Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,961 --> 00:00:06,298
♪ The Simpsons ♪
2
00:00:09,134 --> 00:00:10,135
[Bart] This is it, Bart.
3
00:00:10,219 --> 00:00:11,386
If you strike Uter out,
4
00:00:11,470 --> 00:00:14,139
the team gets a pizza party
and you'll die a legend.
5
00:00:14,223 --> 00:00:16,725
Lose and we just get the pizza party.
6
00:00:19,478 --> 00:00:23,982
I've seen better batters
at the International House of Pancakes.
7
00:00:24,066 --> 00:00:27,236
This is a children's game,
Herr Comic Book Mensch.
8
00:00:27,319 --> 00:00:28,362
And?
9
00:00:28,445 --> 00:00:31,865
Und das ist mein son
that you are trash-en talk-en.
10
00:00:31,949 --> 00:00:34,535
Your son? Oh, dear. If I had known--
11
00:00:35,410 --> 00:00:37,913
Send this eunuch back to Munich!
12
00:00:37,996 --> 00:00:39,706
Blitzkrieg!
13
00:00:39,790 --> 00:00:42,501
-[grunts] Ow, ow, ow!
-[spectators gasp]
14
00:00:42,584 --> 00:00:45,170
-[Comic Book Guy screams]
-[all cheering]
15
00:00:45,254 --> 00:00:49,174
It only took 200 years,
but baseball finally got interesting.
16
00:00:49,258 --> 00:00:50,717
Hey! [exclaims]
17
00:00:50,801 --> 00:00:52,386
[all grunting]
18
00:00:52,469 --> 00:00:55,347
[mutters in German, grunts]
19
00:00:55,430 --> 00:00:58,183
Dang, that dude's a certified badass.
20
00:00:58,267 --> 00:01:03,230
-[scoffs] Our dad could take him.
-He teaches Brazilian jujitsu on Zoom.
21
00:01:03,313 --> 00:01:05,983
My dad does security for James Corden.
22
00:01:06,066 --> 00:01:08,860
You know how many people
wanna punch James Corden?
23
00:01:08,944 --> 00:01:10,654
Well, my dad's a badass too.
24
00:01:10,737 --> 00:01:15,617
I bet he could kill everyone in town
through workplace incompetence.
25
00:01:15,701 --> 00:01:20,372
[giggles] Oh, Bart, "dumbass" is
not synonymous with "badass."
26
00:01:20,455 --> 00:01:22,082
[laughing]
27
00:01:22,165 --> 00:01:24,543
Oh, yeah? Well, what does your dad do?
28
00:01:24,626 --> 00:01:27,921
Executes inmates via lethal injection.
29
00:01:28,005 --> 00:01:29,756
-Wow.
-Wow.
30
00:01:29,840 --> 00:01:30,966
Ha ha!
31
00:01:31,049 --> 00:01:33,635
My dad is tough, right?
32
00:01:33,719 --> 00:01:36,179
[screams] Please don't hurt me.
Just take my money.
33
00:01:36,263 --> 00:01:37,264
[goose honks]
34
00:01:37,347 --> 00:01:39,474
If that's not enough, we can go to an ATM.
35
00:01:39,558 --> 00:01:41,101
-[Homer whimpers]
-Mmm.
36
00:01:44,187 --> 00:01:47,316
Hey, slugger. Whatcha watching, the game?
37
00:01:47,399 --> 00:01:49,818
Shh. Great Masked British Bake Off.
38
00:01:49,901 --> 00:01:52,863
[Homer] I think Nurse Shark
is Nancy Pelosi.
39
00:01:53,864 --> 00:01:55,115
[groans]
40
00:01:55,198 --> 00:01:59,369
Hey, I got tickets to tonight's MMA fight.
Should be pretty badass.
41
00:01:59,453 --> 00:02:02,456
Uh, why don't you take Lisa?
She could use some toughening up.
42
00:02:02,539 --> 00:02:06,043
Homer, either bond with your son
or help me fold this laundry.
43
00:02:06,793 --> 00:02:07,794
[Homer] Hmm.
44
00:02:08,587 --> 00:02:09,588
Hmm.
45
00:02:10,339 --> 00:02:11,340
Hmm.
46
00:02:12,257 --> 00:02:13,592
Ugh! Fine.
47
00:02:13,675 --> 00:02:19,056
[MMA announcer] Springfield Brawliseum,
are you ready to fist?
48
00:02:19,139 --> 00:02:20,474
[crowd cheering]
49
00:02:20,557 --> 00:02:22,851
Celebrities with us at ringside tonight,
50
00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:28,398
retired heavyweight champ
and CTE denier, Drederick Tatum.
51
00:02:28,482 --> 00:02:32,069
Aviator and man about town, Arnie Pye.
52
00:02:32,152 --> 00:02:33,445
And Latin TV star
53
00:02:33,528 --> 00:02:39,368
and owner of tonight's sponsor,
Ay, Mi Cabeza mezcal, Bumblebee Man.
54
00:02:39,451 --> 00:02:40,577
[crowd cheering]
55
00:02:40,661 --> 00:02:47,542
But first, it's time to scour the crowd
for our most macho fan.
56
00:02:47,626 --> 00:02:49,211
Is it this guy?
57
00:02:49,294 --> 00:02:50,921
-[grunting]
-[crowd cheers]
58
00:02:51,004 --> 00:02:52,881
[MMA announcer] How about this dude?
59
00:02:52,964 --> 00:02:54,341
[screams]
60
00:02:54,424 --> 00:02:56,635
[grunting]
61
00:02:56,718 --> 00:02:58,095
[crowd cheering]
62
00:02:58,762 --> 00:03:01,848
[MMA announcer] Or is it him?
63
00:03:01,932 --> 00:03:03,600
[crowd booing]
64
00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:06,311
[gasps] Look, sweetie.
We're on the kiss cam.
65
00:03:07,979 --> 00:03:12,067
-Stop, Dad. You're embarrassing me.
-What the hell's your problem?
66
00:03:12,150 --> 00:03:13,485
My problem?
67
00:03:13,568 --> 00:03:14,861
[grunts]
68
00:03:14,945 --> 00:03:16,863
I have the wussiest dad in town!
69
00:03:16,947 --> 00:03:18,031
[gasps] Wuss?
70
00:03:18,115 --> 00:03:19,408
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa. [stammers]
71
00:03:19,491 --> 00:03:21,535
D'oh! Son of a…
72
00:03:21,618 --> 00:03:23,537
[grunts] D'oh! [yelps]
73
00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:25,997
Hey, Carl. Your shoelace is untied.
74
00:03:26,081 --> 00:03:27,582
So's yours.
75
00:03:27,666 --> 00:03:28,959
-Crisscross.
-Crisscross.
76
00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:30,043
-[Homer screams]
-Whoa.
77
00:03:30,127 --> 00:03:31,294
[screaming]
78
00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:33,713
-[grunting]
-[pounding]
79
00:03:33,797 --> 00:03:35,549
[screaming] D'oh!
80
00:03:35,632 --> 00:03:37,134
[screaming]
81
00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:38,385
-[thuds]
-[Homer groans]
82
00:03:38,468 --> 00:03:39,469
[spectators gasp]
83
00:03:40,178 --> 00:03:42,848
The winner is Cotton Candy Fatso.
84
00:03:43,348 --> 00:03:44,516
[crowd laughing, cheering]
85
00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:46,184
That was impressive!
86
00:03:46,268 --> 00:03:47,269
[gasps]
87
00:03:48,270 --> 00:03:49,354
Dad, Dad.
88
00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:51,690
Please don't cry on pay-per-view.
89
00:03:51,773 --> 00:03:53,358
Señor Fatso.
90
00:03:53,442 --> 00:03:57,195
That was the most hilarious fall
I've ever seen in my life.
91
00:03:57,279 --> 00:04:00,574
The antics, the physics,
the annoyed grunts.
92
00:04:00,657 --> 00:04:03,827
Sir, I would like to buy you a drink.
93
00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:06,496
Throw in a food and you got a deal.
94
00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:12,419
Wow! The Bumblebee Man.
You're a Springfield legend, dude.
95
00:04:12,502 --> 00:04:15,839
Like Krusty, or Duffman,
or the Tiki Bar Strangler.
96
00:04:15,922 --> 00:04:20,427
[chuckles] You flatter me, young man.
And, please, call me Pedro.
97
00:04:20,510 --> 00:04:24,848
I didn't know you, uh, yacht rock types
watch my show.
98
00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:26,892
Are you kidding? I don't know Spanish,
99
00:04:26,975 --> 00:04:29,186
but when you get kicked
in the junk by a nun,
100
00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:32,689
you speak
the international language of crotch.
101
00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:34,316
[chuckles] Believe it or not,
102
00:04:34,399 --> 00:04:37,194
I didn't set out
to be a physical comedian.
103
00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:42,699
I left Mexico with dreams
of being a serious actor in Hollywood.
104
00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:46,578
[Bumblebee Man] Unfortunately,
I was brought to the wrong sign
105
00:04:46,661 --> 00:04:49,289
by a stupid money-hungry coyote.
106
00:04:49,372 --> 00:04:53,168
[sighs] It was the worst day of my life.
107
00:04:53,710 --> 00:04:59,382
Then I came upon a grand opening
for a new Spanish-language TV station.
108
00:04:59,466 --> 00:05:01,468
It was the best day of my life.
109
00:05:01,551 --> 00:05:04,679
I ran in, destined to become a star
110
00:05:04,763 --> 00:05:09,226
no matter how long it took
or what I had to do to get there.
111
00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:11,812
[grunting]
112
00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:14,564
[screams, groans]
113
00:05:14,648 --> 00:05:15,857
[screaming]
114
00:05:15,941 --> 00:05:18,235
[speaking Spanish]
115
00:05:19,486 --> 00:05:20,570
[screaming]
116
00:05:22,697 --> 00:05:26,952
[screams, groans]
117
00:05:27,035 --> 00:05:28,453
[screaming]
118
00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:30,205
[grunts]
119
00:05:30,288 --> 00:05:31,957
Mmm? [whimpers]
120
00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:33,375
[speaking Spanish]
121
00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:36,127
[in Spanish] Life is ironic and cruel!
122
00:05:36,211 --> 00:05:38,463
[laughing]
123
00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:41,883
[in English]
You, sir, are going to be a star.
124
00:05:41,967 --> 00:05:42,926
[gasps]
125
00:05:43,009 --> 00:05:45,011
[in Spanish] What? I don't speak English!
126
00:05:45,095 --> 00:05:48,098
[in English]
And so, Bumblebee Man was born,
127
00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:51,685
a tragicomic figure cursed by the cosmos,
128
00:05:51,768 --> 00:05:54,604
like Sisyphus or Benny Hill.
129
00:05:55,730 --> 00:06:00,777
No matter what life throws at him,
he always gets up and tries again,
130
00:06:00,861 --> 00:06:04,155
just like the hardworking people
that watch my show.
131
00:06:04,239 --> 00:06:07,617
So, day after day, year after year,
132
00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:11,246
I sacrificed my bumble body
on the altar of comedy.
133
00:06:11,955 --> 00:06:16,334
I thought I was invincible,
like Curly from the Stooges.
134
00:06:17,002 --> 00:06:20,672
But alas, I was just a mortal Shemp.
135
00:06:20,755 --> 00:06:23,633
I suppose time catches up to us all.
136
00:06:24,426 --> 00:06:29,347
Now my tired show limps on
in the shadow of its former glory.
137
00:06:30,181 --> 00:06:33,935
Simpsons, have you any idea
what this is like?
138
00:06:35,812 --> 00:06:37,522
Are you gonna quit?
139
00:06:37,606 --> 00:06:42,944
I was, until I saw your father's
hilarious fall down those steps.
140
00:06:43,028 --> 00:06:45,739
You got up without a scratch.
141
00:06:45,822 --> 00:06:47,032
[gasps] That reminds me.
142
00:06:48,074 --> 00:06:53,538
Homero, would you do me the honor
of becoming my stunt double?
143
00:06:53,622 --> 00:06:57,959
Stunt double? That's the badassiest job
a dad could have.
144
00:06:58,043 --> 00:06:59,252
He'll do it.
145
00:06:59,336 --> 00:07:01,671
-What, are you crazy?
-Think about it, Homer.
146
00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:05,508
You get to crash cars
and have bottles broken over your head.
147
00:07:05,592 --> 00:07:07,969
All the stuff you do now,
but you get paid for it.
148
00:07:08,053 --> 00:07:10,639
You'd be the toughest dad ever. Say yes.
149
00:07:10,722 --> 00:07:13,475
[♪ hopeful music plays]
150
00:07:14,184 --> 00:07:18,647
-You've got yourself a stuntman.
-He said yes!
151
00:07:18,730 --> 00:07:22,776
[♪ mariachi group plays "Wedding March"]
152
00:07:24,861 --> 00:07:26,112
[♪ mariachi music plays]
153
00:07:28,365 --> 00:07:31,785
There's the stuntman
that's going to save my career.
154
00:07:31,868 --> 00:07:34,454
Come in. It is time.
155
00:07:34,537 --> 00:07:36,790
This is no mere costume.
156
00:07:36,873 --> 00:07:40,043
It is the armor of hope,
a beacon of light,
157
00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:45,382
a symbol of truth, justice,
and the Mexican-American güey.
158
00:07:45,465 --> 00:07:49,344
Uh, Homero, you're wearing
the stinger in the front.
159
00:07:49,427 --> 00:07:53,598
[giggles] Whoops. A man can dream.
En garde. Ooh. Eh. Huh.
160
00:07:53,682 --> 00:07:58,019
Before we get started, I must ask you
to sign a nondisclosure agreement,
161
00:07:58,103 --> 00:08:02,524
for my fans would be devastated
to know I'm not doing my own stunts.
162
00:08:02,607 --> 00:08:06,444
No problem, Pedro. I sign tons of NDAs.
163
00:08:06,528 --> 00:08:08,697
In fact, I just signed one at work.
164
00:08:08,780 --> 00:08:12,450
Apparently, our drinking water is
full of radioactive…
165
00:08:12,992 --> 00:08:13,993
nothing.
166
00:08:14,077 --> 00:08:15,078
Mmm.
167
00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:17,038
[speaking Spanish]
168
00:08:18,373 --> 00:08:19,833
[director] Cut! ¡El doble!
169
00:08:24,754 --> 00:08:26,589
You got this, tough guy.
170
00:08:26,673 --> 00:08:27,841
[director] ¡Acción!
171
00:08:27,924 --> 00:08:29,217
Uh. Mmm. Oh.
172
00:08:29,300 --> 00:08:33,179
[gasps, screams] Ow! Ow!
173
00:08:33,263 --> 00:08:35,640
[screaming] Ow!
174
00:08:36,307 --> 00:08:37,308
-[grunts]
-[hisses]
175
00:08:37,392 --> 00:08:38,727
[sighs]
176
00:08:38,810 --> 00:08:40,019
[yelps]
177
00:08:42,230 --> 00:08:43,440
[speaking Spanish]
178
00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:45,483
[in Spanish] I do not like life!
179
00:08:46,651 --> 00:08:48,486
[laughing, cheering]
180
00:08:48,570 --> 00:08:49,571
[speaking Spanish]
181
00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:53,116
-[in English] Wow. Just like the old days.
-That fat güero can take a hit.
182
00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:54,367
-Homer!
-[cheering]
183
00:08:54,451 --> 00:08:55,869
Whoo-hoo!
184
00:08:56,369 --> 00:09:01,332
And then everyone on set high-fived Dad.
Even the non-writing producers.
185
00:09:01,416 --> 00:09:04,127
Ooh! They're a hard bunch to please.
186
00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:06,004
[singsongy] Bart's proud of Dad!
187
00:09:06,087 --> 00:09:07,964
-Bart's proud of Dad!
-[singsongy] Bart's proud of Dad!
188
00:09:08,048 --> 00:09:11,676
Oh, it's true. I can't wait
to tell the kids at school
189
00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:14,721
that my dad is Bumblebee Man's stunt guy.
190
00:09:14,804 --> 00:09:18,600
No dice, boy. That's a secret.
Remember, I signed that MDMA?
191
00:09:18,683 --> 00:09:21,686
Oh, man. What's the use
of having a badass in the family
192
00:09:21,770 --> 00:09:23,188
if you can't brag about him?
193
00:09:23,271 --> 00:09:25,398
Now I know how the Mangiones feel.
194
00:09:25,482 --> 00:09:29,819
Dad, isn't it problematic for a white man
to double for a Mexican actor?
195
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:34,115
The director thought that too,
so he gave me these brown sleeves to wear.
196
00:09:34,199 --> 00:09:36,367
[gasps] But that's Brown face.
197
00:09:36,451 --> 00:09:38,912
No, it's just brown arms and legs.
198
00:09:38,995 --> 00:09:42,165
Besides, with all the ICE
going on these days,
199
00:09:42,248 --> 00:09:45,710
isn't it better to have a white guy suffer
instead of a Mexican guy?
200
00:09:46,211 --> 00:09:47,420
Well, you got me there.
201
00:09:47,504 --> 00:09:49,589
Not too much suffering, right?
202
00:09:49,672 --> 00:09:52,133
'Cause I don't want you
getting badly hurt.
203
00:09:52,217 --> 00:09:56,429
Relax, honey. It's all pies in the face
and slipping on plantain peels.
204
00:09:56,513 --> 00:09:58,014
I'll be fine.
205
00:09:58,098 --> 00:09:59,140
[♪ "Unknown Stuntman" playing]
206
00:09:59,224 --> 00:10:00,809
♪ I might fall from a tall building ♪
207
00:10:00,892 --> 00:10:03,353
♪ I might roll a brand-new car ♪
208
00:10:03,853 --> 00:10:06,439
♪ 'Cause I'm the unknown stuntman ♪
209
00:10:06,523 --> 00:10:08,942
♪ That made Redford such a star ♪
210
00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:19,035
[♪ "Unknown Stuntman" ends]
211
00:10:21,371 --> 00:10:23,123
Look at all these fans.
212
00:10:23,206 --> 00:10:25,750
How come you never ditched TV
and became a movie star,
213
00:10:25,834 --> 00:10:28,294
like all those guys
who regret leaving SNL?
214
00:10:28,378 --> 00:10:32,298
Ah. I once wrote a script
for a Bumblebee Man film.
215
00:10:32,382 --> 00:10:36,970
It was a time travel comedy,
and a love letter to my beloved Mexico.
216
00:10:37,053 --> 00:10:41,683
I sent it to every studio in Hollywood,
but no one understood it.
217
00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:44,227
Maybe I should have written it in English.
218
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:46,312
Bah! What you gonna do?
219
00:10:46,688 --> 00:10:48,982
[in Spanish] Go on. Ask him sweetie.
220
00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:52,152
[in English] Can I smash you over the head
with my crowbar?
221
00:10:52,235 --> 00:10:57,574
Uh, I would love to, but, uh,
it's a union thing.
222
00:10:57,657 --> 00:10:59,826
But you can hit my friend if you'd like.
223
00:10:59,909 --> 00:11:01,035
Huh? D'oh!
224
00:11:02,829 --> 00:11:05,665
Honey, I'm ho… What the hell?
225
00:11:05,748 --> 00:11:08,585
Well, I'm just hugging you.
I'm happy you're home.
226
00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:10,503
-[grunts]
-[Homer whimpers]
227
00:11:10,587 --> 00:11:11,588
Are you crying?
228
00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:15,717
Yes. I've never gotten
an after-work hug from you before.
229
00:11:16,259 --> 00:11:18,344
Also, I have three fractured ribs
on that side.
230
00:11:18,428 --> 00:11:21,139
It sucks not being able
to brag about my dad.
231
00:11:21,222 --> 00:11:24,100
How can you stand not getting credit
for all those awesome stunts?
232
00:11:24,184 --> 00:11:28,938
Hey, who needs credit when you get
after-work hugs from your twin boys?
233
00:11:29,022 --> 00:11:31,357
[distorted]
Did you get a concussion today, Dad?
234
00:11:31,441 --> 00:11:34,027
Maybe. Don't tell your mothers.
235
00:11:36,070 --> 00:11:39,157
Homero, you are one hell of a stuntman.
236
00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:44,078
All in a day's work, amigo.
Yep, anyhoo, I gotta go pee some blood.
237
00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:50,752
Bumblebee Man? Wow!
I am a huge fan. I'm Johnny--
238
00:11:50,835 --> 00:11:54,839
Johnny Knoxville from Jackass.
Of course I know you.
239
00:11:54,923 --> 00:11:59,636
Oh, my goodness. Every great bit
I ever did was because of you.
240
00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:03,181
Power wash enema,
crab Jacuzzi, fire ant facial.
241
00:12:03,264 --> 00:12:04,682
[chuckles] You're too kind.
242
00:12:04,766 --> 00:12:07,518
Tell me, when is
the next Jackass picture coming out?
243
00:12:07,602 --> 00:12:11,314
Oh, I'm done with those, man.
My body just can't take it anymore.
244
00:12:11,397 --> 00:12:13,399
But the studio keeps asking.
245
00:12:13,483 --> 00:12:17,237
They even suggested
I secretly use a stuntman.
246
00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:20,657
[chuckles]
The nerve of those frijole counters.
247
00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:22,325
They don't get guys like us.
248
00:12:22,408 --> 00:12:25,787
We'd rather traumatize a film crew
with our grisly on-set death
249
00:12:25,870 --> 00:12:29,290
than ever let some stuntman
take our hits, right?
250
00:12:29,374 --> 00:12:31,960
Hey, Pedro, they need us back
on set so we can--
251
00:12:32,043 --> 00:12:36,297
Huh. Who's this fella
that's got your exact size and build?
252
00:12:36,381 --> 00:12:41,678
[stutters] This is my trainer.
He keeps me comedically obese.
253
00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:45,515
Hey, you're doing a bang-up job, tubby.
254
00:12:45,598 --> 00:12:49,102
Let's toast. They might have replaced
our knees, shoulders
255
00:12:49,185 --> 00:12:54,315
and, uh, other stuff,
but they can never replace our integrity.
256
00:12:56,317 --> 00:12:57,694
[whimpers]
257
00:12:57,777 --> 00:13:03,074
I am a liar and a fraud.
What was I thinking hiring a stuntman?
258
00:13:03,157 --> 00:13:06,869
You were thinking let someone else
get banged up for a change. That's fine.
259
00:13:06,953 --> 00:13:12,500
No. My audience expects
to see me getting banged hard and often,
260
00:13:12,583 --> 00:13:14,711
and I lied to them.
261
00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:19,132
For what? Ratings? Money?
A stupid Calvin Klein ad?
262
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:21,884
[sobbing]
263
00:13:21,968 --> 00:13:24,762
I'm nothing but a sellout.
264
00:13:24,846 --> 00:13:27,307
Hey, come on now,
don't cry in front of the gringos.
265
00:13:28,725 --> 00:13:33,646
That's it. I'm quitting.
Show business is no place for a phony.
266
00:13:33,730 --> 00:13:38,151
You can't quit now. The show's a hit,
and my son's never been prouder of me.
267
00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:42,989
I'm sorry, Homero. Nothing in the world
can make me change my mind.
268
00:13:43,072 --> 00:13:44,073
Hola, Pedro.
269
00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:49,245
I am Alejandro González Iñárritu,
Oscar-winning director of The Revenant.
270
00:13:49,328 --> 00:13:51,622
[gasps] That movie was so funny.
271
00:13:51,706 --> 00:13:56,002
When that bear ate the boy from Titanic.
272
00:13:56,085 --> 00:13:58,212
[laughs]
273
00:13:58,296 --> 00:13:59,589
Yes, thank you.
274
00:13:59,672 --> 00:14:02,967
I found your old script,
and I must make this film.
275
00:14:03,051 --> 00:14:07,430
You will be the star
of the most action-packed, death-defying,
276
00:14:07,513 --> 00:14:10,099
uninsurable picture ever made.
277
00:14:10,183 --> 00:14:11,559
What do you say?
278
00:14:12,769 --> 00:14:16,814
I say let's make a bee movie!
279
00:14:16,898 --> 00:14:19,275
[♪ mariachi group plays
"Hooray for Hollywood"]
280
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:23,362
[♪ mariachi jingle plays]
281
00:14:23,446 --> 00:14:24,864
[crowd cheering]
282
00:14:24,947 --> 00:14:28,993
It's so nice of Pedro
to let us come along for the filming.
283
00:14:29,077 --> 00:14:31,162
What's this movie about anyway?
284
00:14:31,245 --> 00:14:34,332
Well, if my Spanish is correct, and it is,
285
00:14:34,415 --> 00:14:38,252
it's an epic time travel adventure
about a humble bee man
286
00:14:38,336 --> 00:14:39,670
who gets hilariously hurt
287
00:14:39,754 --> 00:14:42,423
during the most important moments
in Mexican history.
288
00:14:42,507 --> 00:14:44,050
Mark my words!
289
00:14:44,133 --> 00:14:47,470
This action-packed film is
going to make billions,
290
00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:50,431
in Mexican pesos, at the box office,
291
00:14:50,515 --> 00:14:52,100
and do you know why?
292
00:14:52,183 --> 00:14:58,523
Because I'm willing to risk it all.
Brain damage, paralysis, life itself!
293
00:14:58,606 --> 00:15:03,152
You said this was all pies in the face
and slipping on plantain peels.
294
00:15:03,236 --> 00:15:04,612
[chuckles] Don't worry, Marge.
295
00:15:04,695 --> 00:15:07,657
I'm sure something
got lost in translation.
296
00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:09,033
He said it in English.
297
00:15:09,117 --> 00:15:10,159
[speaking Spanish]
298
00:15:10,243 --> 00:15:12,286
Because no matter how dangerous,
299
00:15:12,370 --> 00:15:18,501
Bumblebee Man has always
and will always do his own stunts.
300
00:15:18,584 --> 00:15:23,589
Uh. FYI, I don't do my own stunts.
He does.
301
00:15:23,673 --> 00:15:25,633
That guy with the chili-dusted Popsicle.
302
00:15:26,634 --> 00:15:28,469
Mmm. Sweet.
303
00:15:28,553 --> 00:15:30,346
-[screams] Spicy!
-[exclaiming] What?
304
00:15:30,429 --> 00:15:34,725
You lied to your fans, to your country,
to your own director?
305
00:15:34,809 --> 00:15:35,935
The movie's off!
306
00:15:36,519 --> 00:15:39,522
What if we hide his face
with this green screen mask?
307
00:15:40,106 --> 00:15:41,107
[Homer] Hmm?
308
00:15:41,190 --> 00:15:42,692
The movie's back on!
309
00:15:43,693 --> 00:15:46,779
[Alejandro] We are in Lake Texcoco
thousands of years ago.
310
00:15:46,863 --> 00:15:50,658
Here, Bumblebee Man
will find a symbol from the gods
311
00:15:50,741 --> 00:15:52,827
that will one day
be emblazoned on the flag
312
00:15:52,910 --> 00:15:55,955
and in the heart of every Mexican.
313
00:15:56,706 --> 00:15:58,457
Cue the snake and eagle!
314
00:15:59,542 --> 00:16:01,878
[screams] No! Ow!
315
00:16:01,961 --> 00:16:03,880
No, they're biting me! [screams]
316
00:16:03,963 --> 00:16:06,424
[Alejandro] Cue more snakes
and bigger eagles!
317
00:16:06,924 --> 00:16:08,593
-[snakes hissing]
-[eagles screeching]
318
00:16:08,676 --> 00:16:11,929
[Homer screaming] Get 'em off me!
Too many snakes! [screams]
319
00:16:12,555 --> 00:16:15,683
My childhood dream has come true.
320
00:16:15,766 --> 00:16:17,810
[Homer] There's a snake inside me!
321
00:16:17,894 --> 00:16:19,562
[♪ "Viva México" playing]
322
00:16:27,570 --> 00:16:28,821
[screams, grunts]
323
00:16:29,906 --> 00:16:32,825
[screaming]
324
00:16:33,367 --> 00:16:34,952
-[bell rings]
-[grunts]
325
00:16:35,036 --> 00:16:36,204
[♪ "Viva México" ends]
326
00:16:36,704 --> 00:16:38,122
[gasps] Dad's home!
327
00:16:38,706 --> 00:16:40,583
-[groans]
-[chuckles]
328
00:16:40,666 --> 00:16:42,335
-[yelps]
-[Bart grunts]
329
00:16:42,418 --> 00:16:43,920
-Good Lord!
-[gasps] Dad!
330
00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:46,130
What the hell? You dodged my hug.
331
00:16:46,214 --> 00:16:50,635
Can't hug.
Spent all day getting my Aztec kicked.
332
00:16:50,718 --> 00:16:53,679
Homie, you can't keep doing this.
You have to quit.
333
00:16:53,763 --> 00:16:57,558
The pain pills? No, I need them.
Plus, they're so cheap here.
334
00:16:57,642 --> 00:17:00,978
Why in God's name would you
put yourself through this?
335
00:17:01,062 --> 00:17:05,316
Uh, you're not just doing this
to impress me, are you?
336
00:17:05,399 --> 00:17:09,195
Yes, but there's also
the bromance element.
337
00:17:09,278 --> 00:17:11,656
So many threads.
338
00:17:11,739 --> 00:17:14,325
-[Marge] Mmm.
-[Homer groaning]
339
00:17:15,910 --> 00:17:16,911
[in Spanish] Luz,
340
00:17:16,994 --> 00:17:18,579
there's something you must know…
341
00:17:21,082 --> 00:17:22,917
[in English]
We interrupt Juan Life to Live
342
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:24,835
to bring you this English news bulletin.
343
00:17:24,919 --> 00:17:28,047
Beloved actor and hometown hero
Bumblebee Man has been exposed
344
00:17:28,130 --> 00:17:29,382
for using a stunt double.
345
00:17:29,465 --> 00:17:33,594
Late last night, our station received
this photo from an anonymous source.
346
00:17:34,178 --> 00:17:36,138
Hey, that's the picture Bart took.
347
00:17:36,806 --> 00:17:38,683
[in Spanish, grunting] Why you little…
348
00:17:38,766 --> 00:17:42,144
[in English, chokes] I didn't do it.
349
00:17:42,228 --> 00:17:44,188
[grunts] It wasn't him.
350
00:17:44,272 --> 00:17:45,523
It was me.
351
00:17:45,606 --> 00:17:47,608
It was? I thought I did it.
352
00:17:47,692 --> 00:17:49,026
I guess we both did it?
353
00:17:49,110 --> 00:17:51,112
I was lying a second ago. I also did it.
354
00:17:51,195 --> 00:17:53,948
-Why, you little… [grunts]
-[choking]
355
00:17:54,031 --> 00:17:55,658
I'm sorry about Pedro,
356
00:17:55,741 --> 00:17:58,578
but we couldn't stand by
and see you get killed.
357
00:17:58,661 --> 00:18:01,372
Or worse,
become someone we have to sponge.
358
00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:02,832
[shudders]
359
00:18:02,915 --> 00:18:07,169
Oh. You care for me,
but don't want to care for me.
360
00:18:07,253 --> 00:18:10,381
I feel the same about all of you.
361
00:18:10,464 --> 00:18:12,008
[camera shutters clicking on TV]
362
00:18:12,091 --> 00:18:14,635
I deny these vicious rumors.
363
00:18:14,719 --> 00:18:16,220
And to clear my name,
364
00:18:16,304 --> 00:18:21,851
I invite my fans to come see me perform
my movie's most dangerous stunt.
365
00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:26,856
A comedic tumble down the steps
of Teotihuacán.
366
00:18:26,939 --> 00:18:29,108
The pyramid of Teotihuacán?
367
00:18:29,191 --> 00:18:33,321
That's suicide!
And still on our list of sights to see.
368
00:18:33,404 --> 00:18:37,533
To the pyramid of Tootytotai…
To the Mexican triangle!
369
00:18:39,660 --> 00:18:40,828
[camera shutter clicks]
370
00:18:40,911 --> 00:18:43,289
Homero, you are
the only one he will listen to.
371
00:18:43,372 --> 00:18:44,665
You have to stop him.
372
00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:46,459
Why are all these cameras set up?
373
00:18:46,542 --> 00:18:49,170
Well, better to have coverage
and not need it
374
00:18:49,253 --> 00:18:50,963
than to need it and not have it.
375
00:18:51,047 --> 00:18:53,424
Hold on, Pedro! I'm a-coming!
376
00:18:53,507 --> 00:18:56,427
Huh. Can I talk to the transpo department?
377
00:18:59,680 --> 00:19:02,016
Pedro, stop! You can't do this.
378
00:19:02,099 --> 00:19:05,311
I must.
I was supposed to suffer for my fans,
379
00:19:05,394 --> 00:19:08,064
to distract them
from their daily troubles,
380
00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:09,774
and I lied to them.
381
00:19:09,857 --> 00:19:15,821
Now my only path to redemption is pain,
hilarious pain.
382
00:19:16,906 --> 00:19:18,074
[grunts]
383
00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:20,368
Your fans don't want
to see you suffer for real.
384
00:19:20,451 --> 00:19:23,287
They just wanna see
a goofy guy in a bee costume
385
00:19:23,371 --> 00:19:25,247
saying "Ay, yi, yi" about stuff.
386
00:19:25,331 --> 00:19:28,876
All I wanted was for my son
to think I was a badass.
387
00:19:28,959 --> 00:19:32,171
But you know what I learned
after taking all that brutal punishment?
388
00:19:32,838 --> 00:19:36,300
I hate that kid,
and what he thinks doesn't matter.
389
00:19:36,384 --> 00:19:38,552
-[cracks]
-Oh. [chuckles]
390
00:19:38,636 --> 00:19:39,762
It does that now.
391
00:19:40,638 --> 00:19:41,639
[cracks]
392
00:19:41,722 --> 00:19:45,643
Ay, Dios. Look at you.
Making this movie has broken the body
393
00:19:45,726 --> 00:19:48,896
of my best non-Mexican friend
in the world.
394
00:19:48,979 --> 00:19:51,565
[sobs] Can you ever forgive me?
395
00:19:51,649 --> 00:19:56,362
[sobs] On one condition.
Don't do this stupid stunt!
396
00:19:56,445 --> 00:20:01,575
-I won't! I love you, man!
-I love you too!
397
00:20:01,659 --> 00:20:03,661
[both sobbing]
398
00:20:07,206 --> 00:20:11,961
What do you say we get out of here
and go eat a taco stand into submission?
399
00:20:12,044 --> 00:20:14,422
[sniffles] Sounds like a plan, amigo.
400
00:20:15,506 --> 00:20:17,133
[both yelping]
401
00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:19,427
-[Homer screaming] D'oh! D'oh!
-[Bumblebee Man grunting]
402
00:20:19,510 --> 00:20:20,928
[gasping]
403
00:20:21,011 --> 00:20:22,555
-Homero!
-Dad!
404
00:20:22,638 --> 00:20:25,015
The UNESCO World Heritage site!
405
00:20:25,099 --> 00:20:28,728
[both screaming]
406
00:20:28,811 --> 00:20:30,187
[Homer] D'oh! Oh! Son of a…
407
00:20:30,271 --> 00:20:31,272
[both yelp]
408
00:20:32,565 --> 00:20:35,025
-[Homer screaming]
-[Bumblebee Man shouting in Spanish]
409
00:20:35,109 --> 00:20:37,111
[laughing]
410
00:20:40,698 --> 00:20:44,201
[in Spanish] This man's suffering
takes away my troubles!
411
00:20:44,285 --> 00:20:48,372
[in English] It's beautiful.
We will take out the gringo in post.
412
00:20:48,456 --> 00:20:51,375
[♪ mariachi group plays
The Simpsons theme]
413
00:20:51,459 --> 00:20:52,460
Oh, so good.
414
00:20:52,543 --> 00:20:56,172
[chuckles] Man, we sure are lucky
we didn't get hurt in that fall.
415
00:20:56,255 --> 00:20:58,299
Uh, I'm not so sure.
416
00:20:59,592 --> 00:21:00,593
[Homer] Hmm.
417
00:21:01,969 --> 00:21:05,055
Excuse me, amigo, are we dead?
418
00:21:05,139 --> 00:21:06,182
Hmm.
419
00:21:07,349 --> 00:21:09,393
[Homer grunting]
420
00:21:09,477 --> 00:21:11,228
No, in a coma,
421
00:21:11,312 --> 00:21:15,191
but get comfy
'cause you're gonna be here for a while.
422
00:21:18,110 --> 00:21:20,362
It might be nice to have a break.
423
00:21:20,446 --> 00:21:22,490
And some cold cervezas.
424
00:21:22,573 --> 00:21:25,910
Homero, my friend. You read my mind.
425
00:21:26,535 --> 00:21:28,537
[♪ "Cien Años" playing]
426
00:21:38,547 --> 00:21:39,548
[♪ "Cien Años" ends]
427
00:21:41,634 --> 00:21:43,636
[♪ Spanish song playing]
428
00:22:20,589 --> 00:22:21,590
[♪ song ends]
429
00:22:21,674 --> 00:22:22,842
[whistles]
32839
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof