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1
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"Best before 1995."
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THEY SING CONGA SONG
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Everything smells weird
in this house!
4
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No, I'm sorry,
but we're not stopping.
5
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It's a medical emergency, Rachel!
No, no, we're already late.
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If you want to go to the shops on
the way,
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then spend less time in the toilet
before we leave.
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It's not going to the shops!
I need Imodium! Ugh...!
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I'm not well! He doesn't smell well,
to be fair. Thank you, Mum!
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No, you really don't.
Hang on, what does that mean?!
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Well, you've got that...
SHE SNIFFS
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..poorly dog smell.
THEY LAUGH
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It's not funny, Sam. I'm febrile.
You're what? I have a fever.
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I'm freezing! Hence the hot-bot.
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Oh, my God! Please, can we stop on
the high street, Rache?
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No! Oh...! Oh, I actually want to
pick up some food, as well. No!
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No, there's no time!
18
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Amy, how far is this church?
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Still can't find it.
What's it called again, Granny?
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00:00:50,600 --> 00:00:54,479
St Ivel's. It's the big one
near the Esso garage. OK.
21
00:00:54,480 --> 00:00:57,999
Saint Ivel's? What?
Saint Ivel makes cream, Mum!
22
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Oh, does he?
Well, the company does, yeah.
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Surely Saint Ivel isn't
a real saint! Ugh...
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I'll be staggered if he is.
Well, who am I thinking about, then?
25
00:01:05,080 --> 00:01:07,439
Saint Michael, maybe? OK...
No, that's Marks & Spencer!
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Which Esso garage? Saint Nigel?
Oh, my God!
27
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AS if there's a Saint Nigel!
Which Esso garage, Sue?
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The one with the pumps
and the big lorries, sometimes.
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Ridiculous.
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Ridiculous description, Mum! Oh, OK,
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I think I've found a Saint Michael's
by an Esso garage. Fantastic.
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It's just left up here, Mum.
33
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Oh, can we go via a chemist, Amy?
34
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No! The service starts
in 15 minutes!
35
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Oh, it is near. It's really near
the high street, actually. Huh?!
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No! I'll just nip in! Or do you want
me to get diarrhoea during
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the christening?! God, you'd have
to go in the font! Exactly!
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No, I wouldn't go in the font!
That's ridiculous!
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I'd just do it in my trousers!
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Not in the toilets?
Or the toilets, yeah, but even so,
41
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it would be very disruptive
at the service.
42
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Please!
43
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Doesn't she look slamming?
Uh, just extraordinary, actually.
44
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You'd never know she'd
just had a baby, would you, Paul?
45
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I know. Huh? Wow.
Oh, yeah, no, phwoar.
46
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"Phwoar"?! "Phwoar"?! Hmm? What?
47
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I mean, wow. Wow.
I meant to say wow. Yeah.
48
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I wasn't concentrating.
You look amazing. Right.
49
00:02:04,200 --> 00:02:07,639
And is this all from yoga?
No, yoga's wank. Yeah.
50
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This is all down to Katie, my PT.
Who?
51
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Unusual surname. So, Dean's new
girlfriend, Katie,
52
00:02:13,120 --> 00:02:15,399
is a personal trainer. Oh, OK. Wow!
53
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Dean's got a...?! Yeah.
54
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Wow! I know. Yeah.
55
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You should totally try her, Rache.
56
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I swear down, she has worked wonders
on my pelvic floor,
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ain't she, babe? Just a bit! She
could strangle a cat down there.
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I can.
59
00:02:29,360 --> 00:02:30,719
SUE: Wow. Well done.
60
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CHERRY: Thank you. Meow! Yeah.
No, maybe I should, you know,
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00:02:33,280 --> 00:02:35,559
I mean, I have been feeling
a bit stiff recently.
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Yeah. Yeah, you're just getting old,
love. Rude! You know,
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that happens... Oh! Oh, hell!
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Oh! What...? What happened?
65
00:02:42,640 --> 00:02:46,079
I've split the neck on my hot-bot,
trying to pull the stopper out!
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00:02:46,080 --> 00:02:48,799
Uh... SAM: Oh, no!
Dang! "Dang"?! Yeah, dang!
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I shall have to replace it now.
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I love this hot-bot! RACHEL: Please,
don't call it a hot-bot. No.
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Maybe it's a sign. A sign of what?
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To get an electric blanket.
No, no. No way, Jose. No way. Why?
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00:02:59,160 --> 00:03:03,119
Because that's what elderly people
do, like, complain in restaurants
72
00:03:03,120 --> 00:03:04,959
and like Michael Ball and...
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SAM: You love Michael Ball.
74
00:03:06,600 --> 00:03:08,959
RACHEL: Mm... We'll be picking
our cemetery plots next!
75
00:03:08,960 --> 00:03:10,959
Well, no, we'll just go in the same
one, save a bit of money. No!
76
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I don't want to think about it!
You see, this is why I'm stiff.
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Because you
and your hot-bot force me to...
78
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Oh, God! ..live... I can't get up,
actually. I'll help you.
79
00:03:19,480 --> 00:03:21,879
Oh, thank you.
..live like a pensioner.
80
00:03:21,880 --> 00:03:24,079
You OK?
I can fix your hot-bot, Paul.
81
00:03:24,080 --> 00:03:27,959
Really, Mum? Yeah. Can you? I've got
a roll of duct tape in my bag. Look.
82
00:03:27,960 --> 00:03:31,039
Why have you got duck tape, Sue?
DUCT tape!
83
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Well, in case I need to, you know...
Kidnap someone?
84
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..splinters, fix a brolly.
Just general taping.
85
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And I've got a torch pen.
86
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CHERRY: Is duck tape
waterproofing? DUCT tape!
87
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Don't know.
SUE: OF course it is.
88
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That's why it's called DUCK tape.
CHERRY: Ah!
89
00:03:45,240 --> 00:03:47,039
It's not called duck tape!
90
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It's not... Yeah, it is.
It's called DUCT tape.
91
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You have to pronounce both of
the Ts.
92
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DUCK tape... Right.
..is a brand name.
93
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As fascinating as this is,
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I have got to go and meet Katie.
95
00:03:58,280 --> 00:04:02,399
So we're looking after Atlas again,
aren't we? Yeah. I am, yeah.
96
00:04:02,400 --> 00:04:06,279
I want to get as much of him as
I can before my big trip.
97
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Oh, well, actually, Paolo,
on the Atlas front,
98
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we did want to ask
if you'd be interested
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in being one of the godfathers
at the christening.
100
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Oh! Really?! Yeah.
Yeah, well, Rache is godmother.
101
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Oh... Oh, my godfathers!
LAUGHTER
102
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I've never been asked to be
a godfather before!
103
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Oh, well, this is wondrous news!
Wondrous! All right...
104
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I promise I won't let you down,
guys. OK.
105
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Or you, guy! Bit weird.
106
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That is a Godfather guarantee.
107
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I should have...I should have
to work on my Godfather impression.
108
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HE GRUNTS, DOORBELL RINGS
Doorbell! Sh!
109
00:04:36,880 --> 00:04:40,319
Oh, for God... You're going to wake
Atlas up! I'll go.
110
00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:43,079
Why ain't you got any keys?
Why haven't you got any friends?
111
00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:45,599
OK. Nice to see you, too.
Hi, Graham.
112
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It's G, not Graham.
OK, cool.
113
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ITALIAN-AMERICAN ACCENT: Don't take
the piss out of my pizza,
114
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you dirty rat! Eh?
115
00:04:53,080 --> 00:04:55,479
What are you doing?
Huh? Oh, nothing.
116
00:04:55,480 --> 00:04:58,159
Hi, Graham. Hi. G. It's G now.
Hello. Hi.
117
00:04:58,160 --> 00:05:00,759
Yes, sorry. He was just doing
a Marlon Brando impression from
118
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The Godfather. It doesn't...
It doesn't matter.
119
00:05:02,560 --> 00:05:05,199
"Don't take the piss out of my
pizza"? That's not in the film.
120
00:05:05,200 --> 00:05:07,919
Well, that's sort of it, isn't it?
Mm... You know?
121
00:05:07,920 --> 00:05:09,519
Um... No. Sorry, Graham, is that...?
122
00:05:09,520 --> 00:05:12,159
That's not a guitar in there,
is there? Oh! Wow!
123
00:05:12,160 --> 00:05:14,559
Detective Jessop has done it again!
124
00:05:14,560 --> 00:05:17,919
G, yeah. Why? Well, just because
the baby's asleep over there.
125
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You can't shred your axe in here,
mate. We want to rehearse.
126
00:05:21,120 --> 00:05:24,319
My keyboard's upstairs. OK.
Why else would I come over?
127
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RACHEL: To use the Wi-Fi?
To get your washing done?
128
00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:30,679
To have a bath? Oh, you find quite
a few reasons, Amy. Yeah.
129
00:05:30,680 --> 00:05:32,959
Why can't you just get your keyboard
and take it back to your flat?
130
00:05:32,960 --> 00:05:36,279
Because it's heavy. Oh.
And Maya's...
131
00:05:36,280 --> 00:05:39,079
Well, we're trying to give each
other space while she packs up.
132
00:05:39,080 --> 00:05:43,239
Aw! Yeah. So, anyway,
we really need to practise.
133
00:05:43,240 --> 00:05:45,879
Aw, are you that bad, are you?
We... Thanks.
134
00:05:45,880 --> 00:05:49,119
We've got Bedford Battle of
the Bands next month. Whoa!
135
00:05:49,120 --> 00:05:52,199
BBOTB?! No way! Is that still
going? Yeah, and we're playing
136
00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:54,880
the Lamb and Flag next week.
Oh, I know! I can't wait!
137
00:05:56,240 --> 00:05:59,839
You're coming? Yeah.
I am a good luck charm, G.
138
00:05:59,840 --> 00:06:03,079
I saw the Beatles
when they were still tiny.
139
00:06:03,080 --> 00:06:04,879
And look how well they did.
140
00:06:04,880 --> 00:06:06,759
Very, very well.
141
00:06:06,760 --> 00:06:08,599
Did you? I didn't know that.
142
00:06:08,600 --> 00:06:11,439
Yeah, in 1961. I was only 15.
143
00:06:11,440 --> 00:06:14,159
I gave George Harrison a cigarette.
144
00:06:14,160 --> 00:06:16,159
Ah!
LAUGHTER
145
00:06:16,160 --> 00:06:19,879
George Harrison actually died
of lung cancer, so...
146
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:22,679
Yeah, but that wasn't Sue's fault,
was it?
147
00:06:22,680 --> 00:06:26,119
No. You didn't give him
his first cigarette, did you?
148
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LAUGHTER
149
00:06:28,080 --> 00:06:29,839
Or did you?
150
00:06:29,840 --> 00:06:31,919
I don't know.
151
00:06:31,920 --> 00:06:34,519
I mean, he didn't have any of his
own, or a lighter,
152
00:06:34,520 --> 00:06:36,519
so I suppose it's possible.
153
00:06:36,520 --> 00:06:37,999
Oh...
154
00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:40,880
Oh, my God.
You killed George. Oh, God.
155
00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:45,119
I mean,
I'm sure that's not strictly true,
156
00:06:45,120 --> 00:06:47,839
Graham...G, you know,
legally speaking... Can't prove it.
157
00:06:47,840 --> 00:06:51,199
No. He must have smoked before that.
He must have. Yeah!
158
00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:53,279
That's all anyone did in those days.
159
00:06:53,280 --> 00:06:56,439
Oh, babe, babe!
It's on Sunday the 14th. Right.
160
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So we can go to BBOTB after the
christening do at the George,
161
00:06:58,840 --> 00:07:01,799
make a night of it.
PAUL MIMICS BASSLINE
162
00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:03,879
Not if you do that.
What was that?
163
00:07:03,880 --> 00:07:05,839
Would Atlas like that, or...?
164
00:07:05,840 --> 00:07:08,199
He might, actually.
Would he? OK.
165
00:07:08,200 --> 00:07:10,239
He really likes white noise.
166
00:07:10,240 --> 00:07:13,039
Yeah. OK, well, that's not actually
what we play, but...
167
00:07:13,040 --> 00:07:15,679
We've got BBOTB. I haven't been
there for about 15 years.
168
00:07:15,680 --> 00:07:17,239
I cannot wait to go back.
169
00:07:17,240 --> 00:07:19,559
BRANDO VOICE: Just when you think
you've left the Mafia for good...
170
00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:22,479
Doing it again!
..they ask you back to the Mafia.
171
00:07:22,480 --> 00:07:24,119
SAM: I mean, that's not even close,
Dad.
172
00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:26,479
Well, it's sort of general gist,
isn't it? Well...
173
00:07:26,480 --> 00:07:29,239
Hang on, Paul,
you have been christened, right?
174
00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:32,559
Because to be a godfather,
you have to have been christened.
175
00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:35,599
Uh, I don't know. You had me
christened, didn't you, Mum?
176
00:07:35,600 --> 00:07:37,559
Uh, hang on, let me think.
177
00:07:37,560 --> 00:07:39,839
Uh, we definitely had you
circumcised. Oh, my God!
178
00:07:39,840 --> 00:07:41,759
Oh, well, I'm aware of that.
Thank you!
179
00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:43,639
Thank you for telling
Cherry and G that!
180
00:07:43,640 --> 00:07:46,999
GRAHAM: I don't care.
No, but christened, I think...
181
00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:50,479
No. Really?! Why?
182
00:07:50,480 --> 00:07:52,839
Because I don't believe in God.
183
00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:55,319
But you do believe in ghosts,
though, don't you, Sue?
184
00:07:55,320 --> 00:07:56,559
Well, that's different.
185
00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:59,639
Ghosts and angels I've
got no problem with. Mm.
186
00:07:59,640 --> 00:08:03,119
So you believe in angels,
but you don't believe in God?
187
00:08:03,120 --> 00:08:04,799
Well, who are they working for,
then?!
188
00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:06,719
Well, no-one. They're freelance.
189
00:08:06,720 --> 00:08:10,519
CHERRY: I'm sorry, Paul, but
Father Damian is well strict
190
00:08:10,520 --> 00:08:11,959
about this stuff, so...
191
00:08:11,960 --> 00:08:14,479
I mean, can't you just tell
Father Damian
192
00:08:14,480 --> 00:08:16,839
that I'm christened anyway?
193
00:08:16,840 --> 00:08:20,279
Well, no, because
Sue says you haven't been, so...
194
00:08:20,280 --> 00:08:23,639
Yeah, but she can...
You know. What?
195
00:08:23,640 --> 00:08:25,039
Lie.
CHERRY GASPS
196
00:08:25,040 --> 00:08:27,199
SUE: No, no, I'm not doing that!
CHERRY: No!
197
00:08:27,200 --> 00:08:29,399
Well, why not?!
No-one will know!
198
00:08:29,400 --> 00:08:32,439
God will! You don't believe in God!
199
00:08:32,440 --> 00:08:35,399
Exactly! So I'm already
in his bad books, aren't I? Ugh...!
200
00:08:35,400 --> 00:08:38,079
I've got a feeling that Dean hasn't
been christened either. No.
201
00:08:38,080 --> 00:08:41,239
Ah, well, he's out an'all, then.
Oh! Oh, really? Yeah.
202
00:08:41,240 --> 00:08:45,119
GRAHAM: Just get christened now,
as an adult. PAUL: What?!
203
00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:47,159
Well... What, you can do that?!
204
00:08:47,160 --> 00:08:49,639
Yeah, I mean, it's a lot of faff
when you're old, like,
205
00:08:49,640 --> 00:08:52,039
it's like the chicken pox, you know
what I mean? You want to get it when
206
00:08:52,040 --> 00:08:54,679
you're a kid. It just depends on how
much you want to be a godfather,
207
00:08:54,680 --> 00:08:58,479
really. Big, a big amount.
Big amount? Please.
208
00:08:58,480 --> 00:09:02,839
You see? There's nowhere to park!
It's all double yellow! Oh...!
209
00:09:02,840 --> 00:09:05,679
Just bang on your hazards and park
where you like, Rachel.
210
00:09:05,680 --> 00:09:08,039
That's what I do.
Yes, well, you shouldn't, Sue!
211
00:09:08,040 --> 00:09:09,799
I hate it when people do that!
212
00:09:09,800 --> 00:09:11,519
Oh, not the multistorey, Rachel!
213
00:09:11,520 --> 00:09:13,999
There's no time!
Yes, it will work out quicker.
214
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:18,159
Go, go.
PAUL GROANS
215
00:09:18,160 --> 00:09:20,159
You'll have to get out, Mum. OK.
216
00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:23,519
Has anyone got a pen or something?
Oh, yes, I have. Oh, great, Sue.
217
00:09:23,520 --> 00:09:25,639
Come on, come on. Go, go, go.
218
00:09:25,640 --> 00:09:28,319
Just get out of the car!
No, I don't need to!
219
00:09:28,320 --> 00:09:29,639
It won't work, Mum.
220
00:09:29,640 --> 00:09:31,919
SHE GRUNTS
221
00:09:31,920 --> 00:09:34,959
Ah! Oh, well done, Mum! OK, quickly,
quickly, quickly, please, Rache!
222
00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:37,850
Thank you. There you go.
How are you going to get the ticket?
223
00:09:38,720 --> 00:09:40,599
OK, I'll just get out of the car.
224
00:09:40,600 --> 00:09:42,079
Right.
225
00:09:42,080 --> 00:09:44,119
Oh! Argh!
226
00:09:44,120 --> 00:09:47,319
Are you all right?
Whew! Got it. Let's go!
227
00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:49,839
PAUL GASPS
228
00:09:49,840 --> 00:09:53,519
Just hold it in, Paul.
Yes, thank you, Mum! Great advice!
229
00:09:53,520 --> 00:09:55,239
Are you all right, Rachel? No!
230
00:09:55,240 --> 00:09:58,959
I think I must have twisted my knee
when reaching for the ticket. Ow!
231
00:09:58,960 --> 00:10:00,759
Oh, gosh. Sorry.
232
00:10:00,760 --> 00:10:02,959
Hello. Hi. Hi. Hi.
233
00:10:02,960 --> 00:10:07,559
Can we have some Imodium... Please!
..and a knee support, please?
234
00:10:07,560 --> 00:10:09,639
As quickly as possible. Thank you.
235
00:10:09,640 --> 00:10:11,679
Uh, is that for the same problem?
No. No! No.
236
00:10:11,680 --> 00:10:14,079
The Imodium is for him,
and I need the knee support.
237
00:10:14,080 --> 00:10:16,999
I've been over-squatting recently.
Well, we both have.
238
00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:20,279
Chill out!
Uh, we don't sell knee supports.
239
00:10:20,280 --> 00:10:24,599
Oh, well, any kind of strapping,
something to make it less...?
240
00:10:24,600 --> 00:10:26,799
Please, where are your toilets?
241
00:10:26,800 --> 00:10:29,199
Oh, no, toilets are staff only.
242
00:10:29,200 --> 00:10:31,359
Well, this is an emergency!
243
00:10:31,360 --> 00:10:34,079
Yeah. Sorry. Oh, "Sorry," as in
244
00:10:34,080 --> 00:10:36,719
you'd rather me evacuate my bowels
in your chemist's?
245
00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:39,159
Oh, don't do that!
No, don't do that. Well...
246
00:10:39,160 --> 00:10:42,159
Do you sell adult nappies?
No, Mum! No? No!
247
00:10:42,160 --> 00:10:44,359
No, we're not going to do that!
248
00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:46,039
I don't want to. Ignore her.
249
00:10:46,040 --> 00:10:47,919
There's a pub across the road.
250
00:10:47,920 --> 00:10:52,399
Oh, look, I hate going to
a pub toilet when I'm not a patron.
251
00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:55,319
Go on, just hold it in.
I want these ones, Mum.
252
00:10:55,320 --> 00:10:58,279
Right. Oh...
SAM: Sorry.
253
00:10:58,280 --> 00:11:01,599
Wow! Thank you.
She can stay like that for hours.
254
00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:04,519
Really? Easy.
I could sleep like this.
255
00:11:04,520 --> 00:11:06,879
Amy, can you turn it down up there,
please?!
256
00:11:06,880 --> 00:11:08,719
Sometimes I think Katie's left
the flat -
257
00:11:08,720 --> 00:11:10,239
she's just squatting behind
the sofa.
258
00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:13,039
Oh, my God. That has happened.
Yeah. Sorry, our daughter's just
259
00:11:13,040 --> 00:11:15,439
rehearsing upstairs.
And that's good for you, is it?
260
00:11:15,440 --> 00:11:17,479
Well, let me put it this way,
Rachel.
261
00:11:17,480 --> 00:11:20,439
Yeah? This is great.
How old do you think I am?
262
00:11:20,440 --> 00:11:22,679
Oh... Oh... Go on.
263
00:11:22,680 --> 00:11:24,639
Uh, 36? Be honest. 34.
264
00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:27,839
Last year, I got ID'd at the cinema
265
00:11:27,840 --> 00:11:32,999
going to see Godzilla vs Kong 2.
Mm. Really? That's a 12, isn't it?
266
00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:36,199
Exactly. Someone thought
you were 11? Or under.
267
00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:38,479
The other day I went to get a train
ticket, and the guy in the
268
00:11:38,480 --> 00:11:40,119
booth goes... Oh, I love this one.
269
00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:42,799
.."Why aren't you using your young
person's railcard?"
270
00:11:42,800 --> 00:11:46,959
And I was like, "Because I'm 40!"
Oh, so 40, 40.
271
00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:49,399
I know, it's mad, isn't it? Yeah.
272
00:11:49,400 --> 00:11:53,119
Yeah. Wow. What's this? Look at
this. OK. This is a doggy piddle.
273
00:11:53,120 --> 00:11:58,119
OK. Yeah. You do this every single
day for 20 minutes,
274
00:11:58,120 --> 00:12:01,519
you'll live past 100. OK, wow.
Quite hard to prove that.
275
00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:04,159
Drop a squat for me, Rachel.
Oh, my gosh. Yeah.
276
00:12:04,160 --> 00:12:06,439
What, right now? Well, yeah,
if I'm going to take you on,
277
00:12:06,440 --> 00:12:09,399
I need to see what I'm dealing with.
OK, yeah. Go on, Rach. OK.
278
00:12:09,400 --> 00:12:12,199
Breathe. No problem.
Yeah, all right. Hup...!
279
00:12:12,200 --> 00:12:14,479
CRACKING
Oh! Oh!
280
00:12:14,480 --> 00:12:17,199
Oh, my God! What was that?
Was that me? That was awful.
281
00:12:17,200 --> 00:12:18,999
Sorry, I do click, don't I?
282
00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:20,639
She clicks. She does click.
283
00:12:20,640 --> 00:12:24,279
She needs a bath. A bit stiff,
a bit stiff, a bit old. Oh, no,
284
00:12:24,280 --> 00:12:26,399
that's OK, that's OK, that's OK.
285
00:12:26,400 --> 00:12:29,559
Thank you. Now just engage
your core for me.
286
00:12:29,560 --> 00:12:31,440
My what? Your core.
287
00:12:33,040 --> 00:12:35,839
Engage. Am I doing it?
No. No, I'm not.
288
00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:38,519
I wasn't... That's all right.
Here's your Horlicks, then, Paul.
289
00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:41,719
Oh, thanks, Mum. Hey, Dean? Ooh!
290
00:12:41,720 --> 00:12:43,879
I think you're punching
above your weight there.
291
00:12:43,880 --> 00:12:47,320
Well, we both are. Yeah, I'm
not sure it works like that.
292
00:12:49,600 --> 00:12:51,479
So, how did you two meet?
293
00:12:51,480 --> 00:12:55,679
Oh, so, I was in Costa Coffee,
294
00:12:55,680 --> 00:12:57,399
Katie was sitting at another table.
295
00:12:57,400 --> 00:13:00,959
Yeah? And when she got up to leave,
I noticed she'd left her phone.
296
00:13:00,960 --> 00:13:03,159
Right. So you returned it to her?
297
00:13:03,160 --> 00:13:04,799
No, I stole it.
298
00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:06,679
Then later, the phone rings,
I answer it,
299
00:13:06,680 --> 00:13:08,479
say I found it, and arranged to
meet up with her.
300
00:13:08,480 --> 00:13:10,879
You know, collect the reward.
OK. Then we got on really well.
301
00:13:10,880 --> 00:13:12,919
It's romantic, innit?
302
00:13:12,920 --> 00:13:15,039
Almost. Yeah.
303
00:13:15,040 --> 00:13:16,839
So, you got a reward?
304
00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:19,319
Well, I mean, Katie's my reward,
really.
305
00:13:19,320 --> 00:13:21,279
But, yeah, �80.
306
00:13:21,280 --> 00:13:23,319
Don't tell her the part
where I stole the phone.
307
00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:26,319
Oh, I won't, I won't. OK.
308
00:13:26,320 --> 00:13:28,599
Oh, we're good
for getting dunked on Sunday?
309
00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:30,559
Uh, dunked? Yeah. Baptised.
310
00:13:30,560 --> 00:13:32,519
Father Damian's agreed
to do it for us.
311
00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:34,959
Dunk the doughnuts.
Good to godfather!
312
00:13:34,960 --> 00:13:37,199
Oh, well done, Dean! Ha-ha!
313
00:13:37,200 --> 00:13:39,199
Oh, hi, love. How's it going?
314
00:13:39,200 --> 00:13:42,199
Hi, Granny. Are you looking forward
to your big gig?
315
00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:45,159
Oh, yeah. Nervous but excited.
316
00:13:45,160 --> 00:13:48,119
You were terrific
at the Lamb and Flag.
317
00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:50,719
Thanks. You said, a few times.
318
00:13:50,720 --> 00:13:52,639
Uh, I actually...
319
00:13:52,640 --> 00:13:56,359
About that. G worries that, um,
you know, while we're...
320
00:13:56,360 --> 00:13:58,559
..while we're still quite unknown,
321
00:13:58,560 --> 00:14:01,479
don't have many fans - or any fans,
really...
322
00:14:01,480 --> 00:14:02,639
You've got me.
323
00:14:02,640 --> 00:14:04,359
Exactly. That's...
324
00:14:04,360 --> 00:14:08,279
Yeah. He's just wondering
if you could maybe...
325
00:14:08,280 --> 00:14:10,159
I'm sorry to ask you, but.
326
00:14:10,160 --> 00:14:13,639
..not come to our gigs, for a bit,
327
00:14:13,640 --> 00:14:17,039
just until you can blend
in more with other people.
328
00:14:17,040 --> 00:14:20,879
Is G still angry with me
about killing George Harrison?
329
00:14:20,880 --> 00:14:24,520
Oh, no. No, it's not that.
It's the... The dancing.
330
00:14:26,040 --> 00:14:27,639
Um...
331
00:14:27,640 --> 00:14:30,560
It's just the whole thing.
The optics, you know?
332
00:14:32,120 --> 00:14:35,119
Of course. Thanks. Sorry.
333
00:14:35,120 --> 00:14:36,919
Who killed George Harrison, then?
334
00:14:36,920 --> 00:14:39,079
Uh... Oh, me. Maybe.
335
00:14:39,080 --> 00:14:43,799
Unless he started smoking
before 1961. Mm. Interesting.
336
00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:44,999
RACHEL: Oh, my God!
337
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:48,639
Why? You like the Beatles, do you?
Well, I like Thomas the Tank Engine,
338
00:14:48,640 --> 00:14:50,519
and I know Ringo Starr
does the voice for that, so...
339
00:14:50,520 --> 00:14:51,959
So, no, then?
340
00:14:51,960 --> 00:14:55,079
RACHEL MOANS
Lower! Go low or go home.
341
00:14:55,080 --> 00:14:57,550
I think this is as low as it goes,
actually, Katie.
342
00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:01,920
OK. Oh!
343
00:15:01,921 --> 00:15:06,159
Just head straight for the toilets.
It's all about confidence.
344
00:15:06,160 --> 00:15:08,799
I'm not confident, am I? This is
why I find the modern world
345
00:15:08,800 --> 00:15:10,279
generally horrible!
346
00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:12,599
This is The George This is where the
christening do is happening later.
347
00:15:12,600 --> 00:15:14,239
Is it? Yeah. Oh, good!
348
00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:15,680
Oh!
349
00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:19,280
Oh! It's the ladies.
350
00:15:20,311 --> 00:15:26,439
Toilets are for customers only, bro.
I know. I know, I know, I know,
351
00:15:26,440 --> 00:15:29,119
so... And it doesn't matter because
I am a customer. I'm coming to
352
00:15:29,120 --> 00:15:32,359
the post-christening do here later,
so... OK, so you can use the toilet
353
00:15:32,360 --> 00:15:35,759
later, when you are a customer.
OK, well, I can just buy something
354
00:15:35,760 --> 00:15:37,799
now if that's... Sure.
What can I get you, bro?
355
00:15:37,800 --> 00:15:39,919
Um... Do you have Horlicks?
356
00:15:39,920 --> 00:15:44,519
Don't get a Horlicks!
A pint of Guinness, please.
357
00:15:44,520 --> 00:15:46,239
A pint?
Why are you getting a pint?
358
00:15:46,240 --> 00:15:50,279
Just get a half. It's too late now,
Sam. I've already ordered it.
359
00:15:50,280 --> 00:15:52,919
And, bro, bro, can you please, uh,
360
00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:56,799
refill my hot-bot for me
while I'm in the gents?
361
00:15:56,800 --> 00:15:59,079
My hot water bottle.
Thank you so much. Oh, my God!
362
00:15:59,080 --> 00:16:02,839
Sure. And I'll have a shot of vodka.
Really?
363
00:16:02,840 --> 00:16:06,519
Yeah. Just need something to, um...
I'm shitting myself a bit.
364
00:16:06,520 --> 00:16:09,159
Aw! Oh!
I've got the Imodium in my bag.
365
00:16:09,160 --> 00:16:12,759
No, no, I mean I'm nervous about
the gig later.
366
00:16:12,760 --> 00:16:16,359
Oh, I see.
And could I have some ice, please?
367
00:16:16,360 --> 00:16:20,079
Sure. Ice water, or...?
Yes, but without the water.
368
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:22,759
My knees are very sore.
I've been working out,
369
00:16:22,760 --> 00:16:24,919
I guess, too much. Stretch them out.
Yeah, just stretch them out.
370
00:16:24,920 --> 00:16:28,199
I'll squat. Yeah.
SAM: You should be careful, Mum.
371
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:30,879
Look, don't worry.
You'll be amazing.
372
00:16:30,880 --> 00:16:32,719
I can't wait to see it.
373
00:16:32,720 --> 00:16:37,519
You...? Uh... No, I mean Sammy's
film of it afterwards.
374
00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:40,599
No, don't worry, I, uh...
I won't be there.
375
00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:44,079
BARMAN: Where's the ice lady?
I'm here. I was squatting,
376
00:16:44,080 --> 00:16:45,800
which hasn't helped at all!
377
00:16:47,320 --> 00:16:49,559
Can I order some nuggets, please?
378
00:16:49,560 --> 00:16:51,679
Deano! Go on, Dean!
379
00:16:51,680 --> 00:16:53,759
Dunk the hunk. Oh, well done, Dean.
380
00:16:53,760 --> 00:16:56,359
Well done. In that water!
381
00:16:56,360 --> 00:16:58,439
Incredible, son. Look at him go.
382
00:16:58,440 --> 00:17:00,879
I baptise you in the name of
the Father... God.
383
00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:02,759
..the Son... Jesus.
..and the Holy Spirit. No idea.
384
00:17:02,760 --> 00:17:04,319
Oh, my God!
385
00:17:04,320 --> 00:17:07,599
CHEERING, APPLAUSE
386
00:17:07,600 --> 00:17:09,999
Deano! Well done.
387
00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:13,439
Peace be with you. Yeah.
Wet T-shirt competition, anyone?
388
00:17:13,440 --> 00:17:16,079
Oh, it's lovely here, isn't it?
389
00:17:16,080 --> 00:17:18,999
Yeah, it's really nice, Mum.
390
00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:21,840
Just a shame about
the sewage company. Yeah.
391
00:17:23,280 --> 00:17:25,959
Sorry... What do you mean?
392
00:17:25,960 --> 00:17:27,919
Over 4,000 hours,
393
00:17:27,920 --> 00:17:31,919
discharging raw faeces last year,
apparently.
394
00:17:31,920 --> 00:17:33,959
OK, Paul. You ready? Uh...
395
00:17:33,960 --> 00:17:35,639
Yeah. Sorry, Father.
396
00:17:35,640 --> 00:17:38,039
Where was this, Mum?
Wasn't here, was it?
397
00:17:38,040 --> 00:17:39,799
So this is a full-immersion baptism.
398
00:17:39,800 --> 00:17:41,439
The best thing is to hold on to me,
399
00:17:41,440 --> 00:17:43,719
and I'll guide you in and out of
the water.
400
00:17:43,720 --> 00:17:46,319
Well, OK. It can mess you up,
by the way.
401
00:17:46,320 --> 00:17:48,479
You know, the squatting, like,
stuff can suddenly,
402
00:17:48,480 --> 00:17:51,159
like, ping or crunch in your back
and your knees.
403
00:17:51,160 --> 00:17:54,479
So, like, if you want to get some
straps or sport tape now...
404
00:17:54,480 --> 00:17:57,079
Sport tape?
No, I think I'll be OK.
405
00:17:57,080 --> 00:18:01,159
Thank you. You know, I'm naturally
quite a flexible person.
406
00:18:01,160 --> 00:18:05,559
Um, and Katie says my technique
is excellent, so, um...
407
00:18:05,560 --> 00:18:08,199
You got this, Paolo!
Oh, here he goes.
408
00:18:08,200 --> 00:18:10,119
Keep your mouth closed, Paul.
409
00:18:10,120 --> 00:18:13,919
I baptise you in the name of
the Father, Son,
410
00:18:13,920 --> 00:18:16,359
and the Holy Spirit.
Yay! Woo!
411
00:18:16,360 --> 00:18:18,759
OK, um... That didn't work. Huh?!
412
00:18:18,760 --> 00:18:21,039
Your hands, they didn't go under.
413
00:18:21,040 --> 00:18:22,839
Right. Well, can I just pop it
in now?
414
00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:25,079
We have to do it again. What?
The whole thing?
415
00:18:25,080 --> 00:18:27,079
Full immersion.
Some of it went up my nose!
416
00:18:27,080 --> 00:18:30,439
Oh, my God. I baptise you
in the name of the Father,
417
00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:32,519
Son, and the Holy Spirit.
418
00:18:32,520 --> 00:18:33,999
Oh, hang on! Woo!
419
00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:36,639
Paul! Woo!
You have to keep your hands down!
420
00:18:36,640 --> 00:18:40,039
Full immersion, Paul. Got to get...
Full immersion. ..hands in.
421
00:18:40,040 --> 00:18:42,079
Don't thumbs up. We'll have to do it
again. DEAN: I went under.
422
00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:44,559
I baptise you in the name of
the Father... Come on!
423
00:18:44,560 --> 00:18:46,959
the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
Oh, God!
424
00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:48,839
OK. That's not going to work.
Your hands, Paul!
425
00:18:48,840 --> 00:18:50,719
You need to keep your hands in.
426
00:18:50,720 --> 00:18:53,759
All right, just give us a chance,
all right? I'll get there!
427
00:18:53,760 --> 00:18:56,519
DEAN: I did make it look easy, to be
fair. Let's try again!
428
00:18:56,520 --> 00:18:58,439
Can we tie him up?
429
00:18:58,440 --> 00:19:00,879
SUE: Right. Off we go, then.
430
00:19:00,880 --> 00:19:02,759
Hurry up, Paul.
431
00:19:02,760 --> 00:19:07,119
Yes, I know. I've just downed
a pint of Guinness, Mum.
432
00:19:07,120 --> 00:19:10,079
OK? And Rache is still...
Come on, Rache!
433
00:19:10,080 --> 00:19:11,879
RACHEL GROANS
434
00:19:11,880 --> 00:19:14,399
It was you that made us stop
in the first place!
435
00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:16,479
And it was Sam who ordered food!
436
00:19:16,480 --> 00:19:19,079
Yeah, I can't believe you ordered
nuggets, mate.
437
00:19:19,080 --> 00:19:22,119
What?! My nuggets came quicker
than your nuggets.
438
00:19:22,120 --> 00:19:27,479
I wish mine were nuggets.
It was more like...McFlurry. Oh!
439
00:19:27,480 --> 00:19:29,759
You all right, Rachel, love?
440
00:19:29,760 --> 00:19:33,199
No, Sue, it's my knees.
They're throbbing!
441
00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:36,000
Oh... I just need something to
sort of hold them.
442
00:19:37,040 --> 00:19:41,040
Oh, I know. Amy, come and help.
443
00:19:43,160 --> 00:19:45,439
That's it. Now, how is
that Rachel, love?
444
00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:48,399
Yeah, pretty good, actually,
mobility-wise.
445
00:19:48,400 --> 00:19:50,839
Not sure what it does to my outfit
exactly, but...
446
00:19:50,840 --> 00:19:53,599
You look a bit like RoboCop. Yeah.
447
00:19:53,600 --> 00:19:55,799
You know, it's starting, like,
right now?
448
00:19:55,800 --> 00:19:59,159
Oh, God! Oh!
Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. OK.
449
00:19:59,160 --> 00:20:02,039
When's the actual water bit?
Well, can you drag it out?
450
00:20:02,040 --> 00:20:03,479
Can you sing another hymn?
451
00:20:03,480 --> 00:20:05,959
No, no, don't do that!
Do not do that!
452
00:20:05,960 --> 00:20:10,119
Robin is suggesting that Katie
and Jelson step in as godparents!
453
00:20:10,120 --> 00:20:13,359
No! No way! We will be there!
No way, Robin! We will be there!
454
00:20:13,360 --> 00:20:15,239
All right? There is
a godparent promise.
455
00:20:15,240 --> 00:20:16,799
A God promise!
456
00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:20,519
Just park closer to the machine,
Mum! I tried, Amy!
457
00:20:20,520 --> 00:20:22,959
I can do it.
Just get out the car, Mum!
458
00:20:22,960 --> 00:20:26,079
I...can...reach. Rachel!
SHE STRAINS
459
00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:28,599
CRACKING, SHE MOANS
ALL: Oh!
460
00:20:28,600 --> 00:20:31,759
I heard that. Oh, God! Oh, Rachel!
I think I've done my back!
461
00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:33,759
Oh, Mum! Oh, I've done my back!
462
00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:35,759
We're really late, by the way.
463
00:20:35,760 --> 00:20:37,479
Yeah. Come on, Rache!
464
00:20:37,480 --> 00:20:38,759
Quick!
465
00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:40,750
Oh, I hope there's a toilet in here!
Sh!
466
00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:45,680
Hello...
467
00:20:46,760 --> 00:20:48,239
..everyone.
468
00:20:48,240 --> 00:20:50,320
PAUL GROANS
469
00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:55,280
Sorry. Oh... Right.
470
00:20:59,080 --> 00:21:00,400
Sorry.
471
00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:08,479
Oh, babe, have you been shopping
in TK Maxx again?
472
00:21:08,480 --> 00:21:10,119
TK Maxx? No. It's tape.
473
00:21:10,120 --> 00:21:13,679
The service started 20 minutes ago.
20 minutes ago.
474
00:21:13,680 --> 00:21:16,039
Yeah, well, great. I'm very ill.
475
00:21:16,040 --> 00:21:18,639
Hence the hot-bot. Amy, can you sort
us out a couple of chairs, please?
476
00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:20,479
Could you please, Amy? Right.
Well, you shouldn't come to
477
00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:21,919
church if you're sick. Well, you
478
00:21:21,920 --> 00:21:24,239
shouldn't dunk people
in faecal water.
479
00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:26,879
I mean, why do it in a river at all?
Dad, chill!
480
00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:28,799
Jesus was baptised
in the River Jordan.
481
00:21:28,800 --> 00:21:31,239
OK, well, I'm guessing
Anglian Water
482
00:21:31,240 --> 00:21:34,759
didn't illegally dump sewage
into that beforehand!
483
00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:36,759
Oh! And that doesn't explain
why she's wrapped in...
484
00:21:36,760 --> 00:21:38,079
Is that duck tape?! Yeah.
485
00:21:38,080 --> 00:21:40,359
It's DUCT tape!
It is. It is duck tape, yes.
486
00:21:40,360 --> 00:21:42,679
That's what I said. No, it's not.
487
00:21:42,680 --> 00:21:45,319
I got a bit carried away.
CHUCKLING
488
00:21:45,320 --> 00:21:48,639
I've been doing too many squats.
Not possible.
489
00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:50,799
It is possible, Katie.
I can't bend my knees.
490
00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:53,719
Sit down, Mum. Thank you.
She looks like the Tin Man.
491
00:21:53,720 --> 00:21:56,439
I said RoboCop.
Anyone silver, basically.
492
00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:58,199
Can I continue with the baptism now?
493
00:21:58,200 --> 00:22:00,839
Yeah, sorry, I've just got to nip to
the loo quickly. Very quickly.
494
00:22:00,840 --> 00:22:02,319
I've just downed a pint of Guinness!
495
00:22:02,320 --> 00:22:04,719
Legend. Nope. No time.
496
00:22:04,720 --> 00:22:07,199
If you can't stand by the font
as a godparent,
497
00:22:07,200 --> 00:22:09,039
I'm afraid you'll have
to sit it out.
498
00:22:09,040 --> 00:22:12,239
OK, fine. Forget it.
Sorry, Katie. Sorry, Jelson.
499
00:22:12,240 --> 00:22:14,360
I'm ready. Righto. Off you go.
500
00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:18,199
Didn't want to do it anyway.
Oh, my God, Mum.
501
00:22:18,200 --> 00:22:19,959
No, it's all right, I just can't...
I'll just tip you out.
502
00:22:19,960 --> 00:22:21,999
Just tip it a bit...
Will your legs hold? Thank you.
503
00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:23,879
Parents and godparents,
504
00:22:23,880 --> 00:22:25,959
is it your wish
for Atlas Bruce to be baptised
505
00:22:25,960 --> 00:22:29,639
in the faith of the church, which
you've all professed with you? Yes.
506
00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:31,999
Big time. It is.
Atlas Bruce... OK.
507
00:22:32,000 --> 00:22:35,319
..I baptise you in the name
of the Father... Come on, Atlas.
508
00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:37,680
..the Son, and the...
Whoa, Dad!
509
00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:41,879
Oh, no... Sh! What's he doing?
510
00:22:41,880 --> 00:22:44,399
Stop it! Hmm? What?
511
00:22:44,400 --> 00:22:46,959
SUE: Oh, Paul!
512
00:22:46,960 --> 00:22:49,919
I said we should have
got you some nappies!
513
00:22:49,920 --> 00:22:53,159
Oh, gross! Oh, my God!
What? What is it? Dad!
514
00:22:53,160 --> 00:22:55,839
"What is it?" Do you seriously not
even know you're doing it?
515
00:22:55,840 --> 00:22:59,279
It's your strides, mate. Huh?
Your trousers. Oh, my God! Oh!
516
00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:01,359
I'm so sorry. Oh, no!
517
00:23:01,360 --> 00:23:05,079
Oh, it's my hot-bot!
Oh! It's my hot-bot.
518
00:23:05,080 --> 00:23:09,079
It's leaking! It's not urine.
The duct tape has lost its adhesion,
519
00:23:09,080 --> 00:23:11,079
so it's leaking.
I've not wet myself!
520
00:23:11,080 --> 00:23:13,399
Well, you have. No, I haven't.
Not in a bad way.
521
00:23:13,400 --> 00:23:15,639
No. It's fine, I'm fine.
Carry on, please.
522
00:23:15,640 --> 00:23:17,279
Oh, gosh, no. Hang on.
I'm about to...
523
00:23:17,280 --> 00:23:21,639
I'm about to buckle, if someone...
Oh! Got you, Rache! OK? Oh, God!
524
00:23:21,640 --> 00:23:23,719
I can't bend, you see. Yeah, I
know. It's wet.
525
00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:26,039
Slide her through the urine... Yeah.
Slide her through Paul's urine.
526
00:23:26,040 --> 00:23:28,519
It's not urine. It's not urine!
527
00:23:28,520 --> 00:23:31,239
It's not urine! OK...
It smells like urine.
528
00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:32,759
Oh, my God! It's not urine!
529
00:23:32,760 --> 00:23:35,559
This isn't a great look at all.
I'm so sorry. Carry on.
530
00:23:35,560 --> 00:23:37,639
I baptise you in
the name of the Father,
531
00:23:37,640 --> 00:23:40,119
Son, and the Holy Spirit.
It's not urine!
532
00:23:40,120 --> 00:23:42,279
Godparents in, then? Just cut out
the trousers. I don't want the
533
00:23:42,280 --> 00:23:44,359
trousers in. I'm trying to, babe.
I'm trying to.
534
00:23:44,360 --> 00:23:46,879
CHATTER, BABY CRIES
Do you just do this all the time?
535
00:23:46,880 --> 00:23:48,359
Everyone say, "Baby!"
536
00:23:48,360 --> 00:23:52,119
Sue? Dean thought you might like to
see a photo.
537
00:23:52,120 --> 00:23:55,759
Oh, right. Hang on.
It's not a willy one, is it?
538
00:23:55,760 --> 00:23:58,519
Because I wouldn't like to see that.
What?!
539
00:23:58,520 --> 00:24:00,959
No, it's George Harrison,
540
00:24:00,960 --> 00:24:03,879
from 1960, smoking. Look.
541
00:24:03,880 --> 00:24:06,559
Oh! Oh, Jelson!
542
00:24:06,560 --> 00:24:09,719
Oh! Thank the Lord!
Are you all right? Yeah!
543
00:24:09,720 --> 00:24:13,159
I didn't kill George Harrison!
SHE LAUGHS
544
00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:16,639
Oh. Um, do you want any more
pitchers of Long Island iced tea?
545
00:24:16,640 --> 00:24:20,039
SCATTERED CHEERS
We... Oh, actually, we...
546
00:24:20,040 --> 00:24:23,439
No, no. We can't. Um, sorry,
everyone, just a quick announcement.
547
00:24:23,440 --> 00:24:26,519
It is now, ladies and gentlemen,
time to drain your drinks
548
00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:29,399
and your bladders
and head over to Bogey's.
549
00:24:29,400 --> 00:24:30,879
CHEERING
550
00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:33,279
..for Atlas's very first
BBOTB -
551
00:24:33,280 --> 00:24:35,239
Bedford Battle of the Bands -
552
00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:38,359
where our very own
Amy Jessop will be performing!
553
00:24:38,360 --> 00:24:40,359
CHEERING
554
00:24:40,360 --> 00:24:41,999
Ugh...! Oh, God.
555
00:24:42,000 --> 00:24:43,879
Battle of the Bands! OK.
556
00:24:43,880 --> 00:24:45,919
OK. Good luck.
557
00:24:45,920 --> 00:24:48,439
Go on, then. Yeah, thanks.
558
00:24:48,440 --> 00:24:50,399
What are you doing, Mum?
You not coming in?
559
00:24:50,400 --> 00:24:52,679
No, no, I'll wait out here.
560
00:24:52,680 --> 00:24:54,639
It's a bit loud for me.
561
00:24:54,640 --> 00:24:57,439
What, here?
You're not going to be lonely?
562
00:24:57,440 --> 00:25:00,719
Oh, no, no, look, I've got
my Lonely Planet book.
563
00:25:00,720 --> 00:25:02,880
OK. All right. See you in a bit.
564
00:25:04,440 --> 00:25:06,200
Go get 'em, Amy!
565
00:25:07,240 --> 00:25:08,640
You ready? Yeah.
566
00:25:13,480 --> 00:25:16,400
Pretty good, yeah?
You don't like it?
567
00:25:20,440 --> 00:25:22,679
Give it up for, um, Cold Sick.
568
00:25:22,680 --> 00:25:25,079
Sickos! Yeah, Cold Sick!
569
00:25:25,080 --> 00:25:26,679
Decent, lads, decent!
570
00:25:26,680 --> 00:25:30,279
Next up, we have The G Hypothesis.
571
00:25:30,280 --> 00:25:34,039
CHEERING
572
00:25:34,040 --> 00:25:35,280
Good luck!
573
00:25:36,560 --> 00:25:39,279
What? How come you're here?
Well, I'm not dead, Sam!
574
00:25:39,280 --> 00:25:41,879
I'm just not going out with Amy
anymore. Oh, yeah. Of course, sorry.
575
00:25:41,880 --> 00:25:44,039
And I put up with
a lot of terrible rehearsals,
576
00:25:44,040 --> 00:25:47,399
so I'd like to see the end product.
And, you know, I missed you guys,
577
00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:49,399
so... Nice. Sorry.
578
00:25:49,400 --> 00:25:51,879
My God. I mean, look at that. Yeah.
579
00:25:51,880 --> 00:25:55,879
I cannot believe she's
still squatting. Mm.
580
00:25:55,880 --> 00:25:58,719
You know, if that's what it takes to
stay looking young,
581
00:25:58,720 --> 00:26:01,840
then you can shove it up your core.
582
00:26:03,720 --> 00:26:06,479
Yeah, look, I'm sorry
if I make you feel old, Rache.
583
00:26:06,480 --> 00:26:08,159
Older.
584
00:26:08,160 --> 00:26:11,079
With my hot-bot and my Horlicks.
585
00:26:11,080 --> 00:26:12,919
Of course you don't...
Is that Horlicks?
586
00:26:12,920 --> 00:26:14,719
Didn't realise you were
drinking Horlicks.
587
00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:17,079
Yeah, I needed to settle my tummy.
OK.
588
00:26:17,080 --> 00:26:20,639
At least I'm not actually
incontinent. Yeah. Yet. Ha.
589
00:26:20,640 --> 00:26:22,040
I will be. Ha!
590
00:26:24,680 --> 00:26:27,879
I'm not scared of getting old. Mm.
591
00:26:27,880 --> 00:26:30,560
As long as I get to do it with you.
Hm.
592
00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:37,799
Ah! My back. Are you all right?
Yeah. Not really.
593
00:26:37,800 --> 00:26:39,879
We'll have a bath. Yeah.
We'll have a bath later. Stop it.
594
00:26:39,880 --> 00:26:42,879
MICROPHONE FEEDS BACK
OK, Bedford, let me hear it!
595
00:26:42,880 --> 00:26:44,839
SCATTERED CHEERS
596
00:26:44,840 --> 00:26:47,159
My name's G. This is Amy.
597
00:26:47,160 --> 00:26:49,959
Welcome to The G hypothesis.
598
00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:51,799
One, two... Sorry.
599
00:26:51,800 --> 00:26:54,279
One sec. Um... What are you doing?
No, it's...
600
00:26:54,280 --> 00:26:56,719
I just have to...
I'll be back. I'll be back.
601
00:26:56,720 --> 00:26:58,319
Unprofessional! Where's she going?
602
00:26:58,320 --> 00:27:00,239
She'll be right back.
Sorry about this.
603
00:27:00,240 --> 00:27:02,639
She just doing a...doing a slash or
something?
604
00:27:02,640 --> 00:27:04,799
Where are you going?
605
00:27:04,800 --> 00:27:06,000
Amy!
606
00:27:12,720 --> 00:27:14,799
Oh... Oh!
607
00:27:14,800 --> 00:27:17,319
Here she is! Oh, yes, please!
608
00:27:17,320 --> 00:27:19,799
Where have you been?
Front and centre.
609
00:27:19,800 --> 00:27:22,839
Oh, for God's sake.
Sorry. I just wanted to, um...
610
00:27:22,840 --> 00:27:24,799
This is my granny, everyone.
CHEERING
611
00:27:24,800 --> 00:27:26,439
She's the coolest person I know,
612
00:27:26,440 --> 00:27:29,079
and she's met the Beatles and...
Beatles! Thomas the Tank!
613
00:27:29,080 --> 00:27:30,559
She has! Killed one of them.
614
00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:34,079
Yeah, I just...I really wanted
her to be here for this.
615
00:27:34,080 --> 00:27:36,639
Amy, I love you. Aw!
616
00:27:36,640 --> 00:27:38,119
And you, Graham.
617
00:27:38,120 --> 00:27:40,319
It's G! It's G now.
618
00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:42,719
Oh. Hey, Maya.
619
00:27:42,720 --> 00:27:44,119
Thanks for coming.
620
00:27:44,120 --> 00:27:48,959
Aw! Oh! Aw! Maya! Oh, I didn't know
you were going to be here.
621
00:27:48,960 --> 00:27:51,519
Oh, lovely!
All right, let's hurry up. Come on.
622
00:27:51,520 --> 00:27:55,359
OK, here we go. One, two,
a one, two, three, four!
623
00:27:55,360 --> 00:27:58,999
# Running in the
city of empty smiles... #
624
00:27:59,000 --> 00:28:00,480
Yeah!
625
00:28:02,560 --> 00:28:07,000
# A tear upon the face
of a robot child
626
00:28:08,400 --> 00:28:12,720
# An emoji in the place of
a mother's smile
627
00:28:14,320 --> 00:28:16,879
# Can't you look beyond your screen
628
00:28:16,880 --> 00:28:19,079
# For a little while?
629
00:28:19,080 --> 00:28:20,919
# Oh-oh-oh
630
00:28:20,920 --> 00:28:25,800
# Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ah. #
631
00:28:25,850 --> 00:28:30,400
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