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♪ Boy, the way
Glenn Miller played ♪
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00:00:07,573 --> 00:00:11,219
♪ Songs that made
The Hit Parade ♪
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00:00:11,243 --> 00:00:14,890
♪ Guys like us We had it made ♪
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00:00:14,914 --> 00:00:18,159
♪ Those were the days ♪
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00:00:18,183 --> 00:00:22,163
♪ And you knew
Where you were then ♪
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00:00:22,187 --> 00:00:25,501
♪ Girls were girls
And men were men ♪
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00:00:25,525 --> 00:00:32,273
♪ Mister, we could use a man
Like Herbert Hoover again ♪
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00:00:32,297 --> 00:00:34,242
♪ Didn't need No welfare state ♪
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00:00:34,266 --> 00:00:38,413
♪ Everybody pulled His weight ♪
10
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♪ Gee, our old
LaSalle Ran great ♪
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♪ Those were the days ♪♪
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00:01:08,834 --> 00:01:09,878
What the hell is this,
13
00:01:09,902 --> 00:01:11,822
the Christian Science
reading room?
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00:01:15,007 --> 00:01:17,986
Archie, I'm sorry.
15
00:01:18,010 --> 00:01:19,888
I didn't expect you so early.
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00:01:19,912 --> 00:01:21,156
I was just reading the paper.
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Oh, no. Don't think
nothing of it, Edith.
18
00:01:23,749 --> 00:01:24,860
Think nothing of it.
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00:01:24,884 --> 00:01:26,595
Jeez, I could get
jollier welcomes
20
00:01:26,619 --> 00:01:29,230
down at the morgue.
21
00:01:29,254 --> 00:01:31,033
Archie, you were only
gone a couple of hours.
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What do you want,
a 21-gun salute?
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00:01:33,192 --> 00:01:35,771
Would you stand up and
cheer if it was me at the door?
24
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Well, that depends, Meathead,
25
00:01:36,963 --> 00:01:39,323
on whether you was
coming in or going out.
26
00:01:41,834 --> 00:01:44,345
Did you have a nice afternoon?
27
00:01:44,369 --> 00:01:46,715
No, I didn't have a
nice afternoon, Edith.
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Sometimes, I wonder
29
00:01:47,740 --> 00:01:49,317
if this part-time cab driving
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00:01:49,341 --> 00:01:50,385
is worth my while.
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00:01:50,409 --> 00:01:52,187
You know, it used
to be New York was
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00:01:52,211 --> 00:01:53,388
full of dudes grabbing cabs
33
00:01:53,412 --> 00:01:55,490
to take their
girlfriends to shows.
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00:01:55,514 --> 00:01:57,626
Now all you see around town is
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00:01:57,650 --> 00:01:59,970
drifters, weirdoes
and pre-verts.
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00:02:02,521 --> 00:02:05,188
Out of the chair.
37
00:02:09,762 --> 00:02:11,439
Trying to pick up a
fare these weekends
38
00:02:11,463 --> 00:02:15,644
is like trolling for sardines
with a basketball net.
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00:02:15,668 --> 00:02:19,247
Well, maybe folks is
walking more for exercise.
40
00:02:19,271 --> 00:02:20,983
They're walking more, Edith,
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00:02:21,007 --> 00:02:22,684
because they ain't
got no mazuma.
42
00:02:22,708 --> 00:02:25,153
They gotta make a choice
between cabs or butter,
43
00:02:25,177 --> 00:02:26,554
and they're choosing butter.
44
00:02:26,578 --> 00:02:31,414
Oh, they ought to try
margarine. It ain't so expensive.
45
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Will you get me a beer?
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Right away.
47
00:02:36,722 --> 00:02:38,199
Everything's expensive nowadays.
48
00:02:38,223 --> 00:02:39,901
It's this inflation.
49
00:02:39,925 --> 00:02:41,937
The money in this
here country is sick.
50
00:02:41,961 --> 00:02:43,538
Yeah, like the
people who control it.
51
00:02:43,562 --> 00:02:46,074
Well, when you
control some of it,
52
00:02:46,098 --> 00:02:48,877
I'll listen to your views.
53
00:02:48,901 --> 00:02:50,445
Meantime, you can
mail your opinions
54
00:02:50,469 --> 00:02:51,835
back to the Kremlin, huh?
55
00:02:53,372 --> 00:02:55,350
I thought Nixon's
wage and price freeze
56
00:02:55,374 --> 00:02:57,352
was supposed to fix everything.
57
00:02:57,376 --> 00:02:59,788
Oh... it's fixing me good.
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00:02:59,812 --> 00:03:01,456
It's about time some
politician spoke up
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00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:02,490
for the little fellas.
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00:03:02,514 --> 00:03:03,859
You got McGovern.
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00:03:03,883 --> 00:03:06,061
I also got a headache, Meathead,
62
00:03:06,085 --> 00:03:08,085
and I don't need
neither one of them.
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00:03:12,024 --> 00:03:16,604
Oh, gee, lucky me, I
got the book section.
64
00:03:16,628 --> 00:03:17,673
Look at this here.
65
00:03:17,697 --> 00:03:20,575
Come on, come on. All boats in.
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00:03:20,599 --> 00:03:22,978
Arch, you can only read
one section at a time.
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00:03:23,002 --> 00:03:24,579
Well, I want to
look 'em all over
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00:03:24,603 --> 00:03:25,947
so I can choose which one.
69
00:03:25,971 --> 00:03:27,215
Now, come on, gimme, gimme.
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00:03:27,239 --> 00:03:29,184
Here's your beer, Archie.
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00:03:29,208 --> 00:03:30,185
All right, Edith.
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00:03:30,209 --> 00:03:31,787
Just leave it there, huh?
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00:03:31,811 --> 00:03:33,088
Oh, look at this, will ya?
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00:03:33,112 --> 00:03:36,058
Meat prices up again by 8%.
75
00:03:36,082 --> 00:03:38,126
Maybe we ought
to turn vegetarian.
76
00:03:38,150 --> 00:03:40,261
It'd be cheaper and healthier.
77
00:03:40,285 --> 00:03:41,830
Well, I ain't turning that
78
00:03:41,854 --> 00:03:42,998
because it ain't natural.
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00:03:43,022 --> 00:03:45,222
Man was put on
this earth to eat meat.
80
00:03:47,626 --> 00:03:48,737
Who says so?
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00:03:48,761 --> 00:03:51,439
Who says so? The
Bible says so, dumbbell.
82
00:03:51,463 --> 00:03:52,674
Where does it say that?
83
00:03:52,698 --> 00:03:56,111
Aw, come on, will
ya? I mean, look it up.
84
00:03:56,135 --> 00:03:58,180
Jeez, all them old Bible people,
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00:03:58,204 --> 00:03:59,614
they was always eating meat
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00:03:59,638 --> 00:04:01,958
as soon as they found out
that eating apples was wrong.
87
00:04:07,346 --> 00:04:09,157
That's true. On
special occasions...
88
00:04:09,181 --> 00:04:10,625
Goats and lambs.
89
00:04:10,649 --> 00:04:12,027
Who the hell ever
heard of sacrificing
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00:04:12,051 --> 00:04:14,017
a head of lettuce? You?
91
00:04:22,194 --> 00:04:23,571
What happened here?
92
00:04:23,595 --> 00:04:25,841
What's the matter with
this little piece of the paper?
93
00:04:25,865 --> 00:04:27,275
Oh, I took that, Daddy.
94
00:04:27,299 --> 00:04:28,509
It's of no interest to you.
95
00:04:28,533 --> 00:04:29,577
Oh, I see.
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00:04:29,601 --> 00:04:31,747
It's out of the
employment section here.
97
00:04:31,771 --> 00:04:32,981
What's happening?
98
00:04:33,005 --> 00:04:34,983
Don't tell me Meathead
is looking for work.
99
00:04:35,007 --> 00:04:36,118
No, he isn't.
100
00:04:36,142 --> 00:04:38,120
Yeah, well, what are you doing?
101
00:04:38,144 --> 00:04:39,520
You trying to save
him from reading
102
00:04:39,544 --> 00:04:41,278
the embarrassing parts?
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00:04:42,447 --> 00:04:43,691
No, Daddy.
104
00:04:43,715 --> 00:04:45,293
I'm the one that's
applying for a job.
105
00:04:45,317 --> 00:04:48,764
Hold it, hold it. You're
applying for what?
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00:04:48,788 --> 00:04:49,798
A job.
107
00:04:49,822 --> 00:04:51,399
You just said
yourself how tough it is
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00:04:51,423 --> 00:04:52,500
to make ends meet.
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00:04:52,524 --> 00:04:54,803
Oh, no, you ain't
applying for no job.
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00:04:54,827 --> 00:04:56,404
A woman's place
is still in the home.
111
00:04:56,428 --> 00:04:58,640
Oh, that's ridiculous.
112
00:04:58,664 --> 00:05:00,275
Besides, it's only
three days a week
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00:05:00,299 --> 00:05:02,310
behind the cosmetic
counter at Kresslers.
114
00:05:02,334 --> 00:05:04,045
Yeah, Arch. It'll mean
a few more dollars
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00:05:04,069 --> 00:05:05,769
coming into the house.
116
00:05:10,976 --> 00:05:15,991
Listen to this disgusting
comment over here.
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00:05:16,015 --> 00:05:18,160
You know, there
is a word for a guy
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00:05:18,184 --> 00:05:19,494
that lives off his wife.
119
00:05:19,518 --> 00:05:20,678
You ever hear of a gig-olo?
120
00:05:25,657 --> 00:05:26,634
Look at this.
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00:05:26,658 --> 00:05:28,804
Dogs off the coffee table.
122
00:05:28,828 --> 00:05:29,871
All right.
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00:05:29,895 --> 00:05:31,273
Even when Edith and me was broke
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00:05:31,297 --> 00:05:32,274
when we was first married,
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00:05:32,298 --> 00:05:33,675
I never sent her out to work.
126
00:05:33,699 --> 00:05:36,377
Families was proud in
them days, right, Edith?
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00:05:36,401 --> 00:05:38,735
Yeah, and hungry.
128
00:05:40,306 --> 00:05:42,784
Can't you just say
yeah and stop?
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00:05:42,808 --> 00:05:45,187
Times have changed, Daddy.
130
00:05:45,211 --> 00:05:46,454
Well, as far as I'm concerned,
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00:05:46,478 --> 00:05:47,856
they've changed for the worse.
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00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:49,057
What the hell is the sense
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00:05:49,081 --> 00:05:50,258
of talking to yous two, anyhow.
134
00:05:50,282 --> 00:05:51,259
Just get away from me.
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00:05:51,283 --> 00:05:52,460
Leave me alone, all of yous.
136
00:05:52,484 --> 00:05:53,728
I wanna watch TV.
137
00:05:53,752 --> 00:05:55,530
We delay the start
of the roller derby
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00:05:55,554 --> 00:05:57,498
to bring you an editorial
by Mr. Lyle Bennett,
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00:05:57,522 --> 00:05:59,868
general manager of
this station. Mr. Bennett.
140
00:05:59,892 --> 00:06:02,871
Aw, jeez, this bigmouth again.
141
00:06:02,895 --> 00:06:04,439
Why can't you give it a rest?
142
00:06:04,463 --> 00:06:06,274
What's it about?
143
00:06:06,298 --> 00:06:08,009
It's always about
the same three things:
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00:06:08,033 --> 00:06:10,445
pollution, dope, or VD...
I'm sick and tired of all three.
145
00:06:10,469 --> 00:06:12,347
I'd like to hear
what he's got to say,
146
00:06:12,371 --> 00:06:14,282
all right?
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00:06:14,306 --> 00:06:17,418
This terrible virus that
has infected the country.
148
00:06:17,442 --> 00:06:18,887
What'd I tell you? VD.
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00:06:18,911 --> 00:06:22,490
There's been much talk
about our permissive society.
150
00:06:22,514 --> 00:06:23,758
Well, this is an evil
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00:06:23,782 --> 00:06:26,161
that we have
permitted for too long.
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00:06:26,185 --> 00:06:27,362
Don't tell me the bigmouth is
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00:06:27,386 --> 00:06:28,763
talking sense for a change.
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00:06:28,787 --> 00:06:29,797
Quiet, will ya?
155
00:06:29,821 --> 00:06:31,066
The state must be willing
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00:06:31,090 --> 00:06:33,935
to buy back every
gun in private hands.
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00:06:33,959 --> 00:06:34,936
What?
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00:06:34,960 --> 00:06:36,104
He's talking about guns.
159
00:06:36,128 --> 00:06:39,574
What the hell has
guns got to do with VD?
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00:06:39,598 --> 00:06:40,909
Will you listen to the man?
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00:06:40,933 --> 00:06:44,445
Only by enforcing
even tougher gun laws
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00:06:44,469 --> 00:06:48,316
can the tide of violence
and death be halted.
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00:06:48,340 --> 00:06:50,986
Guns must go before
more of them go off.
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00:06:51,010 --> 00:06:53,388
Well, that's where you're
going, buddy boy... off.
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00:06:53,412 --> 00:06:56,624
Hey, what are
you doing that for?
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00:06:56,648 --> 00:06:58,426
I wanted to hear
what he had to say.
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00:06:58,450 --> 00:07:02,964
He's a fairy like all of
them gun-control guys.
168
00:07:02,988 --> 00:07:04,399
I'm for gun control.
169
00:07:04,423 --> 00:07:05,500
Tell it to her.
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00:07:05,524 --> 00:07:07,335
Maybe she'll get the
marriage annulled.
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00:07:07,359 --> 00:07:08,937
Oh, Daddy!
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00:07:08,961 --> 00:07:11,072
Archie, what do guns
have to do with maleness?
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00:07:11,096 --> 00:07:13,808
"What do guns have
to do with maleness"?
174
00:07:13,832 --> 00:07:15,076
Duke Wayne, buddy.
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00:07:15,100 --> 00:07:16,144
What?
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00:07:16,168 --> 00:07:17,678
Clint Westwood there, buddy.
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00:07:17,702 --> 00:07:18,947
What are you talking about?
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00:07:18,971 --> 00:07:21,016
Gary Cooper, Sergeant
York... Get out of here.
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00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:22,617
I could go on and on and on,
180
00:07:22,641 --> 00:07:23,818
but it'll do you no good,
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00:07:23,842 --> 00:07:24,852
because talking to you
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00:07:24,876 --> 00:07:27,022
is like casting
pearls into wine.
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00:07:27,046 --> 00:07:29,991
No guns, eh?
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00:07:30,015 --> 00:07:32,360
Tell that to old lady
Heinzegger down the street...
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00:07:32,384 --> 00:07:33,428
"no guns."
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00:07:33,452 --> 00:07:35,096
She'd have been
glad to have a rod
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00:07:35,120 --> 00:07:36,697
when them two
burglars busted in on her
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00:07:36,721 --> 00:07:37,933
last week, huh, Edith?
189
00:07:37,957 --> 00:07:39,600
Archie, how do you expect
an 88-year-old woman
190
00:07:39,624 --> 00:07:41,002
to go around carrying a gun?
191
00:07:41,026 --> 00:07:42,003
I don't know!
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00:07:42,027 --> 00:07:43,671
She can carry it in
her elastic stocking
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00:07:43,695 --> 00:07:47,409
next to her very-close veins.
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00:07:47,433 --> 00:07:49,177
All I know is that
as an American
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00:07:49,201 --> 00:07:51,046
it is my right to pack a rod.
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00:07:51,070 --> 00:07:52,047
Bull!
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00:07:52,071 --> 00:07:53,081
What do you mean?
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00:07:53,105 --> 00:07:54,416
Bull to the Constitution?
199
00:07:54,440 --> 00:07:56,017
It doesn't say that in
the Constitution, Arch!
200
00:07:56,041 --> 00:07:57,152
I'll prove it to you.
201
00:07:57,176 --> 00:07:59,354
I got a copy of it here
in my history book.
202
00:07:59,378 --> 00:08:01,156
It's right there in your
Second Amendment.
203
00:08:01,180 --> 00:08:02,424
Oh, no, Archie.
204
00:08:02,448 --> 00:08:03,858
That's the one that says
205
00:08:03,882 --> 00:08:06,216
"Thou shalt not make
any graven image."
206
00:08:09,521 --> 00:08:11,433
That ain't the
Constitution, Edith.
207
00:08:11,457 --> 00:08:13,497
What you said is the
Gettysburg Address.
208
00:08:15,027 --> 00:08:17,005
I'll prove you don't know
what you're talking about.
209
00:08:17,029 --> 00:08:18,139
You just look it up.
210
00:08:18,163 --> 00:08:19,540
All I know, it's my
God-given right
211
00:08:19,564 --> 00:08:20,541
as an American
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00:08:20,565 --> 00:08:21,943
to have a gun in the house.
213
00:08:21,967 --> 00:08:22,944
It is not, Archie.
214
00:08:22,968 --> 00:08:24,145
The Supreme Court ruled on that
215
00:08:24,169 --> 00:08:25,213
as far back as 1939.
216
00:08:25,237 --> 00:08:26,781
What the Supreme Court says
217
00:08:26,805 --> 00:08:30,151
ain't got nothing
to do with the law!
218
00:08:30,175 --> 00:08:31,453
They okayed bussing too,
219
00:08:31,477 --> 00:08:33,421
till President Nixon
give 'em the old one-two.
220
00:08:33,445 --> 00:08:34,589
All right. Here it is.
221
00:08:34,613 --> 00:08:35,991
Amendment Two...
I'll read it to you.
222
00:08:36,015 --> 00:08:37,825
Don't read nothing.
I can read myself.
223
00:08:37,849 --> 00:08:39,461
What does it say...
Here, here, here...
224
00:08:39,485 --> 00:08:41,463
"The right of the people
to keep and bear arms
225
00:08:41,487 --> 00:08:42,663
shall not be infringed."
226
00:08:42,687 --> 00:08:43,764
Read that.
227
00:08:43,788 --> 00:08:45,566
Wait a second. You
didn't read all of it!
228
00:08:45,590 --> 00:08:47,235
You did not! Look, look.
229
00:08:47,259 --> 00:08:49,604
"A well-regulated
militia, being necessary
230
00:08:49,628 --> 00:08:51,373
"to the security
of a free state,
231
00:08:51,397 --> 00:08:53,375
"the right of the people
to keep and bear arms
232
00:08:53,399 --> 00:08:54,476
shall not be infringed."
233
00:08:54,500 --> 00:08:55,477
"A militia," Arch.
234
00:08:55,501 --> 00:08:56,677
That's what it says right there.
235
00:08:56,701 --> 00:08:58,079
Listen, buddy. I
don't pay no attention
236
00:08:58,103 --> 00:09:00,637
to no Constitution in
them pinko books of yours.
237
00:09:03,108 --> 00:09:05,686
Did you know that 65%
of the people murdered
238
00:09:05,710 --> 00:09:08,156
in the last 10 years
were killed by handguns?
239
00:09:08,180 --> 00:09:10,325
Would it make you
feel any better, little girl,
240
00:09:10,349 --> 00:09:12,269
if they was pushed
out of windows?
241
00:09:14,053 --> 00:09:16,431
Wow, that's convoluted logic.
242
00:09:16,455 --> 00:09:18,599
Yes, and that's the
kind of straight thinking
243
00:09:18,623 --> 00:09:20,835
I'm trying to put across here.
244
00:09:20,859 --> 00:09:23,271
I hate that jerk on TV.
245
00:09:23,295 --> 00:09:24,805
Oh, I get it. I get it.
246
00:09:24,829 --> 00:09:26,641
When you thought he
was talking about VD
247
00:09:26,665 --> 00:09:27,642
and a permissive society,
248
00:09:27,666 --> 00:09:29,044
he was smart, huh?
249
00:09:29,068 --> 00:09:31,446
You find out he was talking
about gun control, he's a jerk?
250
00:09:31,470 --> 00:09:32,847
I'm going to prove it to you.
251
00:09:32,871 --> 00:09:35,250
How many people in the
US would like to have guns?
252
00:09:35,274 --> 00:09:36,451
Too many. Thousands.
253
00:09:36,475 --> 00:09:39,476
But how many people
would like to have VD?
254
00:09:46,952 --> 00:09:48,696
None, but what
does that got to...
255
00:09:48,720 --> 00:09:49,697
Case closed, buddy! Case closed!
256
00:09:49,721 --> 00:09:50,998
Get out of here. Come on.
257
00:09:53,024 --> 00:09:54,702
I'll get it.
258
00:09:54,726 --> 00:09:56,504
What do guns have to do with VD?
259
00:09:56,528 --> 00:09:58,339
Michael, there's no sense
in even arguing with him.
260
00:09:58,363 --> 00:09:59,541
There's somebody at the door.
261
00:09:59,565 --> 00:10:01,209
Oh, hello, Lionel. Come in.
262
00:10:01,233 --> 00:10:02,677
Oh, no thanks, Mrs. Bunker.
263
00:10:02,701 --> 00:10:05,080
I mean, I don't want to disturb
your quiet evening at home.
264
00:10:05,104 --> 00:10:07,615
My mom just asked me
to drop off your cookbook.
265
00:10:07,639 --> 00:10:09,750
Wait a minute, wait
a minute, Lionel.
266
00:10:09,774 --> 00:10:11,486
Come on in. We're
having a little discussion.
267
00:10:11,510 --> 00:10:12,687
I want to ask you something.
268
00:10:12,711 --> 00:10:13,888
Get out of the way, Edith.
269
00:10:13,912 --> 00:10:15,490
Oh, I got to go.
Sorry, Mr. Bunker...
270
00:10:15,514 --> 00:10:16,824
This will only take a minute.
271
00:10:16,848 --> 00:10:18,025
Come on, now, here's a guy
272
00:10:18,049 --> 00:10:19,227
who's sure to agree with me.
273
00:10:19,251 --> 00:10:21,829
Lionel, what do your
people think about guns?
274
00:10:21,853 --> 00:10:26,634
Well, that depends
on who's holding them.
275
00:10:26,658 --> 00:10:28,903
Daddy, how can you
be against gun control
276
00:10:28,927 --> 00:10:30,605
with all the assassinations?
277
00:10:30,629 --> 00:10:33,274
Look at it... the Kennedys
and Martin Luther King,
278
00:10:33,298 --> 00:10:35,510
and what about the shooting
of Governor Wallace?
279
00:10:35,534 --> 00:10:37,278
I'm saying maybe
Governor Wallace
280
00:10:37,302 --> 00:10:39,502
wouldn't have got shot
if had a rod in his mitt.
281
00:10:41,873 --> 00:10:45,086
Because the governor was
there. He could have shot first.
282
00:10:45,110 --> 00:10:46,287
Archie, what would he be doing
283
00:10:46,311 --> 00:10:48,323
walking around in
a crowd with a gun?
284
00:10:48,347 --> 00:10:51,025
What was the other bum
doing in a crowd with a gun?
285
00:10:51,049 --> 00:10:52,460
That's ridiculous, Archie!
286
00:10:52,484 --> 00:10:53,661
You're talking
about a human being
287
00:10:53,685 --> 00:10:56,063
who may be in a wheelchair
for the rest of his life.
288
00:10:56,087 --> 00:10:58,366
Yes, and if that human
being had had a rod,
289
00:10:58,390 --> 00:11:01,536
then the other human being
would be in a wheelchair.
290
00:11:01,560 --> 00:11:03,404
Excuse me, but, Lionel,
291
00:11:03,428 --> 00:11:04,805
we're gonna be
late for the show.
292
00:11:04,829 --> 00:11:05,806
Hi, Judy.
293
00:11:05,830 --> 00:11:06,807
Hi, everybody.
294
00:11:06,831 --> 00:11:07,808
Hold it, hold it.
295
00:11:07,832 --> 00:11:09,177
Judy? Who's Judy over here?
296
00:11:09,201 --> 00:11:11,045
How come everybody
knows Judy but me?
297
00:11:11,069 --> 00:11:12,713
Well, maybe that's
because you never met her.
298
00:11:12,737 --> 00:11:14,182
Mr. Bunker, this is Judy.
299
00:11:14,206 --> 00:11:15,283
Hello. It's nice meeting you.
300
00:11:15,307 --> 00:11:16,284
Hiya, pleased to meet you.
301
00:11:16,308 --> 00:11:18,286
Well, it's very
nice, young lady.
302
00:11:18,310 --> 00:11:19,870
I mean, your going
out with Lionel here.
303
00:11:21,213 --> 00:11:22,690
I didn't know you
done that, Lionel.
304
00:11:22,714 --> 00:11:24,025
You're dating, huh?
305
00:11:24,049 --> 00:11:27,862
Oh, yeah, yeah, sure.
We does all them things.
306
00:11:27,886 --> 00:11:29,830
We dates, gets married.
307
00:11:29,854 --> 00:11:32,200
Where'd you think
we all came from?
308
00:11:32,224 --> 00:11:33,201
Well, bye, everybody.
309
00:11:33,225 --> 00:11:34,202
So long.
310
00:11:34,226 --> 00:11:35,203
Goodbye.
311
00:11:35,227 --> 00:11:36,937
Bye there. Bye.
312
00:11:36,961 --> 00:11:38,239
Daddy.
313
00:11:38,263 --> 00:11:41,242
I will never understand
your attitude about guns.
314
00:11:41,266 --> 00:11:43,811
You will never understand my
attitude about guns. Why not?
315
00:11:43,835 --> 00:11:45,880
What does it take to get
through to you, Archie?
316
00:11:45,904 --> 00:11:47,415
You know, England
has gun control,
317
00:11:47,439 --> 00:11:49,517
and they had less than 10
handgun murders last year.
318
00:11:49,541 --> 00:11:51,352
The United States
had over 8,000.
319
00:11:51,376 --> 00:11:52,720
Those are statistics.
320
00:11:52,744 --> 00:11:56,123
Don't feed me no sta-stistics.
Look at the facts here:
321
00:11:56,147 --> 00:11:59,727
England, in World
War II, nearly lost.
322
00:11:59,751 --> 00:12:01,529
We had to go over
and pull them out.
323
00:12:01,553 --> 00:12:02,530
Why did they nearly lose?
324
00:12:02,554 --> 00:12:04,265
Because they
didn't have no guns,
325
00:12:04,289 --> 00:12:08,436
because, in my opinion,
England is a fag country.
326
00:12:08,460 --> 00:12:09,437
That's crazy.
327
00:12:09,461 --> 00:12:10,672
I know it's crazy,
328
00:12:10,696 --> 00:12:12,607
but they don't never
tell you that on TV.
329
00:12:12,631 --> 00:12:15,243
Archie, we need more guys
like that station manager
330
00:12:15,267 --> 00:12:16,477
speaking out against guns.
331
00:12:16,501 --> 00:12:17,778
No, no, no!
332
00:12:17,802 --> 00:12:19,581
We got too many of
them station master guys
333
00:12:19,605 --> 00:12:21,716
paving the road to
communism in this here country.
334
00:12:21,740 --> 00:12:23,918
What we need to hear
more from is ordinary Joes.
335
00:12:23,942 --> 00:12:25,253
Oh, like you, I suppose?
336
00:12:25,277 --> 00:12:26,254
That's right.
337
00:12:26,278 --> 00:12:27,655
Fine. Good. We'll
give him a call.
338
00:12:27,679 --> 00:12:28,823
Get away.
339
00:12:28,847 --> 00:12:30,325
Come on. What's
the matter? Get lost.
340
00:12:30,349 --> 00:12:31,326
What? You got cold feet?
341
00:12:31,350 --> 00:12:32,527
I ain't got no cold feet.
342
00:12:32,551 --> 00:12:34,962
Oh, you do too, Archie, in bed.
343
00:12:34,986 --> 00:12:37,765
You always got cold feet.
344
00:12:37,789 --> 00:12:39,489
Edith...
345
00:12:40,626 --> 00:12:42,704
Don't torture me, huh?
346
00:12:42,728 --> 00:12:44,272
Mr. Bennett,
please. What is that?
347
00:12:44,296 --> 00:12:45,506
Come on. You scared?
348
00:12:45,530 --> 00:12:47,308
Get out of here. I
ain't scared of nothing.
349
00:12:47,332 --> 00:12:50,010
Well, then, come on, prove
it. Talk to the station manager.
350
00:12:50,034 --> 00:12:52,213
Yes, hello, I have a man
here who's interested in making
351
00:12:52,237 --> 00:12:54,215
a rebuttal to your
views on gun control.
352
00:12:54,239 --> 00:12:56,284
What kind of a gag is
that? Yes, thank you.
353
00:12:56,308 --> 00:12:58,018
That was his secretary.
She's putting him on.
354
00:12:58,042 --> 00:12:59,220
You ain't got nobody on there.
355
00:12:59,244 --> 00:13:00,221
Hello, Mr. Bennett?
356
00:13:00,245 --> 00:13:01,556
Yeah, yeah, he's right here.
357
00:13:01,580 --> 00:13:02,557
Get out of here.
358
00:13:02,581 --> 00:13:03,558
Come on. You scared?
359
00:13:03,582 --> 00:13:05,260
Give me that phone.
360
00:13:05,284 --> 00:13:07,662
Hello. Who is this?
361
00:13:07,686 --> 00:13:10,265
Huh?
362
00:13:10,289 --> 00:13:12,567
Yeah, well, no, no, no.
363
00:13:12,591 --> 00:13:13,968
See, I didn't make the call.
364
00:13:13,992 --> 00:13:15,770
It was my son-in-law here
monkeying around, and, uh...
365
00:13:15,794 --> 00:13:16,937
Oh, you're scared.
366
00:13:16,961 --> 00:13:18,673
Hold the line. What?
367
00:13:18,697 --> 00:13:19,774
You're scared.
368
00:13:19,798 --> 00:13:20,908
I'm scared, huh?
369
00:13:20,932 --> 00:13:22,543
Yeah, hello.
370
00:13:22,567 --> 00:13:25,446
Listen, this is
Archie Bunker here,
371
00:13:25,470 --> 00:13:27,582
and, uh, with regards
to your editorial
372
00:13:27,606 --> 00:13:28,983
on the gun control,
373
00:13:29,007 --> 00:13:30,873
I demand equal time.
374
00:13:38,750 --> 00:13:41,362
Look. Look, Mr. Martinez...
375
00:13:41,386 --> 00:13:45,700
Mr. Martinez, this station
is not anti-Puerto Rican.
376
00:13:45,724 --> 00:13:47,101
I would have
loved to have filmed
377
00:13:47,125 --> 00:13:48,235
your Puerto Rican festival,
378
00:13:48,259 --> 00:13:50,137
but I've only got
so many cameras.
379
00:13:50,161 --> 00:13:51,906
No, no, no, no, no.
380
00:13:51,930 --> 00:13:53,741
They're not all out
filming Cuban festivals
381
00:13:53,765 --> 00:13:56,544
and Black Panther festivals.
382
00:13:56,568 --> 00:13:59,413
Yes, I know you're a minority.
383
00:13:59,437 --> 00:14:02,550
In this community,
most people are.
384
00:14:02,574 --> 00:14:04,018
What am I?
385
00:14:04,042 --> 00:14:06,120
I'm an American.
386
00:14:06,144 --> 00:14:08,288
All right, Italian.
387
00:14:08,312 --> 00:14:11,425
What do you mean, "Ah-hah"?
388
00:14:11,449 --> 00:14:12,927
Mr. Martinez...
389
00:14:12,951 --> 00:14:13,928
Hello?
390
00:14:13,952 --> 00:14:15,530
Hello? Hel...
391
00:14:15,554 --> 00:14:17,331
Excuse me, Mr. Bennett,
392
00:14:17,355 --> 00:14:21,002
but while you were on the
phone, the gay people called again.
393
00:14:21,026 --> 00:14:23,793
Put them through to
Maurice. He understands.
394
00:14:26,932 --> 00:14:28,743
Oh, Mr. Bunker's still waiting.
395
00:14:28,767 --> 00:14:29,744
Bunker?
396
00:14:29,768 --> 00:14:31,111
The gun nut.
397
00:14:31,135 --> 00:14:32,680
Susan, don't talk like that.
398
00:14:32,704 --> 00:14:34,148
That man is part
of our audience.
399
00:14:34,172 --> 00:14:35,716
I'm sorry, sir.
400
00:14:35,740 --> 00:14:38,085
Show the gun nut in.
401
00:14:38,109 --> 00:14:39,954
You can come in now, Mr. Bunker.
402
00:14:39,978 --> 00:14:41,488
Yeah, all right.
403
00:14:41,512 --> 00:14:42,623
Hey...
404
00:14:42,647 --> 00:14:46,126
you're him, the
guy on the TV there.
405
00:14:46,150 --> 00:14:47,361
Come in, Mr. Bunker.
406
00:14:48,386 --> 00:14:49,564
Sorry to have kept you waiting.
407
00:14:49,588 --> 00:14:51,632
Would you like
some coffee, or...
408
00:14:51,656 --> 00:14:53,890
No, no, no, because I
just had my lunch here.
409
00:14:55,493 --> 00:14:56,470
That's an antique.
410
00:14:56,494 --> 00:14:58,061
No, that's brand-new.
411
00:15:00,465 --> 00:15:01,776
I mean, the desk.
412
00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:03,143
Oh, the desk, yeah.
413
00:15:03,167 --> 00:15:04,979
Well, I noticed when
I was coming in here,
414
00:15:05,003 --> 00:15:08,348
everything's a
little bit out of date,
415
00:15:08,372 --> 00:15:10,974
but, uh, I guess you're
pretty comfortable, huh?
416
00:15:13,544 --> 00:15:16,591
Well, now, Mr. Bunker,
we're always glad
417
00:15:16,615 --> 00:15:17,625
to fulfill our obligations
418
00:15:17,649 --> 00:15:20,728
to the public... and to the FCC.
419
00:15:20,752 --> 00:15:23,232
What group did you
say you represented?
420
00:15:23,655 --> 00:15:25,332
Uh, group? What do
you mean by group?
421
00:15:25,356 --> 00:15:27,001
Well, on whose behalf
422
00:15:27,025 --> 00:15:28,402
do you wish to
make this rebuttal?
423
00:15:28,426 --> 00:15:32,873
Uh, I wish to rebuttal
here on behalf of me.
424
00:15:32,897 --> 00:15:33,897
Just you?
425
00:15:36,067 --> 00:15:37,578
Yes?
426
00:15:37,602 --> 00:15:38,846
Who?
427
00:15:38,870 --> 00:15:41,115
Rabbi Goldman?
428
00:15:41,139 --> 00:15:42,717
All right, put him on.
429
00:15:42,741 --> 00:15:43,718
Excuse me.
430
00:15:43,742 --> 00:15:46,020
Yeah. Go ahead.
431
00:15:46,044 --> 00:15:48,244
Hello, Rabbi. What
can I do for you?
432
00:15:50,348 --> 00:15:53,794
Oh, but we had Rabbi
Levine on just last week.
433
00:15:53,818 --> 00:15:55,596
I thought he put the
Jewish point of view
434
00:15:55,620 --> 00:15:57,732
quite well.
435
00:15:57,756 --> 00:15:59,916
What do you mean,
"Rabbi Levine's not Jewish"?
436
00:16:02,426 --> 00:16:04,661
Oh, reformed doesn't count, huh?
437
00:16:07,231 --> 00:16:09,010
Well, look, why don't
you drop me a line
438
00:16:09,034 --> 00:16:11,078
and I'll see what I can do.
439
00:16:11,102 --> 00:16:12,813
Fine.
440
00:16:12,837 --> 00:16:14,414
Shalom to you too.
441
00:16:14,438 --> 00:16:16,216
Excuse me.
442
00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:17,584
Where were we?
443
00:16:17,608 --> 00:16:19,086
What group did you
say you represented?
444
00:16:19,110 --> 00:16:21,255
I just represent a
whole lot of guys
445
00:16:21,279 --> 00:16:22,523
just like me...
446
00:16:22,547 --> 00:16:25,014
I mean, down at work,
and in Kelsey's bar...
447
00:16:26,751 --> 00:16:29,096
and I just want to
get on the TV there
448
00:16:29,120 --> 00:16:30,197
and tell the public
449
00:16:30,221 --> 00:16:31,766
that all this stuff
about gun control
450
00:16:31,790 --> 00:16:35,269
is, uh, excuse me, garbage...
451
00:16:35,293 --> 00:16:37,571
because guns is what
made this here country
452
00:16:37,595 --> 00:16:39,206
what it is today.
453
00:16:39,230 --> 00:16:40,607
No argument.
454
00:16:40,631 --> 00:16:42,309
Guns is red, white
and blue American.
455
00:16:42,333 --> 00:16:43,577
Just like apple pie.
456
00:16:43,601 --> 00:16:45,079
That's right,
457
00:16:45,103 --> 00:16:47,614
and I believe in seeing
two sides of the question
458
00:16:47,638 --> 00:16:49,919
so that you can show the
other guy where he's wrong.
459
00:16:54,079 --> 00:16:55,455
You know, I never
thought of that.
460
00:16:55,479 --> 00:16:56,623
Yeah.
461
00:16:56,647 --> 00:16:58,826
Like, for instance, what
you said about guns, now.
462
00:16:58,850 --> 00:17:00,194
You see, that was wrong.
463
00:17:00,218 --> 00:17:02,830
You said that guns kill. Wrong.
464
00:17:02,854 --> 00:17:03,998
People kill. People kill.
465
00:17:04,022 --> 00:17:05,465
That's right.
466
00:17:05,489 --> 00:17:08,703
Okay, so how do you propose
to stop people killing people?
467
00:17:08,727 --> 00:17:11,393
That's easy. Bring
back the death penalty.
468
00:17:15,967 --> 00:17:16,944
Excuse me.
469
00:17:16,968 --> 00:17:18,334
Go ahead.
470
00:17:22,573 --> 00:17:23,784
Susan, will you have Johnson
471
00:17:23,808 --> 00:17:25,619
step in here for a minute?
472
00:17:25,643 --> 00:17:27,021
There's something
I want him to see
473
00:17:27,045 --> 00:17:28,878
before it's extinct.
474
00:17:39,824 --> 00:17:41,168
Ta-dah!
475
00:17:41,192 --> 00:17:43,070
I did it, Ma. I got the job!
476
00:17:43,094 --> 00:17:45,305
Oh, Gloria, that's wonderful!
477
00:17:45,329 --> 00:17:47,241
Mike, Gloria got the job.
478
00:17:47,265 --> 00:17:50,111
Really? Oh, congratulations,
honey. That's great.
479
00:17:50,135 --> 00:17:51,112
Michael, I was so nervous.
480
00:17:51,136 --> 00:17:52,713
You know, I had to cross my legs
481
00:17:52,737 --> 00:17:54,115
so I wouldn't hear
my knees knocking.
482
00:17:54,139 --> 00:17:58,385
Ain't that a coincidence?
Mine used to do that.
483
00:17:58,409 --> 00:18:00,020
I remember my interview
484
00:18:00,044 --> 00:18:02,589
with the Hercules
Plumbing Company.
485
00:18:02,613 --> 00:18:06,127
I had to wrap my feet
around the legs of my chair
486
00:18:06,151 --> 00:18:08,796
to keep my knees
from knocking together.
487
00:18:08,820 --> 00:18:10,631
Did it work?
488
00:18:10,655 --> 00:18:11,966
Oh, yeah,
489
00:18:11,990 --> 00:18:15,024
except I forgot about it
when I started to stand up.
490
00:18:18,429 --> 00:18:20,975
I fell right over
the boss's desk
491
00:18:20,999 --> 00:18:23,833
and broke his clock radio.
492
00:18:24,969 --> 00:18:26,546
Now hear this.
493
00:18:26,570 --> 00:18:28,082
After dinner, I'm
taking all of us
494
00:18:28,106 --> 00:18:30,251
down to Kelsey's bar
for a drink to celebrate.
495
00:18:30,275 --> 00:18:31,551
Oh, great. Oh, good.
496
00:18:31,575 --> 00:18:32,887
Whoop-dee-doo!
497
00:18:32,911 --> 00:18:36,456
Ah-hah! You think I
couldn't do it, but I done it.
498
00:18:36,480 --> 00:18:38,058
Wait till you see.
You did it, Daddy?
499
00:18:38,082 --> 00:18:40,094
Archie, that's wonderful!
500
00:18:40,118 --> 00:18:41,862
Congratulations.
501
00:18:41,886 --> 00:18:45,266
Oh, I'm so proud of you.
502
00:18:45,290 --> 00:18:46,290
What did you do?
503
00:18:49,560 --> 00:18:51,672
I rebuttaled that guy
on TV about the guns.
504
00:18:51,696 --> 00:18:53,274
You really went
down to that station?
505
00:18:53,298 --> 00:18:54,474
Yeah. Daddy, you
were on television?
506
00:18:54,498 --> 00:18:56,476
Archie, you were on television,
507
00:18:56,500 --> 00:18:57,978
and we missed it?
508
00:18:58,002 --> 00:19:00,214
Why didn't you
call us and tell us?
509
00:19:00,238 --> 00:19:01,982
Because I knew I
was coming right home,
510
00:19:02,006 --> 00:19:03,383
and I'm going to be on there
511
00:19:03,407 --> 00:19:04,718
in about two minutes.
512
00:19:04,742 --> 00:19:06,120
Oh, wow. He's going to be on.
513
00:19:06,144 --> 00:19:08,122
This I got to see.
This I got to see.
514
00:19:08,146 --> 00:19:09,123
Oh, Edith, they couldn't wait
515
00:19:09,147 --> 00:19:10,124
to get me on there.
516
00:19:10,148 --> 00:19:11,425
They brought me into a studio,
517
00:19:11,449 --> 00:19:14,028
sat me down on a stool,
told me to do it right there,
518
00:19:14,052 --> 00:19:15,595
and I done it there, on tape.
519
00:19:15,619 --> 00:19:17,832
Really, Daddy?
In your own words?
520
00:19:17,856 --> 00:19:19,733
Certainly, my own
words, little girl.
521
00:19:19,757 --> 00:19:21,135
What else do you
think they wanted?
522
00:19:21,159 --> 00:19:23,737
"Just say it into the camera
the way you said it to us."
523
00:19:23,761 --> 00:19:25,472
Here, not yet.
524
00:19:25,496 --> 00:19:27,174
Oh, boy, Edith,
525
00:19:27,198 --> 00:19:28,742
you should've seen that camera.
526
00:19:28,766 --> 00:19:30,945
Oh, with the wheels,
everything, the lights...
527
00:19:30,969 --> 00:19:32,512
Did they make you
up, Daddy? Sure.
528
00:19:32,536 --> 00:19:35,515
Oh, no, Gloria, they
wouldn't have to do that.
529
00:19:35,539 --> 00:19:37,106
Archie is real.
530
00:19:40,278 --> 00:19:44,458
No. Ma, I mean makeup
to cover his 5:00 shadow.
531
00:19:44,482 --> 00:19:47,494
Aw, nah. They just puffed
a little powder all over.
532
00:19:47,518 --> 00:19:49,398
Yeah, a little
Helena Rubinstein.
533
00:19:50,221 --> 00:19:53,133
Shut up.
534
00:19:53,157 --> 00:19:55,669
And I blew it right off
after it was all over anyway.
535
00:19:55,693 --> 00:19:57,504
And you really said
that guns were okay?
536
00:19:57,528 --> 00:19:58,505
I certainly did,
537
00:19:58,529 --> 00:19:59,606
and you know something
538
00:19:59,630 --> 00:20:01,108
about that station
master down there?
539
00:20:01,132 --> 00:20:03,110
The guy never fired
off a gun in his life.
540
00:20:03,134 --> 00:20:04,111
He admitted that to me.
541
00:20:04,135 --> 00:20:05,112
So?
542
00:20:05,136 --> 00:20:06,446
So?
543
00:20:06,470 --> 00:20:08,648
Some crackpot who never
fired off a gun in his life,
544
00:20:08,672 --> 00:20:11,418
he wants to take the fun
away from all the other guys.
545
00:20:11,442 --> 00:20:13,453
Yeah, that's right, Arch.
He's a regular killjoy.
546
00:20:13,477 --> 00:20:14,821
Yeah, and talking about killing,
547
00:20:14,845 --> 00:20:16,357
cars kill more
people in this country
548
00:20:16,381 --> 00:20:17,358
than guns every year.
549
00:20:17,382 --> 00:20:18,392
Did you know that?
550
00:20:18,416 --> 00:20:20,194
And I told him
that on the TV too.
551
00:20:20,218 --> 00:20:21,195
Archie, that's stupid.
552
00:20:21,219 --> 00:20:22,529
Drivers don't
mean to kill people.
553
00:20:22,553 --> 00:20:25,554
Oh, no? You ain't
driven a cab yet, bud.
554
00:20:27,458 --> 00:20:28,635
Here we are, here we are.
555
00:20:28,659 --> 00:20:29,836
All right, everybody,
clam up now.
556
00:20:29,860 --> 00:20:31,438
Oh, look what
they did to your hair.
557
00:20:31,462 --> 00:20:32,940
Mr. Archie Bunker,
558
00:20:32,964 --> 00:20:34,341
speaking in reply to
the editorial broadcast
559
00:20:34,365 --> 00:20:35,342
last Saturday.
560
00:20:35,366 --> 00:20:37,344
Good evening, everybody.
561
00:20:37,368 --> 00:20:40,981
This here is Archie Bunker
of 704 Hauser Street,
562
00:20:41,005 --> 00:20:42,449
veteran of the big war,
563
00:20:42,473 --> 00:20:45,986
speaking on behalf
of guns for everybody.
564
00:20:46,010 --> 00:20:47,388
Now question:
565
00:20:47,412 --> 00:20:50,057
what was the first thing
that the communists done
566
00:20:50,081 --> 00:20:52,259
when they took over Russia?
567
00:20:52,283 --> 00:20:53,961
Answer: gun control.
568
00:20:53,985 --> 00:20:55,762
And there's a lot of
people in this country
569
00:20:55,786 --> 00:20:57,864
want to do the
same thing to us here
570
00:20:57,888 --> 00:20:59,967
in a kind of conspiracy, see?
571
00:20:59,991 --> 00:21:02,502
You take your big
international bankers...
572
00:21:02,526 --> 00:21:05,105
uh, they want to...
What do you call...
573
00:21:05,129 --> 00:21:07,141
Masticate the people
of this here nation
574
00:21:07,165 --> 00:21:08,508
like puppets on a wing.
575
00:21:08,532 --> 00:21:10,444
And then, when
they get that done,
576
00:21:10,468 --> 00:21:12,179
turn us over to the commies.
577
00:21:12,203 --> 00:21:14,481
Oh, Archie, I'm glad
they put you on a stool.
578
00:21:14,505 --> 00:21:16,050
Shh, shh, shh.
579
00:21:16,074 --> 00:21:17,584
You look taller sitting down.
580
00:21:17,608 --> 00:21:19,053
Shush!
581
00:21:19,077 --> 00:21:20,620
Now I want to talk about
582
00:21:20,644 --> 00:21:22,689
another thing that's on
everybody's mind today,
583
00:21:22,713 --> 00:21:25,259
and that's yous stickups
and yous skyjackers,
584
00:21:25,283 --> 00:21:27,594
which, uh, if that was up to me,
585
00:21:27,618 --> 00:21:29,363
I could end the
skyjackings tomorrow.
586
00:21:29,387 --> 00:21:31,731
You could?
587
00:21:31,755 --> 00:21:34,601
All you got to do is
arm all your passengers.
588
00:21:34,625 --> 00:21:37,571
If he knows the
passengers are armed
589
00:21:37,595 --> 00:21:39,940
and that he ain't got no
more superior-ority there,
590
00:21:39,964 --> 00:21:42,142
then he ain't gonna
dare to pull out no rod,
591
00:21:42,166 --> 00:21:43,510
and then you realize
592
00:21:43,534 --> 00:21:44,811
that they wouldn't have
593
00:21:44,835 --> 00:21:48,215
to search the passengers
on the ground no more.
594
00:21:48,239 --> 00:21:50,617
They just pass out the pistols
at the beginning of the trip,
595
00:21:50,641 --> 00:21:53,687
and they pick them
up again at the end.
596
00:21:53,711 --> 00:21:56,178
Case closed.
597
00:22:01,619 --> 00:22:04,264
That's incredible, Arch.
598
00:22:04,288 --> 00:22:06,300
What do you mean, "incredible"?
599
00:22:06,324 --> 00:22:08,435
What I said made
damn good sense to me,
600
00:22:08,459 --> 00:22:09,436
even when I heard it
601
00:22:09,460 --> 00:22:11,505
played back on the television.
602
00:22:11,529 --> 00:22:12,706
I hated every word you said,
603
00:22:12,730 --> 00:22:14,408
but you sure came
through loud and clear.
604
00:22:14,432 --> 00:22:17,111
Well, experience
tells, Meathead.
605
00:22:17,135 --> 00:22:19,146
You don't command
men on a loading platform
606
00:22:19,170 --> 00:22:20,702
without learning something.
607
00:22:22,407 --> 00:22:24,718
Wow, this has really
been quite a day, Daddy.
608
00:22:24,742 --> 00:22:26,520
You were on television
and I got a job.
609
00:22:26,544 --> 00:22:27,721
Yeah.
610
00:22:27,745 --> 00:22:30,657
It's him. You're him.
611
00:22:30,681 --> 00:22:34,528
The guy I just saw on
television down the street.
612
00:22:34,552 --> 00:22:35,695
Mr. Bunker.
613
00:22:35,719 --> 00:22:37,464
That's right. You seen the show?
614
00:22:37,488 --> 00:22:39,400
Yeah. I want to shake your hand.
615
00:22:39,424 --> 00:22:40,767
Hey, gee, pleased to meet you.
616
00:22:40,791 --> 00:22:43,137
Hey, listen to this...
the public here.
617
00:22:43,161 --> 00:22:45,105
Man, I really dug what you said
618
00:22:45,129 --> 00:22:46,473
about those guns.
619
00:22:46,497 --> 00:22:48,575
I mean, I couldn't have
said it better myself.
620
00:22:48,599 --> 00:22:50,377
Oh, I bet you're real
proud of him, huh?
621
00:22:51,902 --> 00:22:53,280
Well, you know, I'm just trying
622
00:22:53,304 --> 00:22:55,082
to set the public straight
on something, that's all.
623
00:22:55,106 --> 00:22:56,417
Like when you said,
624
00:22:56,441 --> 00:22:59,853
"Guns are what brings
law and order to our cities."
625
00:22:59,877 --> 00:23:02,856
Yeah, and what shoot a
hundred policemen a year.
626
00:23:02,880 --> 00:23:04,513
Who's this?
627
00:23:06,484 --> 00:23:09,163
He's only my son-in-law.
Don't pay no attention to him.
628
00:23:09,187 --> 00:23:10,497
He's a meatheaded student,
629
00:23:10,521 --> 00:23:12,966
and he don't know
nothing about the real world.
630
00:23:12,990 --> 00:23:16,070
Listen, you ought
to listen to him.
631
00:23:16,094 --> 00:23:17,637
Like when he said, quote:
632
00:23:17,661 --> 00:23:19,873
"Guns are just
like free speech."
633
00:23:19,897 --> 00:23:21,341
Beautiful.
634
00:23:21,365 --> 00:23:22,909
Well, the truth is beautiful.
635
00:23:22,933 --> 00:23:24,978
Beautiful. You
said it all, fella.
636
00:23:25,002 --> 00:23:27,781
Why don't you
have a beer with us?
637
00:23:27,805 --> 00:23:30,517
Oh, no. Actually, I
got to get to work now.
638
00:23:30,541 --> 00:23:32,986
Uh, Louis?
639
00:23:33,010 --> 00:23:34,188
Put your money in the hat.
640
00:23:34,212 --> 00:23:36,123
Huh?
641
00:23:36,147 --> 00:23:39,693
Wallet! Wallet!
642
00:23:39,717 --> 00:23:41,761
The wallets? All
right, don't shoot, now.
643
00:23:41,785 --> 00:23:43,330
Here, here, here.
644
00:23:43,354 --> 00:23:44,764
Give me your wristwatch.
645
00:23:44,788 --> 00:23:45,932
Oh, Archie.
646
00:23:45,956 --> 00:23:48,056
Give it to him,
Edith. He'll kill me.
647
00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:51,138
That's it now, folks.
648
00:23:51,162 --> 00:23:52,506
Louis?
649
00:23:52,530 --> 00:23:53,707
Oh, by the way,
650
00:23:53,731 --> 00:23:55,309
Mr. Bunker, did you
pay for those drinks?
651
00:23:55,333 --> 00:23:56,310
No.
652
00:23:56,334 --> 00:23:57,344
Bartender?
653
00:23:57,368 --> 00:23:59,413
The drinks are on me.
654
00:23:59,437 --> 00:24:01,148
Bye-bye, everybody.
655
00:24:01,172 --> 00:24:02,172
Bye-bye.
656
00:24:18,656 --> 00:24:19,633
Leave me alone.
657
00:24:19,657 --> 00:24:21,701
Get away from me! What? What?
658
00:24:21,725 --> 00:24:23,504
Just get away from
me, Meathead, that's all!
659
00:24:23,528 --> 00:24:25,572
Took my wallet, all my dough...
my paycheck, everything gone.
660
00:24:25,596 --> 00:24:26,573
Well, that proves my point...
661
00:24:26,597 --> 00:24:27,774
If he didn't have a gun
662
00:24:27,798 --> 00:24:28,775
he wouldn't have robbed us.
663
00:24:28,799 --> 00:24:30,177
Well, if I had had a gun,
664
00:24:30,201 --> 00:24:31,612
he wouldn't have
robbed us neither.
665
00:24:31,636 --> 00:24:32,946
When I reached for my wallet,
666
00:24:32,970 --> 00:24:36,216
I'd pull out a pistol,
and I'd give it to him.
667
00:24:36,240 --> 00:24:38,018
Well, he'd have given
it to you too, Archie.
668
00:24:38,042 --> 00:24:39,119
Aw!
669
00:24:39,143 --> 00:24:40,754
Yeah, and then
you'd both be dead.
670
00:24:40,778 --> 00:24:42,022
I don't care!
671
00:24:42,046 --> 00:24:44,913
At least I'd have more
money than I got now!
672
00:25:03,967 --> 00:25:05,345
All in the Family was recorded
673
00:25:05,369 --> 00:25:08,036
on tape before a live audience.
48015
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