Original subtitles

We're going to have a movie next night. We never get to have our dad together.

I know, right?

I

think

I have some chocolate donut balls.

Oh my goodness.

There's a lot of sugar in it.

You think they're going to be down for a chick flick?

Um, I mean, we've seen them, right?

Tried.

I'm totally down for a chick flick.

What do you have in mind?

Maybe a velvet crush?

Ooh.

Mmm.

Mmm.

We could snuggle on the couch all we want.

It's a big, cushy blanket.

That sounds really good.

I think we should have even more popcorn.

Here you go.

Thank you.

Here, let me see if I can get a poppin' on your hair, Martha.

Okay.

I love this dress of yours.

It's really pretty.

It's, like, super flowy.

You should do a full spin for me.

Okay.

I know you gotta.

You want to try turning a poppin' on me?

Mm -hmm.

Do you think you can catch it?

Or do you think only...

Have we decided on a movie?

Yes.

We're going to watch Crushed Velvet.

No, we're not.

What do you want to watch?

Classic.

Yeah. Like what?

Something more inspiring.

There's two Christmas movies. I love Christmas movies.

There's all black and white Christmas movies.

Fucking love them.

You're kind of embarrassing me.

Just watch me. You might like it. If it's like his leave, 20 minutes.

You won't know if he'll leave good or bad.

Yeah, you're going to see what we're into these days. Right.

No, we're not watching Christmas.

If it's boring, we're going to change it. Yeah. Okay.

I think we can settle with that.

No, I go to the gym every day to look for something in my mouth.

Okay.

I don't know any of these people.

I can

tell this is going to be really boring.

His wife's super hot.

So you're watching this because you like the film because they're hot?

They need to be good actors. What more do you want because they've got good

action? You know what I mean, Johnny, right?

Actors. Not 9021067 whatever it is. You guys like action movies that don't have

a real plot anyway.

You don't need a plot. You've got action.

Well, we're talking and I'm paying attention.

You're going to miss something.

Shut up.

I don't know.

I don't care what the kids are into, I'm going.

This is a really good

action movie out on that new channel.

It's just come out today.

All the top stars.

Alright, alright, I'll shut up.

You know who the top stars are in the movie?

Yeah. I'm surprised.

I don't know who they are. Just relax and be quiet.

I'm just going to watch the whole movie.

Would you like some of the coffee?

No, nothing, sweetie.

Let's knock it out. Knock things out, Lauren.

Hello?

Yeah, knock these out.

Let's go for it. Okay.

It's locked.

Oh, my God.

Um, maybe my birthday?

No. No? Do you know what my birthday is?

Yes. It's the 24th. Okay. Come on. Let's try again. Okay.

No. Really?

I'm like, um, maybe something?

Uh, do you think it's worse than the one?

I don't.

Totally worse.

All right. Okay,

I'm ready.

Naughty. How is this hot?

I think it's kind of hot. Yeah? Mm -hmm. What do you like about it?

I mean, look at how that girl's all over his stepdad.

My God.

Holy crap.

My virgin eyes. Oh, my God.

So that's when you pick it?

That looks really...

Does this make me feel kind of funny?

A little bit.

Okay. I feel all

this heat like rushing in my body watching me. Yeah.

I do feel a little warm.

That's why we just ran so fast.

What are you doing?

What the fuck is... What's going on here?

I thought you were watching a movie.

What are you doing?

We're watching a movie.

That's not what we were watching, was it?

Who got into the porn channels?

That's not an excuse to start shaking out here.

Okay, well, why do you even have the discussion?

That's not the discussion.

We thought the movie was boring. We thought we would change it into

more boring. Well, change it to an action movie, not an action movie.

There's a bit of action in there. Yeah.

I mean, we enjoyed it.

Oh, I can see that.

Lucky we woke up.

Yeah, true, I guess.

I mean, Mr. Castle, I'm sure you've watched, you know, things like this in

past.

Of course I have.

I mean, I kind of need to get, like, exposure somewhere.

Well, you know, I would rather you watch it here with us than on your own with

other people.

Okay. Is it something you want to watch?

It's a company here.

Yeah. It's exciting.

So you're going to do it? Yeah.

We're going to watch it.

I'm willing to try it out.

Not too loud, I don't want the neighbors hearing it.

It feels

a little bit awkward though, you know, I'm watching this with you two.

Aw, you're so mad!

Let me try to maintain an open mind.

Okay, why did you pick that door stuff?

Um, it was all the fun.

I'm sure there was more.

I'm just saying.

It looks like this might be a good part. I mean, watching the

film is one thing, but this is kind of crossing the line, don't you think? Mr.

Cass was into this.

He looks clean.

I don't think you should be complaining.

I think we should let it go this one time.

I think that's a great idea. I won't tell Mom.

No, we will not.

months, right?

No. I mean, girls would do it if you can see it.

I think so.

I think you are enjoying it.

Oh, if you're going to do this, you must do it, right?

Thank you.

Thank you.

Amen.

Thank you.

Oh my gosh.

Oh my gosh.

Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh.

Oh my gosh.

Woo!

Oh!

Here we go.

Thank you.

It's insane.

Do you have any veterans?

No. No.

No.

Thank you.

Oh, shit.

Oh, shit.

Yes. Yes.

Man, that pussy is good.

That pussy tastes good.

That's it.

That's it.

Thank you for watching Pornhub.

Yes,

yes

I'm changing the password as of now because God knows what you're going to

in two days.