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1
00:00:03,551 --> 00:00:05,343
It's-it's you again.
2
00:00:05,426 --> 00:00:07,510
Okay, here's-here's what...
Here's what happened.
3
00:00:07,593 --> 00:00:09,510
Carrie put on this brown wig
4
00:00:09,593 --> 00:00:11,301
and was running out
into traffic,
5
00:00:11,385 --> 00:00:14,468
and the guy I thought
was the bad guy isn't,
6
00:00:14,551 --> 00:00:16,843
and her boyfriend
is the suicide bomber.
7
00:00:16,927 --> 00:00:19,093
You believe that shit?
8
00:00:19,176 --> 00:00:21,301
- Wrong show, Frank.
- What?
9
00:00:21,385 --> 00:00:23,301
That's Homeland, not Shameless.
10
00:00:25,510 --> 00:00:26,718
Fuck.
11
00:00:26,802 --> 00:00:28,885
Wow.
12
00:00:28,968 --> 00:00:30,760
Don't mix Percocet with beer.
13
00:00:32,843 --> 00:00:34,760
- Who's the new barback?
- That's Santiago.
14
00:00:34,843 --> 00:00:36,643
He's staying with us
until we find his father.
15
00:00:36,677 --> 00:00:38,718
They were gonna go live
with his uncle in Indiana.
16
00:00:38,802 --> 00:00:41,093
How are we gonna find
some random Guatemalan guy
17
00:00:41,176 --> 00:00:42,551
in Gary, Indiana?
18
00:00:42,635 --> 00:00:44,134
"Where to find
19
00:00:44,218 --> 00:00:46,176
illegal immigrants,
Gary, Indiana."
20
00:00:46,259 --> 00:00:47,843
Got a whole list of places.
21
00:00:47,927 --> 00:00:49,301
You find Santiago's uncle?
22
00:00:49,385 --> 00:00:51,426
Yeah. Found him
and then lost him.
23
00:00:51,510 --> 00:00:52,968
Fly, my Mexican friend!
24
00:00:53,051 --> 00:00:55,718
- Guatemalan.
- Guatemalan friend!
25
00:00:55,802 --> 00:00:57,301
Fly!
26
00:00:57,385 --> 00:00:59,760
Liam, your share
of the bills this month $70.
27
00:00:59,843 --> 00:01:01,843
- I'm nine.
- Figure it out.
28
00:01:01,927 --> 00:01:04,635
Carl, your share of the bill
this month is 70 bucks.
29
00:01:04,718 --> 00:01:06,301
Maybe you should get a real job
30
00:01:06,385 --> 00:01:07,736
and stop hanging out
with your girlfriend so much.
31
00:01:07,760 --> 00:01:09,385
Ingrid and I are pregnant.
32
00:01:09,468 --> 00:01:11,009
- Triplets?
- Sextuplets.
33
00:01:11,093 --> 00:01:12,927
And we're hiding
from a North Korean
34
00:01:13,009 --> 00:01:15,343
fertility specialist,
so make room.
35
00:01:15,426 --> 00:01:16,635
We are moving in.
36
00:01:16,718 --> 00:01:18,301
That's hysterical.
37
00:01:18,385 --> 00:01:20,027
Do you really think
we can afford more than one?
38
00:01:20,051 --> 00:01:21,218
You'll get a job.
39
00:01:23,218 --> 00:01:24,927
"Dreams dead? You're our man.
40
00:01:25,009 --> 00:01:26,968
Be the Hobo Loco Man."
Kev, what is this?
41
00:01:27,051 --> 00:01:28,551
They're holding a competition
42
00:01:28,635 --> 00:01:31,968
to choose the Hobo Loco
spokesperson.
43
00:01:32,051 --> 00:01:34,510
The winner gets
a $50,000 contract
44
00:01:34,593 --> 00:01:37,635
to be in a social media
campaign.
45
00:01:37,718 --> 00:01:39,343
This is me.
46
00:01:39,426 --> 00:01:41,385
I'm the Hobo Loco Man.
47
00:01:41,468 --> 00:01:43,385
You smell like a barroom floor.
48
00:01:45,051 --> 00:01:47,968
I don't need anything from you!
49
00:01:48,051 --> 00:01:49,093
She do this a lot?
50
00:01:49,176 --> 00:01:50,385
Yeah.
51
00:01:50,468 --> 00:01:52,218
Well, lately.
52
00:04:05,051 --> 00:04:06,802
Shit.
53
00:04:06,885 --> 00:04:08,093
You open?
54
00:04:10,885 --> 00:04:12,885
Twenty-four hours.
55
00:04:14,551 --> 00:04:15,843
You sit wherever you want.
56
00:04:24,176 --> 00:04:26,134
I'll bring menus to you.
57
00:04:26,218 --> 00:04:27,385
Are you hiring?
58
00:04:28,635 --> 00:04:29,677
What?
59
00:04:29,760 --> 00:04:30,760
I'm a hard worker.
60
00:04:34,009 --> 00:04:35,468
How about this booth
right over here?
61
00:04:44,176 --> 00:04:46,134
Got any more
where this came from?
62
00:04:48,593 --> 00:04:52,176
Couple hours after last call,
but get you some coffee.
63
00:04:52,259 --> 00:04:54,385
So you're just drinking
on the job, then?
64
00:04:55,677 --> 00:04:58,051
Everything okay out here, Fiona?
65
00:05:07,385 --> 00:05:09,093
Let's get out of here.
66
00:05:23,426 --> 00:05:24,510
Shit.
67
00:05:28,176 --> 00:05:30,176
Shit. Shit.
68
00:05:30,259 --> 00:05:31,802
Shit.
69
00:05:31,885 --> 00:05:32,885
You all right?
70
00:05:35,134 --> 00:05:36,343
Yeah.
71
00:05:38,218 --> 00:05:39,593
Good.
72
00:05:58,134 --> 00:05:59,843
Nothing but junk mail.
73
00:06:01,677 --> 00:06:03,677
Rat shit in the attic.
74
00:06:03,760 --> 00:06:05,176
Fires in the dryer vent.
75
00:06:05,259 --> 00:06:07,051
These ads are terrifying.
76
00:06:07,134 --> 00:06:09,259
Carbon monoxide leaks
from the furnace?
77
00:06:09,343 --> 00:06:10,885
Fiona always handled this shit.
78
00:06:10,968 --> 00:06:12,843
Should I be worried
about these things?
79
00:06:12,927 --> 00:06:15,176
Homeowner stuff.
80
00:06:15,259 --> 00:06:17,385
Sucks to be an adult.
81
00:06:25,051 --> 00:06:27,635
What? I'm eating for seven now.
82
00:06:27,718 --> 00:06:29,358
Well, then all seven of you
are gonna need
83
00:06:29,385 --> 00:06:31,265
to cough up cash
if you're gonna be living here.
84
00:06:31,343 --> 00:06:32,510
All right.
85
00:06:32,593 --> 00:06:33,913
I'm gonna do
some therapy sessions
86
00:06:33,968 --> 00:06:35,426
on the phone this afternoon.
87
00:06:35,510 --> 00:06:37,343
I'll write you a check later.
88
00:06:39,259 --> 00:06:40,802
Hey. Where you guys going?
89
00:06:40,885 --> 00:06:42,551
Softball camp.
90
00:06:42,635 --> 00:06:45,259
I got a call from one of those
20 jobs I applied for.
91
00:06:45,343 --> 00:06:46,885
Nice. Which one?
92
00:06:46,968 --> 00:06:48,426
Some seafood restaurant place.
93
00:06:48,510 --> 00:06:50,968
Carl Gallagher's going legit.
94
00:06:51,051 --> 00:06:52,259
Minimum wage?
95
00:06:52,343 --> 00:06:53,968
Only job someone like me
can get.
96
00:06:54,051 --> 00:06:55,611
You know, you really
can't put "drug dealer"
97
00:06:55,635 --> 00:06:57,134
or "gunrunner"
on your West Point app.
98
00:06:57,218 --> 00:06:59,301
Come on, babe.
99
00:06:59,385 --> 00:07:00,677
Can we call the plumber guy?
100
00:07:00,760 --> 00:07:03,134
Says he can snake our tub
for ten bucks.
101
00:07:03,218 --> 00:07:04,510
What's wrong with our tub?
102
00:07:04,593 --> 00:07:06,176
It has two inches
of scummy water in it
103
00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:08,051
all the time that doesn't drain.
104
00:07:08,134 --> 00:07:09,802
Good morning, family one.
105
00:07:09,885 --> 00:07:11,551
Family two.
106
00:07:11,635 --> 00:07:13,176
Why do you look
like a farm animal?
107
00:07:13,259 --> 00:07:14,593
Smell like one too.
108
00:07:14,677 --> 00:07:17,510
Your father is gonna be
the new Hobo Loco
109
00:07:17,593 --> 00:07:19,677
beverage spokesperson.
110
00:07:19,760 --> 00:07:22,551
Now, I haven't won
the competition yet, Ingy.
111
00:07:23,009 --> 00:07:24,760
Hobo what-o?
112
00:07:24,843 --> 00:07:27,093
It's a delicious
alcoholic beverage.
113
00:07:27,176 --> 00:07:28,677
They're looking for someone
114
00:07:28,760 --> 00:07:30,259
with no purpose in life.
115
00:07:30,343 --> 00:07:32,593
I finally found my calling.
116
00:07:32,677 --> 00:07:36,218
Soon I'll be able
to support those I love.
117
00:07:36,968 --> 00:07:38,301
Yeah.
118
00:07:41,677 --> 00:07:43,259
Wish me luck.
119
00:07:43,343 --> 00:07:47,134
You go get 'em,
my Hobo Loco tiger.
120
00:07:47,218 --> 00:07:49,677
Good-bye, little Frank-ettes.
121
00:07:55,843 --> 00:07:57,760
No need to even hold
a competition.
122
00:07:57,843 --> 00:07:59,259
If it involves alcohol,
123
00:07:59,343 --> 00:08:00,760
they should just
give him the prize.
124
00:08:02,218 --> 00:08:04,677
Think we need to worry
about termites?
125
00:08:09,426 --> 00:08:11,051
The hell's going on?
126
00:08:11,134 --> 00:08:12,885
Jesus, it's almost 730.
127
00:08:12,968 --> 00:08:14,635
Place is closed.
128
00:08:14,718 --> 00:08:16,593
W-well, where's Fiona?
129
00:08:16,677 --> 00:08:18,468
We already turned away
a bunch of customers.
130
00:08:18,551 --> 00:08:19,885
Well, let's get set up fast
131
00:08:19,968 --> 00:08:21,677
so we don't lose
any more business.
132
00:08:22,677 --> 00:08:23,819
Okay, let's get
the coffee going.
133
00:08:23,843 --> 00:08:25,218
Fire up the grills.
134
00:08:25,301 --> 00:08:26,134
Make sure the ketchups
are married.
135
00:08:26,218 --> 00:08:27,343
I'll get the blinds.
136
00:08:29,218 --> 00:08:30,235
All right, set the tables.
137
00:08:30,259 --> 00:08:31,718
Let's go, guys. Come on.
138
00:08:37,093 --> 00:08:38,718
Hey, Eliza.
139
00:08:42,009 --> 00:08:43,927
She alive?
140
00:08:44,009 --> 00:08:45,593
Yo, wakey-wakey!
141
00:08:45,677 --> 00:08:47,110
- Get the fuck away from me!
- Whoa, whoa!
142
00:08:47,134 --> 00:08:48,176
Take it easy!
143
00:08:48,259 --> 00:08:50,176
Shit.
144
00:08:50,259 --> 00:08:51,635
Sorry.
145
00:08:51,718 --> 00:08:53,259
You okay?
146
00:08:53,343 --> 00:08:55,802
Yeah. What time is it?
147
00:08:55,885 --> 00:08:57,551
Why was this place locked?
148
00:09:02,301 --> 00:09:04,843
I was doing the cash out late,
149
00:09:04,927 --> 00:09:06,718
and I, went into the back office
150
00:09:06,802 --> 00:09:08,802
for a second, and these...
151
00:09:08,885 --> 00:09:11,134
three sketchy guys
just came out of nowhere,
152
00:09:11,218 --> 00:09:12,635
and I thought they were
gonna rob me
153
00:09:12,718 --> 00:09:14,551
or... I don't know what.
154
00:09:14,635 --> 00:09:16,843
My God. Are you okay?
155
00:09:16,927 --> 00:09:18,301
I-I locked up. I didn't know
156
00:09:18,385 --> 00:09:19,760
if they were still
hanging around,
157
00:09:19,843 --> 00:09:21,277
and I didn't want to go home
or take the L that late
158
00:09:21,301 --> 00:09:22,843
in case they tried to follow me.
159
00:09:24,551 --> 00:09:27,343
You left the cash out when
you went in the back office?
160
00:09:28,885 --> 00:09:29,927
Yeah, it's fine.
161
00:09:33,635 --> 00:09:34,843
All right.
162
00:09:34,927 --> 00:09:37,677
Um, I'm gonna go
and take a shower,
163
00:09:37,760 --> 00:09:41,218
and, I will be back
for the lunch shift,
164
00:09:41,301 --> 00:09:43,093
and it won't happen again.
165
00:09:48,343 --> 00:09:50,051
See? Shampoo.
166
00:09:50,134 --> 00:09:52,218
Not dish liquid.
167
00:09:52,301 --> 00:09:53,843
That's an interesting concept.
168
00:09:53,968 --> 00:09:55,051
Here, let me show you.
169
00:09:56,635 --> 00:09:58,093
All right.
170
00:10:02,551 --> 00:10:05,468
Man. Yeah, that...
171
00:10:05,551 --> 00:10:07,343
that actually feels really good.
172
00:10:07,426 --> 00:10:09,301
I give great head?
173
00:10:09,385 --> 00:10:10,861
Yeah, it's better
than your regular head.
174
00:10:10,885 --> 00:10:12,093
- Hey!
- Knock, knock, knock!
175
00:10:12,176 --> 00:10:13,635
- Just me.
- Jesus, dude!
176
00:10:13,718 --> 00:10:14,861
And I'm not looking
at your dick.
177
00:10:14,885 --> 00:10:15,944
I just left my retainer in here.
178
00:10:15,968 --> 00:10:17,385
Ew!
179
00:10:17,468 --> 00:10:18,927
I lied.
I looked at your dick. Bye!
180
00:10:19,009 --> 00:10:20,527
Hey, your stupid boyfriend
still owes me $300
181
00:10:20,551 --> 00:10:22,635
for the Comcast bill!
182
00:10:24,510 --> 00:10:26,510
You gotta lose those guys.
183
00:10:26,593 --> 00:10:27,778
Yeah, then I gotta go
through the bullshit
184
00:10:27,802 --> 00:10:29,551
of getting a new roommate.
185
00:10:29,635 --> 00:10:31,718
Okay, turn around. Your turn.
186
00:10:32,718 --> 00:10:35,009
- All right.
- Are you off today?
187
00:10:35,093 --> 00:10:36,468
Yeah.
188
00:10:36,551 --> 00:10:37,927
Me too.
189
00:10:39,134 --> 00:10:40,885
We should do something.
190
00:10:40,968 --> 00:10:42,927
Why? You're not
hanging around with Boone?
191
00:10:43,009 --> 00:10:45,218
No, he's on his way
back to Yemen.
192
00:10:45,301 --> 00:10:47,051
Isn't that where
all those land mines are?
193
00:10:47,134 --> 00:10:48,760
Fingers crossed.
194
00:10:48,843 --> 00:10:51,093
So let's hang out.
Never done that before.
195
00:10:51,176 --> 00:10:53,510
We could see if we even
like each other.
196
00:10:53,593 --> 00:10:55,468
I got boring shit to do all day.
197
00:10:55,551 --> 00:10:58,093
Me too. We can do it together.
198
00:10:58,176 --> 00:11:01,134
Aah! Turn around.
199
00:11:01,218 --> 00:11:02,885
- Take a look.
- Nice.
200
00:11:02,968 --> 00:11:04,426
- It's good.
- Yeah, I like it.
201
00:11:04,510 --> 00:11:05,694
Right, you see,
I give good head too.
202
00:11:05,718 --> 00:11:08,760
What is this?
203
00:11:09,635 --> 00:11:13,051
Diablas! Las diablas!
204
00:11:13,134 --> 00:11:14,551
Santiago.
205
00:11:14,635 --> 00:11:16,551
He probably had
a nightmare again.
206
00:11:18,218 --> 00:11:19,343
Die! Die!
207
00:11:19,426 --> 00:11:22,134
Speaking Spanish.
208
00:11:22,218 --> 00:11:24,176
Girls! Whoa, whoa, whoa.
209
00:11:24,259 --> 00:11:27,218
- Stop. What are you doing?
- Hey! You're hurting him!
210
00:11:27,301 --> 00:11:29,343
- You duct taped him?
- And handcuffs?
211
00:11:29,426 --> 00:11:30,927
Santiago, I am so sorry.
212
00:11:31,009 --> 00:11:32,635
You have to forgive them.
213
00:11:32,718 --> 00:11:34,635
The-the girls
are a little bit wild.
214
00:11:34,718 --> 00:11:37,176
Preschool was supposed
to be taming them.
215
00:11:37,259 --> 00:11:39,551
Come on, baby.
Let's go get you some juice.
216
00:11:40,802 --> 00:11:43,551
Girls, what has gotten into you?
217
00:11:43,635 --> 00:11:46,009
- We don't hurt people.
- We don't?
218
00:11:46,093 --> 00:11:48,259
No, of course not.
We have to be nice,
219
00:11:48,343 --> 00:11:50,093
and Santiago's
part of our family.
220
00:11:50,176 --> 00:11:52,385
- No.
- Yes, honey,
221
00:11:52,468 --> 00:11:54,218
and his sister's
gonna be here soon too.
222
00:11:54,301 --> 00:11:56,426
No, they go home.
223
00:11:56,510 --> 00:11:58,426
They don't have a home.
224
00:11:58,510 --> 00:12:00,843
Bad people wanted
to turn them into sex slaves
225
00:12:00,927 --> 00:12:02,009
and gang members.
226
00:12:02,093 --> 00:12:03,593
Kev, please stop talking.
227
00:12:03,677 --> 00:12:05,009
I'm trying to teach them. I'm...
228
00:12:05,093 --> 00:12:06,613
They're four years old.
Come on, girls.
229
00:12:06,677 --> 00:12:07,694
It's time to get dressed
for school.
230
00:12:07,718 --> 00:12:09,218
Take Santiago to the bar.
231
00:12:11,885 --> 00:12:13,134
Santiago.
232
00:12:13,218 --> 00:12:15,009
What do you say?
233
00:12:15,093 --> 00:12:17,013
Me and you having some
quality dad time together?
234
00:12:17,093 --> 00:12:18,385
Let's do it!
235
00:12:18,468 --> 00:12:19,968
No, no.
236
00:12:20,051 --> 00:12:21,718
God, I'm so sorry.
237
00:12:24,677 --> 00:12:25,843
Yeah, just hold up the shirt.
238
00:12:25,927 --> 00:12:28,218
Nice!
239
00:12:28,301 --> 00:12:31,677
Hey, Hobo Loco is trending
in the top 50 right now.
240
00:12:31,760 --> 00:12:33,277
Thought we'd have, like,
30 homeless here
241
00:12:33,301 --> 00:12:34,218
and that'd be it.
242
00:12:34,301 --> 00:12:37,051
Hey, everyone!
243
00:12:37,134 --> 00:12:39,259
Let me all hear you say,
244
00:12:39,343 --> 00:12:41,510
"I love Hobo Loco!"
245
00:12:41,593 --> 00:12:44,510
I love Hobo Loco!
246
00:12:50,343 --> 00:12:52,009
Are you fucking kidding me?
247
00:12:52,093 --> 00:12:53,635
Who are all these people?
248
00:12:53,718 --> 00:12:55,718
Jesus.
249
00:12:55,802 --> 00:13:00,051
Hey, is everybody here
for the Hobo Loco competition?
250
00:13:00,134 --> 00:13:02,551
Apparently so,
but I'm gonna win this thing.
251
00:13:03,843 --> 00:13:06,635
Gonna be hard,
since I'm a shoo-in.
252
00:13:06,718 --> 00:13:08,343
That right?
253
00:13:08,426 --> 00:13:11,301
I've never held the same job
for more than 37 days.
254
00:13:11,385 --> 00:13:13,843
I spent my life savings
on a Blockbuster franchise
255
00:13:13,927 --> 00:13:15,468
in 2013.
256
00:13:16,843 --> 00:13:19,885
I buried a bipolar wife,
a cancer-riddled girlfriend,
257
00:13:19,968 --> 00:13:21,885
and a mother who never loved me.
258
00:13:21,968 --> 00:13:23,885
Two-thirds of my penis
got blown off
259
00:13:23,968 --> 00:13:25,885
in the First Gulf War.
260
00:13:25,968 --> 00:13:28,426
I won the lottery in 2006
261
00:13:28,510 --> 00:13:30,301
and accidentally used
the winning ticket
262
00:13:30,385 --> 00:13:32,218
as a rolling paper.
263
00:13:32,301 --> 00:13:34,510
I grew up in Flint, Michigan.
264
00:13:39,134 --> 00:13:40,134
Frank Gallagher.
265
00:13:40,218 --> 00:13:41,760
Mikey O'Shea.
266
00:13:42,885 --> 00:13:44,968
Irish?
267
00:13:45,051 --> 00:13:48,218
Well, the dead junkie
whose wallet I acquired was.
268
00:13:48,301 --> 00:13:49,760
Very impressive.
269
00:13:51,051 --> 00:13:52,343
Why do these fucking posers
270
00:13:52,426 --> 00:13:54,677
think they can steal
our thunder?
271
00:13:54,760 --> 00:13:56,343
Because their parents told them
272
00:13:56,426 --> 00:13:58,259
they could be anything
they wanted to be.
273
00:14:00,593 --> 00:14:02,093
Let's teach 'em a lesson.
274
00:14:02,176 --> 00:14:03,176
Let's kick ass.
275
00:14:03,218 --> 00:14:04,385
Excuse us. Excuse us.
276
00:14:04,468 --> 00:14:05,385
- Excuse me!
- Excuse us.
277
00:14:05,468 --> 00:14:06,760
- VIP!
- Coming through.
278
00:14:06,843 --> 00:14:08,152
Coming through. This way.
One second.
279
00:14:08,176 --> 00:14:09,235
Look out. Hey,
hey, hey, hey, hey.
280
00:14:09,259 --> 00:14:10,968
Let the real hobos through!
281
00:14:11,051 --> 00:14:12,760
Don't be rude. Don't be rude.
282
00:14:12,843 --> 00:14:13,985
- Hey, hey, hey, hey!
- Come on, excuse us.
283
00:14:14,009 --> 00:14:16,009
- Hey! Hey, hey, hey.
- Good God.
284
00:14:16,093 --> 00:14:17,968
We're here for the competition.
285
00:14:18,051 --> 00:14:20,134
- Where do we sign?
- They cut the line!
286
00:14:20,218 --> 00:14:21,927
And that's exactly
287
00:14:22,009 --> 00:14:23,551
the kind of spunk
we're looking for.
288
00:14:23,635 --> 00:14:24,944
Do you hear that,
Phi Piggie Piggie?
289
00:14:24,968 --> 00:14:26,385
That's what they're looking for.
290
00:14:26,468 --> 00:14:29,009
Get your spunk-less ass
out of here!
291
00:14:29,093 --> 00:14:30,843
- You should learn.
- Hey, fellas.
292
00:14:30,927 --> 00:14:32,319
I justl just need you
to sign in right here.
293
00:14:32,343 --> 00:14:33,343
Right away.
294
00:14:33,426 --> 00:14:34,510
- Done.
- Again, yeah.
295
00:14:34,593 --> 00:14:35,927
Great.
296
00:14:36,009 --> 00:14:37,319
Okay, next,
I'm gonna need to test
297
00:14:37,343 --> 00:14:39,385
your baseline
blood alcohol content.
298
00:14:39,468 --> 00:14:41,677
Right this way.
299
00:14:41,760 --> 00:14:43,677
Here we are.
300
00:14:51,510 --> 00:14:52,635
Point two-three.
301
00:14:52,718 --> 00:14:54,009
Nice.
302
00:14:55,009 --> 00:14:56,760
Point two-seven.
303
00:14:56,843 --> 00:14:58,343
Whoa.
304
00:14:58,426 --> 00:14:59,718
All in a day's work.
305
00:14:59,802 --> 00:15:01,593
Whoo. Great job.
306
00:15:01,677 --> 00:15:03,176
Okay, now, over here,
307
00:15:03,259 --> 00:15:04,486
you're gonna need
to drink two ounces
308
00:15:04,510 --> 00:15:07,301
of Hobo Loco
in less than 15 seconds,
309
00:15:07,385 --> 00:15:08,968
and please,
no throwing up on me.
310
00:15:09,051 --> 00:15:11,385
Please use the trash can
over here.
311
00:15:11,468 --> 00:15:15,301
Okay, and...
312
00:15:16,635 --> 00:15:18,635
OMG. That was amazing.
313
00:15:18,718 --> 00:15:19,635
It's like drinking water.
314
00:15:19,718 --> 00:15:21,426
More like watered-down water.
315
00:15:21,510 --> 00:15:23,968
Well, have a Hobo Loco hat.
316
00:15:24,051 --> 00:15:25,361
Agency will be announcing
the contestants
317
00:15:25,385 --> 00:15:26,301
in just a bit.
318
00:15:26,385 --> 00:15:27,426
All right, next.
319
00:15:29,259 --> 00:15:31,176
Good luck, J-holes.
320
00:15:31,259 --> 00:15:32,510
You hear that, douchebags?
321
00:15:35,093 --> 00:15:36,885
This is the dining area.
322
00:15:36,968 --> 00:15:38,635
I was really impressed
with your résumé.
323
00:15:38,718 --> 00:15:41,051
- Really?
- Kitchen.
324
00:15:41,134 --> 00:15:43,093
Yeah.
325
00:15:43,176 --> 00:15:44,593
Military man?
326
00:15:46,259 --> 00:15:47,510
Um, okay.
327
00:15:47,593 --> 00:15:49,718
And this is the employee lounge.
328
00:15:49,802 --> 00:15:52,927
Right in here.
329
00:15:53,009 --> 00:15:55,093
Let me know if you need
any help putting it on.
330
00:15:55,176 --> 00:15:56,176
Yeah.
331
00:15:56,259 --> 00:15:57,259
Hey, so what's the job?
332
00:15:57,343 --> 00:15:59,218
Busboy, dishwasher?
333
00:15:59,301 --> 00:16:00,802
Street corner sign spinner.
334
00:16:48,510 --> 00:16:50,343
Hey, Franny.
335
00:16:50,426 --> 00:16:51,927
What is that?
336
00:16:52,009 --> 00:16:55,176
Careful. Here.
337
00:16:55,259 --> 00:16:57,468
Hey.
338
00:17:00,843 --> 00:17:02,009
What's going on in here?
339
00:17:02,093 --> 00:17:04,760
Morning sickness.
340
00:17:04,843 --> 00:17:06,301
Snaking the tub.
341
00:17:06,385 --> 00:17:07,885
I got it.
342
00:17:09,009 --> 00:17:10,635
That's disgusting!
343
00:17:12,009 --> 00:17:13,635
Damn.
344
00:17:13,718 --> 00:17:15,402
I should add "plumber"
to my welding résumé.
345
00:17:15,426 --> 00:17:17,259
All right, may I take
a shower, please?
346
00:17:17,343 --> 00:17:19,426
Yeah.
347
00:17:19,510 --> 00:17:22,468
Hey, do you ever do those things
in the saver special?
348
00:17:22,551 --> 00:17:24,843
Check for carbon monoxide leaks
or clean the dryer vent?
349
00:17:24,927 --> 00:17:27,259
No. Too busy, you know,
350
00:17:27,343 --> 00:17:30,009
raising five kids and Frank.
351
00:17:30,093 --> 00:17:31,718
Well, make it quick in there.
352
00:17:31,802 --> 00:17:33,027
Make sure you clean up
your hair in the drain after.
353
00:17:33,051 --> 00:17:34,301
Yeah, all right.
354
00:17:37,718 --> 00:17:39,802
Debs.
355
00:17:39,885 --> 00:17:41,885
Sorry I snapped at you.
356
00:17:41,968 --> 00:17:43,343
You're doing a good job.
357
00:17:43,426 --> 00:17:45,009
Thanks.
358
00:17:45,093 --> 00:17:46,235
Also, I'm working
the lunch shift later,
359
00:17:46,259 --> 00:17:47,802
so I'll have money
for you today.
360
00:17:47,885 --> 00:17:49,093
Good.
361
00:17:54,176 --> 00:17:57,385
Really helps
my morning sickness.
362
00:18:09,176 --> 00:18:12,343
So should we, like,
hold hands or something?
363
00:18:12,426 --> 00:18:14,885
I don't know.
Your hands get all sweaty?
364
00:18:15,009 --> 00:18:17,593
They will now
that you asked me like that.
365
00:18:17,677 --> 00:18:19,218
Are you a top or bottom?
366
00:18:19,301 --> 00:18:20,677
- Bottom.
- See, me too.
367
00:18:20,760 --> 00:18:22,176
This will never work.
368
00:18:22,259 --> 00:18:23,885
It's all right.
We're here anyway.
369
00:18:25,426 --> 00:18:26,635
A nursing home?
370
00:18:26,718 --> 00:18:28,718
Yeah.
I volunteer here once a month.
371
00:18:28,802 --> 00:18:30,426
Come on, you can help me.
372
00:18:30,510 --> 00:18:32,259
Shit.
373
00:18:32,343 --> 00:18:34,468
Hey, are we gonna
be cleaning bedpans or...
374
00:18:35,927 --> 00:18:37,593
What up, bitches?
375
00:18:37,677 --> 00:18:40,134
Tami, Audrey got
denture cream in my hair.
376
00:18:40,218 --> 00:18:41,551
Aww, let me see that.
377
00:18:41,635 --> 00:18:43,009
I did not do that.
378
00:18:43,093 --> 00:18:45,051
Tomorrow you'll say
you did do it.
379
00:18:45,134 --> 00:18:47,051
Make up your Alzheimer's-y mind.
380
00:18:47,134 --> 00:18:49,468
All right, ladies.
Who's at the bowls first?
381
00:18:49,551 --> 00:18:52,176
I've got an assistant today,
so we can do two at a time.
382
00:18:52,259 --> 00:18:54,176
- Me.
- Me too.
383
00:18:54,259 --> 00:18:55,778
- What are we doing?
- Washing their hair.
384
00:18:55,802 --> 00:18:57,051
We're washing their hair?
385
00:18:57,134 --> 00:18:58,593
Yeah. Watch out for that one.
386
00:18:58,677 --> 00:18:59,819
She's handsy,
likes to grab a dick.
387
00:18:59,843 --> 00:19:02,468
Hey. You all set?
388
00:19:16,635 --> 00:19:17,635
Hey.
389
00:19:17,677 --> 00:19:18,843
Hey. What's up, man?
390
00:19:18,927 --> 00:19:20,259
What are you doing?
391
00:19:20,343 --> 00:19:21,968
Giving Santiago
more of an American look
392
00:19:22,051 --> 00:19:23,343
before we go to The Alibi.
393
00:19:42,551 --> 00:19:44,134
You're getting his sister too?
394
00:19:44,218 --> 00:19:45,843
Yeah. Foster people are gonna be
395
00:19:45,927 --> 00:19:47,760
dropping her off
a little bit later.
396
00:19:47,843 --> 00:19:49,718
There you go.
397
00:19:51,843 --> 00:19:53,218
And the final touch.
398
00:19:56,176 --> 00:19:58,635
Okay.
399
00:19:58,718 --> 00:20:00,468
How's he look?
400
00:20:00,551 --> 00:20:01,677
Like a cheesy American.
401
00:20:01,760 --> 00:20:03,510
Nice.
402
00:20:09,301 --> 00:20:11,343
So you got a lady friend
back home?
403
00:20:11,426 --> 00:20:13,176
Sure do.
404
00:20:13,259 --> 00:20:15,218
Jasmine Dawn.
405
00:20:15,301 --> 00:20:17,551
Except she kicked me out
three years ago.
406
00:20:19,259 --> 00:20:21,218
Strapping young man like you?
407
00:20:21,301 --> 00:20:22,760
Yeah, well, I had
too many blackouts
408
00:20:22,843 --> 00:20:24,968
for her to deal with.
409
00:20:25,051 --> 00:20:27,134
But I become the Hobo Loco Man,
though,
410
00:20:27,218 --> 00:20:29,259
she gotta take me back, right?
411
00:20:29,343 --> 00:20:31,551
As long as she'll settle
for runner-up.
412
00:20:31,635 --> 00:20:33,051
Won't have to.
413
00:20:33,134 --> 00:20:35,343
You got loser
written all over you.
414
00:20:35,426 --> 00:20:37,927
All right, good afternoon!
415
00:20:38,009 --> 00:20:39,927
Yes, welcome.
416
00:20:40,009 --> 00:20:42,343
Thank you for entering
our Hobo Loco Man search...
417
00:20:42,426 --> 00:20:44,968
Or Hobo Loco Woman,
418
00:20:45,051 --> 00:20:47,468
of course. Yes, ladies.
419
00:20:47,551 --> 00:20:49,351
All right, we have reviewed
your applications,
420
00:20:49,385 --> 00:20:51,027
and we're ready to announce
the 20 contestants.
421
00:20:51,051 --> 00:20:52,968
If your name is called,
please come on up
422
00:20:53,051 --> 00:20:54,802
to the Hobo Loco porch.
423
00:20:54,885 --> 00:20:57,051
Bethany Houseman!
424
00:20:57,134 --> 00:20:59,218
- There's Bethany!
- Hey, all right.
425
00:20:59,301 --> 00:21:00,551
Next up, Victor...
426
00:21:00,635 --> 00:21:02,968
"Nag-high."
427
00:21:03,051 --> 00:21:04,677
- Victor! My man.
- Yay!
428
00:21:04,760 --> 00:21:06,009
- All right.
- Next up
429
00:21:06,093 --> 00:21:07,677
Frank Gallagher!
430
00:21:07,760 --> 00:21:09,510
Whoo! Yes! Where is he?
431
00:21:09,593 --> 00:21:10,611
- Hey, there he is.
- That's Frank.
432
00:21:10,635 --> 00:21:12,093
There he is!
433
00:21:12,176 --> 00:21:15,593
All right. Gloria Sweetland.
434
00:21:16,510 --> 00:21:18,134
She's got fans.
435
00:21:20,051 --> 00:21:23,259
Mikey O'Shea!
436
00:21:23,343 --> 00:21:24,510
- Mikey, Mikey, Mikey.
- Yeah.
437
00:21:24,593 --> 00:21:26,927
Yay!
438
00:21:27,009 --> 00:21:28,510
We got a competition now.
439
00:21:28,593 --> 00:21:30,176
- Yeah.
- Hola.
440
00:21:30,259 --> 00:21:32,843
Next up, Mrs. O'Coin.
441
00:21:32,927 --> 00:21:34,802
Right. There she is.
442
00:21:40,093 --> 00:21:42,134
Hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey.
443
00:21:42,218 --> 00:21:44,718
No means no, Audrey, all right?
444
00:21:44,802 --> 00:21:46,051
There you go.
445
00:21:47,843 --> 00:21:49,051
So what boring stuff are you
446
00:21:49,134 --> 00:21:50,968
gonna have me do with you today?
447
00:21:51,051 --> 00:21:53,843
Gotta buy a new phone charger,
448
00:21:53,927 --> 00:21:55,551
some socks,
449
00:21:55,635 --> 00:21:57,468
then go grocery shopping.
450
00:21:57,551 --> 00:21:58,718
Debs has us on rotation.
451
00:21:58,802 --> 00:22:00,385
It's my turn.
452
00:22:00,468 --> 00:22:02,593
I can help you get
some healthy stuff.
453
00:22:02,677 --> 00:22:04,968
Do you know they actually have
produce aisles
454
00:22:05,051 --> 00:22:06,426
at the grocery store?
455
00:22:06,510 --> 00:22:08,468
You don't say.
456
00:22:10,385 --> 00:22:13,259
This feels so good.
457
00:22:13,343 --> 00:22:14,802
It's been a long time
since a boy's
458
00:22:14,885 --> 00:22:17,009
run his fingers through my hair.
459
00:22:19,343 --> 00:22:21,259
Hey, how long
you been volunteering here?
460
00:22:21,343 --> 00:22:23,009
Since beauty school.
461
00:22:23,093 --> 00:22:25,051
My Grandma Peggy
used to live here.
462
00:22:25,134 --> 00:22:26,885
What'd you say?
463
00:22:26,968 --> 00:22:29,051
I wasn't talking to you,
Broom Hilda.
464
00:22:29,885 --> 00:22:32,009
I was telling Lip
about my Grandma Peggy.
465
00:22:32,093 --> 00:22:34,051
The whore?
466
00:22:34,134 --> 00:22:36,843
She fucked your boyfriend
one time. Get over it.
467
00:22:36,927 --> 00:22:38,736
You know, that shit shouldn't
matter once you're past 75.
468
00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:40,218
I will never forget.
469
00:22:40,301 --> 00:22:42,061
Okay, well, that's good.
You hold on to that.
470
00:22:47,468 --> 00:22:49,760
You're smiling at me
in that way.
471
00:22:50,843 --> 00:22:52,093
What way?
472
00:22:52,176 --> 00:22:54,176
That you like me.
473
00:22:54,259 --> 00:22:55,968
Well, it's kind of hard not to
when you're
474
00:22:56,051 --> 00:22:57,593
putting rollers
in some lady's hair
475
00:22:57,677 --> 00:22:59,218
on your day off.
476
00:23:00,218 --> 00:23:01,593
- Whoa.
- Audrey, stop.
477
00:23:01,677 --> 00:23:03,968
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- Leave him alone.
478
00:23:04,051 --> 00:23:05,635
That's my dick.
479
00:23:21,343 --> 00:23:22,551
'Sup, small fry?
480
00:23:22,635 --> 00:23:24,134
Saw the sign in the window.
481
00:23:24,218 --> 00:23:25,802
"Help Wanted." I need a job.
482
00:23:25,885 --> 00:23:27,051
How old are you?
483
00:23:27,134 --> 00:23:28,134
Twenty-five.
484
00:23:29,593 --> 00:23:31,301
Yeah, come back when you're 31.
485
00:23:31,385 --> 00:23:32,968
Okay.
486
00:23:36,301 --> 00:23:38,927
What do you do with those
squeezed-out lemons?
487
00:23:39,009 --> 00:23:40,009
Whoo!
488
00:23:46,593 --> 00:23:49,301
Okay, congratulations, hobos.
489
00:23:49,385 --> 00:23:50,527
For the next week,
you'll be sleeping
490
00:23:50,551 --> 00:23:52,677
in this backyard
and be required to drink
491
00:23:52,760 --> 00:23:55,551
16 ounces of Hobo Loco daily.
492
00:23:55,635 --> 00:23:57,718
Each day, you'll be given
timed challenges.
493
00:23:57,802 --> 00:23:59,551
Those of you who fail
to complete the tasks
494
00:23:59,635 --> 00:24:01,426
will be eliminated.
495
00:24:01,510 --> 00:24:03,885
You'll also need
to create brand awareness.
496
00:24:03,968 --> 00:24:07,343
You each get a phone
and two quarts of Hobo Loco.
497
00:24:07,426 --> 00:24:09,259
Take lots of photos and videos
498
00:24:09,343 --> 00:24:11,510
of folks sampling
your Hobo Loco.
499
00:24:11,593 --> 00:24:13,510
All right, who's ready
for the first challenge?
500
00:24:13,593 --> 00:24:15,843
- Yeah!
- Yay.
501
00:24:15,927 --> 00:24:18,259
In the spirit of a true hobo,
each contestant will forage
502
00:24:18,343 --> 00:24:20,885
for their own bedding
to sleep on tonight.
503
00:24:20,968 --> 00:24:22,426
You will be judged
504
00:24:22,510 --> 00:24:25,385
on creativity
and resourcefulness.
505
00:24:25,468 --> 00:24:28,426
You have one hour.
506
00:24:28,510 --> 00:24:30,593
All right, let's go out there,
start hobo-ing!
507
00:24:30,677 --> 00:24:31,968
Okay!
508
00:24:32,051 --> 00:24:33,593
- Frank!
- What are you doing?
509
00:24:33,677 --> 00:24:34,736
- Come on, Frank!
- Get off of me. No!
510
00:24:34,760 --> 00:24:36,551
Wait for me!
511
00:24:36,635 --> 00:24:38,176
Argh, matey.
512
00:24:38,259 --> 00:24:40,551
Popcorn shrimp is back.
513
00:24:41,677 --> 00:24:43,343
Fucking sh...
514
00:24:44,718 --> 00:24:47,009
Aye, aye, matey.
Popcorn shrimp is back.
515
00:24:47,093 --> 00:24:49,968
Hey, butt pirate,
need a soda with your shrimp?
516
00:24:50,051 --> 00:24:51,176
Fuck you, douchebag!
517
00:24:52,885 --> 00:24:55,301
Fuck.
518
00:24:55,385 --> 00:24:57,301
Aye, aye, matey.
519
00:24:57,385 --> 00:25:00,176
Popcorn shrimp. Fuck.
520
00:25:01,468 --> 00:25:03,468
When did we plant grass in here?
521
00:25:03,551 --> 00:25:05,927
- That's mold.
- Fuck.
522
00:25:06,009 --> 00:25:08,009
When'd you guys
suddenly get into cleaning?
523
00:25:08,093 --> 00:25:09,718
Makes Santiago happy.
524
00:25:09,802 --> 00:25:11,510
Yeah, we're doing stuff
he likes.
525
00:25:13,259 --> 00:25:14,968
Hey, Santiago said
526
00:25:15,051 --> 00:25:17,009
your girls are trying
to murder him.
527
00:25:17,093 --> 00:25:18,510
What?
528
00:25:18,593 --> 00:25:20,110
Is that what they were doing
this morning?
529
00:25:20,134 --> 00:25:21,569
Wait, that's what they
were doing this morning?
530
00:25:21,593 --> 00:25:23,051
He called them las diablas...
531
00:25:23,134 --> 00:25:25,009
The devils.
532
00:25:25,093 --> 00:25:26,152
But he's okay with it,
because he doesn't want you
533
00:25:26,176 --> 00:25:27,426
to send him back.
534
00:25:27,510 --> 00:25:29,218
We're not gonna send him back.
535
00:25:29,301 --> 00:25:30,569
Why would the girls
want to murder him?
536
00:25:30,593 --> 00:25:32,176
They're not trying
to murder anyone.
537
00:25:32,259 --> 00:25:34,069
- They're just playing.
- Maybe they're jealous...
538
00:25:34,093 --> 00:25:35,677
Sibling rivalry.
539
00:25:35,760 --> 00:25:37,301
Maybe they're
just not into having
540
00:25:37,385 --> 00:25:38,611
some random brown dude
who doesn't speak English
541
00:25:38,635 --> 00:25:39,635
living in their house.
542
00:25:39,718 --> 00:25:40,593
They're brown too.
543
00:25:40,677 --> 00:25:41,968
Different shade of brown.
544
00:25:42,051 --> 00:25:43,885
That's crazy.
545
00:25:43,968 --> 00:25:45,819
Just as crazy as white people,
who are actually pink,
546
00:25:45,843 --> 00:25:47,569
thinking all black people
are the same color.
547
00:25:47,593 --> 00:25:49,069
Well, what about
brownish white people,
548
00:25:49,093 --> 00:25:50,968
like some Italians
549
00:25:51,051 --> 00:25:53,009
or Portuguese or Spanish?
550
00:25:53,093 --> 00:25:54,677
They can be
as brown as Santiago.
551
00:25:54,760 --> 00:25:56,551
They're European brown.
552
00:25:56,635 --> 00:25:58,110
All right, I'm lost.
What are you talking about?
553
00:25:58,134 --> 00:25:59,551
Okay, it's real simple.
Your girls
554
00:25:59,635 --> 00:26:01,385
are a different brown
than Santiago,
555
00:26:01,468 --> 00:26:02,736
so they want his different brown
556
00:26:02,760 --> 00:26:04,051
to go home where he belongs
557
00:26:04,134 --> 00:26:05,510
and leave their brown to get
558
00:26:05,593 --> 00:26:07,259
all the good stuff from America.
559
00:26:07,343 --> 00:26:08,569
Are you saying our girls
are racist?
560
00:26:08,593 --> 00:26:10,009
He's saying Amy and Gemma
561
00:26:10,093 --> 00:26:12,093
don't understand
what's going on.
562
00:26:12,176 --> 00:26:13,536
What if they want
to murder Martina
563
00:26:13,593 --> 00:26:14,802
when she shows up?
564
00:26:14,885 --> 00:26:16,385
No one's murdering anyone.
565
00:26:16,468 --> 00:26:18,468
- Who's Martina?
- Santiago's sister.
566
00:26:18,551 --> 00:26:20,051
If she's the same color brown
as him,
567
00:26:20,134 --> 00:26:21,510
they're gonna want
to murder her.
568
00:26:21,593 --> 00:26:23,259
Shut up, Tommy.
It'd like Kermit said.
569
00:26:23,343 --> 00:26:24,551
They're just jealous.
570
00:26:24,635 --> 00:26:26,075
We're gonna talk to them
after school
571
00:26:26,134 --> 00:26:27,319
and tell them there's plenty
of good stuff in America
572
00:26:27,343 --> 00:26:28,551
for all the brown people
573
00:26:28,635 --> 00:26:29,736
so they don't have
to end up in jail
574
00:26:29,760 --> 00:26:31,426
for murdering
the different brown people
575
00:26:31,510 --> 00:26:32,710
or something like that, right?
576
00:26:37,718 --> 00:26:39,468
Hey, I recognize you.
577
00:26:39,551 --> 00:26:41,259
You're that crazy lady's
ex-husband.
578
00:26:41,343 --> 00:26:43,885
- Yeah. Is she here?
- Gallaghers don't snitch.
579
00:26:43,968 --> 00:26:46,051
I got a phone app
that says she's in there.
580
00:26:46,134 --> 00:26:48,093
Okay.
581
00:26:48,176 --> 00:26:50,051
Make yourself useful
and get the door.
582
00:26:50,134 --> 00:26:52,635
All right.
583
00:26:52,718 --> 00:26:54,718
There you go.
584
00:26:56,968 --> 00:26:58,426
Cool if I look around?
585
00:26:58,510 --> 00:26:59,760
Knock yourself out.
586
00:26:59,843 --> 00:27:01,134
Might be upstairs.
587
00:27:03,343 --> 00:27:04,551
- Ingrid?
- You fall?
588
00:27:04,635 --> 00:27:06,051
- No.
- Ingrid!
589
00:27:06,134 --> 00:27:07,927
Just making sure
my embryos stay in.
590
00:27:08,009 --> 00:27:09,176
Where are you?
591
00:27:09,259 --> 00:27:10,569
I'm selling lemonade
to make money
592
00:27:10,593 --> 00:27:12,134
so I can sleep indoors again.
593
00:27:12,218 --> 00:27:13,593
Ingrid?
594
00:27:13,677 --> 00:27:14,343
What the hell are you doing?
595
00:27:14,426 --> 00:27:16,009
Vacuuming the lint
596
00:27:16,093 --> 00:27:17,569
out of the dryer vents
before they catch on fire.
597
00:27:17,593 --> 00:27:19,093
Ingrid, where...
598
00:27:19,176 --> 00:27:20,718
Ingrid.
599
00:27:20,802 --> 00:27:22,802
Ingy.
600
00:27:22,885 --> 00:27:23,802
What are you doing here?
601
00:27:23,885 --> 00:27:25,051
Dr. Kwan called me.
602
00:27:25,134 --> 00:27:26,334
She told me you were pregnant.
603
00:27:26,385 --> 00:27:27,718
That's wonderful.
604
00:27:27,802 --> 00:27:29,677
Wonderful?
605
00:27:29,760 --> 00:27:31,385
You never wanted me
to have children
606
00:27:31,468 --> 00:27:33,093
because of my condition.
607
00:27:33,176 --> 00:27:34,760
Well, now that you are pregnant,
608
00:27:34,843 --> 00:27:36,259
it's a beautiful miracle.
609
00:27:36,343 --> 00:27:37,760
Let's do this together.
610
00:27:37,843 --> 00:27:38,968
What?
611
00:27:39,051 --> 00:27:40,635
They're not even yours.
612
00:27:40,718 --> 00:27:41,760
They're Frank's.
613
00:27:42,635 --> 00:27:44,760
Yes, but you just met him.
614
00:27:44,843 --> 00:27:46,778
You think he's really committed
to having more kids?
615
00:27:46,802 --> 00:27:48,885
Yes. Yes.
616
00:27:48,968 --> 00:27:50,778
But I'm the one who's always
been there for you,
617
00:27:50,802 --> 00:27:52,218
and I always will,
618
00:27:52,301 --> 00:27:54,343
so let's get you
back on your meds
619
00:27:54,426 --> 00:27:57,259
and then we'll go
for a checkup with Dr. Kwan.
620
00:27:57,343 --> 00:27:59,009
You're trying to trick me.
621
00:27:59,093 --> 00:28:01,635
You're gonna get me
on that exam table
622
00:28:01,718 --> 00:28:04,510
and then have Kwan just suck
the embryos out of me!
623
00:28:04,593 --> 00:28:06,718
No, I won't. I won't, I promise.
624
00:28:06,802 --> 00:28:08,760
We'll keep two.
We'll have twins.
625
00:28:08,843 --> 00:28:10,027
Wouldn't that be great? Twins?
626
00:28:10,051 --> 00:28:12,218
Bullshit.
627
00:28:12,301 --> 00:28:14,009
You don't want my babies.
628
00:28:14,093 --> 00:28:16,551
Frank does. Frank loves me.
629
00:28:16,635 --> 00:28:20,176
He loves all six of my embryos.
630
00:28:20,259 --> 00:28:22,718
I have a phone patient now,
631
00:28:22,802 --> 00:28:24,885
so please go.
632
00:28:26,385 --> 00:28:28,760
Okay, okay.
633
00:28:30,843 --> 00:28:33,176
I'll check back in later.
634
00:28:39,468 --> 00:28:40,593
Hey, Debbie.
635
00:28:43,343 --> 00:28:44,802
Randy's wrong.
636
00:28:44,885 --> 00:28:47,593
Frank'll be committed
to my six babies, right?
637
00:28:47,677 --> 00:28:49,468
Not a chance.
638
00:28:59,259 --> 00:29:01,843
What are you on my ass for?
639
00:29:01,927 --> 00:29:03,843
Find your own bedding.
This is my spot.
640
00:29:03,927 --> 00:29:05,885
I thought we could make a pact.
641
00:29:05,968 --> 00:29:07,593
Either one of us wins,
642
00:29:07,677 --> 00:29:10,218
we split the spokesman money,
50/50.
643
00:29:10,301 --> 00:29:13,426
You trying to hone in
on my dough?
644
00:29:13,510 --> 00:29:15,968
Or am I trying to give you
half of mine?
645
00:29:17,802 --> 00:29:20,593
You're a crafty dude, Mikey O.
646
00:29:22,385 --> 00:29:24,635
I'm a lone wolf. Go.
647
00:29:26,176 --> 00:29:27,677
Suit yourself.
648
00:29:27,760 --> 00:29:29,343
- Suit yourself.
- Go!
649
00:29:35,968 --> 00:29:37,259
Jackpot.
650
00:29:43,968 --> 00:29:45,843
Hey, yo! What are you
doing in that truck?
651
00:29:45,927 --> 00:29:48,426
Get out of there!
652
00:29:49,760 --> 00:29:51,218
- Hey!
- I-I'm...
653
00:29:51,301 --> 00:29:52,927
Get back here!
654
00:29:53,009 --> 00:29:55,051
Where the fuck
do you think you're going?
655
00:29:57,843 --> 00:29:59,093
That's what you get!
656
00:29:59,176 --> 00:30:02,093
Serves you right, asshole!
657
00:30:02,176 --> 00:30:04,218
Yeah, you better keep running!
658
00:30:09,802 --> 00:30:11,802
So was it weird buying
actual green things
659
00:30:11,885 --> 00:30:13,093
at the grocery store?
660
00:30:13,176 --> 00:30:14,569
Hey, I've bought
green things before.
661
00:30:14,593 --> 00:30:17,134
Guacamole, Mountain Dew,
662
00:30:17,218 --> 00:30:19,051
Jell-O,
663
00:30:19,134 --> 00:30:20,802
mint chocolate chip ice cream.
664
00:30:20,885 --> 00:30:22,551
You gonna list every
crappy green thing?
665
00:30:22,635 --> 00:30:24,259
Yeah, I can go on.
Shamrock shakes.
666
00:30:24,343 --> 00:30:25,760
Green eggs and ham.
667
00:30:29,760 --> 00:30:31,301
Xan?
668
00:30:32,468 --> 00:30:34,426
I didn't know where else to go.
669
00:30:38,009 --> 00:30:39,259
Aye, matey!
670
00:30:40,760 --> 00:30:42,843
Popcorn shrimp is back.
671
00:30:44,968 --> 00:30:47,968
My God. Check this out.
672
00:30:48,051 --> 00:30:49,093
Gallagher?
673
00:30:49,176 --> 00:30:50,343
Shit.
674
00:30:50,426 --> 00:30:51,718
What's up, Little Shins?
675
00:30:52,635 --> 00:30:54,510
What, you out here selling?
676
00:30:54,593 --> 00:30:55,593
Just popcorn shrimp.
677
00:30:59,218 --> 00:31:00,593
'Cause we took over this corner.
678
00:31:00,677 --> 00:31:02,259
I don't like no competition.
679
00:31:02,343 --> 00:31:04,677
Hey, you won't have any from me.
680
00:31:04,760 --> 00:31:06,176
So how do I know this whole
681
00:31:06,259 --> 00:31:07,802
gay pirate shit
ain't some front?
682
00:31:07,885 --> 00:31:09,445
I've been out of the business
for years.
683
00:31:09,510 --> 00:31:10,990
I'm just working
at Captain Bob's now.
684
00:31:13,343 --> 00:31:16,718
I got trust issues, man.
What can I say?
685
00:31:16,802 --> 00:31:19,593
I'm gonna have to shake your
Johnny Depp-looking ass down,
686
00:31:19,677 --> 00:31:20,778
make sure
you ain't got no stash.
687
00:31:20,802 --> 00:31:23,134
Yo, I swear to you, I don't.
688
00:31:23,218 --> 00:31:24,385
Shake him.
689
00:31:24,468 --> 00:31:26,968
Fuck. They're just shrimp!
690
00:31:30,134 --> 00:31:31,760
Come on, put me down,
motherfucker!
691
00:31:31,843 --> 00:31:33,760
Watch the hat!
692
00:31:43,468 --> 00:31:44,468
So what happened?
693
00:31:44,551 --> 00:31:45,843
Xan, where's your mom?
694
00:31:46,635 --> 00:31:47,760
Don't know.
695
00:31:48,843 --> 00:31:49,843
Here.
696
00:31:49,927 --> 00:31:51,718
I'll make you something to eat.
697
00:31:51,802 --> 00:31:54,301
W-when's the last time
you saw her?
698
00:31:54,385 --> 00:31:55,927
She went to get pizza.
699
00:31:56,009 --> 00:31:58,426
I waited in the motel.
700
00:31:58,510 --> 00:31:59,968
Watched TV and stuff.
701
00:32:00,051 --> 00:32:01,251
What, and she never came back?
702
00:32:08,093 --> 00:32:09,301
Here you go.
703
00:32:12,551 --> 00:32:14,009
Motel guy kicked me out.
704
00:32:14,093 --> 00:32:15,510
When did this happen?
705
00:32:15,593 --> 00:32:17,885
Couple days ago.
706
00:32:17,968 --> 00:32:19,802
Where have you been
since then, Xan?
707
00:32:21,093 --> 00:32:23,051
Sometimes my mom works
at this truck stop.
708
00:32:23,134 --> 00:32:24,677
I just hung out there.
709
00:32:24,760 --> 00:32:26,426
A truck stop?
710
00:32:26,510 --> 00:32:29,259
There's a bunch
of guys there, but...
711
00:32:29,343 --> 00:32:30,760
my mom never showed up.
712
00:32:30,843 --> 00:32:32,593
Wait, wait, wait,
a bunch of guys?
713
00:32:32,677 --> 00:32:34,069
W-what does that mean?
They fucking touch you?
714
00:32:34,093 --> 00:32:35,802
- Chill out.
- No, I'm not gonna chill
715
00:32:35,885 --> 00:32:37,069
the fuck out.
Her mother ditched her again!
716
00:32:37,093 --> 00:32:40,176
Okay, well, you are scaring her.
717
00:32:40,259 --> 00:32:41,802
I'll give her a bath.
I'll talk to her.
718
00:32:41,885 --> 00:32:43,635
I'll find out
if anything happened.
719
00:32:43,718 --> 00:32:45,677
Okay?
720
00:32:45,760 --> 00:32:48,051
Okay.
721
00:32:52,510 --> 00:32:54,426
It's okay.
722
00:32:54,510 --> 00:32:56,176
I'm sorry, Xan.
723
00:33:01,134 --> 00:33:02,635
Lemonade!
724
00:33:02,718 --> 00:33:04,635
Lemonade!
Get your fresh lemonade!
725
00:33:04,718 --> 00:33:07,176
Come get your lemonade.
726
00:33:11,176 --> 00:33:13,843
Let me have one
for each one of my guys.
727
00:33:13,927 --> 00:33:16,009
That'll be five bucks.
728
00:33:17,551 --> 00:33:18,843
Keep the change.
729
00:33:18,927 --> 00:33:20,551
Thanks.
730
00:33:28,218 --> 00:33:30,093
How long are you guys
gonna be out here?
731
00:33:30,176 --> 00:33:31,635
I don't know. A while.
732
00:33:41,760 --> 00:33:43,259
You're blocking my driveway.
733
00:33:47,677 --> 00:33:50,385
Lemonade!
Get your fresh lemonade!
734
00:33:58,385 --> 00:34:00,051
Jesus.
735
00:34:00,134 --> 00:34:01,134
Want some lemonade?
736
00:34:10,635 --> 00:34:11,968
Just a Sprite.
737
00:34:12,051 --> 00:34:13,802
Last night fucked with me.
738
00:34:13,885 --> 00:34:15,301
Got a whole new attitude.
739
00:34:15,385 --> 00:34:17,176
- Great.
- Perfect.
740
00:34:17,259 --> 00:34:19,677
Tina,
I got table 41's food for you.
741
00:34:19,760 --> 00:34:20,968
Yeah, okay.
742
00:34:21,051 --> 00:34:23,927
Grilled ham and cheese...
for you,
743
00:34:24,009 --> 00:34:25,885
and the tacos must be for you.
744
00:34:25,968 --> 00:34:28,802
- Enjoy.
- Yes. Thank you.
745
00:34:28,885 --> 00:34:30,093
- Margo.
- Good afternoon.
746
00:34:30,176 --> 00:34:31,551
What brings you here?
747
00:34:31,635 --> 00:34:33,718
Police got a 911 call last night
748
00:34:33,802 --> 00:34:36,093
about a possible robbery.
749
00:34:38,009 --> 00:34:39,769
A frantic woman called,
saying that three men
750
00:34:39,843 --> 00:34:41,343
were threatening her,
751
00:34:41,426 --> 00:34:43,593
and she said they left
but she was afraid
752
00:34:43,677 --> 00:34:45,968
they were gonna come back.
753
00:34:46,051 --> 00:34:49,176
And when the police arrived,
the restaurant was closed,
754
00:34:49,259 --> 00:34:53,009
which is interesting,
since we're open 24 hours.
755
00:34:53,093 --> 00:34:54,468
Maybe they had
the wrong address.
756
00:34:54,551 --> 00:34:55,593
Stop.
757
00:34:57,718 --> 00:34:59,009
I don't want your lies,
758
00:34:59,093 --> 00:35:00,843
and you smell like booze.
759
00:35:00,927 --> 00:35:03,093
I don't know if you're drunk now
760
00:35:03,176 --> 00:35:04,696
or if you just drank
so much last night
761
00:35:04,760 --> 00:35:06,235
that it's just coming
out of your pores.
762
00:35:06,259 --> 00:35:07,593
No, I'm sober.
763
00:35:07,677 --> 00:35:09,009
You're fired.
764
00:35:09,093 --> 00:35:11,551
What?
765
00:35:11,635 --> 00:35:13,426
Well, why?
766
00:35:13,510 --> 00:35:15,635
I-I haven't had a drink
today, I swear.
767
00:35:15,718 --> 00:35:17,110
I've been getting calls
for the past month,
768
00:35:17,134 --> 00:35:20,176
from customers and vendors
and employees,
769
00:35:20,259 --> 00:35:23,176
saying that you had been drunk
on the job
770
00:35:23,259 --> 00:35:25,927
or asleep on the job
or angry on the job.
771
00:35:26,009 --> 00:35:27,968
Please don't fire me. Please.
772
00:35:28,051 --> 00:35:29,927
I-I've had
a rough couple months,
773
00:35:30,009 --> 00:35:32,259
but-but I've turned a corner.
774
00:35:32,343 --> 00:35:34,093
People who say
they've "turned a corner"...
775
00:35:34,176 --> 00:35:35,802
They haven't turned a corner.
776
00:35:35,885 --> 00:35:38,176
They're just trying
to convince everyone they have.
777
00:35:39,176 --> 00:35:40,802
Please give me another chance.
778
00:35:40,885 --> 00:35:43,218
I promise I'll straighten out.
779
00:35:43,301 --> 00:35:44,426
Good.
780
00:35:44,510 --> 00:35:45,635
- You should.
- Yes.
781
00:35:45,718 --> 00:35:48,259
But not on my watch.
782
00:35:48,343 --> 00:35:50,051
You're acting manager now,
783
00:35:50,134 --> 00:35:52,718
so you make sure she cleans
her things up and leaves.
784
00:35:59,635 --> 00:36:01,343
Fuck all of you.
785
00:36:02,134 --> 00:36:04,176
Ratting me out.
786
00:36:06,134 --> 00:36:08,968
If it weren't for me,
none of you NA motherfuckers
787
00:36:09,051 --> 00:36:11,385
would even have a job.
788
00:36:11,468 --> 00:36:13,885
I wanted to fire you
because you suck,
789
00:36:13,968 --> 00:36:15,259
but you called me, crying
790
00:36:15,343 --> 00:36:17,051
about your mother
and her medical bills,
791
00:36:17,134 --> 00:36:19,134
and I let you
keep your fucking job.
792
00:36:19,218 --> 00:36:20,093
Fiona, I think we should just...
793
00:36:20,176 --> 00:36:22,009
Shut the fuck up, Eliza.
794
00:36:22,093 --> 00:36:24,218
I'm leaving.
795
00:36:25,426 --> 00:36:27,259
And guess what.
796
00:36:27,343 --> 00:36:30,385
The cook rubbed his dick
on all of your meals.
797
00:36:30,468 --> 00:36:32,218
Yeah, enjoy.
798
00:36:35,134 --> 00:36:36,677
Can I get the check, please?
799
00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:38,802
Fuck this, matey.
800
00:36:43,093 --> 00:36:44,677
What happened to you?
801
00:36:44,760 --> 00:36:46,551
I got beat up,
shoes thrown at me,
802
00:36:46,635 --> 00:36:48,718
I don't even know how many
milk shakes and beers.
803
00:36:48,802 --> 00:36:51,051
You poor baby.
804
00:36:51,134 --> 00:36:53,551
Come here. Come here.
805
00:36:55,843 --> 00:36:58,134
Um, yeah, I don't think
it's the best idea
806
00:36:58,218 --> 00:37:00,051
to be spinning signs out there.
807
00:37:00,134 --> 00:37:01,968
Got any other jobs in here?
808
00:37:02,051 --> 00:37:03,635
Are you kidding me?
809
00:37:03,718 --> 00:37:06,051
I got a folder full
of applicants wanting jobs
810
00:37:06,134 --> 00:37:07,718
People with master's degrees,
811
00:37:07,802 --> 00:37:09,551
anthropologists
and English majors
812
00:37:09,635 --> 00:37:11,510
and useless things like that.
813
00:37:11,593 --> 00:37:13,051
Wow. Okay.
814
00:37:13,134 --> 00:37:15,301
Besides, you did a great job
out there today.
815
00:37:15,385 --> 00:37:17,635
Sales are up 20%.
816
00:37:17,718 --> 00:37:21,176
I'm ordering more
popcorn shrimp as we speak.
817
00:37:21,259 --> 00:37:23,593
So you'll be back tomorrow,
right?
818
00:37:23,677 --> 00:37:26,134
Yeah. Sure.
819
00:37:26,218 --> 00:37:27,677
Yeah.
820
00:37:27,760 --> 00:37:28,760
Yeah.
821
00:37:31,635 --> 00:37:33,875
Sweetie pies, why were you
hitting Santiago this morning?
822
00:37:33,927 --> 00:37:35,718
'Cause we don't like him.
823
00:37:35,802 --> 00:37:37,927
Why? Santiago's a good guy.
824
00:37:38,009 --> 00:37:39,009
He leaves now?
825
00:37:39,093 --> 00:37:41,051
No, baby, he doesn't leave now.
826
00:37:41,134 --> 00:37:42,259
He's staying here with us.
827
00:37:42,343 --> 00:37:44,551
He's our family.
828
00:37:47,593 --> 00:37:49,176
Fuck.
829
00:37:49,259 --> 00:37:51,385
Girls, is this
because Santiago's
830
00:37:51,468 --> 00:37:53,718
a different shade of brown
than you?
831
00:37:53,802 --> 00:37:57,009
Or, girls, is this because
you're jealous of Santiago?
832
00:37:57,093 --> 00:37:58,677
We need to treat people
833
00:37:58,760 --> 00:38:00,093
how we want to be treated.
834
00:38:00,176 --> 00:38:01,593
There are people in this world
835
00:38:01,677 --> 00:38:04,093
who want to send brown people
like us back to Africa,
836
00:38:04,176 --> 00:38:06,176
but we won't stand for it,
will we?
837
00:38:06,259 --> 00:38:08,593
No. So we also won't stand
838
00:38:08,677 --> 00:38:10,717
for them wanting to send
other kinds of brown people
839
00:38:10,760 --> 00:38:12,677
back to Central America.
840
00:38:12,760 --> 00:38:13,760
Get it?
841
00:38:15,259 --> 00:38:17,760
Let me try. Snookums,
842
00:38:17,843 --> 00:38:19,968
I used to have sibling rivalry
843
00:38:20,051 --> 00:38:22,218
with the kids
in my foster homes, okay?
844
00:38:22,301 --> 00:38:24,635
Especially this one boy,
Joey Caccitore.
845
00:38:24,718 --> 00:38:26,551
He used to kiss up
to my foster parents
846
00:38:26,635 --> 00:38:28,343
all the time,
and they would give him
847
00:38:28,426 --> 00:38:30,134
extra butterscotch pudding,
848
00:38:30,218 --> 00:38:32,593
and I thought
that they loved him more,
849
00:38:32,677 --> 00:38:33,968
but in reality,
850
00:38:34,051 --> 00:38:36,259
they just hated all of us.
851
00:38:36,343 --> 00:38:38,426
- Kev, how is that helping?
- I don't know.
852
00:38:38,510 --> 00:38:40,218
I forget that's how
the story ended.
853
00:38:40,301 --> 00:38:42,009
I'll get it.
854
00:38:42,093 --> 00:38:42,968
Talk about
the brown people more.
855
00:38:43,051 --> 00:38:44,551
I think that was helping.
856
00:38:45,176 --> 00:38:47,593
Just because Santiago's here
doesn't mean we love you less,
857
00:38:47,677 --> 00:38:49,426
and just because he's different
858
00:38:49,510 --> 00:38:50,944
doesn't mean that
we're gonna get rid of him.
859
00:38:50,968 --> 00:38:52,259
- V.
- Yeah?
860
00:38:52,343 --> 00:38:54,343
- Look who it is.
- Hi.
861
00:38:54,426 --> 00:38:55,468
Martina!
862
00:38:55,551 --> 00:38:56,551
Santiago!
863
00:39:10,593 --> 00:39:11,927
Only 30 seconds left.
864
00:39:12,009 --> 00:39:14,093
What the hell was that?
865
00:39:14,176 --> 00:39:16,093
Smacking me with
a two by four out there?
866
00:39:16,176 --> 00:39:17,885
That's the way
we're gonna play this thing?
867
00:39:17,968 --> 00:39:20,843
All's fair in love
and hobo wars, Frank.
868
00:39:22,301 --> 00:39:24,468
Gauntlet thrown, my friend.
869
00:39:28,593 --> 00:39:30,426
Just got off the phone
with the client.
870
00:39:30,510 --> 00:39:32,301
Four Greek councils
have signed deals
871
00:39:32,385 --> 00:39:34,194
to make Hobo Loco their
featured alcoholic beverage
872
00:39:34,218 --> 00:39:35,802
at all their fraternity parties.
873
00:39:35,885 --> 00:39:37,718
We're blowing up.
874
00:39:37,802 --> 00:39:39,235
The Insta' Story I just posted
less than an hour ago
875
00:39:39,259 --> 00:39:40,677
already has 100,000 viewers.
876
00:39:43,885 --> 00:39:45,426
Sorry, Victor.
877
00:39:45,510 --> 00:39:47,093
You've been eliminated.
878
00:39:47,176 --> 00:39:48,718
And then there were 19.
879
00:39:48,802 --> 00:39:50,843
Cardboard amateur.
880
00:39:50,927 --> 00:39:51,927
Bubble wrap.
881
00:39:51,968 --> 00:39:53,093
Nice touch, Frank.
882
00:39:55,468 --> 00:39:58,510
Ooh, but not as clever
as insulation and tarp!
883
00:39:58,593 --> 00:40:00,259
- Ha!
- You are the winner
884
00:40:00,343 --> 00:40:02,134
- of this challenge, Mikey O.
- Yeah!
885
00:40:04,551 --> 00:40:05,611
All right, let's get out there
886
00:40:05,635 --> 00:40:07,635
for our next challenge
887
00:40:07,718 --> 00:40:10,259
Dumpster diving for your dinner.
888
00:40:10,343 --> 00:40:12,635
Who thinks they can bring back
the best meal?
889
00:40:12,718 --> 00:40:14,301
- I can!
- Well, let's see!
890
00:40:14,385 --> 00:40:15,968
Whoo! Go! Go! Go!
891
00:40:16,051 --> 00:40:17,677
- Whoo!
- One hour! Let's go!
892
00:40:17,760 --> 00:40:19,802
Don't forget to share
your Hobo Loco
893
00:40:19,885 --> 00:40:21,760
on social media!
894
00:40:24,134 --> 00:40:25,319
We're gonna make
the American hobo
895
00:40:25,343 --> 00:40:27,593
as famous as Joe Camel.
896
00:40:48,927 --> 00:40:51,259
You did good, coming here.
897
00:40:51,343 --> 00:40:53,593
You know, Lip's a smart guy.
898
00:40:53,677 --> 00:40:55,593
I like him.
899
00:40:55,677 --> 00:40:58,343
He'll figure this out.
900
00:40:58,426 --> 00:41:00,009
Yeah.
901
00:41:00,093 --> 00:41:02,510
But you can't be hanging out
at truck stops, right?
902
00:41:02,593 --> 00:41:04,385
It's a lot of creepy people
out there.
903
00:41:06,093 --> 00:41:08,385
Look, if I saw...
904
00:41:08,468 --> 00:41:10,718
If I saw a little girl
on the street alone,
905
00:41:10,802 --> 00:41:12,885
I would want to protect her,
906
00:41:12,968 --> 00:41:15,426
make sure she was safe,
907
00:41:15,510 --> 00:41:17,027
but there are
some bad people out there
908
00:41:17,051 --> 00:41:18,802
who'd want to hurt her,
909
00:41:18,885 --> 00:41:20,718
maybe say stuff
910
00:41:20,802 --> 00:41:23,343
or do stuff to her.
911
00:41:23,426 --> 00:41:25,259
If that ever happened,
912
00:41:25,343 --> 00:41:26,760
you can tell me about it.
913
00:41:28,760 --> 00:41:31,301
Hey, I'd listen to anything
you have to say,
914
00:41:31,385 --> 00:41:33,259
try and make you feel better,
915
00:41:33,343 --> 00:41:35,510
or maybe even beat the shit
out of that person.
916
00:41:35,593 --> 00:41:36,843
I don't know.
917
00:41:40,009 --> 00:41:41,259
Come on.
918
00:41:41,343 --> 00:41:42,383
Let's go raid Lip's closet
919
00:41:42,426 --> 00:41:43,866
and find you
something clean to wear.
920
00:41:45,093 --> 00:41:46,635
No, Sally, I didn't say
921
00:41:46,718 --> 00:41:49,051
that you were responsible
for Lou not remembering
922
00:41:49,134 --> 00:41:51,301
your birthday.
923
00:41:51,385 --> 00:41:53,259
I said you were responsible
924
00:41:53,343 --> 00:41:54,551
for the way you reacted
925
00:41:54,635 --> 00:41:56,551
to Lou not remembering
your birthday.
926
00:41:56,635 --> 00:41:59,009
Guess who just got
fucking fired!
927
00:42:00,635 --> 00:42:02,385
Are you shushing me
in my own house?
928
00:42:02,468 --> 00:42:03,885
She's doing
a phone therapy session
929
00:42:03,968 --> 00:42:05,385
with her client Sally.
930
00:42:05,468 --> 00:42:07,635
Hey, Sally.
931
00:42:07,718 --> 00:42:10,677
Sally, I got all the therapy
you could ever need right here!
932
00:42:10,760 --> 00:42:12,176
- Sorry, Sally...
- What happened?
933
00:42:12,259 --> 00:42:13,635
Why'd you get fired?
934
00:42:13,718 --> 00:42:15,802
Bullshit this, bullshit that,
935
00:42:15,885 --> 00:42:17,635
blah, blah, blah.
936
00:42:18,510 --> 00:42:19,927
So what's your plan now?
937
00:42:20,009 --> 00:42:21,609
Gonna hang around here,
drinking all day?
938
00:42:23,051 --> 00:42:25,635
No, I-I might eat something too.
939
00:42:25,718 --> 00:42:27,843
What about money?
940
00:42:27,927 --> 00:42:30,385
Could you stop whining about
money for two seconds, maybe?
941
00:42:34,301 --> 00:42:37,426
Brought some popcorn shrimp
back from my shitty-ass job.
942
00:42:37,510 --> 00:42:39,635
- Yum.
- I'm turning the furnace on.
943
00:42:39,718 --> 00:42:41,468
Gotta check
for carbon monoxide leaks.
944
00:42:44,134 --> 00:42:46,009
You need a job, Fiona.
945
00:42:59,343 --> 00:43:01,259
What the hell?
946
00:43:26,593 --> 00:43:28,426
No! Shit!
947
00:43:30,301 --> 00:43:31,885
Come on.
948
00:43:38,009 --> 00:43:38,885
Fuck.
949
00:43:38,968 --> 00:43:40,259
Help!
950
00:43:40,343 --> 00:43:41,718
I'm stuck down here!
951
00:43:41,802 --> 00:43:44,259
I'm coming. I'm coming.
952
00:43:45,760 --> 00:43:47,718
I said I'm coming!
953
00:43:47,802 --> 00:43:49,194
So, what I'm hearing
you say, Sally,
954
00:43:49,218 --> 00:43:51,593
is that even though
you're still mad at Lou,
955
00:43:51,677 --> 00:43:54,051
you are willing to focus
on the good things he does.
956
00:43:54,134 --> 00:43:56,677
Sally, your therapist
is having a tea party
957
00:43:56,760 --> 00:43:58,093
with stuffed animals.
958
00:43:58,176 --> 00:43:59,927
Door's open.
959
00:44:00,009 --> 00:44:01,259
Yeah?
960
00:44:01,343 --> 00:44:02,718
We're looking for Ingrid.
961
00:44:02,802 --> 00:44:04,677
I'm her ex-husband.
This is Dr. Kwan...
962
00:44:04,760 --> 00:44:05,985
I don't give a fuck who you are.
963
00:44:06,009 --> 00:44:07,093
She's right here.
964
00:44:09,677 --> 00:44:10,802
Yeah, you know, Sally,
965
00:44:10,885 --> 00:44:12,301
we will have
to continue this later
966
00:44:12,385 --> 00:44:14,134
same time next week.
967
00:44:17,802 --> 00:44:20,468
I cannot believe
that you betrayed me
968
00:44:20,551 --> 00:44:22,093
and brought her here.
969
00:44:22,176 --> 00:44:23,927
Ingrid, Dr. Kwan explained to me
970
00:44:24,009 --> 00:44:25,927
that you will bleed out and die
971
00:44:26,009 --> 00:44:27,760
if you carry six babies to term.
972
00:44:27,843 --> 00:44:30,635
Then why did you implant
all those embryos in me?
973
00:44:30,718 --> 00:44:32,235
Because there was only
a five percent chance
974
00:44:32,259 --> 00:44:34,134
of any of them
surviving implantation
975
00:44:34,218 --> 00:44:36,009
in your shriveled-up uterus.
976
00:44:36,093 --> 00:44:38,218
So what you're saying is,
I'm a medical miracle?
977
00:44:38,301 --> 00:44:39,802
You'll be a medical tragedy
978
00:44:39,885 --> 00:44:41,802
if you carry all six
of those fetuses to term.
979
00:44:41,885 --> 00:44:43,968
I am willing to take my chances.
980
00:44:44,051 --> 00:44:45,486
Ingrid, we are gonna go
to Dr. Kwan's office.
981
00:44:45,510 --> 00:44:47,176
- No.
- She is gonna do
982
00:44:47,259 --> 00:44:48,093
- the procedure, and then...
- No, no, no, no.
983
00:44:48,176 --> 00:44:49,343
I will take you home.
984
00:44:49,426 --> 00:44:50,968
No! Get out of my house!
985
00:44:51,051 --> 00:44:53,218
Bitch, if you don't come
to my office right now,
986
00:44:53,301 --> 00:44:55,843
I will go North Korean on you
and reach into your vagina
987
00:44:55,927 --> 00:44:58,176
and rip those embryos
out of you with my bare hands!
988
00:44:58,259 --> 00:45:00,218
Doctor, please!
989
00:45:00,301 --> 00:45:02,259
She is trying to kill my babies!
990
00:45:04,259 --> 00:45:06,176
Ingrid?
991
00:45:07,426 --> 00:45:09,134
Ingrid? Crap.
992
00:45:09,218 --> 00:45:10,301
Ingy.
993
00:45:12,510 --> 00:45:15,009
Ingrid? Open this door!
994
00:45:15,093 --> 00:45:16,927
- Please.
- Hello?
995
00:45:17,009 --> 00:45:18,510
- Is somebody down here?
- Please!
996
00:45:18,593 --> 00:45:19,718
- I'm trapped!
- Ingrid.
997
00:45:19,802 --> 00:45:22,218
Well, we all feel trapped
at some point.
998
00:45:22,301 --> 00:45:24,051
Do you want to talk about it?
999
00:45:24,134 --> 00:45:26,885
No, you crazy bitch!
It's Debbie!
1000
00:45:26,968 --> 00:45:29,426
I need to get out of here
and turn off the gas
1001
00:45:29,510 --> 00:45:30,843
before the house blows up!
1002
00:45:30,927 --> 00:45:33,176
Debbie?
1003
00:45:33,259 --> 00:45:34,009
Debbie?
1004
00:45:34,093 --> 00:45:35,176
Help!
1005
00:45:35,259 --> 00:45:37,301
Help!
1006
00:45:37,385 --> 00:45:38,968
Somebody help!
1007
00:45:39,051 --> 00:45:40,218
Debbie?
1008
00:45:40,301 --> 00:45:41,301
Kelly?
1009
00:45:45,134 --> 00:45:46,301
My pants are stuck.
1010
00:45:46,385 --> 00:45:47,885
Can you take them off?
1011
00:45:47,968 --> 00:45:48,843
What?
1012
00:45:48,927 --> 00:45:51,385
Just take off your pants!
1013
00:46:08,968 --> 00:46:10,218
My God.
1014
00:46:15,635 --> 00:46:17,218
Nice ass.
1015
00:46:18,927 --> 00:46:20,218
Let's get that gas turned off.
1016
00:46:29,677 --> 00:46:32,343
Thank you for dinner,
fancy French restaurant.
1017
00:46:32,426 --> 00:46:34,051
Yeah!
1018
00:46:34,134 --> 00:46:36,385
Any escargots in here?
1019
00:46:39,343 --> 00:46:40,426
Whoa! Hey!
1020
00:46:40,510 --> 00:46:42,635
Come on! Hey!
1021
00:46:42,718 --> 00:46:45,885
All's fair, Mikey O. All's fair.
1022
00:46:45,968 --> 00:46:47,426
Come on, now!
1023
00:46:47,510 --> 00:46:49,927
Come on! Aww!
1024
00:47:01,134 --> 00:47:02,885
What's going on, fellas?
1025
00:47:02,968 --> 00:47:04,718
Nothing. Just selling lemonade.
1026
00:47:04,802 --> 00:47:06,677
Neighbor said
there was a disturbance.
1027
00:47:06,760 --> 00:47:08,027
Yeah, Officer, I called.
That was me.
1028
00:47:08,051 --> 00:47:09,385
Seems to be the problem?
1029
00:47:09,468 --> 00:47:11,218
These kids are up to no good.
1030
00:47:11,301 --> 00:47:12,819
They are making
way too much noise, okay?
1031
00:47:12,843 --> 00:47:14,593
They are getting water
on my car.
1032
00:47:14,677 --> 00:47:16,301
Noise? That's Tyler the Creator.
1033
00:47:16,385 --> 00:47:17,510
They don't belong here, sir.
1034
00:47:17,593 --> 00:47:19,176
We live two streets over.
1035
00:47:19,259 --> 00:47:20,718
Well, I mean,
do you have a-a permit
1036
00:47:20,802 --> 00:47:21,861
to operate a food stand
in front of my house?
1037
00:47:21,885 --> 00:47:23,301
Ask them, sir. Do they?
1038
00:47:23,385 --> 00:47:24,885
You need a permit
to sell lemonade?
1039
00:47:28,635 --> 00:47:31,009
Eighty-three-ten will respond.
1040
00:47:31,093 --> 00:47:33,009
Move the lemonade stand
down the street
1041
00:47:33,093 --> 00:47:34,343
and turn down the music.
1042
00:47:34,426 --> 00:47:35,760
Wait, sir, that's it?
1043
00:47:35,843 --> 00:47:37,301
What do you want me to do, lady?
1044
00:47:37,385 --> 00:47:38,885
Shut them down.
1045
00:47:38,968 --> 00:47:40,551
I just got my car washed.
1046
00:47:42,677 --> 00:47:44,593
You know what?
1047
00:47:44,677 --> 00:47:46,027
Looks like y'all made
enough money.
1048
00:47:46,051 --> 00:47:47,235
Why don't you close up shop
for the day?
1049
00:47:47,259 --> 00:47:48,718
What? Why?
1050
00:47:50,051 --> 00:47:51,551
Just do it.
1051
00:47:51,635 --> 00:47:53,718
It's not worth the aggravation.
1052
00:47:53,802 --> 00:47:54,885
Here's 20 bucks.
1053
00:47:56,468 --> 00:47:58,343
Get yourself a permit.
1054
00:48:05,385 --> 00:48:07,593
Well, you heard the man.
Shut the shit down.
1055
00:48:35,218 --> 00:48:37,259
This is great.
1056
00:48:37,343 --> 00:48:40,885
Big family dinner.
This is exactly what I wanted.
1057
00:48:40,968 --> 00:48:43,134
Are you enjoying
the food, Martina?
1058
00:48:43,218 --> 00:48:45,385
Better than what they had
in the holding cell.
1059
00:48:46,968 --> 00:48:48,551
I am so sorry
they put you there.
1060
00:48:48,635 --> 00:48:51,718
This is not what America's
normally like.
1061
00:48:51,802 --> 00:48:52,819
I thought you were
supposed to be
1062
00:48:52,843 --> 00:48:54,385
the greatest country
in the world.
1063
00:48:55,510 --> 00:48:57,385
You caught us at a bad time.
1064
00:49:06,718 --> 00:49:09,343
Hey, what do you say we, um,
finish up dinner
1065
00:49:09,426 --> 00:49:11,051
and watch some TV?
1066
00:49:11,134 --> 00:49:13,593
You guys have Pawn Stars
in Guatemala?
1067
00:49:16,885 --> 00:49:19,259
We cannot stay after dinner.
1068
00:49:19,343 --> 00:49:20,635
We have to go back.
1069
00:49:21,843 --> 00:49:24,176
Back? To the detention center?
1070
00:49:24,259 --> 00:49:25,927
To Guatemala.
1071
00:49:26,009 --> 00:49:27,677
We go tonight with our uncle.
1072
00:49:27,760 --> 00:49:28,927
Your uncle?
1073
00:49:29,009 --> 00:49:30,385
Jose Gomez?
1074
00:49:31,968 --> 00:49:34,051
Our father was deported,
so we have to go back
1075
00:49:34,134 --> 00:49:35,259
to be with him.
1076
00:49:35,343 --> 00:49:37,968
Deported? I'm so sorry.
1077
00:49:38,051 --> 00:49:40,677
Sí. Thank you for
1078
00:49:40,760 --> 00:49:42,635
offering to foster us,
1079
00:49:42,718 --> 00:49:45,093
but your country no longer wants
1080
00:49:45,176 --> 00:49:48,093
the tired and poor,
yearning to be free,
1081
00:49:48,176 --> 00:49:51,426
like the big green lady
in the New York Harbor says.
1082
00:49:51,510 --> 00:49:52,718
Big green lady?
1083
00:49:52,802 --> 00:49:54,176
Statue of Liberty.
1084
00:50:02,343 --> 00:50:04,885
She's been napping a long time.
1085
00:50:04,968 --> 00:50:06,760
Probably hasn't slept in days.
1086
00:50:07,635 --> 00:50:09,426
Yeah, you know,
you can go if you want.
1087
00:50:10,385 --> 00:50:11,677
Are you giving me permission?
1088
00:50:11,760 --> 00:50:12,426
No.
1089
00:50:12,510 --> 00:50:14,927
No, I just mean
1090
00:50:15,009 --> 00:50:17,093
if this is too much
to deal with,
1091
00:50:17,176 --> 00:50:18,259
you know, I understand.
1092
00:50:18,343 --> 00:50:19,385
You really think I do
1093
00:50:19,468 --> 00:50:20,718
anything I don't want to do?
1094
00:50:24,885 --> 00:50:28,009
No, probably not.
1095
00:50:28,093 --> 00:50:29,385
Damn right.
1096
00:50:38,968 --> 00:50:40,677
Got you. Yes.
1097
00:50:42,551 --> 00:50:44,259
Hi.
1098
00:50:44,343 --> 00:50:45,927
Hey, buddy. What's up?
1099
00:50:46,009 --> 00:50:47,385
Some lady called the cops on me.
1100
00:50:47,468 --> 00:50:49,301
What'd you do?
1101
00:50:49,385 --> 00:50:51,194
Nothing, just selling lemonade
in front of her house.
1102
00:50:51,218 --> 00:50:54,134
Said we got water
on her fancy car.
1103
00:51:00,134 --> 00:51:01,593
What lady?
1104
00:51:01,677 --> 00:51:02,968
Over on Bundy.
1105
00:51:03,051 --> 00:51:04,444
The one who bought
Mr. Reeback's house
1106
00:51:04,468 --> 00:51:05,468
and redid it?
1107
00:51:07,635 --> 00:51:08,802
Who were you with?
1108
00:51:08,885 --> 00:51:09,885
Some friends from school,
1109
00:51:09,968 --> 00:51:11,385
Todd and De-shawn.
1110
00:51:11,468 --> 00:51:12,760
Black kids?
1111
00:51:12,843 --> 00:51:14,677
Yeah.
1112
00:51:14,760 --> 00:51:16,510
Motherfucker.
1113
00:51:18,802 --> 00:51:20,093
Yo!
1114
00:51:26,218 --> 00:51:28,551
We're not gonna eat
this stuff, right?
1115
00:51:28,635 --> 00:51:29,927
No, hell no.
1116
00:51:30,009 --> 00:51:31,468
We're gonna Fear Factor
this shit.
1117
00:51:31,551 --> 00:51:32,593
I made it!
1118
00:51:32,677 --> 00:51:33,551
I made it.
1119
00:51:33,635 --> 00:51:36,093
Shit. Damn it.
1120
00:51:38,301 --> 00:51:40,593
Can't keep this player
from the game, Frank.
1121
00:51:40,677 --> 00:51:41,677
How did you get out?
1122
00:51:41,760 --> 00:51:43,510
Garbage truck came by.
1123
00:51:43,593 --> 00:51:45,635
Dumped me in the back.
It was rough,
1124
00:51:45,718 --> 00:51:47,635
but a pile of old Big Macs
broke my fall.
1125
00:51:47,718 --> 00:51:49,218
All right, welcome back.
1126
00:51:49,301 --> 00:51:50,760
We'll now go around
and take our pick
1127
00:51:50,843 --> 00:51:54,134
for the dumpster dive
competition.
1128
00:51:55,468 --> 00:51:56,635
Sushi?
1129
00:51:56,718 --> 00:51:57,885
Brave choice.
1130
00:52:23,176 --> 00:52:24,635
Hey!
1131
00:52:24,718 --> 00:52:27,259
You know that new bitch
over on Bundy?
1132
00:52:27,343 --> 00:52:28,760
Yeah, she pulled
some racist shit
1133
00:52:28,843 --> 00:52:30,134
on my brother Liam,
1134
00:52:30,218 --> 00:52:31,843
so block party. Come on.
1135
00:52:38,176 --> 00:52:40,134
Hey, Mr. Jackson. We're throwing
1136
00:52:40,218 --> 00:52:42,259
a new racist neighbor
a welcome party.
1137
00:52:42,343 --> 00:52:43,718
Bring your pit bull.
1138
00:52:43,802 --> 00:52:45,468
Come on, boy. Let's go.
1139
00:53:00,009 --> 00:53:01,593
Welcome to the South Side,
bitch!
1140
00:53:08,593 --> 00:53:10,927
You sure you want to do this?
1141
00:53:11,009 --> 00:53:13,051
Sí.
1142
00:53:27,551 --> 00:53:30,385
Speaking Spanish.
1143
00:53:50,176 --> 00:53:52,927
I have no idea what he said.
1144
00:53:53,009 --> 00:53:55,259
It was good. He smiled.
1145
00:53:58,593 --> 00:54:00,885
There goes my son.
1146
00:54:08,051 --> 00:54:10,218
I have called the police.
1147
00:54:11,843 --> 00:54:14,718
They are on their way.
1148
00:54:14,802 --> 00:54:17,218
You are disturbing the peace.
1149
00:54:17,301 --> 00:54:19,343
Hey, lady.
1150
00:54:19,426 --> 00:54:21,927
That was my brother
with the lemonade stand.
1151
00:54:22,009 --> 00:54:23,677
- What?
- That's right.
1152
00:54:23,760 --> 00:54:24,927
I got a black brother.
1153
00:54:27,635 --> 00:54:29,343
What?
That's why you didn't want him
1154
00:54:29,426 --> 00:54:31,093
near your house, right?
1155
00:54:31,176 --> 00:54:33,426
'Cause he's black?
1156
00:54:33,510 --> 00:54:36,134
Okay, you need to go home.
1157
00:54:36,218 --> 00:54:38,176
Some of us have jobs.
1158
00:54:38,259 --> 00:54:39,486
You know, I lived
in this neighborhood
1159
00:54:39,510 --> 00:54:42,093
my whole life.
1160
00:54:42,176 --> 00:54:45,968
Kids have always
sold lemonade right here.
1161
00:54:46,051 --> 00:54:48,927
Black kids, white kids,
1162
00:54:49,009 --> 00:54:51,385
Russian kids, Mexican kids.
1163
00:54:51,468 --> 00:54:54,093
Would you get away
from my fence?
1164
00:54:54,176 --> 00:54:58,802
Nobody ever had a problem
with lemonade stands
1165
00:54:58,885 --> 00:55:02,259
until all of you bougie,
1166
00:55:02,343 --> 00:55:04,259
yoga-loving,
1167
00:55:04,343 --> 00:55:06,426
latte-sipping,
1168
00:55:06,510 --> 00:55:11,301
ankle tattoo-wearing,
racist assholes
1169
00:55:11,385 --> 00:55:13,677
moved into our neighborhood,
so your fence?
1170
00:55:14,885 --> 00:55:16,760
Fuck your fence.
1171
00:55:26,843 --> 00:55:29,009
Shit!
1172
00:55:29,093 --> 00:55:30,093
Hey!
1173
00:56:14,301 --> 00:56:16,677
Video of the food challenge
went viral.
1174
00:56:16,760 --> 00:56:18,677
Over 400,000 views.
1175
00:56:18,760 --> 00:56:22,051
People are doing something
called the "Hobo Dragon."
1176
00:56:26,593 --> 00:56:30,301
We are totally getting
promoted after this.
1177
00:56:30,385 --> 00:56:32,301
Another
alcohol poisoning inside?
1178
00:56:32,385 --> 00:56:34,093
Yeah, fourth one today.
74124
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