All language subtitles for What.Men_.Want_.2019.HDCAM_.x264.AC3_.MP4KiNG-HI(1)
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1
00:00:20,994 --> 00:00:25,994
Subtitles by explosiveskull
2
00:00:25,996 --> 00:00:28,263
[footsteps pounding]
[panting]
3
00:00:34,063 --> 00:00:37,298
[upbeat hip-hop music playing]
4
00:00:38,398 --> 00:00:39,994
[phone speed dialing,
line ringing]
5
00:00:39,996 --> 00:00:43,729
Hello? Hello, Glenn.
It's Ali Davis.
6
00:00:43,731 --> 00:00:46,796
Yes, baby! I'm excited, too.
But wait, what?
7
00:00:46,798 --> 00:00:49,296
Yes, I know Sports Illustrated
wants Serena for June,
8
00:00:49,298 --> 00:00:52,664
but before we talk about that client,
we need to talk about Lisa Leslie,
9
00:00:52,666 --> 00:00:55,597
who will be front and center
at the shoot.
10
00:00:55,599 --> 00:00:58,129
What? Oh, oh, no.
No, this ain't a negotiation.
11
00:00:58,131 --> 00:01:01,096
It's center position or tall-ass
girl ain't showing up for the shoot!
12
00:01:01,098 --> 00:01:02,696
[woman on TV]
Big news in basketball.
13
00:01:02,698 --> 00:01:05,063
College sensation Jamal Barry
declared himself eligible
14
00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:06,730
for the NBA draft.
What? Excuse me,
15
00:01:06,732 --> 00:01:08,297
I am her agent.
He has not yet signed with an agent.
16
00:01:08,299 --> 00:01:10,330
Oh, no, no.
Glenn, don't go there with me.
17
00:01:10,332 --> 00:01:12,697
What'd you say? Oh, no, no.
No, no, no.
18
00:01:12,699 --> 00:01:14,063
Oh, you. No. No, no, no, no.
19
00:01:14,065 --> 00:01:16,263
No, no, no.
Glenn, no, you listen!
20
00:01:16,265 --> 00:01:19,498
Unless Lisa is guaranteed
center position in writing,
21
00:01:19,500 --> 00:01:21,130
you'd better learn
how to Photoshop
22
00:01:21,132 --> 00:01:23,063
because you ain't gonna have
any of my clients
23
00:01:23,065 --> 00:01:25,697
in your magazine ever again!
24
00:01:25,699 --> 00:01:27,431
You know what? Goodbye.
25
00:01:27,433 --> 00:01:30,164
I'm not dealing
with stupid people today.
26
00:01:30,166 --> 00:01:31,565
- Good morning?
- Good morning.
27
00:01:31,567 --> 00:01:33,331
[phone ringing]
Oh, he's calling back!
28
00:01:33,333 --> 00:01:35,565
You know what? Can you deal
with the slow people today?
29
00:01:35,567 --> 00:01:36,666
I can't.
30
00:01:36,899 --> 00:01:39,400
Hey, Glenn,
let me see if I can get her.
31
00:01:40,767 --> 00:01:42,264
- You know what? She just stepped out.
- [tablet chimes]
32
00:01:42,266 --> 00:01:44,798
I'll have her return.
Buh-bye.
33
00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:46,566
How long have you been up?
34
00:01:46,568 --> 00:01:50,599
Ooh, since 3:00 a.m.,
and I've been crushing it all morning,
35
00:01:50,601 --> 00:01:53,299
- talking to Nike and Puma.
- [tablet chimes]
36
00:01:53,301 --> 00:01:56,265
But I've decided I'm going
to take Candace to Adidas,
37
00:01:56,267 --> 00:01:57,798
because they stepped up.
[chiming continues]
38
00:01:57,800 --> 00:01:59,998
- You're dinging.
- Oh, no, stop it.
39
00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:02,432
- Please stop. Here, stop it!
- [chimes]
40
00:02:02,434 --> 00:02:03,766
Go away!
41
00:02:03,768 --> 00:02:08,032
Mari created this
Lovefinders.com profile for me.
42
00:02:08,034 --> 00:02:09,367
Can you please get rid of it?
43
00:02:09,369 --> 00:02:11,165
All these stupid alerts
keep coming up.
44
00:02:11,167 --> 00:02:13,032
I will have it taken down ASAP.
Mm-hmm.
45
00:02:13,034 --> 00:02:14,998
If that's definitely
what you want?
46
00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:16,333
That is definitely what I want.
47
00:02:16,335 --> 00:02:18,100
Okay. It's just...
It's been a minute.
48
00:02:18,102 --> 00:02:19,535
Uh, how would you know?
49
00:02:19,768 --> 00:02:21,999
Well, I keep your calendar.
Booty calls aren't in there.
50
00:02:22,001 --> 00:02:23,632
Just please do
what I ask you to do.
51
00:02:23,634 --> 00:02:25,266
Thank you. Ooh, I got to go.
52
00:02:25,268 --> 00:02:27,066
Dry cleaning is here,
and I really feel like
53
00:02:27,068 --> 00:02:29,166
the black skirt,
houndstooth jacket screams,
54
00:02:29,168 --> 00:02:32,066
"Damn right you're making me partner!
Took you bitches long enough."
55
00:02:32,068 --> 00:02:34,700
You know what, Brandon?
Just because you're gay,
56
00:02:34,702 --> 00:02:38,033
doesn't mean you're fabulous,
okurrr? [chuckles]
57
00:02:38,035 --> 00:02:41,201
[weakly] Okurr.
It's "okurrr."
58
00:02:41,203 --> 00:02:43,267
I... I can't even...
59
00:02:43,269 --> 00:02:46,067
Come on, honey, walk like you
are an assistant to a partner.
60
00:02:46,069 --> 00:02:49,203
- Mm-hmm.
- Let's go. [clears throat]
61
00:02:51,069 --> 00:02:54,436
Holy Mother of Men's Health and
Fitness, what is happening here?
62
00:02:55,002 --> 00:02:57,234
Oh, that's my new neighbor.
63
00:02:57,236 --> 00:03:01,134
Captain Fucktastic, that's what
I've been calling him. Right?
64
00:03:01,136 --> 00:03:02,167
Yeah.
[elevator bell dings]
65
00:03:02,169 --> 00:03:03,568
[Brandon stammers]
66
00:03:03,570 --> 00:03:05,902
- Hi.
- Hi. Hi.
67
00:03:09,304 --> 00:03:12,537
["Mambo No. 5"
playing on headphones]
68
00:03:21,838 --> 00:03:23,669
[Ali] Such a nice day for a jog.
69
00:03:23,671 --> 00:03:27,472
I like running.
I just don't like running alone.
70
00:03:28,903 --> 00:03:30,037
[mouthing] He's gay.
71
00:03:31,372 --> 00:03:33,938
Anyone seen the new Gaga video?
72
00:03:35,438 --> 00:03:37,571
[whispers] No, he's not.
[bell dings]
73
00:03:42,772 --> 00:03:44,069
God.
74
00:03:44,071 --> 00:03:46,703
Not even a sideways eye fuck.
Nada.
75
00:03:46,705 --> 00:03:48,103
What's going on in his head?
76
00:03:48,105 --> 00:03:49,936
What, my ass doesn't look good
in this skirt?
77
00:03:49,938 --> 00:03:51,636
Oh, given
the current climate,
78
00:03:51,638 --> 00:03:53,270
it feels inappropriate
for me to comment on your body.
79
00:03:53,272 --> 00:03:54,770
- Brandon!
- Tight as a snare drum.
80
00:03:54,772 --> 00:03:56,003
You could bounce a quarter
off that thing.
81
00:03:56,005 --> 00:03:57,603
You know what? Screw him.
82
00:03:57,605 --> 00:03:59,237
- Today's my day. I'm making partner, baby.
- Mm-hmm!
83
00:03:59,239 --> 00:04:01,870
And no man,
I don't care how fucktastic,
84
00:04:01,872 --> 00:04:03,738
is gonna kill my vibe.
85
00:04:03,740 --> 00:04:05,972
["Poison" playing]
86
00:04:08,206 --> 00:04:09,804
[phone chimes]
[Brandon] It's Mari,
87
00:04:09,806 --> 00:04:11,804
she says she wants you
to bring champagne
88
00:04:11,806 --> 00:04:13,338
to the bachelorette party
'cause Olivia's always sucks.
89
00:04:13,340 --> 00:04:15,872
[Ali]
Okay, Bridezilla, take a Xanax.
90
00:04:16,806 --> 00:04:18,338
[sighs]
91
00:04:18,340 --> 00:04:22,171
So, seeing as how today's
the big day and all,
92
00:04:22,173 --> 00:04:24,604
I was wondering if,
once you get bumped up to partner,
93
00:04:24,606 --> 00:04:28,140
you might...
see any changes in store for me?
94
00:04:29,240 --> 00:04:31,705
Look,
you make a great assistant,
95
00:04:31,707 --> 00:04:34,038
but you'd be a shitty agent.
96
00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:35,607
And I say that
with love.
97
00:04:36,640 --> 00:04:38,540
I know, right? Totally.
98
00:04:39,574 --> 00:04:43,505
Luckily, I'm blissfully happy
just being your assistant...
99
00:04:43,507 --> 00:04:44,572
Good.
100
00:04:44,574 --> 00:04:45,707
...in perpetuity.
101
00:04:46,208 --> 00:04:48,441
[music continues]
102
00:04:59,074 --> 00:05:00,773
[man] Ooh, hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo.
103
00:05:00,775 --> 00:05:02,606
Check out
the sweet new wheels.
104
00:05:02,608 --> 00:05:04,673
A pre-celebration
for the big day, huh?
105
00:05:04,675 --> 00:05:08,740
No, Ethan. Just...
another day at the office.
106
00:05:08,742 --> 00:05:11,340
[Brandon] Rolling calls, crushing balls.
[valet] Good morning, Ms. Davis.
107
00:05:11,342 --> 00:05:13,374
Ah, ladies first. Thank you.
108
00:05:13,376 --> 00:05:15,207
I mean, this should've
happened years ago.
109
00:05:15,209 --> 00:05:16,774
It's crazy that I'm a
partner and you're not
110
00:05:16,776 --> 00:05:19,040
just 'cause I signed Matt Ryan.
I mean, come on!
111
00:05:19,042 --> 00:05:21,906
I mean, in fairness to me,
monster signing, but still...
112
00:05:21,908 --> 00:05:24,240
Yeah, you're right, Ethan.
It is crazy.
113
00:05:24,242 --> 00:05:25,707
That's what I said.
114
00:05:25,709 --> 00:05:27,440
[cell phone ringing]
Well, I'm rooting for you.
115
00:05:27,442 --> 00:05:29,407
- Fingers crossed, right?
- Thanks, Ethan.
116
00:05:29,409 --> 00:05:31,241
[ringing continues]
I can't.
117
00:05:31,243 --> 00:05:33,776
Ali Davis's office. Hi, Mari.
118
00:05:34,409 --> 00:05:36,007
Mari says she knows you're here.
119
00:05:36,009 --> 00:05:37,640
She has a quick
bachelorette party question.
120
00:05:37,642 --> 00:05:39,341
[Ali] Tell her I'm all good
for tomorrow night.
121
00:05:39,343 --> 00:05:41,375
Text me any specifics.
But be supportive, you know.
122
00:05:41,377 --> 00:05:43,943
Make it sound like I wish
I had time to shoot the shit.
123
00:05:45,976 --> 00:05:50,174
Hey, girl. Ali can't wait to get it.
It's gonna be a partay.
124
00:05:50,176 --> 00:05:53,342
Hey, hey, pop quiz!
What is being kicked today?
125
00:05:53,344 --> 00:05:55,041
A world of ass!
Boom!
126
00:05:55,043 --> 00:05:56,974
[Brandon] Sorry.
[man] Staff meeting in five.
127
00:05:56,976 --> 00:05:59,342
I swear to God, bro,
don't fuck with me!
128
00:05:59,344 --> 00:06:02,575
Fuck you, bro! I'll rip out
your eyes and fuck the sockets!
129
00:06:02,577 --> 00:06:04,111
I'll fuck your mom!
130
00:06:04,977 --> 00:06:06,109
Ad agency exec?
131
00:06:06,111 --> 00:06:07,344
Oh, no, it's my brother.
132
00:06:07,678 --> 00:06:10,908
Yeah, we're doing that whole
fantasy football prep.
133
00:06:10,910 --> 00:06:12,277
Anyway, want a doughnut?
134
00:06:13,411 --> 00:06:14,609
Sure. Thanks.
135
00:06:14,611 --> 00:06:16,942
Hey. It's always good
to see you guys.
136
00:06:16,944 --> 00:06:18,042
It always brightens my day.
137
00:06:18,044 --> 00:06:19,642
Oh, thanks, Danny.
138
00:06:19,644 --> 00:06:22,776
You said you were gonna
fuck your brother's ma?
139
00:06:22,778 --> 00:06:25,409
Our mom, yeah.
Uh-huh. Okay.
140
00:06:25,411 --> 00:06:27,210
So, we're laying in bed
and she says,
141
00:06:27,212 --> 00:06:29,112
"Do you even know my name?"
142
00:06:30,145 --> 00:06:33,043
No clue, right? None.
I have no clue.
143
00:06:33,045 --> 00:06:35,610
So, I pretend to be
all appalled by this.
144
00:06:35,612 --> 00:06:37,844
I run off to the bathroom,
I sneak to the kitchen,
145
00:06:37,846 --> 00:06:39,210
I start looking
through her mail,
146
00:06:39,212 --> 00:06:41,076
I find
a Bed Bath & Beyond coupon.
147
00:06:41,078 --> 00:06:43,076
I'm buck naked, mind you.
She comes in, I go,
148
00:06:43,078 --> 00:06:45,343
"Oh, good morning,
uh, Resident."
149
00:06:45,345 --> 00:06:48,010
[laughter]
150
00:06:48,012 --> 00:06:49,844
And knowing you, Kevin,
you kept the coupon.
151
00:06:49,846 --> 00:06:51,177
You know I did.
152
00:06:51,179 --> 00:06:52,811
Story gets better,
I'll finish it later.
153
00:06:52,813 --> 00:06:55,311
Oh, come on, Ali can handle
locker-room talk. Right, bro?
154
00:06:55,313 --> 00:06:58,678
Yeah, I'm sure you'll get the
X-rated version at poker night.
155
00:06:58,680 --> 00:07:00,778
Why do you keep on this?
There's no poker night.
156
00:07:00,780 --> 00:07:02,578
If there was a poker night,
we would invite you
157
00:07:02,580 --> 00:07:04,077
'cause I'd like
to take your money.
158
00:07:04,079 --> 00:07:05,877
Really?
[laughs] No poker night.
159
00:07:05,879 --> 00:07:07,344
None, nada, zip!
160
00:07:07,346 --> 00:07:10,278
Ooh, I'ma need you to calm down,
baby man child.
161
00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:11,745
Mm.
[light laughter]
162
00:07:11,747 --> 00:07:13,011
Looking like Bamm-Bamm.
163
00:07:13,013 --> 00:07:16,145
Boom! Seize the day, right?
164
00:07:16,147 --> 00:07:17,644
That's why we're here.
165
00:07:17,646 --> 00:07:20,478
We seize the day here at Summit!
That's right!
166
00:07:20,480 --> 00:07:21,814
[hooting]
167
00:07:22,346 --> 00:07:25,178
That's right! Good to see you!
How you doing?
168
00:07:25,180 --> 00:07:27,047
You keep telling yourself that.
169
00:07:27,848 --> 00:07:29,614
All right. Gentlemen...
170
00:07:30,814 --> 00:07:32,512
Headline news:
171
00:07:32,514 --> 00:07:35,246
Jamal Barry will be the
number-one pick in the NBA draft,
172
00:07:35,248 --> 00:07:36,748
and he's meeting
with agents.
173
00:07:37,181 --> 00:07:39,046
Now, I love Jamal.
174
00:07:39,048 --> 00:07:41,312
Not only because
he's a big-time player,
175
00:07:41,314 --> 00:07:43,612
but he's a franchise maker.
176
00:07:43,614 --> 00:07:45,481
But Jamal does come
with some baggage.
177
00:07:45,981 --> 00:07:47,613
Dear old dad.
178
00:07:47,615 --> 00:07:49,747
[chuckles] Guy legally
changed his name to Joe Dolla,
179
00:07:49,749 --> 00:07:52,513
which he's also calling his line
of nutritional supplements.
180
00:07:52,515 --> 00:07:54,513
[laughter] [man] So,
now you know what we're up against.
181
00:07:54,515 --> 00:07:56,680
So, here's what we need.
We need to let him know
182
00:07:56,682 --> 00:07:59,513
that he'll have
the entire team around him.
183
00:07:59,515 --> 00:08:02,546
Because our teamwork
makes their dream work!
184
00:08:02,548 --> 00:08:05,047
- [Ethan] Whoo!
- That's right! All right!
185
00:08:05,049 --> 00:08:08,279
Now, speaking...
speaking of teamwork,
186
00:08:08,281 --> 00:08:10,482
I think we got ourselves...
187
00:08:11,482 --> 00:08:13,614
- a championship ball.
- [men hooting, clamoring]
188
00:08:13,616 --> 00:08:14,880
Right?
189
00:08:14,882 --> 00:08:16,614
And I think you know
what this means.
190
00:08:16,616 --> 00:08:20,481
That means somebody in this room
is about to be knighted.
191
00:08:20,483 --> 00:08:23,748
Now, that could be you.
Uh-huh. [laughs]
192
00:08:23,750 --> 00:08:24,880
It could be you.
193
00:08:24,882 --> 00:08:26,247
You had a good year.
194
00:08:26,249 --> 00:08:28,383
But anyway,
before I name names...
195
00:08:29,249 --> 00:08:31,316
I got to say something
about this person.
196
00:08:32,950 --> 00:08:34,249
This person...
197
00:08:35,183 --> 00:08:39,883
is tough as nails,
plays with passion and grit.
198
00:08:40,751 --> 00:08:41,784
This person...
199
00:08:42,650 --> 00:08:45,215
has brass balls
when it comes to negotiations.
200
00:08:45,217 --> 00:08:47,715
[light chatter]
201
00:08:47,717 --> 00:08:51,049
Now, it's my honor
to confer title of partner
202
00:08:51,051 --> 00:08:56,648
to the person synonymous with
Summit Worldwide Management.
203
00:08:56,650 --> 00:09:00,450
Let's give it up for the newest
member of the partners club!
204
00:09:01,151 --> 00:09:02,549
Here you go! Eddie Allen!
205
00:09:02,551 --> 00:09:04,516
[laughs, squeals]
206
00:09:04,518 --> 00:09:06,982
- Ali?
- [Ali laughs] Whoo!
207
00:09:06,984 --> 00:09:08,716
[stammers]
208
00:09:08,718 --> 00:09:11,583
That's a great interception,
Ali, but that pass was to Eddie.
209
00:09:11,585 --> 00:09:13,983
Yeah, he said "Eddie."
Eddie, that's right.
210
00:09:13,985 --> 00:09:16,716
Pass that ball to Eddie. Eddie!
Eddie Allen, our new partner!
211
00:09:16,718 --> 00:09:18,683
[cheers, applause] Way to go, Eddie!
Good job.
212
00:09:18,685 --> 00:09:19,616
Great year!
Yeah!
213
00:09:19,618 --> 00:09:20,784
[somber music]
214
00:09:20,786 --> 00:09:22,016
[man] Eddie Allen, boys!
Whoo!
215
00:09:22,018 --> 00:09:23,483
That's our new partner!
All right!
216
00:09:23,485 --> 00:09:25,950
Hand him the ball.
That's right. Give it up.
217
00:09:25,952 --> 00:09:28,517
You want to hand the ball
to Eddie.
218
00:09:28,519 --> 00:09:30,950
That's right. Hand the ball over.
That's right, there you are.
219
00:09:30,952 --> 00:09:33,851
- Eddie Allen! Congratulations to Eddie!
- [Eddie] Yeah! Whoo!
220
00:09:33,853 --> 00:09:36,185
That's teamwork right there!
Teamwork!
221
00:09:50,986 --> 00:09:53,418
Is this a joke, Nick? Huh?
222
00:09:53,420 --> 00:09:55,884
I mean, what the fuck do I
have to do to make partner?
223
00:09:55,886 --> 00:09:57,351
Breathe. Grab a Fiji.
224
00:09:57,353 --> 00:09:58,884
I mean, you know the deal.
225
00:09:58,886 --> 00:10:00,551
It has to be
unanimous partner approval.
226
00:10:00,553 --> 00:10:03,218
Okay. So who was it?
It was Kevin, wasn't it?
227
00:10:03,220 --> 00:10:04,685
I knew it was Kevin.
228
00:10:04,687 --> 00:10:07,018
It's anonymous,
so I honestly couldn't tell you.
229
00:10:07,020 --> 00:10:10,952
This is bullshit. This is boys-club
bullshit, and you know it!
230
00:10:10,954 --> 00:10:13,318
Look, this is a meritocracy.
231
00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:15,619
So, you're not entitled
to be a partner.
232
00:10:15,621 --> 00:10:17,753
I'm sorry, "entitled"?
233
00:10:17,755 --> 00:10:21,786
Oh, well, you name someone who reps
more Olympic gold medalists than me.
234
00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:25,086
I have clients on the cover
of Sports Illustrated and Vogue
235
00:10:25,088 --> 00:10:26,652
in the same month!
236
00:10:26,654 --> 00:10:28,686
But you don't have any of
the big three clients, do you?
237
00:10:28,688 --> 00:10:31,319
The MLB, the NBA, the NFL.
238
00:10:31,321 --> 00:10:33,886
I mean,
Eddie signed Mitchell Trubisky.
239
00:10:33,888 --> 00:10:35,754
That's a number-one draft pick.
240
00:10:35,756 --> 00:10:37,886
Boom. Done.
241
00:10:37,888 --> 00:10:39,119
Boom!
Yeah.
242
00:10:39,121 --> 00:10:41,453
Okay.
Ali. Ali! [sighs]
243
00:10:41,455 --> 00:10:43,988
Look.
So I'm gonna be honest with you.
244
00:10:45,055 --> 00:10:47,055
You don't connect well with men.
245
00:10:47,955 --> 00:10:50,353
That means you're doing great
in your lane.
246
00:10:50,355 --> 00:10:53,989
So, let's just stay
in your lane.
247
00:10:55,188 --> 00:10:58,389
Okay?
Okay. Are you finished?
248
00:10:59,122 --> 00:11:00,588
- Yeah, I'm good.
- Great.
249
00:11:00,590 --> 00:11:03,255
I have to go get back
in my female lane.
250
00:11:04,222 --> 00:11:06,855
Have a great day, dick...
I mean, Nick.
251
00:11:06,857 --> 00:11:07,821
What'd I say?
252
00:11:07,823 --> 00:11:10,556
[upbeat music]
253
00:11:11,390 --> 00:11:12,556
[chatter]
254
00:11:13,922 --> 00:11:15,523
Listen up, assholes!
255
00:11:16,356 --> 00:11:19,688
I am personally going to sign
Jamal Barry.
256
00:11:19,690 --> 00:11:21,756
Uhh.
This is fair warning.
257
00:11:21,758 --> 00:11:25,289
Buckle up, backstabbing bitches.
258
00:11:35,056 --> 00:11:36,389
Hey, Ali, how you doing?
259
00:11:36,391 --> 00:11:38,255
Fan-fucking-tastic.
Couldn't be better!
260
00:11:38,257 --> 00:11:39,756
[man] Hey, Skip!
Your daughter's here.
261
00:11:39,758 --> 00:11:41,055
Hey, Dad!
262
00:11:41,057 --> 00:11:42,455
Hey, you're early.
Yeah.
263
00:11:42,457 --> 00:11:43,357
Break.
264
00:11:44,924 --> 00:11:47,489
Doesn't look like you're headed
for a celebratory dinner.
265
00:11:47,491 --> 00:11:52,255
No, because they made
a 31-year-old suck-up partner.
266
00:11:52,257 --> 00:11:54,021
But I'm good, Daddy.
You know why?
267
00:11:54,023 --> 00:11:57,390
Because I go high
when they go low.
268
00:11:57,392 --> 00:12:00,189
- You want to talk about it?
- Yes, I want to talk!
269
00:12:00,191 --> 00:12:02,456
Let me just get
these hand wraps...
270
00:12:02,458 --> 00:12:07,091
These hand wraps are...
Gets me so... [grunts]
271
00:12:08,058 --> 00:12:11,356
I work harder than all of 'em.
I do my job better.
272
00:12:11,358 --> 00:12:13,223
And they're still trying
to hold me down.
273
00:12:13,225 --> 00:12:16,091
They hit you,
you hit back even harder.
274
00:12:16,493 --> 00:12:18,156
You got you.
275
00:12:18,158 --> 00:12:20,591
You hear me? You got you.
276
00:12:20,593 --> 00:12:23,424
How am I supposed to fight a system
that's rigged against me, Daddy, huh?
277
00:12:23,426 --> 00:12:24,691
Tell me that!
278
00:12:24,693 --> 00:12:28,224
You deliver on your word.
You sign Jamal Barry.
279
00:12:28,226 --> 00:12:30,192
Then you're undeniable.
280
00:12:31,726 --> 00:12:33,591
You're right. You're right!
281
00:12:33,593 --> 00:12:34,794
Just shake the shit off.
282
00:12:35,326 --> 00:12:38,059
I got me. I got me.
283
00:12:38,926 --> 00:12:40,092
Come on.
284
00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:42,292
And soon...
285
00:12:43,092 --> 00:12:45,458
I'm gonna sign Jamal Barry.
286
00:12:45,460 --> 00:12:48,494
That's it,
that's it, that's it. Yeah.
287
00:12:49,794 --> 00:12:52,527
Yes! Break. [laughs]
288
00:12:53,293 --> 00:12:55,358
- Good talk, good talk.
- Thanks, Daddy.
289
00:12:55,360 --> 00:12:58,358
- Oh! Ho-ho-ho!
- I didn't hear the bell.
290
00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:01,091
That's my girl. That's my girl.
291
00:13:01,093 --> 00:13:02,394
I love you.
292
00:13:02,828 --> 00:13:07,493
[sighs] I can't believe I leased
that stupid expensive Porsche.
293
00:13:07,495 --> 00:13:11,026
[groans] I just knew
I was gonna get it this time.
294
00:13:11,762 --> 00:13:13,461
Fake it till you make it, girl.
295
00:13:16,094 --> 00:13:17,961
Who is that new bartender?
296
00:13:19,328 --> 00:13:21,628
Oh, that's Will.
He's been here a couple of months.
297
00:13:25,561 --> 00:13:28,660
Uh, you know what, Dad? I think I'm
gonna stay and have another drink.
298
00:13:28,662 --> 00:13:30,059
Uh-huh.
299
00:13:30,061 --> 00:13:31,627
I got the bill, don't worry.
Yeah, yeah.
300
00:13:31,629 --> 00:13:34,994
Thank you for my pep talk.
Oh, you're welcome.
301
00:13:36,027 --> 00:13:37,161
[kisses]
302
00:13:38,195 --> 00:13:40,394
Don't look at me like that.
303
00:13:40,396 --> 00:13:44,028
[hip-hop song
playing on speakers]
304
00:13:58,928 --> 00:14:00,028
Hi.
305
00:14:00,663 --> 00:14:01,661
Hi.
306
00:14:01,663 --> 00:14:03,428
So, what you mixing?
307
00:14:03,430 --> 00:14:06,395
How about a bespoke cocktail
tailored specifically for you?
308
00:14:06,397 --> 00:14:08,927
- For me?
- Let me just get a look at you.
309
00:14:08,929 --> 00:14:10,194
[laughs]
310
00:14:10,196 --> 00:14:12,228
No, don't laugh.
Wait a minute.
311
00:14:12,230 --> 00:14:13,863
All right,
now turn this way.
312
00:14:13,865 --> 00:14:15,430
Turn the other way.
313
00:14:16,929 --> 00:14:18,961
Okay. I got you.
314
00:14:18,963 --> 00:14:20,498
Okay.
315
00:14:21,929 --> 00:14:24,829
Oh, oh, no, no, no,
I'm not a vodka girl.
316
00:14:24,831 --> 00:14:27,596
I really like whiskey.
I like dark.
317
00:14:27,598 --> 00:14:29,496
Oh, do you?
Mm-hmm.
318
00:14:29,498 --> 00:14:31,562
Would you go to a symphony,
hop up on stage
319
00:14:31,564 --> 00:14:33,895
and tell the conductor
he needs more cello?
320
00:14:33,897 --> 00:14:37,164
Probably, but go ahead.
Uh-huh.
321
00:14:41,964 --> 00:14:44,231
Okay. All right.
322
00:14:45,665 --> 00:14:48,064
I call this "The All You."
323
00:14:49,532 --> 00:14:50,663
All me.
324
00:14:50,665 --> 00:14:52,499
All you.
Mm-hmm.
325
00:14:56,365 --> 00:14:57,399
Mmm.
326
00:14:57,799 --> 00:14:59,163
Mmm.
327
00:14:59,165 --> 00:15:01,963
This is really good.
Do I taste rose?
328
00:15:01,965 --> 00:15:05,096
You do. It's the cardamom rose syrup.
I make it myself.
329
00:15:05,098 --> 00:15:09,198
And it pairs perfectly with the Cîroc
you tried to get me to stop pouring.
330
00:15:10,466 --> 00:15:11,566
[chuckles]
331
00:15:12,998 --> 00:15:15,398
Um... Would you like to try it?
332
00:15:15,400 --> 00:15:18,500
I mean, if you don't mind
sharing my straw.
333
00:15:23,666 --> 00:15:24,666
Uh...
334
00:15:25,932 --> 00:15:28,166
[music continues]
335
00:15:36,634 --> 00:15:39,099
["Push It" playing]
[laughter]
336
00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:43,367
[laughs, moans]
Yeah.
337
00:15:44,134 --> 00:15:46,831
Where'd you say
your bedroom was? Huh?
338
00:15:46,833 --> 00:15:48,365
Oh! Over there?
339
00:15:48,367 --> 00:15:51,599
It's, uh...
somewhere back there.
340
00:15:51,601 --> 00:15:52,898
Go find it.
341
00:15:52,900 --> 00:15:55,265
Ooh, girl,
what I'm about to do to you!
342
00:15:55,267 --> 00:15:57,365
Yeah, show me, papi!
343
00:15:57,367 --> 00:15:58,635
Oh, yeah.
344
00:15:59,933 --> 00:16:01,600
To the left.
Wait.
345
00:16:01,602 --> 00:16:03,533
To the left.
To the right, to the right! [groans]
346
00:16:03,535 --> 00:16:05,965
- Wait, hold... [groans]
- To the left!
347
00:16:05,967 --> 00:16:07,233
Ah! Can we talk about...
348
00:16:07,235 --> 00:16:10,099
Oh!
Ow! Ah, ah!
349
00:16:10,101 --> 00:16:12,568
- [Ali screams]
- Hold on! Ah... [laughs]
350
00:16:12,968 --> 00:16:14,566
Uh!
351
00:16:14,568 --> 00:16:15,500
[groans]
352
00:16:15,502 --> 00:16:17,899
Uh... Okay.
353
00:16:17,901 --> 00:16:19,435
Uh...
Ooh.
354
00:16:20,503 --> 00:16:23,032
[both laugh]
355
00:16:23,034 --> 00:16:24,066
[Ali groans]
356
00:16:24,068 --> 00:16:25,199
[Will groans in pain] Oh!
357
00:16:25,201 --> 00:16:27,032
Oh, that's it!
Oh, my God!
358
00:16:27,034 --> 00:16:29,300
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
359
00:16:29,302 --> 00:16:30,999
[Will] I can't breathe!
I can't breathe!
360
00:16:31,001 --> 00:16:33,567
[Ali groaning angrily]
[muffled cries]
361
00:16:33,569 --> 00:16:36,000
Whoa! Ah! Ah!
362
00:16:36,002 --> 00:16:39,267
Ooh! Ooh, ooh.
363
00:16:39,269 --> 00:16:41,169
That was great.
364
00:16:44,935 --> 00:16:46,136
[sighs]
365
00:16:47,704 --> 00:16:48,834
Yeah.
366
00:16:48,836 --> 00:16:51,069
[music continues]
367
00:16:55,935 --> 00:16:57,070
[grunts]
368
00:17:01,337 --> 00:17:03,404
[snoring]
369
00:17:06,936 --> 00:17:09,203
- [birds chirping]
- [dogs barking]
370
00:17:11,871 --> 00:17:13,338
[child laughs]
371
00:17:15,070 --> 00:17:16,869
Who are you?
I'm Ben.
372
00:17:16,871 --> 00:17:19,338
I hope it's okay
I borrowed your mask.
373
00:17:20,138 --> 00:17:22,605
Welcome to Wakanda.
374
00:17:24,505 --> 00:17:25,569
[chuckles]
375
00:17:25,571 --> 00:17:26,569
What?
376
00:17:26,571 --> 00:17:27,505
Hey, Ben.
377
00:17:27,937 --> 00:17:29,870
Ben. Ben! Oh, uh.
378
00:17:29,872 --> 00:17:31,536
Hey. Hey, buddy.
379
00:17:31,538 --> 00:17:33,369
I thought Brody's dad
was dropping you off at 10:00.
380
00:17:33,371 --> 00:17:34,836
It's 10:05.
381
00:17:34,838 --> 00:17:36,770
10:05...
Oh, okay, uh...
382
00:17:36,772 --> 00:17:39,202
Go... Go play with some Legos.
Daddy's getting up.
383
00:17:39,204 --> 00:17:40,504
Now go, go play.
I... I need...
384
00:17:40,506 --> 00:17:42,803
- I need my, uh, my mask.
- The nasty... Oh.
385
00:17:42,805 --> 00:17:46,036
Don't... Close your mouth. Don't breathe.
Don't say nothing. Just...
386
00:17:46,038 --> 00:17:48,237
Can I... Just...
That mask...
387
00:17:48,239 --> 00:17:50,970
The little...
Thank you!
388
00:17:50,972 --> 00:17:52,703
Come on, baby, go.
Just play Legos.
389
00:17:52,705 --> 00:17:56,237
Go play some Legos.
I'ma be there. Daddy's coming.
390
00:17:56,239 --> 00:17:57,538
All right.
You have a kid?
391
00:17:57,540 --> 00:17:58,704
He was at a sleepover.
392
00:17:58,706 --> 00:18:00,471
Obviously,
I did not want him to see this.
393
00:18:00,473 --> 00:18:02,737
Oh, my God.
This is terrible.
394
00:18:02,739 --> 00:18:05,438
Baby, where are you going?
I'm never late.
395
00:18:05,440 --> 00:18:09,106
I'm so late!
I'm so late, so late, so late.
396
00:18:11,806 --> 00:18:13,971
You're married? [sighs]
397
00:18:13,973 --> 00:18:15,405
Wait. No...
398
00:18:15,407 --> 00:18:18,405
Okay, what time does
she get here, huh? 10:18?
399
00:18:18,407 --> 00:18:19,937
- Jerk!
- It's not what you think...
400
00:18:19,939 --> 00:18:21,574
[door closes]
401
00:18:22,173 --> 00:18:24,240
I knew
that wasn't a mask.
402
00:18:24,608 --> 00:18:26,341
[slurping]
403
00:18:26,740 --> 00:18:30,608
[Ethan] 45K. I know it's a starter
model for me, but I'm in the game now.
404
00:18:30,939 --> 00:18:32,239
[clears throat]
405
00:18:32,241 --> 00:18:33,705
Ali, hey, hey!
Good of you to join us.
406
00:18:33,707 --> 00:18:35,904
Hey! You know Devonta and
John, right?
407
00:18:35,906 --> 00:18:37,305
Devonta, of course!
Yeah.
408
00:18:37,307 --> 00:18:40,038
I love your hair like that.
Your hair...
409
00:18:40,040 --> 00:18:41,439
Thank you! Hey, John.
410
00:18:41,441 --> 00:18:43,072
I can't see your hair
all the way up there.
411
00:18:43,074 --> 00:18:44,873
Good to see you, though.
412
00:18:44,875 --> 00:18:46,773
- Hey, you got a little some...
- Hey, no, you got something!
413
00:18:46,775 --> 00:18:48,139
Don't you try that, cutie.
414
00:18:48,141 --> 00:18:49,540
Thank God, you're here.
Yes.
415
00:18:49,542 --> 00:18:51,507
We have
a center-position situation.
416
00:18:51,509 --> 00:18:53,440
No, we don't have a
situation, we have a contract.
417
00:18:53,442 --> 00:18:55,373
That's the situation.
Okay.
418
00:18:55,375 --> 00:18:57,606
Uh, not asking, just informing:
you have a condom on your back.
419
00:18:57,608 --> 00:18:59,473
A what?
You have a condom on your back.
420
00:18:59,475 --> 00:19:02,340
A what? Oh, my God. Get it off.
Get it off! Get it off!
421
00:19:02,342 --> 00:19:04,774
Please remember this when
you're considering my raise.
422
00:19:04,776 --> 00:19:06,840
Yeah, take it to your grave
or I will kill you.
423
00:19:06,842 --> 00:19:08,240
[inhales]
424
00:19:08,242 --> 00:19:10,273
[Ali] What is
this center-position bullshit?
425
00:19:10,275 --> 00:19:12,874
Which asshole in here doesn't
understand the concept of a contract?
426
00:19:12,876 --> 00:19:14,574
Hold...
Kevin!
427
00:19:14,576 --> 00:19:16,008
Do not talk over me.
428
00:19:16,941 --> 00:19:18,441
Tell whichever asshole here
429
00:19:18,443 --> 00:19:21,039
who wants to try to bump Lisa
from center position
430
00:19:21,041 --> 00:19:22,441
- to step to me...
- Okay.
431
00:19:22,443 --> 00:19:24,307
...and not hide behind
you motherfuckers.
432
00:19:24,309 --> 00:19:25,573
Great.
433
00:19:25,575 --> 00:19:27,408
Tell him yourself
'cause he's right behind you.
434
00:19:27,410 --> 00:19:28,141
Where?
435
00:19:28,143 --> 00:19:30,007
[laughs] Peek-a-boo.
436
00:19:30,009 --> 00:19:31,708
Business rule number one:
437
00:19:31,710 --> 00:19:34,341
You should never call somebody
an asshole behind they back.
438
00:19:34,343 --> 00:19:36,207
- You know who said that?
- No, I do not.
439
00:19:36,209 --> 00:19:38,274
- Asparagus Chevrolet.
- Who?
440
00:19:38,276 --> 00:19:41,741
You know, a co-founder
of General Motors, 1884.
441
00:19:41,743 --> 00:19:45,974
Ali Davis, meet Joe Dolla,
Jamal Barry's father.
442
00:19:45,976 --> 00:19:48,875
[Joe laughs] And manager.
443
00:19:48,877 --> 00:19:50,375
And bodyguard.
444
00:19:50,377 --> 00:19:53,041
And psychologist
and nutritionist
445
00:19:53,043 --> 00:19:55,975
and trainer and sociologist
and urologist.
446
00:19:55,977 --> 00:19:57,574
That means everything.
447
00:19:57,576 --> 00:19:59,744
Wow, that's a lot. Uh...
Mm-hmm.
448
00:20:00,478 --> 00:20:02,443
You know the second rule
of business?
449
00:20:02,445 --> 00:20:04,343
There's always
a win-win situation
450
00:20:04,345 --> 00:20:07,075
where everyone walks away happy.
You like that?
451
00:20:07,077 --> 00:20:08,675
I know that's right.
452
00:20:08,677 --> 00:20:11,510
But it don't always happen
like that in sports. It don't.
453
00:20:11,512 --> 00:20:12,742
Somebody got to win,
454
00:20:12,744 --> 00:20:15,009
and somebody got to taste
the agony of defeat,
455
00:20:15,011 --> 00:20:16,742
like that blind ski jumper.
456
00:20:16,744 --> 00:20:18,777
Yeah. It's a lethal day.
457
00:20:18,779 --> 00:20:20,777
Decapitated.
Just help us out here, please?
458
00:20:20,779 --> 00:20:23,176
- Ali D!
- Lisa!
459
00:20:23,178 --> 00:20:26,909
Hey, girl, look at you!
Six feet five inches of perfect.
460
00:20:26,911 --> 00:20:28,178
What's the holdup here?
461
00:20:28,512 --> 00:20:31,576
Yeah, I was gonna come over
and talk to you about that.
462
00:20:31,578 --> 00:20:35,610
We were talking about the cover
image, and... [sighs]
463
00:20:35,612 --> 00:20:37,610
of course, you're guaranteed
center position.
464
00:20:37,612 --> 00:20:43,079
But we were... we were thinking
that maybe you'd split it
465
00:20:43,713 --> 00:20:45,377
with, um, Jamal Barry,
466
00:20:45,379 --> 00:20:47,646
the projected number-one
NBA draft pick?
467
00:20:47,737 --> 00:20:49,503
- Split it?
- Mm-hmm.
468
00:20:49,505 --> 00:20:52,735
Let me ask you guys a question.
Are you good at math?
469
00:20:52,737 --> 00:20:54,568
Yes, summa cum laude.
Not my strong suit.
470
00:20:54,570 --> 00:20:56,037
I got through.
471
00:20:56,039 --> 00:20:58,436
So how many championships
does Jamal Barry have?
472
00:20:58,438 --> 00:21:02,136
None. But this is the "Legends
and Rising Stars" issue.
473
00:21:02,138 --> 00:21:06,070
I have two championships,
three MVPs, and four gold medals.
474
00:21:06,072 --> 00:21:09,237
Now add that up and you tell me if
I'm gonna share my magazine cover
475
00:21:09,239 --> 00:21:12,270
with whatever dude is here
or the flavor of the month.
476
00:21:12,272 --> 00:21:13,805
Uh...
477
00:21:15,272 --> 00:21:17,971
Okay. You're right.
You are right.
478
00:21:17,973 --> 00:21:20,170
Give the woman the throne,
gents!
479
00:21:20,172 --> 00:21:23,771
She's earned it.
And we have a contract.
480
00:21:23,773 --> 00:21:27,004
Boom! I'm so glad my agents
are mad geniuses.
481
00:21:27,006 --> 00:21:28,904
And Ali, you got an old
wine stain on your blouse.
482
00:21:28,906 --> 00:21:32,004
[laughs] Girl, yes,
wine next week! Your house.
483
00:21:32,006 --> 00:21:34,137
- So, you mentioned win-win.
- Yes.
484
00:21:34,139 --> 00:21:35,937
And I ate all those shrimps
over there.
485
00:21:35,939 --> 00:21:37,672
You understand? So, I win.
486
00:21:37,939 --> 00:21:40,771
My son Jamal is not gonna be
a part of this photo shoot.
487
00:21:40,773 --> 00:21:43,704
You lose. Now watch this.
488
00:21:43,706 --> 00:21:45,041
Jamal, let's go!
489
00:21:47,240 --> 00:21:48,271
[Ethan clears throat]
490
00:21:48,273 --> 00:21:50,538
Jamal, it was... [sighs]
491
00:21:50,540 --> 00:21:51,740
...very nice to...
492
00:21:53,073 --> 00:21:55,372
Well, that could've gone worse.
How?
493
00:21:55,374 --> 00:21:57,940
Could've noticed the used condom
on your back earlier.
494
00:21:58,673 --> 00:21:59,905
That was a rubber glove.
495
00:21:59,907 --> 00:22:02,038
I was dyeing my hair,
you asshole.
496
00:22:02,040 --> 00:22:04,640
Yeah...
dyeing your hair with semen.
497
00:22:05,774 --> 00:22:07,439
[woman 1]
So, the wine gal at Rite Aid
498
00:22:07,441 --> 00:22:10,172
said this was their bestseller
for bachelorette parties.
499
00:22:10,174 --> 00:22:13,339
[woman 2] Well, your taste in champagne
hasn't evolved much since college,
500
00:22:13,341 --> 00:22:14,839
but down the hatch.
501
00:22:14,841 --> 00:22:16,572
[woman 3] Kinda Chablis
meets NyQuil and bleach.
502
00:22:16,574 --> 00:22:18,006
Oh, it's burnt.
[Ali] Hello, everyone!
503
00:22:18,008 --> 00:22:19,973
Hey, girl.
Sorry I'm late.
504
00:22:19,975 --> 00:22:22,606
- [all cheer]
- [woman 3] Ah. Look at you and your boobies.
505
00:22:22,608 --> 00:22:23,873
[Ali]
I picked up some champagne.
506
00:22:23,875 --> 00:22:25,006
[woman 3] Thank God,
real champagne!
507
00:22:25,008 --> 00:22:26,839
Good. Because mine sucked.
508
00:22:26,841 --> 00:22:29,240
[woman 3] Happy last days of
being a single woman, cousin.
509
00:22:29,242 --> 00:22:30,639
Lots of dicks here.
510
00:22:30,641 --> 00:22:32,206
[woman 2]
Okay, you need to put that down.
511
00:22:32,208 --> 00:22:33,639
[Ali groans]
Oh.
512
00:22:33,641 --> 00:22:34,974
[woman 2] What'd I miss?
[woman 3] Uh-oh.
513
00:22:34,976 --> 00:22:36,539
- [woman 3] Oh, I know that face.
- Ali...
514
00:22:36,541 --> 00:22:38,073
Yeah.
[woman 2] Oh.
515
00:22:38,075 --> 00:22:39,840
You didn't make partner,
did you?
516
00:22:39,842 --> 00:22:42,206
Did that little shit Brandon
text you?
517
00:22:42,208 --> 00:22:46,707
Uh, no, your half-ass angry
smile kinda gave it all away.
518
00:22:46,709 --> 00:22:48,740
I just can't believe that Nick
519
00:22:48,742 --> 00:22:51,376
tried to sell me
some bullshit about how...
520
00:22:52,008 --> 00:22:54,176
how I don't connect with men.
521
00:22:54,675 --> 00:22:55,975
Can you believe that?
522
00:22:55,977 --> 00:22:57,141
Mm.
523
00:22:57,143 --> 00:22:58,043
[Ali] Me!
524
00:22:58,410 --> 00:23:00,207
[woman 1] I mean, it...
[woman 3] Uh...
525
00:23:00,209 --> 00:23:01,841
What? [woman 3] Uh,
let me see that bottle.
526
00:23:01,843 --> 00:23:03,843
- Nothing!
- [woman 3] Nothing, I...
527
00:23:04,410 --> 00:23:06,241
Mm. Mm-mm-mm.
528
00:23:06,243 --> 00:23:08,674
Well... I don't get it.
529
00:23:08,676 --> 00:23:11,775
Right? I grew up around men
all my life.
530
00:23:11,777 --> 00:23:13,708
- Like, fuck him!
- [woman 1] Mm, Ali...
531
00:23:13,710 --> 00:23:15,375
I think I'm gonna call a Lyft.
532
00:23:15,377 --> 00:23:19,878
No. No. No one's calling
anything, because...
533
00:23:20,576 --> 00:23:22,909
- we should be smoking up.
- Ciarra!
534
00:23:22,911 --> 00:23:25,275
I haven't smoked that
in 25 years.
535
00:23:25,277 --> 00:23:28,778
I'm high on Christ.
I don't need it anymore.
536
00:23:29,277 --> 00:23:31,308
Okay, so... [chuckles]
537
00:23:31,310 --> 00:23:34,776
I have a special surprise
for you ladies.
538
00:23:34,778 --> 00:23:36,876
[Ali] Oh.
I love surprises.
539
00:23:36,878 --> 00:23:42,542
Now, we all know that Mari and James
have a bright and shiny future. Okay?
540
00:23:42,544 --> 00:23:44,575
But specifics are good, right?
541
00:23:44,577 --> 00:23:46,942
So I hired a psychic. Come on.
542
00:23:46,944 --> 00:23:49,343
Come on! Yes!
[Ali] That's really sweet, Olivia.
543
00:23:49,345 --> 00:23:54,176
But don't nobody want no Dionne
Warwick psychic-hotline con artist
544
00:23:54,178 --> 00:23:56,243
spinning bullshit
about our past.
545
00:23:56,245 --> 00:23:59,545
Okay, well, she's already here,
and she probably can hear you, so...
546
00:24:00,612 --> 00:24:01,810
Ah.
547
00:24:01,812 --> 00:24:05,046
[mystical music playing]
548
00:24:22,212 --> 00:24:23,345
Where did you find her?
549
00:24:23,347 --> 00:24:25,780
Facebook.
What?
550
00:24:26,247 --> 00:24:28,447
All right, ladies...
551
00:24:29,347 --> 00:24:35,980
our spiritual journey tonight
will begin with...
552
00:24:38,313 --> 00:24:41,480
Oh! [speaking in tongues]
553
00:24:42,747 --> 00:24:44,578
[chanting] ♪ Old school
players To new school fools ♪
554
00:24:44,580 --> 00:24:46,111
♪ Kast keep it jumpin'... ♪
555
00:24:46,113 --> 00:24:47,078
[mumbling]
556
00:24:47,080 --> 00:24:48,413
♪ Nigga be tryin' to... ♪
557
00:24:48,415 --> 00:24:49,645
♪ Ain't your mama pretty ♪
558
00:24:49,647 --> 00:24:51,312
♪ Got meatballs in her titty ♪
559
00:24:51,314 --> 00:24:52,814
Bee-otch!
560
00:24:53,281 --> 00:24:55,279
[mumbling, humming]
561
00:24:55,281 --> 00:24:56,181
[gasps, stomps]
562
00:25:04,248 --> 00:25:05,214
You.
563
00:25:07,081 --> 00:25:08,081
My card.
564
00:25:09,148 --> 00:25:10,148
Um... [chuckles]
565
00:25:12,482 --> 00:25:14,114
Please tap these cards.
566
00:25:19,648 --> 00:25:20,748
Thank you.
567
00:25:25,982 --> 00:25:26,882
Hmm.
568
00:25:30,982 --> 00:25:32,015
Hmm!
569
00:25:33,616 --> 00:25:34,716
Mm.
570
00:25:36,082 --> 00:25:38,616
Mmm. Mmm!
571
00:25:39,483 --> 00:25:44,616
Mmm! Mmm! Mmm! Mmm!
572
00:25:45,250 --> 00:25:46,216
Mmm!
573
00:25:46,549 --> 00:25:49,050
Uh! Uh!
574
00:25:50,283 --> 00:25:51,849
[screams]
575
00:25:54,816 --> 00:25:57,181
It says here you're
having problems at work.
576
00:25:57,183 --> 00:26:00,814
Yeah, you heard me
talking to my girlfriends.
577
00:26:00,816 --> 00:26:03,615
Mm-hmm. Mm, mm. Mm!
578
00:26:03,617 --> 00:26:08,015
There's a man there who does
not want you to succeed.
579
00:26:08,017 --> 00:26:10,315
Uh, he feels threatened by you.
580
00:26:10,317 --> 00:26:12,382
Ah. A man? Try a dozen.
581
00:26:12,384 --> 00:26:16,117
There's also a man who you
will have a relationship with.
582
00:26:17,917 --> 00:26:20,251
And his name begins with...
583
00:26:22,317 --> 00:26:23,251
W.
584
00:26:26,385 --> 00:26:27,948
Will?
Wait, ho...
585
00:26:27,950 --> 00:26:30,582
How did you know that?
How the fuck did you know that?
586
00:26:30,584 --> 00:26:32,116
[stammers]
587
00:26:32,118 --> 00:26:34,749
Were you spying on me
at the Highland Tap last night?
588
00:26:34,751 --> 00:26:36,250
Ma'am, I don't even know
who you are.
589
00:26:36,252 --> 00:26:38,350
Plus, I'm 19 years sober.
590
00:26:38,352 --> 00:26:42,150
If you don't count the weed
and the peyote and the crack.
591
00:26:42,152 --> 00:26:43,285
Crack?
592
00:26:44,719 --> 00:26:47,420
I was just kidding. [laughs]
593
00:26:47,918 --> 00:26:49,486
Fuck the goddamn shit.
594
00:26:50,453 --> 00:26:53,186
You want to know
how to connect with men, right?
595
00:26:53,851 --> 00:26:55,484
Uh...
Well, I can help you
596
00:26:55,486 --> 00:26:57,751
open your inner portal.
597
00:26:58,619 --> 00:26:59,783
Yeah.
598
00:26:59,785 --> 00:27:02,650
So, let's just... have some tea.
599
00:27:02,652 --> 00:27:05,718
Oh, I don't really like tea.
No, no, have some.
600
00:27:05,720 --> 00:27:07,750
[Ali]
Oh, what's that smell?
601
00:27:07,752 --> 00:27:10,584
Oh, that's
the fey lougawou plant.
602
00:27:10,586 --> 00:27:12,618
It's an extract from Haiti.
603
00:27:12,620 --> 00:27:14,053
Then I can read you.
604
00:27:20,553 --> 00:27:21,653
Just take a sip.
605
00:27:22,553 --> 00:27:25,584
Go on, take a sip. Relax.
606
00:27:25,586 --> 00:27:26,686
Ew.
Oh.
607
00:27:29,220 --> 00:27:30,320
Whoa, yes!
608
00:27:31,720 --> 00:27:33,318
Now...
[gagging]
609
00:27:33,320 --> 00:27:35,320
[women gasping]
Oh, yeah, drink it.
610
00:27:35,953 --> 00:27:37,887
Get it down. Sip it.
Uh...
611
00:27:38,587 --> 00:27:42,652
Oh. Travel within.
Feel yourself.
612
00:27:42,654 --> 00:27:45,753
Feel it. Relax.
613
00:27:46,255 --> 00:27:47,388
You are yin...
614
00:27:47,954 --> 00:27:49,821
and you are yang. [echoing]
615
00:27:52,088 --> 00:27:55,353
You are both male and female.
616
00:27:55,355 --> 00:27:57,486
[moaning]
617
00:27:57,488 --> 00:27:59,919
Ali. Oh, feel it all inside.
618
00:27:59,921 --> 00:28:00,952
[tribal music playing]
619
00:28:00,954 --> 00:28:03,021
Let it work your insides.
620
00:28:04,221 --> 00:28:05,423
You are yin...
621
00:28:05,888 --> 00:28:06,952
Do you feel it?
622
00:28:06,954 --> 00:28:09,156
...and you are yang.
623
00:28:09,821 --> 00:28:11,354
Journey within.
624
00:28:11,356 --> 00:28:15,487
Hear your inner,
inner, inner voice.
625
00:28:15,489 --> 00:28:16,553
Ali.
626
00:28:16,555 --> 00:28:18,187
[hip-hop music playing]
627
00:28:18,189 --> 00:28:20,089
[Olivia] I'm ready to
shake a tail feather!
628
00:28:21,289 --> 00:28:24,220
We didn't get enough of that bong.
Hey, Lyft driver!
629
00:28:24,222 --> 00:28:27,422
Are you ready for the girls?
Whoo!
630
00:28:27,424 --> 00:28:30,087
The party bus has arrived!
Yes!
631
00:28:30,089 --> 00:28:31,953
[Ciarra] Bitch said
my fashion was terrible.
632
00:28:31,955 --> 00:28:34,955
[Mari] Oh, that was so much fun.
It was such a great reading.
633
00:28:36,123 --> 00:28:38,190
[crowd cheering]
634
00:28:39,856 --> 00:28:43,090
[music continues]
635
00:29:03,024 --> 00:29:05,389
[Mari] Whoa, whoa, whoa,
take it easy, girl.
636
00:29:05,391 --> 00:29:08,822
I don't want to spend my special night
holding your hair out of the toilet.
637
00:29:08,824 --> 00:29:11,158
No, girl, I'm good.
[Mari] Okay.
638
00:29:11,891 --> 00:29:14,056
I don't know
if it's that freaky tea
639
00:29:14,058 --> 00:29:16,889
or if it's all the weed
and the Hennessy,
640
00:29:16,891 --> 00:29:19,390
but honey, I am feeling it!
641
00:29:19,392 --> 00:29:22,357
Is anybody else feeling...
[whistles]
642
00:29:22,359 --> 00:29:24,958
["Hoochie Mama" playing]
643
00:29:26,359 --> 00:29:27,958
[crowd cheering]
644
00:29:31,426 --> 00:29:33,025
[song continues]
645
00:29:34,992 --> 00:29:38,257
[squealing] That's my song!
646
00:29:38,259 --> 00:29:40,856
Uh, actually, it's my song.
[chuckles]
647
00:29:40,858 --> 00:29:42,623
Oh!
You... You remember?
648
00:29:42,625 --> 00:29:44,191
Before I started
following the Lord,
649
00:29:44,193 --> 00:29:47,124
I was following 2 Live Crew
on tour.
650
00:29:47,126 --> 00:29:49,890
It's true, it's so true.
Oh, my God!
651
00:29:49,892 --> 00:29:53,124
Little secret here...
this song is about me. Shh.
652
00:29:53,126 --> 00:29:55,893
[laughs]
[blows whistle]
653
00:29:58,493 --> 00:29:59,626
All right.
654
00:30:02,626 --> 00:30:05,659
Okay, I gotta go.
I gotta go. Move.
655
00:30:07,893 --> 00:30:09,194
[blows whistle]
656
00:30:18,261 --> 00:30:20,127
Ooh!
Whoo!
657
00:30:20,592 --> 00:30:22,227
[song continues]
658
00:30:27,860 --> 00:30:29,960
[singing along]
659
00:30:34,960 --> 00:30:37,328
Oh, someone had
too much whiskey tonight.
660
00:30:40,727 --> 00:30:42,228
[sings]
661
00:30:45,262 --> 00:30:46,162
Whoo!
662
00:30:48,928 --> 00:30:49,861
Whoo!
663
00:30:57,928 --> 00:30:58,692
Whoo!
664
00:30:58,694 --> 00:31:00,229
Ah! Ah!
665
00:31:00,661 --> 00:31:01,826
[crowd gasps]
666
00:31:01,828 --> 00:31:03,861
[music fades]
667
00:31:07,628 --> 00:31:10,227
[intercom beeps]
[PA, indistinct]
668
00:31:10,229 --> 00:31:12,760
Oh. Morning, Ms. Davis.
[chuckles]
669
00:31:12,762 --> 00:31:14,827
All your signs look good,
670
00:31:14,829 --> 00:31:18,996
but I'm gonna check your vitals once more
before we release you back in the wild.
671
00:31:20,096 --> 00:31:22,094
[doctor's voice] Thank God
this one didn't die on me.
672
00:31:22,096 --> 00:31:25,062
Some dickweed shoves a whole
hairdryer into his rectum,
673
00:31:25,064 --> 00:31:26,928
electrocutes himself
in the shower,
674
00:31:26,930 --> 00:31:28,727
but somehow I'm responsible.
675
00:31:28,729 --> 00:31:30,328
I mean, who does that?
676
00:31:30,330 --> 00:31:32,062
Um, excuse me.
677
00:31:32,064 --> 00:31:33,528
Hmm?
Doc.
678
00:31:33,530 --> 00:31:35,028
Did you say something?
679
00:31:35,030 --> 00:31:35,897
No.
680
00:31:36,563 --> 00:31:38,262
You did. You said something
681
00:31:38,264 --> 00:31:42,064
about some dude
shoving a hairdryer up his ass.
682
00:31:43,130 --> 00:31:45,594
- I don't think I did.
- No, I heard you.
683
00:31:45,596 --> 00:31:46,961
And that's... that's weird.
684
00:31:46,963 --> 00:31:49,265
That's something
very weird to say.
685
00:31:50,298 --> 00:31:52,129
Oh, well, anyway, uh...
686
00:31:52,131 --> 00:31:54,531
Blood pressure's normal.
All good.
687
00:31:54,798 --> 00:31:56,862
I must be losing it.
688
00:31:56,864 --> 00:31:59,962
Starting today, no more drinking at work.
Just cocaine.
689
00:31:59,964 --> 00:32:03,296
Hey! Why are you telling
me about your coke problem?
690
00:32:03,298 --> 00:32:06,263
A, it makes me very uncomfortable.
You're a doctor.
691
00:32:06,265 --> 00:32:08,798
And B,
just too much information.
692
00:32:10,131 --> 00:32:12,695
- I didn't say anything.
- You did.
693
00:32:12,697 --> 00:32:14,796
- Are you taping this?
- What?
694
00:32:14,798 --> 00:32:16,232
I'm calling a lawyer.
695
00:32:17,266 --> 00:32:18,832
You need rehab.
696
00:32:19,597 --> 00:32:20,897
Where's my cell phone?
697
00:32:20,899 --> 00:32:22,963
Oh, you're okay. Hallelujah.
698
00:32:22,965 --> 00:32:25,531
Praise the Lord.
I've been praying and fasting all night.
699
00:32:25,533 --> 00:32:27,997
- I'm starving! Muah, muah.
- Oh, you are so dramatic.
700
00:32:27,999 --> 00:32:29,630
And my knees are killing me.
701
00:32:29,632 --> 00:32:31,431
Hey, girl, I got some Combos.
Raided the vending machine!
702
00:32:31,433 --> 00:32:34,797
This place
smells like gonorrhea. Ugh!
703
00:32:34,799 --> 00:32:36,365
- What did you say?
- Hmm?
704
00:32:36,367 --> 00:32:39,131
- Ms. Davis, you're free to go.
- Oh, finally!
705
00:32:39,133 --> 00:32:41,397
I can take you home
or I brought work clothes.
706
00:32:41,399 --> 00:32:42,864
Work.
707
00:32:42,866 --> 00:32:44,531
Ali, can't you
take it easy for a change?
708
00:32:44,533 --> 00:32:45,964
No, no, no. Don't do that.
709
00:32:45,966 --> 00:32:48,000
You know what,
close that so I can get dressed.
710
00:32:49,833 --> 00:32:51,564
Hey, queen.
Hi, how are you?
711
00:32:51,566 --> 00:32:54,231
I'm good.
So... here's the T.
712
00:32:54,233 --> 00:32:57,098
We had a bachelorette party last
night, and we're a little hung over.
713
00:32:57,100 --> 00:33:00,697
So if you could just
hook us up with some... Oxy?
714
00:33:00,699 --> 00:33:02,465
No, ma'am, I'm sorry.
I can't do that.
715
00:33:02,467 --> 00:33:03,866
Darvocet?
716
00:33:04,301 --> 00:33:05,234
Percocet?
717
00:33:06,201 --> 00:33:07,999
Any 'cets?
718
00:33:08,001 --> 00:33:10,965
All the 'cets? Oh, you nasty!
All the 'cets?
719
00:33:10,967 --> 00:33:12,698
No, ma'am,
we can't do that. Sorry.
720
00:33:12,700 --> 00:33:15,832
Okay, this is gonna
change your mind.
721
00:33:15,834 --> 00:33:17,365
Gonna blow your mind.
722
00:33:17,367 --> 00:33:19,299
- No, I'm sorry.
- Meet me on eight.
723
00:33:19,301 --> 00:33:20,799
Girl, I can't do transactions
in public like this.
724
00:33:20,801 --> 00:33:22,302
On eight, in the closet.
725
00:33:23,335 --> 00:33:26,167
[Ali] Oh, my doctor says
I can't drive for a week.
726
00:33:26,169 --> 00:33:29,935
Which should give me enough time
to find my driver's license.
727
00:33:30,767 --> 00:33:33,267
Which could be anywhere,
after last night.
728
00:33:33,269 --> 00:33:37,100
Well, at least I don't have to peel
used condoms off your back today.
729
00:33:37,102 --> 00:33:38,135
So far.
730
00:33:39,635 --> 00:33:41,833
Okay, stop doing that.
731
00:33:41,835 --> 00:33:43,200
Stop doing what?
732
00:33:43,202 --> 00:33:45,133
Talking
without moving your mouth
733
00:33:45,135 --> 00:33:48,400
and saying rude shit you should
not be saying to your boss.
734
00:33:48,402 --> 00:33:49,866
I swear on my life
735
00:33:49,868 --> 00:33:51,467
I would never say
anything disrespectful
736
00:33:51,469 --> 00:33:52,933
or inappropriate to you ever.
737
00:33:52,935 --> 00:33:55,034
Which is more than
I can say for you.
738
00:33:55,036 --> 00:33:56,766
Right there. You just did it.
739
00:33:56,768 --> 00:33:58,434
You said,
"More than I can say for you."
740
00:33:58,436 --> 00:34:00,599
And then there was that crack
about the condom on my back.
741
00:34:00,601 --> 00:34:03,268
I heard you say it! But I...
[stammers] I didn't say it.
742
00:34:03,270 --> 00:34:04,967
Holy shit,
are you reading my mind?
743
00:34:04,969 --> 00:34:06,435
Because if you can hear
my inner thoughts,
744
00:34:06,437 --> 00:34:08,134
I am super fucked!
745
00:34:08,136 --> 00:34:10,803
I can hear your inner thoughts,
and you are super fucked!
746
00:34:11,237 --> 00:34:13,401
[both scream]
747
00:34:13,403 --> 00:34:14,967
Stop screaming!
748
00:34:14,969 --> 00:34:16,767
[mentally screaming]
I said stop doing that!
749
00:34:16,769 --> 00:34:18,334
Okay, Brandon, pull over.
Okay.
750
00:34:18,336 --> 00:34:20,169
Pull over, I need some air.
I'm pulling over.
751
00:34:20,171 --> 00:34:21,768
I need some air.
Pull over right here!
752
00:34:21,770 --> 00:34:22,870
I'm pulling over!
753
00:34:23,171 --> 00:34:26,301
Stop the fucking car!
I'm stopping the car!
754
00:34:26,303 --> 00:34:27,968
I stopped thinking! I swear!
755
00:34:27,970 --> 00:34:29,469
I'm not screaming inside my head!
Hello? No, no, no, no.
756
00:34:29,471 --> 00:34:31,301
Wait, what are you doing?
You don't do stairs!
757
00:34:31,303 --> 00:34:32,870
What are you doing?
758
00:34:35,371 --> 00:34:36,735
Okay, okay.
759
00:34:36,737 --> 00:34:38,536
[breathes deeply]
760
00:34:38,538 --> 00:34:39,870
Fresh air.
761
00:34:43,072 --> 00:34:46,335
[man 1] Goddamn dog.
I wish I could shit anywhere.
762
00:34:46,337 --> 00:34:48,236
That would be cool.
763
00:34:48,238 --> 00:34:50,236
[man 2] These shoes
are fucking killing me.
764
00:34:50,238 --> 00:34:52,170
[man 3] What was the name
of that cheese that I liked?
765
00:34:52,172 --> 00:34:53,969
[man 4] Michael Keaton
was the best Batman.
766
00:34:53,971 --> 00:34:56,969
[man 5] Yes, bitch,
I look good in this hat. I know.
767
00:34:56,971 --> 00:34:58,903
[man 6] That's water
on my pants, not pee.
768
00:34:58,905 --> 00:35:00,869
[man 7] Is it "croyssant"
or "croissant"? Oh!
769
00:35:00,871 --> 00:35:03,137
[man 8] Nothing wrong with being a
virgin, no matter what my mom says.
770
00:35:03,139 --> 00:35:05,104
[man 9] French people are so cool.
[man 10] Did I let the dog out?
771
00:35:05,106 --> 00:35:07,305
[man 11] I wish I'd fucked a
black broad before I got married.
772
00:35:07,805 --> 00:35:10,039
Hello, Oprah!
773
00:35:11,806 --> 00:35:14,139
No! No! No! No!
774
00:35:17,572 --> 00:35:19,970
[Brandon] Would you stop running?
It's cobblestone!
775
00:35:19,972 --> 00:35:21,270
Shut up, just shut up!
776
00:35:21,272 --> 00:35:23,204
Good morning, Ms. Davis.
Good morning.
777
00:35:23,206 --> 00:35:26,603
This whole wearing ladies'
underwear thing is fantastic.
778
00:35:26,605 --> 00:35:27,972
Who knew?
779
00:35:29,074 --> 00:35:31,304
Ali, can you hear other people?
780
00:35:31,306 --> 00:35:35,337
Key to signing Matt Ryan: befriending
his wife through mutual friends at BC.
781
00:35:35,339 --> 00:35:38,005
What are the odds that
we sponsor the same charity?
782
00:35:38,007 --> 00:35:39,807
She vouches for me,
boom, I'm in.
783
00:35:40,074 --> 00:35:43,472
Shit, man, that's some next-level
ass-kissing right there. Respect!
784
00:35:43,474 --> 00:35:45,638
[Ethan] How does this douche
have a nicer watch than me?
785
00:35:45,640 --> 00:35:47,272
Got to be family money.
786
00:35:47,274 --> 00:35:49,873
Shit, I hope no one figures out
that this Rolex is a fake.
787
00:35:50,507 --> 00:35:52,272
What up, Ali D?
Gentlemen.
788
00:35:52,274 --> 00:35:55,039
[Eddie] Ugh! I hate my voice.
I hate my nose. I hate my chin.
789
00:35:55,041 --> 00:35:56,874
I suck, I suck, I suck!
[Ali groans quietly]
790
00:35:57,207 --> 00:36:00,338
[man 1] Pretend I'm working,
pretend I'm working, pretend I'm working.
791
00:36:00,340 --> 00:36:02,571
[man 2] I'm pretty sure
I still reek of tequila.
792
00:36:02,573 --> 00:36:03,672
No more day drinking.
Good morning.
793
00:36:03,674 --> 00:36:05,340
Look straight ahead.
794
00:36:05,707 --> 00:36:06,872
[man 3]
God, these piercings hurt.
795
00:36:06,874 --> 00:36:08,272
God, these piercings hurt!
796
00:36:08,274 --> 00:36:10,272
[man 4] Come on,
anal isn't cheating.
797
00:36:10,274 --> 00:36:12,039
[man 5] I wonder if it's too late
to become a marine biologist.
798
00:36:12,041 --> 00:36:13,572
[man 6] I don't think
this deodorant is working.
799
00:36:13,574 --> 00:36:14,806
What? The Jets?
800
00:36:14,808 --> 00:36:16,107
Are you fucking kidding me?
801
00:36:16,109 --> 00:36:18,107
Are you fucking
kidding me?
802
00:36:18,109 --> 00:36:19,574
See, this is why Dad left.
803
00:36:19,874 --> 00:36:21,705
This is exactly why Dad left
because of shit like this.
804
00:36:21,707 --> 00:36:22,975
Oh, hey, you two.
805
00:36:23,408 --> 00:36:28,208
Ooh, I'd pay $10,000
to see those nipples. Plus tax.
806
00:36:29,009 --> 00:36:30,241
[mouthing]
807
00:36:35,042 --> 00:36:36,973
No, this is not happening.
This is not...
808
00:36:36,975 --> 00:36:39,040
Oh, my God, please make it stop!
809
00:36:39,042 --> 00:36:41,174
- Oh, God, you walk fast in those heels.
- Please, God, make it stop.
810
00:36:41,176 --> 00:36:43,974
Is this thing still on?
Testing, testing.
811
00:36:43,976 --> 00:36:46,407
I enjoy apple slices
with cinnamon.
812
00:36:46,409 --> 00:36:49,207
Okay, your snack choices
do not interest me right now!
813
00:36:49,209 --> 00:36:52,340
Oh, I'm so scared. I need help!
Can't you see that?
814
00:36:52,342 --> 00:36:54,307
Help me! Help me!
815
00:36:54,309 --> 00:36:56,240
Help me! Okay, I'm helping!
I'm helping.
816
00:36:56,242 --> 00:36:59,174
I am booking us a psychiatrist
with side-by-side couches.
817
00:36:59,176 --> 00:37:01,808
No, no, no! No more doctors!
I can't handle doctors!
818
00:37:01,810 --> 00:37:03,841
I'm in the middle of too much
work shit for this!
819
00:37:03,843 --> 00:37:05,475
I can't handle this! I can't...
820
00:37:05,477 --> 00:37:10,042
Oh, my God. I'm so hot.
I'm so hot. Oh, my God.
821
00:37:10,044 --> 00:37:12,542
I'm getting hot! I'm hot!
822
00:37:12,544 --> 00:37:14,809
Do something.
Okay, okay, okay!
823
00:37:14,811 --> 00:37:16,574
You know
what's weird about this?
824
00:37:16,576 --> 00:37:18,942
When people hear voices,
it's usually God or Satan,
825
00:37:18,944 --> 00:37:20,308
not their assistant.
826
00:37:20,310 --> 00:37:23,243
Okay, wait.
Let me see something. Move!
827
00:37:25,078 --> 00:37:27,209
[man 1] Yo, I want some sushi.
But it's Monday.
828
00:37:27,211 --> 00:37:29,276
[man 2] How many pees a day is too many?
I gotta get my prostate checked.
829
00:37:29,278 --> 00:37:31,009
[man 3] I am not
going back to naked yoga.
830
00:37:31,011 --> 00:37:32,909
[man 4] Another pair of sneakers?
What the fuck?
831
00:37:32,911 --> 00:37:35,077
- [man 5] Did I leave the back door open?
- [man 6] Tinder or Grindr?
832
00:37:35,079 --> 00:37:37,010
[man 7]
Junk, junk, junk in the trunk.
833
00:37:37,012 --> 00:37:38,642
[man 8] Damn! How the hell
did she get pregnant?
834
00:37:38,644 --> 00:37:40,242
I pulled out twice.
Oh, my God!
835
00:37:40,244 --> 00:37:43,743
Okay, so apparently
I only hear men's voices.
836
00:37:43,745 --> 00:37:45,609
And yours. [whimpers]
837
00:37:45,611 --> 00:37:48,142
Okay. Ouch.
Wait, wait, wait.
838
00:37:48,144 --> 00:37:50,109
Walk me through last night...
the bachelorette party.
839
00:37:50,111 --> 00:37:52,943
Did... Did you gals get into
any controlled substances?
840
00:37:52,945 --> 00:37:55,077
Weed? X? Coke? Ayahuasca?
Meth? A little. No.
841
00:37:55,079 --> 00:37:57,210
LSD? Fentanyl? Bath salt? No!
842
00:37:57,212 --> 00:37:59,709
- Are you in a K hole?
- [gasps]
843
00:37:59,711 --> 00:38:00,844
Wait.
844
00:38:00,846 --> 00:38:02,576
There was this psychic. Sister.
845
00:38:02,578 --> 00:38:04,177
Yes! Yes! Sister!
846
00:38:04,179 --> 00:38:06,644
And she was supposed to help me
understand men better.
847
00:38:06,646 --> 00:38:09,243
She gave me this tea, this tea,
and she made me drink it.
848
00:38:09,245 --> 00:38:11,610
And it was nasty.
It tasted like dirt.
849
00:38:11,612 --> 00:38:13,944
- And you drank it?
- She said to!
850
00:38:13,946 --> 00:38:15,911
I thought black people stopped
drinking tea after Get Out.
851
00:38:15,913 --> 00:38:17,644
[sighs]
You forgot to stay woke.
852
00:38:17,646 --> 00:38:19,777
Shut up! We need to see Sister.
853
00:38:19,779 --> 00:38:23,014
[upbeat music playing]
854
00:38:28,579 --> 00:38:29,480
Um, that's it.
855
00:38:30,146 --> 00:38:32,280
"Hot Chocolate
Hair Designers"?
856
00:38:33,046 --> 00:38:35,678
Yeah.
You drank tea from this place?
857
00:38:35,680 --> 00:38:38,412
Hey, don't judge me.
Okay.
858
00:38:38,414 --> 00:38:40,111
[Ali] Just pull it together
and act normal.
859
00:38:40,113 --> 00:38:44,212
Yeah, girl.
She bleached all his clothes.
860
00:38:44,214 --> 00:38:45,979
I know, I was looking
outside my window. I...
861
00:38:45,981 --> 00:38:50,580
Mm-hmm. I woulda did the same thing.
Yeah. Mm-hmm.
862
00:38:54,681 --> 00:38:57,245
Hi, ladies. Excuse me.
863
00:38:57,247 --> 00:39:00,012
I'm looking for a psychic
by the name of Sister.
864
00:39:00,014 --> 00:39:02,181
Um, I heard she works here.
865
00:39:04,181 --> 00:39:07,547
Hey, Sister!
You got customers.
866
00:39:07,549 --> 00:39:09,280
[Sister]
Well, send 'em on back.
867
00:39:09,282 --> 00:39:10,579
Through that curtain.
868
00:39:10,581 --> 00:39:12,849
[Sister singing]
869
00:39:14,549 --> 00:39:17,280
Come on! [Sister] ♪ Dance with
me, dance with me ♪
870
00:39:17,282 --> 00:39:21,213
♪ And romance with me
Romance with me ♪
871
00:39:21,215 --> 00:39:28,180
♪ Oh, baby
Don't you see me crying? ♪
872
00:39:28,182 --> 00:39:33,281
♪ I'll do you right, right
Baby tonight ♪
873
00:39:33,283 --> 00:39:34,481
Hi.
Hi.
874
00:39:34,483 --> 00:39:36,347
You looking for indica
or sativa?
875
00:39:36,349 --> 00:39:40,314
Look, I got this hybrid
called Gorilla Glue.
876
00:39:40,316 --> 00:39:45,917
Baby, it'll take you up and
then lay you back down to chill.
877
00:39:46,450 --> 00:39:48,347
I'm not here to buy weed.
878
00:39:48,349 --> 00:39:51,282
I actually need psychic advice,
please.
879
00:39:51,284 --> 00:39:52,948
I was just kidding.
880
00:39:52,950 --> 00:39:54,049
Oh.
881
00:39:54,350 --> 00:39:56,980
We all know weed is illegal
in the state of Georgia.
882
00:39:56,982 --> 00:39:59,515
- Okay.
- For the moment. [chuckles]
883
00:39:59,517 --> 00:40:03,549
You can sit over there.
I can... just get a quick wash.
884
00:40:03,551 --> 00:40:04,716
So...
885
00:40:06,918 --> 00:40:09,250
what can I do for you, baby?
886
00:40:10,552 --> 00:40:15,048
You did a... a tarot reading at my
friend Mari's bachelorette night.
887
00:40:15,050 --> 00:40:16,948
Mm-hmm.
And you made me drink
888
00:40:16,950 --> 00:40:19,183
- this really funky tea.
- Mm.
889
00:40:19,185 --> 00:40:22,550
And, um, it messed me up.
So, what was in it?
890
00:40:22,552 --> 00:40:24,351
Oh, that was just jasmine tea.
891
00:40:25,251 --> 00:40:28,051
- [Ali] Oh.
- And a teeny bit of pot.
892
00:40:29,518 --> 00:40:33,083
And a teeny, tiny bit of... X.
893
00:40:33,085 --> 00:40:35,383
- What?
- FYI, you signed a waiver.
894
00:40:35,385 --> 00:40:39,517
- So you dosed me?
- No, no, no. See, people... People like it.
895
00:40:39,519 --> 00:40:42,716
People enjoy this, generally.
But what do you want me to do?
896
00:40:42,718 --> 00:40:43,850
Some dry cleaning?
Mm-mm.
897
00:40:43,852 --> 00:40:45,284
Did she... Did you shit yourself?
898
00:40:45,286 --> 00:40:47,850
- No. No. No.
- Did she shit herself?
899
00:40:47,852 --> 00:40:49,983
- No! No.
- Oh.
900
00:40:49,985 --> 00:40:51,618
Okay, so... [chuckles]
901
00:40:51,919 --> 00:40:54,917
- This tea with ecstasy...
- Okay.
902
00:40:54,919 --> 00:40:58,319
...um, gave me psychic powers.
903
00:40:58,853 --> 00:41:00,284
And...
Mm-hmm.
904
00:41:00,286 --> 00:41:01,818
...now, I know
you said you wanted
905
00:41:01,820 --> 00:41:03,751
to help me
understand men better,
906
00:41:03,753 --> 00:41:08,185
but now... Now I can literally
hear people's inner thoughts.
907
00:41:08,187 --> 00:41:10,883
So, you can hear
what I'm thinking right now?
908
00:41:10,885 --> 00:41:14,087
No. Not you, just...
just men.
909
00:41:15,353 --> 00:41:16,651
It's true.
910
00:41:16,653 --> 00:41:19,120
And it's driving me nuts.
Please help.
911
00:41:20,287 --> 00:41:22,151
Amazing. Amazing!
912
00:41:22,153 --> 00:41:25,419
No, it's not.
Yes, it is! That's amazing!
913
00:41:25,421 --> 00:41:27,151
This is the most amazing thing.
914
00:41:27,153 --> 00:41:29,286
You know, the website said...
Website?
915
00:41:29,288 --> 00:41:32,319
...that this new tea from Haiti
was coldblooded.
916
00:41:32,321 --> 00:41:33,553
It said it was the shit.
917
00:41:33,555 --> 00:41:35,188
But this!
918
00:41:36,754 --> 00:41:39,186
This is a psychic phenomenon.
919
00:41:39,188 --> 00:41:41,288
- No, it's not.
- Look...
920
00:41:41,987 --> 00:41:43,453
you got the shine now.
921
00:41:43,455 --> 00:41:45,619
I don't want the shine.
That doesn't sound good.
922
00:41:45,621 --> 00:41:47,119
Yeah, you got the shine.
You got it.
923
00:41:47,121 --> 00:41:49,653
So, what do you think
I'm supposed to do about it?
924
00:41:49,655 --> 00:41:51,619
Well... look.
925
00:41:51,621 --> 00:41:54,387
I know I always said, you
know, "What is he thinking?"
926
00:41:54,389 --> 00:41:55,520
And now I know.
927
00:41:55,522 --> 00:41:56,554
And you don't want to know
928
00:41:56,556 --> 00:41:57,554
because it's not good.
929
00:41:57,556 --> 00:41:59,387
Okay, just please...
930
00:41:59,389 --> 00:42:01,055
get the men out of my head.
931
00:42:01,322 --> 00:42:06,554
So, you're telling me that you came
in here to get rid of this ability?
932
00:42:06,556 --> 00:42:08,487
- Yes.
- Are you crazy?
933
00:42:08,489 --> 00:42:10,654
No. Do you know
how many men I work with?
934
00:42:10,656 --> 00:42:13,420
Honey, relax. Breathe.
935
00:42:13,422 --> 00:42:14,986
Listen, come here.
What?
936
00:42:14,988 --> 00:42:16,853
Come, come, come on.
That's a lot of rocks.
937
00:42:16,855 --> 00:42:18,153
Thank you. Come here, let me...
938
00:42:18,155 --> 00:42:19,920
Those are nice.
Thank you, thank you.
939
00:42:19,922 --> 00:42:22,587
- Okay. Oh, God.
- Now, listen. Just calm down.
940
00:42:22,589 --> 00:42:23,654
You feel that?
Yeah.
941
00:42:23,656 --> 00:42:25,154
You feel that?
Oh, yeah.
942
00:42:25,156 --> 00:42:26,720
You feel it? Okay. Listen...
I do. I actually do.
943
00:42:26,722 --> 00:42:28,188
I feel that.
Good. Calm down.
944
00:42:28,190 --> 00:42:31,021
Okay.
Now, weren't you the one...
945
00:42:31,023 --> 00:42:32,455
Mm.
946
00:42:32,457 --> 00:42:36,054
...complaining about men
holding you down at the job?
947
00:42:36,056 --> 00:42:38,154
Yeah. That was me.
Yeah, that was you.
948
00:42:38,156 --> 00:42:39,887
Yeah, that was good.
That was you. Uh-huh.
949
00:42:39,889 --> 00:42:41,788
Yeah, right there. Mm.
Right here? Okay.
950
00:42:41,790 --> 00:42:44,856
Now, if you can read
their thoughts...
951
00:42:45,789 --> 00:42:47,422
how they gonna do that?
952
00:42:47,424 --> 00:42:50,357
[distant tribal chanting]
953
00:42:56,157 --> 00:42:58,091
You could get inside
Joe Dolla's head.
954
00:42:58,724 --> 00:43:01,089
Or Jamal's.
You're right.
955
00:43:01,091 --> 00:43:03,990
And I can
sign the hell out of him.
956
00:43:04,559 --> 00:43:06,622
There you go.
You know what?
957
00:43:06,624 --> 00:43:08,689
I think I'm gonna hold on
to this gift after all.
958
00:43:08,691 --> 00:43:09,788
Thank you, Sister.
959
00:43:09,790 --> 00:43:12,058
["Super Bad" playing]
960
00:43:14,292 --> 00:43:16,356
- See you later.
- Kevin, my man.
961
00:43:16,358 --> 00:43:19,789
Do we have any meetings on the
books for Joe Dolla and Jamal yet?
962
00:43:19,791 --> 00:43:22,023
Nothing yet,
but we are working on it.
963
00:43:22,025 --> 00:43:24,925
Just poker at Nick's house
tonight, and you're not invited.
964
00:43:26,125 --> 00:43:28,158
[song continues]
965
00:43:30,560 --> 00:43:32,725
[Ali] Joe Dolla, here I come.
966
00:43:39,493 --> 00:43:42,391
Okay, gentlemen... [chuckles]
967
00:43:42,393 --> 00:43:46,491
I am going to climb
into your minds
968
00:43:46,493 --> 00:43:48,226
and empty your wallets.
969
00:43:51,259 --> 00:43:54,792
[doorbell rings]
970
00:43:58,026 --> 00:43:59,258
Hey!
971
00:43:59,260 --> 00:44:01,824
- Ali! What's up?
- Hi.
972
00:44:01,826 --> 00:44:03,358
You here
to drop off paperwork?
973
00:44:03,360 --> 00:44:05,092
What the fuck
are you doing here?
974
00:44:05,094 --> 00:44:07,561
No, I am here
for secret poker night.
975
00:44:08,127 --> 00:44:09,724
Thanks for inviting me finally.
976
00:44:09,726 --> 00:44:11,692
Hey, I brought a gift.
It's not a secret.
977
00:44:11,694 --> 00:44:13,958
But super glad
you've been invited... finally.
978
00:44:13,960 --> 00:44:16,292
- Me, too.
- Huh? I invited you? That's...
979
00:44:16,294 --> 00:44:18,158
No, I invited you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
980
00:44:18,160 --> 00:44:21,594
["Bills, Bills, Bills" playing]
981
00:44:29,661 --> 00:44:33,594
[Mark] Pair of sevens? Fuck it.
I'm bluffing these fools.
982
00:44:34,661 --> 00:44:37,393
[Grant] This is literally
the worst hand ever dealt
983
00:44:37,395 --> 00:44:38,529
in the history of poker.
984
00:44:39,328 --> 00:44:42,028
[Shaquille]
Three fives, come to papa.
985
00:44:43,961 --> 00:44:45,926
Grant lost some weight.
986
00:44:45,928 --> 00:44:48,294
- [Joe] Bet's to you, Miss Win-Win.
- Ah.
987
00:44:48,296 --> 00:44:51,628
It's just Miss Win tonight,
but I'm in.
988
00:44:52,463 --> 00:44:53,527
Two thou.
989
00:44:53,529 --> 00:44:55,362
[Ethan] And that's a no.
990
00:44:57,929 --> 00:45:01,127
[Joe] I smell toast.
Am I having a stroke?
991
00:45:01,129 --> 00:45:04,394
Wait, I have toast in my pocket.
[sighs]
992
00:45:04,396 --> 00:45:05,829
Okay...
993
00:45:06,962 --> 00:45:09,795
[Mark] Gotta stop playing poker
with poor people.
994
00:45:10,829 --> 00:45:13,330
[song continues]
995
00:45:14,263 --> 00:45:16,994
[Grant] Shit,
I'm missing Real Housewives.
996
00:45:16,996 --> 00:45:18,130
[Shaquille] Nothing.
997
00:45:20,695 --> 00:45:22,230
[Mark] I'm so rich.
998
00:45:23,996 --> 00:45:27,363
[Joe] I'm gonna freeze my sperm
and have baby ice cubes.
999
00:45:28,863 --> 00:45:30,627
[Eddie] Ooh, Yahtzee!
1000
00:45:30,629 --> 00:45:32,961
[Kevin] All right. Two kings.
Let's look for number three.
1001
00:45:32,963 --> 00:45:34,727
[Grant] You can't win this hand.
1002
00:45:34,729 --> 00:45:36,794
[Eddie] Played tight.
It's time to make a push.
1003
00:45:36,796 --> 00:45:38,429
[Joe] Two hearts? Yes!
1004
00:45:38,431 --> 00:45:41,129
- [Ethan] Seriously?
- [Mark] Aw, shit.
1005
00:45:41,131 --> 00:45:43,829
[Shaquille] Great pot odds,
with two streets to come.
1006
00:45:43,831 --> 00:45:45,727
- [Mark] King of diamonds.
- [Kevin] Nine, five, offsuit.
1007
00:45:45,729 --> 00:45:47,129
What am I supposed to do
with this?
1008
00:45:47,131 --> 00:45:48,831
[Eddie] Never win shit here.
1009
00:45:50,864 --> 00:45:53,730
[Joe]
She got balls. Big lady balls.
1010
00:45:55,365 --> 00:45:57,330
Young lady...
1011
00:45:57,332 --> 00:46:00,230
I see how you winning all these
games and stuff, you know?
1012
00:46:00,232 --> 00:46:02,962
And I know there's something
going on, you dig? [laughs]
1013
00:46:02,964 --> 00:46:05,963
It's a numerical anomaly,
that's what it is.
1014
00:46:05,965 --> 00:46:10,263
No, Joe. I'm just really good
at reading people.
1015
00:46:10,265 --> 00:46:11,299
Like you.
1016
00:46:11,932 --> 00:46:13,696
[Grant] Aw, shit.
1017
00:46:13,698 --> 00:46:15,565
[Mark] What's happening?
1018
00:46:15,567 --> 00:46:19,896
[laughs] Like me! That's what she said.
She said like me.
1019
00:46:19,898 --> 00:46:21,896
Like me
is a valuable skill, girl.
1020
00:46:21,898 --> 00:46:24,231
Uh, it's like being able
to start a fire in the woods.
1021
00:46:24,233 --> 00:46:26,763
[Joe] I should really learn how
to start a fire in the woods.
1022
00:46:26,765 --> 00:46:29,298
Then again,
when am I ever in the woods?
1023
00:46:29,300 --> 00:46:32,131
Squirrels are terrifying.
And frogs.
1024
00:46:32,133 --> 00:46:34,431
I'll raise you another three.
1025
00:46:34,433 --> 00:46:38,597
[Shaquille] Statistically,
I've got 12 outs with two streets to come.
1026
00:46:38,599 --> 00:46:40,233
The pretzels are delicious.
1027
00:46:41,433 --> 00:46:44,730
I feel the heat
coming off those cards. I'm out.
1028
00:46:44,732 --> 00:46:46,730
[Ali laughs]
1029
00:46:46,732 --> 00:46:49,267
[song continues]
1030
00:46:54,599 --> 00:46:56,965
[Nick] Damn! I got to cut one.
1031
00:46:56,967 --> 00:46:58,798
It's that egg salad.
1032
00:46:58,800 --> 00:47:00,800
I'll sneak it out with a cough.
1033
00:47:01,434 --> 00:47:03,234
[coughs]
1034
00:47:03,900 --> 00:47:05,299
[Joe] Ew!
[Eddie] What the fuck?
1035
00:47:05,301 --> 00:47:08,134
[Grant] Ugh!
[Mark] Just... just wow.
1036
00:47:08,834 --> 00:47:10,433
[Eddie] Ugh, is that egg salad?
1037
00:47:10,435 --> 00:47:12,300
Damn! Could we open up a window?
1038
00:47:12,302 --> 00:47:14,700
Whoever did that
needs to go see a doctor.
1039
00:47:17,368 --> 00:47:21,566
[Joe] Seven, deuce, offsuit.
Who dealt this shit-ass hand?
1040
00:47:21,568 --> 00:47:23,698
Oh, damn it! I did.
1041
00:47:23,700 --> 00:47:25,833
Fuck it.
I'm gonna take my stand here.
1042
00:47:25,835 --> 00:47:28,601
I'll raise you two thousand.
1043
00:47:31,202 --> 00:47:34,266
[Nick] For the love of God, Ali,
don't take all of Joe Dolla's money.
1044
00:47:34,268 --> 00:47:36,868
Let the greedy motherfucker
win.
1045
00:47:37,901 --> 00:47:39,866
[Joe]
I kinda like this crazy woman.
1046
00:47:39,868 --> 00:47:42,267
Well, it's just me and you,
Joe Dolla.
1047
00:47:42,269 --> 00:47:45,403
- Alpha Dog vs. Mama Bear!
- [growls]
1048
00:47:46,369 --> 00:47:48,800
[Joe]
Is this crazy lady bluffing?
1049
00:47:48,802 --> 00:47:50,767
I got to bluff the bluffer.
1050
00:47:50,769 --> 00:47:52,369
Make her the bluffee.
1051
00:47:52,902 --> 00:47:54,367
I'm all in.
1052
00:47:54,369 --> 00:47:56,167
I ain't playing
no more games with you.
1053
00:47:56,169 --> 00:47:57,334
I'm all in.
1054
00:47:57,336 --> 00:47:58,769
I'm all in.
1055
00:47:59,570 --> 00:48:02,204
What you got?
[laughs nervously]
1056
00:48:15,204 --> 00:48:16,636
[laughs]
1057
00:48:18,970 --> 00:48:20,037
Hm.
1058
00:48:20,870 --> 00:48:22,403
Well-played, Dolla.
[Joe squeals]
1059
00:48:22,405 --> 00:48:24,571
[stifling laughter]
1060
00:48:25,537 --> 00:48:28,436
[Joe] Oh, a little bit of pee came out.
[laughs]
1061
00:48:28,438 --> 00:48:31,734
I tell you, this woman's a charm.
She's my good luck charm.
1062
00:48:31,736 --> 00:48:34,036
She coming
to the meeting tomorrow, Nick?
1063
00:48:34,038 --> 00:48:36,336
You got it, Joe.
Anything you say.
1064
00:48:36,338 --> 00:48:39,103
Wouldn't be a meeting
without her. Right, Ali?
1065
00:48:39,105 --> 00:48:40,969
I wouldn't miss it
for the world. [laughs]
1066
00:48:40,971 --> 00:48:43,103
[Joe] That's right, girl,
you better not. You hear me?
1067
00:48:43,105 --> 00:48:45,371
[Ethan] What the fuck just happened?
[Joe laughs]
1068
00:48:45,938 --> 00:48:47,138
It's a good-looking pot.
1069
00:48:48,438 --> 00:48:50,004
[elevator bell dings]
1070
00:48:56,771 --> 00:48:58,406
Damn, she's fine.
1071
00:48:59,306 --> 00:49:01,637
She smells like cigar smoke
and whiskey.
1072
00:49:02,172 --> 00:49:03,604
So sexy. Mm!
1073
00:49:04,505 --> 00:49:06,872
Shame she's with
that skinny white guy.
1074
00:49:07,539 --> 00:49:08,905
How did he get her?
1075
00:49:09,473 --> 00:49:11,137
He's gay. [coughs]
1076
00:49:11,139 --> 00:49:13,537
[clears throat]
Gay. He's gay.
1077
00:49:13,539 --> 00:49:15,340
I'm sorry, what?
1078
00:49:15,605 --> 00:49:19,837
Oh, I thought you said something
about the guy that's always with me.
1079
00:49:19,839 --> 00:49:21,571
He's my assistant.
1080
00:49:21,573 --> 00:49:23,973
He's gay. He's my gay assistant.
1081
00:49:25,240 --> 00:49:26,240
Cool.
1082
00:49:27,773 --> 00:49:29,406
Wonder if I should ask her out.
1083
00:49:30,340 --> 00:49:32,373
Why can't it ever be the woman
who makes the move?
1084
00:49:33,673 --> 00:49:37,472
I wish she would just slam me against
these elevator doors and kiss me.
1085
00:49:37,474 --> 00:49:39,105
["Free Your Mind" playing]
1086
00:49:39,107 --> 00:49:40,140
Excuse me?
1087
00:49:40,973 --> 00:49:42,906
- What are you doing?
- This.
1088
00:49:57,807 --> 00:50:00,141
[moaning, grunting]
1089
00:50:05,242 --> 00:50:06,974
[song continues]
1090
00:50:07,508 --> 00:50:09,275
[Ali] Whoo!
1091
00:50:11,841 --> 00:50:13,240
Let's take it upstairs to the loft.
Ooh!
1092
00:50:13,242 --> 00:50:15,140
It's sexier than the bedroom.
Okay.
1093
00:50:15,142 --> 00:50:17,706
Wait, let me freshen up
a little bit.
1094
00:50:17,708 --> 00:50:18,906
Bathroom's right there.
Okay.
1095
00:50:18,908 --> 00:50:20,773
And take your time, okay?
Okay.
1096
00:50:20,775 --> 00:50:22,574
I got to say, it was spooky
how you read my mind.
1097
00:50:22,576 --> 00:50:25,140
That was the hottest shit ever.
1098
00:50:25,142 --> 00:50:26,207
Mm, mm.
1099
00:50:26,209 --> 00:50:27,673
Go get ready, go get ready.
1100
00:50:27,675 --> 00:50:29,409
Let me see you walk away.
1101
00:50:29,942 --> 00:50:31,040
I'm gonna get so ready.
1102
00:50:31,042 --> 00:50:32,574
Whoo!
Oh, shit! Oh, damn!
1103
00:50:32,576 --> 00:50:34,041
She could be the one!
1104
00:50:34,043 --> 00:50:38,074
Oh, shit! You into
that African freaky shit.
1105
00:50:38,076 --> 00:50:40,674
♪ Ooh, I've been waiting, Lord ♪
1106
00:50:40,676 --> 00:50:42,742
[song continues]
1107
00:51:08,343 --> 00:51:09,374
[song ends]
1108
00:51:09,376 --> 00:51:10,708
[monastic chanting]
1109
00:51:10,710 --> 00:51:13,409
Oh. What kind of music is that?
[laughs]
1110
00:51:13,411 --> 00:51:18,008
Mm, I really love your artwork.
You're very cultured.
1111
00:51:18,010 --> 00:51:20,143
Are you ready? Here I come.
1112
00:51:20,145 --> 00:51:23,377
Why are you so quiet? [laughs]
1113
00:51:24,544 --> 00:51:26,011
[gasps]
1114
00:51:26,911 --> 00:51:28,809
Before we begin,
we should agree on a safe word.
1115
00:51:28,811 --> 00:51:30,542
- What the fuck?
- No, no.
1116
00:51:30,544 --> 00:51:32,476
"What the fuck" won't work.
Something more specific.
1117
00:51:32,478 --> 00:51:34,809
Yeah, you know what?
I think I left my kid in the back seat.
1118
00:51:34,811 --> 00:51:36,009
But you stay right there.
1119
00:51:36,011 --> 00:51:37,876
Hey! Come on!
[Ali] No, no, no!
1120
00:51:37,878 --> 00:51:40,076
[Captain Fucktastic] I thought
you were the real deal!
1121
00:51:40,078 --> 00:51:43,310
Jamal Barry.
Now, you are the real deal.
1122
00:51:43,312 --> 00:51:46,477
And on behalf of
the entire Summit team,
1123
00:51:46,479 --> 00:51:51,276
I want to thank you for taking your
time to hear our presentation today.
1124
00:51:51,278 --> 00:51:54,376
All right, so I'ma bounce pass
this over to my man Kevin Myrtle.
1125
00:51:54,378 --> 00:51:56,010
And he'll take it from here.
1126
00:51:56,012 --> 00:51:58,177
- You're in good hands.
- Okay, take it away.
1127
00:51:58,179 --> 00:52:00,810
This agency represents the
biggest athletes in the world,
1128
00:52:00,812 --> 00:52:04,211
but we here believe
that you can surpass them all
1129
00:52:04,213 --> 00:52:08,077
with your skills,
your confidence, your charisma.
1130
00:52:08,079 --> 00:52:09,578
We see you
1131
00:52:09,580 --> 00:52:13,145
as the athlete that every kid
is gonna want to grow up to be.
1132
00:52:13,147 --> 00:52:14,978
Now, this is just
a little teaser
1133
00:52:14,980 --> 00:52:18,178
of the coming attractions
for Jamal Barry's future.
1134
00:52:18,180 --> 00:52:19,878
[sirens wailing,
hip-hop music playing on video]
1135
00:52:19,880 --> 00:52:21,545
[man rapping] ♪ No cap, no cap ♪
1136
00:52:21,547 --> 00:52:23,377
♪ I see you motherfuckers
Wanna talk ♪
1137
00:52:23,379 --> 00:52:25,445
♪ About Jamal this
And Jamal that ♪
1138
00:52:25,447 --> 00:52:27,277
♪ But we balls to the wall
Motherfucker! ♪
1139
00:52:27,279 --> 00:52:29,945
♪ Y'all like small balls
I'm that big dog ♪
1140
00:52:29,947 --> 00:52:32,278
♪ I'm like Shaq D on Adderall
That's how I ball ♪
1141
00:52:32,280 --> 00:52:33,845
♪ See that private jet
That model chick ♪
1142
00:52:33,847 --> 00:52:35,545
♪ That's how I ball ♪
1143
00:52:35,547 --> 00:52:36,946
♪ See, she like it raw
She like it raw ♪
1144
00:52:36,948 --> 00:52:39,179
♪ That's how I ball ♪
1145
00:52:39,181 --> 00:52:41,345
♪ They try to put the head
On my salary I still ball ♪
1146
00:52:41,347 --> 00:52:43,146
♪ Respect the name Jamal
I come from Joe Barry's balls ♪
1147
00:52:43,148 --> 00:52:44,679
♪ If we can't talk at all ♪
1148
00:52:44,681 --> 00:52:46,179
♪ Then we can't talk at all ♪
1149
00:52:46,181 --> 00:52:48,614
♪ How I ball
How I ball ♪
1150
00:52:51,647 --> 00:52:53,146
♪ How I ball ♪
1151
00:52:53,148 --> 00:52:55,213
♪ And can't nobody ball
Like Jamal ♪
1152
00:52:55,215 --> 00:52:57,215
♪ And bitches love balls ♪
1153
00:52:58,116 --> 00:53:00,215
♪ Especially Jamal's balls ♪
[woman moans]
1154
00:53:01,281 --> 00:53:04,379
♪ No cap, there's no cap
Yeah, there's no cap ♪
1155
00:53:04,381 --> 00:53:05,681
Okay...
1156
00:53:06,181 --> 00:53:08,849
♪ Yeah, there's no cap
Yeah, there's no cap ♪
1157
00:53:10,882 --> 00:53:12,682
[Nick laughs]
1158
00:53:14,049 --> 00:53:16,314
- [Ethan] Nice.
- [laughter, clapping]
1159
00:53:16,316 --> 00:53:17,648
[man] Whoo!
1160
00:53:21,815 --> 00:53:23,748
[Nick] Baller video, Kev.
1161
00:53:24,516 --> 00:53:26,314
Now, look, I...
1162
00:53:26,316 --> 00:53:28,780
That is a rough edit of, you
know, what we're feeling here.
1163
00:53:28,782 --> 00:53:33,147
[Joe] Ten percent for this reject
'90s Diddy video? Hell, no!
1164
00:53:33,149 --> 00:53:34,848
[Jamal] Man, get me out of here.
1165
00:53:34,850 --> 00:53:37,081
I just want to play some pickup
at Wabash Park.
1166
00:53:37,083 --> 00:53:40,415
Oh, please, please,
gentlemen, please.
1167
00:53:40,417 --> 00:53:43,083
I think I know
what's on everybody's mind here.
1168
00:53:43,850 --> 00:53:45,950
[sighs]
You're not going with Summit.
1169
00:53:46,716 --> 00:53:48,148
And why should you?
1170
00:53:48,150 --> 00:53:52,181
That cheap '90s rap video
is not who you are.
1171
00:53:52,183 --> 00:53:53,484
That's right.
1172
00:53:53,851 --> 00:53:57,115
'Cause this boy's body
is a Shinto shrine, okay?
1173
00:53:57,117 --> 00:54:00,915
Every breakfast he ever has is
made with my patented smoothie.
1174
00:54:00,917 --> 00:54:03,049
[Jamal]
Oh, man, not the smoothie rant.
1175
00:54:03,051 --> 00:54:08,416
We're talking about kale, chia
seed, coconut juice, avocados.
1176
00:54:08,418 --> 00:54:11,083
You know how many avocados
is in this boy's body?
1177
00:54:11,085 --> 00:54:12,715
Look at his legs!
[chuckles]
1178
00:54:12,717 --> 00:54:15,149
On top of that,
fish oils, mega-nines,
1179
00:54:15,151 --> 00:54:16,950
sometimes fives and sixes.
1180
00:54:16,952 --> 00:54:18,682
Omega.
Depends on what I have.
1181
00:54:18,684 --> 00:54:21,149
Pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds.
1182
00:54:21,151 --> 00:54:23,983
- Some pistachios sometimes go in there.
- Okay.
1183
00:54:23,985 --> 00:54:25,850
Whatever it is...
Sounds healthy.
1184
00:54:25,852 --> 00:54:27,349
No, wait a minute!
1185
00:54:27,351 --> 00:54:30,016
I put more stuff in it.
Sometimes I add cherries.
1186
00:54:30,018 --> 00:54:32,283
A little soy sauce,
some duck sauce.
1187
00:54:32,285 --> 00:54:35,183
Okay, then I add more chia seed
on top of that!
1188
00:54:35,185 --> 00:54:37,085
I care about this here boy.
1189
00:54:37,552 --> 00:54:39,984
Okay, Joe...
1190
00:54:39,986 --> 00:54:44,450
You could hire a freelance agent
and pay only five percent,
1191
00:54:44,452 --> 00:54:47,917
but you would be missing out on what
a full-service agency has to offer.
1192
00:54:47,919 --> 00:54:50,684
Besides what, free Fiji water
and a sizzle reel?
1193
00:54:50,686 --> 00:54:54,717
Look, building a billion-dollar brand
goes beyond cutting costs. Okay?
1194
00:54:54,719 --> 00:54:58,650
It's about developing relationships
with leading sponsors.
1195
00:54:58,652 --> 00:55:01,384
Knowing who delivers
and who's all hype.
1196
00:55:01,386 --> 00:55:04,684
It's installing protections
to keep your money
1197
00:55:04,686 --> 00:55:06,684
through injuries, trades.
1198
00:55:06,686 --> 00:55:09,251
Look... It's...
[coffee pouring]
1199
00:55:09,253 --> 00:55:13,351
It's not really about
our vision for you at all.
1200
00:55:13,353 --> 00:55:16,120
It's about
what's in your mind, Jamal.
1201
00:55:17,053 --> 00:55:17,818
Right on.
1202
00:55:17,820 --> 00:55:19,452
That all sounds great,
1203
00:55:19,454 --> 00:55:21,920
but what I really could use
right now is a cup of coffee.
1204
00:55:22,887 --> 00:55:28,054
Even... if it's as simple
as a cup of coffee.
1205
00:55:32,387 --> 00:55:33,287
Damn.
1206
00:55:34,054 --> 00:55:36,752
How'd you know that?
Just doing my job.
1207
00:55:36,754 --> 00:55:39,018
Okay, now she's pissing me off.
1208
00:55:39,020 --> 00:55:40,252
What the fuck
just happened?
1209
00:55:40,254 --> 00:55:41,788
I thought
that video was awesome.
1210
00:55:43,589 --> 00:55:44,986
[Joe] You know what?
To be honest,
1211
00:55:44,988 --> 00:55:47,520
I never considered
a female agent until now.
1212
00:55:47,522 --> 00:55:50,286
Until Branch Rickey took a
chance on Jackie Robinson,
1213
00:55:50,288 --> 00:55:53,453
no one ever considered a colored
baseball player in the majors.
1214
00:55:53,455 --> 00:55:56,353
[laughs] Well,
Branch Rickey was the mahatma.
1215
00:55:56,355 --> 00:55:59,820
- Mm-hmm.
- Only white man deserving of sainthood.
1216
00:55:59,822 --> 00:56:02,186
- Abraham Lincoln, Pop.
- But he was part Eskimo.
1217
00:56:02,188 --> 00:56:03,887
Mr. Barry's car is at the valet.
1218
00:56:03,889 --> 00:56:05,353
Thank you, Brandon.
And you know what?
1219
00:56:05,355 --> 00:56:07,620
I would love to finish
this conversation.
1220
00:56:07,622 --> 00:56:09,153
How about I invite you
to the Hawks game?
1221
00:56:09,155 --> 00:56:11,053
Sunday afternoon?
We have a sky suite.
1222
00:56:11,055 --> 00:56:13,920
- [Jamal] Skybox... Fuck yes!
- Can't do it. Not gonna happen.
1223
00:56:13,922 --> 00:56:16,154
- That's family day. You understand?
- Oh.
1224
00:56:16,156 --> 00:56:18,987
Hey, Sly and the Family Stone
could be coming out of seclusion.
1225
00:56:18,989 --> 00:56:21,321
I mean, it could be an asteroid
coming towards Earth.
1226
00:56:21,323 --> 00:56:22,554
"Oh, no, no!"
1227
00:56:22,556 --> 00:56:23,955
Not gonna happen,
you understand?
1228
00:56:23,957 --> 00:56:25,521
- 'Cause we lock it down.
- [Jamal] Damn.
1229
00:56:25,523 --> 00:56:27,754
But you know something,
you wouldn't understand that,
1230
00:56:27,756 --> 00:56:29,457
'cause you're not,
like, a family woman.
1231
00:56:30,289 --> 00:56:32,422
What makes you think
I'm not a family woman?
1232
00:56:32,424 --> 00:56:33,955
Whoo, whoo, whoo!
1233
00:56:33,957 --> 00:56:36,255
No disrespect.
I mean, you doing you.
1234
00:56:36,257 --> 00:56:38,155
But this is a different set
of values right here.
1235
00:56:38,157 --> 00:56:40,055
You know,
we all about the roots.
1236
00:56:40,057 --> 00:56:42,222
- So this is about the roots, it's deep.
- Roots.
1237
00:56:42,224 --> 00:56:43,924
[Joe] I don't trust a woman
with no family.
1238
00:56:44,324 --> 00:56:47,757
Like I don't trust a man with
no eyebrows and too many keys.
1239
00:56:55,090 --> 00:56:59,458
As a matter of fact,
I will bring my family.
1240
00:56:59,891 --> 00:57:01,523
There they are, right there.
1241
00:57:01,525 --> 00:57:04,356
There, both of them, the big one
and the little. Hey, Will!
1242
00:57:04,358 --> 00:57:06,755
Hey! Hey! Will! Will!
1243
00:57:06,757 --> 00:57:08,189
Come over here.
1244
00:57:08,191 --> 00:57:10,123
- Uh, who are they?
- [laughs]
1245
00:57:10,125 --> 00:57:12,790
- This is your husband?
- Ah, the man put a ring on it.
1246
00:57:12,792 --> 00:57:15,922
Oh, yeah! Did you want me to
have your family wait upstairs?
1247
00:57:15,924 --> 00:57:17,223
[Ali]
No, I need you to roll calls.
1248
00:57:17,225 --> 00:57:19,424
- Roll calls, Brandon.
- Okay.
1249
00:57:19,426 --> 00:57:21,857
Hey! Hey.
1250
00:57:21,859 --> 00:57:23,357
- Hey.
- Hey.
1251
00:57:23,359 --> 00:57:25,491
[Will] Oh, now she's smiling?
Clearly crazy.
1252
00:57:25,493 --> 00:57:26,823
[Brandon] Who the fuck are they?
1253
00:57:26,825 --> 00:57:27,922
[clears throat]
1254
00:57:27,924 --> 00:57:30,023
Um, Will, this is Jamal Barry
1255
00:57:30,025 --> 00:57:31,823
and his dad, Joe Dolla.
1256
00:57:31,825 --> 00:57:33,090
That's Ben. [chuckles]
1257
00:57:33,092 --> 00:57:34,891
[Will] Holy shit, it is.
1258
00:57:34,893 --> 00:57:36,559
- Wassup, man?
- What's goin' on, brother?
1259
00:57:37,025 --> 00:57:38,860
Yeah, bring it on in here,
playa!
1260
00:57:39,192 --> 00:57:41,791
Right on.
That's a live one on your hands.
1261
00:57:41,793 --> 00:57:43,425
Oh, yes, I'm alive.
1262
00:57:43,427 --> 00:57:45,759
- You talking about him?
- [Ali clears throat]
1263
00:57:46,393 --> 00:57:47,791
You got me!
1264
00:57:47,793 --> 00:57:50,258
He's a funny fella.
This guy's a prankster.
1265
00:57:50,260 --> 00:57:51,327
He is.
1266
00:57:51,793 --> 00:57:53,158
[laughs] Ow.
1267
00:57:53,160 --> 00:57:55,091
I dig this here,
but you know what?
1268
00:57:55,093 --> 00:57:56,791
I'ma let y'all have
your family time.
1269
00:57:56,793 --> 00:57:58,657
Girl, you look like
you spit this little boy out.
1270
00:57:58,659 --> 00:58:00,125
"Family time"?
1271
00:58:00,127 --> 00:58:01,924
You look
just like your mother, boy.
1272
00:58:01,926 --> 00:58:03,760
[Ali] Okay, I'll talk to you later.
All right! Yes.
1273
00:58:04,127 --> 00:58:06,127
So, hey,
what are you guys doing here?
1274
00:58:06,727 --> 00:58:08,991
Go ahead, do your thing.
Show her.
1275
00:58:08,993 --> 00:58:12,958
Sorry. I found your license
on the floor in my dad's room.
1276
00:58:12,960 --> 00:58:16,493
And I'm also sorry for wearing
your underwear on my head.
1277
00:58:16,495 --> 00:58:18,860
Okay. Thank you. Um...
1278
00:58:19,061 --> 00:58:20,658
And, you know,
I should probably apologize
1279
00:58:20,660 --> 00:58:22,595
for leaving your house
in such a frenzy, I just...
1280
00:58:22,894 --> 00:58:24,927
I can be short with people
sometimes.
1281
00:58:25,328 --> 00:58:27,495
I'm sure you probably thought
I was crazy.
1282
00:58:28,027 --> 00:58:31,462
[Will] Crazy people don't think
they're crazy, so maybe she's not.
1283
00:58:32,128 --> 00:58:34,527
- Mm-hmm.
- Can you try to be nice to my dad?
1284
00:58:34,529 --> 00:58:37,260
Ever since Mom died,
Dad's been very lonely.
1285
00:58:37,262 --> 00:58:40,393
- What?
- Whoa, whoa, hey, hey. It's okay, buddy.
1286
00:58:40,395 --> 00:58:42,529
Why didn't you say that to me
in the beginning?
1287
00:58:42,761 --> 00:58:44,926
Well, I was gonna tell you
that morning,
1288
00:58:44,928 --> 00:58:47,195
but you ran out so fast, you...
1289
00:58:47,862 --> 00:58:49,494
You know, I'm...
I'm sorry about...
1290
00:58:49,496 --> 00:58:51,460
[Will] Wait,
why am I apologizing to her?
1291
00:58:51,462 --> 00:58:53,026
I didn't do nothing wrong.
1292
00:58:53,028 --> 00:58:54,694
You know what?
Why don't I make it up to both of you
1293
00:58:54,696 --> 00:58:57,960
and invite you to the Hawks
and Timberwolves game on Sunday?
1294
00:58:57,962 --> 00:58:59,294
We have a skybox.
1295
00:58:59,296 --> 00:59:02,696
[Will]
Karl-Anthony Towns? Skybox!
1296
00:59:03,130 --> 00:59:04,530
- You serious?
- Yes.
1297
00:59:04,828 --> 00:59:07,061
Well, yeah.
Yeah, that'd be nice.
1298
00:59:07,063 --> 00:59:10,063
- Okay, well, I'll see you Sunday. Great.
- All right, cool, cool.
1299
00:59:14,063 --> 00:59:15,029
[mouthing]
1300
00:59:19,063 --> 00:59:21,063
- Can I talk to you for a second?
- Mm-hmm.
1301
00:59:25,763 --> 00:59:28,362
Hey, that was supposed to be
a team presentation,
1302
00:59:28,364 --> 00:59:30,894
not some bullshit
"You go, girl" moment.
1303
00:59:30,896 --> 00:59:32,827
The only bullshit in that room
1304
00:59:32,829 --> 00:59:33,975
was that racist Lifestyleof the Rich and Clueless shit!
1305
00:59:34,064 --> 00:59:36,029
[Kevin] Ball-busting bitch!
1306
00:59:36,031 --> 00:59:37,128
[Ali chuckles]
1307
00:59:37,130 --> 00:59:38,595
Well, if Team Bro
1308
00:59:38,597 --> 00:59:40,762
would listen to a sister
every once in a while,
1309
00:59:40,764 --> 00:59:43,097
maybe I wouldn't have to be
a ball-busting bitch.
1310
00:59:43,099 --> 00:59:44,295
I did not say that.
1311
00:59:44,297 --> 00:59:45,662
[Kevin] Shit, did I?
1312
00:59:45,664 --> 00:59:47,364
If you didn't, you thought it.
1313
00:59:47,697 --> 00:59:49,765
[Kevin] Stop moving the car.
1314
00:59:51,198 --> 00:59:53,565
Stop moving the fucking car.
1315
00:59:54,099 --> 00:59:57,063
I know it was you
who voted me down from partner.
1316
00:59:57,065 --> 01:00:00,463
What? I voted to make you
partner every single time,
1317
01:00:00,465 --> 01:00:02,663
and please stop moving
the fucking car!
1318
01:00:02,665 --> 01:00:04,898
[Kevin] Maybe I shouldn't have.
You're crazy as fuck.
1319
01:00:05,264 --> 01:00:06,398
Wait.
1320
01:00:07,865 --> 01:00:09,230
You really voted for me?
1321
01:00:09,232 --> 01:00:12,163
Yes! This is a business.
I'm a numbers guy.
1322
01:00:12,165 --> 01:00:13,797
You get the numbers.
End of story.
1323
01:00:13,799 --> 01:00:16,530
All right, so if it wasn't you,
then who was it?
1324
01:00:16,532 --> 01:00:18,230
I don't know.
It could've been anyone!
1325
01:00:18,232 --> 01:00:19,897
It's not like you have
a lot of friends here.
1326
01:00:19,899 --> 01:00:21,998
You're constantly
throwing the first punch,
1327
01:00:22,000 --> 01:00:24,132
and you got you and no one else.
1328
01:00:25,899 --> 01:00:28,597
That's bullshit. [laughs]
That's bullshit.
1329
01:00:28,599 --> 01:00:31,597
Because if I were a man,
people would say I play hard.
1330
01:00:31,599 --> 01:00:34,733
[Kevin] If you were a man,
people would say that you were a dick.
1331
01:00:37,900 --> 01:00:39,397
Well, thanks for the talk.
1332
01:00:39,399 --> 01:00:42,567
It's always nice for a woman
to be called a dick.
1333
01:00:44,567 --> 01:00:45,465
Wha...
1334
01:00:45,467 --> 01:00:47,264
I did not say that.
1335
01:00:47,266 --> 01:00:50,598
[man 1] No more dating strippers
unless Fantasia calls me back.
1336
01:00:50,600 --> 01:00:52,832
[man 2] I'm getting fat.
Like, Rerun fat.
1337
01:00:52,834 --> 01:00:55,598
Hey, Ali. I heard you crushed
your Jamal Barry meeting. Nice.
1338
01:00:55,600 --> 01:00:57,298
[Danny] I'm so hot for you!
1339
01:00:57,300 --> 01:00:58,531
I wish I could
scream it out loud,
1340
01:00:58,533 --> 01:00:59,933
but no one would understand.
1341
01:00:59,935 --> 01:01:01,699
Oh, Danny, thank you.
You're so sweet.
1342
01:01:01,701 --> 01:01:03,398
[Danny] Don't think I don't see
that big-ass dick
1343
01:01:03,400 --> 01:01:05,167
trying to bust
through those pants.
1344
01:01:05,901 --> 01:01:06,835
What did you say?
1345
01:01:08,266 --> 01:01:09,701
We didn't say anything.
1346
01:01:10,068 --> 01:01:12,033
I'm gonna, uh...
go back to my desk.
1347
01:01:12,035 --> 01:01:14,234
Um, I'll see you two later.
1348
01:01:15,401 --> 01:01:17,434
[Danny]
You and me, Brandon, someday.
1349
01:01:20,036 --> 01:01:22,434
[crowd cheering]
1350
01:01:33,602 --> 01:01:37,333
So, Nick, what'd Ali mention
about five-percent commission?
1351
01:01:37,335 --> 01:01:39,367
Five-percent commission.
She's hilarious.
1352
01:01:39,369 --> 01:01:40,736
Would you excuse me a second?
1353
01:01:42,669 --> 01:01:45,134
So when is this fabulous
fake family gonna show?
1354
01:01:45,136 --> 01:01:46,634
They will be here.
1355
01:01:46,636 --> 01:01:48,970
Well, the Barry Bunch
keep asking for him.
1356
01:01:49,435 --> 01:01:52,168
- Hey.
- Hey!
1357
01:01:52,770 --> 01:01:55,200
- Hey, sorry we're late.
- I know, honey.
1358
01:01:55,202 --> 01:01:56,870
You had a rough day.
1359
01:01:57,104 --> 01:02:00,135
And you, you little... thing.
1360
01:02:01,202 --> 01:02:02,436
Go.
1361
01:02:03,203 --> 01:02:04,536
[Joe] Hey, yo, Ali!
1362
01:02:04,870 --> 01:02:08,036
I have a monumentally
important question to ask you.
1363
01:02:08,038 --> 01:02:10,201
- Okay.
- Do you trust Elon Musk?
1364
01:02:10,203 --> 01:02:12,936
'Cause that man is one white
glove and metal hand away
1365
01:02:12,938 --> 01:02:14,869
from being a James Bond villain.
1366
01:02:14,871 --> 01:02:16,334
Freaky.
1367
01:02:16,336 --> 01:02:17,602
Hey, thanks again
for inviting us, Ali.
1368
01:02:17,604 --> 01:02:19,103
- Okay, yes.
- Appreciate you.
1369
01:02:19,105 --> 01:02:20,869
- Wassup, Will?
- Wassup, Jamal?
1370
01:02:20,871 --> 01:02:22,736
- What's going on, man?
- Hey, man. You good?
1371
01:02:22,738 --> 01:02:24,869
- Yes, sir.
- Yeah, yeah, I'm... I'm... I'm good.
1372
01:02:24,871 --> 01:02:27,602
[Will] Holy shit, Jamal Barry
remembered my name!
1373
01:02:27,604 --> 01:02:29,337
[woman] That skank is a ho.
1374
01:02:29,971 --> 01:02:31,769
Ali Cat and Will of the People,
1375
01:02:31,771 --> 01:02:34,769
that is my baby girl,
my wife. Loretta!
1376
01:02:34,771 --> 01:02:37,502
I know, bitch is always talking
shit about other people.
1377
01:02:37,504 --> 01:02:40,135
Her nappy weave
is some virgin hair from Peru.
1378
01:02:40,137 --> 01:02:43,103
- [laughs] I'm fine.
- Baby, will you please get off the phone?
1379
01:02:43,105 --> 01:02:44,737
You said this was family day.
1380
01:02:44,739 --> 01:02:46,536
I know.
I'm talking to my mother.
1381
01:02:46,538 --> 01:02:47,905
Oh, I didn't know.
1382
01:02:48,405 --> 01:02:50,004
Look, Ma, I got to go.
1383
01:02:50,006 --> 01:02:51,670
[Nick] If she botches this,
she is fired.
1384
01:02:51,672 --> 01:02:53,470
[Joe] And, baby, this is Ali.
1385
01:02:53,472 --> 01:02:55,269
She's the one I demolished
in poker night.
1386
01:02:55,271 --> 01:02:57,205
- Mm.
- I brought out the alpha dogs.
1387
01:02:57,538 --> 01:03:01,136
Is that the same alpha dog who was
supposed to get me a pinot grigio?
1388
01:03:01,138 --> 01:03:02,670
You know,
I tell you what, Mrs. Barry,
1389
01:03:02,672 --> 01:03:04,436
why don't I step out
to the main bar with you
1390
01:03:04,438 --> 01:03:06,738
and then I can get
some Mama Jamal stories, huh?
1391
01:03:06,740 --> 01:03:08,771
- Hey, bubby, don't be long!
- Mm-hmm.
1392
01:03:08,773 --> 01:03:10,171
You're my oxygen!
1393
01:03:11,271 --> 01:03:12,673
[crowd cheers]
1394
01:03:12,873 --> 01:03:15,339
[Jamal] Now, this is the court
I want to play on.
1395
01:03:15,840 --> 01:03:17,740
[Ben laughing]
1396
01:03:18,473 --> 01:03:19,940
- Ben, come here.
- Ben, come here.
1397
01:03:20,339 --> 01:03:22,606
- Ben, come here.
- Ben-Ben, come here. Here, now.
1398
01:03:23,008 --> 01:03:25,539
- Ben. Ben-ben, come here.
- No, Ben. Come, come, come...
1399
01:03:26,272 --> 01:03:27,638
- Ben, Ben, come here.
- Ben, come here.
1400
01:03:27,640 --> 01:03:29,841
- Ben, Ben. [laughs]
- [laughs] Ben.
1401
01:03:30,172 --> 01:03:31,373
- Ben.
- Ben. Come...
1402
01:03:31,774 --> 01:03:33,574
- Ben, come here.
- Ben, Ben, come here.
1403
01:03:33,841 --> 01:03:37,105
Wow! Y'all are cute, man.
Y'all so cute!
1404
01:03:37,107 --> 01:03:39,805
[both] Ahh!
1405
01:03:39,807 --> 01:03:42,138
Like peanut butter and jelly
and pickled herring,
1406
01:03:42,140 --> 01:03:43,574
you know,
but you got arms and legs.
1407
01:03:43,874 --> 01:03:46,474
- [laughs] That's so us.
- How did y'all meet?
1408
01:03:46,707 --> 01:03:48,674
- Uh... I'll take it! We...
- Well, I...
1409
01:03:49,607 --> 01:03:51,842
Uh, well,
it's kind of embarrassing.
1410
01:03:52,307 --> 01:03:53,875
It was a one-night stand.
1411
01:03:54,140 --> 01:03:56,606
Wow, nice! Yeah, nice.
1412
01:03:56,608 --> 01:03:59,806
Hey, ain't nothing wrong with a little
bit of shame in the Walk of Shame.
1413
01:03:59,808 --> 01:04:01,706
You know what I'm saying?
That's a paradox.
1414
01:04:01,708 --> 01:04:03,673
But now y'all can enjoy
your fruits of y'all labor,
1415
01:04:03,675 --> 01:04:05,973
'cause that's what it's about!
You know, 'cause...
1416
01:04:05,975 --> 01:04:08,406
[Will] What in the fuck
is he talking about?
1417
01:04:08,408 --> 01:04:09,873
Fruits, he's...
1418
01:04:09,875 --> 01:04:11,740
Little man! You planning
being a baller someday?
1419
01:04:11,742 --> 01:04:13,007
Oh, yes! Ben...
1420
01:04:13,009 --> 01:04:14,974
Big Ben loves basketball.
Isn't that right, Ben?
1421
01:04:14,976 --> 01:04:17,506
I don't... I don't really...
I don't really think so.
1422
01:04:17,508 --> 01:04:19,073
Actually, no. You know...
1423
01:04:19,075 --> 01:04:20,941
He finds the craziest stuff
on the Internet.
1424
01:04:20,943 --> 01:04:22,807
- Yes, he does.
- I got to limit his screen time.
1425
01:04:22,809 --> 01:04:24,841
You know? Because me,
you know, I'm a single...
1426
01:04:24,843 --> 01:04:27,440
Uh, you know what?
I am... [coughs] parched.
1427
01:04:27,442 --> 01:04:29,376
Can you please get me
some wine, baby?
1428
01:04:29,643 --> 01:04:31,641
Yeah, yeah. What do you want?
They got red, white...
1429
01:04:31,643 --> 01:04:33,841
It doesn't matter. Surprise me.
1430
01:04:33,843 --> 01:04:36,207
- Go get some. Just go get me some.
- Ali.
1431
01:04:36,209 --> 01:04:37,875
Ah, you know me.
1432
01:04:37,877 --> 01:04:38,910
Get me some!
1433
01:04:39,409 --> 01:04:40,742
- Surprise me!
- You've got a strong hand.
1434
01:04:40,744 --> 01:04:42,675
- Oh, you so crazy!
- It's strong.
1435
01:04:42,677 --> 01:04:44,608
- He's silly.
- He don't know your wine preference?
1436
01:04:44,610 --> 01:04:46,808
Oh, he does.
We just like surprises, that's all.
1437
01:04:46,810 --> 01:04:49,577
Guess what?
My birthday's next week.
1438
01:04:49,944 --> 01:04:51,877
Ooh! How old you gonna be?
1439
01:04:52,910 --> 01:04:53,942
Tell him, Ben.
1440
01:04:53,944 --> 01:04:55,041
Six.
1441
01:04:55,043 --> 01:04:56,408
Six.
1442
01:04:56,410 --> 01:04:57,742
[Jamal] You gonna blow it out,
little man?
1443
01:04:57,744 --> 01:04:59,575
Yes!
We're gonna do it really big.
1444
01:04:59,577 --> 01:05:01,775
We're gonna do big things
for his birthday. Right, Ben?
1445
01:05:01,777 --> 01:05:04,543
- You are?
- Yeah! Really big.
1446
01:05:04,745 --> 01:05:08,308
If we're talking blowout,
what I really wanted is
1447
01:05:08,310 --> 01:05:10,408
a cake shaped like a sports car.
1448
01:05:10,410 --> 01:05:13,676
Oh, you got it, Ben! You got it.
1449
01:05:13,678 --> 01:05:14,645
Promise?
1450
01:05:14,878 --> 01:05:16,208
Yes, I promise.
1451
01:05:16,210 --> 01:05:18,143
What... Wait, wait...
Oh! [laughs]
1452
01:05:19,144 --> 01:05:21,078
That's a beautiful thing, girl.
[laughs]
1453
01:05:21,378 --> 01:05:22,378
Ooh-hoo-hoo.
1454
01:05:23,511 --> 01:05:27,342
Well, thank you so much for coming.
I hope you had a good time.
1455
01:05:27,344 --> 01:05:29,509
Oh, no. We had an amazing time.
Thank you.
1456
01:05:29,511 --> 01:05:32,045
Hey, um, how about tomorrow
night I'll take you out?
1457
01:05:32,544 --> 01:05:35,477
But we gonna do something a little
bit more low-key than, uh...
1458
01:05:35,479 --> 01:05:37,943
- Oh, yeah, sure! Sure.
- Yeah, okay.
1459
01:05:37,945 --> 01:05:40,175
Okay, well, you go ahead home.
1460
01:05:40,177 --> 01:05:42,477
- Oh, hey!
- Wha... What...
1461
01:05:42,479 --> 01:05:44,610
- Good night! Good night. Ohh!
- Uh, okay...
1462
01:05:44,612 --> 01:05:46,644
Make sure you put him into bed.
I'll see you soon.
1463
01:05:46,646 --> 01:05:48,477
- I got it, I got it.
- All right, okay.
1464
01:05:48,479 --> 01:05:51,543
This boy get up and he drink
smoothies 16 times a day.
1465
01:05:51,545 --> 01:05:53,778
Sometimes he get the runs,
but it's all good.
1466
01:05:53,780 --> 01:05:55,645
That's only
when his mother make it.
1467
01:05:55,647 --> 01:05:57,745
You know what I'm saying?
'Cause she just overloads.
1468
01:05:57,747 --> 01:05:58,747
[man] Ali?
1469
01:05:59,245 --> 01:06:00,878
Karl-Anthony!
1470
01:06:00,880 --> 01:06:03,011
- How you doing, sweetheart?
- Great game, baby!
1471
01:06:03,013 --> 01:06:04,977
Triple double and we didn't win.
So, it don't mean shit.
1472
01:06:04,979 --> 01:06:06,910
- You know how that go.
- Those numbers, though.
1473
01:06:06,912 --> 01:06:09,444
You keep putting those numbers up.
Hey, Jamal!
1474
01:06:09,446 --> 01:06:10,910
Come here, I got somebody
I want you to meet.
1475
01:06:10,912 --> 01:06:13,277
- Oh, that's your mans?
- Well, I'm working on it.
1476
01:06:13,279 --> 01:06:15,411
- [Karl-Anthony] I feels you.
- [Jamal] Holy shit! Don't freak out.
1477
01:06:15,413 --> 01:06:17,244
It's Karl-Anthony!
Yo, he's looking at me!
1478
01:06:17,246 --> 01:06:18,213
Yo, Jamal Barry, right?
1479
01:06:18,714 --> 01:06:20,712
- Yes, sir. Yep.
- Appreciate it, man. Much love.
1480
01:06:20,714 --> 01:06:22,511
- Nice to meet you.
- Absolutely. Absolutely.
1481
01:06:22,513 --> 01:06:25,512
[Jamal] Holy shit!
Uh, hey, hey, don't freak out.
1482
01:06:25,514 --> 01:06:27,746
Yo, I've been watching you
since high school, man.
1483
01:06:27,748 --> 01:06:29,880
I must say, young fella,
I'm pretty impressed.
1484
01:06:30,114 --> 01:06:32,445
- Oh, for real?
- Yeah, man, you're killing it.
1485
01:06:32,447 --> 01:06:34,911
- Cool. Yeah, yeah, that's cool.
- [Karl-Anthony] Kid's nervous.
1486
01:06:34,913 --> 01:06:37,746
Probably thinking, "Holy shit,
it's Karl-Anthony Towns!"
1487
01:06:37,748 --> 01:06:40,579
[Jamal] Holy shit,
it's Karl-Anthony Towns!
1488
01:06:40,581 --> 01:06:44,046
Karl-Anthony, do you have any
advice for our young fella here?
1489
01:06:44,048 --> 01:06:45,912
- [Karl-Anthony humming]
- [Karl-Anthony] Listen, man, for real,
1490
01:06:45,914 --> 01:06:48,381
you got great things ahead of
you, but always remember,
1491
01:06:48,615 --> 01:06:51,245
no one has ever become a star
playing for himself.
1492
01:06:51,247 --> 01:06:52,713
Always got to keep
the team first.
1493
01:06:52,715 --> 01:06:55,713
[Karl-Anthony]
♪ If you like piña coladas ♪
1494
01:06:55,715 --> 01:06:57,879
♪ And getting caught
In the rain ♪
1495
01:06:57,881 --> 01:07:00,513
Damn! Got to get that
stupid song out of my head.
1496
01:07:00,515 --> 01:07:02,047
- You feel me?
- Totally.
1497
01:07:02,049 --> 01:07:04,215
[Jamal] I have no idea
hat he just said.
1498
01:07:04,782 --> 01:07:07,582
- Oh, shit. I'll see you.
- [Joe] Yo, Karl!
1499
01:07:07,949 --> 01:07:09,847
Hey, Karl! Hey, Karl!
1500
01:07:09,849 --> 01:07:13,382
Hey, I got a way to disrupt
the children's beverage sector!
1501
01:07:13,683 --> 01:07:15,215
That was a great game, right?
1502
01:07:15,716 --> 01:07:18,681
Well, just give me a call
if you need anything else, okay?
1503
01:07:18,683 --> 01:07:21,180
As a matter of fact,
there is something I need.
1504
01:07:21,182 --> 01:07:24,247
Can I get a ballpark estimate
of what kind of deals we expect?
1505
01:07:24,249 --> 01:07:26,648
You know what I'm saying?
Just for financial planning purposes.
1506
01:07:26,650 --> 01:07:31,081
Pops, you can't ask her to do work for
us if you haven't signed with her agency.
1507
01:07:31,083 --> 01:07:32,981
Yeah, but if I like what I hear,
1508
01:07:32,983 --> 01:07:35,249
- we can say we got ourselves an agent.
- [Loretta chuckles]
1509
01:07:39,484 --> 01:07:42,048
Brandon! Can you get me
some coffee, please? Thank you.
1510
01:07:42,050 --> 01:07:44,448
[Brandon] Peach cobbler,
peach cobbler, peach cobbler.
1511
01:07:44,450 --> 01:07:46,548
Peach cobbler with blueberries.
1512
01:07:46,550 --> 01:07:48,715
Peach cobbler warmed up.
Peach cobbler.
1513
01:07:48,717 --> 01:07:50,582
- What are you mumbling about?
- [Brandon] Peach cobbler à la mode.
1514
01:07:50,584 --> 01:07:52,915
I am thinking about
my favorite dessert
1515
01:07:52,917 --> 01:07:55,148
so that you can't hear
my actual thoughts.
1516
01:07:55,150 --> 01:07:57,782
Oh, no, no, no.
Out with it. Come, come.
1517
01:07:57,784 --> 01:07:59,716
I believe
you are a good person.
1518
01:07:59,718 --> 01:08:02,082
So, I am choosing to chalk
this fake-family business
1519
01:08:02,084 --> 01:08:04,483
up to an overabundance
of competitive spirit.
1520
01:08:04,485 --> 01:08:06,650
- Give me my coffee.
- There, I said it.
1521
01:08:06,652 --> 01:08:08,049
- [sighs]
- [phone chimes]
1522
01:08:08,051 --> 01:08:09,982
- Please.
- Oh, speak of the devil,
1523
01:08:09,984 --> 01:08:12,018
here is your fake husband now.
1524
01:08:12,485 --> 01:08:15,117
Aw, Will is inviting you
to hang out tonight.
1525
01:08:15,119 --> 01:08:16,516
- No.
- [typing]
1526
01:08:16,518 --> 01:08:19,182
- "That sounds like fun."
- What are you doing?
1527
01:08:19,184 --> 01:08:21,383
- "Let's do it."
- Uh, no.
1528
01:08:21,385 --> 01:08:22,516
Can you stop typing?
1529
01:08:22,518 --> 01:08:23,952
I'm not going on a date tonight!
1530
01:08:24,451 --> 01:08:28,617
"Any way I could bring
my friend Mari..."
1531
01:08:28,619 --> 01:08:30,651
- Wha...
- "...and her fiancé?
1532
01:08:30,653 --> 01:08:33,850
Just realized we had plans.
Could be a fun double date."
1533
01:08:33,852 --> 01:08:35,250
- Exclamation point.
- No, no!
1534
01:08:35,252 --> 01:08:36,417
- We do not...
- Send.
1535
01:08:36,419 --> 01:08:37,984
I don't have plans with her.
1536
01:08:37,986 --> 01:08:39,619
Come here, you little...
1537
01:08:40,686 --> 01:08:42,417
I don't have plans with Mari.
1538
01:08:42,419 --> 01:08:44,018
Exactly,
and she's getting resentful.
1539
01:08:44,020 --> 01:08:46,084
This way, you knock out
two birds with one stone
1540
01:08:46,086 --> 01:08:48,553
while using Mari and James as a buffer.
You're welcome.
1541
01:08:50,487 --> 01:08:52,451
Okay, fine. Fine.
1542
01:08:52,453 --> 01:08:56,150
But you agented me,
and agents do not like being agented.
1543
01:08:56,152 --> 01:08:58,685
[Brandon] Too bad.
And I should be an agent.
1544
01:08:58,687 --> 01:09:02,220
- What?
- You heard me, loud and clear.
1545
01:09:03,320 --> 01:09:07,551
So, you think you got what it takes
to be a good sports agent. Really?
1546
01:09:07,553 --> 01:09:09,085
What do...
what do you know about sports?
1547
01:09:09,087 --> 01:09:12,052
- Oh, basically everything!
- Oh, please.
1548
01:09:12,054 --> 01:09:13,785
I'll bet you didn't know
that Tom Brady,
1549
01:09:13,787 --> 01:09:15,952
the 199th pick
of the 2000 NFL draft,
1550
01:09:15,954 --> 01:09:18,284
has more playoff
touchdown passes, 68,
1551
01:09:18,286 --> 01:09:20,552
than number-one picks David
Carr, 65, and Tim Couch, 64,
1552
01:09:20,554 --> 01:09:22,386
had in their entire careers.
1553
01:09:22,388 --> 01:09:24,154
- I knew that.
- Oh, yeah?
1554
01:09:24,454 --> 01:09:26,920
And do you know what happened
on June 25, 2009?
1555
01:09:28,122 --> 01:09:29,921
Michael Jackson passed. Ha!
1556
01:09:30,855 --> 01:09:32,552
True. And tragic.
1557
01:09:32,554 --> 01:09:34,786
But it was also the day
that Steph Curry was selected
1558
01:09:34,788 --> 01:09:37,620
as the seventh overall pick
in the 2009 NBA draft
1559
01:09:37,622 --> 01:09:39,252
by the Golden State Warriors,
1560
01:09:39,254 --> 01:09:41,953
with a contract
totaling $12.7 million
1561
01:09:41,955 --> 01:09:44,455
over four years.
1562
01:09:44,955 --> 01:09:46,821
Isn't that great?
1563
01:09:47,188 --> 01:09:49,553
You know sports trivia.
That's beautiful.
1564
01:09:49,555 --> 01:09:51,320
But it takes more
to being an agent.
1565
01:09:51,322 --> 01:09:53,087
You have to know
how to handle people, sweetie.
1566
01:09:53,089 --> 01:09:54,520
[Brandon] Oh, you mean like
when I stopped you
1567
01:09:54,522 --> 01:09:55,987
from handing Rafael Nadal
1568
01:09:55,989 --> 01:09:57,620
a passed appetizer
with ham in it
1569
01:09:57,622 --> 01:09:59,520
because I read
in his autobiography
1570
01:09:59,522 --> 01:10:00,453
that he hates ham, cheese,
storms, and animals?
1571
01:10:00,455 --> 01:10:02,754
Okurrr!
Mm.
1572
01:10:02,756 --> 01:10:04,689
Oops, sorry.
Did that slip out?
1573
01:10:04,889 --> 01:10:07,054
Ooh. Someone's in a mood.
1574
01:10:07,056 --> 01:10:10,186
[chuckles]
Oh! I have a pick-me-up.
1575
01:10:10,188 --> 01:10:11,920
You have a secret admirer.
1576
01:10:11,922 --> 01:10:14,488
Oh, please. You are just trying
to change the subject,
1577
01:10:14,490 --> 01:10:16,223
- and it is not going to work.
- Mm-mmm.
1578
01:10:16,689 --> 01:10:18,423
Okay, tell me who it is.
[laughs]
1579
01:10:19,057 --> 01:10:20,621
Well, apparently,
1580
01:10:20,623 --> 01:10:22,588
Puppy Dog Danny
wasn't crushing on me.
1581
01:10:22,590 --> 01:10:24,354
It's you he wants to mount.
1582
01:10:24,356 --> 01:10:26,055
Ooh, there he is.
1583
01:10:26,057 --> 01:10:27,522
How big you think
Shaq's dick is?
1584
01:10:27,524 --> 01:10:30,690
[snickers]
Yeah, he's closeted, honey.
1585
01:10:31,090 --> 01:10:34,324
And he wants to pound
on your booty cheeks.
1586
01:10:34,723 --> 01:10:37,457
I don't know why.
But there you have it.
1587
01:10:42,157 --> 01:10:45,457
[R&B playing]
1588
01:10:56,991 --> 01:10:59,390
Ohh! Ho-ho!
1589
01:10:59,392 --> 01:11:01,722
You suck so bad.
1590
01:11:01,724 --> 01:11:03,756
You look like you had
a seizure, girl.
1591
01:11:03,758 --> 01:11:06,456
You can just pick up the ball and
drop it in the hole next time.
1592
01:11:06,458 --> 01:11:09,225
Really? You know,
both of y'all can shut up.
1593
01:11:09,859 --> 01:11:11,191
Nice shot, baby.
1594
01:11:11,658 --> 01:11:12,591
Bam!
1595
01:11:17,325 --> 01:11:19,289
Hey, can I get
some more limes, please?
1596
01:11:19,291 --> 01:11:20,557
Sure.
1597
01:11:20,559 --> 01:11:22,026
Here you go, keep the change.
1598
01:11:22,459 --> 01:11:23,690
- Thanks.
- That's right.
1599
01:11:23,692 --> 01:11:25,126
[James] Man, look at that ass!
1600
01:11:25,493 --> 01:11:27,393
I should tap that
before the wedding.
1601
01:11:27,859 --> 01:11:29,192
Shit, or after.
1602
01:11:30,127 --> 01:11:31,792
- You up, Ali.
- Mm-hmm.
1603
01:11:33,393 --> 01:11:35,326
- Excuse me.
- Go ahead.
1604
01:11:35,793 --> 01:11:37,324
- [James groans]
- [Mari] Oh!
1605
01:11:37,326 --> 01:11:38,924
- Shit!
- Ali!
1606
01:11:38,926 --> 01:11:40,658
What the fuck?
Those are his nuts!
1607
01:11:40,660 --> 01:11:42,891
Which are getting married to me
Saturday,
1608
01:11:42,893 --> 01:11:45,525
- and I want them in good shape.
- [James] Both balls, honey.
1609
01:11:45,527 --> 01:11:47,091
- Both of 'em?
- Yeah.
1610
01:11:47,093 --> 01:11:48,958
[James] Man, why is Mari
even friends with Ali?
1611
01:11:48,960 --> 01:11:51,058
She only gives a shit
about herself anyways.
1612
01:11:51,060 --> 01:11:52,128
Always flaking.
1613
01:11:52,726 --> 01:11:55,193
Only reason she's here tonight
is to show off her new guy.
1614
01:11:55,394 --> 01:11:57,658
What he wearing anyway?
Tight-ass jeans.
1615
01:11:57,660 --> 01:12:00,825
- Uh, are you having fun?
- Yeah.
1616
01:12:00,827 --> 01:12:02,525
- Work hard, play hard, right?
- [Ali] Mm-hmm.
1617
01:12:02,527 --> 01:12:04,627
Uh-huh. [chuckles]
1618
01:12:07,260 --> 01:12:10,527
- Anyone need anything else?
- No, we're good, thanks.
1619
01:12:11,994 --> 01:12:14,328
- Nice shot.
- Thanks.
1620
01:12:17,361 --> 01:12:20,860
Well, look at you,
impressing all the ladies.
1621
01:12:20,862 --> 01:12:22,627
Her? [scoffs]
1622
01:12:22,995 --> 01:12:23,895
Whatever.
1623
01:12:24,395 --> 01:12:26,393
[Will] Why would I waste
a second on her
1624
01:12:26,395 --> 01:12:28,461
when I got you standing
right here in front of me?
1625
01:12:33,628 --> 01:12:34,561
Um...
1626
01:12:34,862 --> 01:12:36,093
You know what?
1627
01:12:36,095 --> 01:12:37,660
Why don't you show me
how to play?
1628
01:12:37,662 --> 01:12:39,427
'Cause I suck. [chuckles]
1629
01:12:39,429 --> 01:12:40,960
- I would love to.
- Okay.
1630
01:12:40,962 --> 01:12:43,160
And to be clear,
if I'm putting my arms around you,
1631
01:12:43,162 --> 01:12:44,693
if I'm holding your hips,
1632
01:12:44,695 --> 01:12:46,396
it's just to get
your pool shot right.
1633
01:12:46,628 --> 01:12:48,794
- You're being professional.
- Just strictly professional.
1634
01:12:48,796 --> 01:12:50,559
You know,
I just care about my job.
1635
01:12:50,561 --> 01:12:53,128
- Okay, come on. [laughs]
- I'm good at my job.
1636
01:12:53,130 --> 01:12:55,362
["Golden" playing]
1637
01:13:24,463 --> 01:13:26,697
[song continues]
1638
01:13:42,098 --> 01:13:43,929
- [Will] Ah.
- [Ali] Whoo!
1639
01:13:43,931 --> 01:13:46,598
[Will] Oh, okay, okay.
Slow down. Slow... Wait.
1640
01:13:46,998 --> 01:13:49,963
- Slow down, girl. This isn't a rodeo.
- [Ali] Ah!
1641
01:13:49,965 --> 01:13:51,496
[Will laughs]
1642
01:13:51,498 --> 01:13:53,429
Yeah... Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Easy with the balls!
1643
01:13:53,431 --> 01:13:55,765
Easy with the balls.
They're attached to me.
1644
01:13:57,298 --> 01:13:59,932
Why are her eyes always closed?
Am I that ugly?
1645
01:14:00,165 --> 01:14:01,598
- [Ali moans]
- Oh, what the...
1646
01:14:02,165 --> 01:14:04,897
[Will] Damn, her eyes opened,
but she look crazy as hell.
1647
01:14:04,899 --> 01:14:06,330
They were better closed.
1648
01:14:06,332 --> 01:14:07,397
Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa...
1649
01:14:07,399 --> 01:14:09,699
God, easy on the balls.
1650
01:14:16,465 --> 01:14:17,932
What's up? You okay?
1651
01:14:19,899 --> 01:14:24,065
Just admit it.
This wasn't going so good.
1652
01:14:24,067 --> 01:14:25,397
What?
1653
01:14:25,399 --> 01:14:27,733
No, it was, it was, it was...
1654
01:14:28,266 --> 01:14:29,499
It was cool.
1655
01:14:30,366 --> 01:14:32,667
Okay, look. How about...
1656
01:14:33,833 --> 01:14:36,498
How about we try something
a little different tonight?
1657
01:14:36,500 --> 01:14:37,633
Uh, like what?
1658
01:14:39,267 --> 01:14:41,034
Like how about we call a truce?
1659
01:14:41,466 --> 01:14:43,933
Nobody is in control.
We'll just...
1660
01:14:45,101 --> 01:14:47,234
you know, we share a little bit.
1661
01:14:47,733 --> 01:14:48,834
Can you share?
1662
01:14:51,466 --> 01:14:53,398
- Yeah.
- Okay, okay...
1663
01:14:53,400 --> 01:14:55,200
Hey... share, share.
1664
01:14:55,801 --> 01:14:56,801
Share.
1665
01:14:58,501 --> 01:15:00,165
- Yeah, that's right.
- Okay.
1666
01:15:00,167 --> 01:15:01,766
[sensual music playing]
1667
01:15:01,768 --> 01:15:03,235
[Ali laughs]
1668
01:15:16,935 --> 01:15:18,600
[both panting]
1669
01:15:18,602 --> 01:15:20,702
[Ali breathes shakily]
1670
01:15:21,268 --> 01:15:22,502
[gasps]
1671
01:15:23,869 --> 01:15:25,235
[both quiet]
1672
01:15:28,335 --> 01:15:29,702
How was that?
1673
01:15:31,435 --> 01:15:33,335
It was phenomenal!
1674
01:15:34,202 --> 01:15:35,533
It was like you were in my head.
1675
01:15:35,535 --> 01:15:37,236
You knew everything
that I wanted.
1676
01:15:38,103 --> 01:15:41,366
Girl, I feel like I just ran half a
marathon. I need some electrolytes.
1677
01:15:41,368 --> 01:15:43,267
- You want some electrolytes?
- No... [laughs]
1678
01:15:43,269 --> 01:15:45,300
I don't smoke or nothin' after sex,
but I'm gonna get me some Gatorade.
1679
01:15:45,302 --> 01:15:46,567
- You want some Gatorade?
- No.
1680
01:15:46,569 --> 01:15:48,834
- I got flavors.
- I am good.
1681
01:15:48,836 --> 01:15:51,103
- Oh, okay. All right.
- I'm straight.
1682
01:15:52,037 --> 01:15:56,901
[Will] Ali, bomaye! Ali, bomaye!
Ali, bomaye!
1683
01:15:56,903 --> 01:15:58,038
Shit, yeah.
1684
01:15:58,469 --> 01:16:00,467
She the greatest of all time.
Thank you, Lord Jesus.
1685
01:16:00,469 --> 01:16:02,302
- Ali, bomaye!
- Yes!
1686
01:16:06,004 --> 01:16:07,369
[phone chimes]
1687
01:16:08,971 --> 01:16:11,168
Will and Ben are here.
They're on their way up.
1688
01:16:11,170 --> 01:16:12,404
I want to know something.
1689
01:16:13,404 --> 01:16:15,104
What do you see
in that gin jockey?
1690
01:16:15,671 --> 01:16:18,171
I mean, you're successful,
beautiful,
1691
01:16:18,470 --> 01:16:20,902
and he's a single parent
with no career.
1692
01:16:20,904 --> 01:16:22,604
Did you say "gin jockey"?
1693
01:16:23,005 --> 01:16:25,003
Yes, I said "gin jockey."
1694
01:16:25,005 --> 01:16:26,735
He is a businessman, okay?
1695
01:16:26,737 --> 01:16:29,169
He's saving his money
so he can open his own bar.
1696
01:16:29,171 --> 01:16:32,137
Like your gym.
Look, just please be nice.
1697
01:16:32,139 --> 01:16:34,437
Be nice?
I am nice. I'm nice as shit.
1698
01:16:35,538 --> 01:16:37,803
"Gin jockey"?
Where do you find these things?
1699
01:16:37,805 --> 01:16:40,638
- Come here, Dad. Hey!
- Hey.
1700
01:16:42,139 --> 01:16:44,970
- Dad, I need you to meet Will and Ben.
- Hi.
1701
01:16:44,972 --> 01:16:46,538
- Nice to meet you, sir.
- Welcome, welcome.
1702
01:16:46,872 --> 01:16:48,603
[Skip]
I'll give it three months.
1703
01:16:48,605 --> 01:16:51,238
She'll chew him up
and spit him out.
1704
01:16:52,638 --> 01:16:54,939
Hey, did you introduce yourself?
1705
01:16:55,304 --> 01:16:57,804
Hi, I'm Ben.
It's nice to meet you.
1706
01:16:57,806 --> 01:16:58,971
Wait, wait, wait.
1707
01:16:58,973 --> 01:17:02,570
[Will] So, tomorrow.
Big signing day, huh?
1708
01:17:02,572 --> 01:17:03,604
Yep.
1709
01:17:03,606 --> 01:17:05,038
No worries about, you know,
1710
01:17:05,040 --> 01:17:06,470
crazy Joe changing his mind
1711
01:17:06,472 --> 01:17:07,773
or Jamal trying
to stay in school?
1712
01:17:08,006 --> 01:17:09,971
Nah, I have a pretty good gauge
on that situation.
1713
01:17:09,973 --> 01:17:13,072
So I think I know
what's on Jamal's mind.
1714
01:17:13,074 --> 01:17:14,041
I'm sure you do.
1715
01:17:14,639 --> 01:17:17,072
But, you know,
knowing what's on a man's mind
1716
01:17:17,074 --> 01:17:18,905
is not the same
as what's in his heart.
1717
01:17:18,907 --> 01:17:21,404
Well, isn't it the same thing?
To get paid and get laid?
1718
01:17:21,406 --> 01:17:24,370
Wait. You really think
that's what men want?
1719
01:17:24,372 --> 01:17:26,974
- Mm-hmm.
- Wow.
1720
01:17:27,205 --> 01:17:29,304
- That's messed up.
- Well...
1721
01:17:29,306 --> 01:17:31,306
Have you ever
even trusted a man?
1722
01:17:32,142 --> 01:17:33,473
She trusts me.
1723
01:17:34,108 --> 01:17:35,840
Okay. Well, see...
1724
01:17:36,740 --> 01:17:41,407
I think that men and women just want
the same thing at the end of the day.
1725
01:17:41,975 --> 01:17:44,841
They want to be
with somebody they trust.
1726
01:17:45,373 --> 01:17:47,975
To be respected,
appreciated, and...
1727
01:17:48,608 --> 01:17:50,441
and just to feel safe.
1728
01:17:50,741 --> 01:17:53,341
So you believe men and women
want the same thing?
1729
01:17:53,675 --> 01:17:56,539
As a bartender, I've learned
to sit back and listen.
1730
01:17:56,541 --> 01:17:59,374
Eventually, you learn
how people really feel.
1731
01:18:00,076 --> 01:18:01,174
Good to know.
1732
01:18:01,608 --> 01:18:04,207
[Will]
Wow, she is really beautiful.
1733
01:18:04,541 --> 01:18:06,709
[Skip] So, now that we know
what men and women want,
1734
01:18:07,043 --> 01:18:09,640
- the question is what do boys want?
- [chuckles]
1735
01:18:09,642 --> 01:18:12,074
Got any gift ideas
for your birthday, Ben?
1736
01:18:12,076 --> 01:18:13,774
My dad works real hard,
1737
01:18:13,776 --> 01:18:16,143
so I try not to make
a big deal out of it.
1738
01:18:16,475 --> 01:18:19,340
It's mostly just
about me and him hanging out.
1739
01:18:19,342 --> 01:18:21,609
- [Will chuckles]
- Us, too.
1740
01:18:23,409 --> 01:18:25,807
Do you know that Ali grew up
without a mom?
1741
01:18:25,809 --> 01:18:28,175
[Skip] I think
about that woman every day.
1742
01:18:28,609 --> 01:18:29,877
And it still hurts.
1743
01:18:30,242 --> 01:18:34,407
You know, Ben, I imagine your
dad had to work extra hard
1744
01:18:34,409 --> 01:18:36,306
to raise a kid as kind as you.
1745
01:18:36,308 --> 01:18:37,576
Thank you, Skip.
1746
01:18:38,443 --> 01:18:40,743
I think you can appreciate it
more than most.
1747
01:18:42,943 --> 01:18:44,176
To fatherhood.
1748
01:18:53,309 --> 01:18:54,209
[woman] You did it!
1749
01:18:54,543 --> 01:18:56,174
You guys day drinking? I'm in.
1750
01:18:56,176 --> 01:18:57,508
[Brandon] Oh, hey.
1751
01:18:57,510 --> 01:18:58,976
Yeah. Let me just grab
two more glasses.
1752
01:18:58,978 --> 01:19:00,474
I'll be right back.
1753
01:19:00,476 --> 01:19:01,542
Did you figure out
who you're gonna draft,
1754
01:19:01,544 --> 01:19:02,709
Roethlisberger or Brady?
1755
01:19:02,711 --> 01:19:04,542
I think I'm gonna go with Brady,
1756
01:19:04,544 --> 01:19:06,174
but my friend Duncan said
he's gonna get Roethlisberger,
1757
01:19:06,176 --> 01:19:07,942
and we can swap
any time we want.
1758
01:19:07,944 --> 01:19:10,475
[Brandon] God, he's beautiful.
And he loves fantasy football?
1759
01:19:10,477 --> 01:19:12,109
[Danny]
What kind of league is that?
1760
01:19:12,111 --> 01:19:14,010
Do you have to wear
a weird T-shirt or some shit?
1761
01:19:14,012 --> 01:19:16,979
[Danny] It sounds nice.
And he plays fantasy football?
1762
01:19:17,477 --> 01:19:18,644
He's perfect.
1763
01:19:19,046 --> 01:19:22,377
Hey, you know what?
Why don't you two play together?
1764
01:19:23,012 --> 01:19:25,476
- Oh, yeah.
- Yeah, I... I would love that.
1765
01:19:25,478 --> 01:19:26,910
You know, you can't pick...
1766
01:19:26,912 --> 01:19:28,777
[Brandon]
Do you take this man
1767
01:19:28,779 --> 01:19:31,208
to be your lawfully
wedded husband?
1768
01:19:31,210 --> 01:19:33,010
He's got it all! Uh!
1769
01:19:37,262 --> 01:19:40,260
Okay, you know what?
I have to get a lot of work done
1770
01:19:40,262 --> 01:19:42,360
before Will comes here
to take me to lunch, so...
1771
01:19:42,362 --> 01:19:44,128
Hey, did you see?
Joe Dolla called a press conference.
1772
01:19:44,130 --> 01:19:45,261
- What?
- [Joe on TV] That's right.
1773
01:19:45,263 --> 01:19:46,893
I'm telling you,
1774
01:19:46,895 --> 01:19:48,228
when it come to him,
he look just like me.
1775
01:19:48,230 --> 01:19:50,028
This is my son.
1776
01:19:50,030 --> 01:19:52,861
Matter of fact, we gonna withdraw
from the NBA draft right now.
1777
01:19:52,863 --> 01:19:55,827
I'ma take Jamal's gifts
to the great nation of China.
1778
01:19:55,829 --> 01:19:57,861
Ni hao! Holla!
1779
01:19:57,863 --> 01:19:59,360
[man on TV] What about
all that talk of playing
1780
01:19:59,362 --> 01:20:00,827
for your hometown, Jamal?
1781
01:20:00,829 --> 01:20:03,194
What can I say?
You know, situation changed.
1782
01:20:03,196 --> 01:20:05,460
[man 2 on TV] What kind of money
are the Chinese offering?
1783
01:20:05,462 --> 01:20:07,229
Our new concierge agent,
1784
01:20:07,231 --> 01:20:09,162
Ethan Fowler,
he gonna answer that.
1785
01:20:09,164 --> 01:20:10,961
- Money Man! Tell 'em wassup.
- [Ethan on TV] Yep.
1786
01:20:10,963 --> 01:20:12,894
Hey there, ladies and gentlemen.
Ethan Fowler.
1787
01:20:12,896 --> 01:20:15,427
Our good friends in China
are currently offering
1788
01:20:15,429 --> 01:20:18,129
three times
the rookie NBA deal, okay?
1789
01:20:18,131 --> 01:20:20,795
[man 3 on TV] Does this mean you've
signed with Summit Worldwide?
1790
01:20:20,797 --> 01:20:22,527
I'll actually answer
that one. Uh...
1791
01:20:22,529 --> 01:20:24,162
I've currently left Summit
1792
01:20:24,164 --> 01:20:27,396
to focus exclusively all my time
and energy on one client.
1793
01:20:27,398 --> 01:20:29,895
He cut,
he sliced his rates in half.
1794
01:20:29,897 --> 01:20:31,196
- Yeah, I know.
- In half!
1795
01:20:31,198 --> 01:20:32,329
I mean, come on, ten percent...
1796
01:20:32,331 --> 01:20:33,864
that is highway robbery.
1797
01:20:34,897 --> 01:20:39,165
[phones ringing in distance]
1798
01:20:40,198 --> 01:20:41,563
Everybody out.
1799
01:20:42,364 --> 01:20:44,032
Out! Get out!
1800
01:20:44,698 --> 01:20:47,564
Ali. You stay.
1801
01:20:51,464 --> 01:20:54,729
Uh, I'm sure that China deal
is not closed.
1802
01:20:54,731 --> 01:20:56,265
We can still save this.
1803
01:20:56,531 --> 01:20:57,898
[chuckles]
1804
01:20:58,265 --> 01:21:00,399
We can save this. [chuckles]
1805
01:21:00,731 --> 01:21:03,332
Five-percent commission. Wow.
1806
01:21:04,033 --> 01:21:07,197
Not only did you blow this
signing, you gave Ethan the idea
1807
01:21:07,199 --> 01:21:09,630
that could very well fuck our
business model completely.
1808
01:21:09,632 --> 01:21:11,496
Okay, this is not all my fault.
1809
01:21:11,498 --> 01:21:14,864
I mean, if I didn't think I'd get
crucified by all those MeToo-ers,
1810
01:21:14,866 --> 01:21:16,599
I'd fire your ass today.
1811
01:21:17,366 --> 01:21:20,732
Oh, so you're saying you're not
firing me because I'm a woman.
1812
01:21:22,099 --> 01:21:24,200
No. Not just that.
1813
01:21:25,599 --> 01:21:26,632
Oh.
1814
01:21:27,266 --> 01:21:31,034
So, you're not firing me
because I'm a black woman.
1815
01:21:31,333 --> 01:21:33,366
No. No, no. I didn't say that.
1816
01:21:33,632 --> 01:21:35,631
Because that'd be racist
and sexist.
1817
01:21:35,633 --> 01:21:38,430
Hell, no.
I am not your twofer.
1818
01:21:38,432 --> 01:21:40,032
I dare you to fire me.
1819
01:21:40,034 --> 01:21:42,566
My clients will follow me
out that door.
1820
01:21:43,100 --> 01:21:45,600
[snickers]
You keep on dreaming that dream.
1821
01:21:49,200 --> 01:21:50,966
- Nick, please...
- Nope, not happening.
1822
01:21:50,968 --> 01:21:52,531
- [Will] There she goes.
- Hey.
1823
01:21:52,533 --> 01:21:53,866
- Hey, girl, ready for lunch?
- Yeah.
1824
01:21:53,868 --> 01:21:55,498
I can wait downstairs
if that's better.
1825
01:21:55,500 --> 01:21:57,500
- Okay.
- Oh, great. You know what?
1826
01:21:58,068 --> 01:22:00,498
You can stop pretending.
Okay, Will?
1827
01:22:00,500 --> 01:22:01,768
If that's even your name.
1828
01:22:02,035 --> 01:22:05,499
Actually, I'm glad this
charade can finally end.
1829
01:22:05,501 --> 01:22:07,999
Sorry, "charade"?
What's he talking about?
1830
01:22:08,001 --> 01:22:09,501
- Nick, please, don't...
- You two.
1831
01:22:10,001 --> 01:22:11,601
Pretending that
y'all are married
1832
01:22:11,901 --> 01:22:14,368
to impress that fucking fraud
Joe Dolla!
1833
01:22:14,868 --> 01:22:17,835
Well, you know what?
It didn't work.
1834
01:22:18,634 --> 01:22:20,501
Mr. Family Man, huh?
1835
01:22:22,835 --> 01:22:25,400
Okay, whoo.
This is a big misunderstanding.
1836
01:22:25,402 --> 01:22:26,402
So wait, wait, hold up.
1837
01:22:27,368 --> 01:22:29,969
That's why you really
invited us to the game?
1838
01:22:30,835 --> 01:22:33,034
- No.
- Not to make up for the fact
1839
01:22:33,036 --> 01:22:37,267
that you accused me of cheating
on my dead wife with you?
1840
01:22:37,269 --> 01:22:38,269
No.
1841
01:22:38,568 --> 01:22:40,401
Please, it is very complicated.
1842
01:22:40,403 --> 01:22:43,502
- Just let me talk to you alone.
- About... About what?
1843
01:22:43,735 --> 01:22:48,003
About what? How you used my son,
my child, as a prop?
1844
01:22:54,136 --> 01:22:55,070
Just...
1845
01:22:55,503 --> 01:22:57,136
- Please.
- Please stay away from us.
1846
01:22:58,237 --> 01:22:59,170
Please.
1847
01:23:06,636 --> 01:23:08,871
[somber music plays]
1848
01:23:18,804 --> 01:23:21,271
These powers
have ruined my life.
1849
01:23:21,837 --> 01:23:23,604
I would like to return them.
1850
01:23:24,038 --> 01:23:26,204
Or whatever you do with powers.
1851
01:23:26,405 --> 01:23:27,804
Well, if I can be real,
1852
01:23:28,338 --> 01:23:31,405
I finished off the Haitian tea,
drunk it all myself.
1853
01:23:31,771 --> 01:23:33,736
- And...
- The only voices I heard
1854
01:23:33,738 --> 01:23:36,772
were Joan Rivers and Tupac.
1855
01:23:37,504 --> 01:23:39,371
And they did not get along.
1856
01:23:39,972 --> 01:23:43,538
[sighs]
My God, this is a disaster.
1857
01:23:44,438 --> 01:23:48,104
[clicks tongue] Mm.
Maybe you looking at it the wrong way.
1858
01:23:49,705 --> 01:23:53,172
With power comes a
responsibility to tell the truth.
1859
01:23:53,838 --> 01:23:55,772
Have you been telling the truth?
1860
01:23:56,873 --> 01:23:58,773
You need to let
the spirit guide you.
1861
01:23:59,773 --> 01:24:02,006
[mystical music playing]
1862
01:24:04,072 --> 01:24:05,606
[Ali exhales]
1863
01:24:11,806 --> 01:24:13,873
- The spirit.
- Yeah.
1864
01:24:21,539 --> 01:24:22,974
Spirit.
1865
01:24:25,073 --> 01:24:27,106
[chattering]
1866
01:24:30,540 --> 01:24:34,038
Yikes. Hey, maybe we, uh,
take it easy on the drinky-drink there.
1867
01:24:34,040 --> 01:24:36,038
Ceremony's about to start
and you're in it, okay?
1868
01:24:36,040 --> 01:24:38,272
No, no, no.
I need a cranberry vodka
1869
01:24:38,274 --> 01:24:40,605
because I'm feeling the spirit,
Brandon.
1870
01:24:40,607 --> 01:24:43,107
- Uh-huh.
- I have words, they need saying.
1871
01:24:43,540 --> 01:24:46,973
As a matter of fact,
everybody in here
1872
01:24:46,975 --> 01:24:49,973
needs a big, steaming mug
of hot tea.
1873
01:24:49,975 --> 01:24:52,973
Oh, or maybe everybody just
sticks with water, you know...
1874
01:24:52,975 --> 01:24:55,839
No. No, no, no. How about you go get
that vodka cran like I said, baby.
1875
01:24:55,841 --> 01:24:58,074
- Uh-huh.
- Trusty assistant. Go.
1876
01:24:58,409 --> 01:24:59,439
Hm.
1877
01:24:59,441 --> 01:25:00,906
[man] And Christ said,
1878
01:25:00,908 --> 01:25:02,572
"A man shall leave
his mother and father
1879
01:25:02,574 --> 01:25:04,275
and cleave to his wife,
1880
01:25:05,008 --> 01:25:06,907
so that they are
no more twain..."
1881
01:25:06,909 --> 01:25:09,874
[man 1] Check out that tasty
Oreo bridesmaid sandwich.
1882
01:25:09,876 --> 01:25:12,273
[man 2] I can't believe how long
this Viagra's lasting!
1883
01:25:12,275 --> 01:25:14,506
[man 3] Can't believe I'm
missing the game for this shit.
1884
01:25:14,508 --> 01:25:15,774
[man 4]
Did I leave my keys on my desk?
1885
01:25:15,776 --> 01:25:17,407
[man 5] ♪ Cotton-eyed Joe ♪
1886
01:25:17,409 --> 01:25:19,408
♪ I'd been married
A long time ago ♪
1887
01:25:19,410 --> 01:25:21,206
♪ Where did you come from?
Where did you go? ♪
1888
01:25:21,208 --> 01:25:23,206
[man 6] Oh, man. This suit's
giving me a swamp ass.
1889
01:25:23,208 --> 01:25:25,374
[man 7] I love the word
"Toledo." To-le-do.
1890
01:25:25,376 --> 01:25:27,141
[man 8] Can't believe I said "I
love you" to the delivery guy.
1891
01:25:27,143 --> 01:25:29,041
[James] Look at Gabby's tits
just hanging out.
1892
01:25:29,043 --> 01:25:31,341
Haven't tapped that
since Mari was in Boston.
1893
01:25:31,343 --> 01:25:33,141
Might need to get that again
soon though.
1894
01:25:33,143 --> 01:25:34,573
Ladies and gentlemen,
the bride and groom
1895
01:25:34,575 --> 01:25:36,207
have written their own vows.
1896
01:25:36,209 --> 01:25:37,609
- James?
- Yes, sir.
1897
01:25:38,343 --> 01:25:41,007
When I met you on that
sun-dappled June afternoon
1898
01:25:41,009 --> 01:25:42,741
- at the Waffle House...
- [whispers] He said, "dappled".
1899
01:25:42,743 --> 01:25:44,541
...and you put
that whole bottle of hot sauce
1900
01:25:44,543 --> 01:25:45,576
on your two-piece...
1901
01:25:46,209 --> 01:25:48,574
I knew right then there'd
never be another woman for me.
1902
01:25:48,576 --> 01:25:50,574
Oh, God.
I'm so sorry. I'm sorry.
1903
01:25:50,576 --> 01:25:53,608
- I'm so, so sorry.
- What the hell?
1904
01:25:53,610 --> 01:25:56,142
I... have something I gotta say.
1905
01:25:56,144 --> 01:25:57,508
What are you doing?
1906
01:25:57,510 --> 01:26:00,576
Girl, I am letting the spirit
move me.
1907
01:26:00,844 --> 01:26:01,744
Huh?
1908
01:26:03,411 --> 01:26:04,778
[Ali] I...
1909
01:26:06,177 --> 01:26:07,744
I've been given a gift.
1910
01:26:08,144 --> 01:26:09,642
Possibly by God.
1911
01:26:09,644 --> 01:26:11,742
Possibly by a low-rent,
1912
01:26:11,744 --> 01:26:14,178
hair-styling,
weed-dealing psychic. But...
1913
01:26:14,878 --> 01:26:17,345
I can hear men's thoughts.
1914
01:26:17,711 --> 01:26:18,776
[Brandon clears throat]
1915
01:26:18,778 --> 01:26:20,509
Ali, why don't you just come
1916
01:26:20,511 --> 01:26:21,877
sit down here with me
for a minute?
1917
01:26:21,879 --> 01:26:23,178
Uh, Brandon, back up.
1918
01:26:23,577 --> 01:26:24,477
Back up.
1919
01:26:24,779 --> 01:26:26,376
I'm just saying,
as your friend...
1920
01:26:26,378 --> 01:26:28,943
You... are not my friend.
1921
01:26:28,945 --> 01:26:31,412
You are my assistant, though.
1922
01:26:31,712 --> 01:26:33,576
And right now
you're not assisting me,
1923
01:26:33,578 --> 01:26:36,277
you're interrupting my message!
1924
01:26:36,279 --> 01:26:39,144
So I need you to sit down
and shut the fuck up!
1925
01:26:39,146 --> 01:26:40,476
[crowd clamoring]
1926
01:26:40,478 --> 01:26:41,612
Hallelujah.
1927
01:26:44,212 --> 01:26:45,445
You're on your own.
1928
01:26:46,246 --> 01:26:47,244
Excuse me.
1929
01:26:47,246 --> 01:26:48,313
[man] Thank... Thank you.
1930
01:26:48,813 --> 01:26:50,780
- Thank you for sharing that with us.
- [Ali] And...
1931
01:26:51,746 --> 01:26:53,346
because of my gift,
1932
01:26:53,912 --> 01:26:57,811
James, I know you are not worthy
of my friend, Mari.
1933
01:26:57,813 --> 01:26:59,277
[James]
What are you talking about?
1934
01:26:59,279 --> 01:27:01,345
And you need to know,
before you jump the broom,
1935
01:27:01,347 --> 01:27:04,211
that he slept with your
cousin Gabby last May.
1936
01:27:04,213 --> 01:27:05,511
[all gasping]
1937
01:27:05,513 --> 01:27:07,477
- What?
- While you were in Boston, girl.
1938
01:27:07,479 --> 01:27:10,045
That... That never happened.
That never, never happened.
1939
01:27:10,047 --> 01:27:13,011
I am so sorry, Mari.
He said you were on a break.
1940
01:27:13,013 --> 01:27:14,513
[all gasping]
1941
01:27:15,414 --> 01:27:16,714
Is this true?
1942
01:27:17,213 --> 01:27:18,380
Everybody lying right now.
1943
01:27:18,847 --> 01:27:22,415
- Mari!
- [Ali] Whoo! He deserved that! Amen!
1944
01:27:22,681 --> 01:27:24,445
- Bring it over here.
- Oh! Baby, hold on.
1945
01:27:24,447 --> 01:27:27,346
Ali, cut it out.
This is not the time or the place.
1946
01:27:27,348 --> 01:27:31,645
Well, Ciarra, you have problems
in your own house.
1947
01:27:31,647 --> 01:27:34,415
Don't throw no stones,
living in a glass house.
1948
01:27:34,714 --> 01:27:38,512
Excuse me? My house is fine.
In fact, it's locked down.
1949
01:27:38,514 --> 01:27:41,512
Okay? I think
you're just a little jealous
1950
01:27:41,514 --> 01:27:43,379
because we're all married.
1951
01:27:43,381 --> 01:27:45,012
I have always felt that way.
1952
01:27:45,014 --> 01:27:48,048
- Are you ser... Really?
- Yeah. Mm-hmm.
1953
01:27:48,715 --> 01:27:50,414
So look at yourself.
1954
01:27:50,416 --> 01:27:53,149
Well, your husband has been
getting his thing sucked,
1955
01:27:53,382 --> 01:27:56,414
- on the down-low, by his golf buddy Louis.
- [crowd clamoring]
1956
01:27:56,416 --> 01:27:58,013
I have always felt that way.
1957
01:27:58,015 --> 01:27:59,613
- [Ciarra] He what?
- [man] You've lost your mind.
1958
01:27:59,615 --> 01:28:00,949
I would never.
That's disgusting!
1959
01:28:01,282 --> 01:28:03,846
It wasn't when you were
sucking on my dick!
1960
01:28:03,848 --> 01:28:05,714
- [crowd exclaims]
- Oh, Lord, not in the church!
1961
01:28:05,716 --> 01:28:07,180
[woman] Hallelujah! A testimony!
1962
01:28:07,182 --> 01:28:09,480
You kissed me
with dick on your lips?
1963
01:28:09,482 --> 01:28:10,683
- Oh, hell, no!
- Whoo!
1964
01:28:10,882 --> 01:28:13,549
- [shouting]
- [all clamoring]
1965
01:28:16,749 --> 01:28:18,616
That's my brother.
Hold Terence.
1966
01:28:19,083 --> 01:28:19,949
Oh, no!
1967
01:28:21,250 --> 01:28:22,981
- Oh, yeah!
- [man] Everyone...
1968
01:28:22,983 --> 01:28:24,381
- Don't you take that! Don't you...
- [ripping]
1969
01:28:24,383 --> 01:28:25,580
Oh, yeah!
1970
01:28:25,582 --> 01:28:27,181
- Oh, really?
- My hair!
1971
01:28:27,183 --> 01:28:28,650
[women screaming]
1972
01:28:31,583 --> 01:28:34,083
- Eat it! Eat the wig!
- Just grow up.
1973
01:28:35,849 --> 01:28:37,148
[woman] Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
1974
01:28:37,150 --> 01:28:38,050
Bitch!
1975
01:28:40,116 --> 01:28:41,184
Stay back!
1976
01:28:41,617 --> 01:28:43,050
[metal clangs]
1977
01:28:43,950 --> 01:28:45,084
Oh, oh.
1978
01:28:48,817 --> 01:28:51,784
Well, hello. Welcome back.
1979
01:28:53,784 --> 01:28:54,951
I'd just like to say...
1980
01:28:55,817 --> 01:28:58,782
since your last visit,
I went to detox
1981
01:28:58,784 --> 01:29:00,718
and I got my life back on track.
1982
01:29:01,017 --> 01:29:02,151
So, thank you.
1983
01:29:07,118 --> 01:29:08,017
That's it?
1984
01:29:08,751 --> 01:29:10,018
That's what?
1985
01:29:11,817 --> 01:29:13,152
I don't hear anything.
1986
01:29:14,285 --> 01:29:15,352
No sound?
1987
01:29:15,818 --> 01:29:18,551
- No sound?
- No, no, no, I hear that. I just...
1988
01:29:20,085 --> 01:29:22,252
I... I don't hear
your inner thoughts.
1989
01:29:22,851 --> 01:29:24,851
That's a good thing, trust me.
1990
01:29:27,619 --> 01:29:29,983
Okay, so, um, great,
I guess I can go.
1991
01:29:29,985 --> 01:29:32,386
- Ah, well...
- Where my peeps at?
1992
01:29:32,918 --> 01:29:34,783
Ali, you can leave anytime,
1993
01:29:34,785 --> 01:29:37,552
but, um,
there's no one here for you.
1994
01:29:39,886 --> 01:29:41,086
Oh.
1995
01:29:43,919 --> 01:29:44,984
[exhales]
1996
01:29:44,986 --> 01:29:46,850
Guess I'll get myself home.
1997
01:29:46,852 --> 01:29:48,917
[somber music playing]
1998
01:29:48,919 --> 01:29:51,653
[footsteps pounding
on treadmill]
1999
01:30:01,154 --> 01:30:02,985
- [Nick] So let's just stay in...
- You hear me?
2000
01:30:02,987 --> 01:30:04,918
- ...your lane.
- [Skip] You got you.
2001
01:30:04,920 --> 01:30:07,985
[Will] About what, how you used
my son, my child, as a prop?
2002
01:30:07,987 --> 01:30:09,818
We share a little bit.
Can you share?
2003
01:30:09,820 --> 01:30:11,619
[Brandon] I believe
you are a good person.
2004
01:30:11,621 --> 01:30:13,319
[Kevin] It's not like you have
a lot of friends here.
2005
01:30:13,321 --> 01:30:14,954
[Will] Work hard,
play hard, right?
2006
01:30:15,187 --> 01:30:16,652
[Kevin] Constantly
throwing the first punch,
2007
01:30:16,654 --> 01:30:18,253
and you got you and no one else.
2008
01:30:18,255 --> 01:30:20,487
[Skip] That bartender
get back to you yet?
2009
01:30:22,454 --> 01:30:23,820
No.
2010
01:30:24,654 --> 01:30:27,888
And I don't blame him,
the shit I pulled. [scoffs]
2011
01:30:29,388 --> 01:30:31,988
I just wanted to win, you know?
2012
01:30:33,355 --> 01:30:35,088
I let it get away from me.
2013
01:30:35,655 --> 01:30:38,988
[chuckles]
No, no, no. That's on me.
2014
01:30:41,289 --> 01:30:45,156
When your mom took off,
I didn't trust anyone.
2015
01:30:46,423 --> 01:30:49,854
And... I put that all on you.
2016
01:30:51,588 --> 01:30:53,089
I'm sorry if I...
2017
01:30:53,989 --> 01:30:55,853
taught you some wrong lessons.
2018
01:30:55,855 --> 01:31:00,156
I wanted you to toughen up,
because I was so scared.
2019
01:31:01,655 --> 01:31:03,722
I didn't want you
to be scared, too.
2020
01:31:04,523 --> 01:31:05,623
Dad...
2021
01:31:06,156 --> 01:31:07,822
you did an amazing job.
2022
01:31:08,456 --> 01:31:10,822
- An excellent job.
- [chuckles]
2023
01:31:12,290 --> 01:31:15,390
No. This is all on me, okay?
2024
01:31:15,755 --> 01:31:17,456
I messed everything up.
2025
01:31:17,756 --> 01:31:20,723
And now I got to put my
big-girl drawers on and fix it.
2026
01:31:24,090 --> 01:31:27,890
You know, there's things
that we probably need to learn.
2027
01:31:28,325 --> 01:31:30,490
When to lower our fist.
2028
01:31:30,756 --> 01:31:33,358
There's so many
beautiful things that...
2029
01:31:34,058 --> 01:31:36,856
we don't see
because our hands are...
2030
01:31:37,656 --> 01:31:39,656
in front of our face.
2031
01:31:40,857 --> 01:31:41,891
[sighs]
2032
01:31:42,490 --> 01:31:43,891
[Skip chuckles]
2033
01:31:45,591 --> 01:31:46,791
Thanks, Dad.
2034
01:31:49,191 --> 01:31:51,991
You're the best. [giggles]
2035
01:31:56,458 --> 01:31:59,190
You know, I don't really need
to check with Ali on that one.
2036
01:31:59,192 --> 01:32:02,822
Serena Williams is not gonna do
local TV ads for a mattress store.
2037
01:32:02,824 --> 01:32:04,892
But thank you
for your interests.
2038
01:32:07,092 --> 01:32:08,092
You're here.
2039
01:32:08,758 --> 01:32:11,390
Yeah. Danny said it would
be better to look for work
2040
01:32:11,392 --> 01:32:12,589
while I still have a job.
2041
01:32:12,591 --> 01:32:14,023
So, I'm looking for work.
2042
01:32:14,025 --> 01:32:15,957
Which I'm sure
you already heard.
2043
01:32:15,959 --> 01:32:18,559
I don't have the power
anymore.
2044
01:32:19,260 --> 01:32:21,160
I can't hear men's voices.
2045
01:32:23,625 --> 01:32:26,625
So, I just told you all of that
for no reason.
2046
01:32:27,160 --> 01:32:29,658
Wow, I just cannot win.
2047
01:32:30,026 --> 01:32:32,960
Hey! Still the best part
of my day.
2048
01:32:38,759 --> 01:32:40,124
Wait, are you two...
2049
01:32:40,126 --> 01:32:41,691
Playing
fantasy football together?
2050
01:32:41,693 --> 01:32:42,793
Yes, we are.
2051
01:32:44,394 --> 01:32:46,793
[chuckles] That's great.
2052
01:32:50,027 --> 01:32:52,194
Can I talk to you
in my office?
2053
01:32:53,961 --> 01:32:55,027
Please?
2054
01:32:55,659 --> 01:32:57,161
Have a seat.
2055
01:33:01,194 --> 01:33:02,727
Listen, Brandon.
2056
01:33:03,361 --> 01:33:04,959
I'm sorry about that bullshit
2057
01:33:04,961 --> 01:33:08,228
about you not being cut out
to be an agent.
2058
01:33:09,162 --> 01:33:11,725
I would've told you anything
to keep you on my desk,
2059
01:33:11,727 --> 01:33:13,162
because I needed you.
2060
01:33:16,028 --> 01:33:18,795
And you're a better friend
than I deserve.
2061
01:33:23,560 --> 01:33:25,459
You... That's...
You're apologizing.
2062
01:33:25,461 --> 01:33:26,661
Yes.
2063
01:33:27,329 --> 01:33:28,995
- To me.
- Mm-hmm.
2064
01:33:29,462 --> 01:33:30,561
Wow.
2065
01:33:31,430 --> 01:33:32,995
I did not see that coming.
2066
01:33:33,962 --> 01:33:37,626
It's not a promotion or a raise,
but it is definitely something.
2067
01:33:37,628 --> 01:33:39,996
Okay, well,
you get a raise effective today.
2068
01:33:40,363 --> 01:33:43,294
And will until you find
something better.
2069
01:33:43,296 --> 01:33:45,263
And a promotion, TBD.
2070
01:33:46,196 --> 01:33:48,729
I don't even know
if I still work here.
2071
01:33:49,163 --> 01:33:50,229
Have you heard anything?
2072
01:33:53,196 --> 01:33:54,662
Well, thank you.
2073
01:33:59,829 --> 01:34:03,762
Oh, God, I just wish
I had gotten out of my own head
2074
01:34:04,431 --> 01:34:08,863
and gotten to know Jamal
instead of try to sell him.
2075
01:34:09,364 --> 01:34:12,030
I just wish I'd listened to him.
2076
01:34:32,365 --> 01:34:35,596
All right, you have got to
be psychic or something.
2077
01:34:36,332 --> 01:34:37,494
What you got over there?
2078
01:34:37,496 --> 01:34:39,462
Um, just a little Chinese food
2079
01:34:39,464 --> 01:34:41,231
to celebrate your success.
2080
01:34:42,165 --> 01:34:44,264
Well, I guess I'll be
eating a lot of it then.
2081
01:34:44,266 --> 01:34:45,531
You happy?
2082
01:34:47,166 --> 01:34:48,199
What do you think?
2083
01:34:51,399 --> 01:34:52,698
Let me see that.
2084
01:34:54,531 --> 01:34:55,797
I don't know.
2085
01:34:55,799 --> 01:34:57,765
I'm not even gonna pretend
to know.
2086
01:34:59,999 --> 01:35:02,064
- Whoo-hoo!
- Okay. Look at you.
2087
01:35:02,066 --> 01:35:05,064
What can I say?
My dad wanted a boy. [laughs]
2088
01:35:05,066 --> 01:35:07,598
Yeah, well, you don't even
have to tell me about dads.
2089
01:35:07,832 --> 01:35:09,832
You know, mine is, uh, unique.
2090
01:35:10,132 --> 01:35:11,498
That is very true.
2091
01:35:18,233 --> 01:35:20,699
Dad took me out to this court
when I was five.
2092
01:35:21,766 --> 01:35:25,700
And he would not let me leave
until I sank three in a row.
2093
01:35:26,167 --> 01:35:27,267
And it got us here.
2094
01:35:27,666 --> 01:35:28,864
I know it sounds corny,
2095
01:35:28,866 --> 01:35:30,531
but I want to win
a championship
2096
01:35:30,533 --> 01:35:32,067
and celebrate here.
2097
01:35:32,633 --> 01:35:34,234
With the people I grew up with.
2098
01:35:35,335 --> 01:35:36,333
That's my dream.
2099
01:35:36,335 --> 01:35:37,599
I get it.
2100
01:35:41,367 --> 01:35:42,633
Give me that.
2101
01:35:43,834 --> 01:35:45,765
You're gonna have a lot
of people coming at you
2102
01:35:45,767 --> 01:35:47,932
with all sorts of advice
from here on out.
2103
01:35:47,934 --> 01:35:49,531
- You know that, right?
- Right.
2104
01:35:49,533 --> 01:35:51,134
But you're the one
I should listen to, right?
2105
01:35:53,301 --> 01:35:56,301
No. The only person
you should listen to is you.
2106
01:35:57,336 --> 01:36:00,567
Because you're the only person
who knows what you really want.
2107
01:36:01,202 --> 01:36:04,069
Forget your head.
What's in your heart?
2108
01:36:08,102 --> 01:36:09,433
[chattering]
2109
01:36:09,435 --> 01:36:11,768
[Mari] Just fuck him. I'm done.
2110
01:36:12,235 --> 01:36:16,033
I always sensed that he was
a skeezy motherfucker.
2111
01:36:16,035 --> 01:36:17,733
But you know what?
I was on that marriage train
2112
01:36:17,735 --> 01:36:19,167
and I didn't want to get off.
2113
01:36:19,169 --> 01:36:20,599
Just fucking stupid.
2114
01:36:20,601 --> 01:36:23,566
When that woman
leaped onto the stage
2115
01:36:23,568 --> 01:36:25,270
and ripped out your hair...
2116
01:36:26,069 --> 01:36:28,367
I almost put down my phone
and said something.
2117
01:36:28,369 --> 01:36:31,835
- How is that helping us?
- Not... Oh, twelve o'clock.
2118
01:36:32,303 --> 01:36:33,466
Hi.
2119
01:36:33,468 --> 01:36:37,036
- [scoffs] No. No.
- No. No. No.
2120
01:36:37,369 --> 01:36:39,234
Nope, nope, nope, nope.
2121
01:36:39,236 --> 01:36:41,136
Let them grieve.
2122
01:36:42,203 --> 01:36:46,500
You know, by the grace of God,
my marriage is still intact.
2123
01:36:46,502 --> 01:36:48,168
It was stronger than theirs
to begin with.
2124
01:36:48,170 --> 01:36:50,968
But it is still intact,
because my husband wasn't there.
2125
01:36:50,970 --> 01:36:52,634
- What the fuck?
- All right?
2126
01:36:52,636 --> 01:36:54,335
But I am devastated
for the two of them.
2127
01:36:54,337 --> 01:36:55,667
Devastated.
2128
01:36:55,669 --> 01:36:57,971
- You ruined their lives!
- Um, look, I'm...
2129
01:36:59,904 --> 01:37:02,467
I know you guys probably hate me
for what I pulled.
2130
01:37:02,469 --> 01:37:04,870
I am so sorry, okay?
2131
01:37:05,204 --> 01:37:07,303
I really want
to make it up to you.
2132
01:37:07,804 --> 01:37:11,037
Look, I did what I did
because I love you, okay?
2133
01:37:11,570 --> 01:37:13,236
Not because I'm jealous.
2134
01:37:13,238 --> 01:37:14,835
I want what's best
for all of you,
2135
01:37:14,837 --> 01:37:16,935
and I'm not gonna let you
marry a skeezer
2136
01:37:16,937 --> 01:37:18,501
and I'm not gonna stand by
and not tell you
2137
01:37:18,503 --> 01:37:19,970
about your down-low husband.
2138
01:37:19,972 --> 01:37:21,936
I'm sorry.
I'm a friend, not an enabler.
2139
01:37:21,938 --> 01:37:25,402
That was some freaky-ass shit
you pulled.
2140
01:37:25,404 --> 01:37:27,404
You could hear men's thoughts.
2141
01:37:27,871 --> 01:37:29,803
And you didn't tell us,
your girls?
2142
01:37:29,805 --> 01:37:32,036
- Yeah, what the fuck?
- We should've been the first to know.
2143
01:37:32,038 --> 01:37:33,669
[Mari]
We could've helped you out!
2144
01:37:33,671 --> 01:37:35,138
- [Olivia] That's good information.
- Look...
2145
01:37:35,604 --> 01:37:37,502
I know I've been
a shitty friend.
2146
01:37:37,504 --> 01:37:38,803
- Mm-hmm.
- Yes.
2147
01:37:38,805 --> 01:37:40,171
- Very shitty.
- Terrible.
2148
01:37:40,173 --> 01:37:41,469
Very shitty friend.
2149
01:37:41,471 --> 01:37:43,337
And that is Jesus
speaking through me.
2150
01:37:43,339 --> 01:37:45,870
I mean, like skid-mark-in-the-drawers
shitty-ass friend.
2151
01:37:45,872 --> 01:37:49,137
I'm about to write poetry about
it, just to express my rage.
2152
01:37:49,139 --> 01:37:51,437
- Well, that's a good thing.
- [Olivia] Boo-Boo Shitty Kitty.
2153
01:37:51,439 --> 01:37:53,804
- [Mari] Shit on top of shit.
- [Ciarra] One star on Yelp.
2154
01:37:53,806 --> 01:37:56,204
- [Mari] Shitty Shitty Bang Bang Ali.
- [Olivia] "Knock, knock."
2155
01:37:56,206 --> 01:37:57,603
- "Who's there?" "Ali, and I'm shitty."
- [Mari] The shitty friend.
2156
01:37:57,605 --> 01:37:58,937
[Olivia]
Yeah, the shitty friend.
2157
01:37:58,939 --> 01:38:00,872
Okay.
All right, I deserve that.
2158
01:38:01,106 --> 01:38:02,672
I deserve it all.
2159
01:38:03,174 --> 01:38:05,704
But I want to make that up
to you too, okay?
2160
01:38:05,706 --> 01:38:10,107
I promise
to prioritize my life better.
2161
01:38:10,306 --> 01:38:13,838
You mean more to me,
and I should treat you as such.
2162
01:38:13,840 --> 01:38:17,707
Because I really do love you
and I need you in my life, okay?
2163
01:38:23,873 --> 01:38:27,606
All right.
Margarita Mondays on me. Shit.
2164
01:38:28,841 --> 01:38:29,973
Forever?
2165
01:38:31,675 --> 01:38:32,971
Mm-hmm.
2166
01:38:32,973 --> 01:38:34,738
- I'm about to get fired.
- I don't care.
2167
01:38:34,740 --> 01:38:37,004
[Olivia] I say if she wants
to pay for Margarita Mondays,
2168
01:38:37,006 --> 01:38:38,506
let's let her do it.
2169
01:38:38,508 --> 01:38:40,206
That's my cheat day
and you're gonna pay.
2170
01:38:40,208 --> 01:38:41,573
- [Ali] Okay.
- [Olivia] You will pay.
2171
01:38:41,575 --> 01:38:43,172
- Thank you.
- Okay, let's toast.
2172
01:38:43,174 --> 01:38:44,906
- We need to make a toast.
- Give it to her!
2173
01:38:44,908 --> 01:38:46,539
- We need to make a toast, come on.
- [Olivia stammering]
2174
01:38:46,541 --> 01:38:48,039
We'll toast, we'll toast.
We'll get some more.
2175
01:38:48,041 --> 01:38:50,942
To my three best friends.
2176
01:38:51,274 --> 01:38:52,473
- Yes!
- Cheers!
2177
01:38:52,475 --> 01:38:55,708
[NBA on ESPN theme playing]
2178
01:38:56,942 --> 01:39:00,039
[male announcer]
This is the 2018 NBA Draft,
2179
01:39:00,041 --> 01:39:04,342
and commissioner Adam Silver is
about to step to the microphone.
2180
01:39:06,042 --> 01:39:08,375
[applause]
2181
01:39:09,943 --> 01:39:12,709
Good evening,
and welcome to the NBA Draft.
2182
01:39:13,142 --> 01:39:17,008
These young men here tonight
represent the future of our sport.
2183
01:39:17,409 --> 01:39:21,140
With the first pick
in the 2018 NBA Draft,
2184
01:39:21,142 --> 01:39:22,676
the Atlanta Hawks select...
2185
01:39:23,709 --> 01:39:27,642
- Jamal Barry from Georgia Tech.
- [cheers, applause]
2186
01:39:29,843 --> 01:39:32,742
- Thanks for making this happen.
- So proud of you.
2187
01:39:38,176 --> 01:39:40,410
[cheering]
2188
01:39:50,944 --> 01:39:52,544
[indistinct]
2189
01:39:55,044 --> 01:39:56,643
Hey, hey, there she is!
2190
01:39:56,911 --> 01:39:59,175
The worst thing to happen
to US-China relations
2191
01:39:59,177 --> 01:40:01,909
since Richard Nixon
shot and ate a panda.
2192
01:40:01,911 --> 01:40:02,945
[both chuckle]
2193
01:40:03,377 --> 01:40:07,110
Joe, I really want you
on my team, okay?
2194
01:40:07,811 --> 01:40:09,410
How about we work together
2195
01:40:09,412 --> 01:40:13,142
to make sure Jamal
has an amazing career.
2196
01:40:13,144 --> 01:40:14,345
How about that?
2197
01:40:16,545 --> 01:40:18,609
- I like you.
- Thanks.
2198
01:40:18,611 --> 01:40:22,210
- See Jamal? That's my dude.
- Mm-hmm.
2199
01:40:22,212 --> 01:40:23,644
And you know dudes.
2200
01:40:25,212 --> 01:40:28,045
Well, that's the first time
I've heard that.
2201
01:40:29,645 --> 01:40:31,212
[Ali laughs]
2202
01:40:32,145 --> 01:40:34,612
[Nick]
Well, first order of business.
2203
01:40:35,078 --> 01:40:38,612
I guess we can all see that
Ethan has rejoined the team.
2204
01:40:38,946 --> 01:40:41,777
And we have dropped our lawsuit
accordingly.
2205
01:40:41,779 --> 01:40:43,877
[Ethan] Listen, guys,
that unfortunate China incident
2206
01:40:43,879 --> 01:40:48,112
was brought on, if you can believe
it, by clear braces. Uh...
2207
01:40:48,645 --> 01:40:53,177
Excessive salivation led to
dehydration, exhaustion, and stress.
2208
01:40:53,179 --> 01:40:55,144
You know.
But I'm great now. [slurps]
2209
01:40:55,146 --> 01:40:56,512
Happy to be back.
2210
01:40:56,514 --> 01:40:58,244
[Nick]
Ethan's no longer a partner.
2211
01:40:58,246 --> 01:41:00,746
And he'll be subject
to a yearly probationary review.
2212
01:41:01,947 --> 01:41:03,314
Now, with that being said,
2213
01:41:03,580 --> 01:41:06,979
seems like we have
a partner slot that has opened.
2214
01:41:07,947 --> 01:41:10,380
Or shall I say... "had."
2215
01:41:13,013 --> 01:41:15,580
I think we all know
what this is.
2216
01:41:16,113 --> 01:41:18,914
And I think we all know
who deserves it.
2217
01:41:19,681 --> 01:41:21,581
Let's give it up
for our newest partner:
2218
01:41:21,948 --> 01:41:23,312
Ali Davis.
2219
01:41:23,314 --> 01:41:25,011
[cheers, applause]
2220
01:41:25,013 --> 01:41:27,013
[uplifting music playing]
2221
01:41:29,848 --> 01:41:31,747
[men hooting]
2222
01:41:43,114 --> 01:41:45,682
Wow. Thanks. Thanks.
2223
01:41:46,148 --> 01:41:48,081
Thanks so much, Nick.
2224
01:41:51,048 --> 01:41:53,513
For so many years,
all I ever wanted
2225
01:41:53,515 --> 01:41:56,849
was to be a part
of this boys club.
2226
01:41:57,182 --> 01:41:58,548
It's all I ever wanted.
2227
01:42:04,149 --> 01:42:05,548
And...
2228
01:42:07,683 --> 01:42:11,716
I don't want to be
a part of your club anymore.
2229
01:42:14,049 --> 01:42:17,616
No, from now on, my self-worth
2230
01:42:18,250 --> 01:42:21,716
is not going to come
from a man's approval.
2231
01:42:24,383 --> 01:42:25,383
No.
2232
01:42:26,884 --> 01:42:29,481
I am going to compete and win
2233
01:42:29,483 --> 01:42:32,116
on my own terms, not yours.
2234
01:42:32,517 --> 01:42:36,114
So, I'm opening my own agency.
2235
01:42:36,116 --> 01:42:38,349
- [Ali laughs]
- [clamoring]
2236
01:42:38,351 --> 01:42:39,949
I'm sorry,
what's happening here?
2237
01:42:39,951 --> 01:42:41,815
Oh, calm down, Nick.
Have a Fiji.
2238
01:42:41,817 --> 01:42:44,049
I will come after
your clients hard!
2239
01:42:44,051 --> 01:42:45,382
Calm your nuts!
2240
01:42:45,384 --> 01:42:47,715
Look, you do very well
in your lane, Nick.
2241
01:42:47,717 --> 01:42:49,049
So, stay in it.
2242
01:42:49,051 --> 01:42:52,682
Oh, and, uh,
my partner is going to be...
2243
01:42:52,684 --> 01:42:53,584
Uh!
2244
01:42:55,284 --> 01:42:58,450
- What? Wait, bro. No way!
- [men clamoring]
2245
01:42:59,117 --> 01:43:00,449
I'm with her.
2246
01:43:00,451 --> 01:43:03,249
Okay, so on that note,
we're out.
2247
01:43:03,251 --> 01:43:06,350
Um, and we would like
to wish you the best
2248
01:43:06,352 --> 01:43:08,283
in all of your future endeavors,
2249
01:43:08,285 --> 01:43:09,818
i.e., go fuck yourself.
2250
01:43:10,052 --> 01:43:11,917
And kiss my black ass.
2251
01:43:11,919 --> 01:43:12,983
Let's go.
2252
01:43:12,985 --> 01:43:14,085
Hey, Nick.
2253
01:43:16,518 --> 01:43:18,350
Oh, there's one more box
at the front desk.
2254
01:43:18,352 --> 01:43:19,686
I'm gonna go grab it.
2255
01:43:20,185 --> 01:43:21,319
Okay.
2256
01:43:23,452 --> 01:43:26,320
The two of you are so cute
together, it's sickening.
2257
01:43:27,018 --> 01:43:29,016
Well, it's all thanks to you.
2258
01:43:29,018 --> 01:43:32,052
And I guess a little bit thanks
to that weird Sister lady.
2259
01:43:32,320 --> 01:43:34,884
Okay. Uh, so, all I need to
know now is where you'd like me
2260
01:43:34,886 --> 01:43:37,117
to make a reservation
for you and the other agents
2261
01:43:37,119 --> 01:43:38,218
to celebrate the new firm.
2262
01:43:38,220 --> 01:43:39,684
I took care of that.
2263
01:43:39,686 --> 01:43:41,351
I made reservations
for three at Pricci at 8:00.
2264
01:43:41,353 --> 01:43:43,284
- You made a reservation?
- Mm-hmm.
2265
01:43:43,286 --> 01:43:45,419
So, you, Kevin,
who's the third?
2266
01:43:45,787 --> 01:43:46,785
Oh, um...
2267
01:43:46,787 --> 01:43:47,986
Our new agent.
2268
01:43:48,353 --> 01:43:50,320
Um, you actually know this guy.
2269
01:43:50,520 --> 01:43:53,221
He's cute, he's short,
about your height, wears your glasses.
2270
01:43:53,620 --> 01:43:56,687
Yeah, he's gonna make
one hell of an agent.
2271
01:43:57,420 --> 01:43:59,720
I'm gonna be a...
You're making me a...
2272
01:44:00,720 --> 01:44:03,018
I'm just gonna take a second
and try to read your mind
2273
01:44:03,020 --> 01:44:04,485
and see if you're
fucking with me,
2274
01:44:04,487 --> 01:44:06,154
which would be
unbelievably cruel. But...
2275
01:44:06,487 --> 01:44:08,351
I think you're being serious.
Is this for real?
2276
01:44:08,353 --> 01:44:10,087
Yes, and it's long overdue.
2277
01:44:11,386 --> 01:44:13,285
Permission to pick you up
and spin you around?
2278
01:44:13,287 --> 01:44:15,185
I think I'm gonna regret this,
but okay.
2279
01:44:15,187 --> 01:44:17,219
[high-pitched] Ah! Thank you so much!
Thank you, thank you!
2280
01:44:17,221 --> 01:44:19,188
Okay, wait a minute!
Hold on! Put me down.
2281
01:44:19,688 --> 01:44:20,921
Listen, listen, listen.
2282
01:44:21,354 --> 01:44:24,119
- Agents don't speak in that high tone.
- Hey!
2283
01:44:24,121 --> 01:44:26,088
Hey, what'd I miss?
What happened?
2284
01:44:26,554 --> 01:44:28,588
- Ali's making me an agent.
- Yeah.
2285
01:44:29,354 --> 01:44:30,689
That's so hot, bro.
2286
01:44:31,322 --> 01:44:32,854
- Stop!
- Oh!
2287
01:44:32,856 --> 01:44:34,119
[both shouting]
2288
01:44:34,121 --> 01:44:37,088
Oh, my God. Congrats.
2289
01:44:40,922 --> 01:44:42,322
Yeah, that's what's up.
2290
01:44:43,155 --> 01:44:44,889
- Yeah.
- Feel me. That's what's up, man.
2291
01:44:45,089 --> 01:44:45,988
Dope!
2292
01:44:46,355 --> 01:44:48,087
[Ali] Ooh, yes! Damn.
2293
01:44:48,089 --> 01:44:49,388
That's what's up.
2294
01:44:51,189 --> 01:44:52,955
All right,
who wants more cupcakes?
2295
01:44:52,957 --> 01:44:54,420
Me! Me! Me!
2296
01:44:54,422 --> 01:44:56,623
Wait, wait, wait. One at a time.
2297
01:44:57,823 --> 01:45:00,223
Um, uh... Bridget, would you...
2298
01:45:02,256 --> 01:45:04,354
Birthday cake delivery
for Ben.
2299
01:45:04,356 --> 01:45:07,087
- Ali, you remembered.
- Yes.
2300
01:45:07,089 --> 01:45:09,721
- That's a sports Turbo S.
- It is.
2301
01:45:09,723 --> 01:45:12,754
Maybe you can take a ride
in a real one someday.
2302
01:45:12,756 --> 01:45:14,990
Uh, Shonda,
would you mind taking the...
2303
01:45:15,823 --> 01:45:18,356
- Good to see you.
- Come with me, Ben.
2304
01:45:21,624 --> 01:45:23,624
[Shonda] Come on, kids.
Cake outside.
2305
01:45:24,190 --> 01:45:25,423
Can we talk?
2306
01:45:30,424 --> 01:45:32,489
I'm so sorry to show up
unannounced like this,
2307
01:45:32,491 --> 01:45:35,622
but I promised Ben
a birthday cake
2308
01:45:35,624 --> 01:45:37,991
and I wanted to honor
that promise.
2309
01:45:42,892 --> 01:45:44,491
And now I'll go.
2310
01:45:46,024 --> 01:45:47,091
Thank you.
2311
01:45:48,024 --> 01:45:52,091
But you do know that one grand
gesture doesn't just rewrite history.
2312
01:45:56,291 --> 01:45:58,159
Will, that night I met you...
2313
01:45:59,258 --> 01:46:02,323
I was afraid
that everything that I wanted
2314
01:46:02,325 --> 01:46:04,192
was being taken from me.
2315
01:46:06,159 --> 01:46:07,425
I've been there.
2316
01:46:08,558 --> 01:46:12,258
I was angry, and I disrespected
you, and that was wrong.
2317
01:46:14,325 --> 01:46:16,025
You see, I never...
2318
01:46:16,325 --> 01:46:19,223
considered what a man wants
or how he feels,
2319
01:46:19,225 --> 01:46:20,893
just as long as I won.
2320
01:46:21,459 --> 01:46:23,193
But what I've learned is that...
2321
01:46:23,626 --> 01:46:27,326
winning really doesn't matter
if you're a horrible person.
2322
01:46:28,126 --> 01:46:29,626
And you taught me that.
2323
01:46:30,559 --> 01:46:33,292
And I want to thank you
from the bottom of my heart.
2324
01:46:36,093 --> 01:46:37,326
Cool.
2325
01:46:38,694 --> 01:46:42,293
- Cool.
- Look, I know a lot has changed,
2326
01:46:42,527 --> 01:46:43,427
and so fast,
2327
01:46:44,026 --> 01:46:47,625
but, um...
I would really like a second chance.
2328
01:46:47,627 --> 01:46:49,994
And I understand if you say no.
2329
01:46:53,627 --> 01:46:56,391
- It's your third chance.
- Third? Oh, third.
2330
01:46:56,393 --> 01:46:58,191
It's... it's your third chance.
2331
01:46:58,193 --> 01:47:02,025
Shit, third.
Okay, well... [chuckles]
2332
01:47:02,027 --> 01:47:04,193
I like to believe
three's a charm.
2333
01:47:04,928 --> 01:47:06,761
But I totally respect...
2334
01:47:08,094 --> 01:47:09,761
- your decision.
- I, uh...
2335
01:47:15,828 --> 01:47:16,761
[scoffs]
2336
01:47:18,929 --> 01:47:20,126
Okay. Okay.
2337
01:47:20,128 --> 01:47:21,796
But on one condition.
2338
01:47:22,361 --> 01:47:24,359
Look, I need to know
everything you're thinking.
2339
01:47:24,361 --> 01:47:25,927
- Everything. The truth.
- Oh!
2340
01:47:25,929 --> 01:47:27,428
No matter how hard.
2341
01:47:29,562 --> 01:47:30,462
Negotiation.
2342
01:47:30,995 --> 01:47:33,227
That's something I promise you
I'm really good at.
2343
01:47:33,229 --> 01:47:35,562
Oh, don't you worry.
You ain't getting off easy.
2344
01:47:36,362 --> 01:47:37,929
- [giggles]
- Oh, you're not. [chuckles]
2345
01:47:38,329 --> 01:47:40,729
I'm taking Ben to the park after this.
Hang out.
2346
01:47:45,897 --> 01:47:48,928
[Ben] When you were my age,
what did you want to be?
2347
01:47:48,930 --> 01:47:52,063
Mm, I wanted to be a boxer,
believe it or not.
2348
01:47:52,497 --> 01:47:54,996
- Interesting.
- [Ali laughs]
2349
01:47:56,964 --> 01:47:58,428
Which do you like better,
2350
01:47:58,430 --> 01:48:01,196
Porsche Turbo S
or a used Subaru?
2351
01:48:01,396 --> 01:48:04,095
Uh, I would have to say
a Porsche.
2352
01:48:04,097 --> 01:48:07,294
- Well, at least until my lease is up.
- [Will] Uh-huh.
2353
01:48:07,296 --> 01:48:08,595
- [Ben] Makes sense.
- [Ali] Yeah.
2354
01:48:08,597 --> 01:48:10,495
- [Will groans]
- [Ali laughs]
2355
01:48:10,497 --> 01:48:12,963
[Will] So, what are you thinking
of calling your new agency?
2356
01:48:12,965 --> 01:48:16,127
[Ali] I'm thinking
Davis Athletics Management.
2357
01:48:16,129 --> 01:48:19,095
[Will] You do know,
abbreviated, that's DAM.
2358
01:48:19,097 --> 01:48:20,798
Like D-A-M. DAM.
2359
01:48:21,064 --> 01:48:22,764
- [Ali] That's right.
- So you do know.
2360
01:48:22,965 --> 01:48:25,729
[Ali] When people call,
I want the receptionist to say,
2361
01:48:25,731 --> 01:48:27,331
"DAM. How can I help you?"
2362
01:48:27,631 --> 01:48:30,162
- [Will] Aw, shit.
- [Ali] No, that's "Aw, DAM."
2363
01:48:30,164 --> 01:48:33,130
["Think" playing]
2364
01:49:01,600 --> 01:49:02,666
Hold this with me.
2365
01:49:02,900 --> 01:49:04,263
Someone else is here with us.
2366
01:49:04,265 --> 01:49:05,700
Who is it?
2367
01:49:05,933 --> 01:49:07,533
- Mari.
- Yeah?
2368
01:49:08,165 --> 01:49:09,564
Mari, it's me.
2369
01:49:09,566 --> 01:49:10,600
Who is it?
2370
01:49:10,867 --> 01:49:12,397
Why did you do this to me, Mari?
2371
01:49:12,399 --> 01:49:14,798
Why didn't you mind your own
fucking business, Mari?
2372
01:49:14,800 --> 01:49:17,998
You put me behind bars
and I killed myself, Mari!
2373
01:49:18,000 --> 01:49:20,564
- Oh, shit.
- You're a fucking bitch, and I hate you!
2374
01:49:20,566 --> 01:49:22,666
Mm. Mm.
2375
01:49:22,968 --> 01:49:24,631
You're having some difficulties.
2376
01:49:24,633 --> 01:49:27,364
Don't beat me in the head
with that mystical bullshit.
2377
01:49:27,366 --> 01:49:30,331
You ain't no psychic.
I just came to buy some weed.
2378
01:49:30,333 --> 01:49:31,998
Well, why didn't you
say something?
2379
01:49:32,000 --> 01:49:34,532
- I thought you knew.
- Nigga, how much you need?
2380
01:49:34,534 --> 01:49:35,998
Before you start,
I just want to say
2381
01:49:36,000 --> 01:49:37,834
I'm allergic to tea. So...
2382
01:49:38,032 --> 01:49:39,098
Ha.
2383
01:49:39,100 --> 01:49:41,499
Not TJ Maxx. [laughs]
2384
01:49:41,501 --> 01:49:43,165
'Cause I've seen
that robe there.
2385
01:49:43,167 --> 01:49:44,601
[song continues]
2386
01:49:44,603 --> 01:49:49,603
Subtitles by explosiveskull
182220
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