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Last time on Cheers:
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00:00:05,016 --> 00:00:07,416
Hey, Sam, me and Eddie
are getting married!
3
00:00:07,416 --> 00:00:09,316
She's, uh, quite a catch, Ed.
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00:00:09,416 --> 00:00:11,916
Seems that Eddie and I picked
the one day of the century
5
00:00:11,916 --> 00:00:13,916
when all the planets
and constellations
6
00:00:13,916 --> 00:00:15,216
are in perfect alignment.
7
00:00:15,316 --> 00:00:18,116
So we either get married
by 4:00 p.m. today,
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00:00:18,216 --> 00:00:19,816
or we wait until the year 2042.
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00:00:19,916 --> 00:00:21,516
This is going to be
an interesting wedding,
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00:00:21,616 --> 00:00:23,616
the two most superstitious
people in the world.
11
00:00:23,616 --> 00:00:25,516
Hey, hey, don't say that.
It's bad luck.
12
00:00:25,616 --> 00:00:28,716
Our love can conquer
any bad luck
that comes our way.
13
00:00:28,816 --> 00:00:29,616
Hey, that's my mirror.
14
00:00:30,516 --> 00:00:32,516
I mean it, Anthony
and Annie moving in...
15
00:00:32,616 --> 00:00:34,516
You don't want
to come and live
16
00:00:34,516 --> 00:00:37,316
in my little, tiny
overcrowded house.
17
00:00:37,416 --> 00:00:38,116
Your ma hating me...
18
00:00:38,216 --> 00:00:40,016
I'm so happy to meet you.
19
00:00:40,016 --> 00:00:40,816
Car-la.
20
00:00:40,816 --> 00:00:41,816
Anthony hating you...
21
00:00:41,816 --> 00:00:43,216
You are not my father...
22
00:00:43,216 --> 00:00:44,316
and you never will be.
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00:00:44,416 --> 00:00:44,916
Twins...
24
00:00:44,916 --> 00:00:45,816
I had twins once.
25
00:00:45,816 --> 00:00:47,916
It was the happiest
day of my life.
26
00:00:47,916 --> 00:00:50,616
Every time one
of these little,
piddly things came up,
27
00:00:50,716 --> 00:00:53,716
I kept thinking you were going
to say the wedding's off.
28
00:00:53,716 --> 00:00:55,116
The wedding's off.
29
00:00:59,816 --> 00:01:00,916
Afternoon, everybody.
30
00:01:01,016 --> 00:01:02,716
Norm!
31
00:01:02,716 --> 00:01:04,316
Hey, Mr. Peterson,
would you like a beer?
32
00:01:04,316 --> 00:01:05,616
No, I'd like
a dead cat in a glass.
33
00:01:09,716 --> 00:01:12,416
Men, you are looking
at one sharp bargainer.
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00:01:12,416 --> 00:01:14,416
Not only did I get
Carla and Eddie
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00:01:14,416 --> 00:01:17,116
eight sterling-silver
place settings, but
36
00:01:17,116 --> 00:01:18,616
I also got Bruce to throw in
37
00:01:18,716 --> 00:01:20,816
matching weenie tongs
and lemon zester.
38
00:01:22,616 --> 00:01:24,316
That's great,
man, except...
39
00:01:24,316 --> 00:01:26,116
the wedding's
been called off.
40
00:01:26,216 --> 00:01:28,316
Ah...
41
00:01:28,316 --> 00:01:29,716
So what happened?
42
00:01:29,816 --> 00:01:31,516
Eddie freaked out
about being a father?
43
00:01:31,516 --> 00:01:32,516
No.
44
00:01:32,516 --> 00:01:34,916
Eddie's mom met Carla.
45
00:01:34,916 --> 00:01:35,716
Hate at first sight.
46
00:01:35,716 --> 00:01:36,916
Yeah, how'd you know?
47
00:01:37,016 --> 00:01:39,716
Well, that's the "law" part
of "mother-in-law," see.
48
00:01:39,716 --> 00:01:41,516
So Eddie's not going
to marry Carla
49
00:01:41,616 --> 00:01:43,616
because his mother
doesn't approve.
50
00:01:43,616 --> 00:01:44,816
I tell you,
it's pathetic
51
00:01:44,816 --> 00:01:49,316
to see a grown man so tied
to his ma's apron strings.
52
00:01:49,316 --> 00:01:51,616
Well, that reminds me,
Mr. Clavin, you mother called
53
00:01:51,616 --> 00:01:54,016
and said she couldn't make it
for dinner tonight.
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00:01:54,116 --> 00:01:55,916
Oh, great. What
am I supposed to do
55
00:01:55,916 --> 00:01:58,516
with that casserole--
just throw it away?
56
00:02:08,316 --> 00:02:10,916
¶ Making your way
in the world today ¶
57
00:02:10,916 --> 00:02:13,916
¶ Takes everything you've got
58
00:02:13,916 --> 00:02:16,816
¶ Taking a break
from all your worries ¶
59
00:02:16,816 --> 00:02:19,916
¶ Sure would help a lot
60
00:02:19,916 --> 00:02:25,216
¶ Wouldn't you like
to get away? ¶
61
00:02:25,216 --> 00:02:28,016
¶ Sometimes you want to go
62
00:02:28,016 --> 00:02:32,916
¶ Where everybody
knows your name ¶
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00:02:32,916 --> 00:02:38,116
¶ And they're always glad
you came ¶
64
00:02:38,216 --> 00:02:40,116
¶ You want to be
where you can see ¶
65
00:02:40,216 --> 00:02:43,116
¶ Our troubles
are all the same ¶
66
00:02:43,216 --> 00:02:47,916
¶ You want to be where everybody
knows your name ¶
67
00:02:47,916 --> 00:02:51,016
¶ You want to go
where people know ¶
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00:02:51,116 --> 00:02:53,216
¶ People are all the same
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00:02:53,216 --> 00:02:57,716
¶ You want to go where
everybody knows your name. ¶
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00:03:19,816 --> 00:03:21,216
Mr. Malone,
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00:03:21,316 --> 00:03:24,316
remember that reception
you talked me into?
72
00:03:24,316 --> 00:03:26,216
Well, it seems that the bride
is in my office
73
00:03:26,316 --> 00:03:28,416
and she's having a little
problem with the groom.
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00:03:28,516 --> 00:03:31,816
She wants him to die
with festering boils.
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00:03:31,816 --> 00:03:34,216
It's just the usual
prenuptial jitters.
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00:03:34,216 --> 00:03:35,516
It'll be all right.
77
00:03:35,616 --> 00:03:36,916
It will notbe all right.
78
00:03:36,916 --> 00:03:38,716
I invited my boss,
79
00:03:38,716 --> 00:03:40,816
and he's really
excited about this.
80
00:03:40,816 --> 00:03:42,016
Now, if Mr. Drake
shows up here
81
00:03:42,016 --> 00:03:44,116
expecting a reception and
there isn't a reception,
82
00:03:44,216 --> 00:03:45,716
I'm gonna have egg
all over my face.
83
00:03:45,716 --> 00:03:47,816
Actually, uh, you know,
most complexion experts
84
00:03:47,916 --> 00:03:49,816
swear by the old
egg facial.
85
00:03:49,816 --> 00:03:51,716
It tightens one's pores.
86
00:03:53,216 --> 00:03:56,616
Although yours look
pretty tight to me.
87
00:03:59,016 --> 00:04:00,716
I want to talk
to you a minute.
88
00:04:00,716 --> 00:04:04,016
Miss Howe, I think I can get
this wedding back on track.
89
00:04:04,116 --> 00:04:04,916
Thank God.
90
00:04:05,016 --> 00:04:07,016
Yeah, but I have
one little condition.
91
00:04:07,016 --> 00:04:09,316
You pull this off and you can
have anything you want.
92
00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:10,416
Really?
93
00:04:10,416 --> 00:04:11,916
Except that.
94
00:04:12,916 --> 00:04:14,716
Actually, all
I want to do
95
00:04:14,716 --> 00:04:17,316
is get rid of
these stupid uniforms.
96
00:04:17,316 --> 00:04:19,316
Mr. Malone, ever since
you have worked here,
97
00:04:19,316 --> 00:04:20,516
you have done nothing
98
00:04:20,516 --> 00:04:21,716
but whine about
these uniforms.
99
00:04:21,816 --> 00:04:23,616
Now, I put a great deal
of thought into them
100
00:04:23,616 --> 00:04:25,916
and I happen to think
they make a statement.
Oh, yeah.
101
00:04:25,916 --> 00:04:27,616
They say I'm a lima bean.
102
00:04:29,516 --> 00:04:30,416
All right. Fine, fine.
103
00:04:30,516 --> 00:04:32,216
If you insist on
keeping these uniforms,
104
00:04:32,316 --> 00:04:33,516
then there'll be
no wedding,
105
00:04:33,616 --> 00:04:34,616
no wedding reception,
106
00:04:34,616 --> 00:04:37,616
and you and Mr. Drake
can spend an intimate evening
107
00:04:37,616 --> 00:04:40,916
watching 40 quarts
of guacamole turn black.
108
00:04:40,916 --> 00:04:42,616
Fine, fine.
109
00:04:42,616 --> 00:04:44,116
Get rid of the uniforms.
110
00:04:44,116 --> 00:04:45,216
Okay.
111
00:04:45,316 --> 00:04:46,316
Woody.
112
00:04:46,316 --> 00:04:47,416
Yo.
Get on the phone.
113
00:04:47,416 --> 00:04:48,916
Tell the church we're running
a little bit late.
114
00:04:48,916 --> 00:04:50,516
Cliff, see if you can
catch up with Eddie there.
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00:04:50,616 --> 00:04:51,416
You betcha.
Norm,
116
00:04:51,516 --> 00:04:53,016
stay in the office
and make sure Carla
117
00:04:53,016 --> 00:04:54,216
does not trash it.
Yes, you.
118
00:04:54,216 --> 00:04:56,416
Frasier. Go pick up
Carla's gown, will you?
119
00:04:56,416 --> 00:04:58,216
Right. Oh, say,
if anybody needs me,
120
00:04:58,216 --> 00:05:00,416
Just tell them
I'm at Gown-O-Rama, tra-la.
121
00:05:04,616 --> 00:05:05,916
That was all
well and good.
122
00:05:06,016 --> 00:05:07,216
Thank you.
123
00:05:07,216 --> 00:05:09,816
How do you plan on getting the
bride and groom back together?
124
00:05:09,816 --> 00:05:11,316
I'm going to rely on my wits.
125
00:05:11,316 --> 00:05:13,416
Well, you're
halfway there.
126
00:05:13,416 --> 00:05:14,616
You better believe it.
127
00:05:16,116 --> 00:05:17,016
Sam.
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00:05:17,116 --> 00:05:18,516
Father Berry at Carla's church
129
00:05:18,516 --> 00:05:19,516
said we gotta hurry
130
00:05:19,516 --> 00:05:21,216
because he's got
two weddings
131
00:05:21,216 --> 00:05:23,316
planned after Carla's,
a bake sale,
132
00:05:23,316 --> 00:05:27,216
a slide show of the Knights of
Columbus' trip to the Holy Land,
133
00:05:27,216 --> 00:05:28,916
and a CYO hootenanny.
134
00:05:28,916 --> 00:05:30,216
Thank you, Woody.
135
00:05:30,216 --> 00:05:31,716
Sam?
Mmm?
136
00:05:31,816 --> 00:05:35,716
I'm, uh... I'm thinking
of becoming Catholic.
137
00:05:38,316 --> 00:05:39,616
We'll talk about it later.
138
00:05:41,616 --> 00:05:43,916
Hey, Sammy, I got Eddie.
139
00:05:43,916 --> 00:05:44,816
Great. Where's Mama?
140
00:05:44,816 --> 00:05:47,016
I tipped the cabbie to
take her back to the hotel.
141
00:05:47,116 --> 00:05:50,016
You already paid
back that buck.
142
00:05:51,216 --> 00:05:52,816
I'm not gonna
marry her, Sam.
143
00:05:52,816 --> 00:05:55,516
I mean, I can't go
against mémère's wishes.
144
00:05:55,616 --> 00:05:56,916
Maybe some day,
after Mama gets to know her
145
00:05:57,016 --> 00:05:57,916
and starts to like her....
146
00:05:58,016 --> 00:05:58,916
Wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait.
147
00:05:59,016 --> 00:06:00,916
What about the planets
and the tea leaves?
148
00:06:01,016 --> 00:06:02,416
I mean, if you don't
marry her now,
149
00:06:02,416 --> 00:06:03,916
you're going to have
to wait till 2042.
150
00:06:04,016 --> 00:06:05,116
Sam, it's no use.
151
00:06:05,116 --> 00:06:06,416
I mean, maybe Carla's right.
152
00:06:06,416 --> 00:06:08,616
Ever since I saw her
on our wedding day,
153
00:06:08,716 --> 00:06:10,416
we've had nothing but bad luck.
154
00:06:10,516 --> 00:06:12,616
You know, I happen
to think that it's bad luck
155
00:06:12,616 --> 00:06:14,716
to be a jerk to the woman
you're in love with.
156
00:06:14,816 --> 00:06:16,316
Now, come on, Eddie.
157
00:06:16,316 --> 00:06:17,616
Just talk to her.
158
00:06:18,616 --> 00:06:20,416
Okay. I guess I could
just talk to her.
159
00:06:20,416 --> 00:06:21,516
Great, great,
160
00:06:21,516 --> 00:06:23,316
great, great, great,
hold that thought.
161
00:06:23,316 --> 00:06:24,916
How's it going?
Pretty good,
pretty good.
162
00:06:24,916 --> 00:06:27,116
It better be,
or my butt's in a sling.
163
00:06:27,216 --> 00:06:28,616
Is there room for two in there?
164
00:06:30,516 --> 00:06:32,216
Eddie's arm.
165
00:06:32,216 --> 00:06:33,516
His neck.
166
00:06:33,616 --> 00:06:34,616
How's it going?
167
00:06:34,616 --> 00:06:35,816
Oh, not too bad.
168
00:06:35,816 --> 00:06:37,216
I don't think
we've broken anything vital yet.
169
00:06:39,216 --> 00:06:40,216
Eddie's foot.
170
00:06:40,216 --> 00:06:41,216
Sweetheart.
Eddie's femur.
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00:06:41,316 --> 00:06:43,316
Sit down.
Hey. Stop, stop.
172
00:06:43,416 --> 00:06:45,516
Would you give the guy
a break, please?
173
00:06:45,516 --> 00:06:46,816
He had to break a mirror, right?
174
00:06:46,816 --> 00:06:47,716
He had to spill the salt.
175
00:06:47,716 --> 00:06:50,016
He had to thumb his
nose to the Fates,
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00:06:50,116 --> 00:06:51,516
and look what happened.
177
00:06:51,516 --> 00:06:53,816
They turned him into a wuss.
178
00:06:53,816 --> 00:06:56,416
The important thing is
that the wuss came back.
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00:06:56,416 --> 00:06:59,116
Does he have a note
from his mommy?
180
00:06:59,116 --> 00:07:01,216
Oh, come on,
just talk to the guy.
181
00:07:01,316 --> 00:07:04,316
I don't talk to
spineless jellyfish.
182
00:07:04,316 --> 00:07:06,916
All right, fine.
I'll just, uh,
183
00:07:06,916 --> 00:07:10,116
go out there
and tell him to leave.
184
00:07:12,116 --> 00:07:14,316
Hey.
185
00:07:15,416 --> 00:07:18,416
Does he look really
pathetic and cute?
186
00:07:18,416 --> 00:07:20,716
Have you ever seen a puppy...
187
00:07:20,716 --> 00:07:22,616
in the rain?
188
00:07:27,416 --> 00:07:29,216
Well...
189
00:07:29,216 --> 00:07:30,616
I guess I can
190
00:07:30,716 --> 00:07:32,116
let him off the hook,
but first!
191
00:07:32,116 --> 00:07:36,016
He has to come in here, get down
on his knees and sweat blood.
192
00:07:36,116 --> 00:07:37,516
He was hoping you'd say that.
193
00:07:39,216 --> 00:07:40,116
You're smiling.
194
00:07:40,116 --> 00:07:41,816
The wedding's on.
Oh, yeah.
195
00:07:41,816 --> 00:07:43,316
This uniform is almost off.
196
00:07:43,416 --> 00:07:46,316
Old engineer Sammy's
got the matrimony express
197
00:07:46,416 --> 00:07:47,916
right back on schedule.
198
00:07:48,916 --> 00:07:50,216
Eddie. Eddie, Eddie.
199
00:07:50,216 --> 00:07:51,916
Wait a minute, man. Whoa.
200
00:07:51,916 --> 00:07:52,916
Where you going?
201
00:07:52,916 --> 00:07:54,316
I can't face her
right now.
202
00:07:54,316 --> 00:07:56,216
I mean, even if I did
change my mind
203
00:07:56,316 --> 00:07:57,716
and decide
to stand up to Mama,
204
00:07:57,716 --> 00:08:00,116
Carla would never forgive me
for the way I ran out.
205
00:08:00,116 --> 00:08:01,816
I mean, if I went
in there right now,
206
00:08:01,816 --> 00:08:02,916
she'd tear my head off.
207
00:08:03,016 --> 00:08:04,216
Come on, Eddie.
208
00:08:04,216 --> 00:08:07,416
I think you're underestimating
Carla just a bit here.
209
00:08:07,516 --> 00:08:09,116
What, you don't think
she'll be mad?
210
00:08:09,116 --> 00:08:10,616
No, I don't think
she'll stop at your head.
211
00:08:10,616 --> 00:08:11,616
Norm...
212
00:08:11,616 --> 00:08:13,816
Listen, she wants
to forgive you.
213
00:08:13,916 --> 00:08:17,716
All you two need is a few
moments together in private.
214
00:08:17,716 --> 00:08:19,216
Okay, but could we
do it out here,
215
00:08:19,316 --> 00:08:21,116
where there are
plenty of witnesses?
216
00:08:21,116 --> 00:08:22,416
All right. Okay.
217
00:08:22,416 --> 00:08:23,716
Just sit down right here. Relax.
218
00:08:23,716 --> 00:08:25,816
If he even looks at the door,
break his legs.
219
00:08:27,216 --> 00:08:28,516
Sam!
220
00:08:28,516 --> 00:08:29,916
The wedding frock
you ordered.
221
00:08:29,916 --> 00:08:33,116
I got some pretty weird looks
on the bus with this thing.
222
00:08:33,116 --> 00:08:35,816
There was also one
rather interesting invitation.
223
00:08:37,416 --> 00:08:38,216
Sam.
224
00:08:38,216 --> 00:08:39,916
Father Berry.
225
00:08:39,916 --> 00:08:40,616
The other wedding party's
226
00:08:40,716 --> 00:08:42,516
starting to stack up
in the vestibule.
227
00:08:42,516 --> 00:08:44,316
Ah, I can't talk
to him now, man.
228
00:08:44,416 --> 00:08:46,216
I-I gotta talk to Eddie here.
229
00:08:46,316 --> 00:08:47,616
I just talked to Eddie.
230
00:08:47,616 --> 00:08:49,016
I gotta talk to Carla.
231
00:08:49,016 --> 00:08:50,116
Carla?
Mm-hmm.
232
00:08:50,116 --> 00:08:51,116
Carla.
233
00:08:52,816 --> 00:08:54,616
Father Berry?
234
00:08:54,716 --> 00:08:57,216
Listen, Sam can't talk
right now, but, uh...
235
00:08:57,316 --> 00:09:01,516
while I got you on the phone,
can I ask you a question?
236
00:09:01,516 --> 00:09:03,816
Do you have to pay
any membership dues
237
00:09:03,916 --> 00:09:06,416
to be a Catholic?
238
00:09:06,416 --> 00:09:09,216
I told you
I wouldn't
talk to him
239
00:09:09,216 --> 00:09:11,416
unless he comes
in here begging.
240
00:09:11,416 --> 00:09:14,216
Come on. Carla, we don't
have time for this nonsense.
241
00:09:15,516 --> 00:09:16,616
Hey, I got an idea.
242
00:09:16,616 --> 00:09:18,416
Get out of your clothes.
243
00:09:18,416 --> 00:09:21,716
Oh, Sammy,
any other time I'd love to,
244
00:09:21,716 --> 00:09:22,916
but, really...
245
00:09:23,016 --> 00:09:25,016
Well, I just think that,
you know, uh, you're sweaty.
246
00:09:25,116 --> 00:09:26,316
You're tired,
Maybe you'd
247
00:09:26,416 --> 00:09:28,516
like to change
into something else.
248
00:09:28,616 --> 00:09:30,616
Well, hey, like this,
for instance.
249
00:09:30,616 --> 00:09:31,716
No way.
250
00:09:31,816 --> 00:09:33,716
Oh, come on.
Just, just try it on.
251
00:09:33,816 --> 00:09:34,816
You know, see how it fits
252
00:09:34,816 --> 00:09:36,616
in case you want
to get married someday.
253
00:09:37,316 --> 00:09:38,416
Years from now.
254
00:09:38,416 --> 00:09:39,516
Years from now.
Well, you know,
255
00:09:39,616 --> 00:09:40,616
I might not be pregnant then.
256
00:09:40,616 --> 00:09:41,816
Right.
257
00:09:44,316 --> 00:09:45,016
Come on.
258
00:09:45,116 --> 00:09:46,216
Oh, what the heck.
259
00:09:46,216 --> 00:09:48,116
This might be the
last chance I get
260
00:09:48,216 --> 00:09:50,416
to see what I look
like in one of these.
261
00:09:50,416 --> 00:09:51,516
Yeah.
262
00:09:51,616 --> 00:09:53,016
Besides, I'm out 36 bucks.
263
00:09:56,516 --> 00:09:58,216
Eddie, Eddie.
264
00:09:58,216 --> 00:09:59,316
Sammy.
265
00:09:59,316 --> 00:10:01,516
I know what you're doing here.
266
00:10:01,616 --> 00:10:04,016
You think I'm going
to get all decked out
267
00:10:04,116 --> 00:10:05,816
like Miss Bride
of the Year,
268
00:10:05,816 --> 00:10:07,316
take one look
in the mirror
269
00:10:07,316 --> 00:10:09,616
and forget all about
being mad at Eddie.
270
00:10:09,616 --> 00:10:11,116
and I'm going
to go out there,
271
00:10:11,116 --> 00:10:13,216
and Eddie's going to
take one look at me
272
00:10:13,316 --> 00:10:15,816
and forget all about
his mother. Then,
273
00:10:15,916 --> 00:10:18,916
we'll march down the aisle
and live happily ever after.
274
00:10:18,916 --> 00:10:21,816
Am I right?
275
00:10:21,816 --> 00:10:22,916
Yeah, that's basically it.
276
00:10:23,016 --> 00:10:24,316
You got a problem with that?
277
00:10:26,616 --> 00:10:28,116
Nah, just checking.
278
00:10:28,116 --> 00:10:29,916
Here I come.
279
00:10:34,916 --> 00:10:35,816
Woo-woo.
280
00:10:35,916 --> 00:10:38,316
Sam...
281
00:10:38,316 --> 00:10:39,716
Do you really mean "woo-woo,"
282
00:10:39,816 --> 00:10:41,516
or are you
just saying "woo-woo"?
283
00:10:41,516 --> 00:10:43,916
No, no. I don't say
"woo-woos" lightly. Huh?
284
00:10:44,016 --> 00:10:45,916
Holá.
285
00:10:45,916 --> 00:10:46,816
Okay.
286
00:10:46,916 --> 00:10:47,916
Ah, look at you.
287
00:10:49,016 --> 00:10:50,816
Okay. Let's
give it a shot.
288
00:10:50,816 --> 00:10:52,316
All right.
289
00:10:52,316 --> 00:10:54,016
Sammy, zip me.
290
00:10:54,016 --> 00:10:55,216
Well, I'll be darned.
291
00:10:55,316 --> 00:10:57,016
These things go
up, too, huh?
292
00:11:03,616 --> 00:11:05,216
Oh, Carla.
293
00:11:05,216 --> 00:11:06,716
You look...
294
00:11:08,916 --> 00:11:12,416
That's the nicest thing
anyone's ever said to me.
295
00:11:14,216 --> 00:11:15,516
Oh... Oh, listen.
296
00:11:15,616 --> 00:11:17,016
Let's get to the church.
297
00:11:17,016 --> 00:11:19,016
We have to get married
before 4:00.
298
00:11:19,016 --> 00:11:22,716
Hot dog!
299
00:11:22,716 --> 00:11:24,916
Care to help me
with my pants?
300
00:11:33,016 --> 00:11:35,116
Carla? It's your church.
301
00:11:35,216 --> 00:11:36,816
Would you tell them
we're on our way.
302
00:11:36,816 --> 00:11:38,616
Well, that's just it.
They had to go ahead
303
00:11:38,616 --> 00:11:40,616
with the other wedding
and cancel yours.
304
00:11:40,716 --> 00:11:42,316
I knew it.
305
00:11:42,316 --> 00:11:43,516
I knew it!
306
00:11:57,116 --> 00:12:00,116
You're out of uniform.
307
00:12:15,149 --> 00:12:17,749
Dear friends, you have
come together...
308
00:12:17,849 --> 00:12:19,749
It sure was nice
of the Monsignor
309
00:12:19,849 --> 00:12:21,849
to let Carla and Eddie
get married here
310
00:12:21,949 --> 00:12:24,049
in the rectory chapel.
311
00:12:24,049 --> 00:12:26,449
Yeah, it was kind of nice
of us
312
00:12:26,449 --> 00:12:29,449
to buy all those raffle tickets,
too.
313
00:12:29,449 --> 00:12:31,649
Good Lord,
it's crowded in here.
314
00:12:31,749 --> 00:12:33,049
But on the upside,
315
00:12:33,049 --> 00:12:36,749
it does satiate any desire
I might have had to visit Tokyo.
316
00:12:38,149 --> 00:12:41,849
Edward, have you come here
freely without reservation
317
00:12:41,849 --> 00:12:44,949
to give yourself
to Carla in marriage?
318
00:12:44,949 --> 00:12:46,549
Edward?
319
00:12:46,649 --> 00:12:50,249
Carla, where's Edward?
320
00:12:50,249 --> 00:12:54,449
Carla? Where's Carla?
321
00:12:54,549 --> 00:12:56,949
Excuse me.
Excuse me!
322
00:12:57,049 --> 00:12:58,849
Lady with a baby.
323
00:12:58,849 --> 00:13:02,949
Excuse...
Would you get off the dress!
324
00:13:02,949 --> 00:13:04,449
All right, all right,
all right.
325
00:13:04,449 --> 00:13:05,949
Crank it up, Father.
326
00:13:06,049 --> 00:13:09,449
All the forces in the universe
say we have to be done by 4:00.
327
00:13:09,549 --> 00:13:10,849
Oh, no!
328
00:13:10,949 --> 00:13:12,949
Do you, Edward Raymond,
take Carla Maria Victoria...
329
00:13:12,949 --> 00:13:13,949
Hurry! Hurry! Please, hurry!
330
00:13:13,949 --> 00:13:17,149
Angelina Theresa Apollonia...
331
00:13:17,149 --> 00:13:18,849
Oh, rat!
332
00:13:18,849 --> 00:13:22,249
Why couldn't my parents
have named me Judy?
333
00:13:26,649 --> 00:13:28,849
Go on, go on, go on.
334
00:13:35,249 --> 00:13:37,049
Hey, here they come!
335
00:13:37,049 --> 00:13:38,149
Ladies and gentlemen,
336
00:13:38,149 --> 00:13:40,449
this is the moment
we've all been waiting for.
337
00:13:40,549 --> 00:13:44,049
Appearing for the first time
anywhere, the happy couple,
338
00:13:44,149 --> 00:13:46,049
Mr. and Mrs. Eddie LeBec.
339
00:13:51,849 --> 00:13:54,649
That's a keeper.
340
00:13:54,749 --> 00:13:56,449
Hey, guys, it's
your wedding day.
341
00:13:56,449 --> 00:13:58,149
Show a little teeth
here, all right?
342
00:13:58,249 --> 00:13:59,649
I can't, Sammy.
343
00:13:59,749 --> 00:14:02,549
We were pronounced
man and wife at 4:01.
344
00:14:02,649 --> 00:14:04,949
We might as well have
been pronounced dead.
345
00:14:05,049 --> 00:14:05,949
We're doomed.
346
00:14:06,049 --> 00:14:08,149
Music, music!
347
00:14:08,149 --> 00:14:09,349
Aw, come on, you guys.
348
00:14:09,349 --> 00:14:10,349
Think about all
the wedding gifts
349
00:14:10,349 --> 00:14:11,549
you got to open
over there.
350
00:14:11,549 --> 00:14:12,549
Yeah.
351
00:14:12,649 --> 00:14:13,549
I guess I should
be grateful
352
00:14:13,649 --> 00:14:14,749
Eddy didn't fall down
the church steps
353
00:14:14,849 --> 00:14:15,949
and break his leg.
354
00:14:15,949 --> 00:14:17,649
How is it, anyway?
355
00:14:17,649 --> 00:14:21,249
I think I just
wrenched it a little.
356
00:14:21,249 --> 00:14:24,249
They don't look
too happy to me.
357
00:14:24,349 --> 00:14:27,649
No. They do look married,
though.
358
00:14:31,049 --> 00:14:33,949
What's that
ugly-looking thing?
359
00:14:33,949 --> 00:14:36,349
It's not an ugly thing.
360
00:14:36,349 --> 00:14:38,749
It's a Wabby.
361
00:14:38,749 --> 00:14:43,349
What's a Wabby, Webecca?
362
00:14:43,449 --> 00:14:46,449
It's a "Women of Boston
Business" award.
363
00:14:46,449 --> 00:14:48,049
I'm very proud of it.
364
00:14:48,149 --> 00:14:50,749
It happens to be
very prestigious.
365
00:14:50,749 --> 00:14:53,449
Thousands of women
have won it.
366
00:14:53,449 --> 00:14:56,149
What's it doing
out here?
367
00:14:56,149 --> 00:14:58,349
You trying
to impress your boss?
368
00:14:58,349 --> 00:14:59,449
I'm glad
you reminded me.
369
00:14:59,549 --> 00:15:01,249
I'm completely
forgot he was coming.
370
00:15:01,249 --> 00:15:02,249
Yeah, sure you did.
371
00:15:02,249 --> 00:15:03,249
Hey, you know,
372
00:15:03,349 --> 00:15:05,949
every time Evan Drake's name
gets mentioned
373
00:15:06,049 --> 00:15:07,849
you get a little red
around the gills.
374
00:15:07,849 --> 00:15:09,749
Do you have
a crush on him
or something?
375
00:15:09,749 --> 00:15:11,349
I beg your pardon.
376
00:15:11,449 --> 00:15:14,149
He happens to be
a married man.
377
00:15:14,149 --> 00:15:16,549
Although not happily.
378
00:15:18,249 --> 00:15:20,749
Oh, you do have a crush on him.
379
00:15:20,749 --> 00:15:22,349
How cute!
380
00:15:22,349 --> 00:15:24,349
"Oh, Evan, Evan."
381
00:15:27,949 --> 00:15:29,749
Great stuffed mushrooms,
Cliffie.
382
00:15:29,749 --> 00:15:30,849
Try the Swedish
meatballs.
383
00:15:30,849 --> 00:15:32,549
They're out
of this world.
384
00:15:32,549 --> 00:15:33,649
Yeah.
385
00:15:33,649 --> 00:15:37,049
Ooh, try 'em together!
Together!
386
00:15:37,049 --> 00:15:38,749
Excuse me, gentlemen.
387
00:15:38,749 --> 00:15:39,949
Do you plan on leaving
388
00:15:39,949 --> 00:15:41,849
any hors d'oeuvres
for latecomers?
389
00:15:41,849 --> 00:15:43,849
Hey, you snooze,
you lose.
390
00:15:45,449 --> 00:15:46,749
Ooh-ooh! Rumaki!
391
00:15:46,849 --> 00:15:48,249
Come on.
392
00:15:52,249 --> 00:15:54,149
And now it's time
for the traditional first dance,
393
00:15:54,149 --> 00:15:55,949
and we all know who's going
to start it.
394
00:15:58,049 --> 00:16:01,349
Holy cow, it isn't me, is it?
395
00:16:02,649 --> 00:16:03,849
Let's welcome
396
00:16:03,949 --> 00:16:07,549
the happy couple Carla and Eddie
to the dance floor.
397
00:16:10,049 --> 00:16:15,049
¶ The greatest love
the world has known... ¶
398
00:16:20,549 --> 00:16:22,849
Hit me again, Harley.
399
00:16:22,849 --> 00:16:25,649
Third time's the charm.
400
00:16:29,849 --> 00:16:34,049
So, uh, where's your
big-shot lover boy?
401
00:16:34,149 --> 00:16:37,649
I told you
he is not my lover boy.
402
00:16:37,749 --> 00:16:43,149
The big shot SOB
is in a meeting.
403
00:16:43,249 --> 00:16:45,849
Choke on it.
404
00:16:45,949 --> 00:16:47,049
There's a happy pair.
405
00:16:47,049 --> 00:16:48,249
Say cheeseburger.
406
00:16:48,249 --> 00:16:50,149
Uh, no, no.
407
00:16:50,149 --> 00:16:52,349
All right,
that was a good one,
408
00:16:52,349 --> 00:16:55,449
even with Miss Howe's eyes
kinda gimpy like that.
409
00:16:56,649 --> 00:16:57,549
Oh, Norm, look.
410
00:16:57,549 --> 00:16:59,449
We forgot about
the dessert table.
411
00:16:59,549 --> 00:17:01,049
And we call ourselves
guests.
412
00:17:03,049 --> 00:17:06,049
Ma, you want
to trade partners?
413
00:17:06,049 --> 00:17:08,649
Why not?
I'm going to die.
414
00:17:08,649 --> 00:17:12,949
I'm going to dance
with my mother,
all right?
415
00:17:14,949 --> 00:17:17,249
How about a cup
of coffee, huh?
416
00:17:17,249 --> 00:17:19,049
Why would I do that?
417
00:17:19,049 --> 00:17:20,349
Well, because I've seen
418
00:17:20,449 --> 00:17:23,249
a lot of ladies hit
the champagne in my time.
419
00:17:23,349 --> 00:17:25,249
One minute
they're doing
just fine.
420
00:17:25,249 --> 00:17:27,649
The next minute
it kind of sneaks
up on them
421
00:17:27,649 --> 00:17:29,549
and they're doing
all sorts
422
00:17:29,549 --> 00:17:31,249
of wild and crazy...
423
00:17:31,249 --> 00:17:34,849
Why am I giving you coffee?
424
00:17:35,949 --> 00:17:38,149
So, Eddie,
425
00:17:38,249 --> 00:17:41,549
what's Mother Tortelli
like in bed?
426
00:17:52,049 --> 00:17:54,849
What are you
looking at,
pretty lady?
427
00:17:54,849 --> 00:17:57,349
I'm looking at you.
428
00:17:57,349 --> 00:17:59,849
Well, I'm looking
back at you.
429
00:17:59,849 --> 00:18:02,349
I think I'm beginning
to see you
430
00:18:02,449 --> 00:18:04,249
in a whole new light.
431
00:18:04,349 --> 00:18:07,549
Why don't you tell me
what you see?
432
00:18:08,949 --> 00:18:11,949
You have a really weird face.
433
00:18:14,949 --> 00:18:17,449
Your eyebrows
are growing together
434
00:18:17,549 --> 00:18:20,249
like a big old
ugly caterpillar.
435
00:18:21,749 --> 00:18:25,449
Oh, look,
they're cutting the cake.
436
00:18:49,849 --> 00:18:52,149
And now as the hour draws late,
437
00:18:52,249 --> 00:18:54,649
it's time for the bride
to throw the bouquet.
438
00:18:54,649 --> 00:18:56,549
Okay, come on, come on,
everybody.
439
00:18:58,449 --> 00:19:00,049
You all ready?
440
00:19:00,149 --> 00:19:03,749
Okay, heads up,
you old maids.
441
00:19:03,749 --> 00:19:07,049
Dr. Crane,
a girl's supposed
to catch the bouquet.
442
00:19:07,149 --> 00:19:08,649
Well, then the girls
should have been
443
00:19:08,649 --> 00:19:09,849
a little bit quicker.
444
00:19:09,849 --> 00:19:11,749
Here, knock
yourself out.
445
00:19:19,049 --> 00:19:22,149
I think it's time
for me to pack it in.
446
00:19:22,149 --> 00:19:22,949
Uh, you know,
I don't think
447
00:19:22,949 --> 00:19:24,349
you're in any condition
to drive, Miss Howe.
448
00:19:24,349 --> 00:19:25,549
Let me give you
a lift home, all right?
449
00:19:25,649 --> 00:19:26,749
I don't know.
450
00:19:26,749 --> 00:19:30,849
I've never been alone in a car
with such a hairy guy.
451
00:19:32,149 --> 00:19:35,349
Are you sure you weren't
in The Planet of The Apes?
452
00:19:36,249 --> 00:19:39,649
Can anybody else
please take me home?
453
00:19:39,749 --> 00:19:41,849
There's room in our car.
454
00:19:41,849 --> 00:19:43,349
You can sit on my lap.
455
00:19:43,349 --> 00:19:45,849
Darling, you're
married now.
456
00:19:45,849 --> 00:19:48,449
You don't have
a lap.
457
00:19:48,549 --> 00:19:51,649
Come on.
You think I'm so ugly?
458
00:19:51,649 --> 00:19:53,049
I'll let you get a bag
459
00:19:53,049 --> 00:19:55,149
and put it over my head,
all right?
460
00:19:55,149 --> 00:19:58,149
Just a minute.
Let me get my bag.
461
00:19:58,249 --> 00:20:00,449
And yours.
462
00:20:00,449 --> 00:20:04,149
I'm not crazy
about the way that girl flirts.
463
00:20:04,149 --> 00:20:05,449
And now, folks,
464
00:20:05,449 --> 00:20:06,749
as the lucky couple gets ready
465
00:20:06,749 --> 00:20:08,249
to embark
on their new life together,
466
00:20:08,249 --> 00:20:11,749
let's all throw some rice,
the symbol of fertility.
467
00:20:13,549 --> 00:20:15,049
Ow!
468
00:20:15,149 --> 00:20:17,149
Oh, ow!
469
00:20:17,249 --> 00:20:18,349
Ah!
470
00:20:18,349 --> 00:20:19,649
I can't go
out here, Eddie.
471
00:20:19,649 --> 00:20:20,649
Why?
472
00:20:20,749 --> 00:20:21,749
No, it's too dangerous.
473
00:20:21,849 --> 00:20:22,849
I'm okay.
474
00:20:22,849 --> 00:20:24,449
Who are we trying
to kid here?
475
00:20:24,449 --> 00:20:27,349
We're living
in the shadow
of the curse
476
00:20:27,349 --> 00:20:28,949
we brought
on ourselves.
477
00:20:29,049 --> 00:20:30,749
I can't go on
with this.
478
00:20:30,749 --> 00:20:31,749
Come on, Carla.
479
00:20:31,749 --> 00:20:32,749
No, no, no.
480
00:20:32,749 --> 00:20:35,549
I think maybe
we should get
an annulment.
481
00:20:35,649 --> 00:20:37,949
Oh, would you two
stop it?!
482
00:20:37,949 --> 00:20:38,949
I can't believe...
483
00:20:38,949 --> 00:20:41,049
This should be the happiest
day of your lives,
484
00:20:41,149 --> 00:20:43,249
and all you've done
is moan and groan
485
00:20:43,349 --> 00:20:45,149
all day long.
I mean, come on.
486
00:20:45,149 --> 00:20:46,349
It's one thing to play along
487
00:20:46,349 --> 00:20:48,949
with this superstition stuff
for, you know, for some fun,
488
00:20:49,049 --> 00:20:50,449
but you're letting it
interfere
489
00:20:50,549 --> 00:20:52,049
with your happiness here.
490
00:20:52,049 --> 00:20:52,949
You two
are wonderful.
491
00:20:53,049 --> 00:20:54,349
You got everything
in your life
492
00:20:54,349 --> 00:20:55,749
to look forward to.
493
00:20:55,749 --> 00:20:57,949
Please, please, come on.
Trust me.
494
00:20:57,947 --> 00:21:00,447
Nothing bad is going to happen.
495
00:21:02,947 --> 00:21:05,247
You got my personal word
on that.
496
00:21:05,247 --> 00:21:07,247
I mean, superstition,
it's for the birds.
497
00:21:07,347 --> 00:21:09,047
Just go on
with your normal life.
498
00:21:09,047 --> 00:21:10,747
Woody, do you mind?
499
00:21:10,747 --> 00:21:11,847
All right, fine.
Go ahead. Answer it.
500
00:21:11,847 --> 00:21:13,047
It's probably
just somebody who wants
501
00:21:13,047 --> 00:21:15,447
to, uh, know what time
the bar closes.
502
00:21:15,447 --> 00:21:17,647
We close at 2:00.
503
00:21:19,047 --> 00:21:20,447
Eddie, it's for you.
504
00:21:20,447 --> 00:21:22,247
Some guy
from the Bruins.
505
00:21:22,247 --> 00:21:23,347
Maybe, maybe you oughta...
506
00:21:23,447 --> 00:21:26,547
Probably just want
to congratulate me
on my wedding.
507
00:21:26,647 --> 00:21:28,447
Yeah, right.
That's it. That's it.
508
00:21:28,447 --> 00:21:30,647
Hello.
509
00:21:30,647 --> 00:21:31,847
Oh, hiya, Frank
510
00:21:31,947 --> 00:21:33,347
Yeah, how's it going?
511
00:21:33,347 --> 00:21:34,247
It's Frank.
512
00:21:34,247 --> 00:21:35,547
Yeah,
513
00:21:35,547 --> 00:21:37,747
uh-huh.
514
00:21:37,847 --> 00:21:38,947
Uh-huh.
515
00:21:40,247 --> 00:21:42,747
Uh-huh.
516
00:21:42,747 --> 00:21:44,647
Okay, yeah.
517
00:21:44,647 --> 00:21:48,147
Yeah, thanks a lot.
518
00:21:48,147 --> 00:21:49,947
Good-bye, Frank.
519
00:21:51,947 --> 00:21:54,147
Do I smell a bonus?
520
00:21:54,247 --> 00:21:56,547
They cut me from the team.
521
00:21:56,547 --> 00:21:58,447
They're going
with the youth movement.
522
00:21:58,447 --> 00:22:02,247
They tried to trade me,
but nobody wanted me.
523
00:22:02,247 --> 00:22:03,347
I'm sorry, Carla.
524
00:22:03,347 --> 00:22:05,147
I guess
all the superstitions
525
00:22:05,247 --> 00:22:06,947
finally caught up
with us.
526
00:22:07,947 --> 00:22:09,847
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
527
00:22:09,847 --> 00:22:14,047
I can blame a lot
of things on superstition,
528
00:22:14,147 --> 00:22:16,547
but you aren't
the greatest goalie
in the world, honey.
529
00:22:16,547 --> 00:22:18,847
What are you saying
to me, Carla?
530
00:22:18,947 --> 00:22:21,847
Well, you know,
the end of last year
you were losing it,
531
00:22:21,847 --> 00:22:24,647
and now you're older,
and your reflexes are shot.
532
00:22:24,654 --> 00:22:26,454
Oh, thanks a lot.
533
00:22:26,454 --> 00:22:30,254
I'm feeling a lot
better already.
534
00:22:30,354 --> 00:22:34,654
And if that wasn't
because of superstition,
535
00:22:34,654 --> 00:22:38,754
then maybe the twins
aren't bad luck either.
536
00:22:38,854 --> 00:22:40,854
Could it be possible
537
00:22:40,954 --> 00:22:44,254
that I'm just having twins
because the eggs split?
538
00:22:47,254 --> 00:22:48,354
Whoa, whoa!
539
00:22:48,354 --> 00:22:53,454
And maybe your mother hates me
because she's stupid.
540
00:22:55,154 --> 00:22:56,554
And Anthony hates you
541
00:22:56,654 --> 00:23:00,254
because he takes after
his no-good rat-faced father.
542
00:23:01,754 --> 00:23:04,854
And all those things
that we thought were bad luck
543
00:23:04,954 --> 00:23:07,954
had nothing to do
with superstition.
544
00:23:07,954 --> 00:23:09,754
It was just...
545
00:23:09,854 --> 00:23:11,854
life.
546
00:23:13,254 --> 00:23:16,454
Unfortunately,
it happens to be my life.
547
00:23:17,654 --> 00:23:21,054
What the heck?
548
00:23:21,054 --> 00:23:24,954
I'm married and in love
with a great guy.
549
00:23:28,554 --> 00:23:31,954
So, I guess
that evens things up.
550
00:23:31,951 --> 00:23:33,551
No, it doesn't.
551
00:23:34,851 --> 00:23:38,151
But it makes life worth living.
552
00:23:38,151 --> 00:23:39,351
No, it doesn't.
553
00:23:41,351 --> 00:23:44,151
But it's something.
554
00:23:44,151 --> 00:23:47,551
So let's get on with it.
555
00:23:47,551 --> 00:23:49,251
What do you say,
hubby?
556
00:23:51,651 --> 00:23:54,951
I say let's get on
with the honeymoon, eh?
557
00:23:55,051 --> 00:23:56,151
See you at 2:00 A.M.
558
00:23:56,251 --> 00:23:59,451
Somebody's got to work
in this family.
559
00:23:59,451 --> 00:24:02,451
Hi. I'm Mrs. Eddie LeBec.
560
00:24:02,551 --> 00:24:04,251
What'll you have?
40581
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