All language subtitles for All in the Family - S03E11 - The Locket

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish Download
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,737 --> 00:00:07,549 ♪ Boy, the way Glenn Miller played ♪ 2 00:00:07,573 --> 00:00:11,219 ♪ Songs that made The Hit Parade ♪ 3 00:00:11,243 --> 00:00:14,890 ♪ Guys like us We had it made ♪ 4 00:00:14,914 --> 00:00:18,159 ♪ Those were the days ♪ 5 00:00:18,183 --> 00:00:22,163 ♪ And you knew Where you were then ♪ 6 00:00:22,187 --> 00:00:25,501 ♪ Girls were girls And men were men ♪ 7 00:00:25,525 --> 00:00:32,273 ♪ Mister, we could use a man Like Herbert Hoover again ♪ 8 00:00:32,297 --> 00:00:34,242 ♪ Didn't need No welfare state ♪ 9 00:00:34,266 --> 00:00:38,413 ♪ Everybody pulled His weight ♪ 10 00:00:38,437 --> 00:00:42,751 ♪ Gee, our old LaSalle Ran great ♪ 11 00:00:42,775 --> 00:00:48,579 ♪ Those were the days ♪♪ 12 00:00:55,855 --> 00:00:57,065 Oh. 13 00:00:58,925 --> 00:01:01,302 Oh, that's so funny, Bertha. 14 00:01:01,326 --> 00:01:04,773 I'll have to remember to tell that one to Archie. 15 00:01:04,797 --> 00:01:07,743 He always likes jokes that end up funnier 16 00:01:07,767 --> 00:01:11,379 than when they start out. 17 00:01:11,403 --> 00:01:14,249 No, I had nothing special to say. 18 00:01:14,273 --> 00:01:16,484 It's just it's so lonely around here 19 00:01:16,508 --> 00:01:18,954 since Gloria started working. 20 00:01:18,978 --> 00:01:21,757 If it wasn't for the TV in the afternoon, 21 00:01:21,781 --> 00:01:25,694 there'd be nobody to talk to at all. 22 00:01:25,718 --> 00:01:28,396 Oh, I hear him coming. I got to hang up, Bertha. Yeah. 23 00:01:28,420 --> 00:01:30,198 Bye. 24 00:01:30,222 --> 00:01:33,969 Oh, hello, Archie. 25 00:01:33,993 --> 00:01:35,370 How was your day? 26 00:01:35,394 --> 00:01:39,307 Lousy, Edith, lousy. 27 00:01:39,331 --> 00:01:42,010 The world out there is full of nuts and fruitcakes, 28 00:01:42,034 --> 00:01:44,379 and sometimes I think I'm gonna go the same way. 29 00:01:44,403 --> 00:01:46,281 Oh, no. Oh, be prepared, Edith. 30 00:01:46,305 --> 00:01:47,749 If I got to ride them subways 31 00:01:47,773 --> 00:01:48,917 another two years, 32 00:01:48,941 --> 00:01:50,385 you're gonna have to check me 33 00:01:50,409 --> 00:01:51,720 into a rubber room. 34 00:01:51,744 --> 00:01:53,789 Oh, ain't that funny? Bertha... I was coming home... 35 00:01:53,813 --> 00:01:57,593 I'm talking, Edith. 36 00:01:57,617 --> 00:02:00,562 I'm coming home tonight and it's sardine time again. 37 00:02:00,586 --> 00:02:03,031 Here's a guy pressed up against me so close, 38 00:02:03,055 --> 00:02:06,101 his buttons are making permanent dents in my flesh, see? 39 00:02:06,125 --> 00:02:07,268 So there we are. 40 00:02:07,292 --> 00:02:08,570 We're riding nose to nose, 41 00:02:08,594 --> 00:02:10,338 and he starts talking to his daughter. 42 00:02:10,362 --> 00:02:12,140 Well, what's the matter with that? 43 00:02:12,164 --> 00:02:14,498 She wasn't there, Edith. 44 00:02:18,037 --> 00:02:19,247 Then on top of that, 45 00:02:19,271 --> 00:02:22,706 the bum behind me had beans for lunch. 46 00:02:29,115 --> 00:02:31,015 How did you know that? 47 00:02:37,657 --> 00:02:41,603 I could tell by the way he smiled at me. 48 00:02:41,627 --> 00:02:42,671 Oh. 49 00:02:42,695 --> 00:02:45,340 Why ain't supper on the table here, huh? 50 00:02:45,364 --> 00:02:47,509 Well, can you wait a little while? 51 00:02:47,533 --> 00:02:49,410 Gloria ain't home from work yet. 52 00:02:49,434 --> 00:02:51,013 Aw, jeez, there's another one 53 00:02:51,037 --> 00:02:52,648 that lost her nuts and bolts. 54 00:02:52,672 --> 00:02:55,083 It's bad enough she's married to the meathead. 55 00:02:55,107 --> 00:02:58,386 Now she's got to go working his way through school. 56 00:02:58,410 --> 00:03:00,889 Edith, where's the aspirin? I have a head coming on. 57 00:03:00,913 --> 00:03:02,190 It's upstairs. 58 00:03:02,214 --> 00:03:05,027 Why is it always upstairs when I'm downstairs 59 00:03:05,051 --> 00:03:06,261 and downstairs when I'm upstairs? 60 00:03:06,285 --> 00:03:07,896 Can't you never organize nothing, Edith, huh? 61 00:03:07,920 --> 00:03:09,197 Oh, well, I'll get it. 62 00:03:09,221 --> 00:03:11,332 No, no, no, don't bother. I'll get the aspirin. 63 00:03:11,356 --> 00:03:13,301 Get supper on the table, huh? 64 00:03:13,325 --> 00:03:15,704 Jeez, one of these days I'm gonna come home from work 65 00:03:15,728 --> 00:03:17,505 and I'm gonna reach out my two hands 66 00:03:17,529 --> 00:03:19,507 to get the things that I need and I want 67 00:03:19,531 --> 00:03:20,691 and I'm gonna find them... 68 00:03:22,434 --> 00:03:24,646 Oh, hello, Gloria. 69 00:03:24,670 --> 00:03:26,748 How was your day at work? 70 00:03:26,772 --> 00:03:28,283 Lousy, Ma. 71 00:03:28,307 --> 00:03:29,651 I'm telling you, 72 00:03:29,675 --> 00:03:32,035 it's a city full of weirdos out there. 73 00:03:39,952 --> 00:03:41,196 To begin with, 74 00:03:41,220 --> 00:03:42,998 it was sales day at the store. 75 00:03:43,022 --> 00:03:44,199 Do you have any idea 76 00:03:44,223 --> 00:03:47,169 what 50% off does to nice, normal women? 77 00:03:47,193 --> 00:03:49,604 It turns them into raving lunatics. 78 00:03:49,628 --> 00:03:51,272 Did you ever see a size 18 fatso 79 00:03:51,296 --> 00:03:53,030 trying to zip herself into a size 10? 80 00:03:55,267 --> 00:03:56,511 No, but I remember... 81 00:03:56,535 --> 00:04:00,548 Ma! I'm talking, Ma. 82 00:04:00,572 --> 00:04:02,417 Now, if that wasn't bad enough, 83 00:04:02,441 --> 00:04:05,353 coming home on the bus I felt like a sardine in a can. 84 00:04:05,377 --> 00:04:06,521 And lucky me, 85 00:04:06,545 --> 00:04:08,857 I got to be standing right next to a groper. 86 00:04:08,881 --> 00:04:13,661 He made me feel like a fresh loaf of Wonder Bread. 87 00:04:13,685 --> 00:04:15,931 Oh, my. I tell you, 88 00:04:15,955 --> 00:04:18,100 the only good thing about getting on a bus nowadays 89 00:04:18,124 --> 00:04:19,667 is knowing that you're getting off again. 90 00:04:19,691 --> 00:04:21,970 Hold it, hold it there, little girl. 91 00:04:21,994 --> 00:04:23,038 I could hear them complaints 92 00:04:23,062 --> 00:04:24,606 all the way up in the toilet. 93 00:04:24,630 --> 00:04:27,542 Listen, you ain't been working long enough to know, 94 00:04:27,566 --> 00:04:29,778 but when you come home at the end of the day, 95 00:04:29,802 --> 00:04:33,270 you're supposed to leave your troubles outside the door. 96 00:04:35,340 --> 00:04:37,652 You come in with a cheerful word and a smile. 97 00:04:37,676 --> 00:04:39,054 Don't be bringing your burdens in here 98 00:04:39,078 --> 00:04:40,588 and dumping them on your mother. 99 00:04:40,612 --> 00:04:43,013 Will you get supper on the table? 100 00:04:44,850 --> 00:04:46,928 Mike ain't home yet. 101 00:04:46,952 --> 00:04:48,096 Oh, good. 102 00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:49,264 Maybe we'll get a chance 103 00:04:49,288 --> 00:04:52,667 to look at the food now before it disappears. 104 00:04:52,691 --> 00:04:55,003 In the meantime, can you bring me a beer over here? 105 00:04:55,027 --> 00:04:56,004 Oh, sure, Archie. 106 00:04:56,028 --> 00:04:57,906 Ma, why isn't Michael home yet? 107 00:04:57,930 --> 00:04:59,374 Did he say he'd be late? 108 00:04:59,398 --> 00:05:01,076 No, I don't think so. 109 00:05:01,100 --> 00:05:03,245 He better not be late, because after supper, 110 00:05:03,269 --> 00:05:05,713 he's got to help me move that refrigerator out there. 111 00:05:05,737 --> 00:05:07,938 I got to fix a pipe that's leaking behind it. 112 00:05:09,341 --> 00:05:10,318 Hi, Michael. 113 00:05:10,342 --> 00:05:11,319 Hi. 114 00:05:11,343 --> 00:05:12,320 How was your day? 115 00:05:12,344 --> 00:05:13,624 Lousy. 116 00:05:15,714 --> 00:05:16,691 Ah! 117 00:05:16,715 --> 00:05:17,692 What's the matter? 118 00:05:17,716 --> 00:05:19,694 Ah! No, nothing. 119 00:05:19,718 --> 00:05:21,429 It's just a little bit of a twinge. 120 00:05:21,453 --> 00:05:23,064 It's your side again, isn't it? 121 00:05:23,088 --> 00:05:24,565 It's that dumb appendix. 122 00:05:24,589 --> 00:05:26,401 Yeah. That's why I'm late. 123 00:05:26,425 --> 00:05:28,403 I've just been to see Dr. Nelson about it. 124 00:05:28,427 --> 00:05:29,838 Oh, hi, Mike. 125 00:05:29,862 --> 00:05:31,807 Here's your beer, Archie. 126 00:05:31,831 --> 00:05:32,941 Leave it there, Edith. 127 00:05:32,965 --> 00:05:34,176 Michael, I told you months ago 128 00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:35,911 you should have that taken care of. 129 00:05:35,935 --> 00:05:37,179 Well, Gloria, Dr. Nelson said 130 00:05:37,203 --> 00:05:38,479 it's just a typical grumbling appendix. 131 00:05:38,503 --> 00:05:39,981 There's no emergency. 132 00:05:40,005 --> 00:05:41,883 Yeah, but it could flare up at any time. 133 00:05:41,907 --> 00:05:44,252 But he said I could have it out whenever I'm ready. 134 00:05:44,276 --> 00:05:46,554 Michael, I think you're ready. 135 00:05:46,578 --> 00:05:49,424 Yeah. I just don't like the idea of being cut. 136 00:05:49,448 --> 00:05:51,927 Oh, nowadays, taking out your appendix 137 00:05:51,951 --> 00:05:54,162 is a simple, routine operation. 138 00:05:54,186 --> 00:05:55,931 Oh, maybe not. 139 00:05:55,955 --> 00:05:57,165 Them doctors open him up, 140 00:05:57,189 --> 00:05:58,333 they might find themselves 141 00:05:58,357 --> 00:06:00,324 rooting around in a bottomless pit. 142 00:06:07,166 --> 00:06:08,776 What is it with you? 143 00:06:08,800 --> 00:06:10,912 Don't you take anything serious? 144 00:06:10,936 --> 00:06:13,849 Don't you see they want to cut out my appendix? 145 00:06:13,873 --> 00:06:16,184 Ah, face up to it like a man, will you? 146 00:06:16,208 --> 00:06:17,618 Jeez, I had an operation. 147 00:06:17,642 --> 00:06:19,221 Nobody heard me hollering around. 148 00:06:19,245 --> 00:06:20,222 Right, Edith? 149 00:06:20,246 --> 00:06:22,357 Oh, no, no, Archie. 150 00:06:22,381 --> 00:06:24,248 You fainted. 151 00:06:26,385 --> 00:06:28,363 Who asked you? 152 00:06:28,387 --> 00:06:30,131 I don't need an operation. 153 00:06:30,155 --> 00:06:32,367 I mean, I can continue with the ice pack. 154 00:06:32,391 --> 00:06:33,735 Why rush into these things? 155 00:06:33,759 --> 00:06:36,104 But, Michael, if it's gotta go, it's gotta go. 156 00:06:36,128 --> 00:06:38,273 Why hang on to something that's useless? 157 00:06:38,297 --> 00:06:41,398 That's what I've been asking you ever since you married him. 158 00:06:43,035 --> 00:06:46,181 Maybe the appendix ain't useless. 159 00:06:46,205 --> 00:06:50,151 Maybe God put it there for doctors to practice up on 160 00:06:50,175 --> 00:06:52,409 for more serious operations. 161 00:06:56,248 --> 00:06:59,227 You're a pip, you know that? 162 00:06:59,251 --> 00:07:01,029 Well, nobody's going to practice up on me. 163 00:07:01,053 --> 00:07:02,830 I mean, when I decide to have this operation, 164 00:07:02,854 --> 00:07:04,099 I'm gonna have the best. 165 00:07:04,123 --> 00:07:05,767 Dr. Nelson recommended the best surgeon he knew. 166 00:07:05,791 --> 00:07:07,202 He called Dr. McKenzie. 167 00:07:07,226 --> 00:07:09,070 Well, you know who I think we should call? 168 00:07:09,094 --> 00:07:10,071 Who? 169 00:07:10,095 --> 00:07:11,472 Chicken Delight, Edith, 170 00:07:11,496 --> 00:07:15,176 because we ain't gonna get no supper out of you. 171 00:07:15,200 --> 00:07:17,212 I'll help you, Ma. 172 00:07:17,236 --> 00:07:18,479 Michael, I think you should have 173 00:07:18,503 --> 00:07:20,615 that appendix taken care of right away. 174 00:07:20,639 --> 00:07:22,083 Gloria, I'm not ready yet. 175 00:07:22,107 --> 00:07:24,119 Besides, where's the money coming from to pay for it? 176 00:07:24,143 --> 00:07:25,686 Our savings account. 177 00:07:25,710 --> 00:07:27,355 Oh, no, no, no. That's your money. 178 00:07:27,379 --> 00:07:28,356 That's not mine. 179 00:07:28,380 --> 00:07:30,392 Michael, that's our money. 180 00:07:30,416 --> 00:07:32,427 We each contribute in our own way. 181 00:07:32,451 --> 00:07:33,962 That's right. 182 00:07:33,986 --> 00:07:37,532 You contribute deposits. He contributes withdrawals. 183 00:07:37,556 --> 00:07:41,569 Daddy, our marriage is an equal partnership. 184 00:07:41,593 --> 00:07:43,238 We share everything. 185 00:07:43,262 --> 00:07:44,772 Well, tell your equal partner 186 00:07:44,796 --> 00:07:47,275 he's gonna share some work with me tonight after supper. 187 00:07:47,299 --> 00:07:48,743 Gonna move that refrigerator. 188 00:07:48,767 --> 00:07:50,145 Michael, don't you move anything, 189 00:07:50,169 --> 00:07:51,646 not the way you're feeling tonight. 190 00:07:51,670 --> 00:07:53,448 Don't be getting him out of work, will you? 191 00:07:53,472 --> 00:07:54,849 He gets out of enough work himself. 192 00:07:54,873 --> 00:07:55,917 All right, Arch. 193 00:07:55,941 --> 00:07:57,185 You want to move the refrigerator? 194 00:07:57,209 --> 00:07:58,686 Come on. We'll do it now. 195 00:07:58,710 --> 00:07:59,854 Ah! 196 00:07:59,878 --> 00:08:02,157 Ah, ah, no, no, no. 197 00:08:02,181 --> 00:08:04,426 Ah, jeez, what's this supposed to be now? 198 00:08:04,450 --> 00:08:07,996 It's a pain. 199 00:08:08,020 --> 00:08:10,165 I got a... I got a sharp pain right here. 200 00:08:10,189 --> 00:08:12,934 You're giving me a dull pain right there. 201 00:08:12,958 --> 00:08:14,336 Ah, leave me alone, will you, Arch? 202 00:08:14,360 --> 00:08:15,337 Gloria! 203 00:08:15,361 --> 00:08:16,338 Yeah? 204 00:08:16,362 --> 00:08:17,939 Will you get me an ice pack, please? 205 00:08:17,963 --> 00:08:20,141 Oh, is it worse? Yeah, it's worse. 206 00:08:20,165 --> 00:08:23,011 Oh, gee, maybe I'll have to have that operation after all. 207 00:08:23,035 --> 00:08:25,013 I don't know how we're gonna pay for it. 208 00:08:25,037 --> 00:08:27,815 Soup's on! 209 00:08:27,839 --> 00:08:29,884 Good. It's about time, too. 210 00:08:29,908 --> 00:08:31,853 Jeez, we're all starving over here. 211 00:08:31,877 --> 00:08:33,355 What kind of soup you got, Edith? 212 00:08:33,379 --> 00:08:35,723 Oh, we're not having soup, Archie. 213 00:08:35,747 --> 00:08:39,827 Well, what the hell are you yelling "Soup's on" for? 214 00:08:39,851 --> 00:08:41,896 It's just an expression. 215 00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:43,465 It means dinner's ready. 216 00:08:43,489 --> 00:08:46,101 Well, why can't you just say, "Dinner's ready"? 217 00:08:46,125 --> 00:08:48,103 All right. Dinner's ready! 218 00:08:48,127 --> 00:08:50,647 Ah, no. Not now. 219 00:08:51,497 --> 00:08:53,708 Here you are, Michael. Here's your ice pack. 220 00:08:53,732 --> 00:08:55,310 You'd better take off your pants. 221 00:08:55,334 --> 00:08:57,178 Hold it! Hold it! 222 00:08:57,202 --> 00:08:59,814 No pants off in the living room. - Why not? 223 00:08:59,838 --> 00:09:01,216 Mixed company here. 224 00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:02,717 Mixed company? 225 00:09:02,741 --> 00:09:05,286 Your mother don't want to see him standing in his drawers. 226 00:09:05,310 --> 00:09:07,389 Arch, it's for my side. 227 00:09:07,413 --> 00:09:08,490 Yeah, your side, your side. 228 00:09:08,514 --> 00:09:10,525 It's for your lower side, 229 00:09:10,549 --> 00:09:12,760 which ain't supposed to be seen except behind bedroom doors. 230 00:09:12,784 --> 00:09:14,095 Now get upstairs. 231 00:09:14,119 --> 00:09:17,298 Daddy, Michael can't walk upstairs with this pain. 232 00:09:17,322 --> 00:09:19,200 Oh, boy, you know something, Daddy? 233 00:09:19,224 --> 00:09:20,735 You're really a prude. 234 00:09:20,759 --> 00:09:22,137 I'm a prude? 235 00:09:22,161 --> 00:09:24,139 How would you like it if I dropped my pants 236 00:09:24,163 --> 00:09:25,940 every time I wanted to put an ice pack 237 00:09:25,964 --> 00:09:27,397 up against my private parts? 238 00:09:31,570 --> 00:09:34,438 Archie, I ain't never seen you do that. 239 00:09:36,675 --> 00:09:39,687 That is because I never do that, Edith. 240 00:09:39,711 --> 00:09:40,988 Oh. 241 00:09:41,012 --> 00:09:42,924 All done. You can look now, Daddy. 242 00:09:42,948 --> 00:09:45,260 Who the hell wants to look at that? 243 00:09:45,284 --> 00:09:47,529 Mike, here's some water, 244 00:09:47,553 --> 00:09:49,164 and I'll bring your plate. 245 00:09:49,188 --> 00:09:51,299 You don't have to sit up at the table. 246 00:09:51,323 --> 00:09:52,434 Oh, that's all right, Ma. 247 00:09:52,458 --> 00:09:53,634 I don't feel like eating, anyway. 248 00:09:53,658 --> 00:09:55,036 Hold it, hold it. 249 00:09:55,060 --> 00:09:57,238 What's this I hear? He don't feel like eating? 250 00:09:57,262 --> 00:09:59,941 You're gonna have me believing he's really sick. 251 00:09:59,965 --> 00:10:02,610 What is it with you, Meathead? You really feel bad? 252 00:10:02,634 --> 00:10:05,146 Yeah, that's what I've been trying to tell you. 253 00:10:05,170 --> 00:10:06,147 I feel terrible. 254 00:10:06,171 --> 00:10:07,848 Oh. 255 00:10:07,872 --> 00:10:10,017 Oh, jeez. 256 00:10:10,041 --> 00:10:11,152 Well... 257 00:10:11,176 --> 00:10:12,309 I better eat. 258 00:10:15,380 --> 00:10:16,491 Michael, I think 259 00:10:16,515 --> 00:10:18,493 you should have that operation soon. 260 00:10:18,517 --> 00:10:19,827 Gloria, do you know 261 00:10:19,851 --> 00:10:21,129 how much Dr. McKenzie charges? 262 00:10:21,153 --> 00:10:24,199 350 dollars. 263 00:10:24,223 --> 00:10:27,068 350 dollars? 264 00:10:27,092 --> 00:10:28,536 For one appendix? 265 00:10:28,560 --> 00:10:31,839 Certainly. All them surgeons, they're highway robbers. 266 00:10:31,863 --> 00:10:36,266 Why do you think they wear masks when they operate? 267 00:10:39,538 --> 00:10:40,815 Wait a minute. 268 00:10:40,839 --> 00:10:42,183 Wait a minute. 269 00:10:42,207 --> 00:10:44,552 Why don't we ask Audrey Stern to do the operation? 270 00:10:44,576 --> 00:10:46,087 Audrey Stern? 271 00:10:46,111 --> 00:10:47,888 Remember? She worked with us 272 00:10:47,912 --> 00:10:49,524 on the Youth Vote Registration campaign. 273 00:10:49,548 --> 00:10:50,525 Dr. Audrey Stern? 274 00:10:50,549 --> 00:10:51,993 Oh, yeah. 275 00:10:52,017 --> 00:10:55,263 She did Mary Goodwin's appendix for only 150 dollars. 276 00:10:55,287 --> 00:10:56,697 Why don't I call her tonight? 277 00:10:56,721 --> 00:10:58,633 Well, I... I don't know, Gloria. 278 00:10:58,657 --> 00:11:01,369 I mean, Dr. Nelson already has me set up with Dr. McKenzie. 279 00:11:01,393 --> 00:11:02,737 It doesn't sound ethical. 280 00:11:02,761 --> 00:11:04,205 It sounds cheaper. 281 00:11:04,229 --> 00:11:06,508 It sounds stupid. 282 00:11:06,532 --> 00:11:07,675 What do you mean, stupid? 283 00:11:07,699 --> 00:11:09,210 I mean, little girl, 284 00:11:09,234 --> 00:11:10,845 that I wouldn't let no doctor 285 00:11:10,869 --> 00:11:14,449 by the name of Audrey fool around with me. 286 00:11:14,473 --> 00:11:15,916 You take my advice there, Meathead. 287 00:11:15,940 --> 00:11:17,452 You stick to a man. 288 00:11:17,476 --> 00:11:18,919 You get yourself an older guy 289 00:11:18,943 --> 00:11:21,122 with experience, like McKenzie. 290 00:11:21,146 --> 00:11:23,891 Daddy, how do you know how old Dr. McKenzie is? 291 00:11:23,915 --> 00:11:25,293 You never even heard of him 292 00:11:25,317 --> 00:11:26,794 till five minutes ago. 293 00:11:26,818 --> 00:11:28,596 Well, I know Dr. Nelson. 294 00:11:28,620 --> 00:11:29,797 I know he wouldn't recommend nobody 295 00:11:29,821 --> 00:11:31,199 who didn't have savvy. 296 00:11:31,223 --> 00:11:33,868 So you're saying you'd rather be operated on 297 00:11:33,892 --> 00:11:37,272 by a doddery old man than an efficient young woman? 298 00:11:37,296 --> 00:11:38,906 That is right, little girl, 299 00:11:38,930 --> 00:11:42,076 because a woman doctor's only good for women's problems, 300 00:11:42,100 --> 00:11:43,800 like your "groinecology" there. 301 00:11:49,174 --> 00:11:51,719 For a man's problems, you need a man doctor 302 00:11:51,743 --> 00:11:54,855 who knows his way around in there. 303 00:11:54,879 --> 00:11:58,793 Nobody wants some nervous dame foostering around there. 304 00:11:58,817 --> 00:12:00,595 I mean, she'd cut the wrong string 305 00:12:00,619 --> 00:12:02,699 and the poor guy's keister would fall off. 306 00:12:05,357 --> 00:12:07,768 Daddy! 307 00:12:07,792 --> 00:12:09,804 What about you? What kind of a wife are you? 308 00:12:09,828 --> 00:12:11,506 Ain't you got no concern for your husband? 309 00:12:11,530 --> 00:12:13,675 He don't want to be operated on by no woman. 310 00:12:13,699 --> 00:12:15,743 All right, Daddy, that's enough out of you. 311 00:12:15,767 --> 00:12:17,612 Michael, what do you think? 312 00:12:17,636 --> 00:12:20,081 Should we call Audrey Stern? 313 00:12:20,105 --> 00:12:22,317 I don't know, Gloria. I was just thinking, uh, 314 00:12:22,341 --> 00:12:25,119 I don't know if I like the idea of a friend operating on me. 315 00:12:25,143 --> 00:12:27,855 Friend? You only met her a couple times 316 00:12:27,879 --> 00:12:29,591 at the committee meetings. 317 00:12:29,615 --> 00:12:31,826 Michael, she hardly rates as your best buddy. 318 00:12:31,850 --> 00:12:33,561 Yeah, but even so, she knows me. 319 00:12:33,585 --> 00:12:34,851 It's an emotional thing. 320 00:12:36,321 --> 00:12:39,534 Michael, Audrey Stern is a fully qualified surgeon, 321 00:12:39,558 --> 00:12:41,001 and she's less expensive. 322 00:12:41,025 --> 00:12:42,670 Gloria, it's not the money. 323 00:12:42,694 --> 00:12:44,171 Well, what is it, then, Michael? 324 00:12:44,195 --> 00:12:46,207 Are you saying that a woman's reflexes 325 00:12:46,231 --> 00:12:48,243 are slower than a man's? Of course not. 326 00:12:48,267 --> 00:12:50,745 Or her hands aren't as steady? No. 327 00:12:50,769 --> 00:12:52,947 Well, then it must be that men are smarter than women. 328 00:12:52,971 --> 00:12:53,948 Is that it? 329 00:12:53,972 --> 00:12:55,938 Bull's-eye, little girl. 330 00:12:58,343 --> 00:13:00,943 Bull, period, Daddy. 331 00:13:02,681 --> 00:13:04,525 You hear the lip on your daughter there? 332 00:13:04,549 --> 00:13:06,527 Mm-hmm. 333 00:13:06,551 --> 00:13:08,351 Well, Michael? 334 00:13:11,022 --> 00:13:13,067 Is that it? Are men smarter than women? 335 00:13:13,091 --> 00:13:14,469 Gloria, I didn't say that. 336 00:13:14,493 --> 00:13:15,637 Yeah, but you meant it. 337 00:13:15,661 --> 00:13:18,239 Admit it, Michael. You're as bad as Daddy. 338 00:13:18,263 --> 00:13:20,475 You're prejudiced against a woman surgeon. 339 00:13:20,499 --> 00:13:22,243 Gloria, this is my appendix. 340 00:13:22,267 --> 00:13:25,146 It's my operation, so I want to pick my doctor! 341 00:13:25,170 --> 00:13:26,748 And pay him with my money. 342 00:13:26,772 --> 00:13:29,651 Oh, now it's your money. 343 00:13:29,675 --> 00:13:31,452 A minute ago, it was our money. 344 00:13:31,476 --> 00:13:32,820 All right, Michael, our money, 345 00:13:32,844 --> 00:13:35,823 but that means at least I have a say in how we spend it. 346 00:13:35,847 --> 00:13:37,925 Yes! When it's your appendix, you'll have a say. 347 00:13:37,949 --> 00:13:39,160 Oh, listen, Michael, this is... 348 00:13:39,184 --> 00:13:40,227 No, you listen... 349 00:13:40,251 --> 00:13:41,496 Aah! 350 00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:42,497 Michael, what's the matter?! 351 00:13:42,521 --> 00:13:43,498 That's it. It's flaring up. 352 00:13:43,522 --> 00:13:44,699 Call the doctor. Call the doctor. 353 00:13:44,723 --> 00:13:45,700 Ma, call the doctor. 354 00:13:45,724 --> 00:13:47,968 Right away! 355 00:13:47,992 --> 00:13:51,272 Which one? 356 00:13:51,296 --> 00:13:52,907 Give me that telephone, will you? 357 00:13:52,931 --> 00:13:54,342 I'll do that. 358 00:13:54,366 --> 00:13:56,811 You don't know how to make no emergency call. 359 00:13:56,835 --> 00:13:58,245 Listen, hey, Gloria. 360 00:13:58,269 --> 00:13:59,914 Cover up the meathead over there. 361 00:13:59,938 --> 00:14:01,316 I'll make the phone call here, 362 00:14:01,340 --> 00:14:02,883 and Edith, you... 363 00:14:02,907 --> 00:14:04,747 Get some ketchup on the table. 364 00:14:09,246 --> 00:14:10,925 Oh, I think I'm running a temperature. 365 00:14:10,949 --> 00:14:12,726 I'll get the thermometer. 366 00:14:12,750 --> 00:14:14,462 Yeah, I'm burning up. 367 00:14:14,486 --> 00:14:15,863 I'll get you a cool cloth, Michael. 368 00:14:15,887 --> 00:14:17,698 Yeah, well, when are you gonna hear 369 00:14:17,722 --> 00:14:19,399 from Dr. McKenzie? Dr. McKenzie? Daddy! 370 00:14:19,423 --> 00:14:21,401 Shush, will you? I'm on the line here. 371 00:14:21,425 --> 00:14:22,536 Excuse me. 372 00:14:22,560 --> 00:14:24,772 Yeah? Yeah, well, all right. 373 00:14:24,796 --> 00:14:27,441 Well, when he comes in, have him call us, will you? 374 00:14:27,465 --> 00:14:28,876 As quick as possibly. 375 00:14:28,900 --> 00:14:30,544 Yeah, thank you very much. 376 00:14:30,568 --> 00:14:32,513 Daddy, why did you go and call Dr. McKenzie? 377 00:14:32,537 --> 00:14:34,147 You knew I wanted Dr. Audrey Stern. 378 00:14:34,171 --> 00:14:35,349 How could you do that? 379 00:14:35,373 --> 00:14:37,585 Arch? What did Dr. McKenzie say? 380 00:14:37,609 --> 00:14:38,919 I didn't talk to him. 381 00:14:38,943 --> 00:14:40,420 Don't worry. They're trying to find him. 382 00:14:40,444 --> 00:14:42,623 He's gonna call us as soon as he comes in. 383 00:14:42,647 --> 00:14:43,891 Thanks, Arch. 384 00:14:43,915 --> 00:14:45,058 Thanks? 385 00:14:45,082 --> 00:14:46,861 Michael, you knew I didn't want Dr. McKenzie. 386 00:14:46,885 --> 00:14:48,796 I mean, we hadn't decided, had we? 387 00:14:48,820 --> 00:14:49,797 Well... 388 00:14:49,821 --> 00:14:51,231 I mean, you know Audrey Stern 389 00:14:51,255 --> 00:14:52,466 and you like her, right? 390 00:14:52,490 --> 00:14:53,467 Right. 391 00:14:53,491 --> 00:14:54,702 And she's a good surgeon? 392 00:14:54,726 --> 00:14:55,903 Right. So? 393 00:14:55,927 --> 00:14:59,439 So I'm glad Archie called Dr. McKenzie. 394 00:14:59,463 --> 00:15:01,308 Daddy, this is all your fault. 395 00:15:01,332 --> 00:15:04,044 Listen, little girl, one of the facts of life 396 00:15:04,068 --> 00:15:06,714 is that doctors are supposed to be men. 397 00:15:06,738 --> 00:15:08,916 Men invented medicine, didn't they? 398 00:15:08,940 --> 00:15:12,252 Men made up your Hypocritical Oath there. 399 00:15:12,276 --> 00:15:14,788 Women, if they want to be something, let them be nurses. 400 00:15:14,812 --> 00:15:16,790 That's a ridiculous argument, Daddy. 401 00:15:16,814 --> 00:15:19,426 Michael, here's your thermometer. 402 00:15:19,450 --> 00:15:20,594 Oh, thanks, Ma. 403 00:15:20,618 --> 00:15:23,196 Can I get you some more ice for your side? 404 00:15:23,220 --> 00:15:24,598 No, this is fine, Ma. 405 00:15:24,622 --> 00:15:27,434 Michael, we could get Audrey Stern here in a flash 406 00:15:27,458 --> 00:15:30,203 and save ourselves $200 at the same time, 407 00:15:30,227 --> 00:15:32,205 but no, you won't trust a woman. 408 00:15:32,229 --> 00:15:33,641 Gloria, that's not the point. 409 00:15:33,665 --> 00:15:35,275 I just want a good doctor! 410 00:15:35,299 --> 00:15:37,545 He's absolutely right. 411 00:15:37,569 --> 00:15:38,879 McKenzie costs more 412 00:15:38,903 --> 00:15:41,381 because the best always cost more. 413 00:15:41,405 --> 00:15:43,250 That's how you tell what's good in America. 414 00:15:43,274 --> 00:15:45,786 It costs more. 415 00:15:45,810 --> 00:15:51,547 Sometimes Marcus Welby don't charge nothing at all. 416 00:15:54,819 --> 00:15:58,599 And you can't get better than him. 417 00:15:58,623 --> 00:16:01,936 Maybe we ought to turn on the TV, Edith, 418 00:16:01,960 --> 00:16:05,272 and Welby will jump out of the set and help us. 419 00:16:05,296 --> 00:16:07,775 Daddy, McKenzie gets more than Audrey Stern 420 00:16:07,799 --> 00:16:09,777 because women are always underpaid. 421 00:16:09,801 --> 00:16:10,878 Look at Ma! 422 00:16:10,902 --> 00:16:12,479 What are you dragging her into it for? 423 00:16:12,503 --> 00:16:13,647 She don't work. 424 00:16:13,671 --> 00:16:16,116 Oh, no? What do you call housework, a vacation? 425 00:16:16,140 --> 00:16:17,451 Well, it ain't work. 426 00:16:17,475 --> 00:16:19,086 You never see nobody paying for it. 427 00:16:19,110 --> 00:16:21,154 No, you sure don't see Ma paid for it. 428 00:16:21,178 --> 00:16:25,559 No, I sure don't see me being paid for it. 429 00:16:25,583 --> 00:16:27,628 Will you stifle yourself over there? 430 00:16:27,652 --> 00:16:31,431 Well, housework is an important job, Archie. 431 00:16:31,455 --> 00:16:34,201 It's just as important as your job. 432 00:16:34,225 --> 00:16:37,137 That is a whole lot of baloney there, Edith. 433 00:16:37,161 --> 00:16:38,639 The man is the breadwinner 434 00:16:38,663 --> 00:16:40,608 and you women have your bread won for you. 435 00:16:40,632 --> 00:16:42,409 That's the way it is all over the world. 436 00:16:42,433 --> 00:16:44,344 You're wrong, Arch. There are plenty of tribes 437 00:16:44,368 --> 00:16:46,947 where the men sit at home and the women go out to work. 438 00:16:46,971 --> 00:16:48,148 Where, where, where? 439 00:16:48,172 --> 00:16:50,050 Well, there's a tribe in New Guinea... 440 00:16:50,074 --> 00:16:52,114 Don't be bringing the I-talians into it. 441 00:16:57,615 --> 00:16:59,860 God made women to stay at home. 442 00:16:59,884 --> 00:17:03,130 How do you know that, Archie? 443 00:17:03,154 --> 00:17:06,867 Because it's in the Bible, Edith. Look it up, huh? 444 00:17:06,891 --> 00:17:08,535 All them old Bible guys, 445 00:17:08,559 --> 00:17:10,971 they was always out there hunting and fishing. 446 00:17:10,995 --> 00:17:13,206 The women stayed home and had babies, 447 00:17:13,230 --> 00:17:15,208 which they called in them days "begotten," 448 00:17:15,232 --> 00:17:18,812 for religious reasons. 449 00:17:18,836 --> 00:17:20,147 And in between all the begotten, 450 00:17:20,171 --> 00:17:21,849 the women was sweeping up the tents, 451 00:17:21,873 --> 00:17:23,450 they was milking the cows, 452 00:17:23,474 --> 00:17:25,318 polishing up all the idols... 453 00:17:25,342 --> 00:17:26,854 102. 454 00:17:26,878 --> 00:17:28,158 As many as they had. 455 00:17:30,782 --> 00:17:34,461 No, that's my temperature. 456 00:17:34,485 --> 00:17:37,665 Yeah, I don't feel good at all. 457 00:17:37,689 --> 00:17:38,666 Oh. 458 00:17:38,690 --> 00:17:40,134 Michael, what's the matter? 459 00:17:40,158 --> 00:17:41,902 Oh, I don't feel good. Can I help? 460 00:17:41,926 --> 00:17:43,470 I'm sick. Get out of the way! 461 00:17:43,494 --> 00:17:44,838 What is it? Michael! 462 00:17:44,862 --> 00:17:46,506 Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! 463 00:17:46,530 --> 00:17:49,543 Now, this is awful. 464 00:17:49,567 --> 00:17:52,746 I better pack a bag for the hospital for him, 465 00:17:52,770 --> 00:17:54,314 just in case. 466 00:17:54,338 --> 00:17:56,316 What did Dr. McKenzie say? 467 00:17:56,340 --> 00:17:57,818 I didn't talk to him, Edith. 468 00:17:57,842 --> 00:17:59,219 They're trying to find the man. 469 00:17:59,243 --> 00:18:03,157 He could be on any golf course in town. 470 00:18:03,181 --> 00:18:06,026 Well, maybe we should've called Dr. Stern. 471 00:18:06,050 --> 00:18:07,561 She would've been here now. 472 00:18:07,585 --> 00:18:09,063 She's in the neighborhood. 473 00:18:09,087 --> 00:18:10,630 So is Thomas Eddy, the butcher, 474 00:18:10,654 --> 00:18:13,133 but I wouldn't call him for an operation. 475 00:18:13,157 --> 00:18:17,004 Ma? Michael threw up. He's really sick. 476 00:18:17,028 --> 00:18:18,772 I can't wait for Dr. McKenzie to call. 477 00:18:18,796 --> 00:18:20,841 I'm gonna call Audrey Stern right now. 478 00:18:22,299 --> 00:18:23,310 No! 479 00:18:23,334 --> 00:18:25,345 Hello? 480 00:18:25,369 --> 00:18:26,814 Yes. This is Mrs. Stivic. 481 00:18:26,838 --> 00:18:29,449 Oh, my husband is really sick. 482 00:18:29,473 --> 00:18:33,653 He has a temperature now of 102 and he just... 483 00:18:33,677 --> 00:18:35,622 The receiving room in a half an hour. 484 00:18:35,646 --> 00:18:37,758 Yes, we'll have him there. Thank you very much. 485 00:18:37,782 --> 00:18:39,426 Was that Dr. McKenzie? 486 00:18:39,450 --> 00:18:40,627 No, that was his nurse. 487 00:18:40,651 --> 00:18:42,662 She said to get Michael to the hospital right away. 488 00:18:42,686 --> 00:18:45,065 I'll pack the bag right now. 489 00:18:45,089 --> 00:18:47,634 McKenzie's gonna meet us there. 490 00:18:47,658 --> 00:18:49,502 I don't know how we're gonna pay him. 491 00:18:49,526 --> 00:18:50,838 Have you thought about that? 492 00:18:50,862 --> 00:18:52,372 Yeah, I thought about that. 493 00:18:52,396 --> 00:18:54,474 You ain't gonna pay him. What? 494 00:18:54,498 --> 00:18:55,743 I am. 495 00:18:55,767 --> 00:18:57,778 But Daddy, you can't do that. 496 00:18:57,802 --> 00:19:00,402 Now, don't be telling me what I can't do, little girl. 497 00:19:01,839 --> 00:19:03,884 But, Daddy, it's such a lot of money. 498 00:19:03,908 --> 00:19:05,485 Yeah, I know it's a lot of money. 499 00:19:05,509 --> 00:19:08,155 All right, youse pay me back whenever you can. 500 00:19:08,179 --> 00:19:10,539 I'll put it on the meathead's tab. 501 00:19:13,251 --> 00:19:15,462 Daddy, that's so sweet of you. 502 00:19:15,486 --> 00:19:17,430 Don't be slobbering me like your mother, now. 503 00:19:17,454 --> 00:19:18,465 That's from Michael too. 504 00:19:18,489 --> 00:19:20,033 Now, wait a minute, wait a minute. 505 00:19:20,057 --> 00:19:21,534 Wait a minute. Come here. 506 00:19:21,558 --> 00:19:23,670 Now, don't tell Michael nothing about my paying for that. 507 00:19:23,694 --> 00:19:25,472 I don't want him to know nothing about it. 508 00:19:25,496 --> 00:19:27,474 But, Daddy, Michael should know. 509 00:19:27,498 --> 00:19:30,377 I mean, you're doing such a nice thing for him. 510 00:19:30,401 --> 00:19:34,614 Well, after all, you know, he's, uh... 511 00:19:34,638 --> 00:19:37,717 the only meathead you got, right? 512 00:19:37,741 --> 00:19:40,353 Daddy, sometimes I could just... 513 00:19:40,377 --> 00:19:43,723 And then sometimes you're... 514 00:19:43,747 --> 00:19:45,125 Thank you, Daddy. 515 00:19:45,149 --> 00:19:47,669 All right, let me make a phone call for a cab. 516 00:19:48,752 --> 00:19:49,997 Oh, boy. 517 00:19:50,021 --> 00:19:52,132 Michael, are you feeling a little bit better now? 518 00:19:52,156 --> 00:19:54,301 Yeah, a little bit better. The ice pack is helping. 519 00:19:54,325 --> 00:19:55,936 Oh, good, because we're gonna take you 520 00:19:55,960 --> 00:19:57,437 to the hospital, right away. 521 00:19:57,461 --> 00:19:58,638 Huh? 522 00:19:58,662 --> 00:20:00,240 Just come on. Sit down right over here. 523 00:20:00,264 --> 00:20:01,608 Ma's getting your bag. 524 00:20:01,632 --> 00:20:03,610 Here it is, all packed. 525 00:20:03,634 --> 00:20:05,412 Well, I don't know about going to the hospital. 526 00:20:05,436 --> 00:20:06,780 I mean, I feel better now. 527 00:20:06,804 --> 00:20:09,016 Oh, it's just like going to the dentist. 528 00:20:09,040 --> 00:20:10,550 When you know you're going, 529 00:20:10,574 --> 00:20:12,820 your tooth always stops aching. 530 00:20:12,844 --> 00:20:15,022 Yeah. I wish this were a tooth. 531 00:20:15,046 --> 00:20:16,456 Oh, no, Mike. 532 00:20:16,480 --> 00:20:22,551 It would be much more serious if there was a tooth down there. 533 00:20:27,658 --> 00:20:30,070 What was that, Ma? 534 00:20:30,094 --> 00:20:32,840 Well, you would have to have swallowed it 535 00:20:32,864 --> 00:20:34,241 like a cherry pit, 536 00:20:34,265 --> 00:20:37,177 and it would've got stuck in your appendix. 537 00:20:37,201 --> 00:20:38,378 Stop, Ma. 538 00:20:38,402 --> 00:20:41,748 When Mrs. Wiedermeyer had her appendix out, 539 00:20:41,772 --> 00:20:45,118 the doctor said it was an apple seed stuck in there. 540 00:20:45,142 --> 00:20:47,120 Stop, Ma. 541 00:20:47,144 --> 00:20:53,026 And, um, it... It puffed out like a big balloon, 542 00:20:53,050 --> 00:20:56,718 and the doctor got to it just before it blew up. 543 00:20:58,356 --> 00:21:00,700 I think I'm sick again. 544 00:21:00,724 --> 00:21:01,902 All right, we're all set. 545 00:21:01,926 --> 00:21:04,104 I called a cab. It'll be over in a few minutes. 546 00:21:04,128 --> 00:21:06,106 Oh, gee, I'm not looking forward to this at all. 547 00:21:06,130 --> 00:21:07,140 Don't worry, sweetheart. 548 00:21:07,164 --> 00:21:08,742 I'm gonna be right there with you. 549 00:21:08,766 --> 00:21:10,744 Ma, did you remember to pack everything? 550 00:21:10,768 --> 00:21:13,080 Uh, his toothbrush and his razor? 551 00:21:13,104 --> 00:21:14,948 Ah, he won't need no razor in the hospital. 552 00:21:14,972 --> 00:21:16,350 If there's any shaving to be done, 553 00:21:16,374 --> 00:21:17,839 they know where to do it. 554 00:21:23,514 --> 00:21:25,192 I think I got everything. 555 00:21:25,216 --> 00:21:27,694 Did you remember his teddy bear? 556 00:21:27,718 --> 00:21:28,762 Stop it, Daddy. 557 00:21:28,786 --> 00:21:30,563 I'm only trying to cheer him up. 558 00:21:30,587 --> 00:21:33,767 His pajamas. I forgot his pajamas. 559 00:21:33,791 --> 00:21:35,102 I'll get them... Aah! 560 00:21:35,126 --> 00:21:36,770 Michael, wait! 561 00:21:36,794 --> 00:21:38,838 Michael, what's the matter? 562 00:21:38,862 --> 00:21:40,229 The ice pack slipped! 563 00:21:51,409 --> 00:21:52,619 Is he all right, doctor? 564 00:21:52,643 --> 00:21:53,921 Yes, he's fine. 565 00:21:53,945 --> 00:21:55,455 He'll be coming around any minute now. 566 00:21:55,479 --> 00:21:58,292 Any problems with the operation there, doc? 567 00:21:58,316 --> 00:21:59,326 No, no problems at all. 568 00:21:59,350 --> 00:22:01,216 That appendix came out like a loose cork. 569 00:22:03,921 --> 00:22:05,899 But you didn't get him here a minute too soon. 570 00:22:05,923 --> 00:22:07,700 We had to rush him straight onto the table. 571 00:22:07,724 --> 00:22:09,169 Oh, my. 572 00:22:09,193 --> 00:22:13,329 It's lucky nobody else was lying on it. 573 00:22:15,833 --> 00:22:17,710 Yeah. 574 00:22:17,734 --> 00:22:20,869 Archie, don't Mike look well? 575 00:22:23,707 --> 00:22:28,021 First time I ever seen him his mouth wasn't working. 576 00:22:28,045 --> 00:22:30,890 I can't thank you enough, Dr. McKenzie. 577 00:22:30,914 --> 00:22:33,126 Uh... Oh, I'm not Dr. McKenzie. 578 00:22:33,150 --> 00:22:34,694 I'm the anesthetist. 579 00:22:34,718 --> 00:22:38,165 Dr. McKenzie will be here any minute. 580 00:22:38,189 --> 00:22:39,621 Oh, here she is now. 581 00:22:44,128 --> 00:22:46,440 Are you really Dr. McKenzie? 582 00:22:46,464 --> 00:22:47,474 Yes. 583 00:22:50,734 --> 00:22:54,036 It's very nice to meet you. I'm Mrs. Stivic. 584 00:22:55,772 --> 00:22:58,151 How do you do? 585 00:22:58,175 --> 00:22:59,453 What's so funny? 586 00:22:59,477 --> 00:23:01,388 Oh, forgive me for laughing, doctor, 587 00:23:01,412 --> 00:23:03,923 but my father though that you were an old man 588 00:23:03,947 --> 00:23:05,925 and I'm glad you're not. 589 00:23:05,949 --> 00:23:07,394 So am I. 590 00:23:07,418 --> 00:23:08,828 Daddy, would you come over here 591 00:23:08,852 --> 00:23:09,829 for a second, please? 592 00:23:09,853 --> 00:23:11,264 I have to talk to you. 593 00:23:11,288 --> 00:23:12,632 What? Come here. 594 00:23:12,656 --> 00:23:15,602 I... I just want to know what you think now. 595 00:23:15,626 --> 00:23:17,337 I mean, the operation's a success, 596 00:23:17,361 --> 00:23:19,939 and it was done by a woman doctor, 597 00:23:19,963 --> 00:23:22,283 and Michael's keister's still on. 598 00:23:49,160 --> 00:23:51,538 Look at him eating over here. 599 00:23:51,562 --> 00:23:53,173 Got his appendix out, 600 00:23:53,197 --> 00:23:56,143 so now he's got more room down there. 601 00:23:56,167 --> 00:23:58,011 You're not going to get me angry, Arch. 602 00:23:58,035 --> 00:24:00,713 I feel great. The operation was sensation... 603 00:24:00,737 --> 00:24:01,714 Oh, don't go on 604 00:24:01,738 --> 00:24:02,982 talking about the operation, will you? 605 00:24:03,006 --> 00:24:04,051 We're sick of it. 606 00:24:04,075 --> 00:24:05,852 Oh, no, I want to hear about it 607 00:24:05,876 --> 00:24:07,287 so I can remember it. 608 00:24:07,311 --> 00:24:08,888 What do you want to remember it for? 609 00:24:08,912 --> 00:24:10,090 You writing a book or something? 610 00:24:10,114 --> 00:24:12,426 No, it's for Sybil Gooley. 611 00:24:12,450 --> 00:24:15,228 She's always telling me about her operation, 612 00:24:15,252 --> 00:24:18,631 and now I got an operation to tell her about. 613 00:24:18,655 --> 00:24:21,768 You don't mind if I use yours, do you, Mike? 614 00:24:21,792 --> 00:24:23,703 No, Ma, just make sure to tell her 615 00:24:23,727 --> 00:24:25,539 how good Dr. McKenzie was. 616 00:24:25,563 --> 00:24:28,275 Well, hooray for our side. 617 00:24:28,299 --> 00:24:31,478 One giant step for womankind. 618 00:24:31,502 --> 00:24:33,513 I wish the womankind at this table 619 00:24:33,537 --> 00:24:35,748 would take one giant step into the kitchen 620 00:24:35,772 --> 00:24:37,884 and come back with some ketchup. 621 00:24:37,908 --> 00:24:39,319 No, Ma, you sit right there 622 00:24:39,343 --> 00:24:40,487 and enjoy your dinner. 623 00:24:40,511 --> 00:24:41,688 If Daddy wants the ketchup, 624 00:24:41,712 --> 00:24:43,090 he can get it for himself. 625 00:24:43,114 --> 00:24:45,092 Who the hell are you... 626 00:25:08,639 --> 00:25:10,584 All in the Family was recorded on tape 627 00:25:10,608 --> 00:25:13,342 before a live audience. 44878

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.