Original subtitles

Hello.., good evening everyone. Not all here yet, I see 1a

Oh well not to worry

- Good evening Giovanni. - lt's not good anything.

- Why? What's the matter? - l've got a terrible overhang.

- The word is hangover. - Whatever it is, l've got it.

l drank too much vino (wine) at lunch time.

lt's fatal to drink at midday.

- Good evening, Max. - Oh please, don't speak too loud.

l'm thinking, you've been also looking on the wine too much.

That's the trouble. He's not looking, he's been drinking like me.

Why did you drink so much?

lt was the feast of my patron saint, Saint Maximilio.

So we had a drink.

Then we drink to my patron, Saint Jivani.

Then we've a drink for my patron.

- Then one for the Pope. - Archimides.

- Leonardo Da Vinci. - Vernila Marcelli.

- Sophia Lauren. - And after that...

l remember nothing.

Me neither.

Yeah, you better go and sit down gently.

Excuse me, please.

Ah... that way.

Danielle is late this evening. However we carry on without her.

As you know, in a few weeks time...

you'll all be taking your lower Cambridge.

So tonight l thought l'll give you an oral examination.

You are wanting to look at our tooths?

No I mean, I'am gonna go around the class and ask you all...

to give me some answers.

l hope to get some correct ones.

- We are having a quiz? - Yes, sort of

- Like Mister Mind. - Master Mind.

Yes please.

Exactly, that's not a bad idea, Ali. Let's make it competitive.

You have a knock out competition.

You mean, like the big punch up?

No, only verbally. l'll go around the class...

and whoever fails to answer correctly, drops out. Alright?

Now where should we start? Yes, Jamela.

l'll give you an easy one to start with.

- What is the plural of goose? - Goose?

- Yes. One goose, two...? - Gooses.

She's knocked out.

- The plural of goose is geese. - Oh ha, geese.

l'll come back. Let's have another one.

Let me see...

- What is the opposite of good? - Not good.

l prefer you would have said bad, but we'll accept that.

Giovanni, what is an epistle?

That's easy.

An epistle is the wife of an apostle.

- Cuts you out. - l'm wrong?

An epistle is a letter.

Max, give me another word for forward.

- McDonald. - McDonald?

Yes, he plays forward for Arsenal.

l didn't mean that forward. Another word for moving forward.

- Advance? - Advance. Yes, good, well done.

- Anna, another word for debunk. - Debate.

No, it means, to ridicule.

Ali, correct the following sentence.

Last night, l'm going to the cinema.

Last night, l'm not going to the cinema.

- Wrong. - lt is not wrong.

Because last night, l'm not going anywhere at all.

You should have said, "last night, l went to the cinema"

l'm telling you, l didn't went.

lt doesn't matter whether you did, or didn't. You're out. Alright?

l'm sorry l'm so late, Mr. Brown.

That's alright, Danielle. Were you held up by the traffic?

No, l was held up by a man.

Good heavens! You mean a mugger?

l do not know his name.

But he works as a woodwork teacher here in the school.

One of the teachers here tried to rob you?

- No, not rob me... - Well, surely not...

- He was trying to chat me up. - Ahh, l see!

He wanted to take me out.

You want, l give him a punch of fives.

- He's bigger than you, Max. - Everybody is bigger than Max.

Hey! Watch what you're saying.

Now listen, this is school, so...

- Okay, come h-outside. - Alright, settle down, you two.

Come on. Don't worry about it, Danielle.

l'm sure this woodwork teacher, whatever his name is...

was only trying to be friendly.

But he was trying to be more than friendly.

He would not let me go pass until I agreed to have dinner with him.

This does seems to have been rather persistent.

Then... eureka! What do you say? l had a brain wash.

- Wave. - Yes.

l tell him l cannot go out with him...

because l'm engaged to be married.

Very good. Quick thinking.

- There's only one problem. - What was that?

l tell him l'm engaged to be married to you.

- Me? - Yes.

- lt was a good idea, yes. - lt was a good idea? No.

- Did anyone overhear you? - Only Gladys.

Oh great! lt's as good as putting it on the news at 10pm.

lt'll be all over the school by now.

You say that Mr. Brown is engaged to his French student?

That's right. L heard her tell Mr. Javis in the tea room.

This is absolutely disgraceful.

l think he might have the decency to tell me first.

- Tell you? - Yes. lt's most inconsiderate.

Oh dear! l'm sorry, l didn't know.

- Didn't know what? - Oh nothing... nothing.

l must be getting back.

Gladys, did you tell anything to Ms. Courtney about Danielle and me?

- Only in passing. - Oh great!

l didn't mean any harm. l had no idea she felt that way.

- What way? - About you.

- What are you talking about? - Unrequited love.

You and her ladyship. She fancies you.

- Don't be ridiculous! - Oh, it's true.

She was very upset when she heard about you and Danielle.

Gladys, l don't now where you got this ridiculous story from.

You are completely mistaken.

No, l'm not. l heard her.

She told you that she fancied me?

Not in so many words, but l new.

lt was written all over her face.

- l can't believe it. - Yes, it's not unusual though.

Lots of older women fall for younger men.

My sister ran off with a 30 year old milkman.

- Really? - 65 How old was your sister?

Ms. Courtney has always given me the impression she didn't like me.

Oh well, women are very funny.

And she's at a funny age.

You can say that again.

Well, best of luck.

Come to think of it, you're not far off it yourself.

Enter!

Miss Courtney.

Well well! lf it isn't the college Casanova.

l've come to explain about that.

Are you sure you can spare the time?

lt's a complete misunderstanding

You see, l'm not really engaged to Danielle.

She only said that to stop one of the teachers from pestering her.

- Really? - lt's perfectly true.

The chap who takes woodwork class was trying to chat her up.

- Mr. Javis? - ls that his name?

l've never met him. She concocted the whole thing...

just to get out of an embarrassing situation.

- l see. - l'm terribly sorry.

- Especially in view of... well... - ln view of what?

- l'd hardly like to mention it. - But you have mentioned it.

So you might as well continue.

Let me say right away. Lt's a perfectly natural thing to happen.

- What is? - For one person to be attracted to

another despite the difference in their ages.

What two persons are you referring?

You and I.

- You and l? - Yes.

Mr. Brown, l had no idea you felt like that about me.

Pardon?

Well, as you said yourself, it's perfectly natural.

Oh, you poor dear boy.

- Ms. Courtney, you don't understand. - Oh, but l do.

Men have always found me rather fascinating.

Yeah, I'm sure they have. Look, let me explain.

There is no need to apologise for the way you feel.

- Of course it's out of question... - But, Ms. Courtney, please...

Now don't start groveling.

- You'll get over it. - Yes, l suppose l will.

And now l suggest you go and quash this foolish rumor...

about you and your French fiancee.

Right, l'll do that. Thank you.

- And Mr. Brown. - Yes, Ms. Courtney?

Don't worry about this utter little affair.

l shalln't tell a soul. Your secret is safe with me.

You're very kind.

Poor fellow.

- Give me a kiss, come on. - Mr. Brown!

Danielle, why aren't you in the classroom?

l'm trying to explain to Mr. Javis what I said between us it not true.

Yeah, it's every man for himself, is it now?

l'd appreciate it Mr. Javis if you stop pestering my student...

if you don't mind.

A bit sensitive are we? Took of the green eyes is it?

Certainly not.

Come on then, as they say in this lovely lady's land.

"Ferme-la bush" Shut your gob!

Don't you speak to Mr. Brown like this!

- He'll get aggressive. - Oh really?

- He's not frightened of you. - Oh, aren't you?

- Well, l'm not. - No, he's not!

And if you're not careful, he'll hit you.

Danielle, you can let him try.

Loo Javis, l'm not in... - And he's ready whenever you are.

Right! Tonight, after class, in the yard.

We'll have a punch up!

- Here you are, Mr. Brown. - Thanks Sid.

- Have you drop a tidly? A tidly wink - Huh? Tidly wink?

- A drink - Oh drink

- Couple jack a danddy - Jack a danddy?

A shot of brandy, get you strength up in the big fight.

- No thanks. - Please yourself.

I supposed its all over the school?

The news has got around.

Hey listen, l can give you a few tips.

- Few tips? - Yeah, l used to beat them right.

- Fight? - You've got it. You've got it

l'll tell you what to do.

You put your hands up like that. You stand, and you start weaving.

All of a sudden, you do the under shuffle, and you one, two!

- l'm sorry. - Actually, l feel rather nervous.

- Oh, it's your analiddin ain't it? - Analiddin? 209a

- Adrenaline? - Oh, you should know.

But, you should be alright, one you beat him a couple of times.

lt's him hitting me that's worrying me.

Perhaps I'll have a quite word with him, he might forget the whole thing.

Listen, you can't back off right now. There's a principal involved.

Well let her fight Mr. Javis. They're more evenly match

Listen, it's a point of honour. You musn't let Mr. Javis know you're frightened of him.

I think he knows already.

l'll see you later. Don't forget the one... two.

- Professore - Yes Giovanni?

- This fight... - What about it?

We'll show you how to win. When you get in the ring...

first, you smash him in the stomach.

When he comes down, you knee him on to the chin.

No. Much better, chop him on the neck.

No, no, no. First, you hit him in the throat...

and then you butt him in the stomach.

Alright, alright! No more fighting. You're here to learn English.

Don't forget why you're here.

Right. Now whom haven't l asked questions so far?

Right. Su Lee, give me the comparative and superlative...

of the following adjective.

- Rude. - Lude, luder, ludest.

Right.

Ranjeet, complete the following proverb.

A bird in the hand...

Makes mess on your wrist.

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

You're out.

Danielle, explain me the meaning of the word illiterate.

That is someone whose parents are not married.

No Danielle, that's illegitimate.

Sorry.

- Juan - Si senor 242a

Give me the opposite of the following words.

- Ready? - Not ready.

- l haven't started. - l have started.

- Won. - l lost.

- That's enough. - That's not enough.

- Stop. - Go.

- Sit down. - Stand up.

Oh! Somebody stop him, please.

- Silencio - l do good, huh? 250a

- Yes, good. - You're so good talento

- Taro - Ah so

Give the following tenses of the word, 'to move'.

Past perfect, present perfect, past continuous.

- Well say something, Taro - l'm out.

Right, who do we have left with?

Well let's see how many of you can survive another round.

- Jamela, you count up to ten. - Ji (what)?

- Count up to ten. One, two, three... - et, tu, ting, chan, pa...

- ln English. - One...

- Two... four... - Three.

- Six. - Four. Sorry Jamela.

Max. Give me another word...

or explain to me what is the meaning of sentext.

lt is a tax you pay when you go to the church.

No, it means, sentence construction.

- Su Lee, spell democracy. - C. H. I. N. A.

lf supposed I ask you to spell dictatorship, you'll spell out England.

Or America.

Well Juan, that leaves only you.

lf you can answer the next question correctly...

you'll be the brain of the class.

Which doesn't say an awful lot for the rest of them.

- Por Favor? - Don't mind a thing.

Now, here is your question.

What is another name for a valley between two mountains?

- Valley between two mountains? - Si. Yes

- Pass. - Correct.

- So right? - Yes

l win! l am the brain! The big brain!

Yeah, it comes with your big head.

Don't start! Please sit down.

- Excuse me, Mr. Brown. - Yes Ali?

- lt is home going time. - Not quite.

But you are wanting to get ready for your big fight tonight...

with the woodpacker teacher.

We are wanting to be there in time to see you knock that stiffing out of him.

There's not going to be any fight.

- You do not mean that. - l do.

Santa Maria, what about all the money we bet?

Money? You mean, you are betting on the result?

Sure. We all put in one pound each.

- Ten pounds for me to win? - No, we backed the other fellow.

- Thanks a lot. - No, l'm only joking.

Sure, we backed you to win.

- You ready then? - Ready?

Yeah, for the fight.

Yes, the fight. Look, could l have a word with you Mr. Javis outside?

- Well. - Look, we are reasonable men.

l'm not.

Look, I'm sure we can settle this amicably.

- Yeah, I'm sure we can - Ah good 301a

After I knocked up your block off

Ah! Just the two persons l wanted to see.

What's all this l hear about a fight?

Just a private matter between Mr. Brown and meself.

Nonsense! lt's common knowledge throughout the whole school.

Now step into my office, shut the door behind you...

and take heed for l shall not tell you again.

l will not have members of my staff brawling in public.

- l absolutely forbid it. - You do?

- Most definitely. - Oh, good. L mean, what a pity.

l was quite looking forward to it.

That's not the impression l got.

You mean to tell me, that you were actually looking forward to this fight?

Oh yes. Beside, there was a point of honour at stake.

- What point of honour? - Well, this person insulted Miss Danielle Favre.

He forced his attentions on her.

l see! Male chauvinism, eh Mr. Javis?

Well, why not? Women like to be dominated.

Nonsense!

Come now, Ms. Courtney, man is by nature the hunter.

This puts an entirely different complexion on the matter.

- lt does? - Yes.

Much as l abhor fighting...

l see this under the circumstances perhaps your motives were justified.

So, we can have a little punch up in the eye.

- Certainly not. - Thank goodness

We will settle your difference in a more civilized and sporting manner.

l quite agree. How about a game of chess?

The school has a perfectly good gymnasium.

lf you must knock each other about, l suggest you do it there.

Tomorrow night, after class.

- Where is Mr. Brown? - He's just putting his gloves on.

Here he comes now.

Sit down, please. l have something for you.

What's that?

You put this in your gloves, and he'll fall flat.

But it will break my wrist too. No, thank you. 337a

Alright, excuse please

No Taro, you do that after each round.

Alright... quiet please!

Ladies and gentlemen, this is a three round contest.

Three minutes each round.

On my right, from the woodwork department, Nigel Javis.

And on my left, from the language class, Jeremy Brown.

Now listen, l want a good clean fight, remember this.

l want no scratching, poaching, grouching, hitting below the belt.

Shake hands now. Come back fighting.

Second round.

Good luck, Mr. Brown. 348a

Oh dear, oh dear. Come on

- Stool? - No, it's not over yet.

- Look at that - He's supposed to having a fight, not a dance.

Alright, you've asked for it! I'll give you the old Ali's shuffle

One, two... one, two.

One, two, three, four, five...

Go back to your corner. You big puff

- You are getting him very worried. - Yeah, his worry is going to kill me.

- We're going to lose our money. - We've got to do smoothing.

l've got an idea.

Hey, that's a good idea.

- Mr. Woodwork, you box real good, you know - Thanks

- Listen, you boxed before? - Yeah, once or twice.

- In the ring, your Mr. Brown doesn't stand much of a chance.

Maybe. Somehow l don't think l'd like to be in your shoes.

One, two... five...

Good evening everyone.

Mr. Brown, l want to thank you for what you did last night.

- You were so brave. - Oh, it was nothing really.

- Mr. Brown, Mr. Brown! - What is it?

- Oh blimey, he's at it again. - Who's at it again?

That woodpecker teacher, Mr. Jarvis.

He's maikng advantages to Jamela.

Advances.

Yes please. So l'm giving him a kick in his backside.

Now he's challenging me to a punch up.

Oh, not again!

l don't think you should go through with it.

l mean, with all due respect, you are not as experienced as l am.

That is what l'm thinking. So, l'm telling this to Mr. Jarvis.

Good.

The fight is taking place tonight in the gymnasium.

l'm sorry, l thought you were not fighting him.

Oh no, not me, but l'm naming you as my substitute