing away
a 14-year-old can of peaches.

What is with him?

I don't understand why
he's hanging on to his junk.

Don't all men like
to hang on to their junk?

The thing is,
it's not actually junk to Gabe.

Did he ever tell you
about his childhood?

No. He never talks
about that stuff.

Well, it was pretty crappy.
Not a lot of great memories.

This stuff reminds him
of the good times.

Like, uh, this plastic cup.

My dad took Gabe and my brother
to this game

the night Gabe's dad left.

And then, uh, Gabe's dad
blew him off on his birthday,

so we surprised him
with a trip to Medieval Times.

And after, I told
the Green Knight

Gabe had stage-four eczema,
so he let him pet his horse.

I had no idea.

Now I feel bad that
I was pressuring Gabe

to get rid of his stuff.

Well, maybe you
should tell him that.

Hi.

I wasn't eavesdropping,
but, uh,

I accept your apology.

Just so you know,
you can talk to me
about anything.

Even your childhood.

I know, it's just--

it's hard for me to talk
about things that make me sad.

It's like when McDonald's
was serving breakfast all day,

and then they just stopped.

Yeah, with zero warning.

Continue.

It's gonna work out, babe.

We're gonna be so happy here.

Okay.

I should go.

Uh, with this.

And I think I'll treat myself

to the Director's Cut
of Encino Man.

Ah, what a life I lead.

Look at the tail on that thing.

You're watching
Turner & Hooch?

Yeah. That dog is
a good actor, right?

That Tom Hanks?
I don't know.

I know, I just said that.

By the way,
don't worry about the vase.

It's going back in my room.
Sorry. Your guest room.

How about just put it
on our credenza?

Wait, did you say "our"?

Well, as my buddy
Carlos Joaquín de la Mancha
Kobe-Bryant Martinez says,

"Mi casa es su casa."

Thanks, Dad.

There is a little
caveat, though.

Ay Dios mio.

Listen, let's have you
start paying me rent,

but we'll put that
into a savings account,

and pretty soon
you'll have a down payment.

Get your own house.

Hmm. Thanks, Dad.

Although, by then
this will be my home,

and your home will be,
well, a home.

Okay. But do we have a deal?

This is our house
with our rules. Deal?

Speaking of, I was thinking
we could get solar panels--

No, no, no.

This is a house.
It's not some hippie commune

in the People's Republic
of Portland.

Exactly.

Here you go.
First rent check.

Feels good
to be independent.

Oh, if you really want
to feel independent,

I could take you off
the family phone plan.

Oh. Easy, tiger.
That check hasn't cleared yet.

Why are you putting that there?

It looks better here.

I'm sorry.
What'd you say, Charlie?

Exactly. I agree.
He said it doesn't fit there.

What happened to
"our house, our rules"?

It's just too big for the space.

You gave birth to Carter,
you get it.

Oh.

Carter, your girlfriend's here!

Oh, we're not using
traditional labels.

We're going with
"boo" and "bae."

Boo-bae.

Oh, I missed you.

You saw that?

Thanks for taking care
of Charlie.

Oh, of course. We'll miss him.

Don't you want to say
goodbye, Dad?

Sure. One more belly rub.

Come here, boy, come over here.

You really are
man's best friend.