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I've put together the most valuable
lessons that have helped me achieve more
out of my life. Hopefully, they're
useful for you, too. Enjoy. This is
brutally honest advice for poor people.
I've been there. I had to pay rent.
Every night, I would think if I didn't
wake up tomorrow, I would be okay with
it. And I don't want that for anybody. I
get it.
I was just going through all these old
files yesterday and I saw a goal that I
had written, which was to make $10,000 a
month income. And so it was 13 years
ago. And so like I viscerally remember
what that was like. Um and I know I
never I was in so much pain during that
during that time that I get it. And so
like the reason we make this stuff is
cuz I I've been there and I don't want
that for anybody, you know? Like I
missed I missed my 20s. Like I just I
didn't have them as people traditionally
say it, you know? Like it's it's weird
because in today's like internet culture
like I started my I I started my first
brickandmortar business like storefront.
I was 23. Like I didn't know [ __ ] about
[ __ ] Like I knew nothing. And like I
didn't know you could hire employees.
Like it wasn't a thought. Like I didn't
know anything. Um, and so like I
cleaned, I did the billing, I did the
sales, I taught the sessions, like I
fixed the equipment, like I did
everything because I didn't know you
could and I also I did I didn't know and
I didn't have the money, frankly, to
afford anything else. And so, um, I get
it. Like I get I get I get it. Um,
but to get out of that, you have to take
steps. And the first step is saying that
it's my fault. The second step is that
you have to use what you have.
And so in the beginning I would I would
you know I I was reading the self-help
books and all this stuff. And um none of
them really hit for me because a lot of
it was like power of positive thinking
and like affirmations and like all this
stuff. And the reason I make the content
I do now, which has now almost become
like a shtick, um, countering that is be
is because it didn't work for me. And
I'm trying like I'm not trying to speak
to everybody. If you if that works for
you, then like awesome. Like awesome.
Like I people mistake me saying this is
what worked for me with this is what I
think everyone should do. And it it
couldn't be further from the truth. I'm
saying if what h what you have been
doing hasn't been working, then consider
this. which is that like I remember
because I just read this yesterday. The
intro in the book I say um I wish I
could tell you that the reason I was
able to make it out of the gym
was because I was like really passionate
about changing people's lives and I
loved fitness and I loved you know my
clients faces when they would light up
and they'd step on the scale and they'd
lose weight. They'd be able to fit in
their high school clothes again. It was
none of that. It was just the sheer
anger that I had, but the idea of being
wrong and having the people back home
be right about everything. And I just
couldn't I couldn't I mean I still can
barely tolerate it. And so I mean I took
in some ways and this isn't a I don't if
woe is me is the right is the right term
but like I had an otherwise very
successful career. like I was in a white
collar job and sometimes it's hard like
I mean hey I don't know I haven't been
the other situation but taking a step
down and humbling yourself to minimum
wage after you've been in a white collar
situation not easy and I remember I had
clients who walk in and be like oh did
you did you uh did you go to college and
they were saying that um patronizingly
um and mind you everyone here at least
this channel knows that I don't I don't
give a [ __ ] um but they were saying it
to basically like when I was going to
like write something down, like am I
literate?
And in those moments again, it was like
I could be right or be rich. Like I
could try and humiliate them back
because the pain of what they just said
made me feel. They probably didn't even
intend that.
Or I can be like, "Yeah, yeah, I went to
I went to school. I'm very grateful for
it." You know, like so what are your
goals? I could just move right past it.
And so you develop that skin because I
had to cuz I had to [ __ ] pay rent.
And so I mean I tell stories about
having a kid drawing marker on the wall
while I'm trying to close his mom and
he's writing in permanent marker and I'm
trying not to lose my [ __ ] over the fact
that I'm have to repaint the wall
because she doesn't know how to parent a
child. But I needed to close the card to
pay for the paint. And so it's like I
can scold the kid and lose the sale or I
can close the sale and keep my cool and
then eventually clean the clean the
wall. And so like you only get that
stuff by doing it. Um, and so if you're
in if you're in a place right now where
you don't have a lot, you only have one
thing, which is time. And so you have
lower leverage. So I'm not going to lie
to you and say that you like you're
there there's this one play, this one
secret. No, it's just it's sheer brute
force. Like you have to will yourself
out of it. Like there's you have to do
it's it's like a it's a it's a huge
amount of of soul driving energy that
you have to do outside of what you
normally do. So it's like you have to
live one person's normal life. You have
to do your normal work, your normal job.
You have to eat, you have to sleep, you
have to clean, you have to do whatever
else and then then the workday starts.
So that is how you eat today, but you're
trying to get ahead and you have to eat
tomorrow. And so you have to you have to
you have to eat the glass so that you
can take the pain today and you're
trying to take as much of the pain from
tomorrow as you can today so you can get
ahead and like the even the concept of
getting ahead. I like I think about this
visually which is like if you have this
this timeline of life that you can pull
towards you and it's glass in the
beginning and then it's slightly less
less coarse and then less coarse and
then it gets and then it gets neutral
and then it starts to get a little bit
sweeter and a little bit sweeter and a
little bit sweeter but you have to get
through that glass period where you pull
it towards you and I do have this theory
that like on a long enough time horizon
and if we could live a thousand years
everyone would eventually be successful
but people wait too long and they die
too early and I say die too really on a
long on a long timeline. And so I want I
have to live today and tomorrow and the
next day so I can live three days at a
time so I can get to my second and third
life's benefits now. And so that was why
like I remember the only times that I
took off when I was when I was at the
gym and one of the biggest things that I
was grateful for with the gyms is that I
moved across the country and so I knew
no one. I was in Huntington Beach. I was
from Baltimore like no one. And what
would happen, so one of the gifts of
that was that once the week was over, so
my Saturday sessions were done at like
noon, my phone didn't ring. No, like in
some ways very sad because like no one
wanted to see Alex, you know what I
mean? Like no one was inviting me out.
But I was like, well [ __ ] like I got to
make this work. And so I would just I'd
sit there and I'd be like, how do I sell
memberships? How do I market? How do I
everything, you know? But I but that was
how I got ahead. And so I I tell the
stories of like I remember when I when I
stopped watching the Ravens and I was
from Baltimore, so that was like like a
tie to home.
And so um yeah, it's fresh for me cuz I
just read the story yesterday, but it
was like it was tough.
I'll catch my breath. So, all that to
say,
the sacrifices that I encourage people
to take are not sacrifices I did not
make.
And I I don't say that there there's
there's no ways to to get there. I'm
just saying that this is the way I got
there.
And if this path works for you, then
maybe it works better than what you're
doing right now, which is I had a lot of
pain.
And so I I tried to use it. I just used
what I had. I just, you know, I was just
angry. I didn't I didn't want to fail.
And so I just kept going. And so there
was no like there just wasn't another
option. And so I think that's like
that's what I would encourage people to
think about was like they're just there
I just didn't I didn't allow another
option because the other option was just
was just worse than dying because
I mean I've told this story before and
things get hyperbolized mean you know
exaggerated romanticized whatever but
like when I had my big consulting job I
was making good money and I had the
approval of my my peers and all this
stuff and I just didn't want to wake up
the next day every day and it wasn't
like I was trying to kill myself. It
wasn't that. But I was I every night I
would think if I didn't wake up tomorrow
I would be okay with it. And so
when I knew that that was what I was
going back to if I didn't make this
work. I just had I had no plan B. I mean
I had plan B is that I would drive Uber
and strip. I joke about that. But that
was very much my plan B if I didn't make
it work. Um, but
and I I I get I get grilled on social
media for saying this because of like
[ __ ] race wars, but like there have
been slaves for thousands of years.
There were slaves in Egyptian times.
There were Jews who were slaves. There
were Persian slaves. There were white
slaves. There are backslaves. Humans
have enslaved one another. Period. And I
like to think of things in extremes
because it allows me to think about
what's possible. And so the idea that
someone else at some other time in
history has worked seven days a week,
every hour that they're awake with a
threat not of their own death, but of
their children's death, because that's
what I would do if I were trying to
control somebody. I would take their
kids and say, "I'll kill them if you
don't work." And guess what? They'll
probably work. That that capacity
exists. And so I would think to myself
like
I would try and I would try and put
myself in that frame so that I wouldn't
get into the woe is me cycle and think
all these things I could blame for why
I'm here right now. Why isn't this
working as fast? Like how is it that
these guys are making more money than
me? Like why don't these people will
give me the respect I deserve? Blah blah
blah blah blah. Um and just say like
what can I do now?
And then just every hour of every day,
well, what can I do now? And so it was I
have to learn how to market. I have to
learn how to sell. I have to I have to
go to these these groups that where
other gym owners are and I got to learn
their stuff. I got to I got to go to
these seminars. I got to save up so I
can learn some stuff. And that's what I
did. And so that's how I got out of it.
That visual of life as this like bloody
game of tugof-war where like most people
their hands just get too
>> cut to keep holding on to the rope is
like it's in it's stuck in my head.
>> Yeah.
>> It's that's really powerful.
>> Yeah. It was tough.
>> So I'm I'm
the first 100 grand is the hardest. And
I know that that sounds like an
unfathomable amount of money. It took me
five years. Like I get it. So, like
you just have to save it $1 at a time.
Like that's like that's what it is. Now,
obviously I talk about other things.
Like
there are smarter ways to make money for
sure. Like if you can sell expensive
stuff, you can just move the decimals.
Like I mean like the thing is is
it is factually true. It is spiritually
false. And I don't even believe in
spirituality in general, but like it is
it is tough to sell a $10 million
building and make a million dollar
commission or a $500,000 commission when
you are broke as [ __ ] It is very like
it is like you would have to become a
different person, which is why most
people's first sale is not that. But is
it technically possible? Yes. A lot of
people watch YouTube and the internet
for complex money-making skills and they
haven't even mastered showing up on
time. And so it's like they want to go
straight to calculus, but they don't
know how to do simple addition. But the
thing is is that like simple addition is
foundational to that. And none of the
other stuff will matter unless you can
do the basics. But the basics doesn't
make them less important. Usually
they're the foundation of a building
which make them arguably more important.
They just are simpler to understand but
not simpler to do. And I think that's
the big disconnect a lot of people have
is that they think they because they
understand something conceptually that
they feel like they have already
mastered the skill which are two very
different things.
And so one of the most common traits
that people who are poor have is that
it's always tomorrow. And so they never
talk about anything in terms of today.
And so it's about starting tomorrow, the
diet tomorrow, the diet on Monday, next
year, my New Year's resolution. It's
always it's always pushing off. So
rather than uh delaying gratification,
they delay pain. And so rather than
trying taking pain now for pleasure
later, they take pleasure now and pain
later. And so they flip the equation.
And so they're surprised when today is
later from yesterday that they're in
pain. Because if if last week you were
like, I'm starting my diet this week,
then it is now this week and you've
delayed the pain to today. And that
means that the body you have right now
is the result of the delayed pain that
you are now forcing yourself to endure.
And so
they're somehow surprised when the bill
comes due that they pushed off from the
past. And so the first lesson of getting
out of poverty is two words. It's my
fault. It's I have to own that. And I
think my fault you can kind of
extrapolate to right now. Not like you
basically have to own everything that
passed to this moment. So, all the pain
that I've gone through, all of the
Mondays that I've missed, all of the
diets that I've skipped, all of the
savings I haven't made, all of those are
not my dad's fault, my mom's fault, my
circumstances fault, the country I was
born in's fault, the zip code, any of
those things fault. It's just mine. And
the thing is is that people have this
belief that because they have a strong
argument for why it's something or
someone else's fault that that somehow
helps them.
And it just doesn't because whatever you
cast blame to is where you also cast
power to. And so if I say I can't
succeed because my mom didn't love me,
guess who controls me? My mom. And so if
you also like replace my mom with a
race, a gender, a political party,
whatever the thing like I can't succeed
because of Trump's laws. I can't succeed
because of the radical left, because of
wokeism, because of whatever. You
actually give that thing more power in
your life than you give yourself. And so
it's completely it the thing is is that
and this is what's so deceiving about it
is it's very it's very um
self-fulfilling is that you get more
evidence and you get more confirmation.
You get more evidence, you get more
confirmation, and the more your life
sucks, the more you're confirmed that
you were right. But like, do you want to
be right about the fact that your life
sucks
or would you rather like there's a
there's I think it's an old Zig Ziggler
saying he said you can either be right
or you can be rich. And I mean it's
simple, but this is what he was getting
at is that you can say, you know what,
you are right. Your dad kicked the [ __ ]
out of your whole life and you don't
have any confidence because he told you
a piece of [ __ ] every day. You're right.
But in order to be rich, you need to let
that go. Because every day you say that
I'm not successful because of this, it
means because this now owns you. And for
me personally, that realization that the
thing that I hated most in the world,
the things that I blamed for why my life
wasn't the way it was, I was their
[ __ ] And just realizing that um made
me angry. But through that anger, I was
able to say, "Well, [ __ ] them." like I
will succeed despite the fact that my
dad said this or my mom said this or
Barack Obama said this or Trump said
this or the woke left says what? Despite
that, despite the fact that the chips
are stacked against me, I will still
win. Why does saying my fault and taking
that accountability begin to set someone
down the path of making more money?
>> And so if you think about if we think
about success in terms of layers like
foundations, right? the the the base
level like when you're digging the
building where you put the hole and you
pour the concrete and the base of the
entire thing is who is in power? Who is
source? Because if it's anything but you
in that base layer, all of the other
things on top of them will topple down.
It's it's a foundation of sand.
Otherwise, you can't build on top of
blaming other people. There's nothing
that stands on it. You see like I want
to learn sales but I can't learn sales
because I didn't get hugged enough as a
kid and so I don't like people. And so
as long as you keep holding on to that
you have sand as your foundation. But if
you want to learn how to sell or you
want to learn how to market or you want
to learn how to do whatever until you
say well it's my fault that I don't know
it
and because of that it's within my power
to change it.
>> So it's not sales books. It's not it's
not reading offers. It's not it's not
even your books
>> at the at the very beginning you have to
accept that which is the first two words
my fault my responsibility all me I am
source
and then once you can accept that one
thing and what's crazy is that that one
foundation is where 90% of people
literally aren't they're not there they
can't do it the reason my girlfriend
left me is because of this not me the
reason I lost my job is because my my
employer was a dick my boss sucked
whatever the economy Like but like it
never serves you. Like give me one
instance, one example. This is to anyone
who's listening to this. One example of
when you blame something else and it
made you better.
One. You can't find it because it's
fundamentally not true. And so you
cannot both desire to get better and
also maintain blame. You have to pick.
>> When did this really hit home for you?
Was it when you lost money?
>> No, when I was 19 years old, I had to
write an essay about uh depression in an
intro to sight class. And I used to I
don't talk about my mother my mother
very much, but I used to harp a lot. I
was an equal I was an equal opportunity
angry person. I was angry at everybody.
In other words, I blamed everyone. And
so I blamed her for X, Y, and Z. And I
remember having to write this
essay on depression and you had to do it
from someone else's perspective. And so
you had to say how would they how would
the environment and their upbringing
things like that contribute to
the outcomes in their life. And so by
writing the essay, true or not, to be
clear, about my mother's upbringing and
how hard she had as an immigrant coming
here, getting beat up as a kid, getting
made up for not being able to speak the
language, all that kind of stuff. And
this was in the [ __ ] 50s. It's when
like it was more accepted to beat up
foreigners rather than let them in.
Anyways, um
so she had a tough time and so it made
sense and and when I framed it like
that, I was like, you know, maybe she's
actually a massive success given where
she started. And so then I thought to
myself, now mind you, I still wasn't
over it. But it was in this process that
the first thing that happened is when I
went back home for fall break or winter
break, I remember she said something to
me which would normally just like be the
beginning of some big fight. you know,
you get into these routines. Like, I'll
say this thing that we both hate and
then we'll just get in a nice fight
about it. And she said the trigger and I
was just like,
I understand you. I'm sorry you went
through the stuff you went through. And
she just like looked completely shocked
and then just like started balling. And
so I was like, we're cool. Like you
don't anger me anymore. And I think for
the most part since then, like that's
been more or less the dynamic that
shifted.
But leading into that was also the idea
that all the relationships that I had
had that id blamed for not working
because of the dynamic that I had with
my mother. I was like I am giving her
this power over my love life.
That's gross. And so I was like well I
I'd rather just say it's on me to change
and not have my mom or parents at all
involved in my relationships. And so
that was me taking it's her fault that I
can't make these things work. I have
commitment issues. I don't want to get
close to people. I've been hurt before.
Blah blah blah. To like, okay, well,
let's take it to the next extreme.
Great. You're right. You'll never be
close to anyone. You'll never have a
relationship that'll last. You're right.
Now what?
I remember I was at a conference and I
had this lady stand up in the crowd and
I had just done a thing on like I don't
remember what it was called offers and
she stood up and said let me give you
six reasons why this isn't going to work
for my business and so she went down her
list and I was like uh-huh uh-huh
uh-huh. So I got to the end of the whole
thing and um she said and that's why
this isn't going to work for my business
and I was like you're right you'll never
be able to make this work for your
business. And she looked at me like
angry and she lashed back. She was like,
"Yes, I yes I will. I'll be able to make
this work for my business for this
reason, this reason." And so the thing
is is that like if the victim frame is
just taken to the natural extreme, you
realize that you're right, you win the
game. And by being right the entire
time, you lose everything. And so it's
one of these frames that I love. Dr.
Cashy says this. He says, "You're 99%
right, but 100% wrong." And what that
means is like
for example, if I every time I bring a
girl home and I want my parents
approval, I bring her home and they say,
"This isn't the one. This isn't the one.
She's not good enough." Whatever it is,
every time it's easy for them to say
that because every single person you
date, except for the one you marry, they
are right on. And so they're 99% of the
time they're right. And they're
confirmed by saying that that person
that you bring home is not good enough.
Because every time eventually you break
up, oh, it's not going to last. This
isn't the one. and it keeps going,
right? But if you keep doing that all
the way to the natural extreme, you're
100% wrong because you will be wrong
eventually. It's the same thing as like,
I want to start this business, it's not
going to work. It's not going to work.
The second one will work. The fifth one
won't work. The seventh one work won't
work. And they're right, but they're
just wrong on the long enough time
horizon because one of them will [ __ ]
work. And one of the girls or one of the
guys that you bring home will be the one
that you are going to be with. But it's
so much safer for them to be right and
right and right and you and they get
deceived by their short-term rightness
that they miss the long-term wrong. And
we do this to oursel too when you're in
the victim frame. I don't even like
using the victim frame, but when you're
in the powerless frame, you give the
power away and you get to be right over
that's why it didn't work. This didn't
work. This relationship won't work. This
job won't work. You keep it's not going
to work this time either. Because you
get to be right over and over again. and
it makes you feel good in the short
term, but in the long term, you
guarantee the loss.
>> I think there's also like social
reinforcement. Like we love to complain
about the weather and
>> it's literally the same thing as never
investing. Like if you want to invest
your money, right, and you like you have
all this big pile of savings. If you
ever invest, there's always the
possibility that it goes down in the
short term. It's just the nature of
markets in general. But if you never
invest, you guarantee that you will
never get rich over the long haul. And
so every day you could make this risk.
You take a small risk, but you guarantee
a macro win. So you take a small risk
today, potential for loss today for the
guarantee over the long haul that it
grows and it makes you money. But the
flip side is you don't take the small
risk of loss today. You take the comfort
today for the guarantee that you get the
long loss. And so so many people flip
their life to that same thing is that
they have they flip the pleasure for
today and they and they they just forget
the second half of this which is pain
for tomorrow and that today is also
yesterday's tomorrow and we're living
through the pain that you cast like you
own this and until you're like this is
my fault that I'm in pain today because
of decisions that I put off pain for
tomorrow where today is tomorrow. When
you're broke, every dollar means so much
to you.
But
and you want to see the dollars in your
bank account go up. But I never made
that my goal. I made the amount of money
I made every month my goal because I saw
that as my like potential energy versus
stored energy. Not to get I mean
whatever physics people, you get what
I'm saying. And so I was willing to take
that stored energy and reinvest it to
take $5,000 a month in income to make it
$6,000 a month because I knew that over
a year I was going to make 12. And so if
it cost me two to make the 12 in income,
I would make that trade every time. And
so whenever I'd save up a small like
nut, now obviously I've always been
pretty good at about spending money.
Like I I' I haven't had that that habit.
So like again foundations like first
it's your fault. Second spend less than
you make. Third, take all of the excess
and spend it on making more because if
you're making minimum wage, I'm gonna
say what you probably already know.
You're not going to get ahead. Like,
you're not going to save your way there.
You're not like, everyone loves to tell
the story of that one girl at
McDonald's, but you know, they don't
tell the other 100 million people who
worked at McDonald's over over the world
who didn't make it. And like the outcome
they're talking about is like she made
$8 million over 40 years working
McDonald's. like you can shoot for more.
And so like take the money you make,
live on nothing, and the hard part is to
swallowing the pride for the fact that
in the short term, everyone's going to
be right when they say that you're
amounting to nothing. And that's the
tough part. That's the glass that you
have to you have to swallow that. You
have to pull towards you. And there's
just no other way. Like you have to
learn the skills. Now, I mean, to be
fair, YouTube didn't exist
when I was doing this. And like
Instagram was like a new platform. So
like all this stuff like the stuff we
have today is crazy. Like the fact that
these videos and this podcast like all
the stuff didn't ex like I remember when
podcasting came out like I was already a
business owner. Like none of this stuff
existed. But at the time I just took all
the money I had. And I I want to I want
to make this point again is that people
think that the money is about buying
courses and stuff like that. And you can
like there's nothing wrong with that.
I've learned a ton from a lot of the
stuff that I've bought to be really
honest with you. But I think that I've
always had an amazing return on
education because I always did it. And I
think like I always wanted to be the
best student in every class and I was
good at school and I and I I just took
business as a different another another
type of school. But part of the expenses
that come into like what you take that
money for is experiments that fail. And
so one of the things that happens when
you're broke is that you bet on stuff
and then it doesn't work and people feel
like they're back at zero. But you're
not back at zero. you're at where you
were plus one experience, plus two
experiences, plus three experiences,
plus four experience. But when you have
plus 18 experiences, all of a sudden,
boop, you level up one. You get
experience points. There's a reason in
video games call experience points. So,
you didn't trade it for nothing. You got
an experience point. And with enough
experience points, you get to the next
level. And so, I think if you just even
thought about it like that, it's not a
loss, but an experience point. It could
get you could bridge the gap between
your current income level and the income
level that you want to get to. And then
guess what? There's more experience
point that you have to get there. And
those experience points also cost more
money. Because when you take a bet in
the beginning, and when I say it costs
money, it's like if you run an ad and it
doesn't work, it costs money. If you
want to set up a Shopify store or an
e-commerce store and you spend 30, 40,
50 bucks a month, whatever, it costs
money. Um, and it does, you know, like
all of these things cost money to start.
Now, mind you, it cost a lot less than
it did in the 20s when you had to
mortgage your house and guarantee that
you'd win or you'd lose everything
forever. Um, so like the bar hasn't
never been lower than it is now, but
there still is a bar and you have to get
over it. And I still think that the vast
majority of the [ __ ] that people trying
to get over has nothing to do with the
difficulty of business. But the first
step, the foundation, which is it is my
fault that I am here and in it being my
fault, I am the one who can get me out
of it. It sounds like in that stage
three when you start experimenting and
investing in that and let's say the kid
who has a failed drop shipping
experiment or starts a school group and
they want to win the school games but
they don't. Their measuring stick for
whether or not they're doing well
shouldn't be how much money they're
making
>> or should like should they be thinking
about money at that point or
>> so the wealthiest people I know
only think about skills. They think
about what can I learn and then what can
this skill get me? And so they will
always
take any money they can to buy more
skills.
And in the beginning, you have to buy
all the skills yourself. Once you have
enough skills that you can generate an
excess of income, you can start buying
other people's lives. And what I mean by
that is like everything comes down to
buying time. And so at some point you're
10 years into your career and you have a
handful of skills, but you can buy
someone else's 10 years of skills by
just paying them to do something, too.
is you don't have to learn all those
things. And so you do need to get good
at stuff and then eventually you
generalize to being good at people. And
that's pretty much always the path for
everyone.
>> Maybe the framing is like a lot of
people who are wanting to make more
money just don't know what the avenues
are.
>> Yeah. So a lot of people who want to
make money don't understand how money is
made. And so it's made by getting it
from someone else and they have to give
it to you voluntarily or it's theft. And
so assuming you don't want to steal,
then you have to give something to
someone else first. And then by doing
that, they give you money in exchange,
which is why I love capitalism. It's
voluntary exchange between two parties.
And both parties say thank you at the
end because both parties think they're
better off from the trade. And so the
idea is what you want to be able to do
is find something valuable to trade. And
so you can either trade stuff, you can
find a place where you can get stuff and
then bring it to other people where it's
convenient for them so they pay you more
than you did when you had to go find it
at some back alley cuz you know suburban
mom doesn't want to go into back alley
to get x y and z but you'll give it to
her. Man, it sounds like I'm explaining
drugs, but
well, there's a reason they make money.
But anyways, point is is that you can
sell stuff at a mar at a margin and a
part of that margin is going to be the
convenience that you deliver them. And
either you're selling stuff that someone
else manufactures or you create your own
stuff. Now, if you're starting out,
you're probably going to sell someone
else's stuff. And I do think and I I
mean I'm saying this right now,
I do love the concept that the first
thing you sell is not the last thing
you're going to sell. And so learning to
sell in and of itself, the best way to
learn to sell is sell something. And
that's why uh referral referral uh
programs, ambassador programs, affiliate
programs for different types of
businesses, almost every business I've
ever owned has an affiliate program. Um
it's great to enroll in those. I'm not
even going to say any of the names of
the companies that that we have because
I want you like it's not about that. I
want you to if you can just because then
you you only have to figure out one
skill. Like if I just sell someone, if I
just promote, I get paid. Cool. And I
can just do it over and over again. Now
over time you're like, man, I want to
make more of the nut. Cool. Then you
just you eat up more of the
responsibility.
So you can either sell stuff or you can
sell skills. You can scale sell
outcomes. And so that's where you
develop a certain expertise. So like in
the beginning for me and like the first
time this ever like the first money I
ever made from a stranger was that I had
a lady at the gym. It's a real story. I
was in really good shape. I like to
think so. And she said,"Will you meet me
uh and do a nutrition consultation for
me?" And she didn't even say that. She
said, "Will you help me with my food?" I
think is what she said. And I said,
"Sure." Um, and so we met at a at a
pizza place, ironically.
>> No, this was after college. This is
after I graduated from college um when I
was still consultant. So I I went we met
at a pizza place. And I was like, "Okay,
well, what are you currently eating?"
And she was like, "This." And I was
like, "Well, what do you want to do?"
She's like, "I'm trying to lose weight."
And I was like, "Well, this is something
I eat for breakfast that's less calories
than your thing. It's pretty good." And
try this and try this and try this. And
it took like an hour. And then um I had
like a notepad and I gave her the the
notes or whatever. And she took out her
purse and she wrote $200 on a check and
she handed it to me. She was like,
"Thanks so much." And I was like
looked I was just like looking at the
check, looking at her, looking at the
check, looking at her. And I was like,
"Okay, don't act surprised." And I was
like, "Uh, thanks." And then she left
and I was like, "Holy shit." I was like,
"I just got paid for." But like
realistically, I'd been in at this point
I was competing. So I'm winning. I'm
like I had a state record at that point.
Like I was in I was in shape, you know
what I mean? Um and I think she knew I
was a state record holder cuz the gym
that I was powerlifting gym. Um but I
had done some stuff. I had gotten some
level of authority on some tiny thing
and people were like, "Oh, can you help
me with that, too?" And to be really
honest with you, my entire life, and I'm
saying like there's many paths, but like
my life has been
learn something, get good at it, have
evidence that you were good at the
thing, and then people ask you for help
on that thing. And so, in the beginning,
people asked me how to get in shape. And
then I started a business around getting
people in shape. And then people who had
businesses around getting people in
shape asked me how I was getting my
businesses that were getting people in
shape to work. And then people who had
businesses that were national scale that
helped people in a specific niche or
industry started asking me how I was
helping people in a specific niche or
industry. And then people who had really
big businesses just started asking me
how did you get a really big business?
And so like my entire life been simply
doing as hard as I [ __ ] could to get
good at something and then do it enough
times. And to be really like very clear
with you, every time I did it, it was
not to move on to the next step. It was
to just get good at the thing. And then
by getting good at the thing, people
asked me about it. And so it wasn't like
I lost 10 pounds and then tried to start
selling, you know, weight loss advice. I
had multiple state records and I like
I looked good, you know what I mean?
Like I was in very good shape. And then
people started asking me about it. And
then I didn't have one gym and start
telling people, hey, here's how you run
a I had six gyms by the time I was 26.
And then people were like, okay, you're
26 and you have six gyms and you did all
cash flow. Like you're doing something
right. And then people started asking me
about the stuff. And then and then when
I had the licensing business doing 4
million a month, people who had other
bigger businesses are doing a million a
month or 500,000 a month. They're like,
"How do you get to 4 million a month?"
And I was like, "Well, this is what I
did." And so, like, I've just tried to
figure it out. And it's it's like the
path has always been revealed as I took
more steps. And so, I think a big
fallacy in the early on days is trying
to think that you're going to figure out
the entire path before you even take the
first step.
>> It's just not true. Real quick, I have
the most amazing offer for you, which is
all three of my books for free. Uh, just
cover the shipping. I think it's like
five or six bucks in shipping uh per
book. Um, you get the actual hardback
shipped to you. And the reason for that
is because some of you guys may know we
had 3.6 million copies that were donated
from entrepreneurs. And I'm doing my
part to give the books away, but I'm
also giving the other two books uh to
anyone who want them, who choose to
redeem it. All right. Last time I made
this offer, uh, it sold out in like 10
days. Uh, so I did buy a lot more books.
Um, so if you see this, you know, go
check it out. Go grab them. Um, these
are obviously while supplies last. Um,
because this lives in the video forever.
And if you get there and it's not there,
then, you know, don't get upset. All
right, back to the video.
>> I was going to ask, how important is it
for someone to have that moment with the
check where they just make their first
Oh,
>> I mean, in some ways, I think it's
everything. In other ways, it's nothing.
Like one of the cool um shameless plug
for school, the um
30.44% of people who finish their first
month of school make their first dollar
online. And that's like so like
like that's why we do it. You know what
I mean? Like I know how hard that first
dollar is. Like there's so much to get
the first dollar across the because the
second dollar comes so much faster after
that. Um that I mean that's why that's
why I invest in the company. That's why
I'm so adamant about it. But um anyways,
the the point is is that yes, I think
having the first dollar get across is
very important. But if you can reframe
it from that experience points
perspective, that there's there's
there's probably three levels before
that. You have to like level one is that
you have to understand that it's my
fault. Level two is that you have to use
what you have, not what you wish you had
to get to where you want to go. And
where you want to go isn't 100 steps
forward. It's just the next step. And so
like I don't think that anger drives me
as much as it used to,
but it was everything that I had when I
started. And so if I had listened to the
positivity mantra when I started, I
never would have gotten going because
nothing made me feel happy. And so they
were like, "Follow your passion." I was
like, "My passion is to not be poor and
to not be here in Baltimore. That's my
passion is not be here." And so that's
what drove me. And so I think that it
just needs to be restated that like
is that the goal? Sure. But is that
necessary to start? No, it's not. And so
I can tell you that even when I was
angry um and getting through that,
making more money did make my life
better. Like I had more ability to deal
with inconveniences, hassles, health
issues from family members that I had to
foot the bill for. Like all these things
like money can provide value. And so,
um, I'll say this thing that a mentor
told me. He said, "Money does not buy
happiness, but it can help you avoid
pain."
And so, like, I think there's nothing
wrong with getting with making money.
Obviously, I like doing it. Um, but I
just hate
the people who espouse that you have to
feel a certain way to win or that or
that winning when you are angry or sad
or in pain or ashamed is somehow wrong.
And so I just like you have to meet
success where you're at. And if the
first step you have to take out of anger
and the next step you have to take out
of sadness and the next one you have to
take out of shame and use that to to
propel yourself forward. All that
matters you take the step.
And one of the things that I always like
is for a very long time I didn't
consider myself a good person. I mean, I
still probably don't, but um in terms of
like I I always identified with the
villain um and the oppressor in most
scenarios, which is bad. But anyways,
but I there's a point to this is that I
never thought that I deserved
the good life. I never thought I didn't
think I deserve the happy ending. I'll
put it that way. And so
the thing that got me through that was
the idea, and this felt like honestly
like gaming the system. So like from the
evil side, was that I could still get
the good guy's ending if I just did the
thing that they do to get the ending. So
I didn't have to do it with pure
intentions. I didn't have to do it as a
great guy, but if I just still did the
things, I could still get the getting.
And I think for me that that realization
has been why my ruthless focus on like
well what did you do? And to everyone
who listens to my stuff like it's like
great throw the emotions out. Throw the
spiritual energy vibrations out. What do
you do?
Patience is just figuring out what to do
in the meantime. Like courage is acting
as though you weren't afraid. Like like
what do you do? And then eliminating
everything else and then just doing that
and then doing whatever mental tricks
you have to do which is like there were
slaves who work seven days a week. So
can I like and then alternatively
catastrophizing
the alternative path which is that if I
do not do anything
this is what will happen eventually that
pain in the future will be my pain today
and then actively thinking about what
that pain would be like and then seeing
if that can make you more uncomfortable
than the comfort that you're in. And I
think I mean I think Tony Robbins says
this. He says change happens when the
pain of staying the same sorry when the
pain of change is less than the pain of
staying the same. And so if you're
comfortable in staying the same the
point is to make yourself more in pain
to get yourself to move. And so I think
there's a skill in being able to future
pace and think through what pain you're
going to go through. Like if you're like
man okay I have gained 5 pounds a year
and it has been four years so I'm 20
pounds up. Well, if four years from now
I'm another 20 pounds heavier and
imagining the snide comments at the
holiday party or the if you're a girl,
the guy who says, "Man, she'd be really
cute if she lost 40 lbs." Or like even
like I'm I'm going girls perspective
here. A guy who says something that's
like, "Um,
I would be with her, but she's just
she's just too fat. She's just not cute
enough." And you're like, "Wow, that's
so politically incorrect." Deal with it.
It's [ __ ] life.
But the thing is is like your thoughts
don't need to be politically correct.
They're your thoughts. They're no one
else's thoughts. And so whatever you
have to do to get yourself there. And
for me, the idea that a girl that I
would want to be with would be like, I
just don't think he's ambitious enough.
I don't think he's successful enough.
Like that those ideas killed me. And so
I never wanted to be denied entry to
somewhere because I didn't have these
things. Now, do I believe that people
should be denied entry? No. But I also
realize that's the way the world is. And
so you I think you can balance both
beliefs. Like I'd love things to be
different, but I accept the fact that
they're not.
>> Does this feel like a good argument for
getting rid of other broke friends?
Because I bet other broke friends reduce
the pain of staying the same.
>> A friend who supports you is someone who
deliberately
decreases the possibility of failure.
And so if you look at your friends and
you ask yourself, does this person
increase or decrease the possibility of
failure with my goal? It's very easy to
answer that question. It's yes or no.
It's increase or decrease. There's no in
between. Do they increase or they
decrease my possibility that I get to my
goal? If the answer is decrease,
then get rid of them. Because imagine
that you have a 100% chance of hitting
your goal and you have three friends
that have a 30% decrease. Like you might
now have a have a [ __ ] you know,
whatever a third times three is,
whatever. You have 27% chance of hitting
your goal now because you have three
terrible friends.
>> Like negative experience.
>> Yeah. Yeah. They're they're they're it's
like getting in video games. It's like
you've got somebody who's casting like a
slow spell on you and you're like moving
so slow and you're like weak and like
all your all your hits have like half
power. Like
a lot of people need to shed
friendships, but the thing is it's more
that they call them friends, but they're
not really friends. They're just there.
And they're there because they've always
been there, but not because they should
be there, but because they're going to
help you get to where you want to go.
They just they're just there. They
exist. They're not going anywhere. They
don't have goals and they're at a
different part in their journey. There's
nothing wrong with that. But if you're
going to start the path of of of
drinking glass and starting to to to
double time, you got to live your life
and you got to live tomorrow's life and
the next day's life and start dragging
that towards you, they're going to
they're going to be upset about it. And
so one of the sayings I recently have
that I like a lot which is there are no
social obligations only social
consequences.
And the people who want to deliver those
consequences often do it by talking to
you less and by avoiding you more. They
try to spend less time with you and talk
to you less to punish you for the fact
that you missed the party. You missed
the going out. You didn't show up to
their wedding. You didn't show up to
their dogs christening or whatever.
But the crazy thing is is that if you
felt obligated to go, then it means you
didn't want to go. And if it mean that
means that if you didn't want to go and
the punishment of not going is that you
don't have to go more in the future
because they avoid you. They don't
invite you anymore. Then to me that's a
win-win. You save time today and you
save time tomorrow. And I don't
understand why people are not willing to
deal with that. Like just looking at
what happens rather than whatever
emotional noise they make with their
face at you like moving past that.
Great. You expelled air at me.
Understood. Got it. But the outcome is
you will no longer invite me, which is
what I want. Great. I feel like we won
here. And so thinking second and third
order outcomes from what happens when I
quote break up with this friend or what
happens when I offend this friend. A lot
of times it's you closer to your goal.
And I've always been okay with that. And
like if someone if someone like
the moment I have seen somebody as
decreasing the likelihood to hit my
goal, I am happy to tell them that like
I think I think you are not good for me.
I don't think you help me hit what I
want to hit. And they be like, well then
they'll try and downgrade your goals and
say you shouldn't believe this way. And
then they'll cast their beliefs on you.
And for me it's like that's amazing that
you believe that. I don't believe that
and I don't really want to believe what
you believe because then I would have
your life and I certainly don't want
that. And so like again I I you I make
these tweets about this but it's like if
you don't like their life don't listen
to what they say. Like don't take their
advice if you don't like what you see.
And so if everyone around you has a life
you don't want then don't listen to any
of their advice. Like, and hopefully
you're listening to this and you're
watching. If there's some element of my
life or whatever that you find awesome,
cool. Then maybe some element of what I
can share is helpful for you. Um, but
you have to put blinders on because
there is a period of time where you, and
I mean, I've said this, but you you're
not going to be successful enough for
the next tier of friends, but you're too
different from the friends that you used
to have. And so, that middle path is
very lonely. But the good thing about
loneliness is you've got time. And right
now, time is what you need because you
got to learn stuff. You got to get the
skills so you can start trading that for
more and more money. And then you can
take the money and trade that for more
money. But in the beginning, you just
have time and that's what you have to
spend. And so if you are broke or you
are poor and wish to no longer be broken
poor,
the first is owning the fact that
everything that has to do with your life
is your fault.
And a lot of people will reject that.
And you're right. Stay poor. You're
totally right. You'll never be
successful. You're totally right. I
believe you.
The next step is being willing to use
what you have rather than what you think
you should have or what you wish you
had. The circumstances, the connections,
the money, whatever, the passion, the
purpose, the meaning behind the work.
You can wish for all that stuff, but you
don't have it. So, you have to use what
you have, which could be anger, could be
shame, could be pain, whatever.
And then
as soon as you start taking action,
everyone around you will collapse and
try to pull you down. And so the only
way to protect yourself against that is
to increase
your own approval of self and decrease
how much their opinion of you matters.
Which means that you have to be you have
to be proud of you for taking the step
and actively look at their lives and
think do I want what they have? If the
answer is no, then do not listen to what
they say.
And then when you do that, you keep
walking. You keep taking steps
no matter how painful it is. And you
never stop.
And if you do that, you will get there.
That's it. Cool.
>> In your 20s, you don't need to find
yourself. You need to build yourself.
Here are 18 tactical lessons I learned
about achieving early success.
>> I made my first million at 26. I crossed
100 million in net worth at age 31. And
this is my road map for things that I
learned along the way. I'd like to
normalize a 6 day a week, 12-hour per
day work week for men between 16 and 28.
And despite all the self-worth voodoo
that social media and society will tell
you, you are valued based on your
utility. And when you're young, you have
none. But you have a lot of energy. And
so trade that energy for experience
points and become useful. The first rule
of entrepreneurship according to Alex is
use what you've got. And the reason I
like that is because many people always
don't start things because they don't
have the capital. They don't have the
connections. They don't have the
whatever insert insecurity or projection
of blame and power they want to put on.
But the first rule is you use what you
have. And so it's about resourcefulness,
not resources. And so if you have
energy, you use the resource you have.
You use what you've got to trade to
develop experience, to develop proof
that you can get good at a skill. And
you only get good at the skill by not
being good at a skill and repeating it
and then failing at each time and then
making incremental improvements which
take many many repetitions until you
actually get good. And this may be a
little controversial, but I'm not here
to be nice to you. I'm trying to be
kind, which might mean that it hurts a
little bit. So, let's make this
practical. If you have less than
$100,000 in savings and you would like
to have $100,000 or more in savings,
these are the things that I would
recommend doing. And that means that you
have to check out your ego. It's your
ego is gone for this. All right? You
don't care what other people think
because they're not going to be there in
10 years. All right? Because you have a
whole new group of friends that are way
[ __ ] better and cooler. So, one, stop
eating out. Discount groceries only.
That's if you're super poor. If here's
my caveat, if you know how to make
money, you already have a base level of
skills, then eating Chipotle and
whatever, whatever you can Door Dash it
in so that you can keep working. The
moment I realized I can make $500 every
30 minutes by selling, I was like, "Oh,
I'm never buying I'm never cooking food
or grocery shopping ever again."
Anything that was less than $500 an hour
was was now immediately outsourced. All
right? But this advice is for people who
are super broke. Okay? So, if you don't
have the skill set yet at all and you're
struggling to just get things going,
then you need to be completely on the
defensive so that you can have enough
money so that you can start taking bets.
Because the only way that you're going
to get ahead is that you have to make
bets. You got to make bets on education.
You got to make bets on opportunities.
You got to make bets on inventory. You
got to make make bets on software. or
you want to start a Shopify store, you
want to start a school community, you
want to start something, it's still
going to cost some money, right? You
might have to buy a camera, you have to
buy some software that helps you edit
videos, like there's some expenses. All
right? And so having a big stockpile
allows you to be patient. The the more
money you have, the longer you out you
can think because you don't have to
worry about tomorrow. You know that next
month and the month after and the month
after taking care of because even if you
made no money, you've got enough. That's
how you can start thinking long term.
People are like, "Think think long term.
Think long term." But like unless if you
have payroll and you've got or you've
got rent or you've got you've got
groceries to pay, you can't think long
term because you're in survival mode.
And so I'm trying to get survival to be
as low as humanly possible for you so
that you could get into thrive mode. But
it's all relative. If you make 40 grand
a month and spend 40 grand a month,
you're going to be in the same survival
mode. But if you make 40 grand a month
and spend four, you're going to have
you're going to have every month you
make 10 months worth of income. And so
in two months, you've got you've got 20
months saved up. You're good. And then
you can get super aggressive with that
other 36 and start really betting to to
double down. All right, so here's the
very broke five, six things that you can
do to immediately spend way less. One,
stop eating out. Discount groceries
only. Two, stop buying new clothes. Go
to Goodwill only. Three, only attend
free friend events. All right, so think
of what I just said. Think about all the
events that friends will tell you to
come to. weddings, bachelor parties, uh
birthdays, um just nights out because
it's Thursday, whatever. Only attend
free friend events. And if they don't
support your goals, they are not your
friends. Think about that. If I said,
"Hey, I've got this goal." And I said,
"Hey, there's this human being and he
wants to get you to not have that goal.
Would you describe them as a friend or
an enemy?"
Think about it. Some of you, some of the
people in your life that you call
friends are actually your enemies. You
just don't know it.
Now, four, take the rest of the time
that you have to A, apply to jobs that
make more than your current job. B, pick
up side hustle work. C, learn skills
that you can trade for a higher hourly
rate than you currently do.
When I say trade, I mean you make more
per hour than what your current current
skills pay you. All right? And then
five, find the hardest worker in the
room when you enter that new job or that
new place and then double their level of
input. So if they knock on a 100 doors,
you knock on 200. They make a 100 dials,
you make 200 dials, right? When I had
Jacob, my young neighbor, I gave him
this exact advice. And he was expected
to on his team do a $100 a day. He did
between 300 and 400. And so guess what?
He got better faster. And then once you
follow all of those steps, this is what
you need to do next. Wait 36 months. And
this is what I mean by patient with your
outputs, impatient with your inputs. And
the crazy thing is that you can change
your life in one decision. I can get
drunk, drive in a car, and change my
life forever. Right? I can happen like
that. But it can happen just like that
the other way. It's just that the
outcome's delayed. That's the only
difference. You can change your life
today in this moment by making these
decisions and the and your life path
will have veered. You will have changed
direction. Your tree of of life will
move. It's just that it takes time for
that new direction to bear fruit.
Whereas you can poison the fruit in a
second. You can kill a tree real fast.
You just can't grow one real fast. But
it doesn't mean that if a seed's planted
and you're watering it, it's not
growing. It just takes a second to get
above the surface. I think you can solve
a lot of male problems by getting in
shape and making money. You'll still
have problems. They'll just be smaller
and you'll have more resources to handle
them. So, let's talk about the making
money part first.
Fundamentally, in order to make money,
you have to provide value to some
someone, either an employer or
customers. But either way, you have
utility which you exchange for money.
And so by making that a goal, then it
means that you're going to increase your
own usefulness. And so somebody who is
more useful all of a sudden develops
other ancillary skills around that
utility that they can use in other parts
of their lives. If you're good at sales,
guess what you can do when you're
talking to girls? You can use the same
conversational skill set. If you're
trying to negotiate uh a purchase for a
car or a house or whatever, like those
skills generalize. They transfer across
domains. And so a lot of people think
it's like, well, when would I ever be a
salesperson or when would I ever be a
outbound what like it doesn't matter.
It's not about that thing. The thing is
it's like real life skills actually do
generalize. Like this isn't elementary
school or or middle school when you're
learning calculus or algebra or whatever
and thinking like what am I going to use
this in real life? One, it is real life
right now. Two,
these skills do get used across domains.
Of all of my friends who are sent to
millionaires and billionaires to a
person, they started in what I would
consider a high volume sales
environment. So that's either
door-nocking, cold calling, or some sort
of in-person business where they had
many, many, many conversations with
strangers on a daily basis. And I think
there, and I'm talking not like a a a
month or six months. I'm talking like
three, five years where no one knew
their name. They were just some faceless
representative that stood there at the
door, saw people, sold memberships, sold
insurance, sold solar, sold whatever.
And the thing is is like skill
development happens through volume and
feedback loops. So it's the number of
repetitions you have times the amount of
improvement between repetitions. Brute
forcing the amount of volume definitely
will help if you can give yourself
feedback. I've seen people say, "Hey,
I've actually made a hundred pieces of
content." Now, this is like 1% of people
because most people do nothing. But of
the 1% of people who say, "Okay, I post
it every day for a year." The thing is
is they didn't do the most important
part, which is you don't just like make
a video and post it and just every day
like, "Hey, make a video, post it, make
a video, post it." You have to look at
what you did and what you could do
better. Fundamentally, that is the the
cornerstone of feedback. And so you look
at the top 10 videos you made over the
last month and you say, "Okay, how do I
do more of that and how do I do less of
the bottom 10%." And you just pick one
thing that you did well there and you
try and do it in every video going
forward. And that develops a checklist
of things to do so that you develop a
skill. And so speaking from my own
experience, the first sales conversation
I ever had, first off, I had zero sales
training. No one was like, "Hey, this is
the script. This is how you go over."
They're like, "Hey, here's a new lady.
Go sign her up." And so I was like,
"Okay." And I didn't even know this was
a sale. I didn't know the I didn't know
the term sales. I just he said, "Go sign
her up." And I said, "Okay." And so I
walked over and I and she was like,
"Hey, you know, I want to know more
about the gym." And I said, "Well, what
do you want to know?"
And she was like, "Well, I mean, like,
how much is it?" And I was like, "Oh,
it's uh whatever, 150 bucks a month."
And she was like, "Okay." And I was
like, "You want to sign up?" And she
said, "I left my credit card at home."
And I was like, "Okay." And she was
like, "I'll be back with the credit
card." And I was like, "Cool." And so I
walked out and uh it was like 2 minutes,
right? And I walked out and the owner
Sam was there with a few of other other
gym owners. He had bought a few gym
owners in. So it was like three or four
gym owners there. And uh he was like,
"Damn." He was like, "That was fast."
And I was like, "Yeah." And he's like,
"You closed her?" And I was like,
"Yeah." And and he was like, "With a
credit card?" And I was like, "Oh, no.
She's she's going to go get it and
she'll be back." And they just looked at
each other and then looked back at me
and then just started laughing at me
uncontrollably, like couldn't breathe at
how dumb what I had just said was. And
the thing is is I had no experience. And
I and I tell that story because so many
people assume that like I walked out of
the womb closing deals, you know what I
mean? Like, hey nurse, what are you
doing later? You know what I mean? Like,
but it wasn't like that, right? Like I
didn't know I I didn't I didn't even
know the term. And so, you know, over
time, I just started developing like,
okay, well, what do you do? And I
watched other people. So, I was like,
okay, they start with asking them why
someone's there. Ask them about their
goals, ask them things that they've done
in the past that didn't work. I like,
okay, that that that seems to work.
Okay. And then when they ask them to
buy, then if they don't want to say yes,
they ask them more questions rather than
just saying, okay. So, I started to
develop at least an understanding of the
framework of how sales occurred. But I
still wasn't good, right? And so then I
went through like that rocky cut scene
period where this is where I'm very
grateful for this is that uh Facebook
ads is when I started running them in
2013 were super cheap. And so it
actually gave me so many repetitions cuz
not only was I taking 15 to 20 consults
a day in person, I was also working
leads. And so I'm talking to strangers
over the phone to set the appointments.
And so all I got was just names on a
list and I would call them set the
appointment like who's this again? You
know, all of that. Um, and then, and by
the way, if you are local, um, you just
say the name pause with a question mark
at the beginning. You're like, "John."
And then they'll be like, "Yeah." You're
like, "This is Alex." I'd pause and
they'd be like, they're like, "Who the
[ __ ] is Alex?" I'd be like, "From
Facebook. You signed up for blah blah
blah blah blah our thing." Yeah. I'm
just calling to make sure that you're
not a crazy person from the internet.
And neither am I. I was like, "We're
actually on the corner of X and Y." I
was like, "Right next to the 7-Eleven."
They're like, "Yeah." I'm like, "Okay,
cool. I just wanted to see what time you
want to come come by. I was like, we
have the sweetest facility in the world.
Not really, but it's uh at least pretty
decent for this area, but we have five
out of five coolness. And they were just
laughing. They be like, I can make it at
six. And I'm like, six works. I was
like, do you want a picture of me or
just of the address? And they're like,
just the address? I'm like, all right,
sounds good. I'll text it to you and
I'll see you later today. Right. So that
kind like notice the like half giggles
between each word. like it's it's
showing that you're a positive tone
person, high energy, and someone's like,
"Man, this guy seems cool or this gal
seems cool, right?" And so they're more
likely to show up. They're more likely
now if I maintain that tone. If they
give me an objection, I can pivot really
easily. If I'm like neutral or like,
"Hi, I saw that you signed up on the
internet for our thing. Uh, would you
like to come in?" They're like, "Uh,
well, tell me more about it." Like,
well, it's just you have no you have no
room for messing up. And so I always
tried to have more rapport and bring a
lot of energy. And the thing is is like
if you've seen any of my content, I'm
not naturally like a high energy person.
Um I will continue to work, which is
different than being like up here. And
so I developed a lot of things to try
and keep myself energized. And so I had
a small trampoline that I would bounce
on uh before and between every sales
appointment. It sounds ridiculous, but
if you I'm telling it's it's like a
hundred bucks if you buy one of those
little trampolines and you bounce either
between sales calls or between people
like I'd have people coming in as I was
still bouncing and I'd be like I know
this is ridiculous. I was like but try
and be in a bad mood on a trampoline.
You can't do it. You can't do it. You
can't do it. And I challenge you too.
You can be in a bad mood if you try
jumping around like you feel like such a
child. It's ridiculous. But what would
happen is like I would rel I would also
get a little bit exercise. My blood
would keep moving. But it's also just
like mentally um literally bouncing
gave me a lot of energy for these
appointments. And so I say this because
I developed all of these things over
time. And so if you're starting out,
you're not going to be good. That's why
you're new. You have no experience. But
there's a difference between there's a
story that um shoot I can't remember
where it is, but there was a foreign kid
who had never seen a banana before. And
so the adult gave the kid a banana and
so the banana so the kid took the banana
and then bit right into it with the skin
and everything and another child was
like you're such an idiot and then the
adult yelled at that child and said no
he just doesn't know any better and
there's a very big difference between
being dumb and being inexperienced right
now you just don't have reps and so
you're going to make a lot of mistakes
like biting into the banana like at for
just walking letting someone walk away
assuming it's a close and they say that
they're just going to come back and call
you with their credit card, right? By
the way, that never happens. Um, very
rarely, but instead, uh, you want to
just peel that banana. You want to bite
into the banana, bite into the orange,
all of those mistakes as quickly as
possible and not judge yourself for
making the mistake and see the mistake
as part of the process of being like
that didn't work, that didn't work. And
if I develop enough of these doesn't
works, then you just kind of walk the
the minefield and you get to where
you're trying to go and people are like,
"Wow, you're so good at this." And
you're like, "Oh, no, no, I actually
just know all the things not to say in a
sale." And then they end up buying. I
just avoid all that and then they buy.
And to be clear, I think I have a
similar piece of advice, but for very
different reasons of telling young men
in general or men to work harder. And
it's not because I think it's some sort
of, you know, beating your chest, I'm an
alpha, whatever thing. It's just that
for me, the point of my life is to
become the best version of me. And in
order to do that, I need to learn
because there's a huge discrepancy
between where I am and where I want to
go. And the discrepancy is going to get
filled with skills, which means that I
need to do repetitions to acquire
failures that I can learn from, to get
better from. And if I can do more of
that in a shorter period of time, I will
learn more skills and by definition, I
will shrink the distance between myself
and my ideal self. And so that is pretty
much the only thought process I have
around this. And I also believe that you
need to be patient with outputs and
impatient with inputs. So let me unpack
that. Patience in general is figuring
out what to do in the meantime. So when
someone says, "Hey, be patient," what
they just mean is figure out something
else to do in the meantime. And so if
I'm telling you to be patient with
outputs, it means that you basically
just have to figure out something else
to do in the meantime while you wait for
outputs to occur because you can't
output. You can't money doesn't appear.
You have to do something and then money
happens, right? But the doing something
part is the thing that you can control.
The money happening is the part that you
don't control that comes afterwards.
It's an outcome, right? And so when I
say patient with outputs, that's the
first part. The second part is impatient
with inputs. And so if being patient is
figuring out what to do in the meantime,
impatience is doing the thing in the
meantime, right? And so it's the
opposite of that. It's the thing you do
in the meantime. And so if you want to
be impatient with the input, the input
is the thing. That's the action you do.
And so by delineating that, if you hear
yourself thinking, man, why hasn't this
happened yet? You're talking about
outputs. And that means great, if I
think that thought, I need to do more of
this input, right? And so use your
input, your action, your doingness, the
thing you use your hands for as your
coping mechanism for your impatience
with outputs. I want to say that one
more time. Whenever you have that
feeling that things should be happening
faster, use action as your coping
mechanism. I used to write this down a
lot uh and say it, which was action
alleviates anxiety. And so when I would
have this anxiety about the future of
like why haven't I made it yet? Why are
these other people doing better than me?
Like is is this not going to work? What
if I'm on the wrong path? Action
alleviates anxiety. The only thing I
could control with that I was is that I
would work is that I would get better.
And the key point there was that it
wasn't just working for work's sake. It
was working with the intention to
improve. And so you want to do
repetitions because by doing things more
times you get better at them typically
just by accident. But if you're
deliberate about the point of doing
this, when I started working at a gym,
going from a white collar job, it wasn't
because I wanted to become a trainer for
the rest of my life. It was because I
wanted to learn the skills.
And then I knew that once I learned
those skills, if I owned a gym, then I
would know how to do the training part
as well. And that would be good for me.
And so then when I was a gym owner and
when I started and started working at a
gym, I wanted to own a big chain of
gyms. That was my that was my whole goal
to start with. I wasn't getting into
this for one. Like I never had the goal
of only owning just one gym. And so even
when I started that gym, the whole point
and I worked all the time because I
thought of all the things that I didn't
know how to do yet. And so it wasn't
about great, I've made it. I own a gym.
It was like I'm so deprived of where I
want to be. I have I have to fill this
gap as fast as I possibly can. And so
that's why I spent so much time on this
and got feedback from as many human
beings as I possibly could who were
ahead of me. So, I want to say this
clearly. Once I started my gym one, I
paid for a mastermind for gym owners
before owning a gym. And I did that
because I figured, well, why would I
start a gym until I learn all the stuff
that you guys did wrong? I was like,
I'll just learn from all y'all's
mistakes. It sounds like a great deal
for me. It almost felt unfair. I was
like, "Yeah, okay." He said, "Don't
start at one of those locations." He
said, "Have good storefront." He said,
"Make sure that you have, you know, good
parking." I was, "Oo, these are all
good, you know, good things." They're
like, "Don't go too big." I was like,
"Okay, that's good." and they're like,
"Make sure your rent's under this per
foot." I was like, "All right, make sure
I got that right." And so, I took all
these notes in that I would have just
made huge mistakes on the on the
upfront. Now, once I did start my gym,
what a lot of people don't know is that
every weekend I would either be on phone
calls or I'd be driving out to other gym
owners and I would, and thankfully,
because I was so young when I started my
business, they were just like, they felt
bad for me. And so, they would just sit
there and I'd be like, "Hey, why do you
do that? Hey, why do you do that? Hey,
why do you do that?" And it was like,
you know, they'd be like, "God, you're
such a pain in the ass." But I just
wanted to learn, right? But I was always
like willing to help them with anything
they had. You know what I mean? I was
like, "Let me show you the stuff that's
working well for me." And I would always
just share it. Um, and the thing is is I
would go there and they would say they
did something and I'd be like, "Huh,
that's weird. That's different than the
other guy." And I I like that way
better. It didn't mean I'd take
everything as as fact. But I got a lot
of ideas from that. And then I would use
them. And if they didn't work, I would
just toss them out. And if they did, I
kept it. And that's how I quickly
iterated the gym model to become much
better than a lot of people's models
despite me being younger because I was
able to leverage everyone else's
experience as fast as I could and gym it
into my own. And so I think like the
people who move faster than life learn
faster and the only way you learn is by
changing your behavior with the same
conditions. Which means that if a person
walks in I say this is my six-point
script. A person who's identical walks
in right afterwards. If I've learned
something, that script changes means
same condition, new behavior. And so if
you keep doing the exact same thing
every single day, then you may not be
learning. And this is a key point. It's
good to work hard, but it's good to work
hard and smart, which means that the
work you do gets better because you
tweak things. And so if you're not
documenting the process that you have,
and I'm not saying you're making content
about it, but literally looking back at
game footage, looking at the calls you
did, looking at the content you did. I
do this today. People ask me like, "What
are the masterminds you're into? What
are the courses you learn from?" I have
now broken apart the learning process
that I have that works best for me
because I see the biggest gains and
improvement haven't come from advice for
me for the most part. They came from
looking at data, which was, let me look
at the last 2,000 ads I made. Let me
look at the top 50. Let me look at what
these ones have in common. Let me look
at what they don't look like compared to
the bottom 50. Okay, these ones have
these characteristics. These don't. I'll
do more of this and less of that. And
then I do another hundred ads and I look
at the top 10 again. I say, "What do
these ones have that these ones don't?"
And I do that for sales calls. I do that
for content. I do that for meetings. I
do that for for businesses in general
when you start zooming out. And so that
process of do a lot of volume. Then look
at the outcomes that were good. Look at
the activities that led to those
outcomes that are positive. Do more of
those activities. Look at the bottom
percentages. Look at the things that led
to not having that happen. and do less
of those. And if you're younger, and
this is specific for everyone who's
listening to this video, if you're
probably sub 30, sub 28 maybe, right? If
you're in your 20s or less, you can
probably get away with this, which is
that people ahead of you are more
willing, believe it or not, to feel like
they have status. So, you can give them
status by saying, "Be a mentor." And the
thing is, a lot of young guys have a lot
of ego, right? Because you're trying to
prove yourself, trying to be a man,
whatever. The thing is is that if you
humble yourself, it's not like there's
some [ __ ] massive scoreboard where
it's like who humbled themselves to whom
across the whole US. It doesn't it's not
not exists. It's just it's within one
dynamic, right? And so if you go and
say, "Hey, I don't know anything. I'm
happy to learn." If you do that, then a
lot of people are like, "Oh, well, he
humbled himself." Well, yeah, I'm happy
to teach you. And the thing is is
they'll give you advice that's worth
thousands of dollars, years of your life
for free if you just say, "You're better
than I am at this." But the thing is is
at the end of the day none of it matters
but scoreboard would be the thing that
matters in business right and so the
only thing that precedes the scoreboard
is your learning I've spent ego points
I've spent dollars I've spent time I've
spent social capital I spent every
resource that I had to get more learning
faster because fundamentally the only
thing and I think this is probably one
of the biggest gifts my father gave me
is believing that I am the asset I am
investing in. And the cool thing is is
like you are the permanent hold, right?
You can't sell you like you're you until
you die. And so this is the one asset
you've got because you compound. Skills
compound. When you get really good at
sales and really good at finance, guess
what? You can raise a billion dollars
because you know how the finance world
works and you know how the sales world
works, right? If you know how to you
know how to code and market, then guess
what? You can build software and sell it
to gazillions of people because you have
the product and the acquisition. Like
skills stack disproportionately. If you
only know one, you might not be able to
make a tenth as much as if you know two.
Now, obviously those are big bucketed
terms that have many, many, many skills
underneath of them. But fundamentally,
when you think about it that way, you
become a weapon. Real quick, I have a
gift for you. This is the $100 million
scaling road map. It's something that my
team and I put 200 plus hours into
building and breaking the stages of
scaling into 10 steps. All right? All
right. And so what we did is we broke
down everything that got us basically
got us stuck and what we did to break
free at each level of the business. And
if you'd like to know what product,
marketing, sales, customer service, IT,
recruiting, human uh resources, and
finance look like at the stage that
you're currently at, this is a free
gift. So all you have to do is go to
aquis.com/romap. You can plug in your
business information. And if you want
our help, you want my help to help you
break through whatever level of scaling
you're at. This is not a promise. I'm
just saying we'd love to help. Um on the
thank you page, you can book a call. Uh,
every month we have a workshop out here
at my headquarters. You actually talk to
my real team that does does our
marketing, does our emails, does our
ads, does our copy, does our does our
does our sales, does our finance, does
our recruiting, the real people are
doing this at a very high level. And
what's really cool about that is that
they can typically find and spot what
the constraints are in a business like
that. And so it's one of the most
valuable things that I could possibly
do. Obviously, you know, space is
limited based on our actual
headquarters. Um, but if that's
interesting on the thank you page, you
can book a call. No pressure. This is a
gift either way. It's absolutely free.
So, let's tackle the second part. I said
you can solve a lot of male problems by
getting in shape and making money. And
so let's talk about the getting in shape
side. So you can avoid tons of problems
in life by doing one thing, going to bed
on time. And so instead of setting
alarms to wake up, set alarms to go to
sleep on time. It's hard to wake up late
when you go to bed at 9, right? And so
the thing is is that that one simple
behavior actually can eliminate a lot of
the things that derail men, especially
young men. And so Charlie Mer talks
about this a lot, which is like all I'd
want to do is find out where I'm going
to die and never go there. The whole
point is he thought so much more about
avoiding stupidity than trying to be
intelligent. It's kind of like the
stupidities are very easy to identify.
The intelligence is hard, but if you
avoid all stupidity, you just become
intelligent by default. And so if you
define intelligence the way I do, which
is rate of learning, so how quickly you
pick things up, that is intelligence. If
you can avoid all of these things that
make you look like an idiot, right? Then
you become more intelligent. And so
let's let's talk about this from the
from the the getting in shape
perspective. Show me a situation where
you have two groups of men. One group of
men that is really out of shape and fat
and another group of men that's really
in shape that are going to outperform
one another. And this is generalized.
You have to take random sampling of the
population. A bunch of inshaped guys, a
bunch of overweight guys. Who's going to
do better at any task over and over
again? If we pick 10 tasks that are
completely different, the inshaped guys
are going to do better than the out of
shape guys. Period. They're going to
have more energy. They're going to be
more focused. If it's anything
interrelated, like inter relations
based, like those guys are going to
close higher percentages. If you're
better looking, you will close more. If
you're better looking, you get paid
more. If you're better looking, you get
more promoted. If you're better looking,
you do better in content. Period. Fight
me. And so the thing is is like if you
have this one thing that affects every
way that people see you and the only
thing you have to do is control what you
put into your mouth, then don't you
think it's worth developing that most
basic skill of discipline at this point
in your life? Because the thing is is
that you want to get in shape young
because if you're not in shape, guess
whose fault that is?
So get in shape now. Thing is is it
costs time, not money. And right now
you've got time and not money. And time
only becomes more expensive as you age.
So buy it now while time cost you the
least and you have the fewest
responsibilities. It'll help you no
matter what life path you choose. The
thing that no one recognizes is that
drinking cost you two days. The day you
drink and the day you recover. and
sometimes the weeks afterwards for the
stupid thing you did while you were
drunk that everyone else saw. It reminds
me of this quote from Muhammad Ali and I
asked my team to pull it up cuz I think
it's so good also cuz he was the
greatest of all time and just a cool
dude.
>> What's the the central part of your
training? Is it running? Is it sparring
or
>> central part is dodging the nightclubs
and the parties and the girls?
>> You want the truth? and being in the bed
by yourself 9:00 at night.
>> And if you can get by that, you'll make
it.
>> That's the truth. Now, I tell you the
truth. You talk all that running and
hitting the bags and jogging and biting
them. You won't
>> dodging ladies is the main thing.
>> Especially when you're pretty like me.
>> And I'll speak to myself personally.
When I had my intense periods of work, I
would take off for a long, long time. So
the longest I took off was two years
while I was scaling gym launch from, you
know, the 20 months we went from zero to
4 and a.5 million a month, 4.4 to be
technical. I didn't drink that whole
period. And once things settled out, I
was like, "All right, I'm willing to
drink again." And right now,
Acquisition.com is scaling like crazy.
And so Leila and I both said, "Let's
just stop drinking for the foreseeable."
And same thing now. So that was when I
was in my 20s. This is now when I'm in
my 30s. And I'll probably continue this
until I feel like I'm at a place where
things feel chill again. and then like
maybe I'll I'll partake again. But the
thing is is like if you're hungry, argue
me the opposite, which is me drinking
more will make it more likely for me to
hit my goals. I think you'd have a tough
time making that argument. And so right
now everything's compounding is
amplified, right? The stuff you do now
amplifies throughout your career and
your life. And so I would want to stack
as many advantages as I can to my
favorite, which is like I'm going to go
to sleep on time. I'm going to not
drink, right? I'm going to get in shape,
right? I'm going to do as many
repetitions as I can. I'm going to
humble myself with people who are more
experienced than I am. Even if I think
I'm smarter than them, they still know
more. And there's a big difference, and
this is what I think is really tough for
younger guys, is that your brain at 25
to, you know, like 25ish, 25 to 30 is
like peak processing power. But I'm way
[ __ ] smarter now than I was then
because I've still learned more. And
that's the thing is is that you may be
smarter than someone in sheer processing
power, but they still might know more
than you. And so you can't live their
life. And especially if somebody is
further ahead, then they it still means
that they have knowledge that you don't.
And so listen and humbling yourself to
somebody even if you think you are
smarter will teach you more because
again argue the opposite. I will learn
nothing from no one. How does that help
you? It helps you your ego feel good,
but at some point your ego is going to
have to rectify its good feeling with
reality, which is that you're broke as
[ __ ] and no one cares. And so, I would
rather humble myself rather than have
the world humble me. This is a Bible
quote that I just really like a lot.
It's Matthew 23:12. He said, "Those who
are humble will be exalted, and whoever
exalts himself will be humbled." I
actually told that to one of our our
team the other day because I felt like
his ego was getting a little bit bigger
than it probably should have been. And I
said, "Listen, man." I was like, "If you
want to get humbled, keep doing what
you're doing." I was like, "But if you
want people to talk you up," I was like,
"Humble yourself. Let your work work for
you and then everyone else will exalt
you." And so, I think most men want to
be respected. They don't have respect.
And so, they compensate by exalting
themselves because it makes them feel
better in the short term, but you look
like an idiot in the long term. And
think about it like this. Like, for some
reason, I don't know why we're wired
this way, but we say nice things about
ourselves and we feel good, but everyone
else feels bad, right? If everyone else
says nice things about you, it doesn't
make them feel bad to say it, but it
makes you feel good. Think about those
people in your life who always like talk
themselves up. It's like, what do you
see? You're like, "This guy's so
insecure. It's obvious." And you look
that way. You don't feel that way, but
you look that way. And some of the
things that you develop as you get older
is the separation between how I look and
how I feel, which is like, "Oh, even
though this feels good, I look dumb
doing this." Your feelings can lie to
you in terms of how well this behavior
is serving you with your goals in the
long term. And while we're talking about
your friends exalting you and your
friends saying you're cool, how much do
their opinions of you really matter? Cuz
now this is going to take a completely
different direction than you expected,
which is you being humble is a
description that other people would give
to you. But it relies on you caring a
lot of what they think, which is a
double-edged sword. And the younger you
are, actually at all points, it hurts
you. It's kind of like the stock market.
One person, two person. One day or two
days in the stock market, it's just
about sentiment. But how big the stock
goes over a decade is about how good the
intrinsic stock is. And so if a few
people say you're an [ __ ] no big
deal. If everyone says you're an
[ __ ] probably a problem, right? And
so it's understanding the nuance between
that. But your friend group has a
disproportionate sway over your
behavior. And so your reference group is
one of the number one correlations with
how big your life gets or rather the
goals you achieve. Now they've done the
studies in terms of finance because it's
easy to quantify but your reference
group the five people you compare
yourself to not necessarily spend the
most time with but compare yourself to
are the ones that determine your future.
And so sometimes you have to like your
goals more than you like your friends.
And every person who wants to do
something in their life or has done
something with their lives is going
through the exact same chapter that
you're going through right now. And it's
the lonely chapter. It's the chapter
where you don't fit in with your old
friends, but you don't have the
achievements yet to fit in with a new
group of friends. And you're doing all
the stuff, right? The fruit tutorials.
You're watching these videos and you're
reading everything you can get your
hands on. And you're trying to set up
whatever your podcast is or your content
thing, right? And you're going through
it and you're thinking to yourself like,
"Is this even worth it?" because you're
not seeing any signs of success. But the
sign of success is the hate that you get
along the way. It is the leading
indicator. And what you can't do is bend
the knee to their hate and try and fit
back in and conform because it's
comfortable and it's warm. It's like the
scene in the Matrix when Trinity opens
the door, the very beginning in the
first Matrix when Neo is about to take
the red pill and he wants to get out of
the car and Trinity says, "You've been
down that road, Neo. you know that road
and you know exactly where it ends and I
know that's not where you want to be.
And then he closes the door and he gets
back in and he goes they they go to go
take the red pill. So right now this
moment that you're going through is
Trinity opening the door and saying you
could go back. You could go party. You
could go to the nightclubs. You could
say that this was just a hobby. You
could downplay what you're doing like
I'm just trying it out. Oh yeah. I'm not
I'm not really that into it. It's just
like just something I found. Right. But
then as you're saying, you feel like a
fake because you're lying to yourself.
You're lying to them about what you what
your real intentions are. And in that
moment when you're trying to think about
having that conversation, you'll
remember exactly why you left, why it is
that road. And you know exactly where it
ends. And that's not where you want to
be. And the thing is is that your goals
will stick with you longer than these
relationships. Your goals will serve you
more than these relationships. And this
is what this is the stuff that no one
will tell you. I can tell you
personally, I don't talk to I talked to
one friend that I have from middle
school and high school. All right? I
talk to one person, two people from
college. And it's not like we talk all
the time. I talk to him every six months
or so. And so I say this because
although these relationships feel like
they're incredibly important in your
life right now, they will disappear. The
majority of these of these friendships
are based on convenience. you're only
friends with them because they lived in
your dorm, they lived in your
neighborhood, they went in to English
class with you. But as soon as your
conditions change, you change where
you're at. All many of them will fade
away because you'll develop new skills.
You'll develop new context. You'll meet
new people who are upskilled from them.
And then you'll compare them to compare
to these people and you'll be like,
"Man, these are better friends. These
are people who are more aligned with my
goals. They're trying to grow. When I
want to work all day Saturday, they're
like, cool, I'll work with you." Rather
than being like, "Dude, we're going on a
pontoon boat. like where are you going
to be? And you have to accept that as
the price. And the thing is is like it's
only if you want that like if you if you
want to live a life that is the same as
everyone else's then you can do what
everyone else does. The only issue is
when you want to do what everyone else
does but get what none of them have. If
you want to be exceptional by definition
you will be the exception. You will not
be normal. You will be unlike the
others. And so it makes sense that you
would be in the out groupoup. And it
hurts as a human being because you want
to be in the in-group. It's part of our
DNA. Shame is a real thing. And we don't
want to feel that because in in the real
in the in the n natural world, if you're
outside of the group, you have a much
lower likelihood of living and
procreating. So it's strong in our DNA
to be in group. But the thing is is that
you're actually not in group or out of
group. You're transitioning. You're
between groups. And so in that lonely
chapter, that's where you can do a
disproportionate amount of work because
you have no distractions. So you listen
to the podcast, you read the tweets, you
watch the videos, you consume the
content because you know deep down, I
can do more than this. And you begin to
see the person that you could be and
realize how far you need to go to get
there. But despite how far away it
seems, your goals, the best version of
you, you look back down the dead end
road and you know that's not where you
want to be. And so you keep going and
realize that there's no turning back.
Once you see the promised land, once you
see what you could become, you can't go
back. And if you're not sure who your
real friends are, one, ask, is it more
likely or less likely that I hit my
goals with this person in my life? Just
think about it. Like, if this person
isn't in my life, is it more likely my
goals? Then remove them. Because it's
better to have friends who force you to
grow than ones who accept you as you
are. Because the biggest risk to your
future isn't your future competition or
your rivals. It's the distraction that
you insist on keeping in your life
rather than doing the things you know
you should be doing but aren't. Think
about it like this. Imagine a competitor
that you'd never want to go against.
Focused, persistent, always learning,
always improving, relentless, says no to
everything but that which makes them
stronger. You know what he looks like.
You know how he acts. You know who he
associates with. Great.
That's future you. Now become him. You
have to kill your current self for your
new self to have room to grow. And so
it's this constant appraisal of your
skills and activities and saying which
of these makes me stronger? Which of
these makes it more likely for me to hit
my goal? And I just want to give you
that frame because that like that single
frame of is this person being in my life
make it more likely or less likely to
hit my goal? Is this activity or this
behavior that I do make it more or less
likely to hit my goal? And I
consistently just ask that question over
and over and over again. And that is
because for me, I do love my goals more
than I love my friend because my goals
will be with me long after they are. And
so if you think about your relationship
with your goals and you put it on the
same pedestal or higher than your
relationship with your friends, you're
going to lose one of the relationships.
And the question is which one is the one
that's going to serve you more in the
long term? That's a decision for you.
But for me, I can tell you personally,
achieving my goals has served me more
than any one person has. And because
achieving your goals is a generalized
thing, it can open all doors to new
relationships. And so you do have to
burn sometimes what you have in order to
have what you want. If you want to
impress poor people, outspend them. If
you want to impress rich people, outwork
them. And I can tell you this being in
the position that I'm at because I have
tons of young men who work for me and I
mean they hear all the content that I
make and they know that. And so if you
lease a Ferrari for $5,000 a month or
whatever, I know you're not rich. And
every rich person isn't impressed by
that because we know what it costs. You
only impress poor people. And if you do
it really early in your career, every
rich person's like, "Man, you should be
reinvesting that to get way [ __ ]
bigger." Now, if you're like an
afficionado and you want to have lots of
cars, and that's like, again, that's
different. It depends on the reason
you're doing it. It's like you shouldn't
be cooking your own food unless you love
cooking. But if you don't love cooking,
then you should outsource that [ __ ] as
fast as possible so that you can get
your time back. It's understanding the
context of this, which of course this
will be taken out of context. But
hopefully you watching or listening to
this can at least get it. Leila and I
both collectively started buying nicer
things. So living in nicer places,
having nicer cars, I bought my home,
which was a nice house in Austin. I
think it cost me 1.7 million. I bought
it in cash and I bought it off one
month's paycheck. And so I want to put
that in context to like was it a ball
and house? Totally. It was sick. I was
super happy to be there. But where I
lived before that cost me 1,200 bucks a
month. And so you're like, wait, 1.6,
right? We spend money, but by
percentage, the amount of money we spend
is inconsequential. If you want to buy
the toys and you want to buy that stuff,
I would say sure, understand one,
whatever you spend, you're taking away
from the future. Now, there is always a
point you have to balance between
consumption and investment. If you never
spend anything, you live you live your
entire life and you end up with a big
pile of money and you didn't enjoy any
moment of that. I don't think that's the
way to do it. But I do think there's a
ratio there and I think that ratio
depends on you as an individual. I tend
to always overindex on investment
because I just I want to become a really
like great version of me and I think
that's going to cost money and it's
going to cost time and I like to be
ready for those opportunities because
the opportunities get bigger and have
more zeros next to them and there's no
masterminds you get to at a certain
level. you just do a deal with someone
and if for me to pony up for the deal
might be like, "Hey, you got to write a
check for 10 million." I'm like, "All
right, I got to have that ready for just
like on the sidelines waiting for
opportunities, right?" And so the idea
is being on the defensive so that you
can be on the offensive. It's living far
below your lifestyle so that you can
more heavily invest in the growth of the
business. And so your lifestyle is your
competitor's opportunity. There's you
and other version of you. There's
bizarro you, right? And Bizaru wants to
live this great lifestyle and has the
Ferrari and the nicer place and
whatever. But when an opportunity comes
along, Bizarro doesn't have any savings
because he's trying to to show face,
right? But the thing is is that
everybody who's trying to show face for
hates him anyways cuz it looks like he's
bragging. But also, they know how much
he makes relatively and they're like,
"God, he's got to be spending his whole
paycheck. He looks irresponsible."
There's zero advantage to being
accurately judged. If you are strong,
you want to appear weak. You want to
have more money than people expect you
to have. And so for me, when we did buy
the Bentley, which I bought because I
got, I'll be honest, I got pressured
into it. They're like, "Dude, come on.
You make all this money. Like, buy
something nice for yourself." And I was
like, "I guess people buy nice cars."
So, I bought a car. I bought a Bentley.
And um I returned it 6 months later. Uh
and I lost 20 grand on it. And I was
like, "This was just a complete waste of
everything." Like, I just don't care at
all about this because you only need
three things to win. You can write this
down. the balls to start, the brains to
learn, and the heart to never quit. And
the good news is you already have all
three. You're just not using them.
Because fundamentally, if you found
somebody and they started and they
continued to get better and they never
stopped, they would win. Just think
about it from fundamental basics. Like
if I said, okay, think of a person who
only did one thing and all they
dedicated their entire life to is doing
that one thing and getting better and
better at that thing and they did it for
50 years. Do you think that person would
not be incredibly successful? Of course
they would be. then why aren't you doing
it? The problem is it's never been
easier to start a business. It's also
never been easier to do nothing at all.
And this is what I mean by your
distractions are the things that are
getting in your way, preventing you from
doing the things you already know you
should be doing but aren't. Right now,
if I were to say, "Hey, go get in shape.
What do you need to do?" What you want
to say is, "I'm going to go do some
research to find the best program and to
find the best diet." But if I just said,
"No, no, no. You can't look." Make a
guess. What would you say? You're
probably like, "Well, I need probably
like go to the gym, probably do some
weights, probably do some cardio, move a
little bit." Or would I say, "Do you
want to stay at the same weight? Do you
want to stay at the same cardio pace or
do you want to move those up over time?"
You probably say, "I want to move those
up over time." Like, okay. And then
food-wise, like, do you want to probably
eat more protein and eat like [ __ ] You
probably be like, "Yeah." Like, well,
why don't we just start there? Most of
the things you need to do, you already
know what to do, and you delay doing
them by under the guise of having a
better plan. But the reality is that
your plan is always going to change as
soon as you get new information. And so
the point is to start period and learn.
And it's giving yourself permission to
have the humility to start a role that
you know is not going to be your endgame
because you just see it as one tile on
the painting that's going to become the
version of you that you want. It's like
I got to start at this corner. I'm going
to paint this corner up because I know
that this cornerstone of experience in
doortodoor or cold calling or media
buying, whatever, is going to be
something that I can build my whole
career off of. There are maybe trillions
of dollars, but at least hundreds of
billions of dollars that are being made
and dedicated every day to getting you
to do nothing. It's not a fair fight. I
want to be clear. It's not a fair fight.
And they're winning. And so, I love this
from from Andy Fcell. said personal
excellence is the ultimate rebellion.
And so I think like you want to be a
[ __ ] rebel, be excellent and do it
for you. Like you want to stick it to
the man now, just be great.
Fundamentally, the point of
entertainment is to get someone to pay
attention to it. That's all
entertainment does is pay attention to
me, right? And so that means that you're
not paying attention to the thing that
matters more to you in the long term.
And so every dollar, every minute of
attention you pay to entertainment,
whether that's porn, alcohol, going out
to clubs, uh, all of social media in
general, motivation, porn, if you will,
all of that is you not doing what you
need to do to get to where you want to
go. You just have to be able to do
things without seeing an immediate
reward. Like, if there's one meta skill
that that overshadows all of this, it's
your ability to delay gratification. Is
to delay a moment of reward. That's it.
Like that's all you have to do. And in
the beginning, you just have to be able
to do it long enough that you get one
reward. And that reward is typically
outsized in its strength. And then that
will reinforce you sticking with it.
Because the people who do work really
really hard, it's not like they're made
of different flesh and blood than you.
It just means that they had a short
period at some point where they said,
"I'm going to shut everything else off
and I'm going to go all in on this." And
then when they do get that first
feedback loop like, "Holy [ __ ] I made
my first sale. Holy [ __ ] I I got my
first lead from from ads. Holy [ __ ] I
got my first, you know, 100 followers."
Whatever. It doesn't matter. like you
have some feedback loop for whatever it
is that you're trying to go after that
then encourages you to do more and
you're like, "Oh, this could work." And
then as soon as that turns on, you can
get obsessed with it. If I had you sign
a contract right now to be that you the
guaranteed that you'd be a millionaire
in 10 years, but you couldn't make any
real money between now and then, would
you sign it? Every person I've asked
says yes. And so maybe if you are
listening to this and you're nodding
your head like, "Okay, if I'm 30, I'm a
millionaire." Yeah, it sounds like a
great deal. By the way, that's like 0
whatever 1%. Like no one is. But if
that's you, a lot of stuff takes much
longer. And the problem is that when
you're 20, you've only been an adult for
like 3 seconds. And so the thing is that
3 seconds feels like a very long time.
But I have this belief that older people
are more patient, not because they're
actually more patient. It's just because
your perception of time speeds up. I can
be more patient than a 5-year-old
because for me, one year is not 20% of
my life. So my perception of time
shrinks. I might have the same patience
as a 5-year-old. It's just that more
time passes. And so, if you are younger,
then you have to just understand that
your perception of time will speed up.
And so, you will be able to exhibit
patience. You'll keep being able to do
something else in the meantime because
the meantime will pass faster. And so,
you have to overindex on it when you're
starting. I mean, I've got guys on my
team who are like, "Hey, what's my next
career move?" And they're like 30 days
into their job. And I'm like,
"Give it a second." like you still suck.
>> Like you went from suck to proficient,
like you're not great yet. Calm down.
The real world is very different from
school, which you've already, if you're
watching my stuff, you already kind of
have an idea about that. But I want to
give you the more of the behavioral
definition around it is that with
school, you have very clear directions
and a clear outcome with a clear
timeline and you get a grade
immediately. So that's kind of like the
reward or feedback loop, right? And
sometimes it's pop quiz, same day, next
day, you get the the feedback loop. Or
even you get you finish the quiz, you go
outside and you're like, "Hey, would you
answer for six?" And you're like, "Ah,
[ __ ] I got it wrong." Or whatever,
right? But the thing is is the world is
completely opposite of that. And so the
re the thing is that beginners are
paralyzed to make a decision because
they assume the real world works like
school and only has one right answer.
But reality is is that there are many
right answers with only one wrong answer
which is doing nothing. And that's the
answer that most people pick. So I was
talking to Neil Patel who's a friend of
mine and he just made this uh this big
tweet about this but he and I had had a
conversation about it earlier. He has
two friends. One who's a public uh CEO,
found a company, took it public. He's
got another friend who found a company,
took it public, took it back private,
and then now only does private deals.
The guy who does public and made all his
money public is like, you got to go
public. And the other guy who took his
company public and it was a big mess and
then took it private again is actually
richer than the guy who made his company
public. Both those guys are billionaires
and both gave advice and they had
differing advice. And so I don't see it
as one is right or wrong. It's that
there are many right paths, but only one
thing will prevent you from achieving
all of it, which is the only thing I'm
trying to conquer in this video is
getting you to not do the one wrong
path, which is fear. Fear of not making
it work. Fear of of other people's
disapproval who don't matter anyways.
That you aren't cool anymore or because
you don't show up to social events or
because you don't blow money on stuff
that doesn't matter anymore or you're
not wearing the brands that they think
are cool. Is all of that worth you for
the rest of your life having the
crushing feeling of mediocrity knowing
you could do more? And I say, and I can
describe this because I've lived it.
It's why I say it. I'm not saying that
that stuff's not going to happen. It
absolutely will happen. And it might
even be worse than you imagine. But you
will not die. And if you use the frame,
does me losing all of these
relationships and having more time
increase the likelihood that I get to my
goal or decrease the likelihood that I
get to my goal?
All of a sudden, when you use the goal
frame of the best version of you, all of
a sudden it starts to it starts to make
things a lot clearer. It's like, no, me
going to this bachelorette party does
not increase the likelihood to hit my
goals.
And I'm not saying that you have to to
make that sacrifice every time, but the
thing is is you're making a sacrifice
either way. You're either sacrificing
your goals or you're sacrificing that
relationship. And so some of you guys
are like, "Oh, Alex, that sounds
unbalanced." I'm going to get a couple,
you know, comments from uh the [ __ ]
online therapists of like, I think
emotional well-being and mental health
is super important. Well, first off, the
pendulum swinging back. No one gives a
[ __ ] about the soft stuff anymore. Thank
[ __ ] God. But at some point everyone
who wants to achieve great things
realizes that balance is a myth. And
once they realize that they become
someone who achieves great things. At
some point every person who wants to
achieve great things realizes that
balance is a myth. And once they realize
that they become someone who achieves
great things. And so there's this whole
misnomer this whole idea. Think about
what mediocrity is. It's about being in
the middle. It's the medium. That's
being right in the middle, right?
Balance.
But anybody who is imbalanced is another
way of saying more focused on the one
thing will be better at that thing than
you. And the question is just whether or
not that thing that they choose to be
better at will give them more leverage
over all that other stuff later.
And so if you work very hard and you
create something that's very valuable
for society, I promise you, you will be
able to find a hotter wife. I promise
you, you will have the money that you
want. I promise you, you can buy the
time that you want to have. You'll have
all of that at your disposal. But if you
choose the balanced life, there's
nothing wrong with that. I just see that
there's balance over a lifetime rather
than balance at every moment of life.
And so, you might have seasons like I
took basically a year off during the
last year of gym launch. I just didn't
really do a lot. So, I had more time
than anybody and money, right? But I had
seasons before that where I didn't take
any time off. And so I think if you
expand your time horizon for what
balance really means that this is a
softer way of explaining it. Uh then I
think that that will you know make you
sleep well at night. But real talk I
work all the time because I like to do
it. And I think that once you get a fast
feedback loop with the work that you
like that also propels your goals then
you're not going to want to do anything
else. And that's it's not like I or some
of the people that all right it's not
like the people that you look up to have
some sort of herculean work ethic or
discipline that you don't. They like
things that happen to also bring them
status. And that means that they went
through a small period where they
started doing that thing when they
weren't good at it and it didn't bring
them status, but they were able to make
it through that bridge until eventually
did start working and did bring them
status and then they just kept going. So
you just need enough gusto to start and
just get through that period to just get
through your friends saying you suck for
a little bit. And everything you start
will not be fun because you'll suck. But
getting good is fun. Getting better is
fun. And so I get excited a lot of times
when I see how bad I am at something
that's new because I have enough
generalized reinforcement for learning
how to get better at things that you
learn the skill of getting better. Like
that's a meta skill. You learn how to
learn. And so just see it as an
opportunity to learn how to do anything
better. So if you have a first thing,
then that's the first thing that you get
better at. And then you'll learn the
skill of getting better and you can
apply it all over the place. So, if
you're a business owner and you'd like
to scale, I'd like to invite you out to
my headquarters for one of our scaling
workshops where we help identify and
solve your number one constraint so you
can start the year with lots of
momentum. And so, if that sounds at all
interesting, click the link below, book
a call with my team, and if you're a
fit, we'd love to see out of it. Some of
you guys are listening to this and
you're like, "Okay, you know, this is
great. I'm feeling awesome." The thing
is is that people, maybe it's you, are
waiting for this perfect moment, but it
doesn't come right. It happens the
moment you decide that you're fed up
with waiting and decide to take action.
And it only becomes the perfect moment
when you look back on it because today
it just looks like now. I had a
conversation with a young man yesterday
who said, "Listen, I have demons."
And I was like, "Bro, you don't have
[ __ ] demons." I was like, "Shut up."
And he was like, I was like, "The thing
is And I I was so visceral with my
reaction because I used to say that kind
of stuff because I thought it made me
hard. I thought it made me complex. I
thought it made mysterious. But it's you
don't have demons. You're not
self-sabotaging. You don't have mom or
dad issues. What you have is a lack of
skills in how to behave in a certain
condition. So when you say you have
demons, what it really means if I say,
okay, what do you mean by that? Define
that. How do what is define having
demons? Right? What I don't most people
say that they don't mean they actually
think they have spiritual demons inside
of them. I'm not even going to touch
that. What they really mean is that
under these conditions I behave a way
that is not ideal. And so what that
means is you have a skill deficiency. No
[ __ ] You're inexperienced. Of course
you have a skill deficiency. You don't
have demons. You don't know how to be
consistent.
You're not you don't have I I just can't
stay with anybody for a long time. No.
It either means you have really high
standards, which is fine, and you
haven't met that person yet, or you just
don't know how to behave consistently.
It's like when I have a sales guy who's
like, "Hey, you know, I'm 30 days into
this role and I'm getting I'm getting
kind of bored taking sales calls." I'm
like, "Oh, your ability to not be able
to continue after something gets boring
and learn to love the incremental
improvements, the hundred or thousand
repetitions is the skill discrepancy
that you need to overcome. The best
salespeople,
bad salespeople try and have a couple
good days. Good salespeople get on hot
streaks. Great salespeople never get
cold. And so that takes discipline to
understand how to consistently get
yourself hot, how to consistently treat
every sale the same way you do when
you're on fire. Because there is no
being on fire. It means you simply
behave differently. It's not like you
have magic. You you pause differently.
You take longer spaces, you ask the
question, your tonality shifts. And
those are skills because you can learn
them. And so this whole thing of like,
this is this young man, I'm traumatized.
First off, you don't even know a [ __ ]
definition of trauma. All right? Trauma
is a permanent change in behavior from
an aversive stimulus, meaning something
bad happens and forever it changes how
you act. Now, let's if we understand
that as the definition of trauma, is
trauma bad? Well, if I touch a stove and
then I never touch a stove again when
it's hot, is that trauma bad? It
permanently changed my behavior from an
aversive stimulus. Is that trauma bad?
Well, it prevented me from get burning
the house down from, you know,
permanently damaging my hand in the
future. No, I would say it was good. And
so this whole appraisal of your past
being tough or you don't understand,
bro. No. And no one cares either. They
don't understand, nor do they care. And
so all anyone is going to care about is
how you act, how you behave, what you do
based on a series of conditions. And so
you just need to expose yourself to the
conditions so that you can get the
repetition so that you can learn how to
overcome it. The thing that determines
whether it's good or bad is whether it
creates a behavior that's conducive to
your goals. And so that means that
fundamentally you can have a stimulus
like touching the stove that creates a
behavior that is conducive to the goal.
In that way, trauma was good. So, by the
way, parents, when you punish a child,
the hope is that you traumatize them. Is
that you permanently change their
behavior from an aversive stimulus? It's
just that people don't define words and
they just shout them all over the place.
Say, say it's stored in your body. It's
energy. It's like, no one even knows
what the [ __ ] that means. Show me on
someone's body where it's stored. Do me
an X-ray. Show me where this No. Come
on. Like, you're saying you're you
you're storing your emotional trauma
from your father and your liver.
Like I can just say words and make
things up and get people to not if I say
them with conviction. It doesn't make.
And so you may have been fooled because
sometimes it's more convenient to say
you can cast your power onto this thing
that happened that was outside of your
control as the reason why you can't be
successful because it's easier to say
that than to say that I chose not to do
anything about it anyways.
And again, listen, you can do whatever
you want. You can just keep wallowing in
that. You can keep saying that that's
the reason. And wherever you point is
where your power is, right? But the only
time that you'll have more power is if
you say it's on you. Period. Because all
of those things may have happened and
they may have all been terrible. And
what are you going to do about it,
right? Because the only per like no one
cares. Like the world doesn't care. You
care, which is fine, but like no one
else does. And the sooner you realize
that, the sooner you can start doing
something about it. And so also think
about this. It's the equal opposite. If
trauma can create good things, then also
means that good things can create bad
behaviors. And so if you win the lottery
and then you have all these behaviors
that happen afterwards that are
negative, then was it good for you? Like
we talk about these rich and privileged
kids because it creates behaviors that
people that actually make it less likely
they achieve things later. And so just
think about what occurred and what
behaviors you take as a result and
separate good or bad from it. And just
think, does it make it more likely that
I hit my goals?
It makes life a lot easier. And then it
stops you from speaking in voodoo and
speaking and appealing to mysticism and
magic. Like there's this this force
around I have demons. It's like, dude,
no. Like you had a girl who cheated on
you. Okay. Now, what does that change
about your behavior? I have trust
issues. No, it just means that under
these conditions, you are slower to give
someone access to your bank account or
slower to move in with someone, who
cares? And is that a bad thing? And so,
I'll walk you through a three-step
framework that has been unbelievably
valuable to me. And this is from Dr.
Cashy. Logic, evidence, utility.
Logic is what does that mean? So, you
have demons. Okay. What does that mean?
Define it in terms of behavior. What
does that mean? Okay, got it. Now, how
do you know that evidence? So, you say,
"I have demons." We unpack that and it
means that uh for you, you
self-sabotage, which again, define that.
Okay? It means that I show up late to
meetings after I get into a job after
two months of being on time. Okay? So
after two months of being on time, you
start being late to stuff that we
translated from I have demons to I
self-sabotage to that is the behavior
that occurs. Got it? Now I would say how
do you know that? Now a lot of times
people are like well it's happened. But
when you actually look at it like it
happened three times over in, you know,
in my my last job. Okay. Is it really a
a problem as you define it or it
happened in those three occurrences?
Okay, got it. So now you know now most
times people are like I don't have any
data and you're like okay so then this
is basically made up and when I say made
up I'm not saying it's like you are a
liar. I'm just saying that humans work
in narratives and a lot of times we add
narratives stories to things that don't
actually mean anything but it's
convenient and it's fun and we like
talking about it but it doesn't mean
it's true. And so then you move to the
third one which is and so what utility
who cares why does this matter? And so
then you say, "Okay, well this matters
because it decreases the likelihood that
I will be able to retain future
employment." Fine. Then what do we do
about it? And so you can walk through
things that you have struggled with in
the past with simply saying, "Let me
define this in terms of behavior. How
what evidence do I have that this is
actually true that that I've defined it
based on these things?" And who cares?
I have demons in the kitchen. All right.
Just as a completely ridiculous example.
Okay. Well, in my past, I I've had bad
things happen, bro. Like, what? Like,
what occurred? I touched the stove and
it burned me. Okay, great. Now, we have
some evidence-wise. How many times did
it happen? One time. Okay. And it never
happened again in the future. Okay. What
did that result in? I don't go into
kitchens anymore. Okay. Now, this is
good or bad. When you say, "Who cares?"
It's in relation to what? My goals. Does
you not going into the kitchen prevent
you from achieving your goals? Well, if
you want to be a chef, yes. If you want
to be an entrepreneur, no. If you want
to be a kitchen entrepreneur, probably,
right? And so, the question is just who
cares? Why does it matter? And so, so
much of our time and effort goes into
explaining things to people that don't
matter at all that you could literally
just move on from and just literally
forget about. You could get over that
quote trauma by changing the behavior
that it changed aversively. So in this
context or in this condition, I behave
this way and it's not conducive to my
goals. Great. That's good that you've
identified it. Cool. So what do we need
to do so that when you're in the
condition, how can we increase the
likelihood that you do act the way that
you want to? And then you start stacking
the deck to start shifting the pendulum
in your favor. And you start attacking
each of these little problems from
skills that you have, whether it's
behavior with people or it's skills at
work or with a relationship. And you
just do it one by one by one. And if you
do it over a very long period of time,
you get better. I promise you. And I'm
saying this to somebody who I struggled
with my demons. You don't understand,
bro. Like, I have stuff. Like, okay,
but it doesn't help you. And it also
doesn't make you look harder.
It just makes you less capable.
Losers talk about what happened to them.
Winners talk about what they made happen
despite it. Hardship is a reality for
losers. to winners. Hardship is just
your origin story. And like I promise
you, if you can use this frame, like I
was texting Leila the other day, like
the bigger the monster, the more epic
the hero. It's the story that you're
going to someday tell. When you're 85,
you're not going to want more boring
stories, right? The idea is that if
you're going through hardship now,
that's the story that you're going to
tell. And if you believe yourself to be
the hero that you want to someday
become, then the harder it is, you're
like, "Bring it. This is my story. This
is the Spider-Man getting bitten. This
is him getting beat up by the bullies.
This is the origin story. No one cares
about a hero who never had it hard. I
bought a lottery ticket years and years
and years ago when I was in college
because it was like a a billion or
something like that back back then that
was when a billion dollars meant
something. Um
but I was in college and the and my
girlfriend at the time I was talking to
her and the drawing was that we bought
them for fun. We bought one ticket. I
wasn't expecting to win, but it was just
a it basically I was buying her for the
conversation. And I thought about it as
like the drawing got closer and I
realized I had this big pang of anxiety
because I was like, "What if I win?" And
I had this moment of terror because I
realized that if I won that I would
never be able to achieve anything that
anyone thought was my own.
And that thought terrified me. And
thankfully I didn't win the billion
dollars. Um, and I got to make the life
that I have. And so I think that I think
Epictitus says this, but it's something
to the degree of what a shame it would
be for someone to never encounter
hardship because they would never be
able to see who they are.
And so I think that if you have gone
through hardship or you are going
through hardship, this is the
opportunity to prove to yourself, not
anyone else, that you are who you say
you are and you are made of what you say
you are made of. And you can choose
to allow that hardship to make you
harder, to make you more resilient, to
make you more persistent, to make you
more relentless, to make you more driven
towards whatever you want to do or
whoever you want to be. Or you can allow
it to be an ankle weight. You can allow
it to be your trauma, right? That is
your demon that you're fighting every
day. But the thing is is like everyone
has demons. Everyone has hard [ __ ] And
I want to tell you this frame that'll
hopefully change someone's perspective,
which is that your hard stuff may have
been harder than other people's hard
stuff, but if I take a human being who
has never encountered anything and then
I poke them with a needle, that will be
a 10 out of 10 hardship for them. And so
I believe personally that humans
experience pain the same way. It's why
when a man feels disrespected, it hurts
just as much as someone else going
through another crazy hardship. And you
know what? Even if that guy's white, a
10 out of 10 pain still feels like a 10
out of 10 pain. Now, could that pain be
less on the absolute scale of worst
scenario? Yeah, it could be. But also,
who cares?
And so my point here is that every
single human being on earth has gone
through their version of 10 out of 10
pain which normalizes pain across the
spectrum which then leaves you with the
only natural thing you have left which
is what do I do now? And if you wanted
to design the perfect version of you,
the savage competitor, the gladiator at
the end of the life that has the scars
and the scraggly beard but has been
through [ __ ] and has done things and has
and has realized their potential. What
would you do to maximize the likelihood
that you become that savage hero? Would
you give them the padded lifestyle?
Would you give them the immediate win?
Would you give them the easy life?
Probably not. You would probably put you
through what you're going through right
now to become that person. And so, why
would you resent the chapter you're in?
Because it's a requirement for becoming
who you say you want to be. Let's say
you've gotten over your little demon
thing. And when I say gotten over, you
just stop giving it power by saying it
now is the reason that you can't be
successful. Awesome. So, what do you do
now? Right? So, you got to start
figuring things out. And that figure it
out muscle is probably the most powerful
muscle you can build. It's just saying,
"Oh, I don't know how to do this. I will
figure it out." Why? Because I figured
out things in the past and I can do it
again. And if that person can do it and
they're no smarter than I am, they have
two hands in a brain. I can do it, too.
So, the next time that you say you can't
figure something out, just set a timer
for 20 hours and actually try for 20
hours before you quit. What you'll often
realize is it's not hard. You just
haven't even tried yet. If you can
shrink the time between saying you want
to learn something and beginning to try
the thing and extend the time before you
say, "Hey, this is hard, then you will
be able to accomplish way more than you
think." You can learn most things in 20
hours. The problem is that most people
delay the first 20 hours by years. And
if you really measured yourself by the
amount of action you take, not your
desire, not your deservingness, or even
your effort, you might actually be
embarrassed because what you're looking
at is reality. It's about what you do,
not what you say you're going to do, how
much you want the outcome from what
you're doing, how much you think you
deserve the thing that's going to happen
after you do it, or how hard you try.
Because one, no one cares. Two, reality
doesn't care either, because the only
thing that matters that you can control
is input. And you would be absolutely
astonished at what you can accomplish
when you give yourself no choice. Every
third time I do a Q&A, I get asked the
question, "What keeps you going when
things were tough? Like, what did you
think about?" and I could come up with
something that was really compelling.
But the honest truth is I just never
considered quitting. It was just not it
was just not on my choice of options at
the table because for me the idea of
going back to Baltimore as a failure was
so much worse than anything else that I
could encounter that it just it just
wasn't even a consideration. And so the
only natural option I had was to
persist, was to endure, was to continue.
And so I think if you use that frame as
there have been people who have gone
through significantly worse than what
I'm going through right now. And for
those of you who claim the demon card of
like I've been through [ __ ] then prove
it. Was it worse than this? Great. Then
you can prove that it was so hard by
being hard now. Across time frames in
history, across countries, across
cultures, across age groups, across
race, gender, everyone respects the man
who works. Because as men we are always
judged by what we can do and if you are
doing things then people know that you
are contributing that is how you prove
utility. Work ethic is the currency of
respect. If you want to earn respect you
earn it through work and sometimes
that's working on yourself that's
sometimes working on a skill working on
a product but it is all through work
through effort. I will tell you
something that shifted my life which is
that entrepreneurship is not a game of
best man wins. It's a game of last man
standing. And there's a lot of games
that are like this. And fundamentally,
that's an infinite game frame versus a
finite game frame. And I will read you
the quote that Ila had framed and put in
my office. Ask the girl, shoot the shot,
launch the business, run the ad, quit
the job, take the risk. Because when
you're 85 years old and on your
deathbed, you're not going to wish you
had fewer crazy stories. The fastest way
to become confident is to build
evidence. Build yourself a stack of
undeniable proof that you are who you
say you are. Here's exactly how to do
that. This is brutally honest advice to
my younger, less confident self. Having
an epic story is about asking the girl.
It's about shooting the shot. It's about
launching the business, about running
the ad, about knocking on the door,
quitting the job, taking the risk. When
you're 85 years old and on your
deathbed, you're not going to wish you
had fewer crazy stories. You're going to
wish you had taken more shots. Don't
build confidence. Build evidence.
Confidence comes as a result of
evidence, not the other way around.
Confidence without evidence is a
delusion. It's you beating your chest,
looking at yourself in the mirror,
trying to pretend you're something
you're not. Do it so you get the
confidence, but don't think you need
confidence to do it. So, the whole idea
of fake it until you make it should
switch to walk it before you talk it,
right? Prove it to yourself so you don't
need to prove it to other people and let
your path to your talking for you. Until
you win, effort always goes unnoticed.
Get used to it. If you aren't willing to
suck, you're never going to get good.
Losers stay losers because they aren't
willing to lose. Confidence is also
domain specific. So you can be really
good at public presentations and really
bad at talking to girls. It takes a lot
for a skill to transfer between domains.
And so if you want to get good at the
thing, don't try and do something to the
left of it. Just do the thing. The first
sales consult I ever took. I didn't
close. And I say that because everyone
just imagines that Mosy just came in
just slinging credit cards and stacking
bodies, right? It didn't work that way.
I came in, it was a 5-minute
conversation. The girl was like, "I need
to go get my card from home." home and I
said, "Oh yeah, okay, go do that." And
she walked away and I went to my boss.
He's like, "How'd it go?" I said, "Oh, I
closed her." And he was like, "Oh,
that's awesome." He's like, "You got the
credit card?" I said, "Oh, no. She's
going to come back with the card." And
he literally stopped what he was doing
with six other guys around him and they
all non-stop laugh a minute straight.
Like they couldn't breathe cuz they
thought how stupid what I had just said
was. But I had no idea. And so that was
my first ever experience in sales. I'm
known for sales now. And I wouldn't even
say I'm confident in sales. It's just
more like this is what works and has
worked for me. Take it or leave it. And
so people perceive that as confidence,
but it's simply just based on
experience. And confidence comes from
experience. What it really is is a
prediction. What you think is going to
happen will happen. And so even in
statistics, what is your confidence
metric? This is 7.8. It's literally just
what the percentage likelihood that what
you think is going to happen is going to
happen. And so, how do you increase the
likelihood that what you think is going
to happen is going to happen? Have it
have happened already. I could have
either spent 30 minutes every day
looking at myself in the mirror and
telling myself I was going to be a great
sales guy, or I could have reviewed the
[ __ ] script. Which one do you think
would get make me a better salesperson?
Reviewing the script. You can take all
the time that you're trying to spend
psyching yourself up and you'll feel
significantly more confident not having
done that and simply knowing what you're
going to say, which you get from
practice. The world belongs to those who
can keep doing without seeing the result
of their doing. And the longer you can
wait to see the result of your doing
while still continuing to do is the
extent to which you can win big in life.
For example, to be a top 1% podcaster,
you have to upload 21 podcasts. 21. Top
1%. 90% of people don't get past one. 9%
don't get past 20. And then 1% of
podcasters of all of them make it to 21
plus. So when people say try harder, it
usually just means don't give up. The
price for excellence has never been so
low. People give up so easily now that
it's just so easy to win by just being
willing to post 20 times. You're in the
top 1%. Like I'm at the top 1%. We're
not even talking 10. Top half. Top 1%.
People are so afraid of being
humiliated. They get the long-term
humiliation of never amounting to
anything. No one's going to watch your
first 20 episodes anyways. And even if
they do, it doesn't matter because
that's not what you're building towards.
Like you posting those 20 isn't what you
judge yourself on. You should be judging
yourself on the difference between your
first one and your 20th one. Are you
better? Probably. And the difference
between your 20th one and your hundth
one because the win is you. You are the
asset you're building, not the downloads
that you get on your first shot. Mosy
immediately had a podcast with millions
of downloads every single month. No, I
spent 4 and a half years making two
podcasts a week straight. Didn't miss.
And guess how many podcast downloads I
was getting per month at the end of
that? 2 to 3,000 downloads a month. Not
a lot. I used to think to myself, okay,
well, each one of these podcasts gets
like 200 downloads. Well, 200 downloads
is like an auditorium of people. And so,
would I feel okay giving a speech to 200
people? Yeah. And even before that, when
they was getting like 10 or 15 downloads
per episode, if I had a little lunch and
learn that I would I used to have to do
to like get leads for a business, I'd be
fine talking to a group of 10 or 15
people because the reality is that those
people are doing me more of a favor than
I'm doing them. They're literally giving
me their ears so that I can practice my
voice and how to talk and how to
present. And it was only at year 4 and a
half to five when things started taking
off. And you know what the two things
that changed are? One is I did call it I
changed it from gym secrets to just the
game which was a business thing. So it
made it more applicable to more people.
And the second thing and here's the real
one is that I sold a company for $46
million. And so people are like oh what
does this guy have to say? And the big
thing that everyone misses is people try
and dissect my content. The message is
10% of how people consume it. 90% is the
context around the message. So Elon Musk
can tweet on the toilet and be like,
"I'm on the throne taking a shit." And
it'll get a million likes. Why? Because
it's Elon Musk. He's the richest man in
the world and owns three of the biggest
companies that are most innovative of
all time. I don't kid myself and think
that like my content is so much better
than other people. There's plenty of
people with better content than me that
don't get the same views. And the reason
is because they don't have the context.
They don't have the proof. And solve for
the proof. And then the content will
take care of itself. Because one, you
will know what you're talking about
because you have proof that you know
what you're talking about. and people
will believe you. Which is why you
should solve for evidence above
everything else. Like evidence gives you
the confidence. If someone says, "Alex,
I don't think you know [ __ ] about
business." I'd be like, "Okay." It
doesn't really affect me. I do know we
crossed $100 million in net worth at age
32. I know that. But if someone said
that to you and you haven't accomplished
anything, you don't have anything to
stand back on and it hurts you more. But
I have proof. So it's like you can just
deflect it towards the proof and keep
living your life. The secret to
longevity is, especially in the content
game, but really in any game that you're
trying to at least help other people
with, is that if you've done the thing,
you can be certain rather than
confident. Be certain based on what
you've done, not based on what you say
other people should do. There used to be
too big to fail. And I think there's an
alternative, which is too good to fail.
If you make your stuff so [ __ ] good
that only one person who gets exposed to
it sends it to somebody else, then you
have nothing to worry about and you will
eventually get discovered. It's a time
game. And in the meanwhile, you just
keep getting better, which is the point,
because at the end of the day, you're
going to die. Everyone's going to forget
about you anyways. And so, you might as
well just work on the one asset that you
get to keep for the rest of your life,
which is you. And rather than measuring
yourself based on how many views he gets
versus how many views you get, measure
yourself by how much work he puts into
one of his shorts versus what you put
into one of your shorts. And then you
might think the output is more
reasonable. And if there's a top sales
guy in your organization who's making
more money than you, compare not what
his commission check is to yours every
month, compare how many calls he's
making, how many times he practices the
script, how many calls he's made before
you, how many sales he's closed before
you, what time a day he shows up at
work, what time a day he leaves, whether
he works weekends or not, whether he's
willing to hop on the phone in a family
context so they can still close the
deal. If you're doing all the inputs,
the m the outputs will always match on a
long enough time horizon. And if you are
new to the game, then my recommendation
is not only to match inputs, but to
double or triple the inputs that someone
ahead of you is doing. And the reason
you do that is because if you just match
your inputs, then you're always going to
be behind them because they're already
ahead of you because they're better than
you. And so if you both do the same
amount of work, they're going to keep
getting better and so are you. So you
have to do twice the work. You got to be
like Kobe, right? Where everyone else is
doing one practice a day, you do two
practices a day. And in the beginning,
they'll be better than you and then
you'll match them. But because you're
doing twice the work, eventually you'll
get better and then that's how you win.
Yeah. Again, one of the biggest
misnomers in in whatever endeavor you're
trying to track is people track the
wrong metrics. They track the lagging
metrics rather than the leading metrics.
Lagging metrics are what happen. Those
are the outputs. And if you want to
track those, fine. But the real things
to track are what you're doing to create
the outputs. So, I don't want to
necessarily even track sales. I want to
track how many calls I'm making. If I'm
trying to get in shape, I'm not
necessarily going to track the weight
I'm doing. I'm going to track how many
calories I'm eating. And so, the more
ways you measure, the more ways you can
win. And so the idea, the ultimate win
at life is where you can shift things
that are out of your control that you
deem winning to things that are under
your control which you can deem winning.
Because if you're measuring on whether
you lost the fat or not, sometimes
people take longer, some people don't.
That's something that you actually can't
control. What you can control are the
inputs. And so if you say based on this,
if I do this one thing every day for a
long enough period of time, I'll
eventually get there. the real winners.
Cut out the I'll eventually get there
and say if I do this every day, I have
won. The thing that I try and focus on
now is the delta between how hard I
tried and how hard I can possibly try.
And if I know that the gap between those
two is zero, then I have won. And I've
decided to spend a inordinate amount of
effort trying to make that my definition
of winning is that there's nothing left
in the tank. If you get into a harder
career path or one that takes more reps
to get good at or more reps to get into,
then every day you can win based on
saying like everyone else does 100, I do
250 and I have nothing left to give. I
won and that should satisfy you. And if
you're if you're obsessive on the
external thing, that takes too long and
you will give up too soon. One of the
things that took me too long to learn
was the difference between the finite
and infinite frame. And so finite frame
is where you have known players, agreed
upon rules, and a way to win or lose at
the end. And then the game is over.
Infinite frame, you have known and
unknown players, no agreed upon rules,
and the point of the game is to keep the
game going. And all the greatest games
that I've ever participated in,
marriage, health, business, you don't
win at marriage. The point is to stay
married. You don't win at health. The
point is to stay in shape. You don't win
at business. The point is to stay in
business. And so by default, if you
don't give up, you win. And so that's
the big frame shift, which is why
leaving everything on the field is the
way you have to define winning if you
want to win in the long term. And
anything worth doing takes great time.
If you stick with it and you make that
the win, you'll notice that the external
win will just happen on its own. And if
you really commit to that perspective,
it won't even mean much to you. Because
if you make that everything, it's the
same thing with the guys who win the
golds and then kill themselves or win
the championship and then go into these
massive depressions. It's because
they're playing the wrong game. When
Kobe was asked shortly before he died
like, "Do you think that you're somebody
who's afraid of losing or do you think
you're somebody who loves winning?" He
basically denied both frames. He said,
I'm paraphrasing, "I just love playing
to the best of my ability." And that's
what he measures himself off of. The
fact that the world chooses to measure
him on the fact that he's won so many
games. That's the world's problem,
not ours. It's saying I'm game master,
not a player, and I choose to play by
these rules. And as long as I am
playing, I win by default. And it's cuz
I'm not accepting the world's rules for
winning. I make my own. An easier
analogy here is, and this is a Naval
Ravicon quote, he said, "What looks like
work to other people should feel like
play for you." If you look at an artist
and he's painting, you're like, "Hey,
how soon are you going to finish that
painting?" The point for the artist is
to paint. He'll finish that piece and
he'll start the next one. But the
process of painting is the thing that
they enjoy. And so the idea is that if
you can commit and the broader you can
generalize what you're committing to,
the easier it will be to stick with it.
So you might be like, I love making
calls, but I hate entering things in the
CRM. Well, both of those are required
for the role of sales. And so I prefer
to chunk up a level and say, I prefer to
do hard work because of what that work
does to me. Then whether I'm putting
[ __ ] into the CRM or editing a document
or having a hard conversation, all of
those things are difficult and I see
those as all contributing to the person
I ultimately want to be until eventually
I die and it won't matter anyways. And
so the only asset that you really get to
keep with you is your character and
that's the only thing you keep building.
And so if you make the character the W
at the end of the day, did or I did I
not contribute to the character of the
person that I want to become? If that's
the W every day, you can never lose. If
you have your menu option of things that
you can do in life, just remove quitting
as one of them and then try your next
idea. And if you are in that rocky cut
scene and you're two months in, three
months in, remember that the rocky cut
scene in the movie lasts a couple
seconds and the rocky cut scene in real
life might last a few years. And so
whenever I get to a low point where I
think, why do I even bother doing this?
I just like to remind myself this is
where most people stop and this is why
they don't win. And as hard as this is
going to sound, the best thing that I
ever did was not listen to other
people's opinions about my life. They
don't want the best version of you. They
want the version of you who best serves
them. And unfortunately, the closer
people are to you, the more similarly
they'll see themselves and you. And the
more your success will make them feel
bad about themselves. And I can promise
you this from somebody who might be a
little further. I have more people who
root for me now that I've already won
than people who rooted for me along the
way. No one is doing as well as you
think they're doing. So by comparison,
everyone is better off than they think
because the cumulative median visually
is probably three times higher than what
the actual median is. And so if you're
like, "Oh, I'm average or slightly below
average compared to the perceived median
of society. You're probably way above
average." And that's okay. And being
above or below average doesn't even
matter anyways because you've got a lot
of innings left. there's a lot of
quarters left to play. And so like until
the day you die, you still have hope.
You still have a chance. You can still
keep moving forward. Whenever someone
gives you your their opinion about what
you should do with their your life, it's
really them saying, "This is my
preference of how I want to live my
life." And I say, "Great. Live your life
that way and I'll live my life this
way." Because me living my life has no
effect on you. So live your life the way
you want to live it. And I don't want
your life either. They state make those
statements because they feel
uncomfortable and so they have to like
release it and so they say that to you
to make themselves feel better and
that's their problem not yours. I think
I've learned a lot of frames around not
caring about others people's opinions be
out of necessity because I was so
crippled by the opinions of other people
for what felt like such a long time that
I always had to face my death in order
to get myself to move. And so I talk
about death a lot because it has
actually been one of the few things that
actually motivates me to change my
behavior. And so when I had done all the
things that I thought would impress
other people, one, I realized that they
didn't really care. And secondly, I
realized that I deeply cared about how
much I hated my life. When I was like,
is this what winning feels like? Because
if this is what winning is, then I don't
want to play. By thinking, I'd rather be
dead than continue to play this game. I
was forced to change the game I was
playing, which is like, well, what is a
game that I would like to win at? Well,
I'd like to win a game that is by rules
that I set out and there are things that
I can control. And then those people
because you break their mold of what
they're supposed to be doing and they
might be miserable, too, but they are
not willing to take the risk that you're
willing to take because they care about
other people's opinions more than you do
because they haven't gone through that
little journey that you just went
through. Fine. You do it your way. They
do it their way. I mean, I went from
prodigal son, my father's super proud of
me, graduating Vanderbilt in three
years, president of the fraternity, vice
president of the powerlifting team,
management consultant, to a minimum wage
employee. Like, that's a pretty
significant drop in status. I have these
frames because people will say whatever
they want, but for me, that relative
drop in status was a lot. I went from
about as high status as you can get in a
as a 22-year-old to about as low status
as you can get. I mean, I remember
having people be like, "So, did you go
to college?" And I was like, "Yeah, I
went to college and I [ __ ] murdered
it and I did everything." And the cuz
the implied question is, "Why are you
here?" And so that's what in the
beginning hurt a ton. But then I just
realized that they just didn't know and
they were asking genuinely. And all of
my judgment around that was just my own
problem. How I'm perceiving this
question is affecting my mood to such a
great degree. What if I applied this to
every question? All these people are
asking me things and I'm either getting
offended or getting complimented, but
the statement doesn't change. So that
sounds like a me problem. And so the
more I started diving into things like
that, the less bothered I became by
other everyone else's opinion because
they also have no context. Even if they
did mean it as an insult, so what if
they're saying, "Well, I'm better than
you." I'd be like, "Yes, you are." A lot
of even really successful people frame
their success around trying to prove
someone wrong, right? But when you try
and create your entire existence in
opposition to someone, you actually give
them complete control over your life. It
means that because of the things that
this person has said, I will choose to
change all of my behavior. Which
basically means that the directives from
that person have commanded you to do
whatever you do. And if you like to be a
free person and want to be somebody who
acts of their own valition, then I
choose to accept insults so that I can
live my life rather than living in
contrast to them and giving my control
to the person who insulted me. I that
would mean I put me changing your mind
above my goals, which I don't do. My
goals are more important to me than
changing your mind. I'm super sensitive
to IM statements, labeling statements
like this. Like, I'm a neat freak. I'm
the type of person who. So, whenever
you're dating someone, you're getting to
know someone, people like to blanket I
am statements really early on to set the
stage. Like, I'm this type I'm the type
of person who likes to show up early. I
like to clean things. I'm a labeler. I'm
a whatever. And then, and this is the
insidious part, they then say because,
and then they insert a reason that they
made up or that sounded good in the past
and people nodded their heads and agreed
with because my mom never loved me
enough. because I didn't get enough
hugs, because I gave a speech once and
everyone laughed at me. Because you
don't know. And the reality is you will
never know. All we know is that you do a
certain type of behavior. That's it. By
giving these because statements all this
power, you actually put all the power
into something that is unchangeable in
the past and so you have to keep dealing
with it. Whereas, if you just said, I do
these things period. Now, if I want to
change what I do, then I should just
reward myself in the present for doing
something different. And that makes it a
lot more malleable and it makes your
identity and what you do as a result or
rather what you do and your identity as
a result something under your control.
You don't want to blame the things in
the past that you can't change. You want
to blame things in the present that you
can't. So if you said I have trouble
getting close to girls because my mom
and I aren't close one, you give your
mother all the power in your love life.
You give power to something that
happened in the past that you can't
change to things that are happening in
the present that you can change. And so
would it be more useful to say in the
past I have struggled to get close to
girls period. Now that could be for a
number of reasons. Thing is is that you
don't know what reason it is cuz I could
say let's say imagine all these things
happened. You struggled with your mom.
Let's say you had a bad breakup at some
point in your life. You're not in shape.
I could say I struggle getting close to
girls. And I could use any of those
three as my reasons. But which of those
serve me? None of them. All we know is
that you struggle to get close to girls.
Okay. Well, then just look at what it
would take to get close to girls and
then do that rather than having this
other thing that's attached to the
behavior that you can't do anything
about. It just makes changing who you
are and what you do a lot easier.
Sometimes people are such douchebags.
They will tell a young child, "You will
never have a successful relationship
with a woman because you don't respect
or love me." A mother. Or the reverse
could be true of a father. They're a
[ __ ] douchebag for saying that
because they are labeling you with
something that you can't change. But
that's their problem. It also is no
basis. In fact, when people are like,
"Look at how the son treats the mother.
That's how he's going to treat his
wife." Why the [ __ ] would I treat my
wife like I treat my mother? Dear God,
that's just a statement that sounds good
but has no basis in fact. You treat your
wife like you treat your wife. You treat
your mother like you treat your mother.
They're different people. People want to
have problems because it gives them a
reason to suck and it be okay. It gives
them ego padding so they can protect
themselves for the reason why they're
not successful, for the reason they
haven't accomplished what they said they
were going to accomplish. And so they
lean on their potential, and their
trauma as the two reasons that people
prop up. I've got lots of potential, but
I have all this trauma. And neither of
those matter. I've gone through three
stages of like mental development in
terms of how I see changing my behavior.
In the beginning, I attributed my
behavior to my past traumas. The second
phase was that I I chose to change the
story. What if my mother was just trying
to feel better and it wasn't my fault.
So then I changed my behavior in that
sense. The third phase, which is where
I'm at now, maybe there'll be a fourth
phase, but the the third phase was I
behave this way, period. The because
statement in the second half is
completely irrelevant. One, because I
don't know it. Two, because I can't
change it. So I might as well just
choose to do the thing that I want to
do. Irrelevant of my past. The single
strongest predictor of my behavior is
what will make the more epic story. I've
thought about that frame a lot and it's
still continued to win out. And so when
I'm forced to make a decision between
two things, I prefer to choose the one
that's the more epic story because
either you have an epic story of failure
or you have an epic story of success.
But no 85year-olds are regretting their
epic stories. They are regretting the
stories they never told. Our minds are
meaning-making machines and they have to
be because they create associations
between things we know and things we
don't know. That's how we learn. The
problem is that our brains will make
wrong associations and then they will
plague us for the rest of our lives. But
we can just redefine what the
association means for ourel to make our
lives easier. Because whether you miss
the game-winning shot when there's a
huge crowd or you miss it when no one
else is there, the only reason it hurts
more is because you choose to let it
hurt you more. Now, there are things
that you can do prior to the
game-winning shot that can increase the
likelihood that you make it, which is
that you practice way more in high
stakes conditions over and over and over
again. If you do that, it increases the
likelihood, your confidence that you'll
be able to make it. Why? Because you've
made them before. And if you're like,
well, I missed my first ever
game-winning shot. Now, what do I do?
But you practice in every other
condition that's as close to that as you
can until eventually you make one. And
then when you do make one, you'll have
evidence that you've made one and you
try and make one again. What you
probably don't know is that Michael
Jordan has missed more game-winning
shots than he has made. But he's
remembered for the ones that he made.
But how was he able to make them? By
missing and being willing to shoot
again. On that basis of story, the many
excuses that we give ourselves in
reverse can make a more epic story. And
so rather than say like these are all
the reasons that I can't succeed, I
think reframing that as these are all
the reasons that when I succeed it'll be
an even better story and it'll be more
inspiring to other people is a much more
powerful frame. The more disadvantages
you have when you start, the more epic
story you have when you win. Donald
Miller has one of the most powerful
frames of heroes and villains I've ever
heard of. Heroes and villains always
have the same backstory. It's pain.
They're always an orphan, right? Or the
the villain has some sort of
disfigurement to show that they went
through hard times. The difference is
what the character chooses to do about
it. Villains say, "The world hurt me.
I'm going to hurt it back." Heroes say,
"The world hurt me. I'm not going to let
anyone else hurt this way." So, heroes
use pain. Villains are used by it. And
so, I think all of us have the choice to
become our own heroes, our own villains
in our own life simply by how we choose
to deal with the pain that we all
inevitably experience. So, pain is a
constant. The choice about how we react
to it is the thing that dictates the
path of our lives. You know, there there
are certain rules of playing the game
that have served me really well. One of
them is, and that's okay. And I probably
use that frame more than anything else,
which is I'm not close with XYZ
relative, your parent, your mom, your
sister, your brother. And that's okay. I
spent a lot of my mental effort trying
to untangle stories that I told in the
past about things that were my fault or
were a problem. And the easiest way that
I found to solve problems is to decide
they're not problems to begin with. I
have a handful of pictures that I took
for the first 5 years of sucking during
business. And I use those pictures all
the time, every day. And the zillions of
pictures after I became successful, I
barely use any of them. The time to
document your life is when it sucks, not
when it's great. Because those are the
stories that you're going to tell. And
those are going to be the reminders that
you use in the present day of things
that you have been through and proof as
to who you really are. Because my
favorite line in the matrix is in the
second or third matrix when Morpheus is
standing on the hill and he's looking
out towards everyone. And he said, "I
stand here truthfully unafraid, not
because of the path that lies before me,
but because of the path that lies behind
me." And so the struggle period that you
may be in right now is the path behind
your future self that you are building.
so that that man or that woman can stand
on the pulpit and look at you straight
dead in the eyes in the mirror and say,
"I am confident and I stand truthfully
here unafraid, not because of what I
said my goal is going to be, but because
what I've been through to get here." And
so, here's my advice to my younger self.
Document your life more. Otherwise,
you'll forget the details. And the
details are what make it worth
remembering. It's the times you're
sleeping on the floor. It's the time the
person walks out and you miss the
seventh sale that day. It's the time
when your bank account's at its absolute
lowest. It's when your car breaks down
on the side of the road and you're like,
"What am I going to do now? I can barely
afford this." Right? Those are the
moments, the ones that you want to
ignore, the ones that you want to look
away from, that are the ones that you
need to capture because those are the
moments that you will tell in the future
of things you got through. Because no
heroes are heroes without epic monsters.
And the bigger the monster, the greater
the hero. When I was poor, I didn't need
motivation. I needed someone to give me
tactical advice. If I could talk to my
younger poorer self, this is what I
would say. This is more brutally honest
advice to my younger poorer self. This
advice is only for somebody who wants to
make more money growing their business,
growing themselves. People obsessed with
their morning routines make less money
than people obsessed with making money.
People work, sacrifice, and then they
get rich. Then they fill their time with
weird routines. Then they forget how
they got rich in the first place. And
then they tell other people the weird
routines made them rich rather than what
they actually did, which is whatever it
took, not some 3-hour morning routine.
There was a kid who DM'd me who said,
"Hey, I've been working with this
business coach and he has me doing a
morning routine. Could not make this up.
After I do my grounded walking, I do my
gratitude journal. I do my list for the
day. I do my ice plunge." He's like,
"After I do that, it takes me about 3
hours in the morning to get all that
done." He's like, "I barely have any
energy to like actually get work done."
I just said, "I'm going to give you the
biggest hack in the world. Cut the
3-hour morning routine, replace it with
3 hours of work, and I promise you'll
get more done." And he messaged me back
a week later. He was like, "Dude, it
changed my whole life. I'm getting so
much done now." I was like, "What a
[ __ ] concept. If you work more, more
gets done." And I love just looking at
this. It's like, "What actions do I have
to take to get what I want?" Anything
that is not that is a distraction from
it, period. If it takes you 5 minutes to
feel 20% better, and you can actually
measure that your output goes up by 20%.
Then cool, that makes sense. So, I'm not
I'm not against doing things. I'm
against doing things for the sake of
doing them.
And so one of the biggest issues with
learning and education as humans do it
is that we make correlations to things
that are approximate. They're close to
one another. Tall people play
basketball. I should play basketball to
get tall. We make these very mistaken
correlations. But we should look at is
what it took to get there, not what
they're doing now. So the better advice
is to look at what someone was doing on
their way up in the grind. Mirror that
more than what they're currently doing
at the top of the mountain. So it would
be like assuming Warren Buffett is rich
because he drinks Coke. I drink probably
5 12 oz Cokes a day.
>> All you have to do also on the corlary
is are there other people who drink Coke
who aren't rich? I've had probably 10
different podcasts seed the premise. Do
you think that the fact that you had a
hard childhood has created the success
today? And I would say no. I would say
the work that I did created the success
and all we have to do is look at all the
other people who had bad childhoods who
aren't successful. And I think there are
way more of those than there are that
are to prove that it actually has
nothing to do with who's successful.
There's also people who didn't have bad
childhoods who are successful, too. And
so it's just that many people have bad
childhoods. Some of them become
successful. And so that's why trying to
figure out why something happened. I
have spent less and less of my effort
trying to do that and only look at what
actions created a result rather than
looking at intention or anything else
that's amorphous that can't be measured.
30 isn't the new 20. It's an excuse to
take 10 years longer to accomplish the
same thing. You can die when you're
done. Until then, keep going. In your
20s, you're young. You can [ __ ] around.
It doesn't matter cuz life is long.
Number one, that assumes that you're not
going to die. If you're in your 30s, you
know someone in your high school class
who died. And it's not just the drug
overdose people. It's the people who got
shot, got in a car accident, had a weird
brain cancer. I've had all of those
things happened to people that I went to
high school with. In one way, I think
it's a little bit arrogant to assume
that you're just going to live because
it means you can waste your life. And I
I wholeheartedly stand against that. The
second translation around that that I
think has hurt a lot of people is that
they can do what I would consider
dead-end jobs. And that means jobs that
don't have any direct correlation to
your personal growth. Has nothing to do
with pay. You can work for free and grow
more than anyone else. This is not
saying that you need to go into a season
of earning in your 20s, but you do need
to be setting yourself up for growth. in
my opinion, if you want the big ultimate
outcome. And so most people that at
least consume my stuff, they want to be
better. They want to grow. They want to
get in better shape. They want to have
better relationships. They want to have
a better business. They want to be, you
know, bigger in every way. They want to
expand. If you spend the decade of your
20s not growing and not investing in
your skills and your education, if you
do that in your 30s, you're going to be
further behind than someone who starts
in their 20s. You're going to be a
decade behind. You know, nowadays
there's kids who are starting out the
entrepreneurial journey when they're
like 13. And so when they're 23, they're
Mr. Beast. He's young, but he's actually
pretty old in business terms because a
lot of people start their business
journey in their mid-40s. And so if
they're 50 years old and started their
business 5 years ago, Mr. Beast has
twice the amount of time in the ring
under the bar that they do. For me, I
want to start my time clock on paying
down my ignorance debt as fast as
humanly possible because the debt is a
constant for everyone. All of us are
trying to pay down that debt as fast as
we can. and taking a decade, arguably
one of the most productive decades of
your life, and not paying down that
debt, you just sit in such a deficit
compared to your peer group. Some people
might watch this and be 30 or 40 or 50
and be like, "Well, [ __ ] I took the
wrong advice from the wrong guy." Guess
what? You're going to die. It's not
going to matter anyways. Big deal.
Whatever. The best time to do this was
start when you were 10 and get born to
an entrepreneurial parent who got you in
their small business and invested in all
of your education as a homeschooled
student and taught you all the ways of
the of the Jedi.
But you probably didn't have that. And
so the second best time is to start now
because let's play out the alternative.
How much does it serve you to just say,
I guess I have no chance. Okay, die.
There's nothing left for me to do. I
will relinquish the remainder of my
living days and years because I choose
to lose. And that's a choice. And if you
want that, that's cool. The idea of
quitting simply because you're older,
because you didn't do something.
Everybody doesn't do things that they
know they should be doing now. And
that's because you're always going to
know more in the future than you do in
the past. And so it's a faulty premise
to say that I'm not going to take action
today because I didn't know something in
the past. Everyone doesn't know anything
in the past. But all you can do is take
action with what you know today. And by
taking action, you have learned. And so
you actually take one step to making
your first payment on ignorance debt
through actions, not words. I mean, I
think a lot of people know the story of
the 30-year-old barista. If you love
that, then do it. You know what I mean?
Like I have no judgment on what you do.
If you don't love that and you wish you
were doing something else, that's what I
would say I have a problem with, which
is why are you not doing it? And I think
diving into that, which is usually some
sort of fear, some sort of anxiety, some
sort of label that they believed that
isn't true from someone else, and just
trying to zone in on like why am I not
doing it? And taking two steps closer to
it, not just like because I don't know
what I'm doing. Well, duh. Okay, neither
does anyone. What are you doing about
that? Just defining it to what actions
am I going to take as a result? Just
makes life a lot easier. What does
figured out mean? means that I'm going
to read 2 hours a night on a specific
subject until I feel like I can make a
decision within 30 days on what I'm
going to do. Great. That is something I
can do and I can measure whether I did
it or not.
You have seasons of earning and you have
seasons of learning. I had this kid who
reached out. He was 18 years old. Said
he was going to edit videos for us. When
he came in, he said, "I want $100,000 a
year as an editor as a starting job."
His reasoning was that somebody else had
offered him that amount of money. I want
to make this statement because I think
it's logical and also stupid. If you're
optimizing for your earning potential in
your 20s, you're missing the [ __ ]
point. This individual had the potential
to be on a team that has a massively
globally recognized brand in terms of
media and from there learn how to be way
better than they currently are and then
become a creative director at another
company or at one of my portfolio
companies. like that is the career path
and instead was comparing that to
something that he would make $100,000 a
year and be the only person in the
department and no one there knew
anything about media and so he wasn't
going to learn, he was going to earn.
Whereas somebody who got into the big
leagues and learned 10 times the skill
set then 10 years later is either
starting a multi-million dollar company
or heading up a multi-million dollar
division in a billion dollar company.
and the potential is so much wider
because 10 years from now someone says
what's your experience? It's like well I
I worked at a real estate firm and I
made their social media content. Who
gives a [ __ ] Whereas if you're like I
worked for one of the biggest media
companies out there. Everyone will give
you the job offer. And that is when you
can choose to earn over learn. But
people make the trade too soon because
they compare themselves to people on
social media and think that the 00001%
is the norm. Whenever you choose to earn
rather than learn, you're right hooking
life and saying, "I'm no longer going to
develop and this is good enough." And
so, if a $100,000 a year is actually
good enough for your long-term goals,
then do it. But I would imagine that it
probably isn't for what you really want
to do long term. And I'm using 100, you
know, six figures as a as a placeholder.
It can be whatever number you want. When
you make that decision that you're no
longer going to learn, that's when you
stop growing your potential to learn
more. I say this because that's what I
did. I had a white collar consulting job
for defense contracting. I had a top
secret clearance. I had everything that
looked good on paper. space, cyber
intelligence. I had a two to threeear
path clearly for for getting an MBA at
an Ivy League school and then decided to
drop all of that and start working for
$13 an hour at a gym after I graduated
Magnum Laui in 3 years from Vanderbilt.
I know what I'm asking people to do and
I'm not asking them to do something that
I wasn't willing to do. And I think that
I might have even a more extreme version
that most people are having to live
with. Trying to say like, well, I can't
figure out what I want is a really
paralyzing place to be that I think a
lot of young people are in. is like I
want to find my passion. But the big
misnomer is actually a language issue
which is that people say they want to
find their passion rather than they want
to build it or create it or learn it.
And so like I can promise you that if
you're good at something, you'll like
doing it. And the only way that you get
good at something is by doing things
that you suck at and doing a lot of it.
So let's say you make $50,000 a year. It
cost you $950,000 a year not to know how
to make a million dollar a year. So how
much is that education worth? Answer the
difference. The difference between $1
million and $50,000, which is $950
grand. If you learn how to make a
million dollar, the education is worth
the difference. This is why education
and information are the most valuable
things that we can know. Elon has like
lost everything and then gained it back.
So many of the best entrepreneurs have
stories where they lost it all and then
gained it back. And so, how is it that
they can go to zero, back to a billion,
where somebody starting at zero can't
get there because they didn't lose the
education, they didn't lose the
learning, they had a bad role. And
sometimes in business, you do make bets
on markets and sometimes they don't
shape up, but you didn't lose. And a lot
of times you actually gain in experience
so that the next bet pays off even
bigger. Everyone gets this wrong. The
most expensive thing you ever pay for
isn't your car. It isn't your house. It
isn't your insurance. It's the
information that you don't know but
should. I mean, how many things can you
think of right now that if you knew 10
years ago would have materially changed
your financial outcome, your relational
outcome, your physical outcomes?
probably a lot. What is the value of
that information? Borderline priceless.
And so the idea that we wouldn't invest
in paying down that debt of ignorance
that we owe the universe is just because
we don't know who we're paying the check
to every month for the things that we
don't know that we don't value it
appropriately. The cost of success is
the years of feeling like an idiot for
things that you should have known by
now. All the the decisions that I made
up to this point led me to here. And I
don't regret my life, so I don't regret
not knowing. I mean, if I started over,
I'd be wealthier than I am now. You know
what I mean? I can't go back in time,
but if I could go back in time to talk
to my 20-year-old self, and it wouldn't
change the outcome of my life now,
because I would never roll that dice, is
I would say, "There's two things that
you don't understand that will massively
change your life. You don't understand
brand, and you don't understand
product." Because I was obsessive in my
20s on sales and marketing and what I
would consider fast money. I had fast
feedback loops. So, I would I'd get
better at sales and then I'd immediately
make more sales. I'd get better at
marketing, immediately make more money.
And so I had this very fast feedback
loop that gave me the misinformation or
the false belief that this was the right
path. But I was actually just playing
the wrong game because it's kind of like
in the Matrix when Neo says to Morpheus,
"So you're saying when I'm fast enough,
I'll be able to dodge bullets." And he
said, "No, I'm saying when you're ready,
you won't have to." Me being obsessive
about sales and marketing was me trying
to get faster and faster in the matrix
and not being the one and seeing the
code for what it is, which is that if
you make a product that's good enough,
people will do the marketing and sales
for you. If your brand is strong enough,
people will make the association that
they want to buy your stuff regardless
of how good your copy and your headline
and your landing pages and your
conversion rate optimization and your
media buying are. I kept getting really
good at a game that if I knew how to
master the big things that mattered
would make those skills almost
irrelevant. When $100 million Offers
came out the book, I didn't make it for
anything. I made it for me. And it was
originally intended to be an internal
document. And so I just wanted to make
it exceptional. And what happened once I
released it is what shocked me the most
was that I posted once and I just said,
"Hey, I wrote this book. Hope you guys
like it." And then we sold out in
minutes. And I was like, "That's weird."
The next month more copies sold. And
then the next month more copies sold.
And then the next month more copies
sold. and has continued to sell more
copies month after month after month for
2 years and it's still number one in its
category on Amazon. And that was with
zero paid marketing purely off of people
telling people about the book. And so
when I saw how much leverage that was
that that book sells thousands a day,
not dollars, thousands of copies a day,
I have never marketed anything well
enough to sell a,000 customers a day.
Now mind you, I've always had more
expensive stuff that I've sold, but like
I'd never seen that kind of transaction
volume. And the only way to get that
kind of transaction volume is to have a
huge amount of leverage. The leverage
that product unlocked for me or that
understanding was that if you make it
good enough and I love this saying which
is there's too big to fail and I love
the other one which is too good to fail.
My headline for $100 million offers
makes no sense. No one knows what $100
million offers is and it's just like a
picture of a $100 bill. It's a big
purple book. Like it actually makes no
sense. But the contents of the book were
valuable enough that people were like
just just read it. And they said it so
many times to so many people. And most
people who when I see the comments and I
see the reviews, they say, "I had four
different people in the same month tell
me in different groups that I should
read this book, so I decided to do it
even though it looked hokey and oh my
god, this thing is unbelievable." And
then they tell 20 people or 100 people.
That was when I realized how much
leverage spending more time upfront on
building a better product would unlock
for me. What I used to do was spend two
months building a good product and spend
two years marketing that product with
great marketing rather than spending two
years on a great product and then for
the rest of my life not having to spend
any dollars or effort on marketing so
that it would sell again and again and
again because of the quality of the
product itself. And so that was the
first lesson that my younger self needed
to understand about business. And the
level of detail that it takes to go from
good to great is so much wider than
people think it is. The difference
between an eight and a nine is 10 times
the work. The difference between nine
and nine and a half is 10 times the
work. The difference between nine and a
half and 9.75 is another 10 times the
work. It's so much more effort. And
honestly, when I was younger, I couldn't
even comprehend the amount of work that
I can do now. And for me, that amount of
work is the amount of unbroken focused
time that I can stick with one task. I
did not have that level of focus. I
didn't have a strong enough no muscle. I
didn't know how to turn down other
things that would distract me for long
enough. If you can count in terms of
hundreds, like I can promise you if you
put a,000 hours into something, it'll
probably be pretty good. And most people
spend like a 100 hours on something or I
mean that's [ __ ] Most people spend even
less than time than that. You start a
clock when you start working. You stop a
clock when you stop working. You spend
1,000 hours or 2,000 hours on something.
There's a level of detail because of the
number of exposures you'll get to it.
the crispy details of the product or the
service that can only come from looking
at that thing when it's cold, looking at
thing when it's hot, looking at it when
you're angry, looking at it when you're
sad, looking at it when you're inspired,
looking at it when you're bored. You see
it with different lenses and then what
happens is it just gives you so much
more depth and context to whatever
you're trying to build. That that's the
difference between mediocre products and
excellent products. And it just takes
time. Hey, and real quick, I spent 200
hours this year just making this one
project for you, which is the $100
million scaling roadmap. And I broke up
the stages of business into 10 stages.
And you can identify where you're at by
simply just putting in your business
information. You go to
acquisition.com/roadmap
and it'll spit out this custom report
that tells you what the constraints are
at that current level and what you need
to do to graduate and get to the next
level. This is our gift to you
absolutely free. on the thank you page.
You can book a call with our team and
we'd love to help you uh figure that out
and ideally get past it. In an ocean of
volume, which there's more commoditized
products and services today than ever
before, there's outsized returns to
being number one. It is an even bigger
winner take all market now than it ever
has been because of social media and the
ease of letting other people know about
stuff. If you are truly the best,
everyone will know. And if everyone
knows you are the best, you will have
more demand than you can possibly deal
with. people think that word of mouth is
dead when there's literally never been
an easier way to go viral in a literal
sense from people telling other people
about stuff.
I said the second lesson was brand and
so I had to look at a company or brand
as a learning tool as what are people
going to learn to associate my brand
with the tangible and the intangible
ideas. There are many people that I
associated with when I was younger that
I would never associate with today. Even
though I would say, "Well, I don't act
that way. I don't live my life the way
they live their lives." People would
still make that association. If I did
nothing but talk with porn stars on my
show, people would still make a very
different association with me. And so, I
want to embody certain values that I
want my brand to associate with. And
anything that is not those things by
default detracts from it because it
dilutes the association. Branding is
like curating a garden where pretty much
anything but the flower that you're
trying to grow there is a weed. Even if
it's a daffodil, even if it's a
sunflower, even if the flower itself is
fine, like I said, I have no issues with
porn. I think it's a sunflower,
whatever. But if I'm trying to grow
roses, then anything that's not a rose
doesn't belong. Being so vigilant about
defending that garden of association and
reputation gives you so much leverage.
Because the reason Warren Buffett now
can just do deals that no one else can
do is because his handshake means more
than the US government's. If he says he
will pay, we know he will pay. If he
says he will be there to ensure your
entire city, we know he will. He can do
a deal on a one-page agreement for
billions of dollars because people trust
and they know that his reputation
matters more than anything to him. And
so trust is leverage for deals. It's
leverage for sales. The first experience
I had with having a strong brand was
when we were probably a year year and a
half into gym launch, I launched what
would become Allen, my software project.
And when people heard I had launched a
new thing, the clients that I had were
sending screenshots of their credit
cards to my customer support team
saying, "I don't know what it was, but
if Alex made it, I'll buy it." And so
all of the ideas and the obsessions
around how I was going to market it and
how I was going to position it. The
thing that mattered most was what they
had already received from me and how
much I had delivered on my first
promise. And so when I realized that, I
was like, "All of this sales and
marketing stuff gets you one sale.
delivering exceptional product and
exceptional reputation around your
products gets you every other sale after
that and you will always be able to sell
the next thing provided you delivered on
the first thing and that's where there's
this obsession with marketing because
there's always more people to sell to.
It's a very in my opinion tiring life.
You always have to go get new customers.
If you make sales to get customers
rather than get customers to make sales,
you make the customer the goal and then
you get to keep that relationship and
then next year you still have that
customer. If you got a customer just to
make a sale, you have to go get another
customer to make another sale next year.
But if you make a sale to create the
relationship of the customer, then next
year that customer will buy again and
the new customer will buy. And the third
year you get the first two years and the
third customer. And then that is how you
create a compounding vehicle. And so
both of those things, brand and product,
are actually underlying one concept now
that I'm saying it out loud, which is I
didn't understand compounding. I thought
that it was normal to have to go out,
bang doors, call phones, DM, run ads to
get customers every single month and
that next month I'm going to have to get
another 20 just to keep the lights on
rather than having spent more time on my
reputation and the quality of my product
so that when I sold the first hundred,
they would never leave again. And then
they would send me the next hundred and
I wouldn't have to do anything. And then
I would be able to fend people off and
then I'd be able to raise my prices and
be able to take people on my terms. But
I didn't understand any of that. And
part of that is because I wanted money
so fast. And building a great product
takes longer. Building a great
reputation literally never stops until
the day you die. Leaning into that
lesson, you know, the first book I
launched and I think it did 2 or 4,000
copies sold its first month, something
like that. You know, the second book
that launched 2 years later, sold
250,000 copies in its first month, which
for context, the average New York Times
bestseller sells between 10 and 100,000
in its first 12 months. And we sold 250
in the first month. The only way that
that can happen is if the people who
bought the first book buy the second
book and everybody they tell also buy
and that book still continues to sell at
twice the rate of my first book today.
Here's how to spot friends that are
worth cutting. They only talk about your
past, not your future. So, if you go and
you hang out with your buddies and all
they can really reminisce with you on is
the things that you did together, but
none of them are talking about what
they're going to do or what you're going
to do. For me, that's a telltale sign
that they're living in the past. They're
not even living in the present. Their
best years are behind them. And for most
of us, we want our best years to be
ahead of us. And we want somebody who's
also looking at the same goal as us,
which is growth, which is moving
forward, which is making progress. If
you are a growth oriented individual and
you feel like you're not sure about your
environment or if it's conducive, the
easiest limit test is who talks about
the future and who talks about the past.
Keep the ones who only talk about the
future. Cut the ones talking about the
past. The best thing that I ever did was
not listen to other people's opinions
about my life. They don't want the best
version of you. They want the version of
you who best serves them. Now, when I
first said this, I got flack from a
bunch of parents. They're like, I really
want the best for my kids. I was like,
that's not true. You want a version of
your children who serves what you think
will make you look the best. Family, I
would say more often than not, has a
closer alignment with your long-term
goals than strangers do. And so it makes
sense that family would have more
aligned interests but not completely
aligned interests with you because the
only person who has a completely aligned
interest with you is future you. Keeping
that as the limus test of whose opinion
I'm going to listen to although it's
more difficult has ultimately been very
fruitful for me because if you're
looking at two even two parents you can
disprove that concept by saying okay
well both parents want different things
from me of the things that both parents
want. Which of the things help each of
the parents individually out? Cuz I can
promise you that the thing that one
parent wants doesn't hurt them and help
the other parent. if they disagree, it's
usually something that's more aligned
with their worldview, their beliefs, or
what they will get status from in their
community for you doing. And so, all of
the things I just described have nothing
to do with you. So, why consider it?
I'll say this upfront. I hate why
questions cuz who knows why? But I would
say that I if if I had to make a guess
on why we care about other people's
opinions, it's because we've learned to
care about other people's opinions. And
when we're children, we learn to orient
ourselves to the world through other
people telling us what is what.
Literally, when you're a kid, you point
and then you say, "Well, what's that?"
And then they say this. And so, you have
to listen to other people on the way up.
The problem is at some point you have to
turn it off and say, you know, some of
the people I was listening to had no
idea what they were saying. But you
don't know they have no idea because you
don't have a context or make a judgment.
You have to learn to become human and
then you have to learn to become
yourself. And I think that at that
turning point, you then have to analyze
the beliefs that you've been given and
then keep the ones that you choose. Most
parents are riskaverse rather than
risk-taking for their children. So like
we are willing to take more risk for
ourselves often times than our parents
are willing to take on our behalf. And I
think that's normal. They want to like
keep you alive. There's a lot of
evolutionary drive behind that. And so
they're playing not to lose. But if you
want to play to win, then you have to
take different bets. I think a lot of
younger people get really confused
because they spend a lot of time talking
about ideas and very little talking
doing actions. And so if you just define
the world by only things that occur in
it and not things that occur in your
mind, there's a lot less noise. And so
it becomes easier to see the forest of
the trees. Let's say I have an employee
and I want to hop on a one-on-one and
they said something in a meeting before
and I say, "I think the intention behind
your statement was that you wanted me to
do this and this is how I was feeling
about your statement and this is
probably where you were feeling.
Everything I just said is a complete
waste of time because all I know is that
they said this." And so just focus on
the facts. And if you can do that, it
actually makes living life a lot easier
or navigating life a lot easier. At
least it has for me because those are
the only objective truths. An easy frame
for that is like, would it be admitted
to a court as evidence? You saying you
were offended is not evidence. John said
this to Sally, these words, that's
evidence. Indisputable. And so just look
at the things that are beyond reproach.
Look at the things that are
indisputable. Look at the things that
are facts that are observable. And the
world gets a lot quieter. And you also
realize that most people are full of
[ __ ] and don't know what they're talking
about. I mean, if someone was like,
"Hey, Alex, why did you get into
business?" I could make up an answer. It
just how do we know it's true? Trying to
figure out someone's intention is
[ __ ] If someone asked me, "Why did
you get into business?" I can make up an
answer. Anyone can make up an answer.
Why do you like making money? Why do you
like sales? Why do you like marketing?
Why are you good at this? I can make up
any answer. All I know is that these
things have occurred. And so we can look
at my actions and we can look at the
results. The rest of it of which which
had what influence on what like I can't
relive my life and I can't run the
experiment. And so trying to determine
why like was it because my mom didn't
hug me? Was it because my dad hugged me
too hard? Who knows? I can give anyone
and someone will nod and say great
because we've trained ourselves to say
to answer when someone says why do you
do that? You give them words and they
nod and say oh that's interesting but
like it doesn't mean it's true. And so I
just try and skirt the whole
conversation because there's no point.
So when someone's like, "Well, I'm the
type of person who I'm like, just stop."
Then they start using this label to
decide whether or why they can or can't
do something. I wouldn't be successful
with that cuz I'm a knee freak. Why?
Because you take trash out of your car
regularly. Why does that have anything
to do with whether you could do this or
not? I used to think and told people I
was bad at math until I was 25. Post
college, postconulting job, all of it.
And then I decided that I was not going
to be bad at math. And so I was like,
"Okay, well, I'm not going to use a
calculator." And so then I started
getting better and better at doing math
problems. And then lo and behold, uh
when I took the GMAT, I was like, "Okay,
I have to study twice as hard for the
math section." And I did just as well in
the math section as I did on my verbal.
But my whole life, I had said I was bad
at math. And so I didn't study as hard
because I was bad at it. Everyone who's
listening to this has something they say
about themselves. They're like, "I'm not
organized. I'm an early bird." Right?
Like we have these labels we give
ourselves, but like why do we have these
labels? Like if you needed to wake up
early, you [ __ ] wake up early. If you
need to stay up late, you stay up late.
The labels change our behavior more than
we change the labels. I really abhore
labels overall because I feel like it
limits my action. When I get on podcasts
and I have talks and people try and
label me, you'll probably actively see
me break the label almost every time
because I'm really aware of it. And a
lot of people aren't. And I don't think
people do it on purpose in a bad way. I
just think that they will speak things
over you which is why I hate going home
because no one speaks [ __ ] over you more
than your family and the people who knew
you in high school. Alex has always had
a short temper. You You're a hotthead.
Literally people from home describe me
that way. I was like I don't think I'm a
hotthehead. They will say that and then
I feel like I have to really put up my
mental like defenses to be like this is
not true. Here's the evidence that this
is not true. What would a hotthead do in
these scenarios that is not the way I
behaved therefore right? And I have to I
have to basically unwind that [ __ ]
whenever I go there. And so that is why
I've been an advocate of like if you
want to change your behavior, change
your environment because they're not
going to reinforce labels that you then
also perpetuate in your own mind by the
actions you take as a result. And the
only reason they want a label is because
it's shorthand for other people to
understand, not because it's true. They
just want to say he had a bad childhood.
And so they take your whole life and
they just say bad. That's not true.
There's more nuance to it. I prefer to
think of ideals and think of taking
steps towards those ideals. And since
ideals are not binary of like he is
courageous or he is not courageous, but
how courageous is he or how patient is
he? Not impatient or patient, but how
much. Then I know the values that I want
to embody and then I just take steps
towards those every day with the actions
I take. My success can be boiled down to
elimination of distractions, getting
started, getting better, and never
stopping. Here's how to do that. There's
four steps. Eliminate distractions, get
started, get better, never stop. Number
one, elimination of the things that are
distracting you. When I was young, my
father gave me this advice. Rich people
buy time. Poor people buy stuff.
Ambitious people buy skills. Lazy people
buy distraction. I can give you the
first and easiest 2025 prediction. Look
at what you spend money on. Look at your
calendar. And wherever you invest is
what you will get more of. So many
people are surprised when they look at
their bank account next year and it's
lower than they want it to be. They look
at their accomplishments from that year
and it's not the things they set out to
do. But when you look at their calendar
and their credit card expenses, it's
very obvious why those things didn't
happen. Because we vote with our dollars
about the things that we care about. We
vote about the type of person that we
want to become. And as the first thing
that you can do today for next year is
actually comment below this video. And I
rarely ask for this. The thing that
you're actually going to do today, not
what you're going to begin doing next
year or what your resolution is going to
be. But if it's important enough to do
for future you, it's certainly important
enough to do for current you. Because
current you, by the way, is the only you
that's ever going to enjoy life. I'll
give you this story. So I remember when
I was a few years back, I was walking
with Ila and we went to Sephora, which
is like a makeup store. So, we walked
inside, you know, I'm sitting, you know,
standing there awkwardly cuz I'm like, I
don't know what I'm supposed to do here.
There's this lady with the smock who
like helps out and she had these two
girls who were young. They must have
been maybe well about this this old. I'm
guessing between 9 and 40, who knows?
She's leaning over and she has these two
paint brushes in her hands and she says,
"Okay, girls, now that you guys are
women, you need to start budgeting for
this stuff because you're going to be
spending money on this every single
month to do your makeup." And so, the
girls grabbed them. They were super
excited and they went to go check out.
And I saw that exchange as actually a
really beautiful lesson when it comes to
identity. Our priorities we dictate by
what we spend, not by what we say. These
girls, because they wanted to step into
this new identity, had to match it with
new priorities. So they had money or
they had saved up their shekels or
whatever they do for chores or
babysitting or whatever. By doing that,
they had to start prioritizing some of
that money towards their new identity
from girls to women. But the thing is is
that many people who want to start next
year think okay well I'm just going to
see if this happens. But it doesn't work
that way. You have to basically make the
decision that this is the type of person
that I want to become. And then these
are the actions that that type of person
would take and then we align our
calendars and our budgets in accordance
with that so that the investments we
make yield the results that we want. But
the thing is is that people want to say,
"Hey, wouldn't it be great if I owned
Apple?" But they never buy the stock. If
you want to be that version of you, you
need to start buying stock in that
today. Both by paying in time and paying
in money to vote with your dollars about
what you truly care about. And the
reason that I'm hitting this so hard is
that it's never been easier than it is
today to be successful. It's also never
been easier to be distracted. So along
the theme of investing in the things
that matter most, the first thing we do
is we eliminate all the stuff that
sucks. I define commitment as the
elimination of alternatives. If you get
married, you eliminate all people of
whatever sex you're married to that are
not that person. Actually, you eliminate
everyone who's not that person
independent of sex, right? That is a
commitment, right? If you enter into a
uh partnership and you say, "I'm not
going to do any business besides this
business as part of the terms," then
you've eliminated all alternatives. And
so, if you want someone to commit, ask
them to eliminate everything else that's
not the main thing. These are all the
things, a laundry list of things that
are probably not your main thing that
very likely are getting in the way. And
these are the most common things that I
see in my DMs, that I see in my comments
from people who are not getting where
they want to go as fast as they'd like
to get there. First big category is bad
friends. So if you want better friends,
get used to seeing them less. Better
friends are busy friends. So I remember
when I started working more and some of
the friends that I had were a little bit
more ambitious, I started realizing that
the people that I liked the most, I
actually didn't spend as much time with.
and the people that were always
available were the ones that I didn't
want to become more like. Here's five
questions you should consider when
thinking about whether to keep a friend
in your life or cut them. Question
number one is, if someone told you that
you're a lot like your friend, would you
take that as a compliment? Second, are
you truly fulfilled by the friendship or
is it just someone to keep you from
being lonely? Third, are you able to be
unapologetically yourself or do you feel
the need to act differently to please
that friend or to be around that friend?
Fourth, do you like who this friend is
right now today or do you like the idea
of the friend and who they could be
someday? And then finally, five, would
you want your future or imagined child
to be friends with someone like this
person? And I think it's a really
wonderful lipmus test because it forces
you to take a look outside of yourself
in order to have perspective from a
third-party angle on the true quality of
that person. But the reality is that
rare people are by definition rare. It's
normal to have fewer of them. And so if
you only have a few friends or one good
friend, then that's normal if you want
rare and exceptional friends. If you
have many friends, it's far more likely
that the bar for your friendship is too
low. And to give you a filter that I
actually used for the most important
friend in my life, Leila, I like to
think, does this person have the same
scale of goals that I have? So, it
doesn't mean that they have to have the
same goals as you, but it has to be the
same level of goals as you because at
least you're going in the same
direction. So, that's number one. Number
two is, do they have the same level of
dedication and commitment to those
goals? Because I don't know about you,
but I had plenty of friends who were
like, I want to be an NFL player. I want
to be a really rich tech entrepreneur. I
want to be a a touring musician, right?
And they had these goals, but I'm like,
dude, I see you just playing Fortnite 4
hours a day and you you practice guitar
once a week. Like, what do you really
want that or do you just like saying it
because it makes you feel good? And so,
I wanted people who walked the walk. And
I wanted people who would keep up with
my pace. And if you are someone who's
ambitious, and this is me just talking
specifically to you, because there's
only a few people who are watching this
who really are, and you'll know that if
it's you, you have to get used to being
alone because there are seasons where
you'll basically transition from one
group of friends into another. And it's
not even a group of you'll usually
transition from a group of friends into
no friends. And then you'll find one or
two people who are at a new level. And
then sometimes those people introduce
you to some of their friends. And if you
keep walking and you keep outpacing,
then that group will then start retiring
past you. and then maybe one person
stays with you, maybe no one does, and
you'll have another lonely period. I'm
saying this because I used to think that
there was something wrong with me when
in reality I just didn't understand what
the nature of being exceptional meant.
And so I'm saying this purely from a
definitional perspective. To be
exceptional means that you are the
exception. It means that you are not
normal. And so it's normal for normal
people to find you abnormal if you do
things that are not normal. Don't let
people who have mediocre goals deter you
from taking actions that make you great
because it makes you different.
Realizing that I thought most people
actually made no sense. They say they
had these goals, but they took no
action. And they called me work
obsessed. They would tell me I should
take time off and they're like, "Hey,
you're not you're not you're not as cool
anymore. You're not you're not hanging
out with the boys. It's like why aren't
you participating in the fantasy league?
Why aren't you watching football on
Sunday with us? And for me, I actually
used to love watching football uh with
my friends. It was actually one of my
biggest things that I look forward to.
But the thing is is that like I needed
that Sunday cuz I had to prep workouts.
I had to prep the music list for the
next day. I had to run billing. I had to
do all this other work. And the thing is
is that like I looked at that football
game and I was like my goals are more
important to me than this. And so I
think that a lot of people don't
actually look at themselves in the
mirror and say like one year from today
will I will I remember this football
game or will I remember the fact that
I'm not where I said I wanted to be. And
to me that was significantly more
painful. Now this is an uncomfortable
fact for a lot of people. Your ability
to delay gratification is actually a
function of intelligence. And so your
ability to learn at a longer and longer
delay is something that comes I mean
we're talking from primates all the way
up. And so basically if you want to
teach a monkey how to do something you
have to say hey do this thing and then
immediately give them a reward. And the
longer that period goes on the less
trainable they are. The sign of
intelligence is that you can actually
expand the reinforcement window and they
can still abstract it back to the
original action. If you want to practice
intelligence, then being able to
actively delay your need for a result or
reward from the work you do will make
you a more intelligent person because
your rate of learning will actually
increase despite the fact that your
reward rate will decrease in the short
term. And so to give you full
transparency on what 2025 might look
like if you accomplish your goals at the
end, you might have a different friend
group or no friends at all for a season
because you don't become like the people
you admire. You become like the people
you want to impress. Harvard made this,
you know, wonderful study years ago
about the best predictor of someone's
long-term material success was what they
called their reference group. Now, this
has been misqued in places by the five
people you spend the most time with, but
it's actually the five people you
compare yourself to, and that's a very
big difference. Now, I want to take it a
step further because I think to myself,
what are the things that affect our
behavior? And so, it's really about the
people that you want to impress, not
necessarily even who you compare
yourself to, because it's the people
whose voices you hear when you're about
to make a big life decision. And so when
you make a big life decision, you don't
listen to the people closest to you. You
should listen to the people closest to
your goals. And some of them may not be
in your neighborhood or your city or
your state or your high school or your
college. They might just be people you
follow on the internet. And you have to
abstract what would that person think
about this decision? Not my mom, not my
homie, not my uncle, or that person at
church. And so I think this is a great
transition of thinking through instead
of necessarily even having mentors,
having heroes and transposing what you
think their decision-making calculus
would be onto your life. And so it's
interesting is that I will have
conversations with entrepreneurs and
they'll say, "Hey, here's my current
condition. This is my desired state.
This is what I perceive my obstacle to
be." And I say, "Okay, well, what do you
think?" And they're like, "Well, I think
you're going to say I should do X, Y,
and Z." And I'm like, "You're right. Why
aren't you?" They're like, "Well," and
the thing is is that basically what they
answer with after that well is in
essence other people's opinion who
aren't at the place they want to be.
Here's the the uncomfortable truth,
which is that winners focus on winning.
Losers focus on winners. And you never
receive hate from above, always below,
because winners have their eyes on the
goal, not on other people. And so, you
have to decide whether you want to be a
loser or a winner. And I'm just being
real with you. What this looks like in
reality and maybe for you in 2025 will
be like this. First, you look like an
idiot to everyone else while you try to
figure it out. Then everyone else looks
like an idiot for ever doubting you.
Seasons. And so, everyone takes a
different amount of years to stop giving
a [ __ ] about what everyone else thinks.
And if you're going to get there
eventually, you might as well start
today and enjoy the benefits longer. So,
if I'm 85 years old, I think about what
that man cares about. And that man cares
about very, very little. All you have to
do is talk to an elderly person or a
grandparent and be like, what do you
think about this? A lot of like, ah, who
cares? Like, it doesn't matter. Life is
literally too short. They literally
don't have time for it. And so I think
to myself, if that's the ultimate
version of me, if I'm going to get there
eventually, and that's what the wisest
people think after having the most life
experience, then why would I not try to
cheat code that into today and then not
have to go looking back from 85 and
think, man, I wish I knew then what I
know now. Look forward to 85year-old
self and say, I am going to choose to
learn the lesson I know I'm going to
learn and act as if I knew it today.
Because the difference between them and
you is that what they consider work, you
consider life. And so you have to accept
that you have a fundamental different
understanding of how life works. And I
believe that is a more accurate view of
reality. The reason that the rich can
get richer is because they see the world
differently than the poor. And so it
makes sense that if your poor friends
don't see what you see, that they see
through the lens of poverty. And all my
goal in life is to be able to see
reality more accurately. And so in the
beginning, you have to develop this
armor, this thick skin around people
saying those little snide comments of
like, you work too hard, you're too
obsessed, you have a toxic work
capacity, and why are you working
weekends? Why are you working late
nights? You're you're not like this is
not worth it. They're not paying you
enough for the work that you do. All of
these different things. Because
eventually that armor on the outside
actually just becomes one with you. And
you don't even hear it anymore because I
can promise you that those people who
were in my life decades ago. They're
just not even I don't hear those those
claims anymore for two reasons. One,
because my reality changed so
drastically that they couldn't say
anything. And secondarily, they're just
not in my world anymore. I was only able
to get here because what they deemed
acceptable, I deemed intolerable. how
far you go in life. I truly believe this
is based and predicated only on one
thing which is your actual standard. And
so I believe that the person who runs
any company or runs any division should
be the person who has the highest
standards. And if there's ever a day
that someone has a higher standard for
acquisition.com than me, they should run
this instead of me because they would be
the one who's best serving the company.
And so the person who should have the
highest standard for you is you. And so
it makes sense that they have a lower
bar, but why would I listen to their bar
on my life? I think that that standard
is the one thing that rich kids get from
rich parents more than anything else is
because they have an expectation of
life. They don't accept opportunities
that are below that standard. And so
they actually get their huge leg up on
the pick on the vehicles that they
choose to pursue. And so one of the
tougher parts if you're not from an area
where people make a lot of money or not
from you don't know anybody who's a you
know super successful entrepreneur is
that you basically have to borrow
someone else's measuring stick and you
have to say is this the standard that
Elon would pursue? Is this the standard
Bezos would pursue? Is this the standard
Jobs would pursue? And if it isn't then
why are you doing it? If you want to be
like them then act like them. If you
want to be like your friends, then you
can act like your friends, but don't be
surprised that you have what they have
or lack what they lack. If we're
thinking about elimination, we're
eliminating bad friends and tangentially
their opinions about you that are
affecting your behavior. So the next
thing are what things are playing
interference on your time and your
attention. All right. So I would say
opinions of other people are affecting
your behavior and your decisions. I
think that your environment affects your
efficiency of behavior. So think about
how much more you get per hour of
output. If you can't sit still, ignore
notifications, and focus on one task for
eight hours straight. Never expect to
build anything great. And as
uncomfortable as that is, it's also the
truth. Like I I don't know a single
incredibly successful entrepreneur that
can't sit down and have hyperfocused
periods of time, sometimes weekends,
weeks at a time, where they don't talk
to anyone and they just hammer away. And
it's whether they're coding for software
or they're making some insane marketing
campaign and all the email follow-ups
and all the text follow-ups and and the
affiliate uh you know promotions and
incentives or someone who's creating a
product that they're designing and
they're in the shop and they keep
tweaking at it. Or they're somebody
who's who's hypers scaling a company and
saying I'm going to sit in 20 interviews
a day for for seven days straight so I
can hire 20 people this week because I
need to get going. Right? Like if you
can't sit still and ignore notifications
and focus for a day, nothing great will
get accomplished because it's not about
what you want, it's about what's
required. And it's and whether that's
your best or not is irrelevant. It's
just there's a price tag and you got to
be willing to pay for it or you don't
get the thing. And a lot of times it's
not what you want. And I I I I spend a
lot of time trying to dispel the concept
of like follow your passion because I
think it leads more people astray than
it helps because it's very easy for
someone who's successful who's already
delegated tons of things to only then
focus on their area of genius and then
say here for my seat do what I do. But
there's a very big difference between
doing what someone does and doing what
they did to get there. And I think this
is what's lost in a lot of the content
that I see in the entrepreneurial space.
And to be clear, whenever I'm trying to
get to the next level, I often have to
take on things that I don't know how to
do and I have to learn how to do them,
which means I have to suck for a period
of time. And sucking sucks. But the
thing is is you have to be able to
embrace that period of time and say like
this is the cost of greatness. And so
I'll give you something very tactical.
So I have timers in a lot of my offices
and my team has adopted this too, which
is I like to time block, which is
essentially saying how long do I think
this is going to take? And you can do
this on a week scale, you can do it on a
daily level. It depends on the level of
project you're tackling. But for me,
even on the most micro level, I say,
"Okay, how long should this take?" I'll
then crank this thing. Boop. I think
this should take 20 minutes. And then I
hit start and I let the timer go. And if
for whatever reason something distracts
me, I pause it so that I know that I
didn't actually work that period of
time. And so what happens is it will
give you a very real look at how long
you're actually working versus how long
you think you're working. and you tell
other people working and you Instagram
how long you're working. And as I've
become more efficient at work, meaning
my output per unit of time has gone up,
I've realized that there's just been a
significant decrease in the distractions
that I allow to interrupt me. Again, if
you want to stay focused, staying
focused is not like zeroing in and
saying, "I'm going to do it just like
I'm going to I'm going to I'm going to
just zoom in on this thing." It's more
that focus occurs when you remove
everything else. what's left is focus.
And so Jerry Seinfeld has this uh this
famous process that he talks about with
writing and I think writers are also
wonderful people for talking to for deep
work because it's the nature of the work
they do. One of the things that he did
and he has done for years for his
standup so he can script it out is that
he locks himself in a room that has no
windows and has nothing but a yellow
notepad and a pen. And he tells himself
that he has to go in that room and he
doesn't have to write but he can't do
anything else. And so what ends up
happening is that writing occurs as a
default. And so focus kind of works the
same way. You eliminate everything else
by to create focus. You don't try and
push harder while also having these
disruptions. So there's three easy ways
that I make my phone less distracting.
The first is I switch it to grayscale.
And so grayscale decreases consumption
across all people by 30%ish. And that's
researchbacked. It's pretty cool. The
second thing is turning off all
notifications across all apps on your
phone because you never want your app to
be dictating when it's convenient for
the app to disrupt you. Like, how
ridiculous is that? But we let apps have
that permission. Most phones and people
want to push notifications to you. I
want to pull them when it's convenient
for me. The third thing is other people.
And so I have a mode on my phone where
no one can get through. And when I do
that, then I can reach out to them when
it's convenient for me. Because if it's
actually an emergency, call 911. And if
it's not a true emergency, then it can
wait. And my team wanted to remind me
that I don't email. I heard in uh I
think it was like 2016 that Bill Clinton
didn't use email. And I was like, if
he's the president, he doesn't use
email, I cannot use email. And so uh my
team doesn't contact me via email. And
so if you can eliminate entire channels,
that's also an easier way to concentrate
uh fewer flows of communication. And
here's the thing, it's always harder,
takes longer, and costs more than you
think it will. That is a reflection of
poor expectations, not that that reality
is bad. And so it makes sense that it
would be harder, take longer, and cost
more. Because if it didn't, then
everyone would have it, and everyone had
it, then it wouldn't be worthwhile. And
so literally the difficulty of the task
that you embark on is proportional to
the reward that you ultimately get
because you are the asset that you build
more than the achievement. And so if
it's hard, that's amazing because it
will make you that much harder once you
conquer it. And it will also make it
harder for anybody else who wants to
follow in your footsteps. And so the
higher up the mountain you climb, the
thinner the air gets and the rarer the
climber or explorer must be in order to
get there. And so, I don't know about
you, but I would so much rather climb a
mountain that so few people have been
able to climb so that I can see a view
that other people haven't seen. And so,
speaking of expectations, let me talk
about the worst expectation of all,
which is entitlement, which is the
expectation of life or other people to
give you something without earning it.
And I think that this is is a is a virus
in today's culture right now. And so,
there's the famous quote, "Hard times
create strong men. Strong men create
good times. Good times create weak men
and weak men create hard times. It makes
sense that right now we have a lot of
weak men because it's been pretty good
times. The good news about that is that
it's so easy to beat them. You just have
to show up, be on time, prepare the
night before, remembers people's names,
actually follow up when you say you were
going to, and try like you mean it
rather than trying like you want to get
credit for trying. And I see this is
this this thing that's that that's
pervasive right now is that people will
comment or they'll DM me and they're
like, "Hey, I'm trying really hard." As
though I'm supposed to give them credit
for trying. The world doesn't work that
way. It gives you credit for achieving.
And the reason that you want credit for
trying is because you want it to cost
less, take shorter time period, and be
easier. And so if you restate your
complaint about the difficulty as, "Oh,
I have false expectations about the ease
or the price tag of this goal." Then all
of a sudden you realize that the only
real problem was that you expected it to
cost less. It's like going to the store
and being like, "Oh, I've got these
Jordans that I really want to buy. I got
$50. I'm so excited to buy them." You go
to the store and see that they're $300.
At that point, you can just say,
"Jordans aren't for me." Or you can say,
"Oh, I will have to keep working and
keep saving so that I can afford this."
And so it's a lot about affording the
goals that you want to achieve and a lot
of things that we have to spend in order
to get them is the time and the
rejection of not achieving what we want
on the timeline we originally thought.
Like what makes success hard is that the
expectation that society puts because we
only see the highlight reel. You
actually only see people after they
finish the race. People think success is
like watching a marathon, not running a
marathon. When you watch a marathon, you
look at the beginning and you look at
the end. It only takes you a couple of
seconds to see both of those. But
running a marathon is four, five, six
straight hours of breathing heavy,
wondering when it's going to end,
counting, starting to play games in your
mind of like, okay, I'm I'm 2/ird of the
way there. I'm two two more quarters of
that. I'm only one of the of 1/8 of the
way there. And you keep doing this to
play tricks on your mind to keep going.
But the thing is is that in a mile
marker race, it's very clear to know how
you're going to get to the finish line
and how long it's going to take. The
only difference with success is that you
just have to keep running and you don't
know where the finish line is. And
people will only cheer you on at that
finish line that they don't know where
it is either, which means you have to
get used to running alone. And so the
difficulty is you have to start running
and you have to keep running, but you
just don't know whether you're running
for a mile or 300. And so this is where
the pacing is important. So a lot of
people will run really hard. They'll
they'll think because they only saw the
beginning of the marathon on TV and the
finish of the marathon on TV that they
can just sprint because both of those
clips only lasted a couple of seconds.
So, they start their marathon of success
of whatever it is they're going after by
sprinting as hard as they can and then
they realize that there's no one around
and there's just a bunch of open road
ahead of them and they're like, "How
long is this going to take?" And that's
when reality sets in. And so, I make
these videos to say that a lot of times
it's going to take longer. So, one of
the big nasty things that you have to
eliminate on this path is the identity
that you have about yourself, the isms
that you claim. And so, for example,
like, oh, I'm a I'm a neat freak. I'm a
I'm not good at math. I'm not techy. And
so, you make these statements and they
don't serve you. Fundamentally, you
should have one razor that rules all
decisions. And I this is this is pretty
cruel, but it's also the reality of the
world, which is does this thing person
belief make it more or less likely that
I hit my goals? And so if you run every
single thing you do, the actions you
take, the people you hang out with, you
having your phone in the room, you
saying I'm not techy, does this increase
or decrease the likelihood that you hit
your goals? And I'm not saying this to
preach cuz I had one that I dealt with
for a long time. So I always considered
myself to be bad at math. I remember I
was decent at math and then in nth grade
I had a really bad teacher and it
basically put me back a year. Basically
after algebra I didn't really learn
anything because the year after that I
didn't have the the foundations from the
year before. The difficulty was I kept
saying after that point I'm just not
good at math. But when I was in my 20s I
made the decision that that didn't serve
me anymore. And so I was like okay well
what would I have to do to feel like I
was good at math? And I was like, well,
people who like can do math in their
head. I think that's a pretty cool
thing. And so I didn't use a calculator
for anything for years. And then I
learned I mean, I made a lot of mistakes
in the beginning, but then I got better
and better at doing math in my head. And
I would check it obviously after I was
done, but I always let my head try and
do it first. And so nowadays, if you
were to ask people, man, is Alex good at
math? They're like, dude, he just
rattles off numbers like crazy. But the
thing is is that until I was in my 20s,
I thought I was bad at math. And so it's
like we are so much more pliable than we
think we are. And we had something that
set us on a trajectory a little bit
earlier in life that just gave us maybe
a little bit of disadvantage. Fine,
because you just have to get over it.
Everyone's childhood was difficult. And
if you want to win the award for hardest
childhood, congrats, you win. You feel
better, right? No one cares about what
happened to you then. Only what you can
make happen now. Identity is a lie. We
only describe people about who they are
by what they do. Doing is being. And so
if you want to be somehow different, you
have to do different things. And then
only afterwards will people describe you
based on the actions you take. Think
about back in the day, the actual names
people had was he's John the Carpenter,
he's John the Stonesmith, he's John the
Mason, right? People literally had their
names based on what they did. That
hasn't changed. The first thing you do
when you meet somebody is you find out
what do what do you do? And that that
gives you indications. And if you want
to describe who someone is, what do you
say? You describe what they do. And so
this means that our identity is 100%
under our control because we control
what we do. And then only after the fact
will other people describe you in that
way. So we covered environmental things
like with the phone and having a timer.
We covered interpersonal things in terms
of our identity and voting with the our
dollars and time about the things that
we care about. We eliminated the bad
people and their opinions about us that
affect our behavior. And so we've
eliminated all these things. So now
we've made room to get started. And the
good news is you only need three things
to win. The balls to start, the brains
to learn, and the heart to never give
up. And the best thing is you already
have all three. And for the girls, you
have gonads. So it's fine. it still
counts. And so my ask of you is to make
the commitment. Now this is again the
elimination of alternatives, to make the
commitment to never stop. And so it
doesn't mean that I'm asking you to
commit to be successful. I'm asking you
to commit to keep running, to keep
walking the marathon. Even if you have
to pant and you have to slow down, you
just can't stop. And so the best way to
hit next year's goals is to not wait
until next year to work on them. Is to
start now. Because I'll tell you this,
if you feel like you need a special
occasion to begin making your life
better, then it assumes that a special
occasion must always be there for you to
want to improve yourself. It shows that
you don't think today is worth
improving. And so that means that you
typically will always cast forward when
you think things are worth improving.
And so the easiest way to vote with your
action is to make today the only day
that is good because it's the only day
you have control over. My hot take,
which shouldn't be, is you don't have to
wait until January 1st to better
yourself. And I'm purposely posting this
before the year ends because I think
it's stupid to wait. Like why would you
wait on getting better? Why would you
like if you had a lottery ticket, why
would you wait to cash it in? You would
cash it in as fast as humanly possible.
And that lottery ticket is the life that
you want on the other side of this. Why
would you wait? Here's a harsh truth.
You're young. You've got time. False.
All that lie does is extend how long it
takes people to realize tomorrow isn't
guaranteed. Nothing is going to be easy.
Get over it. It takes time to get good.
And the sooner you start, the sooner you
act. And the sooner you act, the sooner
you get. And don't stop until you do.
And as harsh as that sounds, I do have
good news. It only takes 20 hours of
focused effort to get decent at
anything. The problem is people wait
years before they start their first
hour. So many of you could probably
start achieving next year goals before
the end of this year. 20 hours is not
that long. If you're like, man, I really
want to learn ads. I really want to
learn how to make content. I really want
to learn how to edit videos. I really
want to learn how to sell. You can do
that now. And you can have that skill.
like we can onboard a new sales guy in
in in a few days. There's this massive
delay that people think because of the
unknown. They don't know what is going
to happen and so they therefore assume
that it's bad. And so the reality is
that most people don't like surprises
even if they're good ones. Have you ever
heard people like, "Oh, I don't like
surprise parties." It's a [ __ ] party.
Why would you hate a surprise party
that's in your favor? You hate it
because you don't like the unknown. And
so it's a really good thing to test for
yourself, which is why would I hate a
good surprise? You hate it because
there's a possibility that the surprise
is negative. But on a long time horizon,
you know, 85year-old you isn't even
going to remember it to begin with. This
is a this is going to be a weird one for
you, but just stay with me. If you've
ever been so drunk that you're throwing
up and you think to yourself, "Man, I'm
probably not going to remember this."
The good news is is that once you do
succeed, that terrible period of
vomiting or whatever the difficulty is
that you're going through, it'll
actually compress in your mind. And so,
as difficult as it may seem in the
moment, it actually doesn't stay with
you. All you'll have left is the thing
you accomplished, you won't remember the
work that it took to get there. There'll
be a significant discount on the
punishment you endured. I tend to have a
bad habit of really not looking back
very much. And so I occasionally will go
through my photos and I am reminded
about all of the mistakes and the
detours that I took along the way to
where I wanted to go. And I'll tell you
the story that my father told me when I
was uh very impatient. He said, "Listen,
you think that this is taking too long
for you to be successful?" He said, "Do
you know how long it took me to become a
doctor?" And I was like, "No." He's
like, "Well, so my father's a run-in,
and he left the country to get educated,
and there was a program for anybody
who's a run-in that the government would
pay for your schooling as long as you
came back with the education." Now, the
revolution occurred during the time he
was away. So, he actually never got to
go back. He went to uh France, Paris, to
try and enter medical school. Only
problem, he didn't speak French. And so
he's trying to do premed in another
language as somebody who doesn't even
share the same alphabet. And so he
failed that year. He then took a the
second year he tried again because
you're allowed in in in France. It's a
different system. You could just
basically try as many times as you want.
He started again and the second year he
failed again and then he talked to his
brother and he's like, "I don't know if
being a doctor is for me. Like I just
feel like imagine this like failing two
full years in a row." and his brother
said, "Hey, why don't you go to Belgium?
You know, change the environment, you
know, different different school,
different people. Go there." So, he went
to Belgium and then his third try, he
made it past his first year. Now, mind
you, at this point, he had two years of
learning French and so he was able to
finally actually understand what the
professor was saying. So, was it that he
wasn't smart enough to understand how to
become a doctor or was it that he just
had other skills that he lacked along
the way? And so a lot of people right
now are judging the fact that they
didn't succeed because they somehow
think it's some innate trait. I'm not
smart enough. I'm not good enough. But
sometimes you just lack some
prerequisite skills, right? Like if
you're like trying to learn calculus and
you've never done arithmetic before,
it's going to be really hard, right?
Dare I say impossible. And so if you
jump straight into calculus, you're not
going to win. So sometimes you have to
take two steps back in order to build
the foundation to get forward. Now, I'm
going to keep the story going. So he
then graduates in uh you know seven
years because how long it takes the
actual medical school system is
different in in in in uh in Europe. They
actually do college and the the next
degree all is one thing. So 7 years
later he graduates. Okay. Then he's this
Iranian dude can't go back to his own
country. Meets a girl in Belgium. She
says I'm from the US. And so he comes
back to the US with the lady who would
eventually become my mother. And when
he's in the US, he then his doctor, his
his MD doesn't apply here. So he then
has to basically do it again in the
United States. And in order to do this,
you have to get a residency. Now,
getting a residency as someone who's a
foreigner back then was pretty tough.
And so it took him two years where he
had to basically work minimum wage jobs.
He was like uh he had to like run slides
like radiology slides back and forth as
like a runner, a courier. when he was a
full surgeon, but he couldn't do it here
in the US. And so imagine how
emasculineating it is, right? Where your
wife comes back, she's able, she was a
US citizen and had all this other stuff,
right? And she could, she got her
internship immediately because uh she
was US and she was a girl, whatever. And
my father didn't. And so he then had to
do two more years where he didn't have
progress. So he he told me the whole
story and then eventually obviously he
got the he got the residency and then he
was able to get in the path. But if you
look at that, he basically had four or
five years of his life where there was
basically no net gain in progress
towards his goals. And so he's telling
me this story when he's 50 and he's
like, "Look at my life now." He's like,
"No one knows." He's like, "No one asks
me how long it took. They just know what
I have now and what I can do now." And
so you have this idea that it's that it
should take a certain period of time. It
it should only last this long. It should
be this level of difficulty. But the
thing is is just that that level of
perseverance when he decided to go out
on his own and start his own practice
rather than and and left the practice
that he was working in he then didn't
know anyone and he still had a heavy
accent was a new guy in a new area and
it took him time to build up. And what
did he do? My dad learned how to be a
general contractor. He built his own
surgical center because he couldn't
afford having these outsourced third
parties that charge $250,000 to build a
surgery center. He built his his for a
fraction of that. And so as my dad going
to Home Depot, measuring and figuring
these things out as a full plastic
surgeon, it's not about the resources
you have. It's about how resourceful
you're willing to be right now. Getting
started is 100% under your control. And
I love taking this frame, which is that
every self-made billionaire is
self-made. Now, if you're like, wait,
there are billionaires who aren't
self-made, right? That's why I didn't
say all billionaires. Every self-made
billionaire is self-made. And every
self-made millionaire is self-made. And
here's the one people hate. Every
self-made person in poverty is
self-made. Now, that may make you feel
uncomfortable. And you know what? You
may be right. You probably did have more
disadvantages. You probably did have
things that worked against you. And now
what? You're right. So that's it then
for you. The rest of your life will
never go the way you want it to go. The
harsh truth here is if you want to feel
better, blame others. If you want to get
better, blame yourself. And so my father
told me that story multiple times in my
life, as I'm sure your fathers have told
you stories multiple times in your life,
or you had a parent or an uncle or a
brother, and they told you those big
meaningful stories. And so I'll tell you
another time he told me it. So after I
lost everything for the second time,
think about like I tell the story, but
it's very easy to gloss over, but think
about this. I had left my job, went to a
new area, didn't know anyone, started a
gym, didn't have enough money to have an
apartment, slept at my gym, just
grassroots got it going, made the gym
successful by working there every hour
of the day. Was finally successful
enough to be able to open a second
location, a third, a fourth, a fifth, a
sixth. finally feel like I I tasted the
success, like I'm actually doing
something. I'm actually pretty good
here. Like that bet that I made actually
paid off and then I lose it all. And so
I I I sell all those locations. I put
the money in a new thing and then it's
gone. And so I could look back and say,
"Wow, I just spent all those years and I
actually have nothing to show for it.
The only thing I would have had to show
was the money that I made." But my
father retold me that story and he said
it was never about the amount of
failures failures he had. It was about
the education that he had. And so one of
the other repeated fatherisms that he
gave me was that education is the only
thing that no one can take from you. The
skills you have, the skills you acquire
along the way are the only thing that
are truly yours. There's nothing else in
this world that actually belongs to you.
Your your clothes can get stolen. the
belongings you have. And he said this
from a place of reality, which is my
family came from a country that took all
of our assets. They seized everything.
They seized land. They seized homes.
They seized wealth. They just said, "Oh
yeah, all that that's ours now. Good
luck." This may not be as real for
people in the United States. But having
people who everyone in my family had
everything taken from them that is very
evident in how they talked to me and how
I've always seen the world as these
things are ephemeral these material
goods the studio the setup the lights
the whatever the platforms
like gone but the thing is is that my
father came here with $1,000 because of
the revolution and had nothing and built
the life he has and you can lose it all
and gain it back. And so we've seen so
many entrepreneurs who've actually lived
through this cycle. It's actually a
common thing in entrepreneurship. And
it's because you have to understand and
respect risk. The beauty of it is that
after you fail, the likelihood that
you're successful goes up, not down.
This is the part that people miss. They
fail and think it somehow decreases the
likelihood of success, but it actually
increases it. And so it's like you want
to just get the failures out of the way.
Why would you not want something that
increases the likelihood at your goal?
And the reason that it increases that
likelihood is that failure
is a requisite
probability for taking action. And so
anyone who has failed has taken more
action than someone who's done nothing.
Which means it increases the likelihood
that they are successful. And so when
you fail, you get feedback. And when you
get feedback, you get better. And when
you get better, it increases the
likelihood you win. Losers
stay losers by never being willing to
lose.
Everyone loses before they win. And so
there's this great moment in the Matrix,
which is the the famous jump where Neo
is trying to jump across the buildings
and everyone's gathered around because
they think he's the one. He obviously
takes the jump and he falls and they're
like, "Ah, what does it mean? What does
it mean?" And Cipher, who ended up
eventually being the Judas of this,
says, "Everybody falls the first time."
And so even the one or the person who
was going to become the one was somebody
who had to fail first. And I love that
because everyone falls the first time.
Your first business is very unlikely to
be your last business. The first product
you have will be a product that you'll
be embarrassed of years from now. But
what's important is having the product,
getting the product, building the
product, launching the product, shooting
the shot. And so if you're never willing
to lose, you're never going to win. So,
in 2025, if you start a podcast or you
start making content, you start doing
cold outbound or you you you you take a
new job, whatever it is, just remember
that your second try after you fail,
which you inevitably will, takes twice
the emotional effort, but half the
actual effort. So, you'll fail and
you'll emotionally feel bad. But guess
what you did? You actually gripped your
hands on the unknown and you go from
unknown optimism to known pessimism. So
it's like okay now I know what it takes
I now have realistic expectations what
is required in order to be successful
and although it may be bigger than I
originally thought I now can quantify
what is required to win and so here's
the thing the best entrepreneurs in the
world have the biggest failure resumes
and so I don't even want you to win I
want you to build your failure resume
and so if you're like oh it must be easy
for you to say I lost money on my first
two real estate deals I ever did. Almost
lost all the money I put in. I've lost
money on crypto when I put it in years
ago. I lost money on uh bad hires. I've
lost millions in bad hires, actual hard
costs, not soft costs. I've had six
failed businesses. I've had nine failed
partnerships. And so I bring these
things up because like you're not going
to hit it out of the park on the first
shot. But the crazy thing about how
success works is that you only need to
win once. That's the crazy part is you
only have to win once. I'll read you
this quote from Jeff Bezos, which is
what I started my first book, $100
million Offers, with. We all know that
if you swing for the fences, you're
going to strike out a lot, but you're
also going to hit some home runs. The
difference between baseball and
business, however, is that baseball has
a truncated outcome distribution. When
you swing, no matter how well you
connect with the ball, the most runs you
can hit is four. In business, every once
in a while, when you step up to the
plate, you can score 1,000 runs. This
longtail distribution of returns is why
it's important to be bold. Big winners
pay for so many experiments. And when he
says big winners pay, they pay in
failures. They pay in the scars that
they have to incur and endure along to
hitting it out of the park and hitting
it out so big that they never have to
swing again. And so I want to make this
as real as I possibly can. I just found
an old note from myself to myself that's
12 years old. And so I talked about my
$10,000 per month income goal. And
reading it got me actually pretty choked
up. This is all to say that no matter
where you're at in your journey, you've
just got to believe with all your
[ __ ] heart that you're going to make
it because no one else is going to
believe for you. Because you can never
expect someone to invest in you more
than you invest in yourself. And the
crazy thing is some people say they kill
for a shot or they die for a chance when
in reality they won't even wake up 60
minutes earlier for it. So, we've
eliminated the distractions, all of the
things associated with not doing this
stuff. And now, hopefully, I've removed
some of the mental BS around getting
started. And so, now once you start, you
got to get better. Connections, money,
looks, intelligence, those are all
great, but you can beat someone with all
of those things if they have only one
trait. An insatiable desire to improve.
No matter where they start, it's hard to
beat someone who improves every second
of every day without giving up. And this
is why earlier I said ambitious people
buy skills and they pay for those skills
with time and money. And in order to
have the time and money to invest in
those skills, they have to take them
from somewhere else. Because the thing
is is that your resources are zero sum.
And this is something that a lot of
people aren't comfortable with. Whatever
you choose to spend your time on, you
take from something else. Whatever you
choose to spend your money on, you take
from something else. And so, most people
don't have a resources issue. They have
a priorities problem. You are choosing
to say that other things are more
important. And hey, I want to be real.
If that stuff is more important to you,
then amazing. You want it life.
Congratulations. But if you don't have
what you want and you're spending money
to proliferate a life that is not the
one you want to lead, then you need to
shift the list to invest the time and
money and pull from those things that
you don't want to put more in the ones
you do. And you want to starve out
failure. So think about this. One of the
easiest ways to to have more money is to
work more hours. And you're like, how is
that possible? Well, when you work more
hours, it actually kills two birds. One
is that you actually make more money
when you work more hours, but on top of
that, you don't spend money because you
have less time to spend it. And so every
hour of work is a net positive in two
directions. So it saves you money you're
not spending and makes you money. And so
you want to find those little twists
that you can make in your investments of
time and money that are outsized. It's
not just that you gain, you also stop
the loss. I've always been willing to
bet big on me. And so, a lot of you guys
are trying to like bet big on Dogecoin
or some meme thing or like some
get-richqu. And I promise you, the guys
who have all the money know how to do it
better than you. And if you have your
last thousand or 5,000 or $10,000 that
you're like, "What do I do with it?" Bet
on you cuz you'll never sell you. You're
a long-term hold, right? And so, if you
get better, you guarantee the win. And
every investment you make compounds. You
guarantee compounding because every
skill stacks on top of other skills.
Steve Jobs talked about how when he went
to college and learned calligraphy, it
was the reason that fonts showed up in
the Mac later. And so he talks about you
can only connect the dots looking back.
You want to double down on investing
more into you getting skills. And I'll
tell you something that you probably
don't know. So I spent $10,000 and I
only had 50 saved up after years of
being a consultant. So I had $50,000
saved up. was 23 years old. It was my
life savings. I spent $10,000 to get a
gym coach. I joined a mastermind for gym
owners. Fun fact, though, I didn't have
a gym. But I figured if I go to a
mastermind of gym owners, I'm going to
learn so many of the things that they
made mistakes on when they started their
gym. They're they're going to have
opinions on how I should lay out the
square footage, what what locations I
should pick, what model I should use.
And so rather than say, "Oh, I'm just
going to find out all these failures on
my own my own and and take five times as
long," I was like, "I'd rather pay
$10,000 to pull five years forward into
the present." And so I was able to get
that first location up and profitable
and outsource by month nine. Now, some
of the guys in the mastermind were at
year five and still hadn't done that. I
pay down my ignorance tax as much as I
possibly can because the cost of you not
being able to achieve your dreams, the
price is ignorance. And the debt that
you pay is the distance between where
you are and how much you'd be making if
you knew how to do it. I I've told this
story before, but I think it's so it's
it's something that's so ingrained in
how I think in terms of how I price what
I'm willing to pay in time or money. And
before I tell that story, I move
geographically whenever I see an
opportunity to get around someone who's
better than me. And so when I wanted to
learn fitness stuff, I moved to an area
where I knew there was other fitness
entrepreneurs that I was like, "Well,
maybe I'll be able to hang out with them
a little bit and I'll learn a little bit
there." And I went to a city that I
didn't know anything about. I knew no
one. And when I wanted to when I wanted
to uh get in the gym space, I said,
"Well, California is like the capital of
fitness, SoCal. So, I'm gonna move out
to Southern California because the best
guys will be there. and if I can win
there, I'll be able to win anywhere. And
so I moved out to California without
knowing anyone. Whenever I've had these
big transitions in my life is not only
being willing to bet with my money and
bet with my time, but also bet with my
geographic location. I'm willing to risk
losing the relationships that I had to
gain relationships that I need. And so
2025 for you might mean that you have to
leave where you're at. And that could
mean across town, but it could also mean
across the country or even across into a
different country. It may mean that
you're going to spend take all this
money that you used to spend here and
spend it in an entirely different way.
You probably are going to have less
stuff and that's okay because that stuff
only deteriorates. It only gets worse.
But you will only get better. Don't
invest in Dogecoin. Don't even invest in
the S&P 500. Invest instead in the SME
500. Invest in you because you will
always beat a 10% return in the stock
market. And if you think that Dogecoin
is going to out compete your personal
growth, you're never going to win.
Anyone can get rich fast as long as
you're willing to make no money for a
long period of time while you work to
get good enough to get rich fast. And so
I told you I'll tell you that story. The
story goes like this. A guy is actually
using this as a sales close to an
audience. He wrote a million dollars on
a whiteboard in front of an audience.
And so then he called out to a lady in
the front row and he said, "How much do
you make, ma'am?" and she said,"
$50,000.
And he said, "Okay,
well, right now you pay reality $950,000
every single year for not knowing how to
make a million." And when I saw that, I
realized that the value of the skill of
making a million dollars is the
difference between what I'm making and
what I could be making. And people
wildly undervalue how much more they
could be making once they have a skill.
And so if you're the type of person who
can actually follow instructions, show
up on time, smile, be able to fail and
keep going, virtually all education will
net you a positive yield. Because let me
ask you a question. Would you pay
$950,000
to make a million dollars and be able to
make a million dollars every year? Well,
that would be an insane deal. You pay it
once and you get the skill forever. So
every year after that you make a million
dollars a year. Well, of course you
should. Now, once you make the million
dollars a year, are you willing to give
a 100% of what you make to make $10
million a year? Of course you should.
And that's why education is by far the
highest return. You can learn how to
make a million a year for probably close
to $200,000 a year. And you're like,
"Well, well, where where do I spend
that?" You'll spend that on conferences.
You'll spend it on seminars. and it'll
likely be in 2,000 to to 5,000 sometimes
$30,000 chunks. But for some reason,
you're willing to spend this on some
academic who hasn't been in reality for
20 years cuz they're on tenure and
thinks that the world uh is just going
to hand you stuff because that's their
reality because they're government
funded. Or you can pay money to people
who live in real private businesses who
do this stuff for a living. And here's
the thing. I have never paid for
education and not gotten more than what
I paid for. Now, I don't want to
conflate that with the fact that I've
paid for things that I didn't think was
worth that money to other people. But I
always ask myself, okay, number one, how
can I become the best student who's ever
gone through this? How do I become this
person's number one success story? And
I've told every program, every partner,
every vendor that I've ever worked with,
I will be your biggest success story.
And so the reality is once I am their
biggest success story, is that because
of them or because of me? And I think
that's a choice that you get to make. Am
I going to be the number one success
story or do I want to be right and prove
that they're not good? Well,
congratulations. Maybe they're not that
good. Well, what does that leave you
with? No skills and less money. If you
choose to succeed anyways and say, "What
can I learn from this person? Because
I've learned just as much from bad
people as I have from good." Because a
lot of times getting good is actually
the removal of bad. And so if you find
out other ways that people do a terrible
job, it's also a wonderful way of
figuring out how to not do a terrible
job. And so if I want to create a
product that's exceptional and I say,
let's say I want to put a phone, a
camera, the internet, email, all in one
place. If you remove all of the stuff
that sucks from all of those things,
what you're left with is an iPhone. Most
times you can always get more than what
you pay for when you invest in you. So
let's get really tactical. If you really
want to double down on you, which will
by far I mean think about this 10%
improvement is the S&P 500. So you're
saying that you could take Okay, let's
be real. Let's do let's do real math. So
let's say that you've got $10,000 saved
up. Okay, let's say that's what your
savings is, which by the way makes you
like a top 40% American, FYI. So, let's
say you've got $10,000 saved up. You
could put in the S&P 500 and have that
$10,000 be 10,900
one year later. Or you can spend that on
something that can triple your earning
capacity. And next year, instead of
making, let's say, $50,000 a year, you
make $100,000 a year. Well, which of
these increases the $50,000 plus
increase is more than the net of the
900? Because you lost the 10, you spent
the whole thing here. You invested it.
Here you spent it. But did you spend it
or did you invest it in asset you could
control? And so I don't know about you,
but I'd rather have the extra 50 and put
the 10 in. And then what do I do next
year? I'm going to take this 50
and I'm going to ask myself, is there
anything I could put this $50,000 into?
So, I could put in the S&P 500 and I
could go and add myself an extra uh
5,000 uh $55,000, whatever. Let's say I
get 10% that year. Okay, so I get 55,000
this year. Or I could put that 50K into
10 five 10K things or two 25K things and
all of a sudden take my earning power
from 100K to 250K.
Wow, what a deal. But I'm gonna lose the
whole 50 again. And so the thing is is
that on my way up, I basically took my
savings and I spent it almost every year
on education because why on earth would
I want the future to take longer to get
to me? When you buy skills, it's the
closest approximation to buying time.
And so there's this big thing like you
can't buy time. False. You can buy the
future at a discount. and you buy the
future at a discount by buying the
skills required in order to get there
faster. And so if it could take you five
years if you did it on your own or it
could take you one year if you paid four
different people to help you out with
each step of the process, why would you
not want to pay all of the money you
have to get to there and then have four
years of gain with that new baseline.
You now are living four years, 5 years
into the future. It's like you skipping
from being 20 to 25 and you getting the
earning power at 25 plus, but now you're
just 21. And then when you're at that
point, you pull the next 5 years for it.
And when you're 22, it's like living
like you're 30, right? Like now at that
point though, you might spend all your
savings yet again. And this process has
been one that I have consistently done
for the entirety of my career. And it
just gets to a point where you can't
even spend the money. And so my very
controversial advice is spend all your
money on education for as long as you
possibly can until you can't even spend
the money because you're making too much
of it. And so how do you become an
expert? you do more repetitions than
anyone else in a narrow field, which
also means you fail more times than
anyone else in a narrow field. And so,
if you want to beat someone, just try 10
times harder than them. And you only
really need to try two or three times
harder, but you probably don't realize
how much harder they're trying than you
are. So, try 10 times harder just to
make sure you win. People reject this
idea that someone can work 10 times or
100 times harder. But I define work as
output. And so for you to say that
someone can't produce 10 times more than
you is just factually false. There's
tons of people who produce 10 times
more. There's tons of people who produce
100 times more than you. I'll give you
the easiest example in the world. A lot
of departments run on weekly cadences.
They say do this thing by end of week.
Often times you can ask that person how
many hours will this really take you?
And then that person will say something
like I don't know three or four hours.
You say okay well why don't you just get
it done by noon. And then at noon you
say okay what's the next thing gonna
take? and they'd say, "Uh, probably
another 3 or 4 hours." You say, "Cool,
get it done by the end of the day." Now,
from those two cycles, that would have
normally taken 2 weeks or 14 days, but
instead it got done in one. And so, just
right there, you got something done. You
got 14 times more done than the
competitor who's doing things on a
weekly basis. And so, this is how you
drag the future to the present is that
you're not focusing on how hard you're
working, you're focusing how much you're
getting done. You'd be amazed at how
much better you get after you've done it
a hundred times. If you want to win, do
it again. I want to be clear. You don't
just post a hundred videos in a row and
see what happens. You post one, see what
worked, and then try and do more of that
thing. And so, the idea isn't just raw
effort. It's raw effort with an
improvement loop. And so I remember one
of my favorite words that I have to
teach sales guys because it's a very
repetitive task to teach someone how to
sell is great, do it again, great again.
Great job again. And so it's that
repetition that breeds the nuance of
skill. And you want it to be so drilled
into you that you no longer have to
consciously think about how to do the
thing because you can then do it as a
natural skill so that you can move on to
putting your attention to the next
skill. So it's not just about learning
how to do it once. It's about learning
how to do it so many times that you
don't have to think about doing it at
all. Especially if you're starting out,
your goal should not be passive income.
Mainly because you don't have enough
money for the passive income to mean
anything. Instead, you should learn how
to make money while you're awake before
trying to learn how to make it while you
sleep. You crawl, then you walk, then
you run. Once you have more money than
you can possibly reinvest in education
and acquiring more skills, then you can
take the leftover and put that into your
passive income pool. And so, very, very
tactically, this is what I'll walk you
through. You should have an education
investment budget. And so, just like you
spend X dollars per month, so let's say
you we pull all of your expenses down
and you're making an extra $1,000 a
month. Okay? Now, if you're not eating
out, you're not buying new clothes,
you're not going out with the boys,
you're not spending money in stupid
ways, that if that's what you're doing,
then you're going to have $1,000 left.
If you have that, then you can take that
money and every month you can put it
towards a bank account that you can
either choose to immediately spend or
save up for something that is more
expensive. And I can tell you that a lot
of what I learned when I when I bought
programs and seminars and conferences
and things like that wasn't even from
the content itself, but it was
connections that I was able to make at
those types of events that I was then
able to leverage the one skill I had,
which I was good at sales, and then
start giving that away to every person I
met so that I could collect those IUs
and then learn skills for free. And so
it's like I really just needed a ticket
to get in the room and then I could
trade with everybody else with the
skills I had to then get to learn
theirs. And so as wild as this sounds,
at the end of 2025, you could be dead
broke but rich in skills. And so let's
say at the end of next year, you
actually have no more money, but you now
have the ability to make more money. And
so just like my father had to start over
from nothing after losing everything, he
didn't lose everything. He still had the
most valuable thing he had, which is
that he was a surgeon. And so he knew a
skill and he could make it work here
like he'd make it work there. And that
is something that no divorce can take
from you. No government can confiscate.
And it's something that's with you till
the day you die. And so that's how you
get better. You keep going. You keep
improving the feedback loops. You invest
appropriately. And you keep going allin
on you. We've eliminated everything
that's bad. We've started something
that's good. We've gotten even better at
being goodter. And now finally, we've
got to stick to it when it gets tough
because it will. Here's something that's
taken me way too long to learn. Staying
focused is like beating addiction. It's
not a one-time victory. You have to
fight it all day, every day, then wake
up and do it again tomorrow. Because the
thing that's going to distract you is
going to change every day. The thing
that's going to trigger your addiction
to distraction is going to keep morphing
and changing its form so that it can
steal or rob you of your future. And so,
you have to be adaptable in knowing that
you have to fight it every day. And so
it's not good enough to just say, "I was
focused for this week." You've got to
wake up on the eighth day and the ninth
day and do it again. And so, you
remember that guy who uh got rich drop
shipping and day trading and uh buying
crypto and wholesaling all at the same
time? Yeah. Me neither. Focus. To win in
business, you need to be able to say no
without remorse and hear no without a
loss of enthusiasm. which means that you
have to keep feeling rejection, keep
failing, and keep going while being
willing to reject basically everyone
else. And that seems so counter because
you're right there and you're like, man,
I don't want to reject this person
because I know what it feels like to be
rejected. You need to be able to
maintain this discrepancy so that you
can create the space to do the work that
needs doing. So, there have been a
couple of lessons that I have learned
over and over again in my career. I've
had to relearn. So, it's a lot like a
like a fine wine. It's like it it gets
better with age and there's more nuance
to the flavor. So, I think focus is not
a are you focused or not. It's how
focused are you? And you can measure
someone's focus by again the quality and
quantity of things that they say no to.
Which means that as you get better, more
opportunities will emerge, which is
interesting because people who start out
can't see opportunity anywhere. And it's
because they have so few skills and so
there's very few opportunities for them.
When you have a lot of skills, there are
so many opportunities that are in front
of you that you feel like you're missing
out. But the real opportunity is
actually in solving the problems in
front of you. I was able to, in my
opinion, become another order of
magnitude greater in terms of
entrepreneurship, which I would just
measure by wealth. Once I was able to
learn to say no and accept that I would
not be able to pursue the many things
that I know I could crush because once
you realize how much actual work it
takes to make something good, you
realize how few things you're actually
going to be able to do in your entire
life. And so this is why picking becomes
so important. Right now, the things that
you're going to have to say no to are
really the distractions and kind of in
some ways easy. Say no to fantasy
football, saying no to drinking beers
with the boys, going out with the club,
whatever. But in a year from now, once
you have more skills, there will be more
opportunities. You're going to have
multiple $10,000 a month income
opportunities that you're going to have
to say no to to stick with the one that
you have. And then once that thing
becomes a $100,000 a month thing that
you're doing, you're going to have to
start saying no to multiple $100,000 a
month opportunities. And here's the
thing with opportunities that come up.
They only show you the upside and not
the downside. You have to know where the
skeletons are buried. You have to know
where the bodies are. If you don't know,
and I've gone through this this this
visual because I think about it every
single time I have to walk through not
doing something. You are here. You see
this new opportunity here. Then you
understand the downsides here. Then you
live the downsides. Then you experience
the upside. Then you achieve your goal.
And so this is the starting point. This
is called uninformed optimism. This is
now informed pessimism. This is the
value of despair. And this is where most
people quit. But what they do is they
don't even quit because they don't want
to say they quit. What they do is they
start another one of these things and
they say, "Oh, this is now my uninformed
optimism." And then, "Oh, now I
understand this more." But the thing is
is that they never actually get through
to this upside. And so they just keep
jumping from thing to thing to thing
over and over again. And so the reason
it takes so long is because you're in a
rush. Big things don't happen on small
timelines because you have to start from
zero over and over again. And if you
actually stick with it, it's actually
the shortest way to get to where you
want to go. It just takes longer than
you think. Must be easy for you to say
is probably something that you might
think by watching this or listening to
this. And I like to tell this story
because in July of 2017 is when I
started my podcast. And it was 90 days
after I lost everything the last time.
And from that point until now, it's
taken that period of time to get to over
a million downloads a month. And for the
first three years, and I was making
multiple podcasts, so we're talking
three 400 episodes. For the first few
years, I never really cracked 3,000
downloads a month. And so I could say,
man, why is this taking so long? But the
real real is that it took me that long
to get good. It also being extra real
took me that long to have proof on the
outside that what I was saying was true
on the inside. And right now, no one who
listens to my podcast cares that it took
me seven years to get here. They just
cared that it's good today. And so
people quit here when things get hard
because the thought of something being
hard forever is unbearable. They think
that this line is just going to keep
going this way forever. But it's not
because once you fully understand all
the bodies where the skeletons are
hidden, then you can actually start
solving them one by one. The thing is is
that that distraction only is
distracting because you don't know what
sucks about it. You might think you know
what sucks about it, but you don't know
what sucks about it. And so the big
difference is you have something called
declarative versus procedural knowledge.
And so there's two types of learning and
this is actually formal. This is uh this
is from academia. So you have
declarative knowledge which is knowing
about something.
So if you go memorize a fact or you you
you learn how private equity works,
right? This is knowing about. The other
type of knowledge is procedural
which is knowing how to.
And so a lot of people mistake
declarative knowledge for procedural.
And so they mistakenly think that if
they watch 10 videos on doing a private
equity deal that it means they
understand how to do a private equity
deal. Or they watch 10 videos on cold
outbound and they think it means they
understand how to do cold outbound or 10
videos on sales and so forth. But you're
never really going to learn how to do it
until you do it. And so you're going to
learn more from your first hundred cold
calls or 100 cold knock on doors than
you will from a hundred books or videos
that you watch. But I have good news.
Nothing hard lasts forever. There's only
three things that can happen. You either
quit, it gets easier, or you get better.
So no matter what, it always ends. You
only lose when you quit before you see
it all the way through. And I think
that's incredibly encouraging. So no
matter how hard whatever it is that
you're doing is, which by the way just
means that your expectation doesn't
match reality. But no matter how hard it
is, you either quit, it gets easier
because something changes externally or
you get harder. Something changes
internally. But no matter what, it will
end. Think about it like you're you're
mining for gold, right? You're you're
chiseling away underground and you've
got this pile of gold. You don't know
how far away it is, but it's underground
and you're digging towards it. This
difficulty of swinging the the the
pickaxe can end when one, you walk out
of the mine and say there's, you know
what, marketing doesn't work. Sure. The
second is that all of a sudden you hit a
soft patch and then you're like, "Oh my
god, I'm digging so much faster now.
This is great." And then you get to the
gold. Or you just start swinging the axe
harder because you get more muscled, you
get more efficient with your movements,
and you just keep chiseling away. Even
if it goes from dirt to rock, you just
keep chiseling away at a slower pace,
but you eventually break through and get
there. But in all three of those
scenarios, hard doesn't last forever.
And so I'll give you a little rule of
thumb that I've seen on how do how do I
do more of what's working, right? How do
I keep going? When it's easy, do more.
When it's hard, do different. And so I
told this story years ago, and I'll tell
you guys again. So when Gym Launch just
barely started to work, all right, so
I'm like 3 months into Gym Launch
working. Guess what? Guess what
brilliant Alex thought he should do? So
I went to this meet up of 10
entrepreneurs. All the entrepreneurs
were eight figureure entrepreneurs, so
10 million plus per year. I was not
making that. I we were pacing probably
three or $400,000 a month at the time.
It was just me, Ila, and I think we had
an assistant over kitchen sink, right?
So, it was I was making the most money
I'd ever made in my life and probably to
this day because it was the most
material change in my life by
percentage. When you go from no money to
hundreds of thousands a month within 90
days, me looking at bankruptcy attorneys
6 months earlier to that, it's I can't I
can't explain how crazy reality shifted.
But I had this guy who came up to me
after I gave my little presentation of
like, hey, this is what's working. And
so, of course, what I want to do now is
start a supplement company. He came up
to me and he said, "If what you're
saying is true, if the economics of the
business that you've outlined really do
work as well as you say they do, when it
gets easy is when you go hard. It's when
you double down on what's working." And
he said that to me, and I remember he
said, "Because what's going to happen is
that if it really works this well,
someone bigger and better is going to
take all your stuff and immediately try
and do it with their distribution, their
audience, and their leverage." And so if
there's ever been a time to focus on the
thing that's in front of you, it's right
now. And I remember Leila and I felt
this huge weight of pressure that
started us at that point cuz literally I
think I was I was really content for
like 6 weeks and I was really thrilled.
We had just gotten married. We're 6
weeks into being, you know, married.
We're making really good money. Uh she's
23 or 24. I'm 26 or 27. So like we're
young. I was like, "Holy cow, this is
amazing." Our rent, for context, was
$1,200 a month. I was taking home 400,
right? Like, and so I've always lived
far below my means. At this point,
though, we went back home with the devil
inside of us in terms of the fear of us
losing everything that we had. And so,
we basically worked around the clock
like someone was trying to put us out of
business. And the thing is is that
people did eventually, but by the time
they did, we had gone so far ahead that
they were way behind us because we were
working against a hypothetical enemy who
was trying to destroy us, not the ones
that were actually mediocre and
distracted. When it's easy, do more.
Once it starts working, put the blinders
on and hit the gas. And I would
challenge you with this tactical setup
right now. If you've never worked for 30
days straight, I would encourage you to
try it. In China, there's something
called the 996, which is basically the
standard for Chinese tech work hours,
which is you work 9:00 a.m. to 9:00 p.m.
6 days a week. That's the bar. And so, I
like to state that because we think we
work so hard. That's just the average.
And so, I would encourage you, remember
hard times, hard men, right? Good times.
Well, we need to act as though it's hard
times because if you don't, you're
surely going to become soft. My
challenge for you is work 30 days
straight. Work 10, work 12 hours a day,
30 days straight. What you will realize
at the end of this is one, how much work
you can actually do. Two, that you're
not going to die. You're not made of
glass. And third, you'll know that you
have that gear if the time calls for it.
Now, I will be very real with you. I
work more now than I have ever worked in
my life. Save maybe when I opened my
very first gym. So, I work in absolute
hours more than I ever have. And I
produced significantly more than I did
then. And this year, I think I've taken
something like 10 or 11 days off in
2024. I would measure a day off as any
day where I worked probably fewer than
four hours. I put this as context. And I
had a I had a security guard who was
here atacquisition.com
earlier this year and he was talking to
uh some of the younger guys on the team
and he said you should never let Alex
work more hours than you because he's
already ahead of you. And so if you want
to catch up with him certainly don't let
him outwork you. Some of the hoodoo
mental health whatever people are going
to disagree with me. also don't give a
[ __ ] And so the thing is is you can
just go and make those mental health
people happy or you can get what the
[ __ ] you came here to get. You can do
what you came to do. And I have found
that in my life I've gotten
significantly more purpose and more
drive from a long day's hard work from
earning my shower at the end of the day
than anything that I've ever had from a
pleasure- seeeking perspective. As much
as it's great to go to the pool for a
day and hang out with some people or
maybe just watch movies, as great as
that may be, there's nothing that I get
more filming out of than knowing that at
the end of a day that I work 16 straight
hours that I have some product that I
pulled out of my brain and into the
world that this thing got life. Now,
looking back on the best days of my
life, it was those types of days. And so
when I realized that, I stopped trying
to satisfy what everyone else told me my
life was supposed to be like. They're
like, "You should take vacations." I
took my first vacation this year, and it
was supposed to be a two-day vacation,
and Leila and I left after one. Because
what happened was I got there at this
beautiful resort,5 or $10,000 a night,
very expensive. And I I say that just to
say that it was ritzy, right? It was
luxurious. I get there, I sit out on the
back of this beautiful patio for this
really expensive room and I look out on
this, you know, mountain view and I
think to myself, this is beautiful and I
don't care. I wish I felt something. And
all I wanted was to get back in the
game. And so I realized that even that
little mini vacation was something that
I had done because I thought it was an
expectation. It was unspoken or spoken
from someone else in my life. And so I
have this quote that I live by which is
if you don't know why you believe what
you believe it's not your belief it's
someone else's at that time it's like I
had this belief that I should take a
vacation but why now if I can't explain
it which I really can't then I shouldn't
do it and now I want to be very clear
this doesn't mean that there's no time
for rest but I like to think about the
hypothetical extremes I like to think
about the 996 that is just the standard
in China and I like to think about
people in the middle ages in the dark
ages. They worked above their shop and
they didn't have like the 7-day or 5day
work week is something that was invented
in the last hundred years. This is not
pointing to your human capacity. This is
pointing to a societal constraint. I
think that a truly liberated individual
operates purely from first principles of
what do I want? What does it take to get
it? And then what are the things that
hold me back? And those those things
that hold you back are going to be
physical constraints. You can't operate
without sleep. Not for an extended
period of time. So, I'm not saying don't
sleep. Sleep as much as you can. I'm not
saying that you can work physical labor
all hours of the day without rest. You
need rest. And sometimes you need mental
rest, which is different than physical
rest. And that's okay. So, if you need,
and I'm going to put need in quotes
here, if your way of unplugging is
watching Netflix, cool. If your way of
unplugging is gardening, cool. If your
way of unplugging is working out, cool.
Do what works for you. But
fundamentally, the goal is to increase
total net output over the longest period
of time. And so, it's not about, okay,
I'm going to work 24 hours straight.
Well, you're actually going to take from
tomorrow. So, your net output over two
days is going to be much worse. And so,
it's really balancing that. And I
learned that much later in life. I was
able to get significantly more out of
myself working seven days a week and
working 10 hours, 12 hours on those days
rather than working, call it, 18 every
day. That was for me a little bit too
much. Now I have had seasons where I
call it three shifts. So basically I
work 6:00 to noon, noon to 6:00, and
then I work 6 to basically sleep time
when I get back home. I only usually
have to go into that gear probably once
a year for maybe 6 weeks to 8 weeks is
when I have to go into the third shift.
But most of the times I can pretty much
sustain 12 hours of work a day kind of
indefinitely. I bring this up to kind of
set the bar for at least where I'm at.
So maybe you have some sort of
benchmark. But if you're wanting to get
ahead, I can promise you working less is
probably not the way to do it.
Especially when you don't have as many
skills because the fewer skills that you
have, the more labor or volume you have
to compensate with in order to make up
for the ineffectiveness per unit of time
you work. And so in the beginning is
when you actually have to work the most,
but in the end is when you want to work
the most because of how much more you're
getting for it. So my team wanted me to
make this point because they've
obviously seen me work and they're like,
I don't think this is coming through in
this video, which is that I have an
obsession with speed. This seems kind of
weird in just position with patience,
but this is the very classic micro
speed, macro patience, you know,
whatever whatever whatever is you
prefer. The idea is though that you want
to pull reality forward. And so I always
like to break things down, whether it's
me or my team, into how many hours and
minutes something's going to take. And
then I like to stack those things back
and forth. And rather than using
arbitrary deadlines of, okay, let's get
this done by next week, you use actual
deadlines based on how long it should
take. And then when you find out how
long something takes, you then ask the
next question, which is how can I make
this take less time? How can I automate
this thing? How can I automate portions
of this work? How can I how can I give
away chunks of this? How can I deem some
of this unnecessary? And so that
continuous cutting and pulling forward
of tasks is how you can move so much
faster through life and towards your
goals. And so I have this weird mental
belief that there's like this this big
path in front of me that I have all
these skills that I have to achieve to
hit these milestones that is laid out on
this time span. And so I reject the
timeline, but I accept the skills. And
so the idea is like, okay, it's like I'm
a Pac-Man of like eating those little
dots and each of those dots is a skill.
It's like I want to pull it towards me
as fast as I can so I can so I can
ingest the skills and basically power up
myself faster because I know that these
skills are requisites. I can't move on
to calculus without knowing arithmetic.
I can't move on to calculus without
knowing algebra. There's no way around
it. But I can choose to learn algebra
faster. And so then it's like, okay,
what is required to learn algebra? Oh,
and if I do more problems faster than
the standard person, then I'll get there
faster. And so if the class says, "Okay,
I need you to do these 10 problem sets
and they're due next week." Well, then
how long does it take for me to do those
problems, maybe 30 minutes, then why
can't I do my second lesson 30 minutes
later and then do another 10 problems
and do my third lesson 30 minutes after
that and do another 10 problems? Well,
if that's the case, then I can do an
entire year's worth of work in a week.
And this is how in my opinion pulling
forward is one of those things that I've
seen so many of the most successful
entrepreneurs do is they simply question
timelines
aggressively and ruthlessly eliminate
any waste or gap between the actions
required to win and everything else.
Honestly, I think the things that I'm
working on right now for my skills are
I'm learning how to
reinforce
cultural norms. across a company that
continues to scale which I define as the
rules that govern reinforcement in an
organization. That is the culture and
those are both spoken and unspoken
rules. And when I say rules, I mean when
someone does this, they get a pat on the
butt. When someone does this, they get
uh chastised or they get a ding, right?
And the thing is is that people like to
say they have a good culture here, but
the culture is is is hundred a thousand
unspoken rules and that's why it takes
people time to learn and figure out what
the culture is when they go somewhere
new. You can give someone a list of
aundred rules and if you were very
granular, you could figure it out. The
problem is that the culture changes
based on the people who change the
reinforcers. And so that means that the
culture in a team could be different
than the culture in the company because
the person who's closest to them uh
manages it differently. And so that
changes the behavior. And so that's why
a sales team can have a different
culture than a marketing team, a
different culture than a finance team,
different culture than an HR team. And
so I'd say right now a big focus of me
of mine is trying to standardize the
rules that govern reinforcement across
an organization that scales and making
sure that everyone is aligned with that
style of work. The second thing that I'm
working on right now is basically the
highest level of recruiting. And
recruiting and talent is actually kind
of like focus where it's one of those
skills that I don't think you ever
master. You just keep learning how many
more levels there are to it. It's like
right when you finish it, you realize
that you're at a sub peak and there's
actually another peak beyond it. The
missed lifts and then you see the next
steps. And so like focus, I thought,
"Oh, I was focused at $100,000 a month
because I could turn these opportunities
down." And then you got some even sexier
opportunities. You got to learn how to
say no to those. So the same thing
happens with talent is that you're
willing to tolerate a certain amount of
mediocrity at one level. That is no
longer tolerable at a level above that.
And the types of people that you bring
in, you have a higher standard, a higher
bar for those people and attracting them
in the process associated with getting
them to buy into your culture, your
vision, and getting them to take their
skills and apply them to your
opportunity is a skill set that I am
working on now because fundamentally I
have a belief which is the best talent
is always yet to come. And that's
predicated on the idea that if I get
better, my opportunity will get better
and that will attract more people and
better people. And I bring this up
because I basically want to translate
one thing, which is that the
reinvestment in learning skills never
ends. And so Charlie Mer said this, you
just have to be a lifelong student. You
have to be willing and want to learn. So
I actually had um an example of this. So
recently there was somebody on uh teams.
I did a bunch of one-on- ones uh over
the last week cuz I was looking at one
of the departments and uh one of the one
of the guys said, "Hey, I have this
particular skill. I was hoping that we
could eventually have a a role that only
does this thing." And I said, "You know,
it's interesting that you that you ask
or you make that request because if I
were you, I would not think that way at
all. I would think how could I learn 10
more skills." Rather than how can the
organization meet my demands, it should
be how can I let my skills meet the
demands of the existing business. It's
asking reality to meet you where you're
at rather than meeting reality where it
is. And I think that too many people do
this. Why can't the world insert be more
convenient for me? Well, the world is
uncaring and doesn't care about you at
all. And underlying underpinning that
statement is the entitlement is the
expectation that it somehow should. And
I think that is a poverty lens. And so
the wealthy accept the world for what it
is and then choose to maximize and
adapt. Everyone else tries to stomp
their feet and throw tantrums and say
how it's not fair. And they're right.
And so what? There's a Haitian proverb
that has nothing to do with cats and
dogs that I think is relevant right now,
which is behind mountains are more
mountains. Goals aren't finish lines,
they're mile markers. And I think that's
a great mental frame, which is that you
think that your goal is to get to
$10,000 a month or $100,000 a month or
million a month or 10 million a month,
whatever your goal is. And I can promise
you, having hit those, you just move it
again. You just the mist lifts when you
get there and you realize there's
another mountain top. But where people
lose their way is when they start
listening to people at the bottom of the
mountain who see them at the subhead and
say, "You weren't happy last time when
you got to the last peak. Why are you
going to be happy the next time?" But
that's under their assumption in their
poverty lens that you did it to get to
the mountaintop. You did it for the
climb and they'll never understand that
and don't expect them to. I remember I
was trying to understand this person who
had made this really irrational decision
and I kept thinking like how how does
this decision make sense and I was I was
talking to my father actually and he
said you're trying to apply logic to
someone who's illogical and that itself
is illogical and I remember thinking
about that is that like there are these
people in our lives that say these
things that you're like I don't
understand why they'd say that and then
you try and make sense of it but the
effort of trying to make sense of
somebody who doesn't make sense is
nonsensical. And so if it doesn't make
sense to you, ignore it because they're
going to disappear anyways. One of the
things that has been true in my life is
that the lazy don't know how to start,
the losers don't know how to finish, and
the legends don't know how to stop. And
if I look at that, the lazy, the loser,
the legends, I know which one I would
rather be. And I also say that as
somebody who doesn't believe in legacy
or anything after we die. So, this is
tactical. Find what works, do more of
what works, find the thing that's
preventing you from doing more of what
works, solve that thing, and get back to
doing more of what works. Then repeat.
And so, the reality is that in health,
marriage, business, or any game worth
playing, you don't win by winning. You
win by staying alive long enough that
you outlast everyone else. So I will
give you the advice that I gave a
subgroup in school that we picked a
100red people who had applied out of 500
plus to basically do a 90-day sprint to
help them start a school community. So
we wanted to do a more in-depth kind of
training things like that for this
special group so that we could see if
this new implementation yielded better
results. And so the guy who we had
running the group asked me he's like can
you give any kind of like words of
wisdom to these guys before we kick it
off? And so this is what I told them.
Number one follow instructions. Number
two, when you reach something that you
don't understand how to do, Google
first. Number three, when you figure it
out, post it. Others also may have
struggled. Four, actually follow the
rule of 100 daily, which is that you
reach out to a 100 people, you make a
post that you spent 100 minutes on,
spend $100 plus on ads, and you spend at
least 100 minutes a day making and
improving ads and researching ads. As
long as you do those things consistently
and you get better, you will see
results. And the amount of you that I
see who tag me in like day four, day 20,
day 30, the guys who are at day 60 of
rule of 100 are like, I have more
business than I can possibly handle. The
problem is no one sticks with anything.
And this is why I want you to stick with
it. Rule number five, you will be
excited for a week, then excitement will
end, and that is where the work begins.
Six, your work works on you more than
you work on it. You are the product
that's getting built more than anything
that you're actually putting into your
business. Remember that. Seven,
everything is unscalable in the
beginning. That's the point. It's how
you learn every piece of it. And once
you learn every piece of it, people will
call you an expert. Eight, the pain of
repetition is what forces you to seek
improvement. When you figure out ways to
get more for what you do, you've gained
skill. People want to avoid the pain.
One of my favorite bodybuilding coaches,
Milo Sachev, talks about this in the
context of how to grow a muscle. He
says, "Find the pain." And then he'll
just shout, he'll be like, "Suffer.
Suffer." He's like, "Stay there. Find
the pain." Because the thing is is that
that pain is what forces you to change.
And so if you encounter the pain and
then say, "Oh, it's not working." That's
the pain that you need to lean into.
Because when it's not working is what
will force you to do an improvement. And
that's how you get good at making better
content, get good at making better ads,
get good at having more effective
reachouts on different channels,
whatever. It's that pain that forces you
to improve. Nine, if you complain, you
are dead to me. And I said this because
I believe it. Like there is nothing
weaker and more helpless and that has
lower agency than someone who simply
complains about what has occurred. It's
something that happened in the past or
is in front of them in the present. And
regardless, complaining literally does
nothing. It's a net zero. It's a net
loss. You both lose the energy that you
could have spent improving. And you also
lose respect from every single person
that you complain to. And they will
associate the complaints with you. They
won't remember what you complain about,
only that you complain. 10. Literally
thousands of people have already
succeeded. You are not special. Repeat
the same activities and you will be able
to repeat the same outcomes. Before you
make a conclusion that something doesn't
work, I want you to state the objective
truth of what you're claiming. You're
like, "Facebook ads don't work." Sure.
So the 400 billion a year in advertising
that gets spent on Facebook just somehow
doesn't work. People aren't doing it
because it's not working. Cold outbound
doesn't work. Yeah. So, the gazillion
companies that do 10,000 emails, 10,000
calls a day, they just it just it
doesn't work. What you have to reframe
it as is, I don't know how to make it
work. I am not good enough to know how
to make it work because you're not
making as much money as you want because
you're not as good as you think you are.
11. Write down every reason that you're
going to stick with it. Put it in front
of you and revisit it when you need a
reminder of why to stick with it. 12.
Business is shockingly simple but
surprisingly hard. The hard comes in the
form of consistency. The moment you
don't want to do it or just skip today
is the day you realize what hard
actually feels like. Learn to endure,
overcome.
13. Just win. Because at the end of the
day, all of this hardship will be
forgotten. It will fade into your
memory. And so know that as you're going
through it, you're actually just going
to disproportionately in your memory
remember the good stuff and not the bad
stuff. I only have a few glimpses in my
memory of the time when I was sleeping
on the floor and I and I, you know, had
my gym and I was getting started and I
remember being so tired that like a good
night's sleep couldn't fix it. I
remember that. But it's almost like I
remember the words that I told myself
more than I even remember the
experiences because it was so long ago.
things will get better and you will
remember the betterness more than you
remember the suffering because the
betterness will carry over in today
which will always be fresher for you
than how long ago the suffering may have
been. The best time to work on improving
your business was last year. The second
best time is today so you might as well
get started. So if you're a business
owner and you'd like to scale, I'd like
to invite you out to my headquarters for
one of our scaling workshops where we
help identify and solve your number one
constraint so you can start the year
with lots of momentum. So, it's two days
again at my headquarters with my team
talking about your business. And so, if
that sounds at all interesting, click
the link below, book a call with my
team, and if you're a fit, we'd love to
see you out of here. Most of my success
in business has come from finding and
exploiting unfair advantages. Here are
15 lessons on finding and leveraging
yours. So, let's start with number one.
Pain is the price of progress.
The fastest growth periods are often the
most miserable. If you want to progress,
get used to pain. If you think about
what actually occurs when you grow, you
stretch past your point of comfort. So
even if you're growing a muscle, like
you stretch it, you break it down, it's
painful. If you have growing pains, like
as a kid, it's like you grew too fast
and your joints are in a lot of pain. If
you're a company and you expand, this is
technically supposed to be good stuff,
but it doesn't make it any less painful.
Elite athletes don't get stronger during
easy workouts. If we want progress, we
must accept the price of pain that's
attached to it. You cannot both want
progress and live an easy life. These
two things conflict. Number two, happy
but not satisfied. So, let me explain
this. So, you're allowed to be happy
before you hit your goal, just not
satisfied. And so, there's a very big
difference between being content with
your life, content with your work, and
complacent, meaning you're not going to
take any more action. There's this great
Haitian proverb, which is behind
mountains are more mountains. It's kind
of like after every peak, you can just
see more peaks ahead of you. The work
works on you more than you work on it.
For me, I remember I had a year that I
basically went into retirement trying to
figure out what I wanted to do. And the
thesis that I came out with was that
hard work is the goal. And so, the fact
that there's something that happens as a
result of hard work is really just a
secondary effect. It's a consequence,
but the goal is the work itself. I, you
know, I had a friend this morning who
messaged me. They're like, "Why do you
still work?" And I was like, "Because
it's the thing that I enjoy doing most."
And when I looked back on my life, when
I didn't work, I was bored and felt
depressed. And when I do work, I am
stressed, but I do have moments that I
really enjoy as well. I took this as a
kind of a foundational truth for me, not
for everyone, that there is misery on
both sides. So, I might as well be
productive and useful. And the only way
to be productive and useful is to be
happy about the process, but not
satisfied so you can continue to provide
value to the world. Now, number three,
ignore critics. Now, this is probably
easy to say, hard to do. So, let me let
me break this down a little bit more.
So, friendly reminder that most people
are fat, poor pansies. Don't listen to
them when they try to deter you from
doing whatever it takes to succeed. So,
the average person will always try to
keep you average. It makes sense that if
you want to be extraordinary, you will
do things that an ordinary person would
see as extra, right? And so a lot of
people, and this is this is the really
hard part that I had to come to terms
with, is that a lot of people want to
see you fail because it justifies the
risk that they chose not to take. We
always have to think about listening to
the people who are closest to our goals,
not closest to us. And if you want a
more violent version of this, your
critics are going to eventually die and
their opinion isn't going to matter
then, which means it probably also
doesn't matter now. So, might as well do
what you wanted to do originally. Number
four, selective productivity.
Productivity comes from all the things
that you choose not to do. I'm going to
define two more terms for you because I
think it's important. I see commitment
as the elimination of alternatives. So,
if I get married, then I eliminate all
alternatives to the person that I'm
married to. Right? That is commitment,
right? Which is very similar to focus.
Focus, if you think of the hypothetical
extreme of focus, is that somebody does
literally nothing but one thing. So they
don't eat, they don't sleep, they would
eventually die, but they would be 100%
focused during the time that they were
alive, right? Obviously, we have to put
a couple things in. You have to eat
food, you have to sleep, right? But the
most focused person does the fewest
things outside of the thing they're
focused on. Focus is about the number of
things that you say no to. Having this
framework is, in my opinion, more
powerful for productivity than just
about anything else. Right? People are
always trying to figure out like
productivity hacks, but they want to add
things to their lives to become more
productive, which is completely counter
to what focus even means. It's getting
rid of everything that's not the thing
is how you focus. Now, part of that also
means environmentally, right? So, if you
like have a window that you look outside
of and you've got people who walk past
your office and people can knock on the
door or you've got slack notifications,
of course, you're not focused because
all of those things are not the work.
So, I'm going to give you an analogy
here. So, imagine there's a wall that
you have to get over. All right? In
order to you have to get a critical mass
to get above this wall, right? And so
you start putting up, you know, these
ladders
against the wall to try and climb over
the wall. All right, this should make
some sense. But as you try to build up
the the little rungs of the ladder, so
you put four rungs up. Well, you're not
going to get the critical mass required
to get over the hump to actually get the
success you want. But the idea, the
fallacy is that, oh, I'll just do all
three or four of these things and I'll
see which one works. When the reality is
that any of them work, but none of them
will work unless you work on one. And
so, we have to take these four rungs
that we're able to build and say, you
know what, we're not going to do that.
We're going to put that rung here cuz
I'm going to take that time that I'm
putting for my second opportunity, put
it here. I'm gonna take this rung and
put it right here. And then I'm gonna
take this rugg and what do you know? I
can get over this hump on top and I can
get to the other side of the wall, which
of course is where all the money and all
the happiness and all the, you know, the
girls uh with, you know, beautiful,
beautiful hair. Look at this beautiful
hair, right? This beautiful hair. Now
she looks like a bug. Anyways, uh hold
on. There you go.
What's crazy is that this literally
happens at all levels of business. Like
people who are starting out trying to
start five things, people who are at
like their second or fifth year. I
talked to a guy last night who has a
really good business, really good
margin, 50% margins, has great revenue
retention. He was in cyber uh security.
People stay with him, people pay. He has
no problem getting customers. He has no
problem delivering on them. I was like,
"What's the problem?" He's like, "Me?"
He said, "I just I get bored." He's
like, "I just want to start more
things." And I'm like, "Yeah, you got to
stop that." Like, it's like the thing is
is think about how much more successful
you'd be. So, zoom all the way out.
Think of somebody who gets better every
single year and works on the same
project for 20 years. you'd be like, "My
god, that guy's probably really [ __ ]
good." And what's interesting about this
is that it doesn't matter what project
the person works on, you do 20 years of
reps and you do nothing else, you're
going to be good. And so, if you know
that that's a that's a fact, that's a
certainty that you're going to be good
with 20 years of practice, then the
objective is to just get 20 years of
practice in one thing and stick with it.
So, like, your plans aren't working
because the plans are wrong. The plans
aren't working because you're not
working on the plan. The hard part about
the plan is not creating the plan or
even following the plan. It's sticking
with the plan. That's the hard part. All
right. Number five, fear
versus regret. So change is scary, but
so is regret. And so the life you live
depends on the one you fear most. The
more successful version of yourself also
has fear. It's just that your fear of
regret is greater than your fear of
rejection. Think about that for a
second. I'm going to say it one more
time. Your fear of regret must
supersede, must be bigger, must be
greater than your fear of rejection. And
so I remember when I when I when I quit
my management consulting job, which took
me six months, so I'm not saying this
from a pedestal. It took me 6 months of
I decided I wanted to quit. It took me 6
months before I actually quit. By the
way, you can measure how powerful
someone is by the distance between when
they make a decision and when it happens
in reality. So if you want to feel
impotent, then take as long as you
possibly can between when you make a
decision and when you act on that
decision. Now, for me, it was 6 months.
And all I did was I called my friends up
every night. I was like, I'm going to
quit my job. I'm going to start a
business. And I, you know, we talk every
night, literally every night. And I
would be pacing in my condo like, I'm
going to do it. I'm going to do it. And
I wouldn't do it. I was too afraid. I
was too much of a scaredy-cat. But the
thing that got me over the hump was
this. Number one, I knew that when I
looked back on my life, if I never took
the jump, I would have been ashamed of
myself. And I would have felt like I was
a pansy. And I was like, I can't die a
pansy. I have to be able to make a jump.
Number two, I played out plan B, which
is, okay, let's say I actually
completely fail. What happens? I was
like, well, I'm not really going to be
homeless. I know enough people that I
can get food, right? I was like, okay,
so I would probably just couch surf. I'd
have a little bit of shame, but at the
end of the day, what would I really do?
Well, I could always apply to get the
job that I had back or I could just go
to another place with an experience or a
story that would set me up for something
cooler later. And so all of a sudden I
was like, "Wait, so my plan B is that I
just have a cool experience that I could
talk about at a job interview or to go
to business school." Okay, that's that
doesn't actually sound that bad. And so
there's this huge amorphous fear, but
I've just noticed in my life that fear
only exists in the vague. It doesn't
exist in the specific. If you're afraid
of something, try and break it into
pieces and spell it out. Play out the
next two or three steps because all of a
sudden, if you're in the developed
Western world, the downside risk is not
really real. Like the only real downside
risk is the opinions of other people who
will say that you failed who you don't
care about anyways. But like you think
you're going to die, but you're not.
You're just going to learn some stuff
and you'll be like, "Oh, maybe next time
I'm not going to make that mistake." And
that's it. And I say this and it's easy
for me to say, but it took me 6 months
to figure this out. But I do remember my
final straw was the realization that I
had at the time no girlfriend, no kids,
and I had no real, you know, financial
responsibilities besides like eating and
having a place to live. I said, if I
can't make the decision now because it
feels too risky, I will never be able to
make the decision because if other
people rely on me, now some of you are
in a position where people do rely on
you and you're like, "Well, Alex, you
know, I've got people who rely on me."
Yeah, I would say that it makes it
harder and what now? Harder and so what?
But for me, that was the thing that got
me over the hump was like, if I don't do
it now, I'm never going to do it. I'm
never going to have fewer
responsibilities.
And to to play this out a little bit
more, if you have people who depend on
you, their dependencies on you might
increase. And so, if you can't do it
now, you still might as well do it,
right? Because it's only going to go one
way. Number six, persistence
creates timing.
So you can time everything perfectly if
your intention is to never stop. I'm
going to say this one more time. You can
time everything perfectly if your
intention is to never stop. So think
about this visually. So let's imagine
that this line right here is is the is
your lifeline. It's life as time passes.
Right? Now
let's say that you have some special
thing that's going to happen here and
some special opportunity that happens
here and some special opportunity that
happens here. What most people try and
do is they don't want to take they don't
want to work at all and then they're
like, "Oh, I'm just going to work here
and then I'm going to work here and then
I'm going to work here." But the
likelihood that you're there in these
three moments is very low if you're
trying to time it. But if you work the
whole time, then the timing will always
be perfect because you will be ready.
And so perfect timing is a complete
myth, but perfect preparation isn't. And
that on a long enough time horizon, your
opportunity will come. People think that
they need perfect conditions to start
when in reality starting is the perfect
condition. It creates the perfect
condition for opportunity to be
capitalized on. And I can tell you this
from firsthand experience with me like
the more you do, the more you see you
can do. And so opportunities multiply
with skill. And so the better you get at
doing stuff, the more things you know
you would be able to do and win at. And
so the goal is to gain as many skills as
possible so that you have access to the
maximum number of potential
opportunities. A lot of people were
thinking that, oh, I'm going to wait for
the right moment. But when you have
unlimited skills, like Elon can go do
whatever he wants. He could build a city
in the middle of the ocean. And so he
could do that. He has the skills because
the world of opportunities open to him.
He also spent all of his younger years
just developing all these different
skills, becoming a polymath across all
these different things, independent,
political stuff. Put it away. The point
is the guy is good. All right. And so
the goal is to get good and then you
will never have a shortage of
opportunities. Number seven, envy
versus effort. All right. Let me break
this down. If people worked for their
goals as hard as they envy others for
achieving them, they would already have
achieved them themselves. So think about
the amount of mental effort that goes
into the hate that people spew out, the
envy for wanting other people's stuff.
I'll give you a couple hard truths about
this. Number one, no one is doing as
well as you think they are. So, by
comparison, you're actually better off
than you think. Number two, you don't
win by beating people. You win by
growing into your potential and then
allowing them to shrink into irrelevance
by consequence. Three, and guess what?
Your biggest threat is not your
competition. It's a mediocre version of
you that never realized what you could
become. And as pathy as that may sound,
it's also true, right? A lot of people
think it's like ah, you know, that guy's
doing really well. It's like his doing
well changes nothing about your reality.
Something really ironic that I noticed
is that the people who get copied the
most by their competition are the people
who ignore the competition who are
copying them. Fundamentally, you start
by focusing on the customer and if you
always put the customer first, everyone
will copy you because you're actually
doing the thing that will work, which is
focusing on the customer. And there's a
lot of weird things in life like that
where like it's the opposite is what you
what you'd think like oh I'm going to
look at what everyone else is. It's like
no just do what matters most and then
people who don't know how to think will
just copy you. Real threat is that no
one copies you at all because you're
doing nothing. If you take all this
effort that you look that you put into
comparing yourself to other people that
you look to kind of like tearing them
down sometimes even in your mind. Let's
be real. Maybe you don't say it to other
people, but in your mind you're like me
that whatever that is, whatever that
feeling is that just do that towards you
not being good enough. What happens is
that when you do that, all of that
effort, all that energy goes into
improving yourself rather than tearing
down somebody else. And only one of
those things will help you. Number
eight, hard conversations create
opportunities. Hard truth, everything
you want is on the other side of a few
hard conversations that you have been
putting off. People either grow into
their potential or they keep living the
same six months of their life over and
over again. And the difference is how
many hard conversations you're willing
to have and how fast you have them once
you realize you need to. If you sherk
away from this, and I get it. I'm
somebody who like it for a very long
time had a hard time having hard
conversations, right? Like I literally
traveled across the country before I
told my dad that I left. All right? Like
I get it. So if you think having
uncomfortable conversations is hard,
just wait until you see the result of
not having them. It will be harder.
Basically, the the struggle is that you
have short-term pain versus long-term
pain. And long-term pain, I call regret.
Comfort is short gain. Regret is long
pain. Fear is short pain. Fulfillment is
long gain. You want to trade short pains
for long gains, not short gains for long
pains. It's not the safe bet. It's a
guaranteed loss just later. All right.
So, I'm going to I'm going to spell this
out. This is short pain.
This is long pain.
This is short
gain.
This is long
gain.
You want to trade short pain for long
gain.
That's the goal. It's the best trade.
Number nine, endure. There's a reason
that when I gave instructions to some of
the new business owners who were going
to start, you know, putting a community
on school, one of the sole instructions
I gave them was learn to endure. And so,
the fastest way to become the person you
want to be is to put yourself in a
situation where you have no choice but
to become them. You'd be amazed at what
you can endure when you have no choice.
For me, when I signed my lease for my
gym, I had $5,000 in my bank account.
The rent was $5,000. I had never really
made money before. And so I was like,
"Oh, wow. How does this work? If I made
100% of the money that I had made in my
job, I would have been able to pay rent
and have no food or anything else." But
one of my favorite flavor texts on Magic
cards is necessity is the mother of
invention, right? It's the constraints
that create the innovation that is
required to get you out of the
constraint, to get you out of the hard
time. And so when I think back on like
human history, sometimes we think that
things that were going through our
heart, but they're certainly much easier
than the things that other humans have
endured. And how did they endure them?
Well, when the only choice they had was
die or endure, you tend to endure.
Number 10, results. Excuses. This is not
going to be a big surprise here. The
thing with excuses that's interesting is
that they may be valid. And I think
that's the part that people struggle
with is that they're like, "Yeah,
obviously results matter more excuses,
but insert special snowflake." The thing
is is that like you might be right. And
I just like this quote from Ila. She
says, "It's not your fault, but it is
still your problem. You still have to do
something about it. Or you can just wait
and say, you know what? I'm going to
continue to not live the life that I
want until I die." And everyone will be
like, "Oh yeah, he had an excuse. That's
why."
Right? Is that what like is that what
you really want? is that people were
like, "Yeah, he had an excuse."
Like that's it. Like you like like it's
a weird thing to want a permission slip
for mediocrity, which is fundamentally
what excuses are. You just want
permission from everyone else to still
get respect without the outcome
because of your extenduating
circumstances. And the thing is is
there's a ton of lure, but the only
person who actually believes that is
you. People might not along. People who
love you might say, "Yeah, you know
what? You are special. You are a special
snowflake. Your mama might still love
you." But like, you're not going to earn
anyone's respect. And I think you
certainly won't earn the respect of the
person that matters most, which is you
cuz you'll always know that you could
have done more, that you could have done
better. That's the one that keeps me up.
I have a saying that I tell myself a lot
when I'm doing something that I don't
want to do, and it's I will do what is
required. It's not about doing your
best. It's about doing what's required
because what's required might be better
than your best is right now. But the
good news is that your best can get
better. So number 11, and this is this
one's real. All right. The hard way is
the easy way. You're like, "How does
that work?" The hard way is the easy way
because the easy way
never gets you there. So think about it.
People always are looking for the
shortcut, but you have to accept a very
simple truth, which is that the shortcut
never actually takes you to the place
that you're trying to go. And it's
because it's rarely one big thing. And I
would postulate, fancy word, right? That
there are a lot of shortcuts that exist
in life. Wait for it. Wait for it. And
everyone already uses those. And so
whenever an actual shortcut gets found,
all humans immediately do it and it no
longer becomes a shortcut. It's just a
thing that everyone does and it's not
really a thing anymore. Like we learned
how to tie knots. That was a big
breakthrough. And then everyone ties
their shoes and they're like, "Oh my
god, let me show you the shortcut to
this." It's like, "Oh, you tie." Like,
"Oh my god, everyone does it." and it's
like not a thing anymore, right? And so
all the things that you want to have
that most people don't have don't have
shortcuts. But thing is is so many
people waste so much time. They
literally waste longer than it would
have taken the hard way or the only way
to get there in search of the easy way
that doesn't exist. And so the reality
of this is that it's usually a hundred
small things that make days, weeks, and
months hard. It's the neverending
onslaught of [ __ ] And then you remember
after going through that onslaught of
[ __ ] that you signed up for this, but
then again, you figured that it would be
hard. And then you're reminded that this
is what hard feels like. And so you keep
going because it's the only choice you
have. I want to remind you that a lot of
times what we imagine hard to be is
different than how we experience hard
because the nature of hard changes, too.
And it's more of a limitation in how we
describe hardship than it is. And I
actually think there's a big problem
with this. So, just kind of like Eskimos
have like seven different words for
snow. I feel like I should have like 25
different words for hard, right? Like
the amount of things that you go
through. There's like lifestyle hard
like, okay, so there's sacrifice hard of
like you're giving up things that you
enjoy. There's also like effort hard of
like starting to do things that you hate
doing that you're not good at. There's
risk hard of the the fact that you could
lose something that you currently have,
right? That you have the chance of
losing what you currently have. You have
the uncertainty heart of the fact that
you might be doing all of the sacrifice
for nothing. There's lots of different
flavors of heart and each one of them
presents at different times and for some
reason when it gets a new kind of heart,
it's a new seventh type of snowflake
heart, then you're like, "Oh, this is
different." But it's not. It's just that
the thing that you grow comfortable
with, then you conquer and then you're
exposed to a new level. And so, I love
this quote from Paul Graham. He said,
"If you want to make a million dollars,
you have to endure a million dollars
worth of pain." Fundamentally, in my
opinion, the people who who who end up
building building, not inheriting,
building tremendous wealth just have
massive concentrations of pain. So,
don't go looking for the easy way
because it will never get you there.
Number 12, don't, this is a big one,
don't give away your power. Now, this
sounds very like, you know, girl power
or a little uh little like rahrh, but I
will I will break this down in a little
bit less rahrh way. So, what offends you
controls you. Whatever you point your
finger of blame towards is what also you
point your power towards. Meaning, we
talked about excuses earlier. I can't do
it because insert X. Insert X is the
thing that has power over your life. And
I remember when I realized this was that
I had this belief that I would never be
able to be in a long-term committed
relationship because my mother had hurt
me as a child. I didn't get enough hugs.
Who gives a [ __ ] Whatever. But I
realized that by using that excuse and
by saying it's her fault I'm broken.
It's her fault I can't trust people.
It's her fault I can't love anybody. By
by saying that over and over again, all
I did was I said, "My mother controls
how my love life will go." Oo, heavy
real. Well, I don't want her to have
control over how I choose to love or not
love or how how content I get in a
relationship or anything like that. So,
I actively had to say, "Maybe all these
things happened. Maybe they didn't.
Also, who cares? Me. I care. I'm the one
who's affected by this." And what's
crazy about this, it's kind of a weird
thing with like parents is that you
think by hurting yourself, you get back
at them for hurting you. And you do hurt
them when you hurt yourself, but you
hurt you more at some point. And this is
like this is like super real.
Let's say that you were parented tough,
whatever that means for you. You had
lots of bad things happen, okay? And it
was probably because you were a child
trying to deal with the world without
the skills of dealing with the world as
an adult. But you have these things
happen, right? And on some level, you
might believe that you becoming
successful, you making it work,
validates the way that you were
parented. And so you have this conflict
where you're like, well, I don't want
them to think that they did a good job
by me being successful.
And so then you want to keep not being
successful to prove to them and to hurt
them for hurting you.
and you stay there as long as you want
them to control you.
And so the day that you choose to
control yourself is the day that you
choose to divorce your results from the
very viable reasons that you have to not
win.
You are right. And so what? Number 13,
rejection versus regret. At some point,
everyone needs to choose whether they'd
rather risk rejection now or guarantee
regret later. And so, losers fear
rejection, winners fear regret. And most
attempts fail of anything. Failure is
literally a prerequisite for success.
And one of the one of my favorite quotes
of mine is greatness rejects all
first-time applicants. And so, it's kind
of like that person that just is like,
"Oh, I can't get a job." And you're
like, "What have you done?" They're
like, "Well, I applied somewhere." And
you're like, "What do you mean?" They're
like, "I applied somewhere." And you're
like, "And?" And and they're like,
"Yeah." And I and I didn't I didn't get
the job. They didn't even call me. And
you're like, "You went to one place?"
And you're like, and they're like,
"Yeah." This is going to be a really
good analogy for somebody who's
listening to this only for people who
don't have a business yet. A lot of
starting a business is the number of
reachouts that you had to do in order to
get the path, the job, the career that
you want right now. So, think about the
amount of interviews. Think about the
amount of outreach. Think about the
amount of job ads. Think about the
amount of resumes that you sent out.
Think about all of that. And all of that
work got you what I would consider one
sale. You got one person to say yes to
you and they would give you money for
work. All right? Now, obviously within
the context of an employee relationship,
but fundamentally actually works the
same way. All you do in a business is
the same thing. If you can handle that
level of rejection, then you can handle
the same level of rejection in a
business. It's not actually that
different. The question is whether you
can handle that level of regret years
later for not doing it. And I'll say
this, one of the things that I've
noticed between champions and everyone
else is that people everyone else is so
excited when they win. They're so
excited, you know, by the idea of them
getting first place. But there's a
reason that they never get first place.
It's because they're excited about it.
The people who always and very
consistently hit first place and win the
championships are relieved because they
tend to hate losing more than they love
winning.
and they expected to win because of the
level of preparation they had compared
to everyone else.
Which brings me very magically to number
14. Consistency beats talent. So listen
to this. You can beat most people at
anything if you just stick with it for a
year. You can become competent at just
about any skill in 20 hours. It's just
that people will wait 10 years to get
the first 20 hours logged, right? Like
if you want to learn how to play the
first few notes of a guitar, you can
learn in about 20 hours. Now, are you
gonna be Jimmyi Hendricks? Which Jenzie,
who's a guitarist, Purple Haze, you can
look it up. Anyways, the point is is
that people have this huge delay before
they begin. And what make things hard
isn't complexity, it's consistency. And
so, as boring as it is, you just have to
keep doing it before you get anything
back. So, one of my favorite quotes from
myself is the world belongs to those who
can keep doing without seeing the result
of their doing. You have to delay how
quick you get a reward, how fast you
need a cookie in order to keep going.
I've been told that I'm decent at
presenting and talking on stage in front
of people. And what a lot of people
don't see is that for years I spoke with
a microphone in front of a group of
people and I did it like multiple times
a day and I did that in the form of a
fitness session. And so I had to
literally stand on a box and shout
around and tell people what they had to
do. And I had to do that for years. And
I remember when I had to get on stage
for the first time and I had in high
school been very nervous to public
speak. And as I was about to get up on
stage, I was like, why am I not nervous
about this? Like this is weird. Like I
should I was like, I should be nervous.
Like why am I not nervous? And I was
like, I've I've done this so many times.
Like so many times. And I'm not talking
about, you know, Civil War history and
Abraham Lincoln. I'm talking about stuff
I know. Outwork your self-doubt through
repetition, not affirmations.
You don't do it through belief. You do
it through stimuli habituation, which is
just fancy words for saying you expose
yourself to the bad things so many times
they get used to and it's no longer a
bad thing anymore. It's just life. If
you want to get over a fear, the way
they do it is habituation. So, if I
wanted to get over, you know, being
afraid of spiders. I'm not afraid of
spiders, but some people are afraid of
spiders, right? If you want to get over
that fear, you literally lock yourself
in a room with a bunch of spiders and
all you do is you just have panic attack
after a panic attack and you pass out
and you wake up again. The tires are
there. You pass out. You keep doing
eventually eventually your nervous
system adjusts and 5 hours later, 8
hours later, you walk out of the room
unafraid because you have habituated.
And so, the point of practice for all of
these things is to habituate. as fast as
you can. And so we're trying to
microwave that period of time. And the
thing is, let's say it takes let's say
it takes this many reps. You can have
this many reps take you a year or you
can have it take you a month, depending
on how dedicated you are to it. Number
15, have no shame. All right. Now, I
have told this before, but my plan B was
that I would drive Uber and strip. Now,
I think part of that was because I
wanted to, you know, thumb my whatever
the the Shakespearean saying, I bite my
thumb at you. uh to bite my thumb at my
my very respectable parents uh and say
like I would take off my clothes for
money. Now, of course, they would be
horrified by that, but I think part of
the reason I was okay with it was I was
like, I'm gonna I'm going to do it my
way. I want to be crystal clear here. If
you have no money and you want to make
money, you should have no shame. Knock,
call, email, text, DM, ask.
Life-changing doors do not open
themselves. And sometimes I feel like
shame was invented by people who have to
prevent people who have not from taking
action because all of this is just an
illusion. What are you ashamed of?
Trying. Like let's play it out. Remember
I said fear only happens in the abstract
not in the specific. So if you reach out
to a stranger no matter what happens you
always come out better than before
because you either have a sale or you
have an experience.
Both make you better. And so the crazy
thing about trying is that it has an
asymmetric riskreward return. So worst
case is you get a no and you learn from
it. You get better. Life gives you
unlimited shots while you're alive. And
so if you have nothing, like you you're
just basically cashing in lottery
tickets and saying, "Oh my god, I lost.
But what you're paying with is time."
Fine. Pay more time. Get more tickets.
Keep scratching. So do you know the
difference between shame and guilt?
Guilt is when you break your own rules.
Shame is when you break other people's
rules.
So if you are gay and you're in a
religious community, you would probably
feel shame. If you also share that
religious community's rule set, you
would also feel guilt. If, let's say,
you were in a very liberal progressive
environment, you might feel neither
shame nor guilt. And so the question is,
whose rules are you following? If you
have this feeling, this fear of being
ashamed, then the question is, who's the
one who wrote the rules that you're
choosing to follow,
and I can promise you it's not the
people who are successful because
they're the ones shouting on the
rooftops telling you that it's totally
different once you get in the pool. It's
very different. And it's kind of like
you have the lights of the world turn on
and like you're living in this mirage
when you're not succeeding where there's
all this all this uncertainty. There's
all this ambiguity. There's this fog of
the unknown in front of you. But as soon
as you start taking action, things
become very crystal clear. I think
there's there's I'm sure some stoic
analogy that said this, but basically
like if you've ever walked through very
dense fog, you can only see a couple
steps in front of you. The only thing
that you can do in fog is just start
walking. And as you walk, more steps
become available to you. And so there's
this misconception that you're going to
be able to see the entire path ahead of
you. But it has two fundamental
fallacies in front of it. Number one is
that you have the right vision to be
able to see that far with your current
skill set and resources, which you don't
because imagine today all of your
conditions change. If you had more
skills, which is hard to imagine cuz you
can't imagine what it's like to have the
skill, but maybe let's say you have
resources that you didn't have before.
Well, that would probably change the way
you play the game. So, trying to play
out and try and play 17 steps in advance
when the game itself is going to change
and you as a player are going to change.
The only thing that you can boil all of
this down to is to take the steps that
you can see in front of you one at a
time. And I would write this down of
like what are the things that are
stopping me? And more specifically,
whose voice do I hear? Whose voice or
judgment am I afraid of? Because usually
it's people. It's society is what we
say, but it's usually like two people.
And I remember when I had this big
decision that I had to make when I was
considering selling gym lunch. I thought
that $46 million was not a lot of money
for the business. Now, some of you may
hear this and be like, "Oh my god,
that's amazing." But believe it or not,
at before we before COVID happened, uh,
Gym Launch was valed 150 million. And so
for me, going from 150 to 50 or, you
know, 46, it felt small, right? It felt
like a really small number. And I
remember there was a particular person,
we'll call it a friend of me, if you
will, that I thought would think that
they were better than me if I sold for
this small number.
And when I was able to narrow it down to
just that one person's voice, I thought
to myself, am I going to give that
person power over my entire life? Which
is literally what it was. I was choosing
not to make a decision because of
someone else. That person has complete
power over me. And I was like, well,
that's a terrible reason not to do this.
And the crazier part is that even if
you're right and that person does say
that you suck,
so what? Most people don't want you to
win. And even if you do win, they will
try and do a reverse excuse, which is
called a justification for why you
should be excused of the respect that
you should earn for having won. He just
has good genetics. He has great parents.
He uh, you know, inherited his wealth.
He had connect good connections. She was
born in America. He speaks English. He's
a man. He's white. He's whatever you
want.
But giving the person justifications in
no way helps you. You might be right.
And so what? Like it's it's so funny.
It's like let's say you have some
advantage, whatever it is, right?
Whatever whatever advantage you're born
with, right? You might have one.
It's kind of the thing same thing as the
parent thing. It's like, well, I don't
want to be successful because I don't
want to prove that I had this advantage.
It's like, would you prefer to prove
everyone wrong by saying I had this
advantage and I also wasted it? I
remember I'll tell you a story and I
think it'll probably that'll that'll
round this off well. So, when I was
younger, I didn't want to be a doctor,
but that was pretty much the path that
was laid out in front of me. And so, my
father's a successful doctor and I I was
like, it's it's it's cheating, you know,
to to, you know, just assume your
practice and just like immediately have
a practice that makes a lot of money.
and he said, "Do you think Shaq
when he was 7 feet tall was like,"It
wouldn't be fair for me to play
basketball. Other people aren't as tall
as me." And I always remember that. He's
like, "You play the cards you're dealt.
These are the cards you have. Play
them." And I remember thinking that as
now obviously I didn't decide to be a
doctor, but the reason that I didn't
want to do it was because I thought
other people would say that I would they
would disqualify away my success as not
earned by me.
when the reality is that they're all
going to disqualify your sex no matter
what because it makes them feel bad and
so [ __ ] them. But if you have some
cards, for the love of God, play them.
2026 is going to be an interesting year.
Reports just came out that for Black
Friday, 95% of purchases were financed.
67% of them were from people who didn't
plan on paying it off in the next 30
days, which is a very negative indicator
for consumer strength. And everything
starts with consumers and then it
bubbles up to B2B. And so if you're a
business in general, this will affect
you. And so there's good news and bad
news. The bad news is businesses that do
not change the way they behave when the
environment changes get left behind.
It's called adapt or die. On the other
hand, the good news is that when all the
other lagards and the slow to move
businesses don't respond, those
customers still exist. And so some of
the best companies that you've heard of
actually grew the most during economic
downturns because it's a redistribution
of customers and market share during
these truncated periods of time. And so
it's highly likely that in the next 18
months, 12 months, 6 months even, there
could be a softening of demand. And so
if your business is set up so that you
have more reliable lead genen from
multiple sources and a team that's in
place that can actually continue to run
the business and potentially continue to
increase your margins because of AI,
because of automation, then your
business can be one of the winners. So
if that's not in place in your business
and you'd like it to be, I'd love to
invite you out to two days here in Vegas
with my team to a scaling workshop where
we walk you through the things that
we're doing at acquisition.com and our
portfolio companies to help them scale
in 2026. So if that sounds at all
interesting, click book call. love to
have you out here. Before I had my $46
million exit, I went completely broke
twice. Starting from zero multiple times
taught me what actually matters. And so,
here's everything I learned. I hit $100
million in net worth at age 31, but
before that, I lost all my money twice.
And the difference between me losing all
my money the first two times and now are
these rules. So, this is no advice for
making money and keeping it. Number one,
passive income is a lie. If you think
about how money is made, you make money
during time because every minute we're
alive, a minute passes, time passes, and
we make money over that time period.
Which means every single person on
planet Earth has a dollars per hour that
they make. And so it's not that passive
income doesn't exist just as much as
active income doesn't exist. It's a
spectrum where it's how active is it or
how passive is the activity that I'm
doing relative to the time that I'm
investing. And so I would eliminate
active versus passive and simply say
what is my return on time or how much do
I make per hour. It's just that most
people get really scared of that like no
one should trade their hours for money.
Everyone trades their hours for money.
It's just that when they receive the
money it's just not denoted in hours.
And so I think there's two downstream
impacts in terms of changing your
behavior around this that I had to
apply. Number one is that I was obsessed
with trying to find quick, easy, low,
you know, effort money things. And so I
ended up spending tons of money on
things that I was obsessed with, hoping
would cost me no time to make. And I
would put not nearly enough time to the
things I was actively making money with
and thinking, how could I just make my
active income significantly higher. And
I would get obsessed with the idea that
everything I did actively had to be
scalable or it wasn't worth it. Because
if it's not scalable, then why why
should I bother? I shouldn't trade my
time for money. But if I looked at what
I was making over the last year and
divided it by the amount of money I made
per hour, this activity was 15 times
what I was averaging per hour. So I
should absolutely do as many hours of
that until all of my hours are that and
then I should find something else I can
trade my time for that's even higher.
And so if you want a very humbling
experience, look at how much you made
last year and then divide it by 2,000.
If you want to know how much you made
just in a 40-hour work week. Now, if you
want to look at how much you made per
actual hour of being alive, you can
divide it by around 8,000 or just take
that number and divide it by four. And
that's actually how much you make per
hour. And so when you're looking at is
this worth my time, if it's more than
that number, it probably is. And so what
I should have done and what changed for
me was that I stopped trying to invest
my money from my active into trying to
find more passive things and tried to
say how do I invest my money more into
my active to multiply my active that I
know is working. Number two, if you
can't buy it twice, don't buy it once or
even buy it three times or four times or
five times over, don't buy it once. And
the way that really shifted how I
started spending money, or rather
started saving money and not spending
money, was when I started looking at how
much time it took me to make the amount
of money post tax to buy whatever I
wanted. And I remember this clear as
day. I was working at Smoothie King as a
blender tender and I was making 675 an
hour and I had just gotten a raise from
625 an hour. Uh I'm dating myself.
Anyways, and while I was there, the
co-workers that I had and I would always
go to lunch next door at Coy, which was
like a sandwich shop, and it was like 13
bucks for a sandwich, right? And a drink
and chips and whatever, right? And so I
remember looking at my check and my 675
an hour after taxes and fees was like
six bucks an hour. And I was like, man,
I gave up two hours of my six-hour shift
every shift to go buy lunch. And I was
like, I'm literally giving a third of my
earning away for lunch every single day.
If I knew that I had to work the first
two hours just to get the sandwich, I
don't think I'd ever make that trade.
And yet I was making it every day. And
then I started thinking I'd go to the
mall and be like, "Oh, do you want a new
shirt?" And it was at the Gap and it was
30 bucks. And I was like, "Okay, well
shoot, that's a whole shift." And I was
like, "Would I work a whole shift if
someone just held up a shirt that I
didn't need to do it?" And I was like,
"I don't think I would." And so all of a
sudden it started shifting how my buying
happened because I I started feeling the
pain associated with what it would take
if I had to do that before getting the
thing I was going to buy. And it it
completely changed my buying behavior.
And to be very clear, saving money won't
make you money, but saving money allows
you to have money. And having money
allows you to look further out. And when
you look further out, you can take on
bigger risks, which absolutely will make
you more money. And when you're looking
at the price of whatever the thing
you're trying to buy is, obviously when
I was a teenager looking at a shirt, I
was looking at, okay, I'm making six
bucks an hour. A shirt's 30 bucks. But
when you're an adult and you're making
$100 an hour and you're looking at a
$500 or $1,000 purchase, would you work
two days in order to do that? I don't
know. Would I? Probably not. And
sometimes you think, hey, is uh would I
work all day for two days to go out with
the boys for three hours on Saturday? I
I'd probably be like, "Guys, I'm not
going to work for two days just to go
have three hours of fun, right? That
feel like I'd rather just not work the
two days." And that was the thing is
whenever I had the well, I'd rather just
not work than do that thing, then I was
like, I shouldn't buy that thing. For
example, when I was poor, I only spent
cash. And so, my easiest way of actually
creating a budget was that I had a
personal training client who paid me
$2,000 a month in cash. And so 100% of
my money that came in through the
business and credit cards and everything
else is just what went into my bank
account. And the only thing I knew I
could live on was was inside of my
wallet. And so as that got replenished
and the thing is is that I'm so scared
with money or I was so frugal with money
that I would always make sure that I had
more than that to make it for the next
payment because sometimes the guy would
take a day or two. You pay on Wednesday
rather than a Monday or whatever. And I
need to make sure that I have food for
Chipotle. Three, most people
overestimate what they can accomplish in
a year and they underestimate what they
can accomplish in a decade. And every
new employee that I have that walks into
acquisition.com, the number one thing
that they say they want is growth. And I
have this talk with them, which is the
10-year million-dollar contract. But
it's less about the million dollars and
more about take whatever your net worth
is now and add a zero to it or add two
zeros to it. You can accomplish that in
a decade. If you look at the biggest
companies in the entire world who were
worth multiple billions from their
inception until the time they were worth
multiple billions, many times it's under
10 years, but it's still more than five,
more than seven. And so you can
accomplish life-changing crazy amounts
of wealth in a decade. And so if you
could write a contract to yourself and
say, "I will make no money for 10 years,
but on the 10th year, I will add a zero
or two zeros or three zeros to my net
worth. Would you do it?" And if the
answer is yes, which it almost
invariably is with every person who
comes into my business, then I say,
"Great. Now act like it." And so if you
knew that you would make this amount of
money over that period of time, you
would stop this obsession, myself
included, this is me giving my advice to
my myself who lost it twice. When I was
able to shift to, okay, what would I
have to do that would make it
unreasonable that I don't 10x in 10
years, then all of a sudden I started
making very reasonable bets that I knew
would compound unto itself over that
period of time. And then winning became
inevitable rather than a game of chance.
And so oftentimes you have potential
earning and then actualized earning. And
usually as you're realizing the
potential earning you have, you're
usually losing out on your investing
into that potential, right? You're
realizing the potential. And that's kind
of like the kid that learns one skill
and then immediately says, "I'm going to
start a business opportunity around this
one skill that makes me $5,000 a month."
or they have this one skill and say,
"Hey, this this company is willing to
pay me $100,000 a year to go do this
skill where I have this other company
that'll give me a free internship where
I could 10x my potential earning in
three years, but I'm going to make
$35,000 a year for the three years.
Which one would you take?" The problem
is most people will take the $100,000
now and forego the investment in self.
And that's the thing is we are the asset
that we invest in. And the currency we
invest into ourselves in is time,
experience, and skills, right? Skill is
the outcome. The time and the effort is
what we put into it to gain the
experiences which ultimately give us the
skills. But if you're in an environment
where you're not compounding your
potential earning, then you're actually
losing out long-term. You're ripping up
your million dollar or your 10x or 100x
contract for a decade from now so you
can get the short fast money today. And
that's why in the early days when you
have limited amounts of money but lots
of time and energy, instead of putting
your money in the S&P 500, I like to say
put in the SME 500 because the asset
that is you will always beat the stock
market. Number four, you should only
have to get rich once. In other words,
don't bet what you have and need for
something you don't have and don't need.
And some of the gravest mistakes I made
manifested in, for example, me getting
into a partnership that I shouldn't have
gotten into because I wanted even more
faster. Now, when you get into a
partnership, which is usually the time
where you put the most risk on the
table, one is you guarantee the largest
decrease in your earning power. You pay
with the most expensive thing you have,
which is equity, to somebody else. And
so people get obsessive about what
they're they're, you know, 5% 10% later
when we're making money, but day one
they're like, "All right, we cut the pie
in half. Oh, we cut the pie into
thirds." Right up front before
anything's really happened. If you work
with a partner or decide to partner up
with somebody, one of your friends, one
of your co-workers, this is coming from
somebody who has nine failed
partnerships before I met Leila and then
that has now worked and now I have
successful partnerships. A partner needs
to have one of these three things that
you do not have. They either have to
have money that you don't have. And then
the clear contribution is that money,
they need to have experience you don't
have. And the clear contribution is that
experience. Or number three, they have
time and energy that you don't have and
the clear contribution is that time and
energy. And so I added that second part
on is that just because someone has
experience, if they're not contributing
it to the partnership clearly, then
you're still not going to get the
benefit from it. If they have the time
and the energy, but it's not clearly
defined how they're going to invest that
time and energy into the things so you
both get a return, then it's not going
to be a good partnership. And I've lost
so much money in partnerships,
especially early on. One of my two big
losses was from a partner. And a big
part of it was I was insecure and I
thought I just had to have somebody else
cuz I was afraid to do it on my own. If
you are a business owner and you're
trying to scale and you're doing a
million bucks a year and you want to go
bigger, go to acquisition.com, hit
scale, and uh we'd love to see if we
could help you out at one of the
workshops we run here in Vegas. Which
brings me to number five. If you never
learn to manage your time, you're never
going to learn to manage your money. And
so the thing is is that all of us
obviously have equal amounts of time
that we're given, not necessarily in
life, but at least every day. And so the
people who get the best returns on their
money are the ones who learn how to best
invest their time. And so a big
misconception around money is that money
in my opinion is an encapsulated version
of time. And since all of us trade time
for the money that we get, then it means
for each person money represents a
certain amount of time. And the
wealthier you get, it's just that the
denomination of money represents less
time for you. And so for someone else,
$100 may represent four hours. For a
wealthier person, $100 may represent
four minutes. And so it's a constant
appraisal that you do on a regular
basis, looking on your calendar and
saying, "What things do I have here that
I could trade my time for for more
money?" And so again, this video is
about making money overall. I'm not
saying that you can't spend time with
your girl, but there is a transaction
cost for that time. and as long as
you're willing to make the the trade,
then trade it all day. But the bad
trades are the one that when you
actually think about it in terms of what
it costs, you'd say, "I wouldn't do the
trade." That's a bad deal. And so over
time, if you continue to trade up how
much time you invest for what it makes
you, you will always make more in your
income year after year after year.
Number six, check your bank account
before you check social media first
thing in the morning. And if it hurts
you to check your bank account first
thing, then you need to do it even more
because for me, I started not knowing
where my money was going. And so I had a
friend who was like, "Dude, just look."
And I honestly had anxiety looking in my
bank account, looking at what money was
going out and all that kind of stuff.
And so I started making that habit. And
I had to confront it. But the crazy
thing is is as I started looking at my
money, as I started paying attention to
my money, my money started paying
attention to me and hanging around. And
so Peter Ducker said, "What gets
measured gets managed." And so one of
the most fascinating things that I found
with human behavior in any kind of
change is that the first thing that you
can do to improve any metric for any
skill is to actually measure it. And so
if you want to lose weight, if you weigh
yourself every day, no matter how
painful the number is. That intervention
alone helps people lose weight. You
don't even have to talk about diet. You
don't have to tell someone to exercise.
If they look at the scale every day,
they become aware of it. And when you
become aware of a problem, you start
consciously or subconsciously making
moves to change it. You have that
hesitation before you put that food in
your mouth. You have that hesitation
before you take your wallet out when
you're looking at your bank account
every day. It doesn't matter what it is,
whatever you're trying to improve, but
look at it. confront reality and then
reality will start to improve. And if
you're curious, how long do you still
check your bank account in every day?
And I the honest truth is I stopped
checking when we had about 20 million
bucks. Um and so that started when I had
in the hundreds to thousands
uh and continue to check every day. And
when I stopped checking it was I
realized my daily fluctuations in in
market movements and things like that
across my assets. uh it like I didn't I
I basically wasn't able to really see it
on a daily basis. So I had to start
extending my time horizon for when I
would check it. So it' be monthly or
quarterly that I started checking it. Uh
because that way at least I know I
should have some movement upwards. And
that is something that if you've done
checking your bank account every single
day for years, you start to already have
developed some of those disciplined
skills, which then you can delay
gratification of having saved money for
a day to having saved money for a
quarter. Number seven, learn how to make
money before you start trying to learn
how to make money make money. So, I see
so many guys, especially young guys, who
are like, "I've got a,000 bucks. How do
I invest the $1,000?" They're trying to
figure out a way to get that $1,000 to
compound. They put into a compounding
calculator and they're like, "Man, if I
get 50% returns for the next 40 years,
I'm going to be a billionaire." But the
thing is is that one, it's most likely
that you're going to buy a [ __ ]
Dogecoin and then it's going to tank and
then you're just going to lose your
$1,000 and be like, "Wow, think about
this. I just worked for two weeks or one
month to save that $1,000 and I lost it
in seconds." So, alternatively, if you
take that $1,000 and you put it into how
do I make more money? How do I actively
improve the actions and skills that I
have, that will get you far more? And
that is where you invest the time rather
than how do I make money make money? Cuz
let's be real, you don't have much. So,
take the money you have into the skill,
the flow of making more money rather
than trying to take this tiny thing and
going from a 10% return to a 20% return.
Because the hundred bucks extra that you
yield on that thousand dollar, I promise
you, if you learn how to add 50% to your
skill set, it'll take whatever your
annual earning is up by 50%. And that's
going to be a hell of a lot more than
10. And that's assuming everything goes
up this year, which one out of four
years it doesn't. When you say you don't
have time, just immediately think to
yourself, I'm lying. This is [ __ ]
Because every single person has between
5 to 9:00 a.m. and 5 to 9:00 p.m. every
day of the week. even if you have a
40-hour job, even if you're a full-time
student, because everybody has those
eight hours per day. Now, the thing is
is that we're not willing to make the
trade-offs because we have these things
that make us comfortable. Cool. If you
reframe that thing as the thing that
makes me comfortable today is the thing
that's going to make me uncomfortable
for a decade. All of a sudden, the cost
of that comfort goes up. And so, then it
flips to if I can become uncomfortable
for today, I can be comfortable for
decades. And so then you can seek out
those eight hours and say, "You know
what? I'm going to flip this thing." And
here's the crazy part about work. Work
makes you money in two ways. One, you
work and you make money. And secondly,
when you're working, you're not spending
money. And so when you're starting out,
you literally have a double effect. The
the money that you're making the whole
way through is stacking up because
there's no drains on it either. And so
one of the biggest advantages you have
is that you stay busy. One of the keys
to investing is patience. What is
patience? Patience is figuring out
activities to do in the meantime. Think
about it for a second. Unpack that.
Patience is figuring out what to do in
the meantime. So then if the goal is to
get rich, and we know that that takes
time, and it takes time for money to
compound and grow, then what you do in
the meantime is that you work so that
you have even more money to invest. And
that money has the time to invest and
compound while you're working. And I am
so passionate about this because this
isn't something that I didn't do, right?
Like when I had my job in the beginning,
I just wasn't really taking the time
that I should have. And then I was like,
you know what? I don't want to do this
thing forever. I got to get ahead. But I
couldn't stop doing my job. So I started
spending my mornings and my evenings
every day and both weekend days working
on what I was going to do next. And in
the beginning, that was studying for the
GMAT because I thought business school
was going to be the next move. But after
studying for the GMAT and crushing the
test, I came to another realization,
which was, I'm going to go to business
school because I want to start a
business. Well, you know what? It's
going to cost me less than two years and
$180,000 plus what I didn't make during
the two years of not working. I could
probably net $10,000 a year of income,
which is what the average business
school person graduated with when I was
looking at business school. And I was
like, I think I could get to 10 grand a
month if I had two years to work and
didn't spend 180 grand and I took that
money and just put it into a business.
Now you're like, "Well, you didn't even
have 180 grand." You're damn right I
didn't. I was able to save up 50 and I
was like, "I think with this 50, I'll be
able to spend it to learn enough to make
10 grand a month." And that's what I
did. Nine. If you don't know how you can
lose money in something, then you're
going to lose it. Think about this for a
second. If something looks amazing and
you're like, "Dude, there's no way I can
lose money on this." You're absolutely
going to lose your ass because of how
little you actually know. And so you
have to figure out one, what is my
downside and all the different ways that
downside can occur and then attach a
reasonable likelihood that that happens
and then probably multiply it by three
because whenever you have your
rosecolored glasses on, you're an
entrepreneur or you want to be an
entrepreneur, one of the quintessential
traits of entrepreneurship is optimism.
We are optimists. We think it's all
going to work out and you have to have
that level of optimism to start. But
when you start, you can't continue to
have that optimism around every other
opportunity because then you are going
to lose your ass because you're going to
be split between multiple things. And so
if you don't know how you can lose
money, you absolutely will because it
just is an index of how little you know.
10. The biggest cost that you have is
ignorance. So every single month you've
got your rent, you've got your food,
you've got your clothes, you got your
car, you got whatever else you spend and
you think that's my fixed costs. Years
ago I was sitting in the audience and I
saw a man write a million on a
whiteboard and he called someone from
the audience. He said, "How much do you
make per year?" And they said, " $50,000
a year." And he said, "Would you like to
make a million a year?" And the person
said, "Yes." And then he put a minus
sign and he said, "Did you know that
it's costing you $950,000 per year to
not know how to make a million dollar a
year?" And it was such a light bulb
moment for me that I realized that the
cost of ignorance is the difference
between what your goals are and what you
have today. Because if you knew how to
achieve your goals, the difference is
the value of that education. And
conversely, the difference is the cost
of that debt of ignorance. And so the
number one priority in my life has
always been to pay down ignorance as
fast as I possibly could using whatever
currency I needed to. So if that was
relational capital that means using my
network or doing favors for people or
paying money which is the least
efficient way of doing it. I would try
and find a way that I could pay down
ignorance to achieve the things that I
wanted so I could get the information so
I could get the learning. When I started
um I paid to get into rooms. I paid
$25,000 $35,000. And you're like wait I
don't have that right now. I get it.
Well you pay $10,000 was the first thing
I ever bought that was information
based. That's what I was the first thing
I ever invested. And how was I able to
do that? Because I had saved for two
years and I'd saved 50 grand up. And so
for me, I was like, "Okay, this is the
direction I'm going in. I'm going to
invest in learning." And when I got in
that room, the first room I was in was a
gym owner room, and I didn't have a gym.
And I paid to be in that room so I could
start the gym the right way. When I paid
to the $25,000 room, it was an internet
marketing room. And guess what? I didn't
have an internet marketing business, but
I paid there so I could try and learn
how to do it the right way rather than
try and start it the wrong way and have
to fix it. And so, I think a lot of
people wait too long to try and learn. I
always want to grab my future and pull
it towards me. And so I was willing to
spend as much money as I had available
to me to make those bets because it was
a bet on me and I knew I would never
lose that. You can't lose you. You
always have diamond hands on you. Like
till the day you die, you've got you.
And so the thing is about investing in
education is that sometimes the lessons
you learn aren't the lessons you expect
to learn, but you learn them
nonetheless. And so sometimes you go
into an education thing and you don't
get what you thought, but you still get
something and it was still more than
what you paid. And so when I went into
those rooms, I'd already used up all my
money to get in the room. So I was like,
"Okay, what else do I have?" And so at
the time I knew how to sell. And so I
just went to every single person in the
room and was like, "Can I help you sell
stuff?" And so they'd be like, "Well,
sure, my sales team sucks." Or, "Sure,
my my script sucks." Or, "Sure, my offer
sucks." Or, "I don't know how to
overcome these objections." And so I
would spend an hour, 2 hours, 3 hours on
the phone with these people training
their teams, writing scripts. And they
were like, "Dude, thanks so much. This
is way I can't believe you did all
this." And the thing is is that if
you're going to pay for help from
someone, pay in full.
Don't halfass a free gift. And so if
you're good at something, you're good at
a skill, you're an accountant, you don't
do one page of someone's taxes. If
you're going to do a favor, you do the
whole thing. You treat them like they're
a paying customer and then they will
respond as though you have paid them.
And so it will be like you've given them
money and then you will get that
reciprocity. And at the time when I did
those favors for all those people, I
didn't know what I was going to ask for.
I just knew that I would need someone's
help in the room. And I'd rather have
more phone numbers I could call for help
that owed me one than none. And when I
wanted to make a webinar, I called one
of the people who's good at webinars.
When I wanted to run ads, I called the
guy who's really good at running ads.
When I wanted to uh figure out funnels
and landing pages and stuff, I called
the guy who was really good at funnels
and landing pages, cuz each of those
guys wasn't good at what I was good at.
And so we're able to barter, which by
the way, still to this day is the most
efficient form of trade because Uncle
Sam don't take any piece of it for us or
them. Everybody wins. 11. There's two
types of things that you can learn. And
so if you're trying to pay down
ignorance, you got to know what you're
buying. So you can learn about
something, something that exists that
you didn't know existed. And then you
can learn how to do something. And so
one is called declarative knowledge,
knowledge of existence. The other is
called procedural knowledge which is
knowing how to do it. And so if I
explain to you that private equity
exists and this is how you can buy,
package and sell a business for a lot of
money. Now you know about it which is a
prerequisite for learning how to do it.
And so when you buy into access to
networks to people to relationships the
primary thing that you're learning is
learning about things that exist.
They're going to tell you tax
strategies, investment strategy,
marketing strategy, sales strategies,
business models that you haven't heard
of. That is what you learn there. But if
they tell you those things, you leave
and you get excited. But then you're
like, well, shoot, how do I do it? Which
is the second thing that you learn how
to do, which is the how part. And so
when you're going into any kind of
investment, whether you're investing
time, you're investing trade, you're
doing some work for someone so they do
work for you back, or you're investing
money, you better be sure what you're
buying. And the interesting thing about
those two types of knowledge is that the
declarative knowledge tends to teach you
things that you didn't know existed.
It's the unknown unknowns. That is why
some of these are the biggest
breakthroughs. When you get into those
rooms with someone making 10 or 100
times more than you, they see the world
in a different way. Whereas when you go
for how to, it's more predictable what
you're going to get because you're
specifically trying to learn how the
skill is. You know it exists and you
just need to clarify the steps to
getting there. And so just delineating
what you're trying to learn will help
you actually learn it. So the first time
I learned declarative knowledge was that
Facebook ads existed. That was in 2013.
And so I learned how they how they
worked and I learned just enough to make
them work. So I learned declarative
knowledge that they existed and I
learned how to do them in one weekend.
Super valuable. Now I was able to ride
that skill set for a couple years until
I was like you know what I need to learn
how to do this at a bigger scale. I
wanted to go national with started gym
launch do the turnarounds. And so I was
like, I need somebody cuz I had only run
local ads, which by the way are much
easier than national style ads. And so I
tried to go all around asking people for
help. And at this point, I had probably
used up the relational capital that I
had before. So I called a bunch of
agencies. All of them said they were
going to charge me too much money that I
could afford. And then finally, I just
asked one guy, "Hey, instead of your
monthly rate of $5,000 a month, which I
couldn't even come close to affording at
the time, I was like, can I just pay you
per hour?" Now, of course, he said, "I
don't trade my time for money." except
of course he works overtime and then he
gets money later but sure anyways he
doesn't trade time for money and I said
it's America everything's got a price
and he said you know what 750 an hour
I'll do it and I was like done now mind
you 750 an hour was still a ton of money
for me and so I showed up like it was
Harvard on steroids for these calls cuz
I I would prep for the call I had my
notes out I recorded it I was like I had
two people in the room be like make sure
I don't miss anything right and so I
would go and I had him first document
the process of what he did to run ads as
though he were me. Then I had him
demonstrate it. So he clicked the
buttons so I could see what he was doing
and I had him stop and explain to me
each of the steps so I could put it into
my little checklist too. And then
finally I duplicated in front of him
which means document demonstrate
duplicate. I then did in front of him to
make sure that I was doing it right. And
so once I did it right and I did it
right multiple times in a row and I
didn't need him to to to correct me
while I was doing it, that's when I had
mastered the skill. It took me eight
sessions. So, it took me eight hours and
whatever that is times 750 in order to
learn 12. A watch isn't going to replace
work. A Rolex isn't going to replace
reality. And so, what happens a lot of
times when you're coming up is that you
want to get status, right? You feel
downtrodden. You feel like no one
respects you. And that's normal as a
young man. That's what you do. You don't
have any status. That's what you come
into the world as. And you got to go
make it. And so the thing that you want
to do early on is get status as fast as
possible. The thing is is a lot of times
you trade short-term status at the
expense of long-term. And so as somebody
who has lots of young men in my audience
and middle-aged men in my audience,
you'll never impress someone who's
wealthier than you with assets.
You'll only impress people below you. So
you have the wrong target audience
because to impress poor people, you
outspend them. to impress rich people,
you outwork them. And once I understood
this, I was like, "Oh, the guys who are
at the top of the game give me respect
because they know I'm a future one of
them because they know when they were my
age, they double down on the hustle, not
the highlight reel." And that
overspending on status happens at every
level. So, in the beginning, it's a
watch, right? And a little bit later, it
might be a car payment. And a little bit
later, it might be a really big
expensive car payment. And then it might
be a really big condo and then it might
be a really nice house and then it might
become a yacht and then becomes a jet.
And the thing is is that you add zeros
to it but again you only impress the
people underneath of you not the people
above you. And if you want to impress
the people underneath of you by all
means do it. But know that that's what
you're about. Buy time like a rich
person. Buy stuff like a poor person.
And so when you're thinking about time
being the most valuable thing, if you've
already dedicated yourself to working
and earning an income and learning the
skills, then you just want to pour as
much time into that as you can. And so
fundamentally, you're buying your time
back, your lowcost time or low income
time. So it's prepping food, going
grocery shopping, cleaning your house,
whatever else you do with more income
earning time. I remember the first time
I closed a $500 sale at my gym. I
realized that that sale took me 30
minutes. And I knew that for me to buy
groceries for the whole month four times
would take me $500 and far more than 30
minutes. And so I thought to myself, my
god, if all of that time I was grocery
shopping and and food prepping and and
and and cleaning up after myself and
then doing laundry, if all of that time
I could just sell more in a couple
hours, I could do all of that stuff for
free. And my poor mind was like, "Hey,
that's wasteful. You could be doing that
stuff on your own." But you buy time
like you're rich. You spend money on
stuff like you're poor. So buy time, not
stuff. Because when you buy time, you
can replace the money you bought it with
and some. Let me put some real numbers
to this. So the average American spends
$1,500 a month on 96 hours of work. And
that breaks down roughly to cleaning
their house, cleaning their clothes,
buying food, preparing food, and
cleaning food. I'm not even going to get
into the 4 hours a day that the average
person spends on social media and
watching television. You're going to
keep doing that, so I'm not even going
to try to convince you not to. But if
you just replace those things that you
probably don't want to do, it costs
about $1,500 per month. And so as long
as you make more than $15 per hour,
because it cost about 96 hours to
replace those activities, which means if
I can replace 96 hours of work for
$1,500, and it's also 96 hours of
draining work. Like it expends energy.
It's not like you just sit there for 96
hours, you're actually getting actively
tired from doing that stuff. If you took
that same thing and if you make more
than $15 per hour in your active job, it
makes sense. It's the logical decision
for you to buy that and then go make
more because you're also going to make
money twice. Not only are you going to
save the time and then work and make
more, but you also get better at your
job because all of those extra hours
aren't just making you more money.
You're also becoming more skilled. So,
you get better faster. And so if I have
a year-long guy where he spends $1,500 a
month to replace all of those things at
the end of that year, not only does he
have more money at the end end of the
year, but because he had an extra 100
hours of high energy time that he didn't
have to spend per month, he's getting
50% better per year. And so that assumes
that he doesn't get rewarded in his work
for getting better, which by the way, in
reality, you typically do as long as you
ask. who you compare yourself to, not
who you spend your most time with, will
be the highest predictor of how much you
make. And so we are motivated by the
things that we lack. And so if you're
very hungry, it's because you lack food.
If you lack sleep, you're very tired.
You're very motivated to sleep. And so
if you want to be motivated to make
money, it's not enough to not have
money. You have to have a desire to make
a lot more money. And the strongest way
to create that desire is to visually see
the people who are making far more than
you. And so it's about who you compare
yourself to, not who you spend time
with. Fundamentally, the richest man in
the world only spends time with people
poorer than him. But he continues to get
richer because he's comparing himself to
the future version of himself. That's
his reference point. That's his
reference group. And when you start out,
there's real people. As you evolve, it
becomes imaginary. I heard this quote
from one person to another when I was
walking through the street and he was
talking about buying something that was
a no a no return investment. Let's call
it a big toy. And he said there will
always be time to make money later. And
I remember hearing that and thinking
that's what someone who's poor says.
And so to be clear, I think if you want
to enjoy life, by all means do it. This
video is about making more money. That's
the stated objective. And so that's what
I'm talking about. And so the idea that
you're going to spend now, work later is
the fundamental crux of poverty.
And so you have to break that with all
your heart. And when you have those
people around you, and this was a toy,
but it could be let's go out, we it
always comes under the guise of yolo. We
have to live life. But everyone who says
that assumes that getting better and
learning is not life
and is not living. And for me, the
purpose of my life is to learn as much
as I can and pay down ignorance as much
as I possibly can and squeeze the last
drop of potential out of me that I can.
And the way that I do that is through
learning. And so for every person that
asks you to sacrifice working now so
that you can have fun now, just make
sure you know the trade you're making.
I'll be real with you. There's no
perfect way to live your 20s or even
your 30s. You either end up an
underkilled 30-year-old or 40-year-old
or an underlived 30-year-old or
40-year-old. And so, fundamentally, it's
not either or, but knowing the trade-off
and living with the consequences because
you can't do them over. And on a
personal note, I sacrificed or said
differently, invested my 20s in order to
have lots of skills and underlived.
But in that same time period, I built to
where I am now. And I genuinely am very
happy with where I am now in life. And I
would not redo those years to have quote
lived more because the real secret is as
I was doing it, I loved the game. And so
some of the best moments of my life when
I look back were some of the moments
that I felt like I was struggling the
most because it was when I underwent the
most growth. And so it's interesting
because the pain that you go through in
the moment often becomes the purpose
that you look back on in your life. And
so the idea that we want to avoid pain
so that we can live today I think
conflates reality because when you look
back on your life a lot of times those
are the things that define you. And so
we should be seeking those out not
running away from them. So if you're not
sure who you compare yourself to versus
who you spend time with when you're
about to make a big decision, the people
who come up in your mind who you're
weighing their opinions on your
decision, those are your reference group
people. The people whose opinion you
care about. And so if all your friends,
for example, are billionaires and they
all sacrificed their 20s, got rid of
their friends, got rid of their material
belonging, spent all their time working
for free so that they could learn this
big skill set and then doubled down in
their late 20s and then made it big by
the time they were in their 30s and 40s.
Those people, if that was your reference
group, if you're thinking about leaving
home, what do you think that reference
group's going to say? For sure. And
because of that, you're out the door.
And so whenever you have these
frictional moments where you are like, I
think I should do this, but whoever that
person is, whoever that voice is, if
they don't have what you want, don't
listen to what they say. Only listen to
other people's opinions about your life
if their dreams for you are bigger than
yours. If they're not, disregard.
Invest, then spend the rest. So the idea
is that you invest first and then spend
what's left over. And so an interesting
thing is that Switzerland has the
highest per capita millionaires in the
world without having the highest GDP or
even GDP per capita. And so how are they
able to do that? That means that they
have different rules around money, which
is what this video is about. And so if
we adopt those rules, we can get those
outcomes, which means these are just
decisions that we get to make. And the
easiest way to do that is you take what
you need off the top and then you spend
the rest on what you want. And so it
comes down to saying that you need your
future. You need your future self to be
bigger than your current self today. And
so you invest first and then you spend
the rest. And so the way that I like to
think about this is point 16. This is
how we operationalize this, which is
automate investing and then create
friction around spending. And so you
want to take the money off before you
see it. If your job, for example, has a
way that they can automatically skim off
your paycheck and put it into some sort
of investment stuff, do it. If they
don't have that, have one of these apps
that does segmentation or has multiple
bank accounts that you can say, "This
automatically goes here. This
automatically goes here, and I don't
touch this." And if you want to get real
crazy, the advanced version of this is
that as you make more money, you keep
what you're living the spend the rest
part, instead of making it a percentage,
make it a fixed amount. And then as you
make more, you're just investing more
and more and more into the future. Now,
you're like, "Well, how do I invest in
the future if I'm just starting out?"
The future is you. But you're making
sure that when you're investing that
money, you know, whether you're buying
declarative knowledge or you're buying
procedural knowledge, you're learning
about stuff that you need to learn or
you're learning how to do it. And the
longer you do this, the easier it gets.
For the record, I have zero
Lamborghinis, zero Rolexes, zero jets,
while also being able to buy multiple of
these every single month. And so, the
idea is you start to become addicted to
getting good. And once you get that
first little reward of seeing an
investment that you made in yourself
start paying off, you see your income go
up, you start making more money, you're
like, "Oh my god, this game is awesome."
And so that flow of investment that
comes to you is one of the best games
that you want to win for yourself. You
want to just keep seeing keep making
cash flow PRs. Keep making that
investment account PR and hit records in
that account. And if you get addicted to
that game, if you can just do that from
everything in this video, you've already
won. And so you want to automate
deposits and manualize withdrawals. So
everything that is automatic in terms
like your rent, you want to write it as
a check. If you or drop it off as cash,
if you have payments that you make like
a car payment, as much as you're like,
"Wait, this is going to cost time." The
value that you get back for knowing
exactly where you spend your money is
going to make you more money than the
one hour a month that you have to pay
your bills. That is a promise. And so
that may also mean if you make it
difficult to buy, well then maybe you
delete some of the apps on your phone,
maybe you don't save your credit cards
on the sites that you tend to spend
money on. You want to make it as hard as
you can to spend money and make it as
easy as possible to stack it. Number 17,
it's easier to make a million than it is
to make $100,000. And let me explain. If
I told you to go down the block, you
would go at a certain speed. If I said
go as fast as you possibly can, at some
point you'd run and then you'd improve
your form and you get better footwear
and then you'd change your clothes, but
at some point you wouldn't be able to
run any harder or any faster to get
there. But if I said, "I need you to go
five blocks." You might be like, "Huh,
okay." Now, some people will then try to
walk or run that, but the smart cookie
then says, "Huh, I could take a car and
I would go a hell of a lot faster." And
if I'm speeding in my car, I'll probably
get to the fifth block before the other
guy gets to the end of the first block.
And so the magic of thinking bigger is
that you change your solution set.
Meaning you use different tools to
accomplish the objective. The reason
$100,000 per year is the hardest amount
of money to make is because it assumes
for most people that they will trade
their time in terms of hourly wages or
salary in traditional work in order to
get it. And so they have to spend all of
their time in order to make the
$100,000.
But if I said make a million or even 10
million before the world explodes, you
would know that you would have to use a
different way of solving that problem.
And so the reason it's easier to make a
million or $10 million is because you
can do it in less time with more skill
if you start solving for the skills
required to make a million or $10
million. You don't want to love money.
You want to learn to love making money.
So there's two misconceptions and then
one truth around this. The first
misconception is money is the root of
all evil. And then that obviously is a
quote from the Bible, 1 Timothy 6:10.
The 2011 version, someone says, "No,
it's not money that's the root of all
evil. It's the love of money that's the
root of all evil." But that's just the
2011 version. The actual translation,
there's five translations for it. And
four of the five are the love of money
is the root of all kinds of evil.
Meaning, if you desire money more than
anything else, then you will commit the
other sins in order to attain it. And so
the idea is that it's only a pathway
that has a high likelihood of causing
you to do things that are unethical or
immoral. And so there's this huge
terrible paradigm in society that money
is somehow good or bad. It is just
potential energy. It's just bottled
time. And that bottled time can build
bombs. That bottled time can build
hospitals. It can build wells. It can
build schools. It can make YouTube
videos that educate. And so the idea
that you're afraid to make money means
that you're afraid of having power. And
maybe you should be afraid of having
power because maybe you'd misuse it. But
if you do want to help the world, then
all it's going to do is amplify your
ability to do that. And if you have that
mission on your heart or in your mind,
then it's your duty to remove everything
else in your [ __ ] way to go get it.
The more money you make other people,
the more money you make. And so the
amount of money that you will be able to
make in your career comes down to three
variables. Number one is the value that
you're able to create in total for all
of the people you create it for. Times
your ability to negotiate how much of
that value you're able to get. Times
number three, which is the amount of
other people who can also create that
value. And you have to have all three
because for example, if you develop a
skill of sales and you can create
millions of dollars in value for a
company and you're really good at
negotiating, then in theory you'd get
millions and millions of dollars from
that company. But if somebody else is
willing to work for a few hundred,000 a
year in order to make that value, then
your position disappears. And so that
gives us the blueprint for making money
is that not only do you want to be able
to create that value, you want to be
able to create a value in a way that no
one else can. And the way that you do
that is not by, in my opinion, learning
some incredibly secret unique skill.
What makes skills unique is the skill
set. It's the stack of skills together
that create the uniqueness. If someone
else has to try and recreate something I
could do, they would have to have lived
my life. And so your life and the time
you spend becomes your competitive
advantage. It becomes your asset. It
becomes the moat that other people can't
chip into. They'd have to go through
being a competitive fitness person and
then go through owning lots of gyms and
then go through doing turnarounds across
the country and then go through doing a
licensing business and then go through
making a supplement business and then go
through launching a meal prep business
and then also starting a software
company and then going through an exit
for both and then starting a private
equity. They'd have to do so much stuff.
There are so many skills that are
required. Your time is your weapon if
you invest it wisely. And the one thing
that I would leave you with is that
money loves speed.
Wealth loves time. Poverty loves
indecision. I spend more time than I
deserve with billionaires and
multi-billionaires. And something I
noticed is that all of them share
similar behavior patterns. And there's
11 that I found. And the best part is
you can steal just about every single
one of them. Enjoy. I crossed $100
million in net worth at age 31. I'm 35,
significantly higher than that now. And
I have the privilege of talking to lots
of people who are at billion dollar
plus. And so in this video, I want to
break down a handful of themes that I've
seen repeated that can make you
significantly more successful. The rich
by time, the poor by stuff, ambitious
people by skills, and lazy people by
distractions. As much as these seem like
four different groups, it's really like
you have these pairings. Rich people use
money to buy time. Ambitious people use
time to buy skills. And the reason it's
ambitious people is because generational
wealth isn't transferred through assets.
It's not transferred through stuff. It's
transferred through education. It's
transferred through skills. And so
there's this Sanskrit proverb that I
love. If you have a good son, you don't
need to accumulate wealth. If you have a
bad son, there's no point in
accumulating wealth. And so the idea
that you're going to pass on your wealth
to a child who doesn't have the skills
makes it irrelevant because
fundamentally either it is a good son
who has skills and then if the son has
skills then whether you transfer the
wealth or not makes the wealth itself
irrelevant. And I find that there's so
many things that are like this in wealth
creation that you don't understand until
you're on the other side of it because
the answers that you're looking for are
not in your newsfeed. They are not in
the distraction. And so the vast
majority of lazy people that I have
encountered continue to distract
themselves because the difficulty of
looking at themselves in the mirror and
saying I am inadequate is too painful.
And so instead they would rather watch
fluff videos on the internet that make
them feel good and tickle their ears
rather than confront reality that they
are just not good enough. And so they
consume the stuff that's like I am
worthy. I deserve these things. In other
words, entitled to them, which by the
way, if you feel entitled to something,
then when you get it, you are never
grateful because you thought you
deserved it to begin with. We know that
gratitude, for example, is something
that increases your subjective
well-being in life, which is that you
enjoy life more when you are grateful
for what you get. Which means that you
have to, by very definition, expect
nothing, which means you're entitled to
nothing, which means that you deserve
nothing. In reality, you are worthy only
of the things that you currently have
because you have already gotten them.
You have proven that you can work a
minimum wage job, so you are worthy of
the compensation of minimum wage. And as
much as this is painful, and I'm sure
this will get clipped a hundred times to
show me as some evil rich guy, I'm
willing to take that hate for the few
people who will hear this message, and
decide to change the way they act. You
can be ambitious and distracted, which
keeps you poor. When I started out at my
peak, I had nine businesses because I
heard seven income streams make you
wealthy, but it doesn't. Seven income
streams just spread you seven ways. And
I had nine. I was like, "Well, seven
good. Nine must be better." To give you
context, I had a chiropractor agency. I
had a dental agency. I had a gym
turnaround business. And then I had at
the time six location. So there's nine.
Where it is? Boom. And I had partners in
each of these businesses. I was still
the one who was required to rain,
meaning I was the one who was required
to sell customers into all nine. If you
are required to work inside of the
business, then you can only really do
one job. And so when people hear that
someone has seven income streams, it's
because they own assets that generate
that kind of income. But in order to
gain the cash to then buy the assets
that create the cash flow, it requires
time and focus. Let me make focus real
for you. Focus is a very amorphous term.
Focus is measured by the amount of
things you say no to. And inversely, you
could measure it by how few things you
say yes to. meaning the most focused
person says only yes to one thing and
says no to literally everything else.
And so the next thing that separates the
rich from the poor is it's 100x not 2x.
And so this concept is one that I had
dinner with a friend of mine who's a
public CEO and I asked him what he had
done to grow the business. I think from
a $200 million market cap to a $1.2
billion market cap in less than 2 years.
All right. So that's absurd growth for a
company. And I was like, "So, you know,
what what are you doing primarily?" And
he said, "I'm shaking hands. I'm kissing
babies. I'm going to events all the
time." And I was like, "Well, how many?"
He's like, "Well, I'm going to do uh 66
events this quarter." And I was like,
"In person." He was like, "Yeah." I was
like, "Are they coming to you?" And he's
like, "No, I'm going to them." I want to
make this real. He has a wife. He has
kids. And before anyone listens and
says, I can't believe he Well, cool. He
makes trades. If anything, I would hope
that people watch this and say, "I
wouldn't make that trade." In which
case, great. Also, don't complain about
not having what somebody who has made
that trade made. And so, one of the big
misconceptions, by the way, this is a
sales thing, too, is that people want
your outcome their way. They want to
have their cake and eat it, too. They
want to say, "Hey, I want to not change
the way I'm eating. I want to not change
the way I'm living, but I want to have a
six-pack, and I want to be in shape. I
want to continue to live this way, and I
want to get the 10 chick or the 10 guy.
I want to continue with my work life
schedule as I currently have, but I want
to have hyperrowth." They are trades.
They're price tags. When you go to the
store, you either want the shoes and
you're willing to pay the price or
you're not willing to pay the price.
That's it. You can't pick the price for
the shoes. You pay it or you don't. My
telephone back to myself is that I
thought I worked a lot when I was
younger. And I did spend a lot of time
working, but I made so little progress
because a lot of that time I wasn't
actually creating output. I encourage
people to do something called the 12x30.
All right? It's It's very simple and
it's actually not as unsustainable as
people would think. You work 12 hours a
day for 30 days straight, no weekends.
By the last day, you realize one, you
aren't made of glass. Two, how much more
you could be working, three, how much
faster you could be achieving your
goals. Four, how much you could be
getting better every single day. Five,
you don't need to work like this
forever. But if you need to do it for a
season or for a reason sometime in the
future, you've got that gear in you. And
six, there are people who are working
more than you who are beating you. And
you get all of those lessons for the low
price of getting more done in a month
than you probably did last quarter. And
so everyone and like of course you've
got one, you know, one side of people
who are like, I work more than this now.
And of course they don't. They obviously
don't. And the thing is is that people
are like, well, I work like that, but I
take a couple days off. Right? That's
the point is that you have to push
through it. Now, can you work 16 by 30?
Sure. If you want to, you're welcome to
work more than that because I've found
that working six to six is kind of like
what I do every day anyways. I'm on 12
by 100, you know, in terms of how I
think about working. And there's plenty
of days that I work 15, 16 hour days cuz
I get here at 5 or 6 and then sometimes
we have an event, there's a dinner,
things like that afterwards and ends at
9. And that's where you have to be on,
not just at the office, not just in
front of your computer, but people
actually demanding things of you on a
regular basis all the time being on
camera. And I'll tell you that there are
levels to this. It's like working alone
for a full day is not as exhausting as
being on stage for a full day, being on
camera for a full day because every
second that you are not peak, you are
losing. You can take a break while
you're working alone. You can't take a
break when you're on stage, when you're
meeting customers, when you're making
content like right like every m minute
that is not recorded is basically a
minute wasted. There's a whole team here
behind this camera, right? That is
making this stuff for you and I'm
costing them every second I'm not
showing up. I remember there was a
period a season of my life where I think
I had like nine straight uh months of
this and it was not 12 it was 15 16
because I had to wake up at 4 to get to
the gym where I was at the gym but I
wake up at 4 and then I would get the
the class ready. I'd open the gym doors
at 4:30 start the classes at 5:00 and
the last class at night would end. It
would be a 7:00 class. It would end at
8:00 and then at 8 I would then do
billing. I'd reach out to old customers.
I would confirm lead appointments for
the next day. all that sometimes until
10, 11 at night and then I'd wake up
again at 4:00. And so I don't know what
the hours are there, but it's more than
12. And I did that for 9 months
straight. And I used to describe it as
the kind of tired a good night's sleep
couldn't fix. It was like it was tired.
It was deeper than like a one sleep. I
needed like weeks to like basically come
back to normal. And the thing is is that
I think it is valuable because you have
to learn that you have that gear. I
think that that gives you supreme
confidence when you're entering any new
endeavor because you know that you have
acquired the trait of being relentless
that you do not relent. You do not let
up. You do not stop until you get what
you want. And you know that you can push
through being tired or being underslept
or being overwhelmed because you realize
that you didn't die and that you've done
this before. And so the difference
between the newbie and the veteran is
that the veteran looks on something and
looks back on what they have done to get
to that point and says, "I've seen this
before. This is another one of those."
And that's why they don't have the
anxiety. That's why they don't have the
stress. That's so when they get on
stage, they crush it. That's when they
the high pressure situation, they still
breathe normally. Their heartbeat
doesn't go up because they have done it
before. And the only way that you can
get to the point where you can say
you've done it before is to do it now.
And so I define work as volume times
leverage. And so it's about how many
times you do something and how much you
get for each time you do it. In the
beginning, you need to do a lot more of
this, right? You do way more volume
because of that volume. you gain skill
and then the leverage also increases and
so you get 100x the volume which then
over time builds skill which then gives
you more for what you put in and then
over time that continues to increase
your output. The thing is this concept
of 100x not 2x has applied to so many
different areas of my life. Like when I
paid a large brand for insight into how
I could grow my personal brand when I
decided to get into this game I was like
hey I'm not growing that fast. Uh, and
he said, "Oh, well, pull up your social
media profiles." And we pulled them up
one by one and he said, "Look at what
you're doing. Look what I'm doing." And
he had genuinely been doing 10 times
more volume than I was doing. And so he
basically said, "You're not doing enough
volume." I then said, "Okay, that was
clear as day. I need to do more volume."
And the thing is is when we did more
volume, we got better at doing it. And
so now we continue to do the same volume
as I did in the beginning, which is 10
times more than when I started. We get
even more output. And then I had a
different friend who talked to me,
billionaire guy. He was thinking about
getting into content. And he said, "Hey,
I'm really not growing that fast." And I
had got to have the exact same
conversation with him. But the thing is
is that this guy had done 100x not 2x
before in his life. It was just that he
got to realize like me that it has been
100% domain specific. And so when he
then I showed him my Instagram and his I
showed him my Tik Tok and his I showed
him my YouTube and his and I said,
"Dude, I'm making 450 pieces a week.
You're making seven." And he was like,
"Got it." Like understood. He
immediately got it because he had
already learned that lesson in a
different domain. I want to I want to
zoom out for a second. Right now is a
period of time where I'm working really
hard. I'm working a lot. I'll give you
context as to what a lot is for me. So
this year, the first hundred days of the
year, I didn't have a day off. And so my
time was only spent working. And so it's
like, well, what's the difference
between when you were quote working all
the time when you're younger and working
all the time now is that what I get done
in a day is significantly greater than
what I got done. And the quality of that
work is also higher. Because the thing
is is that you learn how to work. You
get better at working the more you do
it. And so a lot of people are like,
"Man, I I feel like I'm not that
productive when I work. Like, what
should I do?" It's like, "Work more."
Like, you work more until you get better
at working. I remember when I was a
legal intern at a at a company in France
called Archma, Ama, if you want to how
they say it. And I was a legal intern,
and I was spending the whole summer
there, which by the way, they always try
and like use and abuse interns. I was
like, "Man, I'm I'm working so hard."
And I talked to one of these legal
partners. And I only had one exchange
with this particular legal partner
who's, you know, high up in the firm.
And she said, "Oh." She was like,
"That's cute. You don't even know what
work is." She said, "You don't even know
how to work." She's like, "You spend
time here." She's like, "But you don't
know how to work." I just remember how
dismissive uh what she said was. But I I
understood I mean I understand now
especially what she meant was like,
"You're spending a lot of time here, but
you're not getting anything done." And
it takes time. It takes reps to get
better at working itself. And so that
measure of focus, the equal opposite of
distraction is just how long you can
stick with it. And I can tell you that
me from a very visceral perspective when
I work, there are many times like you
know when you work and you're like,
"Man, I feel like I I like need a
break." The thing is just that that
break period for people who aren't as
good at working might be like the rest
of the day. And the better and better
that I've gotten at working is that I
can like kind of like whip my like whip
my head back in and be like confront
like keep going. And I'm like all right
I'm going to keep going. And then you
kind of realize that there's like a 5
minute sometimes 15 minute period where
like your output slows a little bit but
then you catch the next draft and then
you're in again. It's being able to whip
yourself back in. And that muscle of
doing that takes practice. And the only
opportunity that you get to flex that
muscle, to practice it, is to work
yourself to the point of fatigue, to the
point where distraction or respite or
rest would be beneficial or you feel
like it's what you crave right now. And
then being able to be like, "No, I can
power through this." And the thing is is
you can you can power through it. It
just takes practice. And practice takes
repetition and being willing to be
uncomfortable for an extended period of
time. And it's kind of like when you're
eating and you're dieting, there are
moments where you get these cravings
where you're like, "Man, I'm starving. I
want something sweet." If you've ever
dieted before, and this is where
repetitions help, it only lasts like 20
minutes. So, if you ever do this, by the
way, dieting hack is just set a timer
when you're like, "Man, I really want
something." Wait 20. And if you still
want it, which you rarely do because it
usually lasts less than 20, sometimes
just five. It'll just go away. And the
same thing happens with focus, but we
then just take off. We take off for our
diet for the day. we order a pizza,
right? We order ice cream, right? Or we
take off working for the day, right? And
we just say, "I'm just going to watch
Netflix for the rest of the time, or I'm
just going to go hang out with friends,
whatever, or I'm going to go out." But I
will say now that I have worked for a
100 days straight, and that was in the
earlier part of this year. I think this
year I've probably taken three or four
days off since the year started. And I
still probably worked until like two on
those days, but I still consider those
like more or less days off. You're not
going to die. And so I think back
retroactively or like historically like
there were people who were forced to
work for years on end or they would get
killed. As gruesome as that may seem, I
see that as hopeful in that they have
already demonstrated that it's possible.
Like you can work continuously for an
extended period of time because
fundamentally you're just alive, you're
moving, right? And like you think super
ancestors, it's like they didn't have
computers. They like they just were
around. And so you do keep busy while
you're awake. And so you might as well
keep busy continuing to nudge things
forward. And I can't tell you the amount
of times where now I'm like my mind
checked out and I was like, I my brain
checked out a little bit, but I'm going
to I'm just going to keep I'm going to
keep going. And then 3 hours, 4 hours, 6
hours more passed and I'm like, oh, I
actually finished everything that I said
I was going to do. And it's just so much
more work and it's fewer days off and
it's earlier mornings and longer nights.
And it it it just it's being able to do
that for an extended period of time. I
know the whole idea of like, you know,
work on the things you love and you'll
never work another day in your life.
That's just I just don't think it's
true. Like there's the so many things
that I don't enjoy doing that I have to
do. And that's why at least for me, my
saying is always um I will do what is
required. How I feel about it is
relatively irrelevant because the things
that have come from doing what is
required have made doing the
requirements something that I know will
pay off. And so I kind of like feast on
those morsels of past achievements as
the fuel to continue doing things that
may be uncomfortable or unpleasant in
the moment. And most work isn't
unpleasant. It's just work. It's like I
have to get this done right now. Like I
get to get this done. Sure. But like I'm
just being real for me. It's it's it's
usually not sunshine and rainbows. Like
I I work a lot and I I get and I'm
tired, you know? I I um I slept 9 hours
last night which was the first time I've
slept 9 hours in a while and I feel
amazing right now. But sometimes you got
to work on six. Sometimes you got to
work on five. And so think about this
hypothetical extreme. Let's say that you
played video games. That was all you
did. When I say that's all you did, you
didn't go out. You didn't talk to
people. You didn't see anyone. You
didn't eat. You didn't sleep. But you
would be incredibly focused. Now, at
that point, you say, "Well, in order for
him to play more video games, he needs
to sleep." So there are contingencies,
right? You do need to eat or you'll die.
And so there are the fewest requirements
necessary to maintain consistent focus
on the one thing. And those thing become
requisites for focus rather than
distraction. Like there are periods of
time where you will need to rest. That
rest therefore is productive because it
increases your total output in the one
thing that gets you the most leverage
that gets you closest to your goals in
the shortest period of time. And so this
isn't a video of me saying, you know,
work until you die. Well, you will work
until you die because we all will die
and we all probably will work at some
point. But it is more video of saying
that every single thing that is not a
requisite for you continuing to do the
one thing that one yes are all
distractions. They are all things that
take away. And people have a hard time
with this because they like to say like
you need to have balance. But this is
what poor people do not understand. And
I am going to do my very best to kind of
like pass down a message from the future
to my past self about this. And this
goes for entrepreneurs specifically,
which is you do not understand how much
work it is. Like you think you
understand how much work it is. And I've
had multiple times in my life where I've
met someone who was way further ahead
than me and I saw them actually working
5 to 10 times more than me. And I was
like, "Wow." And there's this scene in
Invictus, which is a movie with Morgan
Freeman and Matt Damon. I love this
moment. There's an exchange. I'm
paraphrasing, but he says something to
the extent of, "I've heard that you've
been uh playing with an injury." And
Matt Damon just kind of says, "Well, no
one ever plays at 100%." And I just love
that because to me that kind of
encompasses the champion mindset, which
is that it's not about playing when
circumstances are perfect. It's that
playing creates perfect circumstances.
We have to learn to play when the chips
are stacked against us. It's like having
values. Values are only valuable when
they are tested. You can say you're
loyal, but if you know a girl, if you're
in a hotel room and a girl is there and
your wife isn't there and there's no way
that she finds out, that is the test of
whether you're loyal. It's when there's
stakes. Test of whether you have work
ethic is whether you can work when
you're tired. It's whether you can work
when you're distracted. It's whether you
can work on things that you don't find
pleasant. Because all of the and I see
this with, you know, some of the young
guys, like there was a guy we hired and
then in three days he said, "I don't
think this is for me." And he got hired
to a sales role and he was he was making
outbound calls. I was like, "You don't
think this is for you?" I was like, you
don't even know what's for you. You were
here for 3 days. You didn't even get the
ability to get good at the basic thing.
And so, there's a level of intolerance
for discomfort in some sort of
expectation that it's going to be this
amazing thing that you're going to love
at all times. And it's just not. And so,
I would I'm okay being a different voice
in the in the entrepreneur space that's
not like, you know, passion is what is
what gets you through the the hard
times. I don't think so. Passion has not
been the thing that has gotten me
through my my harder times. It has been
desire. It has been wanting to make
something into a reality by dragging
something from your mind into the world.
And sometimes I feel like you're giving
birth to this thing, which for every
mother, which I obviously haven't given
birth, it's like you give birth kicking
and screaming. It's a painful
experience, but then there's life that
happens afterwards. And I see work as
very much labor. And we even use the
same word. It's labor. It's work. It's
It's painful. The pain is that like
you're halfway through, I would imagine,
and you're like, I still have to keep
pushing because it's still not alive
yet. It's still not out. And so, I think
learning to push through that, and this
is the part that my friend was saying
where he's like, they don't get it. They
don't get it. They think that I do one
of these speaking events and they see my
Instagram and they think, "Oh, okay.
Well, why is my brain not growing like
that?" He's like, "Well, I was in five
different cities this week and I just
had to do FaceTime with my kids in order
for them to see me." And people are then
like, "I wouldn't make that trade."
Fine, but don't want what he has. And
so, let me let me draw this out for you
in a nice little visual to show you how
I see work, right? This volume that you
need to do. So, you have excitement,
right? So when you have this new idea,
which we have them, and you're like, "Oh
my god, this is amazing, right? This is
so good." The thing is is that once you
become neutral and then you become
worried and stressed, this is when work
begins. And so in the bodybuilding
world, they'd be like, "Okay, once you
have achieved failure, that is where
your working reps begin." It's an old
school bodybuilding thing. I'm sure the
science bros will be upset about it, but
I think that it very much qualifies for
how it relates to work in this world is
is that your motivation fades very
quickly. It's that work begins once
motivation stops. And I think if you
measure it that way, then you will
measure how much you work and how hard
you work very differently. So, it
reminds me this Muhammad Ali quote where
he says, "I hated every minute of
training, but I would tell myself,
suffer now and live the rest of your
life as a champion." I have this uh
tweet that I said a minute ago that I
really like. And so whenever I get to a
low point where I think why do I even
bother? I just try and remind myself
this is where most people stop and this
is why they don't win. That period that
wall that you hit like that is that is
the champion wall. That is where you you
leave everyone else behind because
everyone only works until their point of
excitement and then they stop. It's like
you have to find that next gear. So the
next point is that they cannot copy
your proof. People want to gain
reputations. They want to be known for
certain things. They want to get status.
But people can copy your promises. They
can copy your services. They can copy
your logo. They can copy your name, but
they can't copy what you've done. I have
sometimes younger entrepreneurs who
reach out and they're like, hey, I want
to build a big brand. And um they're
like, I want to start making content.
But I advise them to only make content
if they're truly documenting and don't
transition into teacher mode. Because
the thing that will build your brand is
the stuff you do. Like we look at the
business titans that are out there,
right? You look at Elon, you look at
Bezos, you look at maybe now Sam Alman,
you look at Jensen Hang from Nvidia and
they now have these quote big business
brands. Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Warren
Buffett, they are considered probably
the leaders of the business world in
terms of thought leadership. But did
they get there by building personal
brands? Or did they get there by
building personal businesses and then by
building personal businesses, which I'm
joking here. They just built big ass
businesses. By extension, people wanted
to know who was the person behind this
big business. And then they built their
credibility before they built their
likability. Everyone wants to put the
car before the horse. Everyone wants to
put the uh they want to eat the pudding
before they have the proof. The proof
comes before the pudding in the real
world. In a world where anyone can say
anything and get instant reach, trust is
the thing that is the scarcity. That is
the that is the rare commodity. And so
the idea is if you want to build a
really big brand, then you want to index
super hard on trust. And the way that
people can trust you is that you do what
you said you have done. The reason Mr.
Beast videos worked is because he used
his videos as proof. He didn't say, "I
am super knowledgeable." He said, "Look,
I did something that no one else is
willing to do." His first video that
went viral was him counting to a million
or something crazy, right? And so he did
something that other people were not
willing to do. And so he just happened
to have documented that thing. And so if
you're like, well, how do I get proof?
I'm so young. It's like, well, you just
do epic stuff. And then people will be
like, wow, he did epic stuff. This is
interesting. And so it still requires
epic amounts of work in order to do
that. The reason that there's such a
misconception about overnight success is
that it's just that there's a threshold
over which you are good enough that you
go viral. All right? And so this is call
it like here is the viral you know viral
moment. All right. So this is our viral
moment right here. The thing is is that
we the person lived this whole life.
What we in the public see is this moment
what happened since. And so we have the
perception of overnight success. And
this is why it's so difficult for people
to wrap their heads around because they
want to model what they see not what
occurred. And so we have to model what
they did not what happened. And so this
fundamentally is the inputs. This is
what they put in for a long period of
time. What we see here is the output.
This is what's visible. And so this is
where it gets especially difficult for
people trying to learn is that most
people get rich and then they get weird.
And then what happens is people then try
and copy what they do here,
not what they did to get there. And so
they copy the wrong stuff. They model
the plateau, not the rise. So you don't
get rich by flying on private jets. You
get rich then you can fly on private
jets. And so a big thing that richer
people do is that they will act with
urgency. And I would say this is just
not even richer people. This is
entrepreneurs specifically that I'm
making this video for is that they act
with urgency. All right? And so you can
tell in some ways how how successful
someone's going to be by how quickly
they do things. The gap between thoughts
and action. And so this is something I
personally work on a lot which is like
how quickly between when I make a
decision to do something does it
actually occur. And you can improve your
potency as a person, how powerful you
are by decreasing the gap between
thoughts and action. Like if you think
about the hypothetical extreme of this,
the god figure if you will, thoughts and
reality are one and the same. He thinks
planets and universes and they appear.
And so that would be the ultimate
demonstration of power in my opinion.
And so we can approximate that. We can
get as close to that as we can by
shrinking the time it takes between when
we think and when we decide and then
when we ultimately do. When you don't
have any more information to collect in
order to make a decision, then you make
the decision. And you make the decision
by eliminating alternatives. So like
literally the word decide comes from
decadere which is Latin for to cut off.
And so the question is what thing are
you eliminating by making the decision
that you're going to make. And a really
easy tactical thing is is whenever you
say I'm going to get this done by the
end of the week ask yourself can I get
it done by the end of the day? And that
seems like a very small hack but that
increases your pace of progress by 7x.
And so if you hear that you're like wow
7x it's like yeah and for that reason
there are people who are working 100
times faster than you. And I think that
this is a really good cultural thing
which is uh you can just say end of day
not
end of week and not end of month end of
week. So in each of the instances this
is a 4x increase this is a 7x increase
right and you can even go end of day
goes into end of hour. Now this is one
that I talks about a lot and she's a
master operator is that she heard this
from a mentor. She said, "If it's a five
minute task and you have 5 minutes, do
it now." And so the amount of times
where I'm like, "Hey, we should do this
thing." And then literally in 60 seconds
it's handled by Ila, like while I'm just
walking around talking just like
shooting ideas out there is baffling.
And so her speed of like that's a great
idea, it's already been, you know,
delegated out. Like she doesn't keep
things on her plate. And so there's this
big falseness that I think is propagated
by a lot of the social media world
because it feels good and to get lots of
shares because it gives people
permission to be lazy. It gives people
permission to tell themselves that
they're great just the way they are. I
wholeheartedly reject that entire
notion. The idea that they sell you is
that you're young. You've got time. And
I think that is false because all this
does is extend how long it takes you to
remember that number one, tomorrow isn't
guaranteed. Like I just looked at my
newsfeed this morning and I there was a
guy that I knew who's my age and he just
died of stomach cancer. Really sad.
Really nice guy. Wife and three kids
into fitness, really in shape. Just a
freak thing that happened. And so the
assumption that you've got time assumes
that you know you're going to live
forever, that you know you're going to
live to 100. And we know that that's not
true. And let me put this in
perspective. Three out of 10,000 people
live to 100. And so everyone has this
assumption in their mind that they're
like, "Yeah, I'm at 50, so I'm going to
make it to 100." Yeah. Well, you've got
a 3 in 10,000 shot at doing that. Very
unlikely. More realistically, you'll die
at the median, which is 74 for men in
the US, which means that at 37, you're
actually at the halfway point, just in
years. But if you adjust for the
increase in speed of time. So the same
reason that your kid at 5 years old
thinks that something takes forever when
you say it's going to happen next year
and when you're 40 something that
happens next year feels like you blink
your eyes and it's there is that when
you're five one year is 20% of your
life. When you're 40 one year is 2 and a
half% of your life. And so it very much
in real way is nine times faster than it
is for your 5-year-old. And so it's my
belief that as we get older we don't
become more patient. Time just moves
faster. And so if you adjust for that
time speed, your midpoint isn't 37. It's
closer to 21. And so this is also why in
my opinion when you think back on your
life, you have so much meat in the first
20 years. So much stuff happens, all
these material life events. And it's
because in that time period, it was half
of your life. And then after that,
everything happens real fast. And so
what you have to realize is one,
tomorrow isn't guaranteed. Two, nothing
is going to be easy. Just get over it.
Every time you think, oh, this could
look just get immediately skip to it.
Oh, that's not true. there's something I
don't know about that. Just skip to it.
The faster you can train that muscle
that as soon as you have this FOMO, just
slow down and realize that you don't
know enough. Three, it takes time to get
good. There's no one who's good at
anything that was immediately good at
it. And the people who are immediately
good at it, I remember telling a
professor, I was like, you know, I've
just naturally been good at languages.
He was like, when you were a kid, did
you have multiple languages in your
household? I was like, well, yeah, I'm
bilingual. And he's like, what are you
even talking about? Like, you literally
started with that. So, of course,
languages are easier for you. And so the
thing is is that the people who have
things that come naturally to them, they
just only came because they forgot the
work that generalized to the new skill.
Once you realize that it takes time and
repetitions to get good, then you also
realize that the sooner you start, the
sooner you get. And don't stop until you
do. So let's assume you act with
urgency, right? You've gotten that done.
You've moved end of week to end of day.
You've moved end of day to end of this
hour. You moved end of month to end of
this week. And you've massively
increased the speed that you execute.
Well, then you start running face
forward into the fact that things are
going to get really hard really fast.
And so I will I will tell you this one
is that hard is for now, not forever.
And so the good thing about bad times is
that they end. And the bad thing about
good times is that they also end. And so
whenever you're going through a good
season, it's also a good reminder that
this too shall pass. And so what ends up
happening is that when you're in the
hard time, that can give you that
necessary respite. It can give you the
end of the the tunnel that you can look
forward to. There's only three outcomes.
You either quit, it gets easier, or you
get harder. So, think about that because
no matter what, it always ends, but you
only lose when you quit before you see
it through. Because two out of the three
outcomes get easier. Either it relents,
the outside circumstance gets easier,
like the hard thing moves, or you become
harder and then by extension, it no
longer feels hard for you, which I'll
make this real for you right now. Think
about the problems that you were
stressed about 5 years ago in your
business, right? Think about the things
that you were dealing with, what you
were stressed about. Now, think about
you trying to solve those problems
today. It's probably a joke to you now.
You'd be like, "Well, yeah, obviously."
It's not that those things became less
hard, you became better. But here's
where this gets really interesting for
me. It just means that nothing is
inherently hard to begin with anyways.
We are just always inadequate. For me, I
remember when I had five employees and I
was like, "Man, it's so many people to
manage." Or, you know, I was like,
"Where am I going to, you know, I have
to manage cash flow. How do I do that?"
Or like, "How am I going to get new
customers? like how do I how do I I
can't sell really expensive stuff. Like
what if someone gets upset, you know, if
I if I charge more, right? What if what
if someone finds out I charged this
much? As though it's like something
wrong. Like all of these things are just
just irrelevant to me now. Just so
silly. Though for me at the time, they
were difficult. And I can only imagine
how inconsequential the problems that I
deal with growing hopefully three
billion dollar companies right now
within the portfolio compared to what
Elon deals with having six multiple
hundred billion dollar companies and I I
compare myself to that so I can always
feel like I have a long way to go. If
you are a business owner and you're
making you know you've got a legitimate
business, you've got employees, revenue,
profit, etc. and you'd like to see how
we grow companies. Uh, every month at
acquisition.com in person at my
headquarters, we hold basically two-day
workshops where my team, my actual, you
know, director of marketing, director of
sales, director of media, all of all of
my team basically works with businesses
to just help them grow. And it's a cool
way for us to meet new companies that
kind of builds our pipeline on the
investment side, but it also just
provides value to you guys. And so, it's
kind of a cool win-win. You know, the
reviews are exceptional. So the link is
ACQ ACQ the letters.com
vegas. You can go there and you grab a
time with my team. They'll just ask you
a couple questions, make sure the
business makes sense that we can help
you out. And if so, then we'll invite
you out here to Vegas and have a have a
party. Not really. It'll just be almost
all entirely business. And I would
encourage you not to party at least till
afterwards. Uh but beyond that, let's
get back to it. But let me give you one
thing that that'll also give you a
little bit of hope about these these
hard times is that these hard times are
also
your best times
but only in reverse. And so let me
explain what I mean by that. Think about
the times when you were younger and you
were in love and you were poor and
you're like man those were the good old
days. The thing is is that when you were
in that moment it was stressful. You
didn't know how you're going to make
ends meet, how you're going to make
rent, where you're going to get food,
whatever it is. You have these these
hard times, the hard times that you go
through today, but these hard times
become the good old days. And so, we
only see the truth when we look back.
You have to go through them to get the
perspective. And it's something that I
try and like remember on a regular basis
that like I'm going through the good old
days. And if they're the good old days
in the future, they might as well be the
good old days today. So, let me tell you
a little bit about what it feels like
throughout this entire process. Because
if you were consistently growing, you
were consistently in pain. That's why
they're called growing pains, not
growing joys. And if you have stress
from growth, remember the alternative is
that you can have stress from stagnation
and you can have stress from decline,
which fundamentally means that hardness
and stress is a fact of life. You will
always have stress, you will always have
problems. And the largest problem of
all, the largest stressor of all is
determining that having problems is a
problem. Is that being stressed means
there's something wrong with you. But
being stressed just means you're alive.
Having problems just means that you are
actually doing something. I'll tell you
this story that I think can drive this
home. And I think this is the path to
fulfillment over comfort.
So imagine you talk to the creator of
the universe before birth and pick the
person you get to become. You say, "I
want to be the most courageous." The
creator replies and says, "Well then I
will give you monsters to terrify you so
that you can conquer them." Then you
say, "Well, I want to be patient." And
the creator replies, "Well, then I will
make you work harder and longer so you
can learn to wait." So then you say, "I
want to be wise." Then the creator
replies, "Then I will give you failures
that will crush your spirit so you can
learn the value of judgment." You then
say, "Sounds like a rough life. Can you
give me a good life?" Creator replies,
"Just like we measure the quality of a
blacksmith by the strength of his steel.
I measure you by what you are at the
end, not the fire and the hammer it took
to make you." A good life isn't a life
that's easy. A good life is a life that
makes you into a good person. And that,
my son, is a hard life. And so I
remember when I when I sold Gym Launch,
there was a year that I more or less
took off. I had all these kind of
existential crises that I was going
through because all I had been doing is
just working and working, working. Then
I hadn't like put my head up to like
look around and and smell the roses, per
se. The problem that I had was that when
I was smelling the roses, I was
miserable. I was very sad. And the the
sadness for me came from the thing that
I had that was most reinforcing my life
was the work that I was doing. That was
the thing that was that I enjoyed the
most. And so not having that actually
created a huge loss for me. And so then
I had to create like what am I doing
like why am I here right and so for me
that was when I created the hypothesis
or at least the thesis I have for my
life was that hard work is the goal is
that nothing left in the tank which I
got from Jesse gets which I love
emptying the tank every day is the point
because for me those are the days that
when I look back are the days that I
feel the most fulfilled on in the moment
you feel tired you feel exhausted you
feel like you're bored you feel like you
don't want to do another repetition you
don't want to do another two hours but
another two hours another repetition
another edit is what is required not
what you want but is what is required
tired and if you have a little bit left
in the tank and you don't know if you
have a little bit left in the tank until
you empty it, until you physically can.
And so I think about that steel that
we're trying to make and the only
difference is that we are both the steel
and the blacksmith. And so the creator
in this would just give you the fire and
either you can stand far enough away
from it that it just keeps you warm or
you can go into it and you can hammer
out the impurities so that you can just
become better and better and better and
stronger. And if you're watching this
and you would like to start a business,
but you're not sure where to start. I am
a co-owner of school and we just started
the school games. And right now we're
giving $100,000 away in cash or a cyber
truck to the person who builds the
biggest community on school in 30 days.
And so school's just a community
platform that helps people start
businesses. And right now, one out of
two people who start a community, a paid
community on school make their first
dollar online. And so you're like,
"Okay, well that's cool." And right now,
on average, the average paid community
owner makes $1,360 per month. So, this
is not going to be the thing that makes
you, you know, a billionaire rich, but
it can help you get started, which is
why I invest in the company. I spent
four years looking for something that
could make the easiest kind of starter
business for people to get going,
especially starting online. The reason
that we have this success rate, right,
the reason that we have this very high
success rate is that I meet every single
week and onboard new people. So, every
Monday I'm on a call and I onboard uh,
you know, right now I think it's about
300 people per call that are on there.
Uh, and so I answer questions live uh
with everyone on there and it's a lot of
times it's the same faces. So while the
the calls are relatively small, I'd
encourage you to come on. On top of
that, I have kind of like step-by-step
instructions of exactly what you need to
do that the best community owners have
done. And so you can just model the
behaviors. Just do this stuff. I don't
explain psychology and triggers and NLP.
It's just like do this stuff and this is
what yields this outcome, right? And
then finally, we'll give you the entire
platform that basically makes all the
tech really easy. And so right now we've
got people who aren't in foreign
countries who don't speak English. Uh
we've got I mean I think there was a guy
who won the games 15 years old. So like
I'm telling you it's not rocket science.
Like we've really taken a lot of effort
to make it as simple as humanly
possible. You don't need any other
software to make this work. And so if
that sounds at all interesting, the best
part about all of this is that you can
start absolutely free. And so we have
the course, we have the calls, we have
the platform, and we also have the
community of other people. All right?
And so you can start for free, get 14
days. uh you can click the link which is
uh right here. Oops, other way around.
school.com/games
start for free and hopefully I'll see
you on the other side. And so a big part
of why this is so hard is that so few
people want to go into the fire, right?
And the fire could be entrepreneurship.
The fire could be content creation. The
fire could be starting a new product.
The fire could be doing outreach and
knocking on doors or quitting your job
and and and starting another job in a
completely different industry. That's
the fire. It's the thing that other
people aren't willing to do and they
tell you not to do it because it helps
them justify the risk that they chose
not to take. It helps them feel better
about the risks they aren't willing to
make. I remember thinking about this at
long length when I was younger and I
thought about the word exceptional.
Right? So buried in the word itself is
the key point which is that you cannot
expect to be accepted. If you want to be
exceptional, to become exceptional, by
definition, you have to become the
exception, which means you have to be
unlike other people. You have to do what
they don't agree with. If they agreed
with you, if everyone agrees with you,
you can be sure that it's the wrong
path. When I quit my job, every single
person in my life told me it was a bad
idea. I graduated in three years from
Vanderbilt. I had a nice white collar
consulting job. I was set up to go to
grad school to one of the Ivy Leagues. I
had acedc. Like, I was set up. I'd done
the path. And so for me to quit and be
like, I'm going to I'm going to be a
personal trainer for minimum wage at a
gym, that was not a happy news for the
vast majority of people that I knew. But
the thing is is that I've had those
conversations multiple times in my life.
When I ended up leaving the gyms and
started the turnaround business, every
person was like, you finally made this
thing work. You finally, you know, now
we finally agree with you again. And it
was right at the point where they
accepted me that I was like, you know
what? I think I want to do this other
thing and I'm going to sell all these
gyms for basically nothing in 90 days to
then start new. And they're like, "But
you spent so long on this." And they see
sunk cost fallacy. And the thing is is
don't listen to the people who are
closest to you. Listen to the people who
are closest to your goals. And so a lot
of people like to think about how they
have these mentors and these heroes. But
the most important group is your
reference group. And your reference
group is who you compare yourself to.
But the thing is that people think they
compare themselves to their mentors and
their heroes. But they don't. Who you
compare yourself to is who influences
your decisions. So the voices you hear,
the voices you listen to when you're
about to make a big move, those voices
are your actual reference group. And if
those voices are not close to your goal,
you should not listen to them. If
anything, sometimes the best advice in
the world is do the opposite of whatever
it is that they did to get in their
life. If you don't want what they have,
don't listen to what they say. Even when
you're an entrepreneur, so let's fast
forward a couple years. So there was a
point where I started uh the outbound
team. So, this is going to sound super
tactical, but I'm going to zoom out for
you. So, we at Gym Launch had we were
all paid ads for the most part. We I
made content, I had a book, like there
were things that were out there, but
still 70% plus of my of my new customers
came from paid ads. And I knew that if I
wanted to sell the company, I would have
to create a second acquisition channel
that was very different from the primary
one so that I could create more
stability so you don't have one itis,
one point of failure within the
business. And so I remember reading this
book about how to set up outbound and it
said it will take a year and I said I'm
really good at marketing, really good at
sales. It'll take me 12 weeks and it
took 12 months like the book said. And
so when I walked through that, what was
interesting is it took 90 days for us to
get our first sale. And the whole time
I'm investing in this team, I'm
investing in software, I'm investing in
training and consulting to like learn
how to get all this stuff going just to
get our first sale. But that's not very
good for the amount of time and effort
we put into it. And then 3 months, you
know, after that, we started getting a
couple sales trickling in. Still not a
lot. And I actually had almost like an
intervention from my my executive team
that were like, "Hey, we think this is
shiny object." They were using my words
against me. They're like, "We think this
is a distraction. It's it's not, you
know, yielding a result for us. I don't
I think we should, you know, cut our
losses and and move on." And I just I
kept thinking to myself like, "This is
what hard feels like." like we have to
just keep inching our way through it
because we have made sales which means
we could just we just need to get more
efficient at it. And then we did another
six months and then we got to the point
where it became 50% of revenue. But
here's the thing that you you don't see.
And so whether you're starting a new
acquisition channel like I was, you're
starting paid ads, whatever, is that if
I tell you in one year I could double
your business, right? Let's say you have
to pay me $100,000, right? And in one
year I will double your business. Many
people would probably be like, "Yeah,
sign me up. I'll do it. Maybe I'll take
a loan." But even for the 100, like if I
know I'm going to double my business in
a year, I would do it. Okay. But then
what happens is month one, they drop 5K
and then they lose 5K. And then month
two, they lose 5K again. And then they
say, "Ah, ads aren't for me. H
Outbound's not for me." But the thing is
is that the way it actually feels is
that you lose 5K, you lose another 5K,
you lose another 5K, and then all of a
sudden one month you make 25K, and then
the next month you make 50K, and you
make all of this back and some, but it
happens all at once. And so there's a
saying on Wall Street that I like, which
is it happens slower than you expect and
then faster than you can imagine. And
they talk about that when it comes to
market drops and market explosions. It's
like we should like this, we should be
crashing. It hasn't adjusted yet. It
happens slower than you expect and then
faster than you can imagine. And so you
have to be willing to forego that period
of time for a long time understanding
that you just want to make progress. And
so I think the thing that separates
masters from beginners is that masters
have more ways to win. So you can
measure your expertise in anything by
the ways you can measure equaling the
number of times and ways you can win.
And so if you're an expert at making
videos, then throughout the entire
process of a really long project, you
have many wins on the way. You know all
the little progress markers that occur
to create some big outcome and you
approximate those little progress
markers for the ultimate goal at the
end. When you're a beginner, you only
see the output and all you see is I'm
doing stuff and nothing is happening.
But you just aren't able to mark
progress well. And so if you want to
increase your expertise, then you need
to increase the number of ways you can
measure so that you can increase the
number of wins you have in a given time
period. And by the way, that is what
makes you enjoy your work. And this is
how the work itself becomes reinforcing.
And so in order to develop that
expertise, you have to have education.
And people think that education is
expensive. But the only thing more
expensive than education is not being
educated. And so I would say that in my
life I spent more money than I could
possibly imagine is simply trying to
acquire skills and relationships that
would make me better. To give you an
idea, I think the most expensive thing
that I bought for this, this is not
including uh me messing stuff up and
just losing tons of money, but I
actually wrote a check for was $350,000
to have a dinner with a guy who was
worth 7 billion. And I got exactly what
I wanted from that dinner and it was
incredibly valuable for me. And uh he
kept saying no. I I offered 100k and
then 200k and 250k and then 350k and
when we offered 350k he said fine I'll
just have dinner with you and he didn't
ask for the money but I think he was
just seeing that I was willing to spend
the $350,000 for it and so I have spent
so much money for 1 hour 2 hours
anything to gain context because I I
heard this close and you've heard if
you've watched my channel you've heard
this before but pick whatever number
your income goal is right let's say it's
a million dollars a year and let's say
you're currently making $100 $100,000 a
year. If
you value that million- dollar goal, the
value of the million dollars per year,
what's the price you put on that
education? The value of that education
is the difference between where you're
at and where you want to go. And so
that's why if I want to if I want to
become a Deca billionaire, then I should
be willing to pay everything that I have
in order to gain the skills, the
experience, the knowledge in order to
get there. And so if there's a way that
you can spend $50,000 in order to learn
a million per year skill set, then every
year you don't do it, you lose $950,000
that you would have made if you had made
that investment. And so the the key
point here is that we use poor people
language when we talk about education
when we should be using investor
language because it should be an
investment in an asset and the asset
just happens to be you and you can't
sell it, but you can invest in it and
you can grow it. If you think about
investments, you'll never say an
investment is expensive. There's just a
cost and a return. But if someone says
there's a $100 stock or $1,000 stock, it
could be expensive relative to the
return. But if the return is supposed to
be good, then no one says that that
amount of money itself is expensive.
It's just what the cost is for the
return. It is the investment. And so if
you think about education in that same
way, it always has to be framed in terms
of what you get for it, not how much it
costs. It's not about how much you make
now. It's how much you're going to make
and how much that's worth to you. And
for me, whatever my delta is is what I'm
willing to pour into that without
hesitation. And so for the first
probably I mean shoot, I lost everything
at year whatever six of my
entrepreneurial journey. And I put all
of the extra money that I had right back
into learning more stuff. And so even
though I made profit, my like biggest
expense was me. But it wasn't on my
living and my lifestyle. It was on my
education and my network and my
surroundings and the skills I wanted to
learn. The courses, the workshops, the
seminars, the coaching programs, all the
things that I did. I'm a product of that
world despite the fact that I think that
world overall has a lot of shitty
people. I still learned a lot. And you
can learn just as much by learning what
not to do and say I will never do that
or treat someone the way that person
treated me because the best students
never come out negative. So really like
think that like I have always been the
top performer in every single program,
coaching, whatever I have ever done. And
so the process that I use is number one,
do everything they tell you to to the
tea the first time. Then take what works
and toss the rest. You can learn
something from everyone, but only take
in that which makes you stronger, which
is a quote that I have from Harry
Potter, the Sword of Gryffindor. But I
love it because it was enchanted to have
this this spell that it would only take
in things that made it stronger. So it
took in the bass venom which allowed it
to kill you know the horcruxes later on.
But I like to see myself as that sword
is that I continue to invest. I continue
to put things into the steel but I only
take in that which makes me stronger. So
a lot of people have these negative
experiences with coaches, consultants,
vendors, whatever. And I just like to
think to myself like in what way will
this make me better? And so by instead
asking that question rather than
enumerating the many things they could
have done better or the things they did
wrong simply saying there is something
that I can learn from this and there is
something in this experience that will
make me stronger. And that frame may
have been one of the most valuable
frames that I've had because I like you
have spent plenty of money on things
that have quote not worked but I still
learned enough from them and oftentimes
what not to do that allowed me to then
see what to do. But before I ever did
that, I had to do the first three steps
of that, which was do everything they
said to the tea the first time. And if
for whatever reason it did not work, I
would then use my other skills to patch
the difference so that I could find a
way to make it work. And by the way, if
they have a success story, which they
usually do cuz that's how they sold you,
is that you find that person and figure
out what they are doing that is lacking
in the education that the person who's
teaching taught. Fundamentally, if you
ever buy something where there is
somebody who has been successful, then
it means there are activities that yield
success. And the discrepancy, I'm going
to show this to you visually because I
think it's important. So, let's say
there's a bridge, right? And you've got,
you know, here's here's money and here's
you. Okay? So, you've got this path that
someone uh shows you how to do. So, you
paid money and they give you these
little bricks here, right? They give you
these little bricks that you paid money
for. And maybe these bricks, you had to
pay different vendors, different amounts
of money for each one of these bricks,
but you still haven't made money yet.
The thing is is that there's a gap here.
And the reason that some people are
successful with some people's uh, you
know, programs or implementations and
other people aren't is because that the
people who already bought that brick
from somebody else before that, that
brick isn't missing. And so if you see
the education you have as these bricks
on the road, then you wouldn't say that
the foundation of a house is in some way
a ripoff. you would just say it's not a
complete house. Now, if they sold you
the expectation that you would have a
house, sure, you could be upset by them,
but they still helped you build a
foundation. And so, it's the same people
who get upset saying, "Oh, I learned
arithmetic from Mrs. Glass, but then
when I found Mr. Hardwick and he taught
me calculus, she only taught me
arithmetic. She is a moron." You
wouldn't say that, but for some reason,
people talk about the basics of business
the same way when they become more
advanced. If someone taught you how to
do outbound and do warm outreach so that
you could sell your first customers and
someone else later teaches you how to
run ads, well, you probably learned how
to work the leads from the ads that work
for you because you learned how to do
outbound. You probably learned how to
sell because you learned how to sell
strangers. And so when you did the ads,
it worked for you. And then somebody
else who did that same exact
implementation, didn't have the bricks
that you had and they never got the
dollars that came across. And so
whenever something doesn't work, if you
can, it doesn't make you any better by
saying it's their fault. And fault also
only matters in the eyes of the law,
which you're not going to sue anybody
anyways. So, who gives a [ __ ] The only
thing that matters is whether the
outcome happens or not, which is under
your control because it means that you
simply have a discrepancy in where you
are and where you want to go. And so, a
lot of people would then say, "Sure,
Alex, it's easy for you to say you're a
white guy. You're right. Cool. So, just
don't watch the video and move on." Um,
but for everybody else, you've got
connections,
you've got money, you've got looks,
you've got intellect or intelligence.
These are all great, but you can beat
all of these. You can beat somebody who
has all four if you have one thing,
which is the desire to improve, the
insatiable desire to improve. No matter
where you start, if you have this, it's
hard to beat someone who improves every
second of every day without stopping,
without giving up. And so I have met
people who have connections, money,
looks, and intelligence. And they do not
people who have an insatiable desire to
improve, who do not stop. And so if you
think about it like this, if life were a
race where at the end you die, so got to
finish first, right? There are people
who may start at different parts of that
race, but what is not measured is the
speed that you can move. And so, I don't
know if you've seen these these clips
that have gone viral in the NFL where
they have like one of their wide
receivers start like 20 yards behind a
fan and they have to race the length of
the football field and then the wide
receiver will usually catch up like talk
to them and then just speed right past
them. And so, it's far less about where
you start because that's where a lot of
losers will define themselves. They'll
define themselves by what happened to
them rather than what they made happen.
and somebody else may be here, but it
only matters if you think that there's
fairness. But I don't believe fairness
is something that exists in the
universe. And so I don't hold it as an
ideal that I proclaim must exist. But
there is simply a starting point in a
rate of progress. And the starting point
you can't control, but the rate of
progress you can. And so control what
you can control. If education is a
change in behavior, that's what you do.
If you become educated, you do something
different after you learn something.
Then intelligence is rate of learning
which means that you can in a very real
way influence it's the rate of learning
the speed of learning. You can influence
how quickly you move along this race
independent of where you start. And
you'll also note that the person here
has no influence on what this person
does. These two people are independent
nodes. The only reason that this person
gets upset is that they think it's not
fair. And if you just eliminate fairness
from your vocabulary and think only in
terms of what do I need to do, then it
eliminates a lot of the distraction that
keeps you poor. So if you call recall
from the very beginning, lazy people get
distracted. They focus on distraction.
And one of the biggest distractions is
it's not fair. It's it's not fair. I
shouldn't have to. I should get. I
should. I should. It should. Things
shouldn't. It's all shoulds. And I will
tell you that should in my worldview
should not exist because should creates
expectations of an uncaring universe. It
says that you demand something and I
promise you that the universe will win.
And so all you have to do is watch like
baby seals just get immediately eaten by
orcas after like a mother is laying
there on the ice to be like, "Wow, life
isn't fair." I'm sure that seal could be
like, "It's not fair that my babies were
literally eaten in front of me." Tough,
right? Tough. They have mammal brains.
We can see that they got they got some
feelings, right? And so if we go back to
the sword of Gryffindor, does demanding
that it should be fair make you
stronger? Does saying that that person
started further ahead of you in any way
benefit you? No. Because your actions
are entirely independent from them. And
so the only thing that that does is
actually delay your speed of taking
action. It makes you dumber. Because if
we define intelligence by rate of
learning, then it means it takes you
longer to learn. It makes you stupid.
And I think that that's why people stay
here for a very long time.
And many of them never leave. So one of
the things
that bad entrepreneurs talk about with
good entrepreneurs is one of the excuses
they'll make is that they will make
preference excuses. They will make
trade-off excuses. They will say this is
not worth the price. In which case,
fine, but don't also want the thing. So
for example, privacy is the price of
fame. Loneliness is the price of
ambition. Pleasure is the price of
discipline. Novelty is the price of
loyalty. Discretion is the price of
trust. And so so many people want the
benefits of these traits, but can't
afford the cost or the price. They're
not willing to be discreet, but they
want someone to trust them. They can't
hold someone's secrets. They they want
somebody to be be loyal to them at home,
but then they want the thrill of the new
relationship. They want the benefits of
discipline, of consistency, but they
can't trade the pleasure in the moment.
They want ambition, but they're not
willing to pay the price of being
lonely, of being the exception. They
want fame, but then all of a sudden they
are startled when they realize that they
have no privacy. And so each of these
things are tradeoffs. And if you're not
willing to make the trade, fine, but
don't [ __ ] about it. And and I think
part of it is that we have a hard time
understanding to what degree. And so
each of these ideals are not binary.
It's not discretion. It's how much
discretion you have. It's not novelty,
it's how much novelty. It's not
pleasure, it's how much pleasure. It's
not loneliness, it's how lonely. And
it's not hard work. It's how hard do you
have to work and how long do you have to
work? And so most people, and I think
this is where a lot of the complaints
come, is that they believe they're doing
10 out of 10 work, right? They're like,
I'm do this is 10 out of 10 hard for me
right now, but they're actually only
doing onetenth
of the amount of work that it takes to
get to this goal. And so they might be
doing a 10 out of 10 work for a 100K
goal, but they're doing a 1 out of 10
work for a $1 million goal. And I think
a lot of that work comes down to being
able to accurately assess reality and
see what your actual discrepancies are
and realize how much work you really
have to do in order to get good at every
one of those discrepancies because most
outcomes don't occur until you've met
all of the conditions like a pipeline.
All right? So let's say you've got this
pipeline here and you've got these
valves. These are the valves. You've got
this water that's coming here and let's
say once you get all the way through the
water comes out the other side. These
valves have to open. You have to open
this thing. Open each of these valves.
And let's say you've checked off three
of the four boxes. The water's still
going to be stuck here. You're still not
going to get the water through. And so
the thing is is that as much as you work
and you're like, "But I did that and I
did that and that didn't work and that
didn't work. It may have worked. It just
might not have met every condition to
get the outcome." And so if you think
about life and outcomes that way, it
gets a lot easier because it stops being
emotional. You can simply say there's a
condition that I haven't met and I have
to figure out what that condition is
rather than proclaiming that the
universe isn't fair or that you you
started further back and that's why your
effort hasn't resulted in it. Maybe and
maybe this person only has to meet three
of these and you have to meet four.
Okay. Well, then I guess that means that
you're going to be better than them. Why
is that a bad thing? It means that
you're going to develop more skills to
achieve the same goal. Great. If the end
of this life is that you are the steel,
you are the thing that gets created,
then you can't resent the hammer and the
fire that makes you. Because you can't
wish for strong character and an easy
life because the price of each is the
other. So either people aren't
succeeding because they don't understand
that they have to make a trade that
they're not willing to make or the trade
that they're currently making isn't
sufficient. So they either think that
they deserve to get the Nike shoes just
for being who they are and think it's
not fair and think that the store owner
should just give them the Nike shoes.
And look, all you have to do is look at
the news. There's plenty of people who
think that way and they go and try and
take it, right? But that makes them a
thief. That makes them significantly
worse. It actually does more harm to
them in my opinion. But there are people
who believe that. That's the worst.
That's the lowest level. The next level
above that is people who say, "No, I'm
willing to pay for the Nikes, but I'll
pay 30." It's like, "Yeah, but they're
they're 300. That's the price." It's
like, "Yeah, but I'll pay 30." They
don't extend they understand the extent
of the trade-off and then they complain
that their $30 isn't good enough. It
shouldn't be so expensive. It is what it
is. And so there's a saying that Leila
and I say a lot internally. I'm like it
takes what it takes. And so if we want
this thing, what often has to happen is
you have to keep bidding. It's much more
like an auction of a trade-off because
the real world level three is that you
see the Nikes and then you bid 30 and
then you realize it's not enough. And
rather than moan or put your thing down
and walk away, you're like 50. And
they're like, you're like 100.
You're like, God. And so that is the
pain is being able to consistently reset
the expectations and bid again and again
and again until eventually you make it
all the way through and you bid $300.
You do get your Nikes and then all of a
sudden everyone says
must be nice to be born so naturally
good. All you have to do by the way is
watch some of my very first content
pieces. And you think my very first
content pieces are the podcasts that I
made. various for content pieces that I
made I made for my gyms 13 years ago.
And so it's like, man, you're so
naturally good on camera. Watch those
videos. Tell me if you think the same
way. I had to take shots before the
videos cuz I was so nervous about
sounding stupid. In the fourth version,
I would say like the highest version of
this. So let let's I'll I'll break this
down. So the zero level of trade-offs is
should you just say you should get it
for nothing. The next level is too much.
So you say it's 30 bucks, but it's
actually 300. And you say it should. The
next level is bidding. So you bid. So
you say 30, 50, 100, and you find out
that you're insufficient. You keep going
up. The final is source, which is where
you determine the price. And this is
often, in my opinion, where you create
your reality. So, it's continuing to
hammer away at content, continuing to
write drafts of the book before anyone
else has seen it because you are the one
that holds a standard higher than
everyone else's because no longer do you
accept the approval of others as your
litmus test. The market for sure in the
beginning will tell you whether you're
good or not. But Steve Jobs, Henry Ford,
right, they would have asked for faster
horses, not cars, is that they demand
more from themselves than anyone else
does. And by setting that standard here
where everyone else is here, by actually
meeting the standards of the market, you
actually lower your own. And so this is
where your standards become source. And
this is where you get into rarified air.
And this is what the quote rich guys, if
you will, when we talk behind closed
doors about what people don't
understand. It's about holding the
standard. And in my opinion, the person
who should make the decision in every
organization is the person who has the
highest standard. It's not the person
who's most senior, not the person who
has the most shares. It's the person who
has the highest standards for whatever
it is. Our marketing should be at this
level. If the owner thinks it's less,
then that person should be the person
who's running marketing. If somebody
else thinks the product needs to be this
good and someone else thinks it be less,
that person should be in charge, whether
it's their first day or the thousandth
day. The person who has the highest
standards is the one who should be
making the decision. They should become
source. And so when you get to that
level, the only person you're making
trade-offs with is yourself. You're the
one who's determining
is this good enough for me to put my
name on rather than is this good enough
for them to say it's good. And for
example, J.R.R. Tolkien worked on The
Hobbit for a decade and he didn't even
submit the draft. One of his friends saw
that he had been working on it for a
decade and submitted it, grabbed it from
his desk and submitted it for him to a
publisher and then it obviously became
The Hobbit and and everything came after
that. And so his standards were so high
that he still didn't even think it was
ready, but it was still so good that
they ended up releasing it. Now, many of
you think that you are J.R. Tolken. But
most of you were not. It's actually just
very bad. And so once you realize how
high your standards really have to be in
order to be excellent, what you then
have this daunting realization is that
you can only do two to four things
in your whole life because of how long
it really takes to get to there. And so
it's like I want to be the best author
in the world. That's not a desire of
mine to be clear. But if I wanted to be
the best author in the world that I know
that that's going to take at least a
decade of actually working hard every
single day to get better. And believing
that for me because I'm special, I
should somehow be able to be my first
book is an overnight success. And and
and and that is the thing that chains
you to mediocrity. It's believing that
it should be a different way rather than
accepting reality as it is and then
changing your actions as a consequence.
And so this is also why lazy people
distract themselves
because distraction
makes you believe the lie that you can
try a hundred things and then figure out
which one works when the reality any of
them can work but none of them will work
unless you pick one to work on and then
that is you making it work. The vast
majority of things with enough iteration
can become success. It's just that
people underestimate how many iterations
they need to have. It's 19 drafts, not
two. It's 500 minutes of editing to make
the video, not 50. It's making a,000
phone calls every week for two years,
not two months. And so, most of the
times, it's just that our level of
understanding, it's it's here. And this
is where a lot of people get stuck. A
lot of people get stuck here. They say,
"I should be better. This should be
easier. I've already paid a little bit.
I said I was willing to pay 30. The Nike
store owner won't give me the shoes. And
then you basically are the same as this
person. You just have a price at that. I
should I should. It should be. I
deserve. I am worth.
Takes what it takes. It costs what it
costs. You got to be willing to make the
trade. No matter what your goal is, you
will suffer to achieve it. So, pick a
goal big enough. It's worth suffering
for. Here's how to achieve that goal.
Give me the next 30 minutes and I'll
help you make the most of your 20s and
your 30s. So, I made my first million
when I was 26. A decade later, my
portfolio companies generated last year
over $250 million in aggregate revenue.
And I'm 36 now. And so in this video,
I'm going to give you the real world
advice that I wish someone had told me
much earlier. So number one is you want
to take asymmetric bets. If you're under
30, you have no reason not to go 100%
allin on your goals. The downside is
nothing and the upside is everything. If
you think about life as giving you kind
of lottery tickets, right? You can
scratch off a ticket and if you don't
win, then what did you lose? The
scratchoff ticket. But the thing is is
that when you have nothing to lose, you
have nothing to lose and you only have
things to gain. And so the objective
when you have as little as you can is to
take as many shots as possible because
your downside is zero, right? And so
it's the only time in your career where
you can take more shots than anyone
else. And so the reason or the fact that
people don't take shots and myself
included when I was younger, I was so
afraid to take a shot. But the only
reason that was holding me back was the
belief that other people who I don't
even talk to anymore would somehow judge
me as a quote failure. You never
actually start from scratch ever again
because every time after the first time
you start from scratch, you start with
an experience. So you still always net a
positive. And so that's the beautiful
thing about taking shots is that you
either get the big win or more likely
you learn something and then that
learning compounds. And so the thing is
is that I had a misunderstanding of how
success worked which is that it's far
more stacking many things on top of each
other than it is nothing nothing and
then something works. Right? And so if
you imagine success like a bridge,
right? So you're over here and you've
got this chasm that you have to get
across. Right? This is, you know, let's
say there's alligators here and lava and
all sorts of stuff, right? And then
there's you over here who's got, you
know, your big smiley face and you're
happy and you're doing all the stuff you
want. The thing is is that I thought
that I just kept wanting to jump over
this gap over and over again and think
like if I just jumped hard enough or if
I had the right opportunity, that's what
would do it. But more likely than not,
it's really like you install these these
bricks on the path and you keep you keep
walking and it's like, okay, well, I
fall here. Okay, well, I'll fix this one
later. And then you take a and then you
you start again and then you fall here
and then you fix this and you keep going
and then you fall here and then you fix
this and then all of a sudden you make
it all the way across. And that's what
it looks like or what the experience of
kind of becoming the overnight success
is and that's why so many people talk
about it where uh it doesn't happen at
all and then happens all at once. It's
not that it happens all at once. The
actual outcome of getting a system to
work all the way through that is binary.
But the process of building the system
is actually very linear. I'm also not
saying this from a position of um like
even though I I you know I saw some
success early in my career, I also
started pretty early. And so I had nine
failed businesses, nine before I had one
that really worked. And so I bring this
up to say that like I don't know what
failure you're on right now. Maybe
you're on zero failures, you're on one
failure or two failures, but you have
way more failures in you at the end of
the day. Like one of the big
realizations I had is that since life is
an infinite game and what that means is
that there are there are games where you
have a defined time period and at the
end you count the score, right? And then
there's infinite games where the only
point of the game is to keep playing the
game. And so like the point of marriage
is not to get married, it's to stay
married. The point of health is not to
get healthy, it's to stay healthy. And
the point of business is not to get into
business, but to stay in business. And
so basically the only thing that you
have to do to stay in business is to
choose to continue to fight. And so once
you realize that, then you realize that
you become a success the moment you
decide you are. Because being successful
is far more about being in the game,
about being in the arena. And so when
you're in your 20s, what you lack in
experience, you have to make up for in
effort and hours. And believing
otherwise leads to a life of honestly
well-deserved mediocrity. So if you're
hearing this, you're like, "Okay, I got
it. I need to take more bets and I need
to take maybe riskier bets because my
downside is nothing. All right. Well,
which bets do I take? So number two,
don't follow your passion. So passion is
vague and so it's very difficult to say
I like this thing more than this thing.
But what you can say is I'm better at
this than that. And so passion usually
then comes from competence, not creates
competence. And so we usually like
things that we get good at rather than
getting good at things that we like,
right? And so this is the thing like
that I think confuses a lot of people.
And so the other flip side of this is
that enjoying something doesn't even
guarantee that you're good at it or that
you're going to be able to make money
from it. And I remember my dad used to
tell me when I was much younger, he
said, "Listen, if I were following my
passion, I'd be a bartender at a ski
slope, right?" He said, "If you can just
make money," he said, "The rest of your
life, you can do whatever you want." And
I actually think it was very practical
advice for me. And I'm very grateful
that I got that. But the thing is is
that getting good at anything, you have
to slog through this period where you're
probably not going to be passionate
about it because it's very boring. It's
very monotonous. It's very repetitive.
Right? It's it's one thing to say, "Oh,
I like ping pong." It's another thing to
say like I hit 500 forehands and 500
backhands every morning and every night,
right? It's a different level of
dedication that you have to have to it.
And that isn't going to be something
you're passionate about. You might like
playing the game, but getting good at
the game are two very different things,
right? And so it sets this false
expectation that I think ultimately
harms more people. And I think one of
the biggest reasons of not following
your passion is that your passions will
change as you age. I promise you, the
things that I was passionate about when
I was 20 is not things I'm passion about
now. And I'm sure that things I'm
passionate about when I'm in my mid and
late 40s are going to be different than
things I'm now. Same as 50s and 60s. And
so this idea that like I have to find
this one thing, it puts a ton of
pressure on that thing that it has to be
perfect forever. And if it's not going
to be perfect forever, then why don't we
be practical now so that we can give
ourselves options later. So
fundamentally, all we're going to look
for are things that you're good at that
people already spend money on because
that creates a very high likelihood
outcome of you creating something that
you can exchange in the marketplace.
Once you've decided on something that
you want to get better at, you're
already good at it. You want to get
better at it, which is hopefully, you
know, maybe it is your passion, which be
amazing, but a lot of times it's not.
The next thing is you have to get good
at one thing.
Think about the equal opposite of this.
How would I get someone to be poor? I
would get them to keep starting new
things rather than getting good at one
thing. And so, do you remember that guy
who got rich dropshipping, day trading,
buying crypto, and wholesaling all at
the same time? Yeah. Me neither. You
have to focus. And it's arrogant to
think that you can do multiple things at
once and beat someone who does one thing
with all their effort. You have to pick
one thing and go allin and then you
become the one who's hard to beat. So I
told you earlier that I had nine failed
businesses. Now here's the part that a
lot of people don't know. Six of those I
had at the same time. And so I like to
tell people, oh yeah, I'm a CEO. I've
got multiple companies, right? Like kind
of the way I do now. But it's very
different now because the thing is is
that I actually have CEOs who run those
businesses, right? Not me. Because you
can only be CEO of one thing. You can
only drive one thing. Now
IDriveacquisquisition.com,
right? But CEOs of each of the divisions
of each of the portfolio companies, like
those are people who run their own
profit and loss statements. And I didn't
understand that. And so I had a
chiropractor agency, a dental agency, a
gym launch business where we did
turnarounds. I And then I also had five
gyms of my own at the time. All right?
Depending on how you want to describe
it, I had five locations plus the three.
So I had eight. It's a lot. All right?
It was too much. And because of that, I
was stressed out of my mind. I was so
spread thin and basically I had lots of
things that generated revenue and I
didn't make any money. The only thing
that it fed was my ego, not my bank
account. When did this big turnaround
happen for me? Leila came into my life
and she was like, "Hey, you're clearly
really good at this one thing. Why don't
we just cut everything else?" And that's
exactly what I did. It was the hardest
period of my life cuz I had to shut down
all the other businesses but one, which
also meant that I had to end
partnerships with all these different
other people that were relying on me.
And that was hard. I'm not going to lie.
Like it was not fun. Like these are
people that I liked. But I had to make
this decision. I had to cut off the life
that I didn't want to have the life I
wanted. If you want to impress people
who are poor, talk about how many things
you do. If you want to impress people
who are rich, talk about how good you
are at one thing. Like, at the end of
the day, your ability to demonstrate
excellence is going to be the only thing
that someone who is ahead of you will
look at. And so, you only fool the
people who have no idea. And I'll be
real, there's a lot of people who have
no idea. So the thing is is that this is
where the whole imposttor syndrome will
start creeping up on you because you're
like man I you know I kind of feel like
a little bit of imposter because you are
you're misrepresenting yourself. You
know you're not as successful as you
pretend to be. And so if you want to
eliminate imposter syndrome just stop
lying. When I say lying people like I
don't lie. If you present something in a
way that you know is going to be
perceived differently than what reality
is posturing in my opinion lying. You're
misrepresenting. What you want to be
able to do is state the facts and tell
the truth. Period. And then if those
facts and truth are not compelling and
do not get you status, then change the
facts and change the truth. Meaning not
that you lie about them, but you work so
hard that the truth is compelling. And
sometimes that takes time. But I promise
you, the people who are who are all in
only on the imposter stuff, the guys
that I knew that are that were, you
know, when I was in my 20s who were kind
of like hustle bros, whatever, a lot of
those guys faded, you know, and or
they're still like jumping from thing to
thing to thing, kind of like pretending
to be successful, but like I know that
they're barely able to afford their
house. At the end of the day, it's a
choice that you have to make. Do I want
to pretend to be rich? Do I want to
pretend to be successful? Do I want to
look like I'm successful? Or do I want
to be successful, which more likely is
do the things that success requires,
which today do not look like success. It
looks like a very long string of
failures. Because you will be rewarded
far more in life for your determination
than your intelligence. But the problem
with determination is is that in the
short term, it looks like a long string
of failures until it works. Okay? So,
you're like, "Got it. I'm going to
focus." Now, let me give you something
that's going to help you stay focused.
Number four, stop networking. All right?
Now, this is a really, really important
point. Now, it's not that I even have
some big problem with networking
overall. That's actually not my point.
It's more that there are there are
seasons of life, right? In the
beginning, you're in exploration. I
grabbed this from Nval and I really love
it. Later on, you get into exploitation,
which is where you go allin, right? And
so, the thing is is that in the
beginning, you're tasting lots of stuff.
you're trying to figure out what you are
good at or have some proclivity towards.
When you have that proclivity, then it
becomes very clear now is the time to
cut everything else so that we can focus
and go deep. Right? So, you go broad in
the beginning so that you can figure out
what you to go deep on. The broad period
that you're in is never the period where
you're going to make money. Like this is
the part you have to get. I say from the
beginning of when I started until I
really graduated from it was about 5
years. It's less of a binary, more of a
continuum. In the beginning, you taste
lots of stuff and then you just have to
because in the beginning, you have to
say yes to things. You have to say yes
because you're so bad. You're so scared.
You never want to say yes. But you learn
to say yes a little bit and then you say
yes more and then you say yes more. And
then very quickly you learn to say yes
and get overwhelmed. And so the only way
out of this yes trap is you have to
start practicing to say no. And if
you're like, wait a second, that means
that I have to change what I do. Welcome
to entrepreneurship. Like you have to
learn, you have to evolve, you have to
grow. So let me give you a very tactical
example. So, if you're debating between
going to a networking event, right, or
like a lunch with some dude who's like,
"Hey, we should collaborate. We should
synergize. We should maybe trade ideas.
Let me pick your brain, whatever, right?
And if you're picking between any of
those things and working, choose the
work because when the work works out,
the people will still be there to take
your call. But if you never do the work,
no amount of networking will get the
work done for you." And the bonus or
negative bonus here is that if you don't
get the work done, they're not going to
take your call in the future. And so
they're willing to take the call today
with whatever small amount of success
that you have. But if you lose that
success because you get distracted,
they're not going to take the call in
the future. That door will be open. I
promise. And not only will that door be
open, 100 other doors will open for you
if you win. During this season, losers
congregate. Winners isolate. If everyone
was supposed to win, they would have
made podiums bigger. The top of the
mountain isn't supposed to fit a lot of
people. It's normal. The air is harder
to breathe. And the thing is is if all
of this seems antithetical or different
than what you've heard or what other
people around you are experiencing, ask
yourself, is that do those people have
the lives you want? A great way to make
a mistake is to ask someone else's idea
about your idea who has no idea. When
you make this transition from going from
the exploration period to the
exploitation phase, you go from many
looser connections to a very few tight
ones. I tend to be very transactional as
a person, but I think we all are and
some people are just open about it.
Everybody on some level does some sort
of math in their head of like the
person, this person in my life, I get
more benefits than I have costs. But the
thing is is that if you want to raise
the standard of your life, you have to
raise the standard of the people who you
surround yourself with. Because the
fastest way to change your life is to
change who you're friends with. Because
that reference group is ultimately going
to be what you compare yourself to. And
so if you change who you compare
yourself to, all of a sudden you will
create deprivation around the difference
between where they're at and where
you're at. The only way that people let
you into circles that you don't deserve
to be in is work ethic. There is no
other way. It is the universal currency
of respect across cultures, across time
periods, across cohorts, across
generations. An old man will respect a
young man who hustles and they will
always be willing to give time to
somebody who they think will execute.
Like this is that was my secret and it
still is my secret. Like I I network
with people who are above who you know I
punch above my weight class in terms of
the people that I'm connected with
because they know that I'll do the work
and so they don't feel like they're
wasting their time by helping cuz the
thing is a lot of people are actually
very happy to help you. What they aren't
happy to do is waste their time helping
you when you actually don't help
yourself. And so I've shed friends at
every season of my life and my close
circle has always been very small like
very small. The thing is is that I think
of my life in kind of seasons, right?
And so you're going to have friends for
this season and maybe you keep them for
life but maybe you don't. And I think
giving yourself permission to say like
that was that season and they were
amazing friends for the objectives that
I had then and then my objectives change
and it's not really fair to them to say
hey I'm completely changing all the
things that I'm doing. You have to still
be friends with me. It might not make
sense for them. And so not keeping this
expectation over them has helped me kind
of like free myself of that so that I
can reinvest the time that I have in
friends that I think will help me get to
where I'm trying to go next. Okay. So,
if we're taking these big bets and we're
we're following something that we're
good at rather than that we're
passionate about and we're not going to
get distracted, we're doubling down on
one thing and we're turning off these
other things that in the beginning we
were exploring the the little lunches,
the little networking because we know
that if we just succeed at this one
thing, all of those doors will be open.
What do we do to make money? So, let me
give you a money rule. Money loves
speed. And this will relate back to the
asymmetric bets. By the time you have
all the information, the opportunity is
gone. Sometimes you just have to make
your bet. And it's almost always faster
to make a decision, then make a mistake,
and then correct that mistake than it is
to painstakingly deliberate on the
decision. If you know how long it would
take you to fix something, if you're
wrong, then just make your best bet cuz
you can always fix it later. And so said
differently, if it takes you 5 minutes
to decide and then 10 minutes to fix
something, don't take two hours to
decide because you could just do it. And
if you're right, you immediately are
moving forward 5 minutes later. And if
you're wrong, you're moving forward 15
minutes later. But either way, it's
going to take you less time than trying
to assume that you're going to know
everything because you're just not. You
have to get a grip with uncertainty.
Like uncertainty is the job. Like, if
you want certainty, don't try and go
after your dreams. Because the thing is
is that the only way to go after a
certain dream is to go after an old
dream. And if you go after an old dream
that's already happened, you're trying
to fulfill something that will not
happen again. And so, you're either
going to do the work or you're going to
sit around wishing you'd done the work.
And one of the things that took me a
very long time to to understand was that
the things that dragged me down were not
the things that I thought they were.
Because the heaviest things in life
aren't iron or gold, but they are unmade
decisions. They're the things that weigh
us down. They take up all of our
attention, all of our brain power. And
so, right now, there's probably a
handful of decisions that you know you
need to make that you're just not. If
you want to feel yourself go so much
faster than you ever have, just decide.
So few decisions in life actually are
irreversible. Even the ones that people
pretend are irreversible. What if I
should I buy this car? Should I buy this
car? You could buy it and then flip it.
It's not like you can't sell it again,
right? And so the real cost of the
decision is the delta between what I
could buy it for and what I can sell it
for. Okay. Well, how much does it cost
me waiting 6 months to do this? Probably
a lot. And if I need that car to to, you
know, or a truck so that I can like go
to job sites or pick up clients or
whatever it is, then like I am losing
all of the time that I'm waiting to
decide. And I'm telling you where people
slow down is at the decision process
more than at the doing process. Doing
usually takes very little time. It's the
deciding that people that bogs people
down in quagmire, right? They just get
stuck. They they feel like they're
trudging through mud because they just
hit these walls and all of a sudden
there's no action because they're just
thinking, they're planning. And I think
I had to get comfortable with the idea
that there's so many variables that I do
not know. That I actually have to get
comfortable with the idea that I just
should test and learn and I'll learn way
faster than if I try and deliberate. And
that has happened more times in my life
than not. I would say that approach has
served me with bigger and bigger
decisions in life. Like I have I've made
monster mistakes, but the bigger mistake
that I would have made is just not being
able to make decisions to begin with.
And so you can move through life at
seven times the rate of other people by
simply changing when you say you're
going to make a decision from the end of
the week to the end of the day. And if
you want to move even faster than that,
you can decide at the end of the hour.
And if you move faster than that, guess
what you could do? Decide now. And so
sometimes like my team has seen me do
this. Well, we're like, "Okay, so um you
know, we've got to we got to make this
decision." And people are always like,
"Yeah, let's kick that to next, you
know, meeting or let's let's circle
back. Let's let's go offline for that."
It's like, "No, let's confront. Let's
just choose. Let's pick. Which vendor
are we going with? Which website design
do we like? What headline are we going
to use? What's the ad hook that we're
going to go with? Just pick. That's why
all of this stuff comes down to bets. If
you want to have a future that you want,
you have to get comfortable with risk.
So, if money loves speed, where are some
of the money potholes? So, number six,
pay off your debt. Now, I'm going to hit
you with something you probably haven't
thought of before, which is there are
many kinds of debt. There's obviously
financial debt, but the biggest and most
expensive debt is ignorance debt. It's
the cost of what you do not know but
should. And to be clear, I still pay off
ignorance debt every day. It's the debt
in skills and knowledge that I should
know to get faster and further to where
I'm trying to go, but I don't. And so, I
have to just fail until I get this
knowledge. But the thing is is that if I
don't fail, I will never get it. I am
willing to pay in looking bad, in money
lost, in time lost, in people judging me
to make bets. And so I like this
perspective on experts, which is that an
expert is just somebody who's made all
the mistakes you can make in a very
narrow field. You have to learn how to
lose before you can learn how to win.
And the first rule of losing is that you
didn't lose, you just learned. You paid
down the most expensive debt. So then
the question is, if you know that you
have to pay this debt off, why aren't
you? And I think it's because you don't
realize how expensive not paying it off
really is. And so know the price of
inaction. Do you think that the reason
that you're in the situation you're in
right now is because you've struggled to
decide in the past that you've gotten
all the way up to the edge, you've
gotten all the way up to the precipice,
all the way to the front of the line,
and then you choose not to. And so the
question is, how many times have you run
that cycle? How many times have you
thought through this decision and then
not done something about it? And is the
life you have you want as a result of
those actions? Because maybe the best
thing you can possibly do is maybe see
this and then just choose to make that
call because not making that call has
gotten you where you're at. If you
genuinely believe that you're going to
do this sooner or later, right? Make
this bet, make this call, whatever,
sooner or later, then you might as well
do it sooner so you can start enjoying
the benefits now cuz you're going to
enjoy the benefits either way. But why
would you want to delay the benefits of
taking action? The real real is because
you want to delay the costs of potential
failure. Real quick, I have the most
amazing offer for you, which is all
three of my books for free. Uh, just
cover the shipping. I think it's like
five or six bucks in shipping uh per
book. um you get the actual hardback
shipped to you. And the reason for that
is because some of you guys may know we
had 3.6 million copies that were donated
from entrepreneurs. And I'm doing my
part to give the books away, but I'm
also giving the other two books uh to
anyone who want them who choose to
redeem it. All right. Last time I made
this offer, uh it sold out in like 10
days. Uh so I did buy a lot more books.
Um so if you see this, you know, go
check it out. Go grab them. Um these are
obviously while supplies last. um
because this lives in the video forever
and if you get there and it's not there
then you know don't get upset. All
right, back to the video. Let's say you
have a reason why you haven't taken
action, whatever that is, right? Just
imagine in your mind like it's some
visual thing. Realistically, it's
probably one or two voices in your head
and you can probably think about whose
voice that is and it might not be yours.
And so, who is the person that you're
choosing to not live your entire life
for? Whose judgment do you care that
much about? And so I will tell you the
story. I almost didn't sell Gym Launch
because I thought that $46 million was
not enough to impress a specific
colleague of mine. Real talk. I was very
very hesitant to sell the company. And
the main reason is cuz I thought that
they would think that that wasn't that
that impressive. And when I thought
about that, I was like, "Wow." I was
like, and this is this wasn't family.
This wasn't friends. This was just kind
of a colleague that I respected. when I
was able to really listen to the voice,
whose voice does this belong to and what
are they saying? And most importantly,
is that the person who I want to give
control over my entire life? And once I
saw that, I was like, well, that's
ridiculous. I don't care about this.
They're usually subconscious. Like, you
don't notice them unless you listen for
the voice, unless you name the voice. Am
I really going to let John be the reason
that I don't get married to this girl?
Is Joe really going to be the reason
that I don't raise my prices? Is Sarah
really the reason why I'm not going to
sell this thing? Ridiculous. But people
do it, myself included, every day. And
look, this isn't going to be easy,
right? Building these skills, losing
friends, taking bets, taking losses, you
might find yourself stuck and then
blaming your previous experiences. Which
is why number eight, get over yourself.
Everyone's childhood was difficult. Get
over it. And if you want to win the
award for hardest childhood,
congratulations. I'll give it to you.
You have the hardest childhood. You win.
Feel better, right? No one cares about
what happened to you then. only what you
can make happen now. And so the only
person that's satisfied with whatever
that reason is is you. And the everyone
else calls that reason an excuse. And at
the end of the day age, you want to get
to your life and have everyone be like,
you know what, he wasn't successful, but
he had a lot of really good reasons.
Wouldn't it be so much more powerful to
say he had all these reasons he
shouldn't have been successful but was
anyways? Like those reasons actually
give you even more fuel because you
become a stronger story to everyone
else. Like no one cares when the silver
spoon kid succeeds really. And so all of
the reasons that you can normally tell
yourself of why you shouldn't do it are
sometimes the best reasons of why you
should. If you had disadvantages, I
agree with you. Like you're right. It's
harder to be successful if this thing
happened to you or if you're born with X
or you're in this gender or this race or
you have this birth deformity or you
speak a different language or you're
born in a different country or you had
abuse, whatever. So the main point is
despite the disadvantage, you only have
one choice. What are you going to do?
You can take action anyway and become
proof to other people like you, your
people who were also born into your
situation, whether it was abuse, whether
it was your gender, whether it was your
your race, whe your country, and you can
prove to them or prove to yourself that
you can overcome it and that they can
overcome it too. Or you can do what the
vast majority of people do, is that they
protect their ego and blame and
complain. And to be clear, this is not a
pulpit. You can do whatever you want. I
support your choice. Go you. But only
one of those decisions is going to make
you better. And likely only one of those
decisions is going to get you closer to
where you want to go. Because at the end
of the day, here's the TLDDR. Losers
define themselves by what has happened
to them. Winners define themselves by
what they can make happen despite what's
happened to them. And so where some
person sees an excuse, another person
sees an origin story. Like you look at
every every champion, every hero, every
comic book, they all have hard pasts.
And so you having a hard past, whatever
that is for you or some disadvantage,
just makes you like every other
superhero who ends up, you know,
changing their lives. And I actually
love this. I heard this from Joe Rogan,
so this is not mine. Every single one of
us can today wake up like it's the first
day of a video game. Like you just like
got transported into this body and
you're like, "Okay, look around. I have
a wife. I have some kids. I have a job I
hate or I have a business I don't like
or I have some bet that I I have this
thing inside of me that I I know I can
do more but I'm not. you have all this
stuff that's around you and now you can
choose like everything else behind you.
You could just have today be your spawn
point. And so when you're in a video
game, it's easy to just forsake all that
stuff because you don't have this
emotional connection to it. But the
thing is is that like the action needs
to be taken either way. So whatever
frame of mind you need to be in in order
to do it, then do that. All right. So
once we have this head trash out of the
way, then we have to get back to back to
business, if you will. So what's the
next thing that we have to do? We have
to solve bigger problems.
If you want to make more money in your
20s and 30s, solve bigger problems.
Right? If you want to make a million
dollars, you have to be willing to
endure a million dollars worth of pain.
If you want to make $10 million, you
have to endure $10 million worth of
pain. And here's the thing is that most
people have never endured that. And so
when they start getting into it, the
thing is is that the nature of the pain
changes. And so in the beginning, the
pain is I don't know what I'm doing.
Later the pain is people judging me. And
later the pain is lawsuits. And a lot of
the pain is just not knowing what the
hell you're doing at whatever stage of
business you're at because that never
goes away. And so not knowing is a
constant. So trying to solve for not
knowing is silly cuz it's never going to
happen. And so this is why you have to
get comfortable with uncertainty. You
have to make uncertainty your friend. If
we're going to solve problems, right, we
might as well pick big ones. And I'll
give you a great a great analogy that I
got from Steven Schwarzman who's the
founder of Blackstone. He said big goals
and small goals are usually just about
as hard. A common VC saying is that
having a really successful restaurant,
you might have to work 80 hours a week
and manage all these different people to
have a really successful local
restaurant. And you might also have to
manage all these people and do all this
other stuff if you want to build a
billion-dollar unicorn. Both of those
things are hard. And so if it's going to
be hard regardless, you might as well go
big. And actually, it's been a very like
that is a very helpful frame for me
because one of the beliefs that I have
about business and life is that
suffering is a constant. Like I have to
remind myself this on a regular basis,
which is that if we are growing, I am in
pain. If we're plateaued, I am in pain.
And if we are declining, I'm in pain.
Which means that I am pretty much always
in pain. And so to think that there's
something wrong with pain misses the
point of how this works. It is a
constant. And if it's a constant, we
don't even need to think about it. It
shouldn't be a reason to do something or
not do something cuz it's just always
there. Competition for big goals,
believe it or not, is actually much
rarer. It's thinner air. People believe
that it's so unrealistic that they don't
shoot for it, which actually makes fewer
people there to compete against. And so,
it is probably harder in some ways to
have a local restaurant that is really
successful than it is to have a, you
know, big business. And what I found is
that most problems are solvable, which
means that most things are knowable. And
the reason that you probably haven't
gotten to where you want to go is cuz
you haven't actually started trying it.
And so, you're going to have to be
obsessive about it. And I think one of
the big things that I didn't understand
was just how obsessive I was going to
have to be. Is normal to not be like
your other normal friends. If you want
to have extraordinary outcomes, if you
think about the reverse, it wouldn't
make sense if we do the same things as
our normal friends and somehow get
something different. It's a positive
indicator. It's a green flag that you're
living a different life than everyone
around you. Like I had a conversation
with my EAS this morning. They were
like, "Man, I feel like if you were a
normal person," that's what they said to
me. They're like, "I feel like if you
were a normal person, you would drive
this kind of car." I like looked at them
and I was like, "So basically, if I were
not me, I would do things that not me
would do. Right now, it would make sense
that you're going to do things that
normal people won't do because you're
trying to not have the same outcome as
them." 10. Obsession is the ticket of
entry. It's the price of entry. And the
thing is is that obsession isn't really
obsession. It's actually just trying and
no one else tries. Like that's the real
real is that normal people call what I
consider sane people to be obsessed. But
sane people, which is what I consider
myself, consider everyone else insane
because they do nothing and waste their
lives. And so we have to be comfortable
with reasoning from first principles of
like, I am only going to live here for
not that long and I'm only going to have
a certain amount of hours to do the
stuff that I want to do. Why on earth
would I not do it because of some face
noise that some person, some other, you
know, advanced ape is going to say to me
about them having a preference about how
I'm living my life. And so you can boil
almost all insults or judgments down to
this statement. And I think like I hear
this, I translate it when I hear hate.
You do not live your life in a way that
I would prefer. So they're like, you
know, you shouldn't. I do not live my
life in a way that you would prefer. And
that's okay because that's why you live
a life that you prefer and not a life
that I would prefer. And that's why you
live your life and I live my life. And
so people just get so triggered by this.
So when people hate on you, it usually
means that they're jealous and believe
that you are undeserving of some part of
your life. And so to be clear, it's not
that they're jealous of your whole life.
They might be jealous of the attention
you get. They might be jealous of maybe
just the money you make, but not the way
you look. Or they might be jealous of
the the body you have, right? And
they're going to be like, "Ah, you're
chewing to that food, right?" Or, you
know, "You work too much." or whatever
the whatever the little snide remark is,
right? But what they basically think is
that life has unjustly given you the
benefits that they believe they
rightfully deserve. And they might be
right, but life isn't fair. Here's the
thing. People who obsess about work life
balance are typically mediocre at both.
And so obsessed people apply their
obsession to everything and just call it
life. And they also don't consider
themselves obsessed. They just consider
everyone else unobsessed and just plain
and banal. And so I get criticized all
the time for work life balance. People
say like, Alex, you don't have any
hobbies, right? I don't want any. I
don't want any. They're basically saying
yet again, you live your life in a way
that I would not prefer. If I were in
your position, I would live life
differently, right? And that's why
you're not in my position. So why should
I sacrifice the things that I prefer to
do in order to do the things that I
don't want to do, right? Just to make
your definition of work life balance
happy, which I don't accept. So like
work life balance is a wonderful goal. I
have no hate for it. It's not going to
happen if you want to be the best. Like
you've probably heard the, you know,
work smart not hard, right? That only
works when you're competing against
people who are not smart. If you compete
against other smart people, the only
thing you will have left is to work
hard. If you work smart, not hard, you
will get beaten by someone who works
smart and hard. And if I don't know
about you, I would rather be that person
cuz at the end of the day, I would like
to just win. And that is point 11, which
is work hard and smart. If you
extrapolate out what a normal life is
like, right? Maybe someone makes, you
know, a million dollars or $2 million
over the span of their entire career,
right? 40 years plus. I think there is
just a certain amount of work that must
be done to generate income. And so what
I would rather do is just take that 40
years and just cram it into four and
then have the other 36 years of my life
to do whatever I want with resources far
beyond what I would be able to do there.
And so I remember Ila uh had this very
early conversation with I think it was
our first date. She said she's like I
just want to help people, right? It's
like that was her whole thing. And I was
like do you think it'd be possible for
you to help people and to make money?
And she was like well yeah. And I was
like, "Okay, do you think you could help
more people if you made more money?" And
she was like, "Yeah." And in that
conversation, she shifted from being
what I would consider a bleeding heart
of just like doing everything like just
trying to just just help every single
person. But the thing is is you're li
your resources are so limited. You can't
do much. And so if you want to help a
lot of people, it's like you got to
learn the game. And the thing is to win
that game, it's like you probably have
to outwork people, a lot of people. And
you have to be called names by people
who live lives that you don't like. I
want to be very clear about this. When I
say work hard and smart, it doesn't mean
it's going to be exciting. So 12 here is
accept boredom.
Like if you want to be creative, you
must first learn to be bored. If you
want to achieve a goal, you'll either
have to accept boredom or pain. And the
bigger the goal, the more of both you're
going to get. I have this great visual
in my head about how winning works,
right? And so you imagine you have this
this marathon, right, that you're
running. So you've got this starting
line here, right? Start. And then you've
got this big race, right? And then
you've got a finish line over here.
Tada. Finish. Now, when you've seen a
race, where do people gather? They
gather here. And they gather here. So,
here's the question. Where does the
winning happen? On your own. Cuz no one
cheers for you not drinking for a day or
not smoking, you know, on a lawn drive
if you're trying to quit or not
overeating for one night or skipping out
on going to the club with the boys. No
one cheers for that. No workout or meal
is ever impressive on its own. And so
the reason so few people understand
success or at least achieve it in my
opinion is that consistency never looks
impressive in the moment only at the
end. Because if you think about how
consist like it's very difficult to
visualize consistency because you can
only see someone do something once,
right? You see a snapshot of someone
take a shot or hit a backhand. The only
way that you can actually witness
consistency is working with people who
are consistent. Because the thing that
you have to see is that person show up
every single day. Like someone could
show a workout of me working out and
someone else might be like, "Okay, well,
I mean that's a workout. Maybe I should
kind of work out like that." And sure,
there's a level of intensity that might
be there or form and things like that,
whatever. But the thing that people
won't see is it's very hard to witness
20 years cuz you have to be there for 20
years. And this is why I think so few
people are able to internalize
consistency, which is the most important
success trait, because it's very hard to
lose if you show up every day. It's very
hard. And showing up every day is
boring. And so if we're willing to
accept boredom, the next thing that
we're going to have to be willing to
accept is sacrifice.
We have to give up some things to get
others. And so like at the end of the
day, like all we have are trade-offs. We
have what we have and what we want. And
the question is, what are the things
that you currently have? Are you willing
to trade for the things you want? And I
think this such a perfect way of
thinking about it. Like you have
everything in your life right now that
you're going to have to trade. Like
everyone trades. Everyone starts even
when you had at zero. You have things in
your life and you have to trade those
things for things that you currently
want but don't have. There's no perfect
way to live your 20s or your 30s, right?
You either live them up and become an
underskilled 30 or 40-year-old or you
work them up and become an underlived 30
or 40-year-old. You just have to figure
out which you'd rather be and accept the
trade-offs and know that there are no
doovers. And that's okay. And when we're
really thinking about sacrifice right
now, no human will ever get more than 24
hours per day. We all have that, right?
And so fundamentally everything that you
spend your time on that is not you
pursuing your goal you are determining
is more important than your goal. And so
if you look at what you did every single
one of these hours and then you actually
surface it and say you know what
watching Netflix you know doom scrolling
Tik Tok and Instagram hanging around
doing nothing surfing the web or
whatever it is that people do these days
that is what's actually more important
to you based on your behavior. And so,
is it really a sacrifice to give that up
for what you want? Because the thing is
is that a year from now, you're not
going to look back on today and be like,
"Man, I'm so glad." Like, those clips
that I watched really changed things for
me. They you probably won't even
remember any of the clips that you saw.
They did a great research study on this
where they did short form versus long
form even and people remember like 11%.
Like 24 hours later, it was a tiny
percentage. And so we have to accept
that the things that we spending our
time on most of the time is just wasting
our time on. And so I think Senica said
this, it's not that we don't have enough
time, it's that we waste the time we
have. I come back to this which is like
is it really a sacrifice or you finally
just saying I believe this is my
priority and therefore all of these
things that are not helping me pursue
that I'm now going to trade out for
things that will help me get this
priority. That's it. And to me, if you
like what you're going to get, why would
you not make the trade? And so I had
this clip that went super viral from a
podcast that I did yesterday. And the
host asked me, "If all my books and all
my tweets and all my emails and all my
YouTube videos were all deleted and I
had to compress all of my stuff uh into
into 60 seconds, what would I say for
somebody who's in their 20s and 30s?"
This is what I said. Figure out what you
want. Ignore the opinions of others and
do so much volume that it would be
unreasonable to not be successful.
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