Original subtitles

Hi, I'm Patrick Star!

And I live with my parents! Ow!

This is my dad!

This is my mom! [chuckles]

This is my sister! She's shy.

This is my grandpa!

This is my room!

And this...

[cheering]

This is my show!

[cheering]

? spooky music playing ?

Welcome one and all

to the Mystical

Patrino the Great

Seance Hour!

-Today... -[glass shatters]

...we will resurrect the soul

of my beloved microwave burrito!

-[microwave beeping] -I overcooked it this morning

and it died!

In order to speak to the great beyond,

I'll need... [grunts]

...my Wedgie board!

Eeny, meeny, miney...

Whoa!

? eerie music playing ?

[wind whooshing]

-[utensils clink] -Is that you, burrito?!

? music abruptly ends ?

Ay, what's the big idea?

Yeah, this ain't Bora Bora!

The Flim Flam Brothers?

Aw, they aren't burritos!

I knew I shoulda changed

into a fresh Wedgie board this week.

Whoa, whoa!

Sorry about the casting mix-up, folks.

Yeah, we're sorry too.

We was on our way to a possibly "poimonint" vacation!

Yeah, on account of...

[both gulp] Our house is haunted!

-[thunder crashes] -[shuddering]

Yeah! You're ghosts! You'rehaunting it!

-Not us! -Another ghost!

[both] We're being haunted!

Ghosts can be haunted?

This I gotta see!

I smell a Patrick Showspecial!

[sniffs] Maybe this is what you're smelling.

Oh, good!

I was just on my way to the incinerator.

Let's get a move on!

I'm sure we have a long trip ahead of-

And we're here!

[Squidina] How did we never notice

this spooky house next door?

I noticed it.

Patrino the Great sees all.

[clang]

Welcome to our formerly happy home.

I can't even look at it!

-[bell tolls] -[door creaks]

? light music plays ?

Uh, what's wrong?

I think it looks lovely!

Yeah! That's the problem!

Every night we trash every room in the house...

Deck the halls with cobwebs...

Ghostify all the portraits!

But in the morning...

[both] The joint's cleaned up!

-We'll show you what we mean. -[wind whooshes]

-[grunting] -[objects clatter]

There, all dingy and dirty. Just how we likes it!

[cracking]

Now see for yourself.

-[cracking] -[both gasp]

? heavenly choir sings ?

[meows]

[both] This place really is haunted!

And that's why we need your help!

First things first, we gotta see

what kind of phantom foe we're dealing with.

So let's install cameras everywhere!

You got it, sis!

[loud bang]

Um, maybe we should let

The Flim Flam Brothers set these up.

Our pleasure!

-Bada-bing! -Great!

Now let's make a real mess

to ensure we get a ton of footage.

[chuckles] Yeah! Like that! You're doing it!

Doing what now?

? jazzy music playing

[rapid splatting]

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

[screams]

Ha! We did it, gang.

This joint has never looked heebier nor jeebier!

[yawns]

In the morning, we'll see what the cameras picked up.

[yawns]

[snores]

-[wolf howls] -[insects chirping]

-? pleasant music plays -[rooster crows]

[snores]

Good morning, ghost-hunting gang!

[yawns] What's so good about-

[screaming]

The cleanliness never gets less creepy!

That ghost really went to work last night.

Let's see what we're up against!

[ghostly moaning]

[Flam] That's one speedy specter!

[moaning continues]

[Flim] And scary-sounding too!

-[moans] -[Flam] Wait a minute!

That's Patrick!

[moaning]

[Squidina gasps] What's that?!

[moaning]

Patrick!

Ooh! Are we gonna get a look at its face?

[groans]

[all] Patrick!

Huh!

That is one handsome ghost.

Uh, Patrick, that's you.

I'm the ghost?!

I can walk through walls!

[crash]

Okay.

Maybe I'm not the ghost.

Alright. Time for Plan B.

[whirring]

The Ghost Catcher 5000!

[all] Oh!

Make a mess, Patrick!

Patrick?

[Patrick screams]

What's that now?

? suspenseful music playing

[cackles]

Huh?

[whirring]

[grunting]

[discordant chord plays]

? music fades ?

Anybody got a Plan C?

Well, we know one thing ghosts can't resist...

[both] Ghost party!

[upbeat disco music plays in house]

[both] Ghost party?!

Time for you twos to join in!

[Squidina and Patrick scream]

[both] Awesome!

-Woo! -[Patrick laughs]

-[Flim] Yeah! -[Flam laughs]

[Squidina cheers]

Patrick! Come check out the photo booth!

Oh-ho!

[ghostly hiss]

-[grumbles] -[camera shutter clicks]

[gibbering]

[camera shutter clicks]

-[all grunting] -[Squidina screams]

[both yelp]

[Squidina] Huh?

Alright! Let's see what's under this cloak!

[audience gasps]

[all] Old man GrandPat?!

But why are you a ghost?

It's actually a very long, meandering story.

[exhales] I was-

-[doorbell dings] -Phew! Saved by the bell.

[Bunny] Yoo-hoo!

Mom? What are you doing here?

Well, it's actually a very long, meandering story. I-

Uh, can you give us the short version, Mom?

We're kind of busy here.

GrandPat's soul is just out of his body again.

He kicks the bucket in his sleep every night,

but he never gets far.

So, uh... GrandPat, why haunt thishouse?

'Cause I rented it to these two freeloaders

when they were alive!

Yeah, well above market value!

And until they pay up, I ain't leavin' 'em alone!

[overlapping arguing]

Oh, kids? Would you mind putting GrandPat back in his body?

It's starting to get a little ripe.

Have fun! Mwah!

And another thing- What? Oh, no!

I ain't goin' back in there! I got unfinished business!

-? old-timey rock song plays -? Get your ooky pooky

? Cookie pooky spooky spirit back in your body ?

? You know your ooky pooky cookie pooky spooky spirit's ?

? Acting real naughty ?

[studio audience laughs]

? Whoa, whoa, hey, hey, hey ?

? Gotta stop your runnin' away ?

? No, no way, way, way ?

? Here's some really good advice ?

? Stop being a poltergeist ?

? And get your ooky pooky cookie pooky spooky spirit ?

? Back in your body ?

? Stop messin' around ?

? We gotta bring you back around right now ?

Alright, you knuckleheads! Enough is enough.

-Break it up! Break it up! -[grunts]

We'll do this ourselves.

? ominous music plays ?

[thunder crashes]

[screams]

Just what are you two freeloaders

doing with my body?!

No! Not...

interpretive dance!

? classical music plays ?

[Flim Flam Brothers laugh]

[hoarse yelling]

-That does it! -? music ends ?

I draw the line at youngster dance moves!

[fighting grunts]

[screaming, groaning]

[energy zapping]

Patrick, I think the spectral energy

from the ghost fight

along with their connection

to the house is causing a-

That sounds like a long, meandering story.

Let's just get outta here!

[both scream]

[screaming]

[energy whooshes]

[whooshing distorts, fades]

[screaming and grunting]

? light music playing ?

Oh, shoot.

Back in this wrinkly sack o' bones again?

Ah, well. At least you two can't live here anymore!

[laughs]

We're really sorry your house got killed.

[both laugh]

What are ya sorry about, kid?

Don'tcha know what happens when ya kill a haunted house?

? eerie music plays ?

[both] Ghost house!

-[Flam] Yeah! -[Flim] Oh, yeah!

[Flim Flam Brothers cheering]

Well, they seem happy.

They sure do, Squidina. Let's go home.

[both] Get in here, youse twos!

[jazzy music playing in house]

Why not? You only die once!

[both laugh]

??

[announcer] Welcome toThe Patrick Show!

Today, Patrick Star

will defy death

in his most dangerous stunt ever.

It's actually my safest stunt ever.

We had to make some changes

after what happened in rehearsal.

Doctor's orders.

[announcer] First, he will walk across a bed of 100 flaming-

Pillows.

While simultaneously dodging

a series of razor-sharp-

Safety scissors.

Finally, he will dive head-first

into a pool of-

Life preservers.

Please do not attempt this at home.

Nothing's gonna go wrong this time.

Okay, audience. You ready?

I said, are you-

[insects chirping]

Squidina, where'd you put the audience?

[insects chirping]

Where is everybody?

[humming]

Hey, Squidina!

Don't you usually stand over there when we make the show?

I'm not doing the show with you today, Patrick.

After two seasons, we've earned some R&R.

Oh. Okay.

Man, I am so ready for a day off.

No worries, no responsibilities,

-and no fires to put out! -[siren wailing]

[Rube] Did you know that some scientists even study sand?

Isn't that just amazing?

What the-?

You never know what you might find down there!

Let's take a look-see!

Golly! Would you look at that?

This one here's the spittin' image

of my Great-Aunt Margaret.

May she rest in peace.

Hey, Rube. Whatcha doing?

Well, howdy there, Squidina!

The viewers and I are paying a visit

to the fascinating world of sand!

What viewers?

There's no camera, no mic, no crew.

-[bird screeches] -That's weird.

I don't know where they might've gone off to...

Guess they forgot about me.

Oh, well!

You know what they say: "The show must..."

-Uh... -Go on?

I would if I could remember the rest of the phrase.

[descending low note plays]

Well, it ismy day off, but...

Oh, what the heck? I'll be your crew!

Oh, gosh! Do ya mean it?

Sure! At least for today.

Now, where should we start?

How about right here?

Folks, we found Bikini Bottom's youngest

and cutest entrepreneurs.

Do you use real lemons?

'Cause your lemonade sure looks real tasty!

That's weird.

-? soft music plays -Squidina said...

[in Squidina's voice] "I'm not doing the show with you today."

[in normal voice] But there she is,

doing a show without Patrick!

And Patrick can tell

because Patrick is thisguy right here!

[sighs]

What are you doing out there, Squidina?

She's replacing you...

onto bigger, better things.

In fact, she's probably already forgotten about you.

Forgotten? About me?!

-? melodramatic music plays -[air spluttering]

[sobbing]

[alarm blaring]

What is this feeling inside my body?!

You're in emotional free-fall!

But...you canturn this around.

If you want Squidina to come back to your old show,

just commit secret acts

of devious sabotage.

Salad-tage...

Exactly!

Now, get out there and get your show back, boy!

I won't let you down, GrandPat!

[laughs mischievously]

-[slurps] Mmm! -? music fades

Soggy!

? folksy banjo music plays ?

We're out on beautiful Goo Lagoon,

where we've caughtourselves some fresh anglers.

'Scuse me, ma'am.

If y'all are fishin' for compliments,

then congratulations 'cause you're amazing!

Okay...

Say, ya mind if I give that fishin' rod a whirl?

[Patrick, muffled] Time for some salad-tage!

Now, how does this thing go again?

Back and then a whoopie-doo!

? mischievous music plays ?

[in high voice] Hey, I thought you said this thing was fast!

-Fast? I'll show you fast! -What?

[engine revs]

-You hooked a big one, sonny! -[fishing line clicking]

Bon voyage, Rube.

[horn blares]

Wow! Nice!

Amazing!

But I'm a catch-and-release kinda guy, so back you go!

-[boat whistles in midair] -Uh-oh...

Let's see what else Goo Lagoon has to offer.

A rock! The sky!

And... [gasps]

-Who do we have here? -? rock music plays ?

Say, whatcha doin' up there, mister?

V-Ball.

My man Chance is serving up match point.

Speakin' of... Would you all give me a "chance" to play?

Cool with Chance. Lance?

All good here. Nance?

I'm into it. Brance?

Let's see what the little guy can do!

Ah! [grunts]

Oopsy!

A little help if you're in there?

-You got it, mister! -[sharp slicing]

I'll give you a little help

and a big, pointy spike

right in your microphone.

Then your show's over.

Plus, I finally get to use my...

"Net-Sport Orb" Halloween costume.

? suspenseful music playing ?

It's on!

-[grunts loudly] -[whooshing]

Amazing!

[slicing]

I got it!

-[grunts] -? upbeat pop rock plays ?

[Patrick groans]

[booming]

Ooh! Match point!

? whimsical music plays

GrandPat never said salad-tongs would be so painful.

I can't do this anymore.

No! You can't give up now!

This just calls for a little shift in tactics.

If sabotage isn't your style, then try jealousy!

Jealousy?

Show Squidina that you don't need her anymore

and she'll come crawlin' back.

How?

You'll figure it out.

-[laughs] -[wind blows]

-GrandPat? -[whistle tweets]

We're hittin' the sludgy swells of Goo Lagoon

lookin' for surfers,

but the waves are empty

and I don't know why.

[both grunt]

? menacing music plays ?

Hey, how ya doin'? Fancy bumpin' into you here.

Well, actually, you bumped into me, okay?

[both] Kraken!

Say, could I interview you for my TV show?

Hey, television!

I've been trying to break into showbiz

for the past 5,000 years!

In fact, I got a funny story about that.

It all started when I-

[Rube] A story?

Oh! Do tell!

"Do tell," he says. Ooh-hoo! I'm tryin' here!

It all started when I was a teenage kraken-

Wow! A teenager! Amazing!

Hey, who's tellin' this story? Me or you?

Exciting new TV show coming through!

With my newdirector...

Old Man Walker!

Can I have my walker back now?

New director?

Hey, can a sea-monster finish a story here or what?

Sure thing, Krackers.

Right after you answer these questions for mynew show.

Oh, boy! I tell ya, I can't get a word in edgewise!

And it's makin' me irate!

[roars]

[all] Whoa!

Well, folks, here we are in the pit of a stomach

and, boy, what a stomach it is!

So that's it? You're just replacing me?

With Old Man Walker?

Yup! Just like you replaced mewith Rube.

What are you talking about?

I'm not replacing you with Rube.

You're not?

No! I'm just helping the guy out!

I felt bad for him because he lost his-

My crew!

? dramatic music stinger ?

[gasps]

Y'all don't look so good.

In fact, you look...

like you could use something to eat!

-Yeah, sounds good. -I could go for a bite.

I skipped breakfast.

Well, say no more. Lunch is on me.

Thanks for your help, Squidina.

Gosh, I thought y'all forgot about me!

Turns out you were just being digested

in the stomach of a kraken.

? whimsical music plays ?

I'm sorry I committed secret acts

of devious salad-tongs against you.

I really thought you were replacing me.

Patrick, you're my brother.

I couldn't replace you if I tried.

[onlookers] Aww!

[rumbling]

Oh, I don't feel so good.

It's like I ate something overly sweet and, uh... [smacks lips]

...saccharine!

-[stomach rumbles] -[echoing belch]

-[both] Bye, Rube! -Bye, Patrick!

Bye-bye, Squidina!

Whoa!

Hey, my walker!

Mmm!

-Ah! -[bag rustles]

I've been saving you for last, Big Mama.

Come to Papa.

Oh, we're home.

It all worked out in the end.

You know, Patrick, there's still time to do a show today.

Only if I can work

with my favorite director...

and sister!

Aww!

Don't make me sick!

??

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0