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00:00:03,488 --> 00:00:06,088
Cheers is filmedbefore a live studio audience.
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00:00:09,688 --> 00:00:11,888
Boy, look at her.
3
00:00:11,888 --> 00:00:12,888
What a glow she has.
4
00:00:12,888 --> 00:00:14,288
You know, strange
as it sounds,
5
00:00:14,388 --> 00:00:15,488
there are
actually times
6
00:00:15,488 --> 00:00:16,688
when I resent
being a man.
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00:00:16,688 --> 00:00:17,988
Ah, that's all right, Fras.
8
00:00:17,988 --> 00:00:19,588
Sometimes we resent
you being one.
9
00:00:22,588 --> 00:00:24,588
I was referring to
Carla's condition.
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00:00:24,588 --> 00:00:25,788
You see, she's able
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00:00:25,788 --> 00:00:28,088
to do something
we men never shall--
12
00:00:28,088 --> 00:00:29,888
experience the miracle
of creating a new life.
13
00:00:29,988 --> 00:00:31,388
You know, I'll
have to admit.
14
00:00:31,388 --> 00:00:32,988
I've often wondered
what it would like
15
00:00:32,988 --> 00:00:35,388
to have another human being
moving around inside you.
16
00:00:35,488 --> 00:00:37,488
Must be spooky,
but real neato.
17
00:00:37,488 --> 00:00:38,888
Yeah.
18
00:00:38,988 --> 00:00:41,088
There's probably nothing
so awesome
19
00:00:41,188 --> 00:00:42,688
in the entire universe.
20
00:00:42,788 --> 00:00:44,088
Yes, gentlemen,
I'm afraid
21
00:00:44,088 --> 00:00:45,288
that we've
been relegated
22
00:00:45,388 --> 00:00:46,788
to the position
of observer.
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00:00:46,788 --> 00:00:49,288
Passive, sitting
on the sidelines.
24
00:00:49,388 --> 00:00:51,988
Doomed by nature
to a life of envy.
25
00:00:51,988 --> 00:00:54,288
God, feels like
there's a dump truck
26
00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:56,388
parked on my bladder.
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00:00:57,588 --> 00:00:59,088
Well, then again,
28
00:00:59,088 --> 00:01:01,788
nature is wise
in her way.
29
00:01:06,988 --> 00:01:09,588
¶ Making your way
in the world today ¶
30
00:01:09,588 --> 00:01:12,588
¶ Takes everything you've got
31
00:01:12,588 --> 00:01:15,388
¶ Taking a break
from all your worries ¶
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00:01:15,488 --> 00:01:18,488
¶ Sure would help a lot
33
00:01:18,588 --> 00:01:24,088
¶ Wouldn't you like
to get away? ¶
34
00:01:24,088 --> 00:01:26,888
¶ Sometimes you want to go
35
00:01:26,988 --> 00:01:31,588
¶ Where everybody
knows your name ¶
36
00:01:31,588 --> 00:01:36,788
¶ And they're always glad
you came ¶
37
00:01:36,788 --> 00:01:38,788
¶ You want to be
where you can see ¶
38
00:01:38,788 --> 00:01:41,788
¶ Our troubles
are all the same ¶
39
00:01:41,788 --> 00:01:46,588
¶ You want to be where everybody
knows your name ¶
40
00:01:46,588 --> 00:01:49,688
¶ You want to go
where people know ¶
41
00:01:49,688 --> 00:01:51,788
¶ People are all the same
42
00:01:51,888 --> 00:01:56,388
¶ You want to go where
everybody knows your name. ¶
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00:02:17,156 --> 00:02:19,156
What makes me think
this belongs to you?
44
00:02:20,356 --> 00:02:22,756
My jasmine scented
oriental massage oil.
45
00:02:22,856 --> 00:02:26,056
Oh, God.
46
00:02:26,156 --> 00:02:28,456
God, I thought
I'd lost this.
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00:02:28,456 --> 00:02:30,156
I found it wedged
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00:02:30,256 --> 00:02:32,456
underneath the couch cushions
in my office.
49
00:02:32,456 --> 00:02:35,156
Ah.
I don't think I want to
know how it got there.
50
00:02:35,156 --> 00:02:37,056
I'm kind
of curious.
51
00:02:38,856 --> 00:02:40,056
Tell you what.
52
00:02:40,056 --> 00:02:42,256
Why don't you, uh, put that back
where you found it,
53
00:02:42,256 --> 00:02:44,956
and that way, we'll know
where it is when we need it.
54
00:02:45,056 --> 00:02:47,256
When hell freezes over.
55
00:02:47,256 --> 00:02:49,256
Well, that's perfect,
'cause this stuff heats up
56
00:02:49,256 --> 00:02:51,156
when you rub it in.
57
00:02:53,056 --> 00:02:55,356
Now, what... what's wrong
with her, you know?
58
00:02:55,456 --> 00:02:58,656
Maybe one of the chains
in her underwear is twisted.
59
00:03:02,056 --> 00:03:03,256
Afternoon, everybody.
60
00:03:03,256 --> 00:03:04,456
Norm!
61
00:03:04,556 --> 00:03:05,956
Hey.
62
00:03:06,056 --> 00:03:07,156
What's going on,
Mr. Peterson?
63
00:03:07,256 --> 00:03:09,956
Let's talk about
what's going in Mr. Peterson.
64
00:03:09,956 --> 00:03:11,456
Beer, Woody.
65
00:03:11,556 --> 00:03:13,056
How's the job-hunting going?
66
00:03:13,056 --> 00:03:14,456
Oh, lots better, Sam.
67
00:03:14,456 --> 00:03:16,956
Today I actually got turned down
for an executive position.
68
00:03:19,956 --> 00:03:21,856
It's a good way
to lose that.
69
00:03:23,256 --> 00:03:24,756
I'm sorry, Mr. Peterson.
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00:03:24,856 --> 00:03:26,256
You've been cut off.
71
00:03:29,656 --> 00:03:33,656
Oh. Okay, where's the camera?
72
00:03:33,656 --> 00:03:34,756
This is no joke.
73
00:03:34,856 --> 00:03:36,056
According to my books,
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00:03:36,056 --> 00:03:38,156
you are way over
your credit limit.
75
00:03:38,156 --> 00:03:38,956
Well, what's the big deal?
76
00:03:39,056 --> 00:03:41,356
What's he over--
ten, 20 bucks?
77
00:03:41,356 --> 00:03:42,856
837.
78
00:03:43,956 --> 00:03:46,656
But in other words,
under $900, huh?
79
00:03:47,356 --> 00:03:49,756
You can't cut off
one of our regulars.
80
00:03:49,756 --> 00:03:51,256
The poor guy
is unemployed.
81
00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:53,156
Look, Miss Howe, uh,
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00:03:53,156 --> 00:03:55,056
Norm here is
in a very delicate spot.
83
00:03:55,056 --> 00:03:57,056
His self-confidence
has been shattered.
84
00:03:57,056 --> 00:03:59,656
Uh, what he needs from us now
is help and support.
85
00:03:59,656 --> 00:04:02,456
Isn't there some other way
to resolve this problem?
86
00:04:02,456 --> 00:04:03,856
Well, you could pay
his bar bill.
87
00:04:03,856 --> 00:04:06,256
Norm, the woman
will not listen to reason.
88
00:04:07,456 --> 00:04:09,256
Maybe he could
work it off, huh?
89
00:04:10,256 --> 00:04:11,456
No, I'm serious. Whoa,
90
00:04:11,456 --> 00:04:12,956
whoa, whoa, hey.
91
00:04:13,056 --> 00:04:14,156
Listen, maybe there's
92
00:04:14,156 --> 00:04:15,656
some accounting he
could do for the bar.
93
00:04:15,656 --> 00:04:17,756
Our corporation's books
are handled
94
00:04:17,756 --> 00:04:19,756
by Franklin, Sussman
and Gurwitz.
95
00:04:19,756 --> 00:04:21,156
Ooh, they're
very good, Sam.
96
00:04:21,156 --> 00:04:22,956
They canned me a
couple years ago.
97
00:04:24,656 --> 00:04:25,856
Please.
98
00:04:27,156 --> 00:04:29,256
Are you good
at anything?
99
00:04:29,256 --> 00:04:30,356
Yeah,
100
00:04:30,456 --> 00:04:31,656
but you cut him off.
101
00:04:31,656 --> 00:04:32,756
No, no.
102
00:04:32,856 --> 00:04:34,556
Come on, don't you have
any other skills?
103
00:04:34,556 --> 00:04:35,656
I can barbecue.
104
00:04:35,756 --> 00:04:37,056
Oh, hey, hey.
Yeah.
105
00:04:37,156 --> 00:04:39,256
All right,
well, I,
106
00:04:39,256 --> 00:04:41,256
uh... I did a little
house painting in college.
107
00:04:41,256 --> 00:04:42,556
You know, to make ends meet.
108
00:04:42,556 --> 00:04:43,656
Norm, Norm, Norm.
109
00:04:43,756 --> 00:04:45,456
Norm, I think
they're talking about a job
110
00:04:45,456 --> 00:04:46,956
where you get, uh,
paid with money,
111
00:04:46,956 --> 00:04:50,356
not with little grain pellets
dropped out of a chute.
112
00:04:50,356 --> 00:04:52,756
Cliff, you, uh, you got
something against painters?
113
00:04:52,856 --> 00:04:54,056
No, no, no. I...
114
00:04:54,056 --> 00:04:55,656
I'm in favor
of hiring the blithering.
115
00:04:57,556 --> 00:04:59,856
Do... do you need
any painting done around here?
116
00:05:01,056 --> 00:05:02,756
I guess you could
repaint the office.
117
00:05:02,856 --> 00:05:04,456
Are you willing?
118
00:05:04,556 --> 00:05:05,956
It's been an awfully long time.
119
00:05:05,956 --> 00:05:07,056
Oh, yeah, yeah.
120
00:05:07,156 --> 00:05:08,256
It's gonna take you
121
00:05:08,256 --> 00:05:09,856
at least, what,
seven or eight seconds
122
00:05:09,856 --> 00:05:10,856
to relearn that skill.
123
00:05:11,856 --> 00:05:13,356
'Cause, you know, Cliff,
I'm beginning
124
00:05:13,356 --> 00:05:14,856
to pick up
a little thread here. Uh...
125
00:05:14,956 --> 00:05:15,956
Ah.
126
00:05:16,056 --> 00:05:17,156
Would you mind explaining
127
00:05:17,156 --> 00:05:19,256
this little obsession
you have about painters?
128
00:05:19,356 --> 00:05:21,056
- Well, all right.
- Uh, well,
129
00:05:21,056 --> 00:05:21,756
it's manual labor.
130
00:05:21,756 --> 00:05:23,056
I mean,
it's beneath you, Norm.
131
00:05:23,056 --> 00:05:25,056
Well, if you take a job
like this, we're gonna be
132
00:05:25,156 --> 00:05:26,856
on entirely different
social strata.
133
00:05:26,956 --> 00:05:29,156
We'll have nothing
to talk about, all right?
134
00:05:29,156 --> 00:05:31,256
Semigloss or enamel?
135
00:05:37,856 --> 00:05:39,956
Hey, Woody, would you close up
for me tonight?
136
00:05:40,056 --> 00:05:41,456
I got to get home.
137
00:05:41,556 --> 00:05:42,856
No problem, Carla.
138
00:05:42,856 --> 00:05:44,256
By the way,
139
00:05:44,356 --> 00:05:45,556
I really am envious of you
140
00:05:45,556 --> 00:05:47,456
having a nice big family
to go home to.
141
00:05:47,556 --> 00:05:49,256
Oh, yeah, it's great, all right.
142
00:05:49,356 --> 00:05:51,556
I got 11 people
143
00:05:51,556 --> 00:05:53,856
living under a roof
that was meant for only six.
144
00:05:53,856 --> 00:05:57,356
Gino's dog just had puppies
on my side of the bed.
145
00:05:57,456 --> 00:05:59,956
My daughter-in-law
is driving me nuts, and somehow,
146
00:06:00,056 --> 00:06:02,556
my mother-in-law got a hold
of our address.
147
00:06:04,556 --> 00:06:06,556
Puppies.
You lucky duck.
148
00:06:15,656 --> 00:06:17,256
You seem to be
enjoying yourself.
149
00:06:17,356 --> 00:06:19,256
Oh, sorry. Uh...
150
00:06:19,356 --> 00:06:20,356
No, that's all right.
151
00:06:23,156 --> 00:06:26,056
Oh, uh, you got a phone call
here, uh...
152
00:06:26,156 --> 00:06:27,656
Eva Ake?
153
00:06:28,856 --> 00:06:29,756
I could swear
it was a man.
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00:06:29,756 --> 00:06:30,956
Oh, well,
there's paint here.
155
00:06:31,056 --> 00:06:32,556
Evan Drake. Uh...
156
00:06:32,656 --> 00:06:34,056
That's my boss.
Yeah.
157
00:06:34,156 --> 00:06:34,956
What did he say?
158
00:06:35,056 --> 00:06:36,356
Well, he said, he, uh...
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00:06:36,356 --> 00:06:38,256
he wants you
to tear up my bar bill.
160
00:06:39,256 --> 00:06:41,456
I... Well...
161
00:06:41,456 --> 00:06:43,056
I didn't think
I'd get away with that.
162
00:06:43,056 --> 00:06:45,056
Uh, but, no, he said
he's on his way over here.
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00:06:45,156 --> 00:06:46,656
Sometime, like, uh...
164
00:06:46,756 --> 00:06:48,256
around nowish.
165
00:06:48,256 --> 00:06:49,656
Now?!
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00:06:49,656 --> 00:06:51,556
God.
167
00:07:03,356 --> 00:07:07,056
Shall I, uh, comb my hair, too,
or will I be leaving?
168
00:07:08,456 --> 00:07:10,756
This is just a business meeting.
169
00:07:15,256 --> 00:07:16,456
Rebecca Howe.
170
00:07:16,456 --> 00:07:17,756
Oh, hello, Mr. Drake.
171
00:07:17,756 --> 00:07:19,056
I thought you were--
172
00:07:19,156 --> 00:07:20,556
Norm.
173
00:07:21,156 --> 00:07:22,256
No, no, no, I know
174
00:07:22,256 --> 00:07:23,956
you're not Norm.
You're Evan.
175
00:07:23,956 --> 00:07:25,256
What I meant
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00:07:25,256 --> 00:07:26,856
to say was--
Get out of here.
177
00:07:26,856 --> 00:07:28,056
No, no, no, not you.
178
00:07:28,056 --> 00:07:29,856
You stay right
where you are.
179
00:07:29,956 --> 00:07:31,056
No, I swear...
180
00:07:31,156 --> 00:07:32,056
Get out!
181
00:07:32,156 --> 00:07:34,656
Oh. Hello?
182
00:07:34,656 --> 00:07:37,456
Well, that was
fast, Mr. P.
183
00:07:37,556 --> 00:07:39,956
Yeah, she got a phone call
from Mr. Drake.
184
00:07:39,956 --> 00:07:42,156
Hey, Mr. Peterson,
I really feel bad
185
00:07:42,156 --> 00:07:43,656
about you being cut off.
186
00:07:43,656 --> 00:07:45,256
Yeah.
187
00:07:45,256 --> 00:07:47,556
You know, I remember
the good old days
188
00:07:47,556 --> 00:07:49,656
when you used
to come in here and
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00:07:49,656 --> 00:07:51,256
say something funny.
190
00:07:51,356 --> 00:07:52,956
I'd pour you a beer.
191
00:07:53,056 --> 00:07:54,556
You'd drink it,
I'd pour you another one,
192
00:07:54,556 --> 00:07:55,756
you'd drink that, too.
193
00:07:55,856 --> 00:07:56,956
Yeah.
194
00:07:56,956 --> 00:07:58,856
Yeah, I remember, Woody.
195
00:08:00,156 --> 00:08:01,656
So look at that--
hardly even touched.
196
00:08:01,656 --> 00:08:02,956
Yeah.
197
00:08:03,056 --> 00:08:05,456
I'll tell you, I don't
normally drink beer, but, uh,
198
00:08:05,556 --> 00:08:08,456
I just cleaned the taps,
and I wanted to make sure
199
00:08:08,456 --> 00:08:11,156
that everything was all right,
so I had one.
200
00:08:11,156 --> 00:08:13,856
It was like a mountain stream,
201
00:08:13,856 --> 00:08:15,956
only colder, fresher.
202
00:08:15,956 --> 00:08:17,956
You know, sometimes
203
00:08:17,956 --> 00:08:19,856
there's nothing
like a nice cold beer
204
00:08:19,856 --> 00:08:21,056
to really hit the spot.
205
00:08:21,156 --> 00:08:23,356
Yeah, I think I read
that somewhere, Woody.
206
00:08:37,056 --> 00:08:38,656
You know,
I-I really like this color.
207
00:08:38,656 --> 00:08:39,856
I think it's gonna really
208
00:08:39,856 --> 00:08:41,456
spruce up the office
quite a bit.
209
00:08:43,256 --> 00:08:44,956
Again, it's just
an opinion. Uh...
210
00:08:46,956 --> 00:08:49,356
Is there something wrong?
211
00:08:54,856 --> 00:08:58,556
Right. Well, yes,
I understand, of course.
212
00:08:58,556 --> 00:09:00,056
Here, here, have a seat,
have a seat.
213
00:09:00,056 --> 00:09:01,356
Just relax.
214
00:09:01,456 --> 00:09:03,056
Oh, God.
215
00:09:03,156 --> 00:09:05,056
Here.
216
00:09:05,056 --> 00:09:07,756
Some authority figure.
217
00:09:07,756 --> 00:09:09,356
I'm sorry.
218
00:09:09,356 --> 00:09:12,056
It's probably
just job stress.
219
00:09:12,056 --> 00:09:13,456
Oh, you shouldn't
be having job stress.
220
00:09:13,456 --> 00:09:14,856
You're doing a great job here.
221
00:09:14,856 --> 00:09:16,156
Oh, tell that to Mr. Drake.
222
00:09:16,156 --> 00:09:18,556
He said I should consider
the last fiscal report
223
00:09:18,656 --> 00:09:20,956
a personal embarrassment.
224
00:09:22,156 --> 00:09:23,856
Norm, I need your help.
225
00:09:23,856 --> 00:09:24,856
Uh, you just started.
226
00:09:24,956 --> 00:09:26,156
You're-you're gonna do fine.
227
00:09:26,256 --> 00:09:28,156
Things are gonna turn around,
I swear.
228
00:09:28,256 --> 00:09:29,256
Uh...
229
00:09:29,256 --> 00:09:30,356
No, you idiot.
230
00:09:30,456 --> 00:09:32,056
My hair's stuck to the wall.
231
00:09:45,860 --> 00:09:47,260
Oh, great.
232
00:09:47,260 --> 00:09:48,360
No, no, it's
really...
233
00:09:48,460 --> 00:09:49,660
It's not, uh...
not that bad.
234
00:09:49,660 --> 00:09:51,560
I paid big bucks
to have Vera's
hair frosted.
235
00:09:51,560 --> 00:09:53,260
Didn't turn out
half as good.
236
00:09:54,960 --> 00:09:57,260
Well, maybe
I better take off.
237
00:09:57,360 --> 00:09:58,960
When people are upset,
they...
238
00:09:58,960 --> 00:10:00,160
they like to be alone.
239
00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:02,060
Nonsense. I'm fine.
240
00:10:02,060 --> 00:10:03,060
Talking about me.
241
00:10:03,160 --> 00:10:04,760
I'm feeling a little queasy.
242
00:10:04,860 --> 00:10:06,560
Oh, please stay.
243
00:10:07,660 --> 00:10:08,960
I mean,
244
00:10:09,060 --> 00:10:11,460
this office is a real
inconvenience like this.
245
00:10:14,460 --> 00:10:16,260
All right.
246
00:10:21,660 --> 00:10:22,960
Would you, uh,
247
00:10:22,960 --> 00:10:25,160
would you like to talk
about what just happened?
248
00:10:25,260 --> 00:10:25,660
No.
249
00:10:25,660 --> 00:10:27,060
Phew.
250
00:10:36,160 --> 00:10:37,660
You really do seem to be
251
00:10:37,760 --> 00:10:39,360
enjoying this job.
252
00:10:39,360 --> 00:10:41,160
Yeah. Yeah, I actually do,
you know?
253
00:10:41,260 --> 00:10:42,660
I think painting is just
254
00:10:42,660 --> 00:10:44,860
so vastly different
from accounting.
255
00:10:46,060 --> 00:10:47,760
This is real, you know?
256
00:10:47,760 --> 00:10:50,160
This I have some control over.
257
00:10:50,260 --> 00:10:51,660
I mean, when I look back,
258
00:10:51,660 --> 00:10:54,160
I finish a job,
I can say,
259
00:10:54,160 --> 00:10:56,960
"You know, I did that."
260
00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:03,060
Door must have moved.
261
00:11:03,760 --> 00:11:05,660
You know,
262
00:11:05,760 --> 00:11:09,060
I think that this color
is the exact same color
263
00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:11,560
as Mary Lou Sebold's car coat.
264
00:11:11,560 --> 00:11:12,160
Who?
265
00:11:12,260 --> 00:11:13,560
This girl
I had an insane crush on
266
00:11:13,560 --> 00:11:14,760
in the third grade.
267
00:11:14,760 --> 00:11:16,660
Except she had no idea
that I was alive.
268
00:11:16,660 --> 00:11:18,160
I used to leave
269
00:11:18,160 --> 00:11:19,260
little notes for her.
270
00:11:19,260 --> 00:11:20,860
"I love you."
271
00:11:20,960 --> 00:11:23,260
And one day,
I finally got up the nerve
272
00:11:23,260 --> 00:11:24,560
to sign one, N.P.
273
00:11:24,560 --> 00:11:26,860
The next week,
she was going steady
274
00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:29,560
with my best friend,
Nicky Petropolis.
275
00:11:30,960 --> 00:11:32,460
What'd you do?
276
00:11:32,460 --> 00:11:34,360
The only thing
I could do, really.
277
00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:35,660
I went over to Nicky,
278
00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:37,760
and I calmly explained
the situation.
279
00:11:37,760 --> 00:11:39,160
Then I sat on him.
280
00:11:43,860 --> 00:11:45,360
Oh, God.
281
00:11:45,360 --> 00:11:47,360
I think that's the first time
I've really laughed
282
00:11:47,460 --> 00:11:48,560
since I took over here.
283
00:11:48,560 --> 00:11:50,460
Oh, it is, trust me.
284
00:11:54,660 --> 00:11:56,960
Why'd you tell me that story?
285
00:11:56,960 --> 00:11:58,360
Well, I don't know.
286
00:11:58,360 --> 00:11:59,760
It's kind of late.
287
00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:01,060
We're alone.
288
00:12:01,060 --> 00:12:03,160
I'm a man, you're a woman.
289
00:12:04,460 --> 00:12:05,760
Maybe it's the paint talking.
290
00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:11,060
Norm?
291
00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:12,360
Yeah.
292
00:12:12,460 --> 00:12:14,660
Do you find me cold?
293
00:12:14,660 --> 00:12:15,960
You?
294
00:12:16,060 --> 00:12:17,360
Cold? No.
295
00:12:17,360 --> 00:12:18,660
No, I wouldn't say cold.
296
00:12:18,760 --> 00:12:19,860
Coolish.
297
00:12:20,960 --> 00:12:22,260
In the brisk area,
298
00:12:22,360 --> 00:12:23,560
but, uh...
299
00:12:23,660 --> 00:12:25,260
Why? Who, uh...
who says you're cold?
300
00:12:25,360 --> 00:12:26,660
Everyone.
301
00:12:26,660 --> 00:12:27,860
Oh. Well...
302
00:12:27,960 --> 00:12:29,560
I don't think you're cold.
303
00:12:29,560 --> 00:12:30,760
Really?
304
00:12:30,760 --> 00:12:32,260
Yeah. I always meant
to tell you that,
305
00:12:32,260 --> 00:12:34,360
but I didn't feel
as though I could approach you.
306
00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:42,560
Thank you, Norm.
307
00:12:42,560 --> 00:12:43,960
Oh.
308
00:12:44,060 --> 00:12:45,860
Thank you.
309
00:12:45,860 --> 00:12:47,560
Uh, well, I'd better
get out of here.
310
00:12:47,660 --> 00:12:49,360
Um, would you mind
locking up for me?
311
00:12:49,460 --> 00:12:50,860
No, no, I don't mind at all.
312
00:12:50,960 --> 00:12:52,660
Listen, would you
please not, uh,
313
00:12:52,660 --> 00:12:54,760
mention that I like
painting to the guys?
314
00:12:54,860 --> 00:12:57,460
Cliff already thinks
I'm a weenie.
315
00:12:57,560 --> 00:12:59,060
Well, from what I've seen,
316
00:12:59,060 --> 00:13:00,260
he's an authority.
317
00:13:00,260 --> 00:13:01,660
Yeah.
318
00:13:01,660 --> 00:13:03,160
Well...
319
00:13:03,160 --> 00:13:05,360
And, really, thanks
for letting me paint an office
320
00:13:05,360 --> 00:13:06,860
that clearly didn't need it.
321
00:13:06,860 --> 00:13:07,860
No problem.
322
00:13:07,860 --> 00:13:09,960
You're a nice man, Norm.
323
00:13:10,060 --> 00:13:11,960
You're kind of nice yourself.
324
00:13:11,960 --> 00:13:14,060
I guess we like each other.
325
00:13:14,160 --> 00:13:15,360
Guess so.
326
00:13:15,460 --> 00:13:16,460
Great.
327
00:13:16,460 --> 00:13:19,160
This will just be
our little secret.
328
00:13:19,160 --> 00:13:19,760
Oh, yeah.
329
00:13:28,060 --> 00:13:29,560
I am a little worried about
330
00:13:29,560 --> 00:13:31,660
the direction this
bar is taking.
331
00:13:31,760 --> 00:13:32,660
How so?
332
00:13:32,660 --> 00:13:34,660
Well, it just
doesn't seem right
333
00:13:34,760 --> 00:13:36,860
when the stakes
for a game of pool
334
00:13:36,960 --> 00:13:38,960
is a round of
wine spritzers.
335
00:13:39,060 --> 00:13:40,760
Not even the pool room is safe
336
00:13:40,860 --> 00:13:43,660
from the encroaching
hordes of yuppiedom.
337
00:13:44,860 --> 00:13:47,460
How long will it be
until we're all suffocated
338
00:13:47,460 --> 00:13:49,760
beneath an avalanche
of alligator shirts,
339
00:13:49,760 --> 00:13:51,860
German cars, and racquetball
club memberships?
340
00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:53,160
Oh, oh, by the way, Sam,
341
00:13:53,160 --> 00:13:55,960
uh, may I have another
Perrier with lime?
342
00:13:58,860 --> 00:14:00,660
Have a cup of coffee
or something, Sam?
343
00:14:00,660 --> 00:14:02,460
Make it a beer.
On the house.
344
00:14:08,960 --> 00:14:10,660
I say we check the office
345
00:14:10,660 --> 00:14:13,160
for pods from outer space.
346
00:14:14,960 --> 00:14:16,960
I wonder what
that's all about, huh?
347
00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:18,560
Look, did it ever
occur to any of you
348
00:14:18,660 --> 00:14:19,860
that she just might
be a nice woman?
349
00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:21,060
Oh, yeah, right.
350
00:14:21,060 --> 00:14:22,760
And so am I.
351
00:14:27,460 --> 00:14:29,160
So, how come you guys
are so chummy, huh?
352
00:14:29,260 --> 00:14:30,760
Sorry, Sam. Can't talk about it.
353
00:14:30,760 --> 00:14:32,160
Kind of private.
354
00:14:32,160 --> 00:14:33,260
Oh, give me a break.
355
00:14:33,260 --> 00:14:34,960
Guys are supposed
to talk about girls
356
00:14:35,060 --> 00:14:36,360
behind their backs.
357
00:14:36,360 --> 00:14:38,160
Didn't I tell you
358
00:14:38,160 --> 00:14:39,760
everything about me and Diane?
359
00:14:40,460 --> 00:14:43,560
Well, now's your chance
to thank me.
360
00:14:43,660 --> 00:14:46,160
I'm not really at liberty
to go into details.
361
00:14:46,260 --> 00:14:47,560
Suffice it to say,
362
00:14:47,560 --> 00:14:50,460
Miss Howe had a little
personal crisis
363
00:14:50,460 --> 00:14:51,760
last night, okay?
364
00:14:51,860 --> 00:14:53,760
Few tears were shed.
365
00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:55,460
Real tears?
366
00:14:55,460 --> 00:14:58,160
You sure she didn't just
pull a hair out of her nose?
367
00:14:59,960 --> 00:15:01,660
No, Carla.
368
00:15:01,760 --> 00:15:02,560
She got a little sad,
369
00:15:02,660 --> 00:15:04,160
and I happened to be there
to comfort her.
370
00:15:04,260 --> 00:15:05,960
I think it really
just takes
371
00:15:06,060 --> 00:15:07,960
a little warmth
and compassion,
372
00:15:08,060 --> 00:15:09,960
and she warms
right up to you.
373
00:15:09,960 --> 00:15:12,360
Compassion, huh?
374
00:15:12,360 --> 00:15:13,860
Mr. Malone.
Mm-hmm.
375
00:15:13,860 --> 00:15:16,460
Do you realize we're
running low on seltzer?
376
00:15:16,460 --> 00:15:17,560
I'm so sorry.
377
00:15:17,660 --> 00:15:20,360
Ho-How can these things happen?
378
00:15:21,360 --> 00:15:22,960
Is there anything I can do?
379
00:15:22,960 --> 00:15:24,460
Yes, let me
know next time.
380
00:15:24,460 --> 00:15:25,660
Well, of course I will.
381
00:15:25,760 --> 00:15:27,460
I just hope that's enough.
382
00:15:28,860 --> 00:15:30,360
Are you feeling
all right?
383
00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:32,460
Yes, thank you very much.
384
00:15:32,560 --> 00:15:35,260
That's very sweet
of you to ask.
385
00:15:35,360 --> 00:15:36,860
Norm, I gave you
my address, didn't I?
386
00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:38,260
Yep. See you tomorrow.
See you.
387
00:15:38,360 --> 00:15:39,760
Whoa, what was that all about?
388
00:15:39,760 --> 00:15:41,460
Just a little bit
of painting at her apartment.
389
00:15:41,460 --> 00:15:42,560
Listen, uh,
390
00:15:42,560 --> 00:15:44,160
you know, I can
really sympathize
391
00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:45,760
with your situation
of painting.
392
00:15:45,760 --> 00:15:47,760
Uh, you know, if the fumes
and everything bothers you,
393
00:15:47,860 --> 00:15:49,460
you can always
spend the night at my place.
394
00:15:49,460 --> 00:15:51,560
I don't think so.
395
00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:53,660
That's it.
396
00:15:53,660 --> 00:15:55,160
I say she's a guy.
397
00:15:56,360 --> 00:15:58,360
Good night, Sammy.
398
00:15:58,360 --> 00:16:00,460
Say, uh... Norm,
wait a second here.
399
00:16:00,460 --> 00:16:02,760
You know... you know,
I like to paint.
400
00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:04,960
Why don't I help
you, man, you know.
401
00:16:04,960 --> 00:16:06,460
Come on.
402
00:16:06,460 --> 00:16:07,860
No. I know you.
403
00:16:07,860 --> 00:16:10,160
You just want to
log a little sack
time with her.
404
00:16:10,160 --> 00:16:12,160
Come on, no. The
truth is, I just...
405
00:16:12,160 --> 00:16:13,260
I got to find out
406
00:16:13,360 --> 00:16:15,560
if there's a real human
being in there, man.
407
00:16:15,560 --> 00:16:17,560
I-I can't keep working
for a cold fish.
408
00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:18,660
Please, come on.
409
00:16:18,760 --> 00:16:19,960
All right.
410
00:16:19,960 --> 00:16:22,360
But no funny stuff.
411
00:16:22,360 --> 00:16:23,360
No, I swear to God.
412
00:16:23,560 --> 00:16:24,960
I won't touch her.
I won't touch her.
413
00:16:24,960 --> 00:16:26,460
I make no guarantees
about you.
414
00:16:26,560 --> 00:16:29,160
You've been driving me crazy
in this little white outfit.
415
00:16:29,160 --> 00:16:31,660
Yeah? You should
see me in my caftan.
416
00:16:46,560 --> 00:16:47,860
Oh, hi, Norm.
Come on in.
417
00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:48,960
Thank you.
418
00:16:49,060 --> 00:16:50,660
I was just...
Hi.
419
00:16:53,460 --> 00:16:54,360
Oh, God.
420
00:16:54,360 --> 00:16:57,060
Now it knows where I live.
421
00:16:57,160 --> 00:16:58,960
Sorry, I, uh, needed a helper,
422
00:16:58,960 --> 00:17:00,760
and when I checked around,
423
00:17:00,760 --> 00:17:03,760
most of the fellas
expected to be paid.
424
00:17:03,860 --> 00:17:05,960
And you're doing
this for nothing?
425
00:17:06,060 --> 00:17:08,260
Well, it's an act
of compassion.
426
00:17:08,260 --> 00:17:10,460
I'm doing this
out of the...
427
00:17:10,460 --> 00:17:12,260
goodness of my heart.
428
00:17:12,260 --> 00:17:13,460
Norm.
Yeah.
429
00:17:13,460 --> 00:17:15,560
I'd like all
the wood here
430
00:17:15,660 --> 00:17:18,160
and the moldings
done in high gloss.
431
00:17:18,160 --> 00:17:18,860
Great.
432
00:17:18,860 --> 00:17:19,860
You have any questions,
433
00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:21,260
if you need anything,
I'll be in the back.
434
00:17:21,260 --> 00:17:22,060
Okay.
435
00:17:22,060 --> 00:17:23,160
So that's where
436
00:17:23,160 --> 00:17:24,460
the old bedroom is, huh?
437
00:17:24,960 --> 00:17:26,060
Sammy?
438
00:17:26,060 --> 00:17:27,760
What? I'm not
doing anything.
439
00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:28,860
You promised.
440
00:17:28,860 --> 00:17:30,160
No, I'm fine.
441
00:17:30,160 --> 00:17:32,260
All right, I want to start
442
00:17:32,260 --> 00:17:33,160
with, uh, sanding for you.
443
00:17:33,260 --> 00:17:34,360
Here.
All right.
444
00:17:34,360 --> 00:17:36,660
All right, uh,
try this post right here.
445
00:17:36,760 --> 00:17:37,960
Yeah.
446
00:17:38,060 --> 00:17:40,660
I'll do a little taping.
447
00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:50,560
Hey, come on.
Hey, Sam.
448
00:17:50,660 --> 00:17:52,460
What?
Sam, uh...
449
00:17:52,460 --> 00:17:54,160
you have to do it
with the grain, okay?
450
00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:55,760
Oh.
Sand with the grain.
451
00:17:56,760 --> 00:18:00,360
My arm hurts
when I do it like that.
452
00:18:02,060 --> 00:18:03,160
Very sorry, Sam.
453
00:18:03,160 --> 00:18:05,660
That's the way it
has to be done, all right?
454
00:18:05,660 --> 00:18:07,860
I don't think I like sanding.
455
00:18:08,860 --> 00:18:12,860
Just try to tape one pane
at a time, all right?
456
00:18:12,860 --> 00:18:15,960
I don't think I
like taping, either.
457
00:18:18,060 --> 00:18:19,160
Norm.
458
00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:20,660
Hmm?
It's Carla on the phone.
459
00:18:20,760 --> 00:18:22,760
Your wife needs you
at home right away.
460
00:18:22,760 --> 00:18:24,760
Something about two feet
of water in the basement.
461
00:18:25,460 --> 00:18:26,860
Oh, boy, that's serious.
462
00:18:26,860 --> 00:18:28,660
That's, like, a foot
more than usual.
463
00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:31,460
I'm sorry.
464
00:18:31,460 --> 00:18:32,460
It's just a little delay.
465
00:18:32,460 --> 00:18:34,060
I'll be right back.
No problem.
466
00:18:34,160 --> 00:18:35,560
Sammy, can I, uh,
trust you here alone?
467
00:18:35,660 --> 00:18:37,660
Yeah. Swear to God
I won't touch her.
468
00:18:43,860 --> 00:18:46,760
Tragic, huh?
Absolutely tragic.
469
00:18:46,860 --> 00:18:48,260
I beg your pardon?
470
00:18:48,260 --> 00:18:50,160
Oh, I just couldn't help
471
00:18:50,260 --> 00:18:52,760
thinking about Norm's basement.
472
00:18:52,760 --> 00:18:53,960
Yes?
473
00:18:55,060 --> 00:18:56,960
Well, it's not just, you know,
474
00:18:57,060 --> 00:18:58,660
the water filling up.
475
00:18:59,760 --> 00:19:01,260
You know,
it's those photo albums,
476
00:19:01,360 --> 00:19:04,260
those old letters.
477
00:19:04,260 --> 00:19:07,860
Cherished mementos, you know,
ru-ruined for...
478
00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:09,660
Oh, I'm sorry.
479
00:19:09,660 --> 00:19:10,860
Ooh, boy.
480
00:19:10,860 --> 00:19:13,360
Oh, this is embarrassing.
481
00:19:13,360 --> 00:19:15,460
I-I'm sorry.
I just, uh...
482
00:19:15,460 --> 00:19:17,660
I can't help feeling this way
483
00:19:17,660 --> 00:19:20,760
ever since my dog, Lucky, died.
484
00:19:22,360 --> 00:19:24,560
Something is going on here.
485
00:19:24,660 --> 00:19:27,160
I'm not exactly
sure what it is.
486
00:19:27,260 --> 00:19:28,760
Could it be that
487
00:19:28,860 --> 00:19:31,360
you're jerking me around?
488
00:19:34,060 --> 00:19:35,260
Okay, uh...
489
00:19:36,660 --> 00:19:37,960
I'm sorry.
490
00:19:39,060 --> 00:19:41,560
It's just that there's
a rumor going around the bar
491
00:19:41,560 --> 00:19:43,060
that you've got this soft side,
492
00:19:43,160 --> 00:19:45,360
and I just thought
I'd like to see it for myself.
493
00:19:45,460 --> 00:19:47,160
Maybe get to know you better.
494
00:19:48,460 --> 00:19:49,860
I guess I ought to just...
495
00:19:49,860 --> 00:19:51,060
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
496
00:19:51,060 --> 00:19:52,960
I want to get
this straight.
497
00:19:52,960 --> 00:19:55,060
You came over here
on your day off
498
00:19:55,060 --> 00:19:56,660
to paint my living room
499
00:19:56,660 --> 00:19:59,160
in hopes of getting
to know me better?
500
00:19:59,260 --> 00:20:02,160
Pretty silly, huh?
501
00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:03,460
What'd you want to know?
502
00:20:10,060 --> 00:20:10,560
Well?
503
00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:12,260
Um, I'm thinking.
504
00:20:12,260 --> 00:20:15,060
I-I didn't think I was
gonna get this far. Uh...
505
00:20:18,160 --> 00:20:20,260
Well, all right, all right,
506
00:20:20,260 --> 00:20:22,460
Um... where were you born?
507
00:20:22,460 --> 00:20:23,660
San Diego.
508
00:20:23,660 --> 00:20:25,360
San Diego.
509
00:20:25,460 --> 00:20:26,660
California, huh?
510
00:20:26,760 --> 00:20:27,460
No, Kansas.
511
00:20:28,760 --> 00:20:29,960
Come on.
512
00:20:31,560 --> 00:20:33,860
My father's a captain
in the Navy.
513
00:20:33,860 --> 00:20:35,160
My mother's an
interior designer.
514
00:20:35,260 --> 00:20:36,160
My brother's a surgeon.
515
00:20:36,260 --> 00:20:37,760
My other brother's an attorney.
516
00:20:37,760 --> 00:20:39,260
My sister was Miss San Diego.
517
00:20:42,160 --> 00:20:43,960
The only really happy moment
of my life
518
00:20:43,960 --> 00:20:45,660
is when I ran away
to San Francisco
519
00:20:45,660 --> 00:20:47,160
and hung out with Grace Slick.
520
00:20:47,160 --> 00:20:49,360
Do you want to know
the lyrics to "White Rabbit,"
521
00:20:49,460 --> 00:20:50,560
or can I quit now?
522
00:20:50,560 --> 00:20:52,960
Ah. Boy, it sounds like some
523
00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:55,760
of the kids in your family
are pretty successful, huh?
524
00:20:55,760 --> 00:20:57,660
Yeah, well,
if you measure success
525
00:20:57,660 --> 00:20:59,560
in terms of wealth, happiness,
526
00:20:59,560 --> 00:21:03,060
and my father's
undying devotion, maybe.
527
00:21:03,060 --> 00:21:04,360
Yeah. Boy, I know.
528
00:21:04,360 --> 00:21:06,660
I got a brother like that.
529
00:21:07,860 --> 00:21:10,160
International lawyer.
530
00:21:10,160 --> 00:21:13,460
Handsome, smart, funny.
531
00:21:13,460 --> 00:21:15,260
And the guy plays the piano,
532
00:21:15,360 --> 00:21:17,160
and he speaks four languages,
533
00:21:17,260 --> 00:21:18,360
flies his own jet.
534
00:21:21,460 --> 00:21:22,560
Seems like my whole life
535
00:21:22,560 --> 00:21:24,760
I've been trying to get out
from under his shadow.
536
00:21:24,760 --> 00:21:26,560
I know just what you mean.
537
00:21:27,960 --> 00:21:30,260
Does he ever come in the bar?
538
00:21:34,060 --> 00:21:36,160
No, but, uh, I'll call him,
539
00:21:36,160 --> 00:21:38,460
if you'll call Miss San Diego.
540
00:21:38,560 --> 00:21:40,060
Nah. They'd probably
541
00:21:40,060 --> 00:21:42,260
end up leaving together.
542
00:21:46,860 --> 00:21:48,460
Well, hell, this is kind of
543
00:21:48,460 --> 00:21:50,860
a warm and friendly moment,
isn't it?
544
00:21:51,660 --> 00:21:53,060
I must admit,
545
00:21:53,060 --> 00:21:55,760
it's a... better moment
than I ever thought
546
00:21:55,760 --> 00:21:57,260
I'd have with you.
547
00:21:57,260 --> 00:21:59,160
I'm glad this happened.
548
00:21:59,160 --> 00:22:01,960
Yeah, me, too. Me, too.
549
00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:03,260
Will you excuse
me a moment?
550
00:22:03,360 --> 00:22:04,860
Sure. What are you going
to do?
551
00:22:04,860 --> 00:22:07,660
I think I better change.
552
00:22:12,260 --> 00:22:13,360
Honesty.
553
00:22:13,360 --> 00:22:14,660
Who would have thought?
554
00:22:18,860 --> 00:22:20,060
Say, can I, uh--
555
00:22:20,160 --> 00:22:21,760
great, great--
can I, uh,
556
00:22:21,760 --> 00:22:23,360
put on some music here?
557
00:22:23,360 --> 00:22:24,660
Sure, be my guest.
558
00:23:04,960 --> 00:23:06,460
I'm gonna be at the gym
559
00:23:06,460 --> 00:23:07,960
for a couple of hours.
560
00:23:07,960 --> 00:23:11,260
But you just go right on...
561
00:23:11,960 --> 00:23:13,760
You jerk.
562
00:23:13,860 --> 00:23:15,860
Wha... what?
563
00:23:15,860 --> 00:23:17,960
This whole thing about
coming over here and painting
564
00:23:18,060 --> 00:23:20,460
is just another stupid
attempt to get me into bed.
565
00:23:21,860 --> 00:23:24,060
I-I am shocked and...
566
00:23:24,060 --> 00:23:27,160
and deeply insulted.
567
00:23:27,160 --> 00:23:28,660
God. I told you
all that personal stuff
568
00:23:28,660 --> 00:23:29,960
about my brothers and my sister
569
00:23:30,060 --> 00:23:31,960
and me being the fattest girl
in high school.
570
00:23:31,960 --> 00:23:33,360
Wait a minute.
You didn't tell me that.
571
00:23:33,360 --> 00:23:34,560
Well, I wasn't.
572
00:23:34,560 --> 00:23:35,960
Get out.
573
00:23:36,060 --> 00:23:37,360
Slow down here.
Just li...
574
00:23:37,360 --> 00:23:38,460
I admit it.
575
00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:40,660
I'm a attracted to you.
Now, what's the big deal?
576
00:23:40,660 --> 00:23:43,260
Is that a crime
or something?
577
00:23:43,260 --> 00:23:44,660
You know, are you
always this defensive
578
00:23:44,660 --> 00:23:46,060
about people who
find you sexy?
579
00:23:46,060 --> 00:23:47,760
No, just you.
580
00:23:47,860 --> 00:23:49,260
Is that right?
581
00:23:49,260 --> 00:23:52,160
Well... you know, I'll
tell you something, lady.
582
00:23:52,160 --> 00:23:54,460
There was a time when I was
considering making love to you,
583
00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:55,860
but now it's
out of the question.
584
00:23:55,860 --> 00:23:58,160
As a matter of fact, you know,
I wouldn't make love to you
585
00:23:58,260 --> 00:23:59,460
if you asked me,
if you begged me
586
00:23:59,560 --> 00:24:00,860
to make love to you,
I wouldn't.
587
00:24:00,860 --> 00:24:01,960
Go ahead, just ask me.
588
00:24:01,960 --> 00:24:03,360
Just try it.
See what happens.
589
00:24:03,360 --> 00:24:04,560
Would you make love to me?
590
00:24:04,560 --> 00:24:06,160
Well, okay, but just once.
41260
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