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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:17,268 --> 00:00:19,539 (Breathing heavily) 2 00:00:29,258 --> 00:00:31,530 (Grunting) 3 00:00:40,848 --> 00:00:43,119 (Groaning) 4 00:01:01,723 --> 00:01:03,761 (Exhales) 5 00:01:10,975 --> 00:01:12,845 Oh, God. 6 00:01:17,723 --> 00:01:20,193 (Sighs) 7 00:01:27,989 --> 00:01:30,493 What the fuck? 8 00:01:35,368 --> 00:01:37,572 (Grunting) 9 00:01:59,960 --> 00:02:02,164 (Groaning) 10 00:02:07,677 --> 00:02:08,862 (Yelps) 11 00:02:09,212 --> 00:02:12,018 (Grunting) 12 00:02:17,554 --> 00:02:19,724 (I a bored breathing) 13 00:02:21,336 --> 00:02:24,525 (Muffled): Help! Help! 14 00:02:24,609 --> 00:02:28,500 Help! Help! 15 00:02:28,584 --> 00:02:32,040 Help! Help! 16 00:02:32,124 --> 00:02:33,243 Help! 17 00:02:33,514 --> 00:02:35,784 (Groaning) 18 00:02:36,633 --> 00:02:38,905 [♪ ♪] 19 00:02:41,276 --> 00:02:43,547 (panting) 20 00:02:48,524 --> 00:02:50,794 (Exhaling) 21 00:03:05,324 --> 00:03:06,760 Okay. 22 00:03:08,163 --> 00:03:10,234 Okay. 23 00:03:11,703 --> 00:03:14,208 (Breathes deeply) 24 00:03:16,279 --> 00:03:18,550 [♪ ♪] 25 00:03:35,017 --> 00:03:36,804 (beep) 26 00:03:36,888 --> 00:03:38,473 GENE: Hello, Dr. Strauss. 27 00:03:38,557 --> 00:03:40,850 Uh, my name is Gene Bollinger. 28 00:03:40,935 --> 00:03:42,923 I was hoping to get started in a course 29 00:03:43,007 --> 00:03:44,392 of psychotherapy. 30 00:03:44,476 --> 00:03:46,396 I thought you might be able to help me 31 00:03:46,480 --> 00:03:47,915 with some of my problems. 32 00:03:48,618 --> 00:03:50,170 So, uh, yeah. 33 00:03:50,254 --> 00:03:52,641 I guess I'll call you back, uh, if that's okay. 34 00:03:52,725 --> 00:03:54,195 I'm a little hard to reach. 35 00:03:54,929 --> 00:03:57,368 Yeah, okay, thanks. 36 00:04:00,842 --> 00:04:03,113 (Machine beeps) 37 00:04:04,516 --> 00:04:05,902 (Phone beeps, dials) 38 00:04:05,986 --> 00:04:07,505 (line rings) 39 00:04:07,589 --> 00:04:10,344 SHOSHANA: Hi, it's Shoshana. Leave a message. 40 00:04:10,428 --> 00:04:12,548 - (Beep) - Hey, honey. It's Dad. 41 00:04:12,632 --> 00:04:13,717 Just checking in. 42 00:04:13,801 --> 00:04:15,721 I'm in sessions until 8:00. 43 00:04:15,805 --> 00:04:17,475 Bye-bye. 44 00:04:24,022 --> 00:04:26,159 What can I help you with, Gene? 45 00:04:28,864 --> 00:04:31,336 My dad beat the shit out of me. 46 00:04:32,452 --> 00:04:35,191 A lot, uh, when I was a kid. 47 00:04:36,813 --> 00:04:39,553 And I think it fucked me up. 48 00:04:40,321 --> 00:04:42,358 That's a tough thing to go through. 49 00:04:43,684 --> 00:04:45,414 You said it fucked you up. 50 00:04:45,840 --> 00:04:47,284 In what ways? 51 00:04:47,700 --> 00:04:48,997 All ways. 52 00:04:49,082 --> 00:04:50,190 (Pants softly) 53 00:04:50,827 --> 00:04:52,417 Like I'm not content. 54 00:04:52,903 --> 00:04:54,934 I don't have a good social life. 55 00:04:55,118 --> 00:04:57,355 I get angry. 56 00:05:00,261 --> 00:05:03,534 That's the sort of thing you help people with, right? 57 00:05:04,252 --> 00:05:06,122 Yes. 58 00:05:07,141 --> 00:05:08,583 So, I read your book. 59 00:05:08,844 --> 00:05:10,231 Oh. 60 00:05:10,315 --> 00:05:12,401 - What'd you think? - It was good. 61 00:05:12,485 --> 00:05:16,489 I thought, you know, this guy is a real expert. 62 00:05:16,594 --> 00:05:17,712 Mm-hmm. 63 00:05:17,796 --> 00:05:19,449 Well, I've been doing it a long time. 64 00:05:19,587 --> 00:05:21,457 (Chuckles softly) 65 00:05:23,166 --> 00:05:25,403 [♪ ♪] 66 00:05:30,145 --> 00:05:32,292 COLLEEN: I'm sorry for your loss. 67 00:05:33,060 --> 00:05:35,059 That's what normal people say, right? 68 00:05:35,919 --> 00:05:37,818 ALAN: How does it feel for you to say it? 69 00:05:37,902 --> 00:05:39,373 COLLEEN: It just, um... 70 00:05:40,017 --> 00:05:42,538 ...just seems like what I hear people say. 71 00:05:43,012 --> 00:05:44,198 But I mean it. 72 00:05:44,508 --> 00:05:46,965 Well, that is the important part. 73 00:05:49,659 --> 00:05:50,912 Gene, I wanted to ask you 74 00:05:50,996 --> 00:05:52,575 about your sunglasses. 75 00:05:52,942 --> 00:05:54,719 I think it might be a good idea for you 76 00:05:54,803 --> 00:05:56,778 to take them off, so we can see each other better. 77 00:05:56,863 --> 00:05:57,863 I have eye problems. 78 00:05:57,977 --> 00:05:59,696 ALAN: Oh, what's wrong? 79 00:05:59,781 --> 00:06:01,217 GENE: Light hurts them. 80 00:06:01,933 --> 00:06:03,552 They're oversensitive. 81 00:06:04,028 --> 00:06:05,708 You've seen a doctor about it? 82 00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:07,678 Two doctors. 83 00:06:07,887 --> 00:06:10,292 [♪ ♪] 84 00:06:15,011 --> 00:06:16,998 (water running) 85 00:06:17,575 --> 00:06:19,002 Well, we're out of time. 86 00:06:19,497 --> 00:06:20,972 Isn't that my line? 87 00:06:21,255 --> 00:06:22,809 (Water running) 88 00:06:23,340 --> 00:06:25,648 I'm trying to take care of your needs again, aren't I? 89 00:06:26,512 --> 00:06:27,685 I think so. 90 00:06:27,769 --> 00:06:30,074 [♪ ♪] 91 00:06:33,235 --> 00:06:34,771 He hit me. 92 00:06:35,820 --> 00:06:37,439 All the time. 93 00:06:37,524 --> 00:06:39,311 When you say "all the time," 94 00:06:39,559 --> 00:06:42,794 could you be any more specific about it? 95 00:06:42,879 --> 00:06:44,815 Pretty much all the time. 96 00:07:10,488 --> 00:07:12,291 (Baby fussing) 97 00:07:40,715 --> 00:07:42,752 [♪ ♪] 98 00:08:06,033 --> 00:08:08,319 - Thank you. - Thank you very much. 99 00:08:08,403 --> 00:08:10,658 - Alan, welcome. - ALAN: Chaim, how are you? 100 00:08:10,742 --> 00:08:11,759 Baruch Hashem. 101 00:08:11,843 --> 00:08:14,182 - You? - I'm well, thanks. 102 00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:17,504 - I'll be in the back. - EZRA: Oh. 103 00:08:17,588 --> 00:08:19,141 Okay. 104 00:08:19,225 --> 00:08:21,730 - Hi, Ezra. - Hi, Dad. 105 00:08:22,866 --> 00:08:24,786 It's Mom's guitar? 106 00:08:24,870 --> 00:08:25,989 Mm-hmm. 107 00:08:26,073 --> 00:08:27,792 I figured you should have it. 108 00:08:27,876 --> 00:08:30,648 You're the only one in the family who plays, so... 109 00:08:34,155 --> 00:08:36,593 I don't play anymore. 110 00:08:40,090 --> 00:08:42,934 GENE: That's it, 'cause you'd expect anybody to save their own ass, 111 00:08:43,019 --> 00:08:46,782 but he'd rather die than use her as his excuse, 112 00:08:46,867 --> 00:08:49,101 - like, uh, disgrace her. - ALAN: I think 113 00:08:49,186 --> 00:08:50,770 I have actually heard that one before. 114 00:08:50,854 --> 00:08:52,908 Right, it's a classic. 115 00:08:53,067 --> 00:08:54,913 (Chuckles) 116 00:08:55,144 --> 00:08:57,999 (Sighs deeply) 117 00:09:00,131 --> 00:09:01,918 You know, Gene, I've been thinking. 118 00:09:02,223 --> 00:09:03,278 It's been a while 119 00:09:03,363 --> 00:09:05,257 since we started talking together. 120 00:09:05,412 --> 00:09:08,936 And I've noticed that... 121 00:09:09,659 --> 00:09:13,663 ...you're not really opening yourself up to me. 122 00:09:14,303 --> 00:09:16,952 Whenever I ask for stories or details, 123 00:09:17,068 --> 00:09:20,202 you have a tendency to get kind of vague 124 00:09:20,441 --> 00:09:21,859 or you start telling me 125 00:09:21,944 --> 00:09:24,957 about country music songs that you like. 126 00:09:25,460 --> 00:09:29,548 And I've noticed that I myself am feeling 127 00:09:29,632 --> 00:09:32,239 a little frustrated by this process. 128 00:09:32,905 --> 00:09:35,542 And I'm wondering if you're feeling that as well. 129 00:09:36,680 --> 00:09:40,154 Usually when one person feels that way, it's kind of mutual. 130 00:09:42,485 --> 00:09:43,620 I don't know. 131 00:09:44,952 --> 00:09:48,194 I guess it's not working the way it did in your book. 132 00:09:48,537 --> 00:09:51,526 ALAN: Gene, in order for this process to work, 133 00:09:51,921 --> 00:09:54,198 you have to be able to tell me things 134 00:09:54,282 --> 00:09:56,820 that are not easy to tell. 135 00:09:57,638 --> 00:10:01,245 To be open and truthful. 136 00:10:04,166 --> 00:10:06,203 Maybe I'm not cut out for this. 137 00:10:08,243 --> 00:10:11,217 'Cause I'm... I'm trying. 138 00:10:12,251 --> 00:10:14,163 I really... I'm trying. 139 00:10:16,493 --> 00:10:18,463 In my experience... 140 00:10:19,499 --> 00:10:21,350 ...anyone who has come this far, 141 00:10:21,585 --> 00:10:24,850 who has made the choice to come to therapy 142 00:10:25,233 --> 00:10:27,991 and keep hammering away at the hard things... 143 00:10:29,734 --> 00:10:31,370 ...they can be helped. 144 00:10:37,042 --> 00:10:38,961 (Kettle whistling) 145 00:10:39,217 --> 00:10:41,850 Sportscaster speaking indistinctly on TV... 146 00:10:54,870 --> 00:10:56,156 (Wind whistling) 147 00:10:56,738 --> 00:10:59,242 (Clattering) 148 00:11:02,351 --> 00:11:04,305 (Dogs barking in distance) 149 00:11:04,873 --> 00:11:07,377 (Clattering) 150 00:11:09,399 --> 00:11:12,271 (Dogs continue barking) 151 00:11:15,090 --> 00:11:17,461 (Rustling) 152 00:11:32,153 --> 00:11:34,925 (Rattling) 153 00:11:54,923 --> 00:11:56,326 (Gasps) 154 00:12:01,615 --> 00:12:03,885 (Crows cawing in distance) 155 00:12:12,870 --> 00:12:15,358 [♪ ♪] 156 00:12:15,443 --> 00:12:17,981 (clattering) 157 00:12:22,112 --> 00:12:24,749 (Urinating nearby) 158 00:12:37,108 --> 00:12:39,378 (Toilet flushing) 159 00:12:49,929 --> 00:12:52,651 I'm so sorry. I know this sucks. 160 00:12:52,782 --> 00:12:54,317 I'll be right back. 161 00:13:00,835 --> 00:13:03,105 (Door closes) 162 00:13:05,098 --> 00:13:07,771 (Door opens) 163 00:13:07,856 --> 00:13:08,941 (Door closes) 164 00:13:09,439 --> 00:13:11,626 Gene, what the hell's going on? 165 00:13:12,654 --> 00:13:14,271 I mean, what the fuck?! 166 00:13:14,404 --> 00:13:16,769 Let me out, let me out, let me out of here. 167 00:13:16,853 --> 00:13:19,074 Let me out of here right now, Gene! 168 00:13:19,474 --> 00:13:21,696 - Gene! - You take it easy. 169 00:13:23,596 --> 00:13:25,516 Last night you were screaming. 170 00:13:26,037 --> 00:13:28,513 We're in the woods out here. Nobody's around. 171 00:13:32,985 --> 00:13:34,804 I know how upset you are. 172 00:13:35,123 --> 00:13:37,109 Of course. Anybody would be. 173 00:13:37,194 --> 00:13:39,365 This isn't as bad as it seems. 174 00:13:41,236 --> 00:13:45,093 It's bad, I know it's bad, but I just, I just need your help. 175 00:13:45,177 --> 00:13:46,246 Look... 176 00:13:47,248 --> 00:13:49,857 I don't know what you think you're doing, but this... 177 00:13:49,942 --> 00:13:51,327 this... (sighs) 178 00:13:51,412 --> 00:13:53,154 Unlock this goddamn chain. 179 00:13:53,239 --> 00:13:55,377 Right now. I mean it, Gene. 180 00:13:56,395 --> 00:13:58,231 Gene, listen, you have to listen to me. 181 00:13:59,238 --> 00:14:01,107 I realize that there's something inside of you 182 00:14:01,255 --> 00:14:02,794 that's telling you that this is a good idea... 183 00:14:02,878 --> 00:14:05,300 I know, it's-it's not exactly that it's a good idea, 184 00:14:05,384 --> 00:14:06,170 I do realize that. 185 00:14:06,255 --> 00:14:08,572 But, you know, I'm out of options, 186 00:14:08,657 --> 00:14:10,744 and I really think if we can just talk, 187 00:14:10,828 --> 00:14:12,916 this will, this will be okay. 188 00:14:13,388 --> 00:14:14,986 - Okay-ish. - I have to help you see 189 00:14:15,070 --> 00:14:16,806 that this is wrong. 190 00:14:17,842 --> 00:14:19,462 Scaring me like this is wrong. 191 00:14:19,546 --> 00:14:21,335 You have to see that. I know you can see that. 192 00:14:21,419 --> 00:14:22,839 I do, I do, I know, 193 00:14:23,020 --> 00:14:27,444 but... I wasn't getting anywhere in therapy. 194 00:14:27,528 --> 00:14:29,613 You said so yourself, right? 195 00:14:29,698 --> 00:14:31,051 And I think that I know why. 196 00:14:31,136 --> 00:14:32,687 You see, I-I couldn't... 197 00:14:32,771 --> 00:14:35,427 I couldn't really tell you the truth in your office. 198 00:14:35,511 --> 00:14:37,231 But here, here... I can. 199 00:14:37,315 --> 00:14:38,560 No, no, no, no, no. 200 00:14:38,645 --> 00:14:40,920 This-this-this isn't good for either of us, Gene. 201 00:14:41,005 --> 00:14:44,312 We have to go back to my office and work through this together 202 00:14:44,396 --> 00:14:45,915 before this gets more out of hand. 203 00:14:45,999 --> 00:14:49,321 These are leftovers from Maruti, which is one of my favorites. 204 00:14:49,405 --> 00:14:51,125 It's surprisingly good for breakfast. 205 00:14:51,209 --> 00:14:52,695 This is Chana palak. 206 00:14:52,920 --> 00:14:54,225 Put some of this on it. 207 00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:56,568 This is sabzi. It's good with this one. 208 00:14:56,652 --> 00:14:58,287 For God's sake, Gene, Gene! 209 00:14:58,372 --> 00:14:59,640 My name's... 210 00:15:01,334 --> 00:15:03,471 My name's actually Sam. 211 00:15:07,564 --> 00:15:08,734 Sorry. 212 00:15:12,654 --> 00:15:14,455 It's important to eat. 213 00:15:14,879 --> 00:15:16,699 I'm not gonna eat. 214 00:15:16,948 --> 00:15:18,683 Gene... Sam. 215 00:15:20,230 --> 00:15:22,804 You have to listen to me. 216 00:15:22,889 --> 00:15:23,941 I am listening. 217 00:15:24,175 --> 00:15:26,552 I am listening. I know how to listen. 218 00:15:26,691 --> 00:15:28,427 I understand... 219 00:15:28,688 --> 00:15:30,775 ...this is upsetting for you. 220 00:15:30,922 --> 00:15:32,240 I get that. 221 00:15:32,380 --> 00:15:33,545 It's a little scary, 222 00:15:33,630 --> 00:15:36,369 but this is the only way that I could... I... 223 00:15:37,979 --> 00:15:39,795 I need help. I want help. 224 00:15:40,732 --> 00:15:43,249 I'm asking you for, for help. 225 00:15:43,334 --> 00:15:45,295 You said therapy can't work if I'm not truthful. 226 00:15:45,380 --> 00:15:46,569 I know that you're right, so... 227 00:15:46,653 --> 00:15:48,406 Mm-mm. No. No, you don't understand. 228 00:15:48,490 --> 00:15:51,011 I don't, I don't think you know what you're doing to me. 229 00:15:51,095 --> 00:15:52,881 I realize it might take you a little time 230 00:15:52,965 --> 00:15:54,242 to get used to what's happening here. 231 00:15:54,326 --> 00:15:55,653 Whatever is troubling you, 232 00:15:55,737 --> 00:15:58,026 we can address it, but not here. 233 00:15:58,110 --> 00:16:00,230 - Not like this. - Dr. Strauss, I have much bigger problems 234 00:16:00,314 --> 00:16:01,816 than your other patients. 235 00:16:03,588 --> 00:16:05,123 I have a compulsion... 236 00:16:07,765 --> 00:16:09,534 ...to kill people. 237 00:16:14,485 --> 00:16:16,037 A compulsion? 238 00:16:18,591 --> 00:16:20,060 Yeah, I do it. 239 00:16:26,066 --> 00:16:28,334 - Sam... - I don't mean just once or twice. 240 00:16:30,103 --> 00:16:32,307 Every once in a while I just... 241 00:16:33,355 --> 00:16:34,791 ...do it. 242 00:16:37,050 --> 00:16:39,104 And this has gone on ever since, 243 00:16:39,423 --> 00:16:42,195 uh, for a long time. 244 00:16:42,763 --> 00:16:45,420 And I know I'm fucked up. 245 00:16:45,504 --> 00:16:47,060 I've read all the books, 246 00:16:47,145 --> 00:16:50,357 almost everything about, uh, people like me, 247 00:16:50,605 --> 00:16:53,068 people who do this stuff, and I can't... 248 00:16:55,878 --> 00:16:57,331 I want to stop. 249 00:16:57,552 --> 00:17:00,162 And I'm trying so hard. 250 00:17:00,259 --> 00:17:01,778 I'm trying so hard right now, 251 00:17:01,863 --> 00:17:03,483 but there's this guy, there's this one guy, 252 00:17:03,567 --> 00:17:04,953 and I just want to... 253 00:17:05,222 --> 00:17:07,287 for months now... 254 00:17:08,302 --> 00:17:09,804 Uh, but I've not done it. 255 00:17:10,660 --> 00:17:11,996 'Cause I... 256 00:17:13,827 --> 00:17:15,052 Uh, because I can't. 257 00:17:15,137 --> 00:17:16,181 Now, you, I wish you knew 258 00:17:16,266 --> 00:17:17,817 what it was like to live like this. 259 00:17:17,901 --> 00:17:19,588 It's not like what they say. 260 00:17:19,673 --> 00:17:21,244 Right? Where he's like a... 261 00:17:22,011 --> 00:17:23,965 Have you seen Silence of the Lambs? 262 00:17:24,049 --> 00:17:26,602 Where he's like a robot. (clears throat) 263 00:17:26,686 --> 00:17:28,123 It's not like that. 264 00:17:29,950 --> 00:17:31,081 Gene. 265 00:17:31,166 --> 00:17:34,138 - Sam. - Sam. 266 00:17:35,269 --> 00:17:36,822 Unlock this chain. 267 00:17:36,907 --> 00:17:39,394 I'm going to walk out of here and go back to my office. 268 00:17:39,479 --> 00:17:41,616 No, we already tried that. 269 00:17:41,701 --> 00:17:43,135 It didn't work without me telling you the truth. 270 00:17:43,219 --> 00:17:45,552 It will be different now that I know the truth. 271 00:17:45,802 --> 00:17:48,412 You will come to my office two, three days a week. 272 00:17:48,496 --> 00:17:50,483 I cannot help you like this. 273 00:17:50,567 --> 00:17:52,337 This is just going to make it worse. 274 00:17:52,974 --> 00:17:53,925 Let me go. 275 00:17:54,010 --> 00:17:55,362 I know you'd have to turn me in. 276 00:17:55,447 --> 00:17:58,686 No, no, no, no, no. I would not have to turn you in. 277 00:17:59,546 --> 00:18:01,132 Legally, ethically, 278 00:18:01,389 --> 00:18:03,834 unless you told me you were going to commit another crime, 279 00:18:03,919 --> 00:18:05,437 I can work with you. 280 00:18:05,830 --> 00:18:07,920 Everything you've told me so far is confidential. 281 00:18:08,005 --> 00:18:10,009 I am gonna commit another crime. 282 00:18:10,816 --> 00:18:12,886 (Exhaling) 283 00:18:16,921 --> 00:18:19,008 I know I'm not normal. 284 00:18:19,265 --> 00:18:21,135 But I don't feel crazy. 285 00:18:21,994 --> 00:18:23,246 I'm not... 286 00:18:23,581 --> 00:18:25,301 (sighs) 287 00:18:25,471 --> 00:18:27,925 I know this has to end, right? This has to stop. 288 00:18:28,009 --> 00:18:30,947 I just, I don't know how. 289 00:18:34,088 --> 00:18:35,556 This is not the way. 290 00:18:36,296 --> 00:18:37,666 Well... 291 00:18:38,751 --> 00:18:40,321 I'm sorry. 292 00:18:44,484 --> 00:18:46,204 Really, you're the best. 293 00:18:46,766 --> 00:18:49,785 I met with three different Jewish therapists. 294 00:18:50,633 --> 00:18:52,286 I chose you. 295 00:18:52,636 --> 00:18:54,883 Uh-huh. 296 00:19:01,442 --> 00:19:03,713 [♪ ♪] 297 00:21:06,325 --> 00:21:08,763 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH 18504

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