Original subtitles

Jesus, you mind?

Oh, shit, man, what is your problem?

Oh, it's the whole "what happened last week" thing?

All right. Would you just back up

a little bit? Thank you.

You're both going to nursery school,

but you can't ever be in the same room at the same time,

and you're both named Amy now.

Are you fucking my sister?

Debbie and I are friends.

Carl thinks if two women are friends, they must be gay.

No, I think Debbie's gay because she follows you

around like a little puppy dog.

I'm not getting total gay vibes,

but it's inconclusive,

so... I'd say yeah,

she'll probably eventually end up gay.

I think we should break up.

Why, 'cause you love my sister?

No, because you're too clingy.

Call me

when you're not so needy.

I'm pregnant.

Are you sure it's mine?

Yeah, I'm sure it's yours.

The last thing I need in my life

is a man telling me what to do.

I really don't give a shit about what you think,

but I do understand

that you might have some feelings about this.

If you decide to have this baby,

I want to make damn sure it has a father.

I own this house!

The title is in my name!

I'm not letting you live here,

not with Liam and not with Franny.

Fuck you!

Lip kicked you out of the house?

Yeah, you believe that motherfucker?

I'm carrying my shit around in garbage bags.

You're a bad drunk.

When you drink, you get mean.

A good drunk is fun.

A bad drunk wants to have a fight.

If you really love her,

and you really are her friend,

you won't let her stay with you.

She needs to hit rock bottom.

♪ Think of all the luck you got ♪

♪ Know that it's not for naught ♪

♪ You were beaming once before ♪

♪ But it's not like that anymore ♪

♪ What is this downside ♪

♪ That you speak of? ♪

♪ What is this feeling ♪

♪ You're so sure of? ♪

♪ Round up the friends you got ♪

♪ Know that they're not for naught ♪

♪ You were willing once before ♪

♪ But it's not like that anymore ♪

♪ What is this downside ♪

♪ That you speak of? ♪

♪ What is this feeling ♪

♪ You're so sure of? ♪

What the fuck were you doing

in there? You crazy?

I was just... I just... calm...

Get the hell out of here!

You trying to get yourself killed?

Are you all right, man?

Yeah.

Are you sure?

You went down hard.

Joey, you better call an ambulance.

No, no. No...

No ambulance. I'm fine.

Are you sure, buddy?

Yeah.

I'm right as rain.

Okay.

I'm...

I'm... I'm fine.

I just bruised myself.

Hey. How was work?

Long. Franny asleep?

Yeah, I didn't hear a peep all night.

She's up now.

Fuck off, Debbie.

Carl, it's Fiona.

Come on, I got to pee.

Carl!

What was that about?

Kelly broke up with him.

How much longer, babe?

I think my calf is starting to cramp.

30 more seconds.

30 seconds, and then

we can make sweet, sweet love

for hours and hours, days, even.

I am. I am getting a cramp.

Two weeks!

Two weeks, baby,

without your wonderfulness.

Just a few more seconds.

When the vasectomy doctor said

you had to wait two weeks,

I don't think he literally meant

- you had to wait for... - Five, four... here we go.

Two. One.

Oh...

Okay.

Take it a little easier.

- Feels so good. - Uh, I know,

but we don't want

to break the bed,

or me.

Oh.

Kev?

Did you just...

Mm-hmm.

Okay, then.

Coffee?

Almost.

How you feeling?

A little rough around the edges in the morning.

- You know? - Sure.

How's Xan?

Uh, I might get to see her in a couple days.

Foster family signed off, but I need DCFS approval.

Wanna catch a meeting this morning?

Yeah, thanks.

Here.

Thanks.

What happened to your face?

Fryer at work.

Don't pick.

God, you'll make scars.

Urlacher over Butkus? No, not a chance.

Butkus was an animal.

Eight pro bowls.

Hall of Fame.

Have you checked out Butkus on YouTube?

Pre-concussion rules?

He would've kicked Khalil Mack's ass

if they'd played together. That's a fact.

Okay.

See you outside in five.

Kelly. We're going

back-to-school shopping

for guns and ammunition

and things.

Didn't you just get back home

from working all night?

Don't feel sleepy. I'll catch it up later.

Urlacher over Butkus. Can you believe that shit?

Uh, Franny?

Taking her with.

I got to go.

Lip Gallagher around?

Uh, yeah, he's inside.

Hey, watch your step.

There's a homeless guy

passed out on the sidewalk.

He... a little help?

Frank?

I think I broke something.

Something bad?

Leg.

Uh, you want to call 911?

No.

Help me inside.

What's Frank doing out here?

Uh, he says he broke his leg or something.

Won't let me call 911.

Hey.

Hey.

Hi.

Carl.

Is that blood?

It's just a scratch.

That's bone.

Help me inside.

For fuck's sake. Someone grab his arms.

I'll grab his good leg.

Come on.

Easy, easy, y. Will you fucking...

will you fucking... ow.

Oh, God.

Hello!

Is Lip around?

Uh, I think he might...

Um...

Uh, hi,

Mr. Tamietti.

You and I need to talk, son.

Oh, yeah?

Tami's having this baby,

and I need to know what your plan is.

Uh, she's... she's keeping the baby?

I mean, she seemed undecided

- the last that we, uh... - Oh, yeah.

She's keeping the baby. That's not open

for discussion.

No, no, sir. I just mean, um,

last time we talked, she... she seemed unclear

about what she wanted to do.

Oh, it's clear. She's having the baby.

Good God. Almost there.

- A little help here! - Okay, okay, okay.

Put me down. Put me down, no more.

Down there! Down there!

Jesus.

What happened?

He busted his leg.

Is that bone?

What the fuck? Why didn't you

call an ambulance?

He wouldn't let us.

The hell is that?

Mollies...

- A few personal items. - ...And acid.

Is that why you didn't want

to call an ambulance?

Uh, who the hell is that?

Our dad.

Why doesn't he want an ambulance?

Because the paramedics

would've emptied his pockets,

found the drugs, and called the cops.

Uh, you know, Mr. Tamietti, why don't we go get

a cup of coffee or something, yeah?

I had an opportunity to invest

some of my Ingrid severance money, and I took it.

If you're done hiding your stash,

can I call 911?

Not until my associates come

and we complete our transaction.

I got to go to work.

Yeah, we should go, too.

I'll give your associates

five minutes.

Then I'm calling 911.

Borrow your phone?

- Mail. - Ah, I'm late for...

work.

Ah, crap.

I forgot the stroller.

Take her.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Move.

Frank again?

Yeah.

Open femur fracture.

Definitely going to need surgery.

I'm in a lot of pain here. Could I get 15 of morphine?

No can do, Frank.

Lidoc...

is that lidocaine?

Yep.

Ah, come on, guys!

You got any fentanyl in there?

That'd take the edge off.

Can give you a bite block

to chomp down on if you like.

A bite block?

What are you, the Marquis de Sade?

Best I can do after last time.

I did not steal drugs from your ambulance.

I saw you take it, Frank.

Are you sure you don't want that bite block?

This might sting.

Fuck you, Quincy.

Personally, I would've taken the bite block.

You want to ride with him again?

How long's the wait at County this morning?

Pro hockey season's shorter.

- Ow! Ow! Ow! Ouch! - Okay.

Let me get my purse and tell my brother we're leaving.

Easy, easy, easy, e...

Keep whining, Frank,

and I'll find every pothole

between here and County

to bounce you over.

Hey, Liam?

I got to take Frank to the ER,

so you have to make yourself breakfast, okay?

Hey.

Liam?

You want Tabasco?

Eight seconds.

It's only been two weeks since the surgery, babe.

Give it some time.

12-year-olds last longer.

All right, girls, finish up. It's almost time for school.

Is this what it's gonna be like from now on?

Eight seconds?

You really think we need to be having

this conversation in front of the girls?

Wham, bam, thank you, ma'am. That's me now.

Mr. Kevin Ball, the "wham, bam" man.

Okay, girls. Dishes in the sink

and backpacks. Let's go.

I'm so sorry I let them cut you guys.

Can you ever forgive me?

You're gonna live, baby.

It's one tiny incision.

Wait for Mommy.

Oh, God.

Your sister coming again this morning?

She said she was, yeah.

Tami's dad showed up at my house this morning.

- Bob? - Yeah.

Shit. What did he want?

Wants to know my plan.

You have a plan?

No.

Tami's made it very clear

that I'm not allowed to have one.

Don't fuck with Bob.

He's tougher than he looks.

He said Tami's definitely having the baby.

That's the Tamiettis.

Old-school Catholics.

Big families and fish on Fridays.

She tell you she was going to see a doctor today?

No.

This afternoon.

Asked Cami to go, but she's working until 6:00.

W-what kind of doctor? Did she say?

Nope.

Tami likes to stick it to her dad.

Could be she's getting ready to solve your problem.

It's starting.

Yeah.

All right. Coke,

crackers, and a bedpan.

Barb's saying three hours, but could be five.

I can't stay the whole time. I got a meeting.

Oh, Christ. AA?

Did you let Lip recruit you into that cult?

Meeting with a public defender.

Trouble with the law? Excuse me.

I've got a bone sticking out of my thigh.

Does this look like a scam to you?

Hey, doc.

Could you hook a brother up with a little morphine

for a broken femur?

Come on, I...

Ah, that's right. Just walk on by, Osama.

We'll have your ass on that plane

and back to Crap-sanistan

as soon as the president revokes your H-1B visa.

More bees with honey, Frank.

This is nothing but torture

and payback.

You signed a Hippocratic Oath,

for fuck's sake.

Doctors have been convicted

of war crimes

for what you're doing to me.

How did this happen, anyway?

I was taking a brief nap

in that shithole you used to own,

and they started tearing it down around me!

My apartment building?

I woke up with a... a wrecking ball

trying to decapitate me! I had to run for my life.

I should sue the bastards.

You were drunk, trespassing,

and sleeping in a boarded-up building, okay?

I don't think a lawsuit is likely to go your way.

Never know.

They may settle

to avoid a court case.

Hey.

You got anything useful in there?

Eh, a Quaalude?

Maybe an oxy?

No.

Miss!

Excuse me.

I'm in quite a bit

of, uh, discomfort

with this open fracture.

I know the doctors are incredibly busy,

but could you ask one of them

to prescribe something for the pain?

I don't need much.

20 of morphine would be more than enough.

You're Frank, right?

Yes.

No.

Your reputation precedes you.

What the fuck is wrong with you people?

You wouldn't treat a dog in the street like this!

Mr. Gallagher?

- Yes! - Here!

Yeah.

So, Mr. Gallagher,

I see you visited our hospital in the past.

Yes, once or twice.

52 times, actually,

and you have no insurance.

Unfortunately not. Um...

Difficulty securing employment in this challenging economy.

Unemployment rate is under 4%.

We're hiring janitors without hands.

I have five different birthdates

and four different middle initials

in your records.

Are you over 65, Mr. Gallagher?

Do you need me to be?

If you're over 65, you qualify for Medicare.

Free hospitalization, drugs...

Yes, I'm over 65.

Just had a birthday. Put that down.

When were you born?

January 16th, 19...

54.

...54, exactly.

Do you have ID I can use

to verify that date of birth?

Maybe.

I found that at a Dairy Queen.

I've been meaning to return that.

It says you were born in 1936.

Makes you 83.

I try to take care of myself.

Someone will be over to examine you shortly.

I got to go soon.

- Hey, Fiona. - Hey, Debs, are you home?

- No. Why? - Liam wasn't there

when I left the house with Frank this morning,

and I locked up.

I don't know if he has his keys.

He's not answering his phone?

No. Straight to voice mail.

Can you track him down, make sure he can get in?

Yeah, sure. No problem.

Okay.

Good luck.

♪ Whoa ♪

♪ Whoa, whoa ♪

Rah!

Gah!

You need one of these?

If I get the same roommate

I had last year, yeah.

- Stinky? - Ever leave

half a burrito under the seat of your car

all summer?

I know.

Oof.

So how do you like military school?

Two hundred girls, ten bathrooms.

It's survival of the fittest.

How long have you been going there for?

Since my mom ran off with a gunnery sergeant

when I was nine.

My God. Was that hard?

♪ Nothing like this ♪

What every South Side girl needs: Kevlar.

Seriously.

Put it on.

Okay.

Whoo!

Damn!

♪ Whoa ♪

♪ You ain't seen nothing ♪

Hi, Liam. You have your keys?

Fiona locked you out of the house.

Call me back.

You ever see your mom?

On Facebook.

Took her years, but she finally let me friend her.

♪ I'm feeling alive ♪

Weird. Liam always answers his phone.

Wa. Voilà.

What do you think? Badass?

Definitely.

♪ Oh you ain't seen nothing like this ♪

♪ Oh, whoa ♪

♪ Whoa ♪

♪ You ain't seen nothing like this ♪

Damn, your phone's lighting up.

Yep.

You gonna answer it?

Nope.

Biscuits, fresh out of the oven.

You boys need anything else?

Ah, no thanks, Grandma.

How about you, Liam?

All set, Mrs. Thompson.

Okay. I'll be in the kitchen

if you change your mind.

Don't you think they might be worried?

Took them two days to realize I was gone.

Can't be too worried.

Why the long face, little pirate?

Nothing.

Come on.

You can tell your Auntie Lori.

I got to make sure my favorite first mate's head

is in the game.

Happy cooks make happy meals.

I didn't make it past the first round of cuts

for West Point,

and my lesbian sister

is in love with my girlfriend,

trying to turn her gay, too.

Wow.

World's really stomping on your dreams, huh?

When God hands you lemons,

you just got to squeeze that juice

into the wound and enjoy the pain.

Ma'am?

You're my star.

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off,

get right back up on that horse.

Horse, ma'am?

Right back into that saddle, huh?

Hello?

Anybody?

Ah, come on! I have to set myself on fire

to get some attention around here?

Please do! I'll bring the matches

if you bring the gasoline.

About damn time. How'd you do

on the back nine, doc? Even par?

How you been, Frank? Taking care of that new liver

someone was stupid enough to waste on you?

- Hm. - So, what is it

this time? You're speaking,

so I'm gonna rule out

an overdose or alcohol poisoning.

Broke an appendage.

Hurts like hell. Could you hook me up

with a healthy helping of your favorite opiate?

You haven't had anything yet?

Not a damn thing.

Your coworkers have been tighter

than a miser at a March of Dimes fundraiser

with the pain relief.

Couldn't even rustle up

a Tylenol 3 with codeine.

Ow.

That's bone.

That's what I've been saying!

Congratulations, Frank. You hit the jackpot this time.

You get a quick trip to the OR

and copious amounts of intravenous narcotics.

Hey, Maggie.

Call up to surgery and find out who's okay

with not getting paid today.

You were drunk?

Yes.

You initiated the assault?

I only punched her once.

You fractured her cheekbone.

You have a previous felony conviction?

- Yeah. - Well, it's not much

of a defense to present.

You're a convicted felon,

you were drunk, you attacked a woman

without any provocation

in front of a dozen witnesses.

No, there was provocation.

She... she called the cops on my ten-year-old brother

for selling lemonade in front of her house.

Why would she do that?

My brother's black.

You have a black brother?

Yeah.

DA may be reluctant to put that

in front of a black Chicago jury.

We might be able to plead it down

from a felony to a misdemeanor.

Will I have to do time?

Depends.

You employed?

I'm looking.

What about AA?

Yes.

Okay, I'll talk to the DA.

Thank you.

But Miss Gallagher,

the judge is gonna want to see proof that you are

a contributing member of society, so no alcohol,

and get yourself a job, any job.

Yes, ma'am.

Just a drill,

children. No need for panic.

Line up behind your teacher

in a straight line.

Straight lines,

James McPherson!

Abby Zoldan,

does that look like a straight line?

Gus Accord, stop eating sand from the sandbox

and get in line, please.

Here we go. Line up.

Go to your number.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where are you going, Amy Ball?

I have to go back in.

Can you get in line behind Sister Anne, please?

I can't.

I have to go back

in my cubby.

Why do you have to get back in your cubby?

So you don't see us.

See who?

There's two of you?

Eight seconds? Whew, that's rough.

Yeah. My cousin Ronnie

never recovered from his surgery.

Been ten years. He still has to wear

one of those adult diapers.

From a vasectomy?

No. Prostate.

What the hell does that have to do with anything?

I'm just saying. It's never a good idea

to let doctors near your man parts

with anything sharp.

I thought you guys were gonna help cheer me up.

Okay.

Okay.

Did sex still feel good?

Yeah.

Great.

It was quick, but good.

So enjoy that.

Lots of guys don't get any.

- Be happy with quick. - Yeah.

Cousin Ronnie can't get it up at all anymore

since the surgery. He has to use

one of those pump things.

Enough about Cousin Ronnie, would you,

Kermit, please?

Eight seconds with you

is like eight hours

with anyone else, baby.

Short but sweet.

Very short.

You just had the vasectomy, baby.

You'll be back to your regular

ten seconds in no time.

Oh, damn.

Oh, burn.

Oh.

Alibi.

Yes, Sister?

Yes, I understand.

Thank you.

Absolutely.

What?

The nuns know.

Hey.

How long you been waiting here like a creepy stalker?

Not long.

Bullshit. Carla saw you out here

a half-hour ago. She wanted to call the cops.

So my dad find you this morning?

Yeah, he came to my house.

Yeah? And what'd you two boys decide?

Am I having this baby or not?

He says you're keeping it.

He did, huh?

Good to know.

Oh, so you're not?

I just needed him off my ass.

- All right, then you are. - Jesus, what is it with men

trying to tell me what to do with my own body?

I'm not trying to tell you what to do.

All right? I'm just confused.

He made it sound like your decision was made.

Well, he doesn't know shit.

All right, then. Good?

So are we done?

Where are you going?

Where am I going?

Yeah.

The doctor's.

Who told you? Brad?

Yeah.

And you want to come?

Yeah, if you want me to.

I don't, or I would have asked

you to in the first place.

All right, you know, go fuck yourself, Tami.

Fuck me.

Lip. Lip!

- Lip! - What?

We're already here.

Liam?

Liam, you home?

You want a beer?

Yeah, absolutely.

Whee.

I'll be right back.

Damn, girl!

Ah.

If I'm gonna be a sailor,

I got to learn to drink like one.

A-cheers.

So what do you want to do in the Navy?

I'm gonna fly jets.

Like, off aircraft carriers and stuff?

That's the idea.

That is so cool.

What are you doing?

Gotta break them in

before school starts.

These things destroy your feet

if they're not broken in.

Come on! Join me.

Okay.

Hey, Fiona.

Hey. You get a hold of Liam?

No. I'm sure

he forgot to charge his phone again.

What are you doing?

I'm jumping up and down with Kelly.

What are you doing?

Ah, applying for jobs

I don't really want.

Well, I'm home now,

so Liam will be able

to get in when he comes.

All right. Thanks.

How you feeling, Frank?

Well, I had a rather nice buzz going there for a bit,

but it's starting to fade. Think it's time

to hit me up with the real

knock-you-on-your-ass stuff.

We've been experimenting

with Oriental medicine pain management,

so we thought we'd skip the anesthesia

and just pop a few acupuncture needles in your head,

and see how that works.

What?

I'm just fucking with you, Frank.

You shoulda seen your face.

This is Dr. Wild. He's gonna be

your surgeon today. Youngest graduate

of Yale Medical School in over 100 years.

Top of his class, too.

How old are you now, Noah? 20?

- Twenty-one. - Hmm.

Graduated high school when he was 12.

This is the first week of his ortho residency.

We were very lucky to find Dr. Wild on call today.

Nobody else was willing to do it.

Thought we were going to have to Dermabond your femur

and just dump you back out on the street.

But not to worry. Dr. Grey will be the attending.

Where is Dr. Grey?

Stuck in traffic on the Dan Ryan.

Said to get started without him.

Have you done this before?

A comminuted femur fracture?

Hell no. Very exciting.

We're a teaching hospital, Frank.

Residents working on alcoholic deadbeats

who don't pay their bills is how young surgeons learn.

Hey.

Was everything fine?

Peachy.

What kind of doctor's office was that?

There's no baby stuff around or anything.

I need a drink. Do you want to get a drink?

Right. No, I'll see you.

I'm off to the bank.

Aww, still down, little man?

Yeah, a bit.

Want a quick blowie or a handy-J to perk you up?

I was just kidding, kiddo.

Manager-employee intimacy

is a big no-no in the new employee handbook.

It's a shame, really. Sex used

to be pro forma in fast food.

Jizz and hair nets went together like mustard and mayo.

Hell of a stress relief after a big lunch rush.

I'll be back in about 20

if you can just watch the register

while I'm gone, my salty little biscuit.

Good call on the blowie.

I let Lori go down on me once.

She had most of her fist up my ass

and chewed on my dick.

Woman's an animal.

Welcome to Captain Bob's, matey.

How may I help you?

Give me the fucking money.

Is that a .32?

The fucking money, shithead!

- It's pink. - The bullets

aren't pink, motherfucker!

Give me the goddamn money!

Okay, you know what, asshole? Pull the trigger.

My life couldn't get any fucking worse.

Yeah, that's right. Pull the motherfucking trigger.

God fucking...

Fucker

piece of fucking shit!

West Point, motherfucking...

Lesbian sister piece of shit!

Hi.

I saw the "Help Wanted" sign.

It's minimum wage, nights.

Is there an application or something I can fill out?

$11.99.

- All right, thanks. - You still here?

I need a job.

Thanks.

Just to be clear, have you been sending

two children to our school

for the price of one for months?

We're very sorry, Sister.

You only had space for one girl, so...

So you committed fraud

and conspired to deny

the Sisters of Faith, Hope, and Charity

the revenue we send to our sister order in Ghana

to help fight leprosy.

Leprosy? Really?

That's bad. That's when your skin

- falls off... - I got it, Kev.

We're very sorry, Sister.

After much prayer, we've come up

with two possible ways

for us to resolve this sad situation.

$1,400?

Your back tuition, plus interest.

By Friday, or we call the cops.

And what's the other possible way?

We need a Jesus for the Festival

of St. Felicity pageant next weekend,

and Mr. Ball looks like he works out.

You want Kev to be Jesus?

That's it?

There is one small catch.

Whoa.

That's huge.

And heavy.

Mr. Polinsky made it himself.

He paid for a pew, so we've been afraid

to tell him no one can lift it.

So I got to get nailed up or it or something?

No. Carry it on your shoulder,

as Christ did on his way to Golgotha.

Our last Jesus got a hernia.

Uh, yeah.

So how far do I got to carry it?

From the school to the church.

That's got to be a hundred yards.

More like 150.

$1,400, Kev.

Fuck this.

I went to get a test done.

The doctor was my mom's oncologist.

Cancer.

BRCA.

It's a gene, moron.

I went to find out if I inherited

a genetic mutation from my mom

that means I'm probably gonna die of breast cancer.

Little gene might even throw in ovarian cancer, free of charge,

just to make sure I'm good and dead.

And?

Don't find out the results for a couple days.

Oh...

I'm sorry.

Yeah, it's a tough break for me, huh?

Want to know the real pisser?

There are two variations of the gene.

If I have one,

having babies reduces my chances of getting cancer,

but if I have the other...

...Then having a baby increases my chances

of getting cancer. Cami got the test

a couple years ago, and she's got

the "baby good" kind of death gene,

so she got your buddy Brad to knock her up right away,

and Cory took the test, and Daddy's little princess

is, of course,

clean as driven snow.

And you've never been tested before.

Fuck no. Why would I want to know

if I'm gonna live or die?

Can the doctors do anything if you have the gene?

You know what? Let's eat.

I am fucking famished.

Hi.

My name is Fiona, and, uh,

I'm not sure if I'm an alcoholic.

Hi, Fiona.

I know I'm supposed to say I'm an alcoholic,

but I... I don't really know.

I have been going through a really rough time

the last couple months,

and I've been drinking too much to get by...

...But I haven't had trouble with alcohol before.

There's a lot of reasons to think

that I could be an alcoholic.

My mom was a junkie,

and my dad's a drunk and an addict.

My brother's an alcoholic,

and I love him to death.

So I guess I should be here,

you know, just in case.

Thanks for listening.

You're welcome.

Hi, my name is Tony, and I'm an alcoholic.

Fuck.

Oh, holy shit!

What are you doing?

I'm sorry.

I'm not gay.

No, I know. That was a mistake.

I'm... I am... I mean, I wish I was,

because if I were, I would...

I would totally be into you. You're great.

Yeah, no. Thanks.

Oh, shit.

I totally led you on. I am...

I'm so sorry. We... we can still be friends.

Yeah, absolutely.

I should probably get going and let you sleep,

'cause you worked last night, right?

Yeah, I did.

You should.

I'll call you later, okay?

Shit. That thing looks

like it weighs at least 300 pounds.

How far are you supposed to drag it?

From the school playground to the church.

You can't put wheels on the end of it or something?

The nuns said no.

Jesus didn't have wheels.

Oh. Here's the wig.

Jesus was a blond?

No, Jesus was black

and had nappy hair, but no one

ever wants to talk about that.

Jesus wasn't black.

African. Hello.

- Fuck off. - You fuck off.

Jesus was a Jew.

Jesus was Jewish?

King of the Jews.

King of the Jews!

Yeah, at first, maybe,

but then he was Christian,

because he was...

well, because he was Christ,

so he was the first Christ-ian.

How do I look?

You want the truth?

Hey, if you're looking to build

your post-vasectomy stamina,

lugging that fucker around oughta do it.

Kevin?

The hell is that?

I think it's your pants.

Hey.

I'm glad to see you here.

Hi.

Hi.

Thanks.

Uh, how's, uh, life at Patsy's?

Eh, same old shit.

Lily ran off with her boyfriend to Portland,

oh, and Juan... he got picked up by ICE

when he showed up at court for a DUI.

Shit. Well, he's got a family, right?

Yeah. Couple of kids.

Oh, I wouldn't.

Coffee at this meeting is shit.

You might want to check out Al-Anon

if you're not sure about AA.

Couple of us go to both.

It's for people who have family members who are drunks.

There's a flyer over there

with the rest of the literature.

I'll check it out.

Keep coming.

It works.

Hey.

How you feeling?

Boy, it was a mess in there.

Took six plates and 18 screws,

but I think we got Humpty Dumpty

put back together again.

Pain.

To be expected,

but pain is your friend, okay?

It's the body's way of letting you know

it needs time to rest and to heal.

Drugs.

Drugs.

Yeah.

How'd it go?

Uh, great.

It was a distal intra-articular fracture.

Uh, extended up into the femoral shaft.

Difficult separating the lateral...

Yeah, that's wonderful.

When can we boot his ass out?

Discharge him from the hospital?

Tonight, perhaps?

Admin is refusing him a bed.

Drugs!

In the past 15 years,

Mr. Gallagher has run up

over $85,000

in unpaid bills at this hospital alone,

not to mention another $32,000

in outpatient services.

But he's facing three to six months

of recovery. Rehab, physical therapy...

So we're agreed. Tonight, then?

He's still too weak.

I need drugs!

More drugs!

He seems to be regaining

his strength.

Just pump him full of IV antibiotics

and schedule a follow-up. Send him home

with 20 Oxy. He'll be happy as a clam.

Not to worry, doctor.

Only two things will be left roaming the Earth

after the next apocalypse:

cockroaches and Frank Gallagher.

Pain. I'm feeling pain.

Hey.

Hi.

That dinner?

Yeah.

Wasn't much in there.

A baby?

Maybe.

Wanna talk about it?

No.

Not really.

Sorry I missed the meeting this morning.

I got stuck taking Frank to the hospital.

You got to a meeting today, though?

I did, over at the rec center.

Good.

What's that?

It's a Al-Anon flyer.

It's... I picked it up at the meeting.

Twenty questions to see if Al-Anon

could be right for you.

Yeah, how'd you do?

Perfect score. Twenty out of 20.

"Have holidays or gatherings

ever been spoiled by a loved one's drinking?"

Yeah.

"Have you ever called the police

for fear of abuse?"

The best ones are at the bottom.

"Do you feel more alive in the midst of a crisis?"

Mm-hmm.

"Are you uneasy when your life

is going smoothly?" Mm-hmm.

And my personal favorite:

"Do you care for others easily,

but find it difficult to care for yourself?"

You might need to start going to two groups a day now.

Yeah. It's fucked up.

I was doing so well for a while.

I really thought I had a chance.

You do have a chance.

I don't know if I believe that anymore.

I don't know what happened.

It just all fell apart so fast.

I don't really know what I'm supposed to do now.

Only thing you can do.

You get back up.

You start over.

It's that easy, huh?

No, it's fucking hard,

but you're strong.

Are you sure?

Yeah.

I'm sure.

All right. Shit.

I got to go work.

Yeah, you got a new job?

Yeah.

Nights at the Valero.

Ho, ho! Starting from the top, huh?

Hey, um, did you ever find Liam today?

No, but Debbie was here

most of the day. She might have.

All right.

♪ Don't mean I'm gonna let go ♪

♪ Not gonna lay down die here ♪

♪ There's blood still running ♪

One of your sisters again?

Nope. Brother.

- Is that Chris Rock? - No.

Look, that lady's about to shoot that dude in the head.

I'm going up now, Todd. You boys don't forget

to brush your teeth and say your prayers.

Yes, ma'am. We won't.

Your services are no longer needed...

Look.

- Oh! - Oh, damn.

Keep this closed and don't open it for anyone.

One inch thick. Can stop a shotgun

at point-blank range.

Does it need to?

Hasn't happened in a couple years.

If you have to pee, wait till no one's in the store,

come out, lock the front, and then do your business.

No lunch break, but owner doesn't mind

if you eat a burrito

or whatever.

You got it?

Yeah, I think so.

Darian comes in at 6:00.

He's late sometimes, but he'll show.

♪ I'm taking my time before this life ends ♪

♪ I've been giving everything ♪

♪ I'm taking my time ♪

♪ Before this life ends ♪

♪ I've been giving everything I love ♪

♪ It's so good ♪

Hey. The fuck's wrong with you?

Leave me alone, Carl.

♪ Silly self-made man ♪

♪ Got 18 castles in the sand ♪

♪ Without a love it's no good ♪

♪ It's no good ♪

She doesn't love me.

Who?

Kelly.

I tried to kiss her, and she...

Why can't anyone ever love me?

Come on. That's not true.

It is.

Franny loves you.

That doesn't fucking count.

Someone shot at me today.

What?

Yeah, at work.

I fucked him up.

The cops come?

Yeah. Said I did a good job,

but probably should've just given him the money.

It was only, like, 120 bucks.

No shit. You don't want

to take a bullet for Captain Bob.

Guess I just kind of went crazy on the dude

after Kelly broke up with me,

and getting that rejection letter from West Point.

You got a letter from West Point?

Yeah.

Didn't even make it past the first cut.

♪ My moves are a never-ending smile ♪

Sorry.

Yeah.

Me, too.

You know you'll find somebody.

You think so?

Yeah, definitely.

Kelly's a bitch. She likes to break hearts.

She is a bitch.

Yeah, we should go fuck her up.

She'd kick both our asses.

I'm glad you didn't get shot.

Yeah, me too.

Is that Jesus?

Here you go.

Thanks.

Fiona?

Holy fuck.

Hi, Max.

$8.52.

How've you been?

I've been better.

Yeah.

Uh, listen, I was meaning to call you.

The zoning on that lot you're a partner in got approved.

Looks like the nursing home's still gonna purchase it.

You know, we still have some due diligence to do,

but should close the next six, maybe 12 months.

And can I get 50 bucks on six?

Uh...

I don't remember exactly how much

you have in the partnership.

Something around $90,000?

S... $100,000.

What if I bought you out now?

- What? - Yeah.

That way, you don't have to wait a year

for your money, and I don't have

to waste my time hunting down your next of kin

after you get shot selling cheap wine out of this box.

Still have the same phone number?

Yeah.

Good.

I'll call you in the morning. We'll get it done.

♪ I wake up ♪

♪ Waiting for you ♪

♪ I try ♪

- Got it? - Yup, I got this one.

Let's go.

Hello?

Hello!

Fuck.

♪ Wake up waiting for you ♪

♪ I try hard ♪

♪ To start anew ♪